Spaghetti with Clams – Le Marche

What a wonderful and sometimes intense set of responses from my previous post - The Italy Rules. I want to take a little time today to expand and expound on some of my thoughts and provide further insight into traveling in Italy.

1. Italy Guides - Here is my short list of who I would travel with and why in Italy.

• The Rome Digest - This new and wonderful consortium of talented Rome guides includes my dear friend Katie Parla, who is my champion of all things Roman (pork, gelato, beer, wine, art, history, and life) If you are going to spend time in Rome, and you should, let the Rome digest draw a map for you
• Venice - Row Venice Nan McIlroy is one of the most knowledgeable people in Italy regarding living life, eating well, and getting out on the water. Don’t pay 200 euro for a snooze on a gondola. Pay less and get out there and learn to do it yourself. Easily one of the greatest experiences I have ever had in Italy
• Tuscany - Judy Francini will cook with you and teach you what it means to truly experience life in Tuscany. Reach out to her. She has been cooking successfully for her Italian husband for years. She will teach you how to impress anyone.
• Puglia - this is a bit biased but I can vouch for the unbeatable quality of Southern Visions Travel. Antonello Losito leads this superior company leading the most authentic excursions into Italy’s tastiest region. From 1 day to 1 month, these guys are amazing
• Le Marche - Mariano Pallottini - the best guides are sometimes not guides. For this truly under-the-radar region no one can show visitors the ropes like Mariano. Please tell him I sent you.
• Travel for Teens - If you would like to send your son or daughter on one of the most amazing experiences to be had. I strongly suggest using Travel for Teens. Managed and operated by a group of passionate, intelligent, and experienced men and women, TFT is the leader in volunteer and cultural travel in Italy for students. Ask for Ned or Nick and your young adult will be blown away
• For other Italian regions I have friends of friends and would be happy to do some research for you

2. Fashion - Italians for the most part are some of the finest dressers in the world. My initial post was not meant to imply they were not good as a whole. However, shitty fashion is a worldwide epidemic. I am guilty of lazy fashion choices more frequently than I care to admit. When Italians dress badly, they do it in typically grandiose furor. There is a store in Monopoli, Puglia called “Banana Store.” I assume this is some sort of knockoff of Banana Republic as the clothes tend towards the tighter side, made for people with fine and youthful figures. However, the patterns are simply gaudy and the colors never really seen outside of an old Vegas casino. The parade of muffin-top women parading about in Banana Store attire, 2-3 sizes too small is rough on the eyes. I am confident that while conservative and boring in dress, those of us not up to the task of Valentino, Armani, Dolce and G, etc. can rest easy so long as the Banana Store is in business (and the many stores just like them in the bedroom communities up and down the boot).

3. Italian Driving - While the idea of driving in Italy scares the hell out of many American visitors, driving in Italy is actually about 20% less likely to result in a fatality than driving in the USA. Italians have very strict rules of the road for highway driving. There is absolutely no passing on the right and tractor trailers must drive only in the right lane and only at a lower speed than auto traffic (which is posted clearly on the back of the truck). While parking rules, signal regulations, and almost any rule inside a city zone are frequently fudged, the rules for the highway are followed in most cases and make for a much more predictable driving experience. I really enjoy driving in Italy and feel safer than I do driving in a place like Houston, for example. Italian bus drivers are simply extraordinary drivers. Watching them drive, gesture, smoke, chat, and flirt all without breaking a sweat taking a Pullman down a narrow alley or into the bowels of a vineyard is simply art.

4. Hope - Italy is in very desperate financial straits at the moment (like 20 years ago) and there is a grim light being cast upon the country in regards to its future. Many young people are jobless and without prospects for a decent wage. Government inefficiencies, crime, and corruption siphon enormous amounts of the country’s GDP. Life goes on, and sometimes beautifully, in spite of this austere hell. My comments about this are not intended to suggest this is due to a lack of creativity in the Italian people. However, I will say it is up to the citizens of this important country to right the ship. Defeat is an ugly thing to witness when it comes at the hands of giving up. I believe in the Italians I know and love. I believe in the resiliency of this very talented people. I am an advocate for Italy when it seems there are few natives who are. Beat me up for my opinions on fashion, food, and driving, but do not accuse me of diminishing the chances of Italy because I describe life as chaotic. The Universe was born from chaos and so was the Renaissance. I return to Italy over and over not because I need a food fix, or a chance to play in the fields of folly and fantasy. I return to Italy year-after-year to experience living in a primordial space. I come to Italy to argue without offense, to dine with challenging people, and to grow as a person. I see the world more freshly every time I go and I have never lost my fervor for the peninsula in 20+ years of travel.

5. More Two Week Itineraries - This is where I am going to have some fun. Take a look at these if you want to explore some trips in the way of The Blissful Adventurer.

•  Piedmont/Liguria - surprisingly this tremendously rich and hard-working region is not always on the traveler radar. Stay in the towns near Alba and explore Italy’s finest red wines in Barolo and Barbaresco. These guys eat unpasteurized cheese any time of day. They have amazing local cows whose grass-fed meat is a dream served raw, and the prices to stay in amazing places like Villa Tiboldi  are wonderfully cheap. If one must see the Cinque Terre (thanks again Rick Steves) then why not hike through there, then finish with pure luxury in Piedmont.
• Sicily – 2 weeks is such a brief time to experience the island which a friend once referred to as a “continent”. Food: unreal, Wine: near the top on the planet these days. Weather: nearly tropical at times, People: alive and getting more alive with the growth of the economy (many would argue it is not growing but I believe it is really getting better). Land in Palermo and do the west. Go up to the Aeolian islands and sail out to active volcanoes. Make your way East and drink up the fine wines near Menfi or drink in the Tunisian culture in Mazara del Vallo. See the ruins of Selinunte and Agrigento before setting fire to it all on the slopes of Mt Etna. This is one of the greatest places on the planet to experience life.
• Sardinia – another island where 2 weeks is hardly enough. The bets pork I have ever eaten was here. The most dramatic contrast in life and landscape exists from the interior mountains to the sea only 1 hour away. Buy a knife, drink wines from vines older than the state of Alaska, and dip it all up with crispy flat-bread and the charming sounds of the local dialects. Sardinia is an Italy few see beyond the glitzy port towns. Get inside the island and you get inside another century. Take a boat there. Flying is boring and being on the open Mediterranean is a real high. Cagliari, Orgosolo, Orosei, Alghero, and Sassari offer the visitor a different view of the world in each stop.
• Puglia/Basilicata – I like to eat well and without blowing my entire bank account. I like to ride bikes through 1000 year old olive groves. I like grilled meats, pizza, and local beers. I like erudite nightlife and funky old towns. Puglia has it all. From the baroque of Lecce to the Sassi of Matera in Basilcata there is more to do and see along these southern regions than any guide-book can express.

These are my Italy rules expanded and I hope you continue to follow my Italian adventures.

I’d love it if you took a look at my Pinterest board. You see, I’ve only just started it and am already becoming quite addicted. I’d like to see your pins too! You can even follow me if you like!

http://pinterest.com/jumentouspong/

Yesterday Dana Lundon (awesome radio personality who I stalk because she has cats!) made a comment online that implored others not to share photos of people who were physically affected by the bombing at the Boston Marathon (i.e. missing limbs, etc.). I thought, “People are dumb and should know better”. Then I remembered a sign someone posted in the women’s bathroom at a company I worked at several years ago: “Kindly wash your hands before leaving the bathroom…and it’s ridiculous a sign like this has to be POSTED at all.” Grown adults have to remind other grown adults to clean themselves after they pee.

Stellar. Worthy of a Pee Award statue (little gold plated urinal?).

The New York Times would be a recipient of such an award.

I was in line at *cough*-bucks this morning, and while I waited for my turn at the counter I checked out the mugs and thermo-mugs on the wall. As I fought the urge to buy more coffee paraphernalia the New York Times caught my eye. The front page had a color photo of a woman who clearly had been a victim of one of the bombs that went off at the Boston Marathon. There were two men who were photographed helping her.

The picture virtually swallowed the front page.

I felt great sorrow for the woman on the front page. You realize that’s the picture she’s going to be associated with for the next year? It’ll be the picture she’s associated with when the Boston Marathon gears up for 2014, 2015, 2016, and so on.

Nobody should ever have to be remembered for any tragedy in such a way.

Rich Kidd is known as a rapper that’s been making music for years, but he’s also a producer that is growing to be better known and respected. This free album is a culmination of skills that he’s able to bring to the rap game, while painting a different perspective that inner city folks from different areas can relate to (Bom Bom brought the Scarborough out of me). SYKE was a track that I saw Rich Kidd perform last year at a Stalley show and I knew it was going to be big from that point on – I wasn’t wrong about that. The production is solid all the way around, and the stories do hit home in more ways than one. I hope that people start to take notice on Rich Kidd. My only question for him is: “No Tona on the album though?!” Download (here) & Enjoy.

That’s My Word & It STiXX

Cathedral – Mazzara del Valo

The Italy Rules are my set of guidelines for the first-time and infrequent Italy traveler. I have traveled to, lived, and worked in Italy frequently over the past 20 years. In this time I evolved from a curious tourist to hardened, salty veteran of the trials, travails, and pitfalls of one of the world’s most visited countries. One usually dreams of Italy for years before finally setting their foot into the proverbial boot. The dream usually crashes in much less time. This post is really for the traveler who has not been deep into the Amazon or climbed to base camps in Nepal. This post is for those of you who enjoy modern conveniences, large bathrooms, and the amenities of a comfortable Western life. For the most part, I am you. I love my big bed, my central heat and air, and my very fast Wi-Fi connection. However, Italy is reason enough for me forego these luxuries for a few weeks or months out of every year.

One of my dearest friends is half American and half German. He is the model of organization and efficiency. He said to me just the other night that one of the reasons he loves Italy is because it is chaos. Yes, he loved the chaos, and if you have any hope of really embracing la vita Italiana you better be ready to embrace chaos as well. I am 100% confident there will be detractors of my post, and let them come. The information I am going to share with you here is well won. I have been down many paths of serious consternation in Italy and if you listen to me, you can likely avoid most of these, and perhaps even enjoy a bit the ones you cannot avoid.

Now, without further ado, I give you, The Italy Rules:

1. Do NOT Over-Schedule – Italians typically accomplish about 4 things per day in their lives and have a damn fine time getting from 1 to 4. Do not attempt to do more than the locals do and you will be happy. Here is what an exceptional first 2 days in Italy look like:

Day 1 – Arrive in Rome – Meet your guide (you will be 100% happier than you can imagine if you hire a personal guide) Check in Hotel or Apt – (away from sites at least 10 min walk)- Have long lunch – see 1 site – have cocktails – eat dinner

Day 2 – have good coffee outside of hotel and nowhere near any sites – go to first site of day (perhaps the Vatican) – have very long lunch – go to another site (maybe the Borghese gallery) – walk around eating gelato at a few places or get another coffee – rest for a bit – have cocktails (called aperitivo and usually includes little snacks and is best taken out on some street-side cafe but not in Piazza Navona, or Camp dei Fiori – go over to Monti and enjoy a glass of wine at one of the many little wine bars in that hood) – have an evening stroll in your finest travel threads – eat a wonderful dinner at around 9 PM – you won’t starve if you had a proper aperitivo , and you won’t look like British granny arriving too early.

2. Do NOT Over-Travel - You may think you can do all of Italy in 2 weeks, but you cannot. You may think you must see all you can because you may not come back again to Italy. If you rush from town to town, hang around tourists and touristy places, and eat shitty tourist food you may indeed not ever come back. Here is my itinerary suggestion for the first-time Italy traveler.

2 Weeks – if you can’t go for two weeks, go somewhere else and save Italy for when you can make a real commitment. Italy requires commitment

Arrive Rome – follow above plan…Rome is 4 days at a minimum including arrival day so let’s say 5 in total counting departure day

Florence – Now, I don’t love Florence, but there are things that must be seen and frankly, if I say skip it, I will get more hate mail than I care to read. Take the train from Rome and spend 2 nights in Florence. Make sure to book any museums, churches, and touristic sites in advance. I have no time to give you links to all this, and half the fun of travel is planning to me, so Google how to do it, and do it. Waiting in line sucks no matter where you are. Waiting in line on an expensive Italian vacation is a hell that would make Dante cringe. Hit a couple of great sites in Florence on Day 2 then get yourself a car and drive to…

Wine Country! – Real Tuscany happens in the hills. I would take 2-3 days to do Chianti (Radda and Panazano) - Montalcino and Pienza – San Gimignano – spend 1 day exploring each of these options (do not rush and make sure to eat well)

Bologna/Parma – go here and eat all the classics like Ravioli, Tortellini, Prosciutto, Parmigiano, and Balsamic – great towns, easy to drive in and out, and not nearly the number of foreign tourists (1-2 days)

Venice – I really love things about Venice but you MUST stay away from the central tourist areas – you MUST go to the islands (take the early ferries so you can get back to Venice by 2PM lunch and avoid paying for expensive island food) See the sites as early as they open, then wander around enjoying your day while the hordes crowd around eating shitty ice cream and wearing horrible clothes. Eat lots of seafood, drink loads of wine in the wine bars everyday before dinner. Stare at the wonders of water travel before flying home.

This is in my opinion an aggressive itinerary. Any more stuff than this and you will hate it. If you plan to return to Italy then just do Rome 6 days Florence 2 Siena 2 – Tuscan Wine Country 4

10 Things to Know and Myths busted

1. Pizza in Rome is an anytime meal (lunch and snack hours best). Pizza south of Rome is generally eaten only at dinner as the ovens are not fired up until evening. There are some Rome pizzerias that serve only at night but those serve whole round pizzas. The tasty square kind served throughout the day by the slice are fun to mix and match. Order by weight and eat on the go.

2. You do not have to order every course in a restaurant. Order what you want to eat. Be adventurous. Look around you and order things you see on the tables. Pointing works if your Italian is non-existent.

3. Breakfast in Italy is not hearty unless you are staying at a nice hotel or agriturismo. If you love breakfast (like me) buy some meat and cheese at the store and shove it down before leaving your hotel each day. Then order coffee and a pastry like everyone else. (you need not order food to enjoy a great coffee if you prefer to skip the sweets)

4. Do everything you can to make sure your own telephone works in Italy. Set up an international plan on your phone and get lots of texts and data. Getting an Italian phone can be done, but visits to the phone store waste a ton of time. Use your US phone and budget the extra $100 bucks it may add to your bill

5. Pack lightly – Italy is a small country with lots of small spaces. I can offer suggestions how to pack if you ask me directly. However, for this piece I will simply say if you bring too much to Italy, you will hate yourself, and old ladies on public transportation will hate you! My travel friends and I compete on who can bring the least shit on a trip. It’s a worthy competition.

6 Hire Guides – expats, especially ones with blogs about food, wine, and life in Italy are wonderful. I can suggest guides for many regions and a little investment will go a long way to your overall success as a first-time Italy traveler.

7. Plan heavily but be flexible – Do your research and have contingencies if something sucks. If you hate Rome, leave early. If you love Radda in Chianti and want to stay an extra day..stay! An old friend always said “never leave a good party hoping the next one might be better” if the place you are is stealing your heart, then let it be stolen.

8. Cab drivers in Rome suck…really bad! use the buses, the metro, and the trains. Walk if you can and have time (and you should). If you must use a cab make sure and ask them the fare in advance…which also sucks. Driving in Rome is also pure unadulterated hell and should be avoided.

9. Italians are not circus animals and they do not want to do tricks for you. Don’t ask them to twirl pizza, throw pasta against a wall, or sing some fucking folk song for your listening pleasure. Keeping this in mind, Italians can be entitled, lazy, and intentionally vague. The fact is that all people are people and generally, people prefer to do things in their own way. Respect this and yourself. Don’t give or take shit.

9. Try not to dress badly, but you do not have to wear a dress or suit everywhere. Italians frequently wear ugly clothes and have bad hair like we do, they just have their own ways to do it. Hipster glasses are standard and t-shirts are common among many. However, looking like an extra from Duck Dynasty is not cool. Somewhere between Mad Men, Anderson Cooper, and Honey boo-boo should suffice.

10. Don’t spit, put your feet on things, go barefoot in public (or really ever outside of the beach), flip anyone off, or try to buy anyone’s attention in any way at a bar, restaurant, or airport counter.

These are the Italy Rules and you must abide by them. No matter what, you will have moments that are so sublime they will hardly be done justice by your memories, just as you will have days that will just suck. Italy is slow. Italians are less and less hopeful of their country, and the monuments are starting to decay faster than they can be repaired. I believe in all of this that Italy will have its generational renaissance and will continue to be one of the finest collections of art, people, and culture on the planet.

I look forward to your comments.

Here we go with our list.

• Sauntering across a parking lot as if no one is around: First let me say that this does not count for small children or people who have reasons for walking at a slower pace.  It does however cover those folks who clearly have no excuse and decide to take a leisure stroll.  Hey, if you want to stroll leisurely feel free, I don’t know mind that you’re a more relaxed person who takes life in strides and there should probably be more relaxed people in the world.  However, it is quite irritating watching you move at a pace slightly faster than a sloth when I could be on my merry way to work.  If I drop my shoulders in response to sighing, while I look at you, it typically has nothing to do with you, just the speed at which your legs are moving.

• Having to attain the closest parking spot possible: Again, no problems with people who need close parking spots, just those that are lazy.  I’m fairly certain this is what sets my nerves on edge more than anything else when in a parking lot.  I just do not understand why there is the need to find the closest spot possible.  Do your legs not work?  Is it a game?  It is a sense of accomplishment?  It especially drives me nuts when there is an open parking spot and the person in front of me passes it up so they can then STOP and wait for the person 2 spots ahead!  Not only does this seem completely ridiculous, it does not allow me to pull into the space you felt was out of our league.  My thought when it comes to parking is this: If you see a close spot that is open, go ahead and take it.  However, if there are none, park in the first spot you can see.  A little extra walking is good for you.  [Insert snarky comments about current state of human race and how lazy we’ve become.]

• Walking down the middle the driving area: So I’m ready to park my car or maybe I’m preparing to exit the lot.  What happens next is someone exits their car and decides to walk right down the middle of the driving area.  It’s not as if they don’t see you, they just decide that this is where they’re going to walk.  And guess what, it’s your friend from the crosswalk.  Drop shoulders and sigh.

I think people would be amazed to find that other people actually do share the same views and would like to affect some sort of positive change. Things only change through some sort of action. It is up to you to initiate the action rather than waiting for another person ( or time) to. Every person is an activist; only a few have embraced it. Start small. If you don’t like the trash on your block then clean it up. Or go for the whole enchilada on your first attempt. The scale of your activism doesn’t matter… the intent behind it does!

We Are Mighty. Once we, as a collective, realize this….everything will change! An idea is more powerful than you think. All the inventions you see before you started as ideas. All the inventions you will see in future will start off the same. Once you have an idea that moves you (hopefully its full of love) find others to share it with. OR just for it. Go where your heart is telling you to. You’ll get the support you need along the way. Go forth and be an activist. Affect positive change!

I started with my organisation ten years ago as a tele marketing agent. Yes! I was the lady calling people at all hours of the day and night persuading them to buy things they didn’t need or want. At the time my company had no dress code policy and there was no need for me to put much thought into what I wore to work. Jeans and takkies was the order of the day.

I also didn’t pay much attention to how I was viewed by my colleges and superiors. So when I started getting itchy for growth I was totally stunned when I was given feedback on my appearance. How was what I looked like and what I was wearing going to impact on my ability to do my job well or prove that I had what it took to grow to the next level?! To say I was a bit peeved would be an understatement!

With my second application for a promotion declined I had to go back to the drawing board. I had to consider changing my image to fit in with corporate expectations. I wasn’t very happy because I believed and still believe that the skill and knowledge I bring to the table has never been impacted by my physical persona. Put me in a black bag and I can still deliver quality output whatever role I may be placed into. Never the less I had to change how I dressed, mind my p’s and q’s and be constantly aware of my conduct when interacting with senior management. This wasn’t easy. Building strategic relationships was something new especially when I knew I was being judged for what I looked like as much as for my knowledge and skill.

I had to accept that credibility is not only built on what you know but it is also built on first impressions. How people in business perceive you, in the corporate world impacts on career growth and also what opportunities will be afforded to you. Once I made peace with that fact I could separate the different aspects of my personality and I have learned to adapt my behaviour when need be.

I must also mention that when people share with you their thoughts and perceptions about you, take it with a pinch of salt and always consider the source! At work people joke about me being gansta because of where I come from and at home I’m considered a snob. Contradiction yes!! You can’t please everyone all the time. But in order to please myself so I could move forward professionally here’s how I’ve changed how I dress to work.

Basic Blacks for bottoms is a favourite of mine

Cardigans is another good buy.

Black pants a must have for my work wardrobe

Denims are allowed on Fridays but must be dressed up

I simply love Cardigans

I’d be really happy if I could wear jeans and takkies all day everyday and by the time its weekend I’m happy to kick off my heels but like the saying goes look good, feel good and to that my contribution is do good!

Until next time be good, if not don’t get caught!

As I was reminiscing on these days and months and years, I began to ponder the wonders of college. I remember someone telling me before I left for school: “Your college years will prepare you for the real world.” Well, fast forward to after graduation and in that first job, the general consensus was: “College is the best way ever to hide from the real world.”

So,I’ve decided to compile a list of the reason how college is not like the real world at all:

1. Your friends live down the hall, down the street, or are just a quick 5 minute walk/drive: This was one of the best parts about being in college. I know you’re there to learn, but come on you’re making amazing friends too. Anytime you were bored or didn’t feel like studying, bam instant group of people who also felt the same way. Want a midnight milkshake? Great, odds were that a couple other people were always interested.
2. Sleep isn’t that important: So what if you stay up until the early morning hours with your friends drinking that milkshake! You’re 18-22, you can run for hours on smaller amounts of sleep… and still have the energy to go out with friends until the early morning hours again. Oh, and it doesn’t matter if it’s a school night because as soon as you’re done with your lecture you can go ahead and find a quiet corner in the library to take a quick nap; It’s not like you have a boss who’s going to fire you for sleeping on the job.
3. Bills are nowhere near what real world bills are: Sure you have to pay the basics like rent, food, insurance, etc, but it was typically split at least two ways, sometimes more, so you’re living extremely cheap. And you know what, you don’t mind living that way because when you’re 20 it’s pretty great. Plus, it’s a college town so rent is typically somewhat affordable. [I realize this may not be the case anymore, but it was when I was there.]
4. You don’t have to start your day until noon if you don’t want to: If you aren’t a morning person, great, you don’t have to schedule your classes until noon. I never took advantage of this because I’m an early riser, but that also worked out in my favor because I could be done with classes by noon or 1pm. Not many companies/jobs will let you work around your own sleep-in schedule, so college is definitely not like the real world in that sense.
5. You’re sheltered from real world issues: Your life pretty much consists of the topics you’re studying and what your friends did that day.
6. Your work groups consist of other college kids, not people who have been “in the business” for years: When you’re all college kids learning how to do group work and put projects together, everyone is in the same spot. You’re all learning and have a limited knowledge base. Once you’re in the real world you will inevitably encounter the “I’ve got the experience and you’re just a college graduate,” person. It can take a while to work through that to get people to realize you know what you’re doing.
7. You can go anywhere in your pajamas and it doesn’t matter: In fact, so many people went to class in their pj’s that if you were the person who always got ready for the day people would ask you: “Why’d you take the time to get dressed? You’re just sitting in class.” Now for me, I never would have gone to class in pj’s, I’m firmly one of those get ready before you leave the house people. Probably helps that I’m usually up by 6am.

That’s just my short list of reason about why college isn’t a true depictions of how to prepare for the real world. Don’t get me wrong, I learned a lot in college that has been completely invaluable and believe that the experience itself has paid off tenfold. I wouldn’t be where I was today if I hadn’t had the experience. Just sometimes it would be nice if grown-up life was as easy as college.

Photo link of featured image: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:OSU_by_air.jpg

Three Indian engineering students have created Society Harnessing Equipment (S.H.E.), a type of lingerie designed to protect Indian women from the frequent crime of sexual assault.

The lingerie, designed like a nightgown, releases a 3,800-kilovolt shock capable of knocking down assaulters if pressure sensors around the breast and underwear are activated. However, the woman wearing the garment would not be harmed due to protective insulation. The students have also equipped the outfit with a GPS and alert system that contacts police if the pressure sensors go off, allowing them to arrive to the scene quickly.

Rimpi Tripathi, Niladri Basubal and Manisha Mohan created the lingerie after the brutal gang rape of a 23-year-old student on a moving bus in New Delhi last December.

Though the innovative lingerie could be helpful and protect Indian women from sexual assault, it raises the question: Why is sexual violence against women so prevalent?

The invention of this “anti-rape underwear” is a mask to a larger problem affecting 1 in 3 women worldwide. As a Women and Gender Studies major at DePaul University, it both angers and frustrates me that women must resort to literally wearing armor in order to protect themselves from attack. It is a denial of the basic right of security if a woman has to live every day of her life in fear of attack.

In light of Sexual Assault Awareness Month, I raise the question, how do we bring an end to the rape culture that permeates our communities?

One solution is through education on sexual violence in not only college classes but high schools and middle schools. Discussions would lead to an outline of behavior that is not tolerable, and the exploration of the traumatic effects that result from such violence would create an understanding of why it is intolerable as well as lay a foundation of empathy for others.

It is also the responsibility of lawmakers to create regulations that protect women, and it is the responsibility of public officers to enforce these rules, justly punishing culprits. It is not enough to imprison a criminal of sexual violence; they must be educated on the severity of their actions, why it is not acceptable and the lasting effects of their crime rather than wait for their sentence to be completed.

Though the anti-rape underwear is designed for situations where strangers are the assaulters, most of the people that commit crimes of sexual violence know the victim/survivor in some way. In cases like these there is a need for legal consent from both parties when sex is in the equation. Like we saw with the Steubenville rape case, being drunk or unconscious does not mean, “yes,” and it certainly does not make it ok for someone to take advantage of that person. The question of whether both parties are comfortable and agree that sex can happen is a must. Without permission it is indeed, rape.

There must also be a shift in the view of the victim/survivor. Society must protect and support those affected by sexual violence and believe their stories instead of dismissing it as false. According to the U.S. Department of Justice only 54% of instances of sexual violence are reported. We owe it to the brave women and men who have come forward to listen to their stories and take them seriously. Shaming them into silence, telling them they are overreacting and saying they brought it on themselves, especially when alcohol is part of the situation, only dehumanizes them more.

For too long have we been living in a rape culture and far too many have suffered from the physical and emotional pain of sexual violence. It is not enough to armor oneself, but dialogue and education must continue to dismantle the house of oppression that is sexual violence.

Saving Emma the Land Rover 58 miles per week and bringing a world of joy to my little life, I am proud to introduce Tallulah. Tallulah is a Raleigh Pioneer, ladies road bicycle. She came from Alan, who sells second hand bicycles from his shed, and should last me ‘a good 50 or 60 years’.

I loathe cyclists.

When I am driving and they ignorantly ride 17,562 abreast, when they disregard right of way, when they scare the bejesus out of a 2yr old horse I am riding and when they don’t reply when I say hello I get infuriated. In their STUPID Lycra outfits, thinking they look like Bradley Wiggins; let me tell you, fatty, you don’t! Incidentally, it was a Lycra clad unmentionable that punched my dog, repeatedly, for chasing chickens…nice chap.

Why should I then take up a sport that causes me so much daily aggravation? Let me describe the difference between my sort of leisure biking and that of the road-racing rambunctious riders. My ride to work is on a “sit up and beg” ladies bicycle, with half a dozen eggs strapped to the back to deliver on the way. I jingle my bell and greet the villagers ‘Good Morning’, I indicate with furious clarity at junctions and imitate Miss Hubbard rather than Mr Armstrong.

I have been arriving at work in glorious mood, stress free and grinning at the quiet countryside that I have been able to spend just a little bit longer in that morning. I have time to think about my day and I am feeling actively energised as a result.

I am just eagerly awaiting the arrival of my wicker basket for the front…

“Spring, you are such a tease. Let me know when you’re ready to commit and we’ll talk.”

Seriously, spring is a tease!

The boughs of this tree are weighed down with snow

Last week it was 19c that’s about 67f in American!

Her tweet made me laugh – mostly at myself and my own frustration with a winter that seems to be lasting longer than ever.

Waiting for Spring

I have been waiting for spring since February!

The truth is, winter isn’t lasting longer than any other year and I feel this way every year.

Get a grip Diana, after all you live in Canada – why are you surprised?

Well enough is enough.

I need to get out there – with or without spring!

So on Monday in -10c weather

8th Street SW, Mount Royal area

I dressed in layers

put on a hat

grabbed my way-too-expensive down-filled coat and with camera in hand set out for a walk.

Once out there I realized it wasn’t so bad after all.

The sun was shining brightly, causing me to squint and my legs were happy to be moving.

What else I’m waiting for?

Not a fan of waiting at the best of times, my frustration with winter got me to thinking about what else I might be waiting for and why?

If you’ve ever been in a place where you were doing exactly what you knew you should be doing

It used to be said that Calgary has 2 seasons: construction and winter. Lately the two just seem to blend into each other…

and something happened that closed that chapter in your life, you may be able to relate to what I’m about to tell you next.

For the last 2 1/2 years I’ve been waiting out a different kind of winter

waiting for inspiration

waiting for that next opportunity to present itself

waiting for a different kind of spring.

Could it be that it’s time to just stop waiting?

Could it be that I simply need to act and just go do what I am meant to do?

~

But here’s the thing.

I’m afraid.

The Calgary Tower on the right was the tallest building when it was built in the late 60′s. It makes me chuckle to think now that when one is on the observation deck, one can also look up at offices as well as looking down at the folks below.

I have self-doubt.

I could fail and make a fool of myself.

Maybe I’m too old to start something new.

These are not easy things for me to admit.

Even thinking these thoughts (never mind writing them here) makes me feel weak.

Yet I am often encouraging others to take hold of their dreams

to trust their inner-voice

believe in themselves and act accordingly.

It’s time for me to swallow my fears and take my own advice.

I thought items were knocking around in my pocket so I stopped. The knocking continued and I looked up to see a woodpecker and snapped this photo. But I can’t see it in the photo, can you?

Enough is enough.

I need to dress in the layers of my years of experience and believe that they have merit.

I need to adorn my head with all the knowledge I’ve gleaned and believe that it is useful.

I need to cover myself with all the skills I’ve picked up and the value I can bring to my community.

And just walk out that door and do it.

I bet I will find it’s not that bad out there

and when I take that first step in faith

my heart and spirit will just be happy to be soaring again.

I hadn’t been walking (a favourite pastime of mine) because I’ve been waiting for spring.

But on Monday I stopped waiting, dressed for the challenge, went out and enjoyed a long walk.

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

Is there something you haven’t been doing because [insert reason]?

     I hope you like it, and whatever your interpretation(s) may be, I would be interested in hearing.

Jake.

The American Caesar

The American Caesar

And the king shall bow

before the commoners

as his reign comes down

in ruin.

*

Pleading for mercy

not for act or deed,

but for ignorance

of the uprising brewin’.

*

His court he will damn

and the ministers name

for the king and the queen

know not any shame.

*

And still arrogant to the end

he’ll refute all, but small blames.

And fiddle to the end

and laugh at the flames.

***

Jack Downing

June 2012

Copyright© Jack Downing, aka Jake @poemsandponderings.wordpress.com. All rights reserved. Contents may not be reprinted or disseminated in any manner without the expressed written consent of the author. JRD 4/9/13

http://conservativehome.blogs.com/torydiary/2007/05/is_mrs_t_the_gr.html

Following on from my ‘Ijust want to be a Power Ranger’ post, I wanted to pay tribute to Margaret Thatcher 1925-2013. Comments on social media range from ‘Ding Dong, the witch is dead’ to ‘RIP Maggie, NAILS!’ & ‘an inspiration to many’. Whether you loved her or loathed her, you cannot deny that she was a true patriot and felt this country running through her veins. From inspiring ‘corner shop economics’, that we would do well to live by nowadays, to dealing with IRA terrorism and combat in the Faulklands she dealt with hard times day in and day out.

Bringing the housewife and politician together, facing and learning from her mistakes she taught a young Jumentous girl to dream big whilst being humble. I learnt that hard work reaps the best rewards, I learnt never to give up and most of all I learnt to take pride in everything I did.

She faced doubt and criticism every step of the way but she still made it. An iron-strong will and a heart that wept for the pain of the world existed in this politician like none before her; and none since.  She was working for the country on beliefs she learnt at home, not pursuing prowess and power, she pulled us forward as a nation and accepted her imperfections, never lied about them. The online obituaries list her achievements, downfalls and moral beliefs; I cannot think of a better role model for a young, female mind. She thought about the future, not gratification of the here and now.  I am proud to say I grew up loving my Prime Minister and I hope that her death has come at a time when people can read about her life and learn something about themselves.

“A best friend is someone who, when they don’t understand, they still understand.”