In my opinion, the best way to follow me here, is also the way I want you to approach sex:  Relax, don’t think too much! Just feel, sense and breathe. Let my words sink into that deeper part of you that knows intuitively how to use what I’m saying for the most pleasure, the greatest joy and your highest good.

When we relax deeply enough, when we drop inward into who we truly are, we will experience our inherent well being and power. Without having to do anything to get there, when we allow space and silence, we will feel the benevolent, joyful, loving nature of the universe.

Sex is a great way to help us relax into that effortless natural state and so is meditation. Both paths are equally valid. These postings are about the first path, about learning how to allow our sexual nature to take us to the divine.

Excerpted from “Sex for the Soul,” an Audio Home Study Course on Tantric Sex

My back’s aching – not aching actually,  scratching. Not even scratching; it’s itching, but slightly. It’s not as if I have to tear down my clothes and rip through the itching area. My back never allows me to do so nor does it give me a chance to do so either.

I was thinking about the times I spent with my ex-boyfriend (Harry). Oh he did not scratch my back, but he did excite me no end. I was so happy being with him. Of course, had it not been for my break-up before I met Harry, I would have still been with him. I broke up with Harry because I realized I wasn’t over the ass I had dated before him.

Today, as I sat in the bus and listened to a Philharmonic Orchestra playing Christmas carols, I began to drift back in time to the days Harry and I were dating. We would meet at places in Bandra and we did coochie-coo like rabbits.

Sigh! I miss intimacy. I miss it like hell. It’s the one thing that I hankered after for so long and when it did come my way, because I was in a skewed state of mind, I dumped it and how! I called Harry and broke up with him on the phone!

Silly of me, really, but then I have reason to say that this is just one of the numerous silly deeds I have participated in in the 30 years of my life here on Earth.

The Secret Names Of Women

are as magnets or aphrodisiacs to me.
The flush and rush
of intimacy
new found first kiss
makes my skin
electric.
I need the gentle nipple erection ecstasy
new born beneath my thumb
to decipher the vast NOW
of desire and joy.

And then comes that moment
when She relaxes and enjoys Herself.
Wholly and Holy
Goddess and Woman
Maiden and Mistress
all women and herself only.
In that moment
I know her secret name.
And sometimes
so does she.

Do you know that pumpkin seeds are a male sexual tonic, even the aroma of pumpkin pie can increase blood flow by 40% to a man’s genitals.

To Do: Make this Thanksgiving a memorable one by including some love foods for your lover.  A seafood appetizer can release sex hormones like testosterone in men and women. A chocolate  dessert is a favorite for women because it triggers a substance which releases naturally when you are in love called Phenylethylamine. Don’t forget the pumpkin pie for him, to put his sex drive into high gear.  Now that’s what I call a happy Thanksgiving.

For more information on love foods, check out the certified course on Aphrodisiacs at:

http://loveologyuniversity.com/ShortCourseDetails.aspx?CourseID=32&a_aid=litekepr

Click here to subscribe to Dr Ava’s Quickies and to get your copy of 52 Sizzling Sex Secrets.

In Zen Buddhism, all students, no matter how many years they’ve been meditating and studying, are asked to come to each and every practice with a beginners mind. I encourage you to come to this page with a beginners mind also, as if you were hearing the topics of sex, love, passion and ecstasy for the first time. This way, some entirely new perspectives and possibilities may open up for you.

Can you imagine your whole “being” as ecstatic?  Consistent great sex in a long term or short term relationship is possible. Sex that takes you to heaven and even opens the pearly gates for you is within reach… If you can’t wait for these daily postings, feel free to jump ahead and check out my Sex for the Soul CD package.

Excerpted from “Sex for the Soul,” an Audio Home Study Course on Tantric Sex

(originally posted on May 18, 2009)

An extremely common mentality, and one that I entertained myself for a period, is that sex, making out, or anything similar is “just fun” and of course it won’t have long-term consequences.

And yet, how is it that after you sleep with someone, even just a casual, one-night stand, you have the memory of that person in your mind months later? Even though God forgives, heals, purifies us from all unrighteousness when we turn to him (I Jn 1:8,9), there are still memories.

Sex unites more than simply two bodies; it unites two souls somehow. I am understanding a little better now that sex is really something very good that God– in his WISDOM –created for a purpose. God desires for married couples to have a close unity, intimacy and trust.

Something this awesome is a dim reflection of the unity between God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit — which is certainly not a sexual unity, but nevertheless is a perfect, untainted unity and unbreakable love between the three, who are actually ONE. pretty cool.

If we are children of God, we should be striving to be as close to God as we can possibly get, right here and right now in this present life, anticipating the day when we will be with him in person. In short, we SHOULD strive for intimacy, but we need to be careful that our first love is Christ himself, our second love can be a spouse perhaps.

Sexual intimacy with strangers,”friends with benefits”, boyfriend/girlfriend, or fiance, should not be pursued at all because it will have emotional consequences and will distract us from the One we should be getting close to in the first place: Jesus. If he went so far as to die for us, I think this is the person who cares more than anyone else can.

Not a good day, really. First thing this morning I had an appointment with my doctor, requested because I thought maybe I want to try anti-depressants again, to combat the naturally increased levels of anxiety associated with my job. The doctor ended up seeing me half an hour late, as he always does, causing a great deal of stress as I would have to be at work within the hour. He only gave me a few minutes, just like he always does, in which I had to persuade him that my problem really isn’t just a case of mild newcomer nerves. I got a prescription for three months’ worth of citalopram, which I was on last year. I had thought it might be useful to try something else, something that won’t cause all the unpleasant side effects that put me off citalopram before, but since the doctor was clearly too busy for a proper discussion, I had to make do with what I was given. I really can’t wait to move next month so that I can sign up with a new doctor.

When I was finally out of the doctor’s surgery I rushed home to take the first tablet in the course, before I had to go to work. Maybe it’s an alcoholic thing to do, rushing home in a frenzy to take a pill in the hope that I might feel better, rather than leaving it for tomorrow. With some extra serotonin in my system, I think I felt OK on the tube to Notting Hill this morning. I certainly didn’t feel horrible like I have every morning for the past two weeks. That can probably be put down to the expectation effect, rather than any real chemical action. SSRI’s such as citalopram take weeks to have any real effect, which is how they are not habit-forming.

At work I had three hours of customer service to look forward to – after yesterday’s ‘experience’ they seem to think I’m ready to be let loose on the public properly. I logged on to find about 300 customer e-mail enquiries that urgently needed responding to. The same guy who sat with me yesterday at the helpdesk sat with me again today, offering help when it was needed. I got the impression after an hour that I should be starting to feel more confident in answering the enquiries on my own. My supervisor began to sound tired and bored with my endless requests for help. After two hours, I noticed him rolling his eyes nearly every time I spoke. I began to panic, horrified by the thought that I was being a burden, and I made a few mistakes, choosing to go ahead and respond to enquiries alone rather than risk further eye-rolling by asking for more help.

After three hours I had to take a break just to calm down. I went out to Starbucks, sat down and stuffed my face with sugar. My hands were shaking; I was sure that I’d finally proved myself to be the failure that I always thought I was in their eyes. I’d reduced someone who was supposed to be helping me to eye-rolling boredom. In his eyes, I could be a bit slow, at best. Stupid, at worst. The thought of being seen as stupid is absolutely horrifying to me. I don’t know why.

After using up my paid break I returned to the office where I was allowed to get on with the other part of my job, the bit that I’ve got used to over the past two weeks, where I have to update the website with retailer offers. I’m comfortable with this bit of the job: it’s got nothing to do with customer service, it’s just typing words and numbers into a live website. Of course, two weeks ago I was in a similar place with this part of the job to the place where I am now with the new part. I thought I’d never understand any of it two weeks ago. Now it’s almost a piece of cake. If I can get my head around that, surely I can understand anything. Well, that’s what I’m hoping.

At 5pm Melanie announced to the office that our thanksgiving dinner was ready and waiting for us downstairs. I didn’t know why the whole company was choosing to go to a thanksgiving party, until I got downstairs and saw all the alcohol. About fifty fresh bottles of various descriptions sat on a table in the corner of the room, and the thirty or so employees of the company were fighting their way over to the table to lay claim to their share of the night’s alcoholic refreshment. Melanie and some of the other directors had cooked turkey; with all the booze distracting everyone the food was almost a second thought at this point. I put some meat and potatoes on a paper plate and went to sit on the only free seat in the corner of the room. It’s a really bad space for a party: only one large sofa and a few swivel chairs had to accommodate thirty people with their dinner and drinks. From the moment I sat down I knew I wasn’t enjoying myself. Everyone separated off into their little cliques where they were bound to stay for the rest of the night. Melanie, who I might have felt comfortable chatting to, was busy serving up the food in the kitchen and didn’t look as if she would be mingling any time soon. I forced the food down my throat in three minutes and decided I’d had enough of the party. I had to leave. No one was really interested in socialising: it was all about getting pissed as quickly as possible. I had hoped that tonight would finally be my opportunity to meet the other people in the company, get to know some faces and names outside of the small, uncomfortable little team that I always work in. Alas, I didn’t stand a chance of making a single friend.

I wasn’t the first person to sneak out early tonight. One of the guys who trained with me three weeks ago was out of the door like a shot after forcing his food down in a similar way to me. At least I didn’t have to be the first to leave. Just five minutes of the event was more than enough for me. It’s not the fear of drinking that puts me off these kinds of things: it’s the fear of being around drunk people. I can’t handle it.

As soon as I left I was full of doubts once again about the future of my job. Someone was bound to notice my sudden departure. They could be thinking: what an ungrateful arse, staying only long enough to eat our food without bothering to talk to anyone! With the added pressure of the extra work that I am now being expected to do every day, I’m really fearful about the whole thing tonight. I went straight to the gay step 11 meeting from Notting Hill – I desperately needed to be in a safe place with safe people. There I managed to share about what had just happened, though it was an incredibly busy meeting and I don’t usually manage to jump in when there are so many others needing to speak. I’m glad I was able to go to the meeting tonight, and I’m really glad I was able to talk about all the things going through my mind. As a consequence I felt much better, for a while. People came up to share with me their experiences of dreaded office parties, how we all find it impossible to deal with so-called ‘normal’ people in the real world where getting drunk is the highest priority for most. The trouble with socialising in the ‘real’ world is that it’s all so meaningless. None of the conversation that I heard tonight was of any real interest to me; a few years ago it wouldn’t have mattered as I would have been too wasted to care. Today I can’t ignore the fact that most of what these people want to talk about is utter shit! I don’t want to be judgmental, it’s just the way British society works. As long as you can get really drunk, nothing else matters.

People in recovery may be returning to a relationship or trying to rediscover the passion of earlier times. This article from Readers Digest may be of help.

You and your partner can rediscover intimacy and pleasure with these tips.…

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

Permalink

You can’t help but fall victim to slang in your life. Phrases that come shooting into the vernacular and within five minutes are already passe, we’re constantly looking for the new, fresh way to sound hip & cool. Personally, I’m very jive so these phrases tend to bug the bejesus out of me. Back in the 90s we were treated to many million mini Alicia Silverstones. Years later, girls still refer to Clueless as a “classic”, but you don’t hear “As if” at all anymore.

The latest offender is something that grates at my soul and is worse than nails on a chalkboard to me.

Obvi

Now there are plenty of other offenders but, obvi just annoys me to no end. Apparently in this text,blog, twit-a-minute world we live in we don’t have the time for “ously”.  Probs and the like also bug me, but there is something so immature, so childish….and not like high-school childish, not even jr high school childish, I’m talking middle-school childish… about this. It reeks of the obnoxiousness of tween girls and Miley Cyrus. To me obvi is so obno annoy.

Let’s bring a little extra intimacy and closeness to couples this holiday weekend. Do you want to find a way to make your relationship more intimate? Do you want to find ways for your love making to last longer? This is the show for you.

Sex Drive Radio with Dr Ava Cadell – Celebrity Sexpert Dr Ava answers questions about love, relationships, intimacy and sex. Today’s “Hot Topic” is Tantric Sex. Her celebrity guest is Mariel Hemingway. This show is not appropriate for under age listeners.

Listen anytime Wednesday or Thursday by clicking the link below – http://www.blogtalkradio.com/sexdrive/2009/08/30/sex-drive–tantric-sex–dr-ava-cadell-celebrity-se

Learn more about Tantric Sex Learn At Home Course -

http://www.youtube.com/loveologytv#p/c/F3E66B1458F71DC4/5/aowLBRjtv-g

For much more information, visit http://www.cli.gs/tantriccourse

This Course Is For You If:
•You want to Discover What Tantric Sex Is Exactly and How it Can Enhance Your Sex Life
•You want to Learn About the Venus Butterfly Technique that Results in Multiple Orgasms for Women
•You want to Know How Men Can Separate Orgasm from Ejaculation
•You want to Have a More Spiritual Connection with Your Lover

When you are reading my daily posts, you may be touched in ways that make you feel things. You may possibly feel sad, vulnerable or even a little upset. Please allow for that, it means that deep layers of your being are getting activated, movement is happening! Welcome it, for a lot of power and joy are hidden in these places of discomfort. Let yourself feel, that’s how new & beautiful things emerge…
I will be painting the picture of what’s possible & in moments it may feel like that’s far away from where you are. That doesn’t mean that wherever you are is wrong. You are a beautiful being on an exciting journey, exactly where you need to be right now, in no way deficient. All is well. I am here to take you in the direction of more love, joy and pleasure, no matter where you’ve been or whether you’re 18 or 80.

I’ve come to notice that some very important building blocks, insights and practices are missing from many of the currently available sacred sex teachings. These contemporary adaptations of the ancient Tantric and Taoist teachings and other spiritual sex practices don’t’ always give the full picture and has lead to much misunderstanding and many dead ends for people. I am here to change that…

Excerpted from “Sex for the Soul,” an Audio Home Study Course on Tantric Sex

I am not perfect and this time of year usually magnifies those flaws.

Between Thanksgiving (at our house) and Christmas we have both kids birthdays and the anniversary of the death of our second son on top of all of the usual holiday “stuff”.  I am one of those people  who tend to shut down when things get to be too much and that happened just a couple of days ago.  My multitasking was not going as well as I would have liked and I was starting to drop those balls that I typically juggle so well.

It all came to a head on Sunday night when Tony said the dreaded words “I think we need to talk”.  Now, I don’t care who you are hearing those words is usually not a good thing and this was one of those times.  We sat on the couch, I didn’t even want to look at him, as we attempted to work our way through what was heavy on my heart.  My first reaction was to sit there, in silence, take in what he had to say, parrot back to him the “right” answers and move on.  But you know what, this time I fought that urge, I resisted being flippant and I took the time to listen, truly listen to the pain that I was causing my husband and my marriage.  I allowed myself to be vulnerable to my husband and I deeply appreciated his sentiment that he was not going to “give up on me”-ironic because that had been the topic of Pastor Harry’s sermon just that morning.

Why do I share this with you?  Because on the outside you can’t always tell what is going on with someone or with their marriage.  Because even good relationships hit bumps in the road.  Because you can learn new behaviors to overcome the ones that have been a problem in the past.  Because when you are married to someone who is not willing to give up on you, you have to make the extra effort to grow that marriage, to make it truly extraordinary.

What do you and your spouse need to talk about today?

Alisa

“His pleasure is not in the strength of the horse, nor his delight in the legs of a man; the Lord delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love.” (Psalm 147:10-11 NIV)

I have been in ministry off and on throughout my Christian life and I love it. The hardest time for me is when reluctantly God puts me on the shelf, when both door and window are tightly closed. My thoughts continue to go to the same place, “I should be doing something.” But what?

It is my mistake to believe that activity equals accomplishment; this verse affirms that. His delight is not in my “doing” but in my devotion to Him. I believe that it is during these quiet times that my roots grow deeper as I seek Him for Him alone.

He knows my body tires very quickly and I tend to push past its bounds so He leads me beside quiet waters and restores my soul just as the 23rd psalm says. It becomes about our love relationship, the intimacy we have from spending times together rather than works.

As people with chronic illness our hope remains in His unfailing love. Our bodies don’t work as we would like and our “doing” has been greatly diminished but He continues to delight or, according to the Hebrew, “be well pleased” with us. What a blessing!

It is our heart and mind that needs to be refreshed with this word. Laying down what we think pleases God and embracing what He is now saying to me and you.

Do not fear inactivity, but in those times allow the Lord’s love to be a balm that invades your body, soul and spirit so that when He again calls, you might go out again changed, more like Him because we have laid down the “doing” and embraced Him.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Catherine Barron lives in Sheridan, Montana. She is semi retired and loves to read, write and enjoy her latest hobby, outdoor photography, although her first love will always be the word of God. She considers her fibromyalgia a formidable unrelenting teacher.

Don’t just live together… make love together! Many long term couples have allowed their sex life to gradually fade away, resigning themselves to a life of companionship with occasional sex. They may even feel they’ve come to a total impasse & have given up all together. There are so many ways to bring the spark & passion back to their partnership, no matter how long they’ve been together, or what age they are.

All the pleasure, love, intimacy, grace, ecstasy, spiritual union and awakening that you can possibly imagine is indeed available to you. Yes! You can make even more love and deepen your experience in this world of ecstasy! Interested? Click here to learn more!

Excerpted from “Sex for the Soul,” an Audio Home Study Course on Tantric Sex

We are vain!
Nothing wrong with bit of vanity,, it’s why you do your hair…or don’t
Sexual attraction is the very core of our universe.
We look and feel good to please ourselves, others, and because it is an innate part of who we are.
We are never to be ashamed of our beauty, bodies, sensual, sexual selves…
There is intimacy in the Bible, “Books of Songs”, in the Koran, and Torah, Veda and many more…
So follow the beauty of your make up and don’t let society and the devil, people, or any one tell you are not breathing!…
I realized that to be happy is to accept all of who I am and not t let anything that is normal and the reason we even exist be shameful…..
Be beautiful!, Be sexual, Be you…Loving and sexualspiritualsynergy!Grege

The biggest problem long-distance spouses often face is how

to keep emotional intimacy alive when they are separated.

If you are in a long-distance marriage, you are probably already using email and the telephone as much as possible to stay in touch. But what else can you do to stay connected with your partner and not lose that special bond between you?

One suggestion is to take the extra time to also send “snail

mail” greeting cards, letters, and postcards when possible.

Buy an assortment of cards when you have a chance, and that

will make it easier to send out one or two cards each week.

Vary the type of cards that you send–some romantic, some

funny. You could also send postcards to add variety and show scenes of the geographic area where you are working.

In your letters and emails, don’t only talk about what activities you’ve been involved in, but be sure to share your feelings about what’s going on in your life. Ask feeling-related questions, such as “Do you ever worry that one day we’ll have been married 20 years and we’ll discover that we don’t really know each other?” Also share memories and experiences from childhood and the years before you met.

Write your spouse a letter telling her (or him)what you love about her,what attracted you to her, what you admire about her, and why you want to stay married to her. Before you send it to her, make a copy for yourself and read it once a day to remind

yourself of all the positives about your spouse. Ask her to do

the same for you.

Look for ways to create reminders that will trigger thoughts of

each other when you’re apart. For example, you might

consider naming a star for your spouse at the International Star Registry (www.starregistry.com). Then, each starry night, you will both feel connected as you look for “your star.”

You might come up with some other symbols to trigger your

thoughts, such as agreeing to think of each other every time

you see a certain type of bird. Or pick a car with special

meaning and think of each other every time you see a red

Camaro, for example. Perhaps you will both agree to listen to

a certain song on a CD before you go to sleep each night,

knowing the other person is doing the same thing.

Brainstorm about ways you can feel connected even when

you’re not talking on the phone or emailing each other. Mail

your husband (or wife) a tape of yourself reading a love poem or sweet letter you have written to him. Send small surprise gifts when you can. They don’t have to be expensive; they just need to show that you’re thinking of him.

You could order gifts of gourmet candy, nuts, popcorn,

flowers, or other items from the Internet. Or you could give a

magazine subscription to your spouse so she (or he) will think of you each time the publication arrives. Another idea is to send her a new CD that you think she’ll like or a paperback book.

Consider creating your own web site where you can post

photos you both take with a digital camera. The pictures could

show scenes from your life apart and also pictures from the

times you are together. Over time, this would document your

history as well as your current life as a couple. One site that

provides free web hosting for family web sites is

http://www.myfamily.com.

Other ideas include having a print shop like Kinko’s put a

photograph of you and your spouse on coffee mugs, or having a

photograph put on a T-shirt or sweatshirt for each of you. If

you have some common interests in reading or listening to

audio books, pick a book to read or listen to at the same time

and then discuss it as you go along.

Put on your creative thinking cap and experiment to see what

works best for the two of you. By using your imagination, you

can deepen your emotional connection with your spouse, even

though you’re physically separated by thousands of miles.

Nancy J. Wasson, Ph.D., is co-author of Keep Your Marriage: What to Do When Your Spouse Says “I don’t love you anymore!” The e-book is available at http://www.KeepYourMarriage.com , where you can also sign up for the free Keep Your Marriage Internet Magazine. Contact Nancy at Nancy@KeepYourMarriage.com.

Visit : Shoes Forum Shopping Fahrrad Bekleidung Billig Kaufen Sweatshirt Hoodies

Sex is promoted in popular culture as a means to pleasure, excite, and please your partner and these are very good reasons for having sex. It’s just that the media inadvertently promotes the more mechanistic, sex as the norm. There are other forms that are much greater & enjoyable… 

Excerpted from “Sex for the Soul,” an Audio Home Study Course on Tantric Sex

© Ahndraya Parlato, Untitled, from the series Inscape, 2003-2008

© Ahndraya Parlato, Untitled, from the series Inscape, 2003-2008

“I am interested in how we structure our personal worlds, in how we imbue them with a sense of direction, purpose, and security when, in fact, we can actually control very few things. The idea that we’re not working towards anything, that completion and wholeness are unattainable fictions, and that chaos rules, is a scary possibility to consider. The world can unravel at any moment – no matter how perfect your yard is.

Our feelings are elusive. It may take us years to know why we do certain things, or feel certain ways. Because of this, we’re often operating without reason. We believe we know why we’re doing what we do, but, in fact, we’re blind. We’re magicians. My reality is an illusion that I’ve created. I may recognize it as an illusion, or I may not; I may continue to accept it, and to call it reality, thus rendering it real. Or it may vanish before me like the fleeting chimera it was.

I want to show the world in a way that recognizes the fragility of our constructions, that accepts, and perhaps welcomes the discovery of a torn veneer. My subjects accept the failure of order; they sense their own inability to control the world, and yet, they continue to try. Their world is marked by both a loss of comfort and the search for new and unusual methods of consolation, despite the impossibility of complete consolation.”

Personnal Statement

More of Ahndraya’s work here

Some things really get us excited. Having a baby is always an exciting time. You want to tell the world. As they grow and reach major milestones, we love to share with our friends, even strangers you meet at the grocery store.

Some things we don’t like talking about. We feel uncomfortable. Our faith in Christ is sometimes difficult to talk about. We have it, but we don’t know how to express it. Sex is another one of those things we just don’t talk about very much. It makes most of us uncomfortable. In fact people that talk openly and honestly about sex make us uncomfortable. So I will make most of you uncomfortable at some point this morning.

The truth is, what I am about to share with you God has been working in my heart as I have been working on my marriage relationship with my wife, as I make those strides to enter the winter of my married life with as much excitement as I did when we were first together. Some of the things I will discuss God had already revealed to me before I read “Sacred Marriage” Others, He has really opened my eyes to.

My “talk” with you this morning comes from a firm conviction that God is Lord of every aspect of our life. And because God is Lord of every aspect, He wants to be involved in everything we do. Everything. So let’s ask Him to open our hearts and eyes to how marvelous He is, and how marvelous a creation we are. Let’s do this before we have the dreaded “TALK”.

I. Communion With the Shekinah Glory

The Ark of the Testimony was constructed with two cherubim of hammered gold, who faced each other and touched wings. In this joining of the two, Exodus 25:22 records, “There, above the cover between the two cherubim that are over the ark of the Testimony, I (God) will meet with you”.

God’s presence “between the cherubim” became a very popular Old Testament image.

• 1 Samuel 4:4 “The Lord Almighty, who is enthroned between the cherubim”
• Psalm 80:1 “Hear us, O Shepherd of Israel…you who sit enthroned between the cherubim”
• Isaiah 37:16 “O Lord Almighty, God of Israel, enthroned between the cherubim”.
• Hebrews 9:5 “Above the ark were the cherubim of the Glory”

The Glory of God comes to us as the two beings are being joined. God dwells in the midst of this coming together.

Indeed, the basis of communion with God is always His glory. At the mercy seat we have fellowship with God. We are shadowed by the cherubim of glory. There is the Glory of God because the shed blood has made our forgiveness possible. Through the Blood God can show mercy without violating His glory. He can commune with man without violating himself.

When I commune with God at His mercy seat, it is not on the precious blood I gaze, but on His glory. The veil has been stripped away. Sinful man can behold the glory of God. The Strict Law of God has met the atoning blood of Jesus Christ. We are at one and at peace with this awesome Holy God.

Most of our holiest moments have been alone with God. We simply do not know how to enter into this intimacy with others. I can count on two hands times when I have gazed on the Glory of God in communion with others. This is very, very sad, because Jesus revealed a very important truth that the church has forgotten, and marriages have forgotten. We may know it, but we rarely experience it.

Jesus said true Christianity is meant to be shared in intimacy with God. In Matt 18:19-20 Christ offered this glimpse at the Glory of God:

Again I say unto you, that if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.

Most of us quote this verse and believe it is a “formula” for getting God to do what we want. One of us will pray, another will say “Yes, I agree” and we expect God to do what we ask. But we miss the true meaning of this verse because we miss what Jesus was revealing:

1. You must be gathered “synagō” – Someone has led you together, it is passive, an outside force has brought you together.

2. You must be in “symphōneō”—in harmony, as an orchestra of many instruments come together to play the same note. This implies and requires an intimacy of heart and spirit.

There will be rare times where God brings people together because of a shared pain or trial, and through mutual love for each other and a mutual reaching to God, you pray together in complete trust and complete faith for what God is going to do.

Most of the time when we come together in pray, someone is wondering how long this will go on, someone will be thinking about food, someone will be thinking ‘God doesn’t care about this’ and so there is no moving together in symphony. This type of prayer is no formula; it is a work of the Holy Spirit. Just as the 120 disciples prayed for weeks before Pentecost, it took that long for them to finally come together in total agreement.

You may think these verses only apply to spiritual times. But God is Lord of every aspect of our life. God has designed marriage to have certain forces that draw us together in symphony, in harmony. Why can’t God be in those times? Why do we relegate Him to the church only? Do we think God closes His eyes when we have sex? I’ve got news for you… If God knows when you join yourself to a prostitute or to someone other than your spouse (as Paul warned the Corinthians), He certainly is there when you join yourself to your husband or wife!

Underneath our coming together is the belief in the Power of the Name of Jesus Christ. We are brought together through His Name!

The family that enjoys a deep abiding presence of Jesus Christ is precisely because the husband and wife have invited Jesus into the deeper parts of their marriage. They are not coming together to pool resources, save money, escape loneliness, or merely gain an outlet for sexual desires. They have joined their lives to deepen their faith in God. They see God in everything they do-even when it comes to their sexual relationship.

Even if you did not get married with this reason in mind, you can this day decide to maintain your marriage on that basis; Marriage can then become a favorable funnel to direct God’s presence into your daily life.

II. Sex from Different Perspectives

“Our bodies are not barriers to grace. If we could truly accept this, then we would know God even in the ambiguous delights of our sexuality.” (Evelyn & James Whitehead)

Now church is the last place you expect to hear about sex. Depending upon your age and your parents attitude, your idea of sex can range from dirty and disgusting, something you have to do, to its no big deal.

Understand that regardless of how you view sex, as a Christian, you need to have a Biblical understanding of sex and why God made us sexual beings.

A. Jewish View

To the Jews, sex was a gift from God whereby they fulfilled the Abrahamic Covenant to become as numerous as the stars. Sex was reserved between a man and his wife. Sex was important for the family to multiply and extend the name of God in this world.

Sex was not only about procreation. In the Misnah, Jewish wives were given three fundamental rights – food, clothing and the right of “onah” – sexual intercourse apart from the duty of procreation.

Jewish Rabbi Nahmanides (Rabbi Moses ben Nachman Girondi),wrote “Iggeret ha-Kodesh (אגרת הקודש – The Holy Epistle)” in the 13^th century (some dispute it). He proclaimed sex as a mystical meeting with God.

“Through the act [of intercourse] they become partners with God in the act of creation. This is the mystery of what the sages said, ‘When a man unites with his wife in holiness, the Shekinah is between them in the mystery of man and woman.” The breadth of this statement is sobering when you consider this Shekinah glory is the same presence Moses experienced when God met with him face-to-face (Exodus 24:15-18).”

He went on to write:

“We the possessors of the Holy Torah believe that God, may He be praised, created all, as His wisdom decreed, and did not create anything ugly or shameful. For if sexual intercourse was repulsive, then the reproductive organs are also repulsive…If the reproductive organs are repulsive, how did the Creator fashion something blemished? If that were so, we should find that His deeds were not perfect.” (From “The Holy Epistle,” attributed to Nahmanides)

The Torah uses the term yada—“to know”—to indicate a sexual relationship. Sex is thus considered more than a mere biological act; it involves intimate knowledge shared by two human beings.

To most Jews, sex was a gift from God whereby they could have a sacred family and propagate the world for the Glory of Jehovah. Sex was good, and nothing to be ashamed of as long as it was done it properly between a husband and wife.

B. Christian View

Christians came along, and no longer was the emphasis on a family, but the emphasis was on your individual faith in God. Through some of Paul’s writings and later the teachings of the early church fathers and the Catholic Church, celibacy was equated with “holiness or Godliness”. Sex was viewed as a totally fleshly act that would draw your heart away from God. Avoiding sex was seen as fostering a deeper faith.

At our Bible College the unwritten law for the married students was not to have sex Saturday night because it would interfere with your “spiritual” preparation for Sunday.

We must ask ourselves: If God created us as sexual beings, then he meant us to enjoy sex within the context of His guidelines. And if marriage is designed to make us like God, then how can we reconcile the Holy with something so fleshly? We must realize that God’s eyes are not closed when a married couple enjoys each other sexually!

C. God’s View

God made our bodies, and with them, some amazing sensations. While the male sexual organ has multiple functions, the female clitoris has just one—sexual pleasure. By design, God created a bodily organ that has no other purpose than to provide women with sexual ecstasy. This was God’s idea. And God called every bit of his creation “very good” – Genesis 1:31.

Betsy Ricucci has approached this issue from a feminine perspective: “Within the context of covenant love and mutual service, intimacy should be exhilarating  according to what Solomon wrote in Proverbs 5:19.

III. Sex as a Spiritual Discipline

God views sex as a discipline that can draw us into His presence.

God has placed Himself in earthen vessels through His Son Jesus Christ. God wants to show us How to use our sexuality as a spiritual discipline-to integrate our flesh and faith.

It is my desire that we can move past the negative connotations and preconceptions of sex and examine how it is possible for this fleshly experience to sharpen our spiritual sensitivities. If sex is going to turn us toward God and our spouse, it is essential that we examine sex with the understanding that

God uses Marriage and every aspect of it to make us Holy, like Jesus Christ.

God’s Word teaches us three things about sex:

• Sex is good by design but there are things more important than sex
• Sex allows the experience of pleasure but pleasure can never become the idol of our existence
• Sex seasons our lives but will never fully nourish our souls.

For Sexuality to become a spiritual discipline we must change our views in three areas:

• Adopt a Sacred View of Sex in Marriage
• Adopt a Sacred Emotional View of Sex in Marriage
• Adopt a Sacred View of Your Spouse

A. A Sacred View of Sex in Marriage

1.   Sex is a Mirror of our Desire and Passion for God

2.   If sex is to be a communing experience with the Shekinah of God, then it must be confined to its righteous place-between a man and a woman united in a marriage covenant before God.

Anything else is a corruption of what God intended sex to be.

Now sex by itself can be abused in a marriage relationship. If God is to be in our sexual relationship, it must embrace the components of our relationship with God-servant hood and righteous desire. Within those bookends, sex can become a powerful force for our growth spiritually.

If we are to see the positive power of sex in our marriage relationship, we must move past the hurt, shame, guilt and angst that you may have because of things you have seen and heard about outside the marriage relationship. Homosexuality, premarital sex, fantasy-laden masturbation, hard-core pornography-none of that constitutes “sex” as I am defining here.

Redefine sex as it was when Adam “knew” Eve and began to populate the world. Think of sex only within these terms and then let’s ask God to reveal Himself to you within your marriage through the gift of sexual pleasure.

God does not turn His eyes from our bedrooms. Neither should we turn our eyes from God when we share intimate moments with our spouse.

To see sex as a way of spiritual discipline, of drawing our hearts and our marriages closer to Him, it is imperative that we adopt God’s view of sexuality. God made flesh, and when God made our flesh, he created some amazing sensations. While the male sexual organ has multiple functions, the female clitoris has only one function-sexual pleasure. By design, God created a bodily organ that has no other purpose than to provide women with sexual ecstasy. This wasn’t Satan’s idea, it was God’s. And God called every bit of his creation “very good” (Gen 1:31)

Advice to Wives:

In ‘Love that Lasts’, Betty Ricucci says “Believe it or not, we glorify God by cultivating a sexual desire for our husbands and by welcoming their sexual desire for us”.

Wives, you may desire your husband’s to be more Godly, and God has given you a power to open up to your husband that God is in your bedroom. What better time to talk to your husband about God than afterwards. Shock him sometime by saying, “Glory to God”. Shock him even further by saying thank you for making me feel close to my heavenly Father.

Advice to Husbands:

I’m not going to place the entire burden for glorifying God on the wives.

The real burden is upon the husbands; because we must learn to love our wives the way Christ loved the church. His love meant death, and our proper sexual love for our wife must include death to what we want, and becoming a servant to the needs of our wives. We are the ones who need the most educating; because we are the ones God said need to dwell with our wives according to knowledge, the things we learn.

3.   Sex is to be a Shared Spiritual Experience

To bring Christ into your marriage bed, you must be brought together in His Name and you must be agreed in your spirit as to seeing Jesus honored by your sexual union.

B.  A Sacred Emotional  View Of Sex In Marriage

We often come into our marriage with sexual baggage-emotions and lusts that are corrupted by television shows and movies we have seen pictures we have viewed, bad experiences in past relationships, and bad experiences with family members. God’s Word says it is possible to bring His Divine Nature into our marriage bed, and to escape the corruption that is in the world through lust and evil desires.

2 Peter 1:4 (NKJV) by which have been given to us exceedingly great and precious promises, that through these you may be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.

One FOUNDATIONAL promise we must bring into our marriage bed is:

1 Thessalonians 5:18 (KJV) In everything give thanks (eucharisto – express gratitude): for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.

God commands us to bring gratitude into every situation we face, and if He commanded it, there is the promise of His presence.

Gratitude Must Replace Guilt

In order for Sex to become a spiritual experience, we must incorporate gratitude into our sexual relationship.

1. Practice Thanking God For What Sex Involves.

• i.e.; a wife could pray explicitly but in all holiness “God, thank you that it feels enticing when my husband caresses my breasts.”
• Couples can even pray together, thanking God for the pleasure surrounding the act of marital consummation.
• This simple act of thanksgiving can sanctify an act that all-too-many Christians divorce from their spiritual life with God.
• God designed sex to feel good, so why not thank Him?

2. Remove The Roadblocks That Hinder You From Seeing Sex As God Designed It.

• See that Sex in marriage is honorable before God
• If your history contains sexual abuse, you may need counseling to help gain the proper perspective on sex.
• Our past can make us feel that sex is evil or at best to be tolerated, when in fact God means it to be exhilarating, passionate and a means of drawing our hearts to each other as well as Him.
• Scripture in Proverbs 5:19 says our sexual intimacy should be exhilarating and even intoxicating. “Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.”
• Gratitude to God is essential; otherwise the powerful feelings associated with sex will cause us to focus on ourselves.

3. Deal with the Idolatry Of Sex And Obsessive Guilt Over Sex

• Cause us to focus on ourselves
• Gratitude turns our focus to God.
• We insult God when we do not accept the holiness of sex and pleasure.
• If the pain of a fast can reveal God to you, why not the pleasure of something God designed for you?

Once we have reevaluated our Theology and our emotional attitudes, we also need to reconsider our expectations-the type of intimacy we are seeking.

C.  A Sacred View Of Your Spouse

I realize to some you will think this concept perverse. But please see it in light of God’s Holy Word.

1. Your Spouse Is Also Your Christian Brother Or Sister In Christ

• You share an eternal bond that will outlive your bond as husband and wife.
• Your marriage should transcend mere sexuality by emphasizing your fellowship with God.
• You are not just sexual partners.
• The instinctive longing you have for each other becomes a real expression of lives united with God.

2. Sex must not be seen as merely a Physical Experience.

Andy Stanley in his “Twisted Truth” series exposes the lie of Satan that sex is simply an ‘activity’ or an ‘experience’. God designed sex to be the gateway into deep intimacy between husband and wife, intimacy that can include Him as well. When we engage in sex as an activity before marriage and even during marriage, it will destroy your capacity for intimacy with each other.

3. Our bodies are the Temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor 6:19)

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (ESV) Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

• Husband and wives are joining together with sanctified bodies
• God is present in our bodies through His Holy Spirit.

4. Your Body Belongs to God.

If we can use the image of our bodies as a Temple of God to abstain from sin, then we can use the same image to be drawn into God’s presence as a husband and wife are drawn into each other.

5. God’s Temple==God’s Presence

• Not sacrilege to enjoy God’s presence as you enjoy each other sexually!
• God is present in the temple of your body.
• His Shekinah Glory is there in your bedroom

Otto Piper: “We have come together in God, called by Him, creating a family, serving Him, and we are now expressing, physically, the spiritual truth that he has created-we are no longer two but one!

6. This Spiritual Component Of Sex Is Key To Deliverance From Sexual Perversions.

• When sex is reduced to pleasure alone, no wife can possibly meet a husband’s expectation.
• Pleasure will always be fleeting.
• Pleasure focus will always want more and different to find satisfaction that is fleeting
• A Wife cannot be reinventing herself to satisfy the pleasure focus of her husband.
• Plastic surgery, implants will never be enough.
• We must find the fulfillment that comes from spiritually meaningful sex, looking for God and spiritual fellowship beneath the pleasure.

7. Every Hunger That Entices Us In The Flesh Is An Exploitation That Can Be Better Met By God.

• Godly sex is married sex
• Illicit sex is spiritual junk food, sweet and tasty, but eventually bad for you.

8. Sex Must Be Seen As BOTH A Physical And Spiritual Experience Of Intimacy.

From Gary Thomas: “To embrace fully marital sexuality and all that God designed it for, couples must bring their Christianity into bed and break down the wall between their physical and spiritual intimacy. Sex is about physical touch, to be sure, but it’s about far more than physical touch. It’s about what’s going on inside us. Developing a fulfilling sex life means I concern myself more with bringing generosity and service to bed than with bringing a washboard abdomen. It means I see my wife as a holy temple of God, not just as a tantalizing human body. It even means that sex becomes a form of physical prayer—a picture of a heavenly intimacy that rivals the Shekinah glory of old.

Our God, who is spirit (John 4:24), can be found behind the very physical panting, sweating, and pleasurable entangling of limbs and body parts. He doesn’t turn away. He wants us to run into sex, but to do so with his presence, priorities, and virtues marking our pursuit. If we experience sex in this way, we’ll be transformed in the marriage bed every bit as much as we’re transformed on our knees in prayer.”

IV. Practical Advice to Deal with the Power of Sex

A. Our Sex Drive is a Physiological Drive

• Not a true physical need like food
• You can survive life without a single orgasm
• Predictable, Physical and emotional
• This physical drive which seems like a need is there by God’s design.
• Without this physiological drive many couples would slowly drift apart into their independent worlds
• We are by nature selfish being who hide from each other.
• Maintaining a steady pursuit toward and empathy for another human being goes against our sinful egocentric bent.
• Reminder of our need to keep falling toward our wife, and parallels our need to keep falling toward God.

B. Place Your Sex Drive under the Lordship of the Holy Spirit

• Focus on the spouse we have, and not the spouse we want.

C. Value the Things That God Values

• Inner adorning
• Acceptance of the inevitability of change
• Character of Time

D. Give What You Have

• We have only one body designed by Creator God
• Accept imperfections and give yourself wholeheartedly

E.  Accept That Our Bodies Need To Connect

• God designed us with testosterone and hormones
• We have physical urges because of our chemical makeup
• Sometimes you bite your tongue because you need to connect with your spouse

F. Our Need for Sex Can Work to Groom our Character

• Men learn tenderness and empathy
• Wives may use physical intimacy to help capture their husbands interests emotionally

G. Our sex drive literally calls us out of ourselves and into another

H. Realize the Need for Passion

• Nothing brings out passion in a marriage like sex
• The most distinctive people in the Bible – David, Joseph, Daniel, Abraham, Elijah all had an outspoken passion for God.
• Their passions connected them to God, helped them to see Him in their life.
• Just as Passion is healthy when directed toward God, sexual fulfillment in a marriage is a healthy passion,
• The more passionate we become in one area of our life, the more passionate we tend to be about many other things.
• A man who is passionate about his wife will be passionate about his children, his work, and his love for God.
• If a man is frustrated or defeated or facing other sexual problems, there will likely be a cloud over his work, his faith and even his fellowship with his children and friends. Often he will be selfish and self-absorbed
• You don’t always have to think spiritual thoughts when enjoying sex.
  • At times it will have spiritual overtones
  • Other times it will be purely physical
  • Both are holy within marriage

V. Life is to be a Celebration

God is worthy of Infinite Celebration!

As Jesus Christ entered the City of David, his disciples lined the way and showered him with palm fronds. They were cheering, shouting:  ”Hosanna to the Son of David! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord! Hosanna in the highest!” Matthew 21:9 (ESV)

Luke 19:39-40 (HCSB) Some of the Pharisees from the crowd told Him, “Teacher, rebuke your disciples.” He answered, “I tell you, if they were to keep silent, the stones would cry out!”

This phrase “Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord” is very important, so important as Jesus wept over the City of Jerusalem, and said that he often wanted to gather them to himself as a mother hen gathers her chicks, he said:

For I tell you, you will not see me again, until you say, ‘Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord.’ ” Matthew 23:39 (ESV)

Jesus Christ Is In Heaven Looking Down At Your Marriage.

He sees the problems; he sees the rooms of your heart that you have hidden from your spouse. He knows your sexual hang ups. He is saying: just invite me into your marriage, into your bedroom. Don’t see sex as simply an experience of relief or pleasure or conquest or duty or means of control.

Rejoice in His ownership of your body and see Him dwelling in this temple of flesh. Shout out “Blessed is my husband who comes in the name of the Lord. Blessed is my wife who comes in the name of the Lord” Shout out Hosanna in the Highest!

Instead of lighting scented candles in your bedroom to set the mood, let me encourage you to get some stones and put them on the nightstand, in a frame on the wall. Let them remind you to see sex as a means of shouting out praises to Jesus Christ who lives within you and is present in your bedroom. If you don’t shout out praises, someday God will let you listen in as the Stones cry out to Him!

Let’s bring the Glory of God into our bedrooms!

PowerPoint Slides:

Sacred Marriage Series 5 – Sex and the Shekinah Glory