"The Cav"

Yesterday I hopped on a train and spent the day wondering around Antwerp.  Visited the Antwerp zoo.  Sat on a terrace at the Grote Markt drinking beer.  Wondered down to the river Scheldt.  Over all, it was a great day. To top it off, it was sunny.

After a week, I am still running on EST and last night, I crawled into bed last night around 2AM. A couple of stiff drinks of Jack Daniels, 15mg of Zopiclone , some iPhone Scrabble, and the final episode of season 1 of the Sopranos’ I fell asleep.  Not only did I fall asleep with minimal effort, I slept for around 10 to 11 hours.  So if anything, I am making deposits in the sleep bank for when I get back home.

I did have some interesting dreams last night.  As I write hopefully more will come back to me.  I dreamed that she passed away again.  Another accident.  My reaction was that she died already so why would I worry about it happening again.  However, I then realized that I could have spent time with her between the last accident and this one, so where was she and where was I in that time?  I had a hard time with that.  I was also pre-occupied with forcing someone to fill out paperwork properly before they could go somewhere.  The person was a girl, and I was questioning her on the accuracy of her answers on her first attempt at the paperwork.  I was quite vocal with her, she was frustrated, but anxious to go where she wanted to go.  I was under the clock as well, torn between finishing the paperwork properly and something else.  I woke up crying half way through the dream at some point.

Well, onto the topic at hand.   Wine.  I have been lucky on this trip that I have been given the opportunity to drink some of the most wonderful bottles of wine including some wonderfully rich and flavorful French wines from St. Emilion and Bordeaux, and some great Italian wines including a Chianti, and a Brunello.
Now I have to say that I love wine, and there are a million quotations that I could pull out here, and I probably will fine one I love the best and will post it somewhere on this entry to give the page some colour.  However what I did want to convey was my opinion on wine.

First of all, all wine is to taste.  I don’t believe that arguing the merits of one type of wine over another is a worthwhile endeavor.   Red vs. White, French vs. California, Merlot vs. Pino Noir, I have no interest in that.  If you wish to discuss why you like one type of wine over another and the reasons you enjoy it, then I love that sort of conversation and lets have it over a bottle of your favorite.  Drinking wine is such a rewarding experience and it stimulates everyone’s senses differently.  So, my number one rule is a rule I learned from my father: If you like the wine, then that means it’s a good wine, so drink it.

Secondly, my opinion is, one must pair wine with food.  To drink wine on its own for the purpose of simply intoxicating ones self is a complete waste.  Food enhances the wine drinking experience an easy ten fold.  (I do want to interdict here with one important point.  This comment is coming from someone who has been intoxicated to the point of nearly loosing all control over bodily functions countless times on drinking only wine. ) I have this opinion because I have tasted wines that have not agreed with my pallet at all; but when paired with the right food, the wine changes and the taste suddenly becomes a very memorable experience.

Why would someone drink wine for the soul purpose of getting drunk?  There are so many other options out there: American whiskeys on the rocks; Canadian rye with coke, ginger, or water; Cocktails of all sorts.  I should stop here, because I am drifting into another area that I could write for a page or so which is the art of mixing drinks.  So on that I will sum up.

Medicate, intoxicate, obliterate…that’s where I am today, tired of being tired, tired of not being able to sleep, tired of the pain, tired of life, my life, my life right now. I miss my old life. I miss my freedoms.

Tomorrow will be day three of my PT, part of me wants to cancel, but I already had to cancel Monday. I know I need it, but I have issues with the cost of each visit. I also have been in more pain when I’m done. I don’t like that part of it.

I need a pedicure…can’t reach my toes to do it. See it’s the little things that get to me. A pedicure should feel like a treat, not something else I have to add to my budget.

I guess I really am on a roll of negativity so I’m gonna quit while I am ahead. I have some research to do….some stupid questions to ask and a refill to go and get.

BTW…(click →) here’s the other blog where I shamelessly make my plea for donations to my fix-me-up fund. Check it out if you are feeling generous, pass it along to someone who wants to adopt an old brokendownbeatenupbylifeoldhag.

The whispers of the air,
Voice the magnificent Nature’s galore,
I wonder if I could fly,
With the clouds I could vie,
As high as waves I could jump,
Playing with moon’s effect have fun,
& wish to reach the moon through rays of the sun.

(5th july 2010)

Credit: Jazmine*’s Flickr

DBSK/TVXQ maybe in limbo but Xiah Junsu who I previously knew for his angelic face, amazing voice and crazy infectious laugh is on a very clear road called Destiny.

With the release of the Vid for his new single “Intoxicate,” he has cast aside his adorable boyish image for that of a smouldering hot Man whose smexiness is reaching Rain levels!!!

It really has to be seen to be believed! So for your viewing pleasure:

Thanks Stellena for this info!

dress – Michael Stars
shoes – Elizabeth and James
socks- i can’t remember

i like this outfit. i like my mom’s heels the best i must say. i think im gonna steal the dress. i love my new lifestyle as the robber for my mother’s closet. =/ my mom has the best stuff. she taught me HOW to be stylish. i really owe it all to my mother. (:

good clubbing outfit, no? i well, if i was 21 and i could sleep at 2AM and get drunk with piña coladas and pomegranate martinis then yes, this would be the perfect outfit.
(i would leave out the hangover part.) but alas, i am only 13.

that sucks.

Mystic eyes, uneven hair

An intoxicated growing lily

Biyon!

Arlington,VA

I shape you with my fingertips and two-dollar bills.

Wet with sweat, you are sex in motion,

and I lose myself in the flashing lights and the throbbing music.

The smell of you, the taste of you, and the touch of you intoxicate me.

I want to stay drunk forever.

Forever, please, forever.