The police often question him just because they find him interesting.  He’s been known to cure narcolepsy just by walking into a room.  His reputation is expanding faster than the universe.  He once had an awkward moment, just to see how it feels.  His legend precedes him the way lightning precedes thunder.  His charm is so contagious vaccines have been created for it.  His personality is so magnetic he is unable to carry credit cards.  Even his enemies list him as their emergency contact number.  People hang on his every word, even the prepositions.  He lives vicariously through himself. He is… The Most Interesting Man in the World.

Young men often hold vision in mind of the kind of men they wish to become.  The vision is of impeccability; of positive masculine qualities such as adventurousness, and self-assuredness.  Characters such as Indiana Jones, James Bond, Jason Bourne, Ethan Hunt, Bruce Wayne, and Zorba the Greek are examples.  Recently a new character has emerged; one that sets an attainable level of greatness for males to aspire to: The Most Interesting Man in the World.  The character, played by actor Jonathan Goldsmith, embodies qualities like poise, experience, and intrigue.  Examining The most Interesting Man in the World we can discover how to implement his qualities into our life, to the benefit of all those we encounter.

1. Poise:  The Most Interesting Man in the World (MIMitW) maintains a dignified, self-confident manner.  He is firm, but not aggressive.  For example when endorsing his product he says “I do not always drink beer, but when I do I prefer…”  His mannerism communicates that he is clear about is own tastes, and allows you your own as well.  Its merely a dignified suggestion.  In conversation he maintains his own space, and does not dominate the exchange.  Around him conversation flow freely and openly, because all are able to contribute.  Poise suggests a centered, grounded individual.  When driving the MIMitW feels so centered its as if the world is moving underneath his tires like a trackball, but he understands the world does not revolve around him.  He never ran with the bulls in Pamplona, the bulls ran with him.
2. Intrigue:  The MIMitW arouses curiosity and interest through unusual, new, or otherwise compelling qualities.  His living space is an extension of himself: He keeps particularly inspiring or fascinating objects  around.  They are not necessarily expensive, but all have a captivating story behind them.  Most notable is his world map.  It contains pins in all the places he has ever traveled.  This instantly invites dialogue among anyone who has also been to those places.  You need not follow his lead exactly.  Perhaps your travel experiences are few at the moment.  In that case use two different colors of  push-pin; one denoting the places you have traveled, the other signifying place you would like to go in the future.  Guests will surely volunteer travel advice.  The MIMitW utilizes Peacocking:  To attract mates male peacocks use brightly colored and distinctive plumage.  This strategy, when used by humans to spark interaction, is called Peacocking.  This can be overstated, such as wearing a giant-sized Doctor Seuss hat, however the MIMitW would never stoop to such garishness.  He prefers sporting a full-beard when most men go clean shaven, or perhaps wearing the first three buttons on his shirt undone to a formal event.
3. Creativity:  He never says something tastes like chicken.  Not even chicken.  The MIMitW always seeks to express himself creatively.  Instead of saying something tastes like chicken, he would say: “This dish has a savory flavor with an underlying robustness, not overpowering, similar to the Pheasant I tried while visiting friends in Belgium.”  When expressing anger he may use the word “peeved,” and he always makes toasts from the heart, never from note cards.  When exposed to a new art form he pretends he has been doing it his whole life, and never makes excuses about being a beginner.  He looks to integrate seemingly separate concepts, such as applying principles of foreplay to story telling.
4. Levity:  On a two party system:  The after-party is the one you want to attend.  On Happy Hour:  Happy Hour is the hour after everyone from happy hour has left.  The MIMitW is a master of humor.  He has a few favorite quips he uses semi-regularly (such as “I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy,”) but creates most material on the spot.  He never laughs at his own jokes, though will occasionally find the laughter of others contagious.  He utilizes the Dead-pan Delivery:  Telling jokes with a straight face to increase their humorousness.  Actively discovering what different individuals find funny allows the MIMitW to connect with people from all walks of life, from wealthy yacht owners, to dice playing Polynesians.  He is often seen laughing raucously with whomever he is with.
5. Activity:  To lead an interesting life one must do what they love while actively exploring the novel.  This is especially true in choosing leisure activities.  The MIMitW enjoys activities like deep sea fishing, snooker, big wave surfing, participating in NASA reasearch, Jai Alai, noctural exploration, Kendo, boating, arm wrestling, parachuting, dice games, dog-sledding, snorkeling, martial arts, treasure hunting, traveling, and falconry.  When choosing a leisure pursuit, ensure that it tests your abilities in some specific way.  Intellect, steadfastness, courage, agility, strength, or determination are qualities that you could challenge.  Jai Alai tests agility, big wave surfing tests steadfastness… you can figure the rest out yourself.
6. Strength:  He’s a lover not a fighter, but he’s also a fighter so don’t get any ideas…  He could disarm you with his looks or his hands.  Either way.  Musculo-skeletal strength is an important skill to develop.  It increases vitality, resistance to injury, physical stamina, mental fortitude, and develops the physique.  The MIMitW knows this.  Also, strength is practical when faced with a risky situation, such as getting mugged in Buenos Aires, or evacuating a fellow mountaineer after an accident.  To build strength one can use weights, bodyweight exercises like yoga or gymnastics, and martial arts.  Finding novel ways to train (like Parkour) ads to one’s intrigue.  Instead of maximizing the weight on your bench press, try developing a planche push-up.  The MIMitW likes to develops a few stunts of strength he can use to inspire others at parties.  Examples include bench-pressing two women in chairs, and arm-wrestling.  Other ideas: doing 10 squats on one leg (pistols), handstand push-ups, backflips, or breakdancing.
7. Purpose:  Find out what it is in life that you don’t do well, and then don’t do that thing.  Choose a career that matches your talents, abilities and passions.  Don’t pick something based solely on income.  The last thing the world needs is another unfulfilled lawyer, doctor, or priest.  Read The Zero Hour Work Week (for free) to learn how to match income with passion, ability, and talent.
8. Benevolence:  He’s against cruelty to animals, but isn’t afraid to give a stern warning.  The MIMitW rights wrongs wherever he has the ability.  Perhaps saving a fox from being killed for sport, or releasing a bear from a trap.  This attitude is not restricted to the animal kingdom.  It could mean building houses for impoverished families, helping African villagers receive clean drinking water, or buying a herd of goats for an Andean family.  I’ve heard rumors that the MIMitW has been seen building houses with Jimmy Carter’s Habitat for Humanity troop.
9. Experience:  His beard alone has experienced more than a lesser man’s entire body.  The MIMitW understands the C.S. Lewis quote “Experience: that most brutal of teachers.  But you learn, my God do you learn.”  It is this attitude that is at the core of his philosophy.  The more risks you take, the more you learn.  The more you learn, the more interesting you are.  Adopt this into your own life by taking one calculated risk tomorrow.  Ask an attractive stranger out on a date.  Streak around your block.  Stand up to your boss.  Whatever the outcome you will have a very interesting story to tell in the morning.
10. Integrity:  You cannot buy him.  But occasionally trimmings from his beard come up in auctions…  If he disagrees with you it is because you are wrong.  The MIMitW rarely lies, but never to himself.  Quite often people confine themselves to mediocrity by not being completely honest.  They think “I would be most happy watching TV,” insead of “I would be most happy living my dream of becoming an author.  I must start wiriting now!”  People often cheat themselves out of lasting fullfillment by settling for some fleeting tittlation.  This is dishonesty to self.  You are allowing your blade to rust.  The MIMitW never makes such a compromise, and in doing so keeps his blade, and therefore himself, razor sharp.  This gives him the strength to live his dream, and to tell the truth even when no one is ready to hear it.
11. Commitment:  When he orders a salad, he gets the dressing right there on top of the salad.  Where it belongs.  Where there is no turning back.  One cannot bungee jump by keeping one foot safely on the bridge.  The MIMitW knows this.  Whenever he acts, he act fully, without hesitation or regret.  He knows the parable of the preist who would think about making love to his wife while praying, and think about praying while making love to his wife.  In the preist’s conflict he was poor at both.  When the MIMitW prays, he simply prays.  When he makes love, he simply makes love.  This small secret gives him the edge over mediocre men.

Being the most interesting man in the world is a simple philosophical choice.  While it may seem like egotism to aspire to such a goal, it is not.  Its about choosing to be open to life experience wherever it presents itself.  Do you see a woman you would like to talk to, but are too anxious to approach her?  That anxiety is closing you off from a life experience.  Do your traditional Christian beliefs prevent you from joining in a Sufi mystical dance?  Your rigid belief system is shutting the door of life in your face.  That’s a problem.  From now on make the choice to be open to life experiences.  Remember the Mark Twain quote: “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”  Because that is what being interesting is all about.

To learn more about the Most Interesting Man in the World or play titillating online games visit The Most Interesting Academy.  http://dosequis.com/academy/

Special thanks to Dos Equis (www.dosequis.com)

All quotes in italics.

I can’t resist linking to this provocative list of ’the best movies’ of the Noughties. There will be thousands of such lists over the next seven weeks as we see the decade out, but anyone who knows me just a little bit will know that I would rather argue about films than most other things.

It’s great to see first place taken by Austrian auteur Michael Haneke (for Hidden), and second place by Paul Greengrass (for his two populist Bourne thrillers) – as if to say that both Hollywood and the arthouse can achieve cinematic greatness.

But it’s hard to take the list seriously when one of the worst films of the decade – Bond’s relaunch in Casino Royale – comes in at number eight…

Copyright Columbia Pictures

Salt, the movie that would be fittingly dubbed “Lady Bourne Identity”, has released its first teaser trailer this week. Angelina Jolie stars in this action-packed flick, that seems to be very Bourne-esk.

Jolie knows how to handle action movies, and the solid supporting cast of Liev Schreiber and Chiwetel Ejiofor seem to be capable of handling it just as well.

Have a look and tell me what you think!

LEVIATHAN

Prologue: “Don’t Be A Hero.”

M Street NW
Washington DC
October 17, 4:30pm

“How come I’m always zebra?”

“What’s wrong with zebras?”

“It’s not intimidating. It’s not scary. I’m just a weird horse.”

The four passengers in the white Ford van all fixed hard, angry glares at the driver. Tense silence reigned for a minute; the only sounds filtering through the tinted windows were the occasional honking horn, the smooth hum of the van’s tires over pavement, and the muted throaty growl of the new Ford’s 16 liter engine. Finally the front passenger, a hulking brute of a man with short cropped brown hair and a boxer’s jaw, glanced out the window to hide his frustration and spoke through grit teeth.

“It’s just a goddamn mask.”

The driver threw up his hands in exasperation, his pale face starting to glisten with a sheen of nervous sweat. “Then you wear it! Let me be lion for once!”

“Enough!” The front passenger yelled, slamming a clenched fist into the door and causing the three others spread across two bench seats to jump. “It’s doesn’t matter what animal you are! You can’t change because as soon as you do one of you retards is going to somehow get confused and mess this whole job up! Just shut up! Shut! Up!”

Another few moments of silence passed and the fidgeting men focused on the rhythmic clicking of the turn signal. From the back of the van, a short, bald Hispanic man with a panther tattoo creeping up the side of his neck looked ahead and cleared his throat.

“We’re close,” the Hispanic passenger noted. His companions did not need the reminder; they all knew exactly where they were going and what they were going to do when they got there. Each of them, save the vocal driver, reached under their seats and took out cheap plastic animal masks that could be found at any ninety-nine cent store. From back to front, they all checked the reinforced elastic band and slipped their masks over their anxious faces.

From back to front, the Hispanic man secured a tiger mask over his face. In front of him, two African-American thugs rolled their shoulders and looked down at their laps before putting on bear and shark disguises, their mass-produced plastic crinkling as they adjusted the fit. In front, the angry passenger fixed a pointed glare in the direction of the driver, then put his face into a tan and brown lion mask. Lion let the elastic snap securely on the back of his head in a way that said this was not the man’s first time doing this.

“Two blocks,” Zebra announced, now glancing every other second at his rear view mirrors. Lion did his best not to notice the tic, instead he turned around in his seat to address the others, who had now moved on to preparing heavy-duty canvas duffle bags, dinged and scratched shotguns, a gleaming Glock nine millimeter, and one matte black Uzi that Bear stroked lovingly in the back.

“One more time,” Lion said in an even, calm voice, “Bear and Tiger get the guards. Zebra’s on the clock. Shark and me have got the cash. Once the guards are down, Bear and Tiger, you got crowd control.”

Bear and Tiger nodded as the van took a leisurely right onto a main street. Fifty feet from the intersection, a sleepy Bank of America sat between two vacant lots, its impressive modern glass façade obscured by blinds to keep the bright DC sun out of customers’ and tellers’ eyes. Lion has wondered during the planning stage what idiot had designed a façade that could only really function six hours of the day, but that detail was about to make him a very rich man, so complaining seemed inappropriate. Maybe he would find out who built it and mail him five percent. Sure.

Lion reached over for a sawed off shotgun and slipped two shells into the “Don’t freeze up. They give you lip, you bust some heads. We’re knocking over a bank in the middle of DC, so getting caught’s worse than smoking some asshole. Heroes get dead, you got me?”

Everyone nodded gravely. The van eased to a stop in front of the neighborhood bank and the side door flew open with pent-up energy as the animals charged out of the vehicle. They reached the drab glass and steel doors in seconds, Bear and Tiger barreled straight ahead as Shark held them open and followed right on their heels as they passed the bank’s ATM anteroom and on to the main event.

The Georgetown neighborhood branch had been specifically chosen for its lack of vigilance. With only the odd drifter or drunk college hooligan to handle, the security staff was both small in number and almost criminally complacent. Only one of the two armed guards turned as the doors banged open, and his perturbed expression quickly met the hard polished wooden stock of a shotgun swung with savage speed.

The guard’s partner jumped with alarm as he heard the sickening wet crack of his friend’s jaw separating, but only got as far as reaching down for his weapon before Tiger was on him, wielding his shiny Glock. The butt end of the handgun impacted ferociously with the guard’s forehead, dropping the unfortunate employee as if he were a marionette and his puppeteer had suddenly let go of his strings. The panicked shrieks began immediately, but were hushed by the deafening, echoing roar of Lion’s shotgun firing into the ceiling. Tiny bits of plaster fell and skittered across the marble floor as the leader shoved the wafting twin barrels into a teller’s face. The middle-aged woman’s overdone eye shadow was already running in streaks of blue down her cheeks as she started to cry behind the prison-like steel bars that made up all the tellers’ “windows.”

“Time for the lion’s share,” the homicidal criminal muttered behind his thin plastic snout.

It was now evident that this was not the animals’ first job together, as Bear and Tiger had already disarmed and moved their fallen adversaries into the middle of the bank and corralled the customers into the center as well.

Bear tossed one of the guard’s pistols to Shark as the fish-masked robber shoved a teenage boy in a gray hoodie and jeans roughly to the floor. Shark considered grabbing the boy’s sunglasses that fell out of the boy’s pocket but thought better of it.

Shark examined the huddled mass that he was now in the middle of. The Bank of America’s main floor was a long rectangle, broken up only by small islands of countertops for customers to fill out receipts and pockets of desks and chairs for customer service representatives. Shark had his back to the tellers and faced the long floor to ceiling windows of the bank’s façade. To his right was the entrance, where Zebra had just arrived with additional duffle bags and Bear was keeping watch over the customers. Tiger stood alert on Shark’s left side, twenty feet from the wall and facing the hostages. Shark checked the guard’s weapon for a moment before speaking.

“Stay on the ground and look at the floor! We’re here for the bank’s money, but heroes get dead!”

As if on cue, a sneaky bank employee popped up from underneath his desk behind Tiger’s back. Shark never hesitated as the nervous heroic employee raised his own concealed gun. The bank robber simply shifted his gun slightly to the left and rapidly fired five shots at the would be savior, embedding three bullets in the doomed man’s chest. The man’s white dress shirt started to blossom red as he fell in an awkward stumble into his own office chair. The terrified shrieks now started to mix with sobs, but the grisly scene only seemed to enrage Shark more.

“What did I just say?” The murderer bellowed. Shark sensed motion below him and glanced down at the teenage boy he just shoved to the ground moments ago. In the chaos, the kid had put the hood of his sweatshirt over his head. The bank robber shrugged derisively.

“Pussy,” he taunted under his breath, then turned toward Zebra, who anxiously fiddled with the duffle bags and generally did nothing to help the robbery.

“Zebra!” Shark called across the floor. “Watch these assholes and cover me. I’m gonna get that wannabe’s piece.”

“Cash and guns,” Tiger chuckled as Shark joined him by the bank’s far wall and left Zebra in his place in the middle of the floor. “Best day ever.”

Zebra’s eyes danced around the space with adrenaline-fueled unease and he cursed the lack of peripheral vision in his mask. If he was truly being honest with himself, Zebra was both in complete awe and utterly terrified of Shark’s ability to act without hesitation. The getaway driver tried to scan the room as he had seen Shark do before, taking in where his partners in crime were and the position of hostages and—

Something moved under Zebra’s feet. Rather, Zebra knew something was moving because it was making one of the oddest sounds the bank robber had ever heard. It sounded like winters in Philadelphia when the snow and ice became one hard pack and only steel shovels would defeat the accumulation, a sharp, grating, gritty sound against an unyielding surface. Confused by both the sound and its location, Zebra looked down where a boy, no older than fifteen or sixteen, was lying face down on the ground with his hands by his head.

Except the fingers on those hands had carved out tiny angry furrows like tiny plows in the floor. In the marble floor.

Zebra’s head jerked up and around as he looked for Shark or Lion. “Hey—!” He called out, but that was as far as he got.

The force of the blow against Zebra’s ankle was shocking, the surprise of pain and the immediate loss of balance only received a sucking inhale as the side of the criminal’s face hit the floor hard. Before Zebra could put a thought together, he screamed in agony as a vice-like grip seized his ankles with bone crushing force, followed by the tiny muffled snaps of the man’s ankles giving away.

Zebra’s mask fell off as he was lifted off the ground, revealing in the growing darkness of shock that the previously prone teenager was not only standing, but actually spinning the robber around like a child with a foxtail toy, but the injured man’s legs were the toy’s nylon tail and his head was the attached baseball. Just as quickly as Zebra had hit the ground he felt the grip loosen and give way to the incredibly foreign sensation of hurtling through the air and smashing violently through the bank’s front windows, landing in a broken heap against the getaway van and flooding the space with afternoon light. The entire event happened in less than five seconds.

For an instant, no one spoke, no one sobbed, and no one screamed. No one, including the four remaining animals, even moved. Everyone stared at the figure in the middle of the room, a physically fit but by no means intimidating teenage boy who seemed to be admiring or shocked by his work behind polarized Ray Ban wrap sunglasses. That instant was all the boy and the hostages needed.

As the terrified customers broke and started dispersing to different pieces of cover and escape, the hoodie-clad boy whipped around behind him and sprinted the few feet to the closest teller window. He gripped two of the metal bars in the same impossible grip and wrenched them out in a twisting, pulling motion that snapped the bars into two jagged, two foot long, handheld batons. Combined with the chaos of the fleeing customers, the two pairs of animals on either side of the kid never had a chance to properly regroup. Even if they had, the display of power, agility, and ferocity they were about to face would have beaten them on their best day.

Bear was the closest to the new hero and first to react. The man brought his shotgun up to his shoulder and started to advance, but in the time it took him to do all that, the mysterious boy had already made up the distance between them with breathtaking speed and had penetrated the robber’s defenses, bringing both bars down on the shotgun and breaking one of Bear’s arms in the process.

Bear doubled over, howling in pain for a brief moment before the kid redirected the momentum of his swing, reached back like a major league slugger, and slammed the twin pieces of metal into the thug’s chest. The blow sent the incapacitated robber flying back along the floor and nailing a running Shark before impacting hard against the far wall, knocking pictures and advertisements clattering to the marble below. Both men laid out on the ground, groaning and writhing in anguish.

The teenager ducked instinctively as the surviving animals opened fire, doing everything they could to drop him. To the shell shocked hostages, the battle unfolding in front of them would have been described as graceful if it did not seem so perverse to think about. As soon as the bank robbers started firing, the boy got down in a low crouch and spun around like a break dancer, using his momentum to fling himself back toward the teller windows and drawing fire away from the innocent customers. As soon as the gray blur reached the teller counters, he seemed to skip up to the four foot ledge and propelled himself in a shallow dive toward the two armed men, his hollow bars whistling in the air as they moved with him. He finished his dive with a quick somersault and ended up directly between Lion and Tiger, who hesitated with fear of shooting each other. In that moment of hesitation, the teenager engaged both of them, bars flashing out in sloppy but effective attacks that tried to target specific parts of the body, particularly the knees.

A few hostages risked peeks at the action, but saw only a flurry of motion and heard hauntingly melodic whoosh of the teller bars between the two helpless villains. It was as if someone had badly reenacted a Jason Borne fight scene but sped up the action slightly. Almost simultaneously, the mysterious savior’s weapons found weak spots on the sides of Lion’s and Tiger’s knees and both men yelled aloud in distress, their heads falling forward as a reflex to examine the damage.

The boy seemed to anticipate the motion, standing up with explosive power and swinging his bars up in both hands, pinging the sides of the bars against the exposed chins of the criminals, and knocking them both backwards, already unconscious. Not to be outdone, his lithe arms flashed out and he slapped their guns out of their hands with well-timed flicks of his wrists.

Through the entire seconds long exchange, the boy’s expression remained neutral, though not passive. That neutral face vanished as another single shot rang out, this time followed by a zipping hot flash of pain as the bullet passed through the upper left arm of the boy’s sweatshirt and grazed his flesh. He cried out, a single quick sound of pain that gripped everyone’s hearts with cold fear. The gray hoodie again became a slight blur as he turned around to face the far wall, where Shark was sitting up, pushing away from the scene with his left arm and aiming his captured handgun at the child. The neutral expression left the boy’s remarkable features to be replaced with the flush red of rage and a furrowed brow behind the impenetrable sunglasses. Shark started to scramble faster toward Bear’s loaded gun.

Furious, the teenager adjusted the grip on the bar in his right hand and hurled it in a sidearm motion across his body and toward Shark. To the boy’s horror, his enraged throw went completely off target and embedded itself in a middle-aged man’s leg who was hiding behind a chair fifteen feet away from Shark. Even the hardened criminal stared in shock at the innocent man, who had managed to pull out the jagged bar but could do nothing about the blood beginning to seep out or the mind-erasing pain of the mistake. The boy was still staring at the monstrous accident, jaw slack and face sheet white. The wail of police sirens began to grow in the distance as people outside the building fled the battle in fear.

Before Shark could use the mistake as a distraction to finally reach his comrade’s weapon, the boy took careful aim at the murderer and flung his last remaining bar at the criminal. This time the throw hit true, flying straight into Shark’s exposed right shoulder with such force that the bar went through the meat and carried the man an extra foot into the wall, pinning the robber to the scene of the crime.

The cacophony of the robbery gave way to a post traumatic stillness of sniffling sobs of shock, muffled and stuttering calls to 911, and Shark’s stupefied wail of pain as he finally comprehended what had happened to his shoulder. The Bank of America smelled of gunpowder and blood, mixed surreally with the calming, fading scent of the Potomac in fall. The setting sun reflected off the brick of the surrounding structures and gave the stark, lifeless grays and whites and muted reds a blood orange tint that would have been striking and beautiful outside but inside the crime scene made everything threatening, sad, and exhausting.

In the middle of this chaos, the teenager stood alone, head down, still concealed by hood and sunglasses. While the battle seemed to take no effort at all, the boy’s posture now told a different story. His chest was heaving under his sweatshirt and he wiped cold, clammy palms against his jeans in vain. Now the sirens were clear and distinct, and there were a lot of sirens approaching. The boy’s head twitched up toward one of dozens of security cameras and he swore aloud in a surprisingly shaky voice. He risked a glance toward the man he had injured and was ashamed to see the man staring right back at him.

The boy took a half step toward the victim and opened his mouth to say something but decided against it at the last second. He put a hand up as if to explain himself but could not find any of the words to convey the whirlwind of conflicting thoughts in his young mind. Instead, he drove a fist angrily into a teller counter, smashed a section of the cheap wood to splinters, and fled the bank at the same speed that he had attacked the animals with only a minute ago.

Bank of America
Georgetown, Washington DC
October 17, 6:00pm

“Rewind that last part. Jesus. Christ.”

“I dunno, Fox. Right now that sounds like a pretty decent theory.”

Detective Ryan Fox sighed and pushed his wireframe glasses up on his face so he could pinch the bridge of his thin nose. The career police officer pushed back on the flimsy chair and rolled a few feet away from the glowing computer screen inside the bank’s poor excuse for a surveillance station.

He spun around in the dark room and tried to tune out the dozens of officers milling about and talking idly in the middle of the crime scene as well as the red and blue sweeping lights underneath the door that reminded him his day would probably not end until tomorrow. If he was lucky.

He took another spin on the chair and ran one hand through his short, salt and pepper hair as he checked the time on his other hand. His partner, a fresh-faced new promotion named Tony Tompson, gave the fifth of what would eventually be ten low whistles as he leaned in close and watched the “highlight tape” again.

“So what are you thinking?” Tompson asked, rewinding to watch Zebra get tossed out the front window again.

I think this is something we’ll regret getting involved in, Fox thought wearily.

“I’m trying to think about this rationally,” Fox said, standing up and shrugging in the tiny space. The career man wondered if the surveillance station really was a closet, but pushed it out of his mind. “Best I got, it’s adrenaline. Fight or flight. Like those stories of moms who Hulk out and lift cars off their kids.”

“I dunno,” Tompson said, gesticulating animatedly toward the screen, “look at this stuff. I mean, he throws that dude like it’s nothing.”

“So?”

“Whaddaya mean ‘So?’ He ripped metal bars off a teller window and fought people like Neo. It’s weird. Like ‘Fringe’ weird.”

Fox’s head tilted to one side. “The hell is ‘Fringe’?” He asked.

Tony looked at the much older Detective like he had just grown a second head. “You don’t know that show? ‘Fringe?’ On Fox? It’s about this team of FBI agents. Crazy, inexplicable stuff happens all the time, but it’s totally explained by science. JJ Abrams, man. That guy’s incredible with everything.”

Ryan felt the conversation spiraling out of control and cursed as his cell vibrated, alerting him to a text message. He flipped open the tiny phone and slapped it shut with more force than was necessary. “Speaking of FBI,” he breathed, “they’re gonna be here in ten and they’re gonna want to tear this place up. Let’s wrap this up and make copies of the tapes for us.”

“Already did,” Tony said confidently, tapping a flash drive against his palm like a gangster with a wad of bills, “I’m gonna watch this like fifty times more.”

The two Detectives shrugged on their suit jackets and marched out into the crime scene, ducking under yellow tape and sidestepping photographers that did not seem to exist in a world before “CSI.” Fox could never understand why people watched stupid cop shows like that.

“Here’s what I don’t get,” Tony mused excitedly as he walked beside the taller, broader cop, “that guy? On the tape? Neo. He’s just a kid, can’t be older than eighteen.”

Fox stopped right before the exit to the bank and turned around. “How do you know that?” He asked, more than a little frustrated. Tony had the youthful tendency to jump the gun, a bad habit that had almost blown several cases. Fox was starting to get the feeling Tompson had fallen off the “Don’t make dumb mistakes,” wagon.

Detective Tompson absent-mindedly rubbed at a spot on his dark blue tie before he explained. “Every Georgetown kid wears something G-town on their clothes and this kid arrived on foot and left on foot. Plus, you check out the clothes he’s wearing. That sweatshirt? One of the characters in those ‘Twilight’ movies wears them, and high school girls, they love them the ‘Twilight.’”

Ryan opened his mouth to speak but was stopped by Tony’s raised hands in a gesture of surrender.

“It’s a vampire series thing. It’s stupid, but the kids love it. Then you look at the way he fights. He’s not trained, he doesn’t know anything about fighting except stuff he’s seen on TV or movies…and then there’s the fact that he’s just plain scared at the end there and witnesses said his voice was kinda high. I think he’s a high schooler, I think he’s local, and I think our fed buddies are going to have a very long talk with him when they find him.”

Detective Fox took one more look at the security cameras before pushing outside to the bustling Georgetown street and the Ford Crown Victoria parked in the adjacent vacant lot. “Wish they had robbed the place after he gave a teller his name,” Ryan sighed.

“Takes the fun out of it,” Tony offered, patting his partner on the shoulder and walking slowly along the street in relative silence for a minute. “Hey,” he finally said, “this case…you know, I feel like it bothers you a little more. Why’s that?”

Ryan unlocked the door remotely and rested his elbows on the roof of the Crown Vic, and looked over the car at Tompson. “Because,” he explained, counting off the points on his fingers, “we’ve got an innocent guy who bought a teller window bar in the leg from a mystery someone who put five armed, grown men in traction. That guy’s gonna sue someone, those thugs are going to cost us who knows how much money in medical bills, and apparently we’ve got a super strong, impossibly fast teenager who doesn’t know how to fight but can go Katrina on a local bank. That, and the fact that the feds will probably dissect this kid when they find him—that’s not an ‘if,’ by the way—”

Ryan slapped his hands on the car roof and stared at the sky as if it had insulted him. “I think this guy’s local, too, and I think he was trying to help. Feds will tear that guy up, and you make an almost passable theory that he’s just a kid. That just doesn’t sit right with me. I want to find this kid first.”

A devious smile crept across Tony’s face and he slyly pulled the flash drive out of his jacket pocket. “We put this stuff up on the internet we’ll find him pretty quick,” he chuckled to Ryan’s scowl, then glanced down at his phone quickly. “All right,” he said, “I’m off. Gonna grab some Booey’s before I head back to station. I’ll catch you later.”

“I see any of this on youtube and I’ll rip your lungs out!” Ryan called after his partner. He got a casual wave over Tompson’s shoulder in reply.

As the sirens of approaching FBI vehicles bounced off the old brick and meandered around the famous cobblestones, Fox reached into the glove box of his Crown Victoria and fished out a battered soft pack of cigarettes and a lighter. As he took a guilty drag off the cancer stick, he stared at the red and blue lit crime scene and exhaled with frustration.

“Why’d you do this to me, kid?”

What happens when you have a successful movie franchise that just so happens to be out of source material, well you get the team that created it back together to make a similar movie, but just different enough to disassociate it from it’s successful clone. That’s what The Green Zone is. Starring Matt Damon as a military man who is the perfect soldier.. yadda yadda yadda… we’ll talk more after you watch.

The Bourne references are clear I mean it’s avoidable with the same Director and main star, but is that really a bad thing? I mean The Bourne franchise is the 007 of the USA so why not make him even more American, I especially like the modern warfare setting (see The Kingdom) so I am definitely putting this on my must see of 2010. What do you guys think?
Green Zone stars Matt Damon and Greg Kinnear – Opens March 12, 2010.

לפני חודש בערך, לי-אן מ-freckled nest הכינה שאלון של 20 שאלות מעניינות בבלוג שלה והזמינה את כולם לענות עליהם גם, אז הנה התשובות שלי .

About a month ago, Leigh-Ann from Freckled Nest made a questionnaire of 20 interesting questions on her blog and invited everyone to answer them too, so here are my answers .

1. Show us the inside of something cute

אם זה לא היה הפרה של הזכויות, הייתי מראה תמונה של העמודים הפנימיים של הספר המקסים הזה:

If it wasn’t a right violation, I would show a pic of the inner pages of this adorable book:

{The Fairy Catalogue by Sally Gardner}

אבל אני חושבת שהכריכה עצמה מספיק מתוקה, לא? זה ספר נורא מקסים שקניתי לפני כמה שנים אחרי שחני נחמיאס המליצה עליו בתוכנית “החדר של חני” .

But the cover is cute enough anyway, right? It’s such a lovely book!

2. What’s the last homecooking you had?

ממרח אבוקדו

Avocado spread

3. What do you miss? (alive)

כשהייתי קטנה היה לנו ‘מנהג’ בבית – במשך שנים, כל שנה בצהריים של היום הראשון של חג סוכות, אחרי הארוחה, אבא שלי היה מתיישב בכורסא ואנחנו היינו מגישים לו את “האריה, המכשפה וארון הבגדים” ומתיישבים סביבו; והוא היה מספר לנו את כל הסיפור, מתחילתו ועד סופו.

לפני כמה שנים ‘הגיע הזמן’ להפסיק את המנהג הזה… והפסקנו. ואני מתגעגעת אליו .

When I was a little girl we had a ‘habit’ – for years, every year, on the first day of Sukkot in noon, after the holiday-meal, my dad would sit down in the armchair and we would give him The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe and sit next to him, and he would tell us the whole story, from the beginning till the end.

A few years ago it was time to stop this habit… and we stopped. And I miss it .

~ קישור ~ link ~

4. What makes you laugh often?

אחים שלי

My brothers

5. What’s your favorite word?

אפפוני

Afafuny (here is what it means)

6. What are you trying to quit?

כסיסת ציפורניים, ללכת לישון מאוחר, לדחות דברים יותר מדי

Biting my nails, going to bed late, postponing things too much

7. What’s your favorite commercial right now?

אני בקושייייייי רואה טלוויזיה, אבל אם כבר אז הפרסומות המתוקות של פלאפון.

I hardlyyyyyyy watch tv, but if I had to pick it would be the cute commercials of Pelephone – an Israeli mobile phones company.

8. Whose style do you dig?

אלסי פלניגן, מגי הולמס ולי-אן קפר

Elsie Flannigan, Maggie Holmes and Leigh-Ann Keffer

9. Link to a great blog you’ve discovered lately…

http://www.frecklednest.blogspot.com

10. What’s the last craft you made?

ציור קטן של פרפר שציירתי עם צבעי אקוורל כדי להדביק בדף מעוצב.

I drew a little butterfly using watercolor pencils. I’m planning to use it on one of my layouts.

11. A photo of the last happy mail you got :]

זוכרים שסיפרתי שאני נורא רוצה את הספר הזה?

מצאתי אותו בחנות הזאת ב-19.50$ בערך (כרגע המחיר כבר עלה ל-20.18$  :) ) והמשלוח לכל העולם בחינם!! אז זה יצא שהוא עלה לי בסה”כ 70-80 ₪ .

Remember I told you I wanted this book so badly?

I found it in this store for about 19.50$ (right now it costs 20.18$ ) and there is free delivery worldwide!!

12. Something you’ve got lately?

אתמול אמא שלי, תמי (אחותי) ואני הלכנו לקנות בגדים. בדרך כלל אני שונאת לעשות שופינג (שופינג של בגדים, שופינג של חומרי סקראפ אני “די” אוהבת… ), אבל הפעם דווקא היה לי מצב רוח טוב בשביל זה, ומצאתי חולצה מקסימה שאני נורא אוהבת!

Yesterday my mom, Tammy (my sister) and I went to buy clothes. Usually I hate to go shopping (cloth-shopping, scrapbook-supply-shopping I ‘pretty’ love… ), but this time I had good mood and found a pretty blouse that I love!

13. What are you looking forward to?

צעצוע של סיפור 3!!!!

הוא יוצא ביוני השנה, בדיוק בזמן לסיום התיכון .

Toy story 3!!!!

It is being released in June this year, exactly in time for my graduation from high school .

14. Post a recent snapshot of yourself.

במוצאי שבת הכנתי שיעורי בית במחשבים. כשאמא שלי ראתה אותי מתיישבת להכין ש”ב, היא אמרה לאח שלי לצלם את המאורע. והוא צילם אותי!

שלא תבינו לא נכון, זה לא שאני תלמידה גרועה {דווקא להפך… <מסמיקה>}, אבל אני בדרך כלל מעדיפה להכין אותם בבית הספר בהפסקה לפני השיעור מאשר לשבת על זה בבית כשאני יכולה ליצור . שיעורי בית במחשבים אני כן מכינה בבית כי זה רציני ולרוב גם שיעורי בית באנגלית {לרוב, היום דווקא הכנתי אותם בהפסקה כי בבית שכחתי מהם}. שיעורי בית במתמטיקה הם השיעורים היחידים {או כמעט היחידים…} מהסוג שאני לא מכינה בכלל .

When my mom saw me doing homework in computers a few days ago, she told my brother to take photos of the occasion. And he did!

Don’t understand me wrong, it’s not that I’m a bad pupil {quite the opposite actually… <blushing>}, but I usually prefer to do them at school before the lesson then doing them at home when I can create . The homework I do do at home is in computers and English. The only {or almost only…} homework I don’t do at all is in math .

15. Recent Favorite Movie?

~ קישור ~ link ~

~ קישור ~ link ~

~ קישור ~ link ~

גיליתי שאני ממש נהנית מהסרטים האלה :-O. אני רוצה לקרוא את הספרים, מקווה שהם לא פחות טובים!

I found out I really enjoy these movies :-O. I want to read the books, hope they are not less good!

16. Something you’re working on right now?

באנר חדש לראש הבלוג ודף מעוצב בסגנון קצת וינטאג’י עם תמונה שלי שתמי צילמה.

A new banner to the top of my blog and a vintage-style scrapbook page with a photo of mine that Tammy took.

17. If a movie were made about you, who would play you?

אין לי מושג… רעיון, מישהו?

עריכה: אני חושבת שאם כבר, אז נטלי פורטמן. היא לא דומה לי בכלל, אבל אני ממילא לא מכירה אף שחקנית אחרת שדומה לי… היא שחקנית מעולה והיא המועדפת עליי .

 ונזכרתי עכשיו גם באמי אדמס… ראיתי אותה רק ב”מכושפת” (סרט מקסים!) והיא נורא מתוקה .

Have no idea… idea, someone?

ETA: I think that Natalie Portman. She doesn’t look like me, but I don’t know any other actress that does anyway… She is a great actress and she is my favorite .

Oh, and I’ve just thought about Amy Adams… I saw her in Enchanted (such a lovely movie!) and she is so adorable .  

18. What gives you goosebumps?

סיפורים מרגשים…

Touching stories…

19. Share a new obsession.

באפי קוטלת הערפדים . לא ראיתי את הסדרה הזאת כשהיא שודרה בין השנים 1997-2003, אבל לפני שבוע וחצי אחותי השאילה מחברה שלה די.וי.די של העונה השלישית וראיתי אותה ונהניתי נורא. לא ראיתי את העונות האחרות אז אין לי מושג איך הן.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer . I didn’t watch this series when it was broadcasted in 1997-2003, but week and a half ago my sister borrowed DVDs of the third season from her friend and I watched it and enjoyed a lot. I haven’t seen the other seasons so I have no idea how they are. 

20. What’s the meaning of your life?

אני חושבת שהמשמעות של החיים של כולנו היא להיות טובים יותר… ולהפוך את העולם שלנו לטוב יותר… ולכל אחד יש את הדרך המיוחדת שלו לעשות את זה… אני עוד לא יודעת בדיוק מהי הדרך שלי.

I think the meaning of the lives of all of us is to become better and better… and make our world better… and every one of us has their own special way to do that… I don’t know yet what exactly my way is.

I’ve made it to 100 posts! So, what does one do for one’s 100th post? One gets someone else to write it! My wonderful husband has agreed to take the task upon himself and will be joining the book blogosphere this evening. It seems quite fitting for him to take over my 100th post, because without him my very first post would have never happened.

Without further ado, please put your hands together for the Mr.!

The Bourne Identity is pretty much the ultimate spy novel you will ever read. If you haven’t read it yet, you will be convinced to read it by the end of this blog post.

Jason Bourne is the main character in a trilogy of books by Robert Ludlum. The first book in the series, The Bourne Identity, starts with Jason being shot multiple times and dumped overboard into the murky waters of the Mediterranean Sea. From there he miraculously survives but has complete amnesia and is soon attacked by people he does not know. He naturally uses his spy skills, his cunning and intelligence to try to figure out who he is and why he was almost murdered.

Soon after you start reading the book you will become emotionally attached to the well-being of Mr. Bourne and in figuring out why so many people are after him. The novel has multiple plot lines, a range of characters and so many questions that leave you wondering how any of it can be resolved.

Who is Carlos the Jackal, what is Jason’s history, and what was he doing on that boat?

A word about the film: The Bourne Identity; please, the film and the book share the same name but beyond that they are completely different stories. Don’t relate the two and if you’ve seen the movie but haven’t opened the book give it a try; it will open your eyes to the great storytelling of Robert Ludlum.

If you are even remotely interested in thriller, suspense, or spy novels, read this book. You will be pleasantly surprised.

 Diretamente do elenco de Star Trek, Chris Pine, que interpretou o Capitão James T. Kirk, está cada vez mais em alta em Hollywood.

Agora, o ator está em negociações para protagonizar o personagem Jack Ryan.  A Paramount (também de Star Trek) e Pine estão se entendendo, segundo a Variety.

O novo filme em questão não será adaptada de nenhuma das história do autor do personagem da CIA, Tom Clancy. E sim, uma roteiro inédito escrito Hossein Amini.

Por enquanto ainda não existe um cronograma sobre o novo filme, bem como será para o ator coinciliar a agenda para estar na continuação de Star Trek. 2010 será de muito trabalho para Pine.

O personagem Jack Ryan já foi vivido nos cinemas por atores como: Alec Baldwin (Caçada ao Outubro Vermelho), Harrison Ford (Jogos Patrióticos e Perigo Real e Imediato) e Ben Affleck (A Soma de Todos os Medos).

Os rumores da volta do espião da CIA aos cinemas já vinham se arrastando desde o ano passado e finalmente começam ser levados adiante. Espionagem como franquias de sucesso estão voltaando a pauta também. Depois do sucesso de Jason Bourne, 007 renasceu. Veremos o que virá.

Guilherme Jr.

Bildiğimiz ailecek severek izlediğimiz Jason Bourne’un filmlerinden sonra oyunu da geliyormuş. Adı Bourne Ascendancy olacakmış. Daha önceki oyunu PC için çıkmamıştı ama bu bütün platformlara çıkar tahminimce. Şubat ayında piyasaya çıkacağı söyleniyormuş. Hadi bakalım.

Taken (2008)
★★★★ / ★★★★

The best thing about this movie was its intensity. From start to finish my heart was racing like crazy because I knew that something bad was always bound to happen. Liam Neeson stars as an ex-CIA agent father who embarks on a mission in Paris to rescue his daughter (Maggie Grace) from the hands of slave traders. I can see why this became a sleeper hit: it had a lot of genuine thrills, exciting action sequences, and a plot that was easy to understand. Aside from the obvious rescue mission, this was a story of revenge in its purest form, supported by the fact that Neeson’s character did not take any prisoner. This was essentially a very “guy” movie because the lead character had a one-track mind and would do anything–even hurt innocents–to get to his daughter. I’ve heard a lot of complaints from audiences that it did not make any sense that a “regular guy” suddenly turned into a Jason Bourne (from the “Bourne” series). I am happy to say that those people simply did not pay attention because in the exposition of the picture, it was discussed that Neeson’s character was once a part of the CIA. I feel that this criticism needs to be addressed because, as a person who waited to see this film on DVD, such comments implanted a seed in my head that the movie was going to be unbelievably atrocious. It was far from ridiculous because active agents who go on assassination missions do exist and, as we very well know (unless one is so deluded or lives in a bubble), slave trade exists as well. Lastly, I have to commend Neeson for essentially carrying this entire movie. Not only was I convinced that he was a dangerous man, but I was convinced that he was a father who really loved his daughter more than anybody in the world, including himself, even if his gestures were not quite appreciated given the amount of thought and effort that was put into them. (He’s very detailed-oriented.) Directed by Pierre Morel, “Taken” is a must-see movie for fans of secret agent films and those who love great suspense mixed with good action sequences.

Jeg så at “Gåten Jason Bourne” vises på TV i kveld. Da følte jeg for å mimre litt….
Dette er min yndlingshelt, 3 av mine yndlingsfilmer og 1 av mine yndlingslåter.
Jeg har lset noen rykter om at det er skrevet 2 oppfølgere med tillatelse av Robert Ludlum. De kunne jeg tenke meg å lese. Må sjekke det opp en gang….

I mellomtiden: ENJOY! (Må visst følge linken til YouTube)

So Jud Wilhite’s wife, Lori had a competition type thing on her blog to pick a couple of people to win a free copy of this book…

All I had to do was say what my favourite Kung Fu movie was. (Like there isn’t a CLEAR winner on that one….I have 4 words for you people…Wax on, Wax off)

Although a later comment brought to my attention that really if I had a choice I’d like to be a Jason Bourne/James Bond combo. Like Jason Bourne’s deadly martial art assassin skills, and James Bond’s funky gadgets (the cars….oh the cars…). Can I leave out the Bourne amnesia and the Bond alcoholism & sleeping around?

So now a copy of Deadly Vipers is gonna be making its way to Scotland…land of the brave but slightly stupid (e.g. kilts with no underwear in a windy country with sub arctic climate in places?)

I’m so excited! Hee hee!

Before you fear any more FilmWipe fans our lists will come to an abrupt end tomorrow night when we will hit the world of film review full force with a weird of Aki Kurasmaki classic.  But before we do I have noticed that this Blog has tended to focus on the best of European and Art house film.  ”There is nothing wrong with that” I hear you cry.  And while I may agree with you there are 270 million obese burger eating junkies who have got the most powerful national cinema in the world.  So we will honour them and there meagre achievements.  I actually love Hollywood films so hopefully tonight will be a quick guide to everything that has been good in the world of the blockbuster this year.

I will start off with the taking of The Taking of Pelham 123. I am a massive Tony Scott fan.  anyone who has seen the Spy Game and Enemy of the State will know what a brilliant director he can be.  However i approached this film with some trepidation as a film about a train hijacking with John Travolta as a tattooed bad guy (frankly he looks like he has escaped from a leper colony).  Anyway the film is surprisingly entertaining.  Despite holes in the plot the size of the grand canyon.  However lets not focus on the negatives.  The film is brilliantly directed, performed wonderfully and speeds a long as fast as suicide bomber hijacking a train.

In my opinion the best hollywood film release of the year is Tom Tykwer’s the The International. The film is possibly the best blockbuster of the year.  Clive Owen is brilliant and gives a performance that surely will put any of this years Oscar candidates to shame.  Tom Tykwer is in the envious position of having directed a film that is beautiful to look at engrossing throughout.  By the end you feel like the mantle of intelligent action thriller has been stolen from the Bourne series and given to this stylish transnational thriller.

The other action thriller that stole the year was inevitably Star Trek.  JJ Abrams.  The film was simply brilliant.  Finally a Star Trek film that is enjoyable even if you hate sci-fi.  For all his critics i thought that Chris Pine put in the best performance by a young person this year.  His teen choice award nomination actually almost made the award credible, instead of the acne fest it currently is.  and he even gave Shatner a run for his money.   The story was a little far fetched even for Star Trek and the bad guy was played by one of the worst actors currently  floating around on the Hollywood circuit (Eric “I can’t act” Bana).  However this film was excellent.  The acting was generally very good.  The upgrades to the typical star trek sets were fantastic.  The story was enjoyable and more importantly it was gripping throughout.  Genuinely one of the top films of the year.

I Love You Man.  No I don’t!! But this is the best Hollywood comedy of the year.  Jason Segel is brilliant as the youthful Sydney File.  The bromance that is exhibited in the film is and makes you wish you had friends like this.  The only low point is Rashida Jones as the girlfriend of the girls guy played by Paul Rudd.  At no point can you understand why on earth he would ever be with her.  However, you laugh from start to finish.  Anyone who thinks that The Hangover was the funniest film of the year first of all needs to seriously question their life and possibly think about jumping into the Thames with a lead weight tight to their feet and secondly watch this film.

Duplicity.  I feel like i have committed a crime suggesting this.  But i genuinely enjoyed this film.  Clive Owen was spellbinding yet again.  Julia Roberts was hopeless.  The film as a whole doesn’t make a great deal of sense.  However, Tony Gilroy the director made a beautiful film that was visually stunning and entertaining throughout.  Roberts aside the film is brilliantly acted with the excellent Paul Giamatti and Tom Wilkinson weighing in with strong performances.  This is a film of contrast but is certainly well worth watching.

It’s no secret, the Vulcan Stev household enjoys movies.  The subject of movie franchises came up the other day during one of our many movie discussions.  “What’s a Franchise Daddy?” PIT #3 asked.

“A movie franchise is a series of movies set in the same fictional universe, telling stories usually revolving around the same key characters and most often released by the same studio,” is the definition we arrived at.

“Star Wars”, “Star Trek”, and James Bond were three franchises that jumped immediately to mind.  The discussion then evolved to the actors who made the roles famous.  How some actors will forever be defined by the role they played.  Sean Conery, Roger Moore, Pierce Brosnan, and Daniel Craig will forever be known as James Bond regardless of any other role they play.  William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy are locked into the American psyche as Kirk and Spock.

Some of these franchise characters have successfully been played by more than one actor (James Bond, Obi Wan Kenobi, and more recently Kirk and Spock).  We got to wondering how some characters can be so linked to the actor that it seems almost sacrilege to recast the role (the furor over the recent Star Trek film all the way back to the controversy of Connery stepping out of the Bond role) to the fact some actors are so linked with the famous role they play that their careers never recover (Mark Hamil or Carrie Fisher).

PIT #3 then asked if there were any actors lucky enough to have two franchise characters to their credit.  We then defined a franchise character as having appeared in at least three separate films.  To qualify the actor has to have played the character at least three times.  We came up with this list:

Mel Gibson:  Mad Max, The Road Warrior and Detective Riggs from the Lethal Weapon.  Mel Gibson burst into the American film scene with his role of Max.  The Lethal Weapon franchise earned him a place on this list.

Orlando Bloom earned his place on this list with his portrayal of Legolas in the Lord of the Rings Films and his presence on the screen as Will Turner in the Pirates of the Caribbean films.

Patrick Stewart had a successful career long before Gene Roddenberry cast him as Captain Jean Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise D.  Seven years of inspired acting on his (and his castmates) part led a loyal fanbase to embrace a universe beyond the roles and actors of the “failed” 60s TV show.  Stewart’s prowess as an actor and acclaim among the hordes of its target audience gave 20th Century Fox all the reason it needed to cast him in the role of Charles Xavier in its X-Men series of films.

Harrison Ford has the unique position of being the only actor (we can think of) to play three franchise characters, though only two qualify by the rules we laid out.  Ford got his big break with the role of Han Solo in Star Wars.  Luckily for us, George Lucas listened to some advice and cast Harrison as Indiana Jones.  The role was sufficiently different from that of Han Solo that Ford was not typecast and averted the fate of Mark Hammil and Carrie Fisher.  Had Harrison not had problems with the script for “The Sum of All Fears” he would have had the unique spot of having three franchises to his credit with the role of Jack Ryan.

Ian McKellen is another actor on this list who owes his place to the Lord of the Rings and X-Men sagas.  As such he is the only actor to have co-starred with others on this list in the same franchises.  Magneto and Gandalf have been kind to Sir Ian.

Sylvester Stallone should get a seperate categoy for the ten films he’s done with these two characters:  Rocky and Rambo.  Two characters each known by a single name.  Each character a flawed patriot.  Six Rocky films and four Rambo films put Sly on the list.    I may be wrong but I think he’s the record holder for number of films to his credit with only two characters.

Matt Damon is a relative new comer to the list.  His portrayal of Jason Bourne in the Bourne series and Linus Caldwell in the Ocean’s Eleven series make him a member of this particular club.

Da Govinator gets an honorable mention for his roles as The Terminator and Conan the Barbarian though he only played Conan twice, he is the only actor to have portrayed Conan on the big screen.  The character in Red Sonja is also close enough to Conan to Give Arnold Schwarzenegger a mention.

Almsot there (but not quite) is Vin Diesel.  He’s played Riddick in two motion pitures and one animated direct-to-video release.  Although he’s played Domminic Toretto in three of the Fast and the Furious movies, it was only a cameo in Tokyo Drift.  Accord to IMDb both of these franchises have Diesel starring films in pre-production

     After a long hiatus, I find it necessary to bring back a Ranty Classic. Conspiracy Theories. I have been silenced by various forces in the government who find my views unpleasant, but by a clever manipulation of one letter of my last name I found a way to elude them. SUCKERS!

Matt Damon Clones

     If you watched The Office last Thursday, you most surely noted that one of the interns bore a striking resemblance to Matt Damon. What relevance does this have to anything you may be asking. Well it’s quite obvious. The government is cloning Matt Damon. What reason could they possibly have for this? The answer is simple: To create a race of superior poker players. Any of you that have seen Rounders knows that the Matt Damon gene contains not only superior acting capabilites but the ability to bust down Teddy KGB at will. After the recent financial crisis, the government was obviously looking for ways to make money. What better way than with legalized gambling? These Matt Damon clones have their bankrolls financed by the CIA and work as “Kites.” If anyone finds their identity, they are cut loose and disavowed. All their earnings go directly to the government to fund things that they do not want us to know about. Through extensive research I found out what some of these projects are. One is to figure out a way to put ketchup and mustard in the same bottle, thus saving Americans literally seconds of time in bottle switching mayhem. Another is screen doors for submarines. Yes, this was originally a Polish idea but the goverment has seen some merit to the project. Those nuclear reactors aren’t going to cool themselves. Anyway, something went horribly wrong with the cloning and one of the noobs got more acting talent than he was supposed to. After being disavowed, he obviously tried to make it as an actor and stumbled onto The Office. Because of Damon’s work on the Bourne Trilogy, he can blend in to any situation. The government apparently overlooked this and I predict more of the clones going rouge. Count on various university janitors solving complex mathematical problems, or men having all of their brothers killed in WWII and having Tom Hanks fish them out of the mess.

Clearly a clone.

—

Listen: Third Eye Blind, “Non Dairy Creamer”
Quote: “Not victory, Obi-Wan. The shroud of the Dark Side has fallen. Begun, this Clone War has.” – Yoda

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Tickets from Abroad

     The next conspiracy comes from a friend who shall remain nameless to protect her identity. Although I managed to get this post out, it is only a matter of time until the gummyment finds me again and I would not want my crimes taken out on her. Said nameless person’s parents visited Italy and rented a car with GPS there. This GPS was supposed to tell them where they could drive and park legally while in Italy. Unfortunately, a year later they began to receive tickets in the mail for various parking violations while in Italy. Obviously this is some sort of conspiracy between the GPS companies and world governments. The GPS companies get a certain cut of the tickets while hapless Americans pay tickets that they can no longer remember. Absolutely brilliant. Apparently the statute of limitations on parking tickets knows no bounds in other countries. My advice: If you get a ticket for a parking ticket in another country, don’t pay it. Chances are we don’t have extradition with the country, so they can’t touch you. If you have to go to said country again, use an alias. Airports are pretty cool with that nowadays.

This could be from Italy, who knows?

—

Listen: The Used, “Lunacy Fringe”
Quote: “There are big signs, you can’t park there! They should get towed! I hope they get towed to Queens, and the Triborough is closed, and there’s a big craft show at Shea, a flea market, or a tractor show!” – President Josiah Bartlet

We went to see Julie Julia last night. Probably the first film I’ve gone to see in the cinema in recent years that wasn’t Harry Potter, James Bond or Jason Bourne. I don’t typically enjoy non action films but I had good reasons for going to see this one that were unconnected with my film preferences.

In case you haven’t seen the film yet, don’t worry there are no spoilers in this blog.

What was amazing about the film for me was that Julie was just starting blogging and I was so conscious of her thoughts about “who is out there?” being the same ones that I had had when I started. One of the main differences between her’s and mine is that she had a project to work on and I can see the attractions of a publicly accountable – you might say globally accountable target: your followers can enjoy your progress towards achievement of the goal, but unfortunately when you achieve your target or reach the deadline, it – the blog – must come to an end.

The film is entirely credible – in fact the film is based on two true stories – but that in itself is not what makes it credible to the viewer. The story of two ordinary episodes about four people almost two generations apart and how they are inextricably linked by a common overarching purpose, almost an obsession, is what makes this a story for today. It’s a story about achieving targets and goals in the face of unexpected difficulty.

For me the film had only one disappointment and it came right at the end. But I can’t tell you what it was else it would spoil the film for you. I was pondering on that expectation as we walked from the cinema and then it struck me, these were two true stories. My imagined ending was just that – it hadn’t happened in real life –  the whole of the film was true and so although my ending would have been “nicer”, it wouldn’t really have “worked”.

Which just goes to show you that real life doesn’t often turn out as we would like, as storybooks would have us believe. But one thing is real – set yourself stretching, almost impossible objectives and then get on with it. Life will get in the way but the truly committed will find a way round.

Lobster killer?

Go see the film – I told you – no spoilers here

JohnF

Hi,

     Jason Bourne movie series (The Bourne Identity, The Bourne Supremacy and The Bourne Ultimatum) is one of the popular movie series. When you talk about Jason Bourne, how can you forget Matt Damon (and my favorite one)? Matt Damon acted (and fitted) perfectly as Jason character. He did amazing acting in all 3 movies and has signed-up with Paul Greengrass for fourth part. 

     Why suddenly Jason Bourne? Right? Hmmm.. Yesterday I was watching The Bourne Ultimatum on HBO (If you missed or still not watch, then watch it. They broadcasting all 3 movies in repetitive manner) and search on Google (I have internet on my hand and so Google is best option to know anything…right?) and I found lots of interesting things about Jason Bourne Character.

   All Bourne movies are loosely based (or you can say inspired) on Bourne Series Novel. Robert Ludlum was creator of Jason Bourne, A Fictional Character. The character has been in 8 Bourne series novel. However first 3 novels are written by Robert Ludlum and later 5 novels are written by Eric Van Lustbader (with permission from the estate of Robert Ludlum).

Jason Bourne Series Novels (Click on Image to know more about Novel)

Robert Ludlum novels
- The Bourne Identity(1980) - Robert Ludlum	The Bourne Supremacy(1986) - Robert Ludlum
The Bourne Ultimatum (1990) - Robert Ludlum

Eric Van Lustbader novels
The Bourne Legacy (2004) - Eric Van Lustbader	The Bourne Betrayal (2007) - Eric Van Lustbader
The Bourne Sanction (2008) - Eric Van Lustbader	The Bourne Deception (2009) - Eric Van Lustbader
UpComing Novel -The Bourne Objective

The Bourne Identity (2002)	The Bourne Supremacy (2004)
The Bourne Ultimatum (2007)

Extra Details

- Before Matt Damon’s Borne Series, The Bourn Identity (A television film) was produced in 1988 with Richard Chamberlain as Jason.

- Robert Ludlum’s The Bourne Conspiracy is video game based on Bourne Series novel.

!!! Rock On !!!

So, it seems someone among you thought I was neglecting my blog. Not updating it often enough. And so you decided to sic the Government on me for Hardwood Neglect.

Yeah, that’s cool. Thanks for that.

Well, your little plan backfired. For a number of reasons. First of all, as you can see from the picture above, my hardwood flooring loves me. Prefinished Cumaru, Engineered Brazilian Cherry, Prefinished Flamewood and I go on roller coasters, we paint mustaches on things that ought not be mustachioed, and we have had important talks pertaining to adolescent topics that need to be addressed for their safety and health as saplings.

Second of all, when the Feds come for my hardwood babies? I go Jason Bourne on their bureaucratic behinds. As you can again see from the photo, me and my babies are on the road, on the run. That didn’t just happen out of the blue. When the agents came to the door, I invited them in for tea. Then I went to the bathroom. I let loose my tell-tale clicking code to my hardwood babies that means “The Feds are here trying to take you away from me and now we are borrowing Kevin Bacon’s Lear jet to escape from their clutches.”

Once we had rallied in the back yard, unbeknownst to the agents, Kevin told me from the other end of the horn that he didn’t know who I was.

Kind of shows you who your friends are when the chips are down.

Instead, we all hopped in our Rocket Powered Radio Flyer, blew the fence door open with the force of our momentum, and flew down the suburban streets, bidding goodbye to our peaceful life of mustache painting and roller coastering and hurtling towards a world of box cars, smores, Kumbaya sing-alongs, and sleeping with switch blades. (Switch blades are also handy during the sing-alongs, which kind of kills the vibe.)

Nomadic life hasn’t been all bad. Cumaru and Flamewood sometimes pick on Engineered Brazilian Cherry because he’s engineered and a little chunky (5″ wide to their 3″) but other than that we are still a happy family.

The lesson here, people, is that you don’t always understand situations, and you shouldn’t be quick to judge. In that spirit, Kevin, I’m not going to take it personally that you totally did not bring your Lear jet to save me from the Feds. After a little reflection, I figured out that you’re probably just too proud to say it got repossessed after the whole Madoff Ponzi thing.

It’s cool, man. We’re still bros.

Get ready for more frequent updates from the highways and byways of America least patrolled by the FBI!

The people who meander through the middle of a crowded mall, airport or movie theater and just STOP in the middle of the stream, looking around with confused faces, oblivious to the human traffic piling up behind them. Bonus points if they run over toes with strollers or suitcases.

The biathlon. Does anyone except Jason Bourne need to ski cross-country while shooting a rifle?

Becoming a proctologist. The money must be great.

Why Subway puts oil and vinegar all over their subs, then gives you one napkin.

Parents who constantly holler at their kids for being kids—i.e. curious, talkative, busy. Start saving now for their therapy.

Those ducks people dress up and place outside their front doors.

Joining “causes” on Facebook. Am I missing the way this is helping?

Pastors who think it’s a good idea to have their son as associate pastor, wife as women’s ministry director, daughter as children’s director, etc……and the elders who allow it.

Why the ice cream truck in my neighborhood played “Silent Night” all summer.

Beauty pageants.

Beauty pageants for girls under 18.

Beauty pageants for girls under 8.

More here.