L’actor Kevin Costner cantarà al Palau de la Música Catalana de Barcelona els dies 18 i 19 de febrer, i ho farà al costat de la Modern West Band, una banda de cinc membres més de la qual forma part des de fa 20 anys.

El concert, que s’emmarca en el XI Festival Mil·lenni, serà la primera actuació de l’actor nord-americà en un escenari a Espanya, i donarà a conèixer una faceta musical desconeguda que fusiona folk, rock i country.

Les entrades per escoltar a Barcelona l’actor de ‘Ballant amb llops’ i ‘El guardaespatlles’ es posaran a la venda el dia 27. Els preus oscil·len des dels 19 fins a 98 euros.

Since this college semester is coming to a close in a few weeks, I’ve decided to post my current Top 10 films list for a two part blog, giving reasons and a video showing a clip from each film.  Now, I won’t go and call myself the best film critic by any stretch of word and there are still plenty of movies I have yet to see.  But I figure there’s no harm in constantly updating your list and for a good while, this has been what the top has looked like.  So here it is, part one:

10. Forrest Gump

This is definitely a clear contender for a most popular film list; and with good reason.  Many scenes, characters and lines have been mentioned, quoted and spoofed countless times, but this is all the more reason it’s such a great movie.  Sure, we’ve all seen it only a billion and a half times already, but it never loses its charm.  Although Forrest might not be the brightest apple on the tree, he’s one of the most naturally good at-heart.  A big part of what makes this such an easy film to follow is how Forrest’s adventures and, at times, struggles are a fair representation of what many common Americans go through.  The film has recently been criticized for having a constrained view on some of these moments but this is more a misconception than anything.  What Forrest deals with and notices are intended to be passed off from his view, which is as neutral and unbiased as you can possibly get.  Some might think the film struggles with its message(s), which it doesn’t but this is only more reason the film relates so easily to us (multiple messages and some not being so clear at first).

“What’s my destiny, Mama?”

“You’re gonna have to figure that out yourself.  Life is a box of chocolates, Forrest.  You never know what you’re gonna get.”

9. Stand By Me

I’ve become a fairly big fan of Stephen King in the past couple years.  I feel that he’s (mostly) offered some of the best stories out there, whether they detail strong characters or have striking scenarios, he’s almost never left me underwhelmed.  And despite how much I might praise his other works; I think the story that hits home the most for me is the film adaptation of Stand By Me.  The plot is very basic and gives us little more than the little journey that our four main characters go through.  But this simplicity gives the film a lot of room to detail the characters and we definitely get a strong dose of that, namely from Gordie and Chris.  The relationship between all four characters feels natural and realistic, with great agreements and sometimes bitter arguments sprouting out.  Anyone who’s seen the film unedited knows that it doesn’t try to sugarcoat anything but you’re not getting morbid or depressing images either.  It’s a kind of film that can easily to speak to anyone because of it cleverly maintaining a mid-ground mood.

“**** writing, I don’t want to be a writer.  It’s stupid.  It’s a stupid waste of time.”

“That’s your dad talking.”

“Bull****”

“Bull true.  I know how your dad feels about you.  He doesn’t give a **** about you, Denny was the one he cared about and don’t try to tell me different.  You’re just a kid, Gordie.”

“Oh, gee!  Thanks, Dad!”

“Wish the hell I was your Dad.  You wouldn’t be goin’ around talkin’ about takin’ these stupid shop courses if I was.  It’s like God gave you something, man, all those stories you can make up.  And He said, ‘This is what I got for ya, kid.  Try not to lose it.’  Kids lose everything unless there’s someone there to look out for them.  And if your parents are too ****ed up to do it, then maybe I should.”

8. Letters from Iwo Jima

This might sound blasphemous to some, but I’m pretty late to the Clint Eastwood party.  In fact, this and Flags of Our Fathers were my introduction to his work.  But as we all know Mr. Eastwood has seldom missed the mark and he definitely did a great job with Flags of Our Fathers.  Then there’s Letters from Iwo Jima, which trumps its American sibling in every conceivable way.  Despite telling the tale from the Japanese point of view, this film actually hits home harder than Flags of Our Fathers.  Giving us an idea of what the conditions were (probably) like for the Japanese soldiers who worked, fought and died on Iwo Jima is one of the film’s strongest aspects.  And it’s carried out throughout the entire runtime with pure excellence, giving us strong performances from the entire cast (especially Ken Watanabe) and dramatic moments matched by a solemnly peaceful score.  War has taken many forms and become the inspiration for a wide variety of films-this is one that gets my utmost recommendation for even the remotely curious.

“If our children can live safely for one more day it would be worth the one more day we defend this island.”

7. The War

Don’t be confused, this isn’t that forgettable film featuring Jason Statham and Jet Li.  Instead, this is a picture from 1994 staring Kevin Costner and a young Elijah Wood playing part of a dirt poor family in 1970.  I will say I’m definitely biased towards this film mostly because it hasn’t gotten much recognition and has thus become more of a cult favorite.  The synopsis doesn’t sound terribly interesting on paper and the happy-happy-joy-joy DVD cover indicates a very bland film.  However, this is a movie that, like most of the films on my Top 10 list, hit close to him simply for its characters.  The relationships are mostly believable and the acting is solid all around.  This leads to a real shame about the film: only two (three if you count Lucas Black) of the actors made it.  Many of the supporting characters were filled by people who looked like they had plenty of potential yet only Wood and Costner hit it big.  A number of messages are told throughout the film and although they aren’t emphasized quite to the extent of, say, Forrest Gump, it helps keep the film from feeling like it’s preaching.  I’m sure most who are reading this haven’t seen the film and likely won’t find it at their local video store.  But I highly urge even buying it since it can very easily grow on you and a number of scenes contribute to give it plenty of re-watch value.

“I hope you know them’s the kids who just beat me up.”

“I know who they are, son.”

“Then why’d you give them Ma and Lidia’s cotton candy?”

6. Schindler’s List

Of all the films on my Top 10 list, this is the one that I can never bring myself to watching multiple times.  I’ve only seen the movie one time, but that single viewing alone leaves such a mark on you that it’s almost impossible to forget the details.  This is a very different film for Spielberg which turns out to be a wonderful shift and only makes me wonder why he hasn’t done more dramas.  On the flip side, part of what helps Schindler’s List work so well is that we haven’t gotten very many films that even come close to hitting the serious mark it has.  Those who haven’t seen it should be aware that this is a very unapologetic viewing which, given the subject matter, is very important.  What’s best is that we get this inspired tale of a single setting in the Holocaust and it never loses the tight grip in the three hour runtime.  Schindler’s List very clearly deserved its Best Picture win at the Oscars for a number of reasons, including how unrelenting, convincing and absorbing it is.

“I could have got more out.  I could have got more.  I don’t know.  If I’d just…I could have got more.”

“Oskar, there are eleven hundred people who are alive because of you.  Look at them.”

“If I’d made more money…I threw away so much money.  You have no idea.  If I’d just…”

“There will be generations because of what you did.”

“I didn’t do enough!”

“You did so much.”

“This car.  Goeth would have bought this car.  Why did I keep the car?  Ten people right there.  Ten people.  Ten more people.”

“This pin.  Two people.  This is gold.  Two more people.  He would have given me two for it, at least one.  One more person.  A person, Stern.  For this.  I could have got one more person…and I didn’t!  And I…I didn’t!”

There have been at least a thousand different films about arrogant rookies who endure basic training and make their new commanding officer proud.

We have had army, air force and marines but has their ever been one about US Coast Guard? Furthermore, do we need one?

The Guardian stars Kevin Costner as Ben Randall, a grizzled veteran of the Coast Guard who has developed a lengthy and infamous career as a rescue swimmer. Swimmers are the men we see jumping out of helicopters to help address the situation in the water before a victim is rescued by the helicopter.

One night, Randall has a rescue go horrifically wrong and the incident forces his commander, Capt. William Hadley (Clancy Brown) to send Randall to the Academy to train new swimmers. Randall feels crippled and to make matters worse his estranged wife, Helen (Sela Ward) leaves him.

In Randall’s first class, a new upstart Jake Fischer (Ashton Kutcher) beckons to break all Randall’s records and yearns to become the greatest swimmer the Academy has ever seen.

As basic training continues, Randall’s “no-holds-barred” training ruffles a lot of feathers with his fellow teachers and the cadets. However, Fischer is relentless.

Can Randall break Fischer? What is Fischer’s secret? Will Ben Randall ever get over the incident?

‘The Guardian’ is directed by Andrew Davis whose long career in Hollywood has spawned a lot of memorable action films. Davis’s first film that really established him as an up-incoming director was ‘Code of Silence’ which still stands as one of Chuck Norris’s strongest films from the mid 1980s.

He was responsible for introducing us to Steven Seagal in ‘Above the Law’ and for the very under-rated action film ‘The Package’ with Gene Hackman in the late 1980s. The early 1990s found Davis re-teaming with Seagal for ‘Under Siege’ which is still Seagal’s best film to date. Finally in 1993, Davis directed his most famous film when he re-imagined the classic TV series ‘The Fugitive’ with Harrison Ford.

After the Fugitive, it seems that Davis lost his way. All his movies post-Fugitive were overly long, cliched and disasters at the box office. He found some redemption when he directed the family film, ‘Holes’ which rejuvenated his struggling career and showed that Davis wasn’t a one genre director. Sadly, ‘The Guardian’ will not be his return to fine form in the action genre.

The film is solidly directed and has fine performances from both Kutcher and Costner but like so many Davis films before it, the film suffers the same curse as his recent track record.

The film feels like it could have ended at least six times. This film could have easily lost 30-40 minutes in the editing room.

I liked the open sea sequences which were ripe with intensity and danger. The Academy scenes were stable but nothing really new was explored. At times it felt like an instructional presentation on the Coast Guard.

I also felt that the film never allowed any of the supporting characters to materialize as anything more than tools to tell the overly long and drawn out story.

The perfect example of wasted screen time was Sela Ward playing the estranged wife, yet again. I really love Ward and always hoped she would find that plum role that would work but it seems as if she did all her great performances on TV.

I wanted this to be a showcase to what Davis gave us back in the early 90s but instead he seems to lack confidence. I think what would help Davis a lot would to be find a skilled editor who can make his films clean, sleek and under 140 minutes.

3 out of 5

So Says the Soothsayer.

I do this all the time with my riding buddies, great way to cool off.

When I was five years old, I distinctly remember going to the mall with my mom to see a movie. I wouldn’t stop raving about Flashdance, and was broken-hearted when she said, “No.” (Back then, I didn’t know it was a rated-R film inspired by the true story of a female welder/stripper in Toronto.)

Interestingly, I never saw Flashdance until I was a college sophomore. Wow, what a corny plot: Alex Owens (Jennifer Beals), an 18-year-old who lives alone in a converted warehouse, is a welder at a steel mill by day and a bar dancer at night. She shacks up with Nick Hurley-her boss at the steel mill (who happens to have connections at the esteemed dance academy she wants to attend)-trains with her mentor/coach (who ironically dies a couple days before her audition), nails her audition, and apparently gets accepted (though I’m not exactly sure because the ending scene just show her running out of the building, with a smile, into Nick’s loving arms). No wonder this opened to poor reviews. Yet and still, it was a box office smash and grossed $100+ million worldwide.

I also remember hearing Michael Sembello’s Grammy Award-winning song, “Maniac,” on the radio. (Back then, I didn’t know it was originally written about a serial killer and the lyrics were adjusted for the film.) But what I really love is its music video. Sure, Irene Cara’s “Flashdance…What a Feeling” won a slew of awards-including an Oscar and a Golden Globe-but nothing beats the scenes of Alex’s body double running in place during dance practice, those ridiculous closeups of the side of her butt cheek, or that glorious slowmo leap through the air.

As an adult, I can appreciate what the film accomplished but yep, it definitely wasn’t suitable for me as a young child.

Did you know:

The role of Alex was turned down by Melanie Griffith, and Beals beat out two other finalists (including Demi Moore) for the lead. Gene Simmons (yes, of KISS) rejected the role of Alex’s boss/boyfriend Nick, which was secured by Michael Nouri. Kevin Costner was the runner-up for this part.

Irene Cara penned the “Flashdance…What a Feeling” lyrics en route to the studio the day she recorded the track.

The music video for “Maniac” was a trailblazer, as it was the first to use only movie scenes.

Alex’s off-the-shoulder sweatshirt actually came about when Beals accidentally shrunk the shirt in the wash, and subsequently cut off the collar so it could fit over her head.

I decided to take a break from the sequel theme and focus on another “type” of sequel: the Director’s Cut.  It’s not uncommon for a landmark film to be re-released in a “better” version that meets the director’s vision.  Often these new cuts feature unseen footage and clearer, crisper sound and picture quality.  Sometimes the director’s cut is better than the original, sometimes it’s worse and sometimes it doesn’t make a difference at all.

I decided to watch a few director’s cuts and their original versions and review them in shorter, mini-reviews.

Apocalypse Now (1979) / Apocalypse Now Redux (2001)

Original: 153 min. / Cut: 202 min.

The original version of “Apocalypse Now” is perhaps one of the greatest masterpieces of the psychological impacts and horrors of war.  Director Francis Ford Coppola (director of “The Godfather” films) took major risks and endured more than most filmmakers would during the production.  He faced everything from budget problems, a civil war in the filming country, his main star having a heart attack and his other main star being disruptive and uncooperative.  The film was the biggest challenge of Coppola’s career but in the end, it paid off.

“Apocalypse Now” is based on Joseph Conrad’s novel “Heart of Darkness” and takes place during the Vietnam War.  The movie stars Martin Sheen as Captain Benjamin Willard who is sent on a mission deep into the jungles of Cambodia in search of a Colonel who went rogue in a remote village.  Willard’s mission:  to “terminate” the Colonel…“terminate with extreme prejudice.”  The movie is a journey into the deep depths of the chaos of war and slowly the Captain and his crew reach the remote village, but the losses along the way are extreme.

The movie is entertaining as a war film but it takes a deeper, more symbolic stance on war.  Willard not only travels into the depths of the jungle but he also has a personal journey into the depths of the darkness of his heart.  It is a masterpiece with many memorable sequences, including one where an airborne infantry attacks a Viet Cong settlement to the tune of Richard Wagner’s “Ride of the Valkyries.” The cinematography is eerily realistic and impacting.  The editing, sound, costumes are all believable.  The acting is flawless.

The original was released in 1979 and received two Academy Awards for cinematography and for sound.  It also received a total of eight nominations, including Best Picture.  “Apocalypse” is, in my view, one of the great filmmaking achievements of all time.  It never misses a beat and that’s why when director Francis Ford Coppola released a new cut of the film in 2001, entitled “Apocalypse Now Redux,” I was adamant about watching it.

The updated version features over 45 minutes of additional scenes that were left out of the original.  A few of these scenes do add to the film but the majority of the scenes, including a 20 minute sequence with a French plantation, are not necessary and do not add to the greatness of the film.  However, the newly cleaned up footage even more stunning than before.  “Redux” is by no means a bad movie, in fact it’s just as mesmerizing as the original, but some of the new footage may feel a bit drawn out and when you’re dealing with a three and a half hour movie, longer isn’t always better.

THE GRADES:

Apocalypse Now: A+

Apocalypse Now Redux: A-

Das Boot (1982) / Das Boot: The Director’s Cut (1997)

Original: 149 min. / Cut: 209 min.

In 1982, director Wolfgang Peterson released a motion picture that revolutionized the way war films are made.  His stunning and claustrophobic film “Das Boot” is a brilliant war film that focuses on the mission of a German U-boat crew during World War II.  Almost the entire duration of the movie is filmed in a tiny, closed off submarine, giving the viewer a real sense of closed-in paranoia that the crews of these ships felt.  Also, the fact that it’s filmed entirely in German with English subtitles makes it so authentic that I often forgot I was watching a movie…it’s that good.  The original 1981 film received six Academy Award nominations and rave reviews from the critics.

The film opens as a crew of German sailors prepares to depart on a dangerous voyage in the Atlantic Ocean between England and the mainland of Europe.  Many sequences of the film are completely silent as the crew nervously sits in deafening silence in order to avoid being heard on the sonar of the Allied ships.  The footage of battle sequences is intensely powerful and makes the heart race.  The acting is extremely convincing and with a shocking ending that the audience didn’t see coming, “Das Boot” is a great filmmaking achievement.

The original version of the film was two hours and 30 minutes long, but in 1997, Peterson released a three and a half hour version of the film that included more than an hour of unseen footage.  This is one of the rare instances where the Director’s Cut is actually better than the original.  The 1981 version is great (and extremely rare to find without being accompanied with the 1997 version in a two-disk DVD set) but it lacks much of the drawn out suspenseful sequences that the 1997 version has.  The new version  used the footage that benefited the storyline and left out even more footage that Peterson saw as detrimental to the final version of the film.  I suggest the newly restored 1997 version of the film over the 1981 version but either way, I don’t think anyone will be disappointed.  The ONLY challenge: reading subtitles for over three hours.  However, it sounds harder than it is.  The German language really creates a genuine atmosphere and the film benefits from it.

THE GRADES:

1981 Version: A

1997 Version: A+

Dances with Wolves (1990) / The Director’s Cut (2004)

Original: 181 min. / Cut: 236 min.

One of my earliest memories of films was going to see “Dances with Wolves” with my parents and sister in our living room.  The film had been out on “VHS” for many years but my parents thought I was old enough to handle the mature themes and that I would enjoy it.  They were right.  After I saw Kevin Costner’s film (of which he starred, directed and produced), I wanted to be a renegade Union soldier traveling through the Great Plains.  Needless to say, this “dream” did not come true, but the movie had a lasting impact on me.  I may have seen “Dances with Wolves” over ten times in the course of my life.

“Dances” is the story of a Union soldier during the Civil War, named John Dunbar, who abandons his post and travels westward in search of something else.  Along the way, he meets up with a Native American tribe and slowly becomes a welcomed member of that tribe.  He falls in love with a white woman who was found by the Sioux tribe.  The movie deals eloquently with the conflict between white settlers and Native American tribes and the consequences that came from those events.  It is also a personal story of one man’s self-discovery.  Costner’s film features a memorable and stunningly powerful buffalo hunt sequence that cannot be missed.  The 1990 version went on to win seven Academy Awards, including Best Picture and Director for Costner.  It was a landmark motion picture in modern epic filmmaking.

Then, in 2004, Costner decided to release a definitive and complete version of the film with over an hour of added footage.  The original movie was about three hours long, which means that the new version was about…four hours long.  Epic films are notorious for being long and often drawn out, but this is not always a bad thing. However, I’ve always felt the original “Dances” was complete and long enough.  The added material is good but not great.  It sometimes feels drawn out and makes it seem like there’s a forced effort to make the picture longer.  It’s not a terrible Director’s Cut but the original is significantly better.

THE GRADES:

1990 Version: A

2004 Version: B+

FOR MORE INFORMATION, click on the links below:

Apocalypse Now

Das Boot

Dances with Wolves

When I was five years old, I distinctly remember going to the mall with my mom to see a movie.  I wouldn’t stop raving about Flashdance, and was broken-hearted when she said, “No.”  (Back then, I didn’t know it was a rated-R film inspired by the true story of a female welder/stripper in Toronto.)

Interestingly, I never saw Flashdance until I was a college sophomore.  Wow, what a corny plot: Alex Owens (Jennifer Beals), an 18-year-old who lives alone in a converted warehouse, is a welder at a steel mill by day and a bar dancer at night.  She shacks up with Nick Hurley-her boss at the steel mill (who happens to have connections at the esteemed dance academy she wants to attend)-trains with her mentor/coach (who ironically dies a couple days before her audition), nails her audition, and apparently gets accepted (though I’m not exactly sure because the ending scene just show her running out of the building, with a smile, into Nick’s loving arms).  No wonder this opened to poor reviews.  Yet and still, it was a box office smash and grossed $100+ million worldwide.

I also remember hearing Michael Sembello’s Grammy Award-winning song, “Maniac,” on the radio.  (Back then, I didn’t know it was originally written about a serial killer and the lyrics were adjusted for the film.)  But what I really love is its music video.  Sure, Irene Cara’s “Flashdance…What a Feeling” won a slew of awards-including an Oscar and a Golden Globe-but nothing beats the scenes of Alex’s body double running in place during dance practice, those ridiculous closeups of the side of her butt cheek, or that glorious slowmo leap through the air.

As an adult, I can appreciate what the film accomplished but yep, it definitely wasn’t suitable for me as a young child.

“Maniac” music video

Did you know:

The role of Alex was turned down by Melanie Griffith, and Beals beat out two other finalists (including Demi Moore) for the lead.  Gene Simmons (yes, of KISS) rejected the role of Alex’s boss/boyfriend Nick, which was secured by Michael Nouri.  Kevin Costner was the runner-up for this part.

Irene Cara penned the “Flashdance…What a Feeling” lyrics en route to the studio the day she recorded the track.

The music video for “Maniac” was a trailblazer, as it was the first to use only movie scenes.

Alex’s off-the-shoulder sweatshirt actually came about when Beals accidentally shrunk the shirt in the wash, and subsequently cut off the collar so it could fit over her head.

“You better pump.” – Marcus Sommers

From now on fridays will be devoted to a quick quote and shot from the classic movie where two brothers challenge the road. And life itself.

Some movies are born great. Some movies achieve greatness over time. And some movies are such trainwrecks of unintentional comedy, flimsy set design, and terrible CGI that you become mesmerized by your television – lost in a cavalcade of overacting, porn stars trying to go mainstream, the word ‘fuck’ being used in all its grammatical applications, and non sequitors starring Steven Seagal – and awaken two hours later feeling oddly entertained enough that you mistakenly watch the film AGAIN whenever it’s on.

The following list is a tribute to those films that are so bad they’re good. Each of these cinematic tragedies are reminders that Hollywood truly is the epicenter of all drug induced ideas. To make the list, the film must’ve been mainstream, because let’s face it, there’s a lot of trash out there that doesn’t see worldwide releases. These are the best of the best…films that somehow made it past their studios Quality Control division and onto the silver screen in your neighborhood, only to be critically flame-broiled and yet somehow beloved…classics?

This list is brought you by ‘Plan 9 From Outer Space’ and Sand – It’s everywhere, get used to it:

10. Batman and Robin (1997)

Joel Schumacher should be congratulated. He managed to make Batman more homoerotic than dear Dr. Fredric Wertham: The nippled Batsuit received an upgrade featuring  pre-wedgied, assless-chaps-looking armor. Combine this with Uma Thurman’s idea of acting (remember, she’d just made ‘The Avengers’ that same year, another honorary member of this list) and a ‘Batman on Ice’ segment and you’ve got a lethal cocktail of suckage. Never fear, folks! The Governator is here to turn this movie into campy one-liner glory! Just when you’re reaching for that remote to save your eyes from over-exposure to inexplicable amounts of fuchsia lights, Arnold swoops in – sporting enough chrome to make Jay-Z’s Cadillac jealous – to drop another gleefully awful ice-themed punchline.

Also, why does the freeze gun have a lock and load noise?

9. Snakes on a Plane (2006)

Hollywood Steps to Guaranteed Film Success: 1) Hire Samuel L. Jackson. 2) Give Samuel L. Jackson a gun. 3) Let Samuel L. Jackson add to his collection of priceless film quotes by yelling about things more incoherently than the Ultimate Warrior:

8. Lake Placid (1999)

A completely forgettable film having something to do with a rather large Croco-Gator hiding in some idealistic lake, ‘Lake Placid’ is saved from movie hell by Betty White. Yes, the ‘kooky’ Golden Girl is your savior by doing what she does best: play the innocent old lady who’s actually Nucking Futs (“patent pending) crazy. In this instance, Ms. White can be seen feeding cows to our Gator hero while whimsically discussing the weather with the sheriff.

7. Flash Gordon (1980)

IMDb’s Plot Summary: “A football player and his friends travel to the planet Mongo and find themselves fighting the tyrant, Ming the Merciless, to save Earth.” What could POSSIBLY make this film any better? Well, George Lucas wanted to direct this film, but sadly missed the opportunity and had to instead make some silly films featuring singing teddy bears, walking carpets, and trashcans on wheels. Dennis Hopper, YOUR OVERACTING VILLIAN OF THE CENTURY, sadly turned down the chance to play Dr. Zarkov…but all is well, because 80’s rock sensation QUEEN did the soundtrack!

6. Waterworld (1995)

SPEAKING of Dennis Hopper, I present to you Kevin Costner’s global warming disaster flick (as opposed to his equally bad nuclear holocaust film). At it’s time, this was the most expensive film ever made. I can definitely see where all the money went to, such as welding all that expensive trash can metal onto black matte painted jet skis. This movie is THREE HOURS LONG, and yet you can’t turn away from it. Why? Because Kevin Costner drinks his own piss three minutes in, and it’s all downhill from there:

5. Judge Dredd (1995)

No words need to describe this film aside from I AM THE LAW:

4. Street Fighter (1994)

A movie about a game…BAD…?!?!?! Is this even possible?! What about all those great Uwe Bowe films like ‘House of the Dead’, ‘Bloodrayne’, and ‘In the Name of the King’? And who can forget the Super Mario Brothers…It’s true: Video game based films are notoriously well known for being absolutely eye-gouging, jaw-droppingly bad, and ‘Street Fighter’ is no different. The tragedy that is the film is only further enhanced by the realization that it is Raul Julia’s – the lovable Mr. Addams – final film before he passed away. Though Julia does his best to save this movie, the true hero of our film is Jean Claude Van Damm and his string of flexing monologues scattered throughout.

3. Mannequin (1987)

It’s a movie starring Kim Cattrall as a mannequin that comes to life for the lonely artist that lovingly built her who falls in love with her and saves a department store owned by Estelle Getty by designing hip window displays with his flamboyantly gay best friend. Not crazy enough for you yet? Did I mention that Cattrall is actually an Egyptian princess? Let’s kick it up a notch!

2.Howard the Duck (1986)

God Bless George Lucas for this one. He had HUNDREDS of comic book characters to select from – any of which Marvel, DC, et al would’ve gladly allowed the god of all things Science Fiction to direct – and he chose to slam a bunch of midgets into a oversized rubber duck costume and attempt to save the world. If there was EVER a film that needed a rerelease with enhanced special effects, it’s this one. Please, George, stop destroying the land of the Jedi and bring back this Duck in full CG glory!

1. Starship Troopers (1997)

This is, hands down, the greatest bad movie of all time. Casper Van Dien’s chin deserved an Oscar for carrying Casper Van Dien’s dead weight through this 90 minute romp. Michael Ironside plays Michael Ironside with a gun. Gary Busey’s son is only mildly aggrevating, and hey, any film with NPH automatically is a classic. I have one question for you citizen: Are you doing your part?

Realidade e imaginação tem o mesmo estofo. O que observamos no dia-a-dia e o tipo de coisa que vemos através do olho do artista são feitos do mesmo material: a imagem. É curioso como algo que sempre deveria despertar desconfiança talvez seja o único lastro confiável para se fazer uma avaliação ou crítica. Na forma do puro clichê ou de uma observação nada mais do que vulgar, algo como o conflito entre a essência e a aparência parece ser uma preocupação descartável.

O contato cotidiano com a realidade nos destitui dos significados mais profundos que a vida pode ter. A visão de um filme confina o encanto artístico a uma sala de cinema. A duas horas em média.  Brian De Palma subverte a superficialidade da discussão.

Já que o real e o filme são do mesmo estofo porque não dar ao próprio filme o status de uma coisa tão passível de recriação quanto a própria vida. Na sequência do tiroteio, anti-climax desta formidável história de gangsteres, vemos Einsenstein como inspiração. Temos atores em estado de graça. Uma produção intocável.

Este um dos melhores filmes da história do cinema. Merece estar na lista dos 100 maiores.

Assista o trailler

So I watched it again tonight, the first time in at least a year or so. Again, it leaves me spent. I’m noticing it isn’t so much that the movie itself is flawless, but that it deals with this “father-son” type relationship. Watching it for that reason makes it so much more meaningful for me. I can read so much in the facial expressions and body language. I know these thoughts and feelings so personally that the movie becomes … well, very personal. I don’t know how else to say it.

I noticed again how Butch feels so vengeful when he sees the kids in the movie mistreated. I mean, he is going to kill the black man who slaps his grandson. And when he makes the man tell his grandson that he loves him… you see how much he wanted to hear that from his own father. It’s like his deepest hearts desire. I mean, when he is dying, Butch pulls out the postcard from his Dad and reads it as he has done so many times before. He has been waiting and dreaming of getting back with his Dad all these years. He is even driving to Alaska in his mind. He is driving to where his Dad is. I can just imagine how abandoned he has felt all of his life. As he rotted away in prison, how totally alone in the world he was.

Phillip was such a balm for him in this whole ordeal although he may not have realized it. He seemed to be locked away in his own personal painful history. It must have been a great change for this kid to look up to him. It was someone to be with. Phillip was so like himself in that needy way. I noticed when Philip saw him having “sex” with the woman, Butch couldn’t handle it. He stopped and left. He must have remembered how he felt seeing or at least knowing his own Mom was a whore and how ugly seeing sex must have been to him. He didn’t want to repeat all of that for Phillip.

I think the most touching is the final few scenes when Phillip doesn’t want to leave him. He keeps getting right up on him. He turns back to help him so they won’t shoot him. There is so much love hunger there. It seemed easier for Butch to let go, I think because he had been letting go his whole life. I don’t think he believed good would ever really happen. It was a grand gesture for him to give Phillip his postcard from his Dad. He knew he was at the end. He gave Phillip the most precious thing he had.

So, I’m thinking I may buy my Dad a copy of this movie for Christmas. He would never in a million years get it. It’s a bit too late anyway. He would never see the connection.

I love this picture of them both. Phillip is secure to some degree being near Butch. He looks at home.

Tudo começou com a minha avó, que deu à luz minha mãe: a CARA da Audrey Hepburn. Pois o verdadeiro clone da eterna Holly Golightly se casou com meu pai, que segundo uma antiga empregada da mesma avó, parece com o Jerry Adriani. Uma grande inverdade, sem falar que o Jerry Adriani é de uma cafonice sem tamanho.

Se tiverem que comparar meu pai com alguém, que seja com o Jay Leno, pelo menos, 20 kg mais magro. O Jay Leno não pode ver o Giannechini na televisão que logo fala do João Paulo, meu irmão. Durante um capítulo da novela, o personagem do ator tomava sorvete de creme e meu pai comentou: “até isso têm em comum!”.

Já a Patrícia, misto de Jessica Alba com Hillary Duff, disse uma vez que a Carina lembra um pouco a Madonna. Manu, que, já disseram, tem os traços de Penelope Cruz, refutou com um certo deboche: “Então o Pedro é o Tarcísio Meira!”

Todos riram, claro. Ainda mais porque sabem que o Pedro parece mesmo com o Ricky Martin. E disso nem a Thaís – que não costuma concordar com essas semelhanças mas que gostou quando a chamaram de Daniela Cicarelli na porta da balada – pode discordar com muita firmeza.

Eu, toda vez que vejo Sheldon Cooper do seriado Big Bang Theory, lembro do Rafa, mas nunca me esqueço de contar do dia em que o vendedor de queijo coalho me chamou de Malu Mader na praia de Porto Seguro. Fato esse muito contraditório, já que desde que nasci, ouço que sou a “cópia cuspida e escarrada” do Caio, meu irmão mais velho. E ele, como sempre disse a minha avó, parece mesmo com o Kevin Costner “assim… meio na penumbra”.

Ou alors quelque chose comme ça… cela signifie “Danse avec les Loups” en langue Sioux.

Ce sera le film de la semaine, Danse avec les Loups, de et avec Kevin Costner, en 1990. Un film vu avec ma tante (qui m’avait pris en photo tout petiot, laquelle photo figure sur le prochain recueil de poésie) dans ce petit cinéma d’auteurs appelé Le Katorza. Sièges trop serrés les uns des autres, odeurs fortes de sueur et de pop-corn. Le prix était encore en francs et c’était super moins cher… ! Bref !

A chaque fois que je regarde ce film, cela éveille en moi une envie irrépressible d’aller dans les grands espaces, de parcourir des lieux incroyables, de partir à la rencontre de l’Autre. Ce film est un tel hymne à la liberté, selon moi, que cela titille mes sens, un besoin inhérent à ma personnalité.

Ce film, on dirait un livre-fleuve tiré des meilleurs scénarii de creative writing (atelier d’écriture) avec la spécialité de nature creative… Désolé pour la digression littéraire. Mais bon, mon écriture devait en être imprégnée et elle l’est, assurément. Mais en France, le genre n’est pas super prisé… dommage !

Je me souviens de cette relation unique quand, vers la fin du film, “Cheveux dans le vent” (nom Sioux) hurle sur sa falaise à Kevin Costner son amitié, ce cri incroyable et déchirant devant toute la communauté, “Jomani tatanka oatchi!”. La couleur de la peau a laissé la place aux sentiments, à la sincérité des relations, ils se sont reconnus. Ils sont amis.

J’aime ce genre de récit, j’aime que l’on exacerbe ces sentiments. Il y a quelque chose de grand, d’absolu. Et cela me fait du bien.

Si seulement je pouvais écrire de la sorte, tout du moins m’en approcher…

Field of Dreams

This has been a weird week.  There was some great baseball in the World Series and I even nailed the prediction for it.  Just take a look back if you don’t believe me.  I have never gone public with a World Series prediction and I am pretty pleased that my predictions were pretty good considering that I am neither the Prophet nor the Son of the Prophet.  Neither am I infallible like the Pope being that I am just a miscreant Priest and member of the Church of Baseball, Harbor Park Parish where I have my season ticket in Section 102, Row B, Seat 2.

The Series was good for me, I really didn’t care who won, except that I predicted the Yankees in six based on match ups, statistics and numbers.  I’m a Giants, A’s and Orioles fan and as I sit here in my O’s hat and sweatshirt I can honestly say that I didn’t have a dog in the fight.  However to be right in analyzing the playoffs and World Series is pretty cool.  Maybe someday I will be a real sportswriter or broadcaster and get to sit opposite Jay Mariotti and Woody Paige on Around the Horn.

However, the series helped distract me in some ways for my trip home to see what I can do to help my brother with my parents.  I don’t look forward to the trip; the airports get to me now.  Thankfully I’m not going through Atlanta or Washington Dulles.  At least O’Hare has decent food and beer.  I guess the thing that gets me the most about going home this time is that my mom wants me to help go through possessions, not paperwork.  I’m thinking about years of memories that she has kept; family heirlooms and the just plain shit in some cases.  The stuff really doesn’t matter to me but it will be taxing.  Likewise the thought of seeing my dad again in his decrepit state, shrunken and mostly demented from Alzheimer’s disease is painful to think about.

Yesterday morning after my on call shift I went up for my weigh in.  I gained 25 pounds since the spring, I knew that going in, I knew that I would not make the weight.  Most of the weigh came from stopping by Krispy Kreme on the way home from Harbor Park, picking up a dozen hot and fresh glazed and downing 3-4 or more with a beer before going to bed.  Of course the reason I did this was because I was emotionally spent, couldn’t sleep and couldn’t pull myself away from work.  Add stress, anxiety, no sleep, overwork, bad diet and little exercise  together and you get fat…well I get fat, I don’t know about you.  This is the first time in 28 years in the military that I have been officially fat.  I’ve always been close to the limit because the Deity Herself did not endue me with a couple of additional inches of height to help me as the military is run by the tall skinny mafia and the standards reflect that.   Until yesterday I had always made it sometimes by the skin of my teeth, but always made it.  When I was in better shape I would crush the physical fitness part of the assessment even if I was close to the weight limit.  Today after sleeping through my alarm and barely making it in to work I did the Physical Readiness Test and despite having only done 3 sessions of PT since the end of April I did better than a lot of young people, I passed, not to my usually standard of near perfection, but passing.  My diet has already been adjusted; my work schedule and duties have been rearranged to help me recover from Iraq and my return.  I’m doing more supervisory and administrative work vice the heavy clinical work in ICU.  This will give me the time that I need to do what I have not done since my return from Iraq that is to take care of me.  So I do have a sense of humor about this, I’m not going to stay fat and I am going to get my physical edge back.  I’m old but not done.  After the weigh in I thought about the episode of Third Rock from the Sun where Dick Solomon, played by John Lithglow gets fat and joins a weight loss organization called the Fat Losers. I have included the links to the episode on You Tube here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OgP2h1×2EZc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-x0kzALQPU4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q2tYkwhqqxs

I will keep you abreast of my journey to take this off and turn myself into a bald version of Arnold.  If anyone wants to take that journey with me let me know.  We’ll be the real “Fat Losers” and kick some ass.

Grieving Soldiers at Fort Hood

The shooting at Fort Hood yesterday shook me and the Abbess pretty bad.  For me it hit my sense of safety and security was rocked as a Moslem Army Major brutally attacked and killed 12 soldiers and an Army civilian and wounded 30 more soldiers.  I’ve mentioned in my Fort Hood updates more about how it hit me so I won’t rehash that here except that I started emotionally melting down a bit as I watched the coverage which I could not let go of.  I thought of friends that I know there and my times about Fort Hood when I was in the Army, and the thought that an officer who swore the same oath that I have committed such an atrocity in the name of his religion really got me.  If he had been an enlisted man I think my reaction would have been different, somehow when I learned that it was an officer, a psychiatrist and a Moslem floored me.  Frankly in my world officers don’t do this.  Today I was able to get with Elmer the Shrink and talk. That helped. My boss and our deputy helped take care of me today and yesterday.  On the way home I stopped by Harbor Park to take in the view of the field and relax.  Thankfully the good folks in the office allow me to do this.  It helped a lot.

My Field of Dreams: Harbor Park

After a nice dinner with the Abbess at Gordon Biersch I did what I almost always do after such a couple of days and retreated into the world of magic that is baseball.  I put on For the Love of the Game and Field of Dreams.  Somehow those help me.  The lead character played by Kevin Costner, Billy Chapel pitches a perfect game and reminisces about his life and career.  It reminds me of possibilities even for me and Field of Dreams reminds me of all that is good, even in spite of all the evil that the world.  The baseball season may be over, but the game reaches me when nothing else can.  I looked at the diamond surrounded by the cornfields and remember when I drove to Iowa and made the trip to Dyersville just to play catch on the Field of Dreams.  I hope that when I go home that somehow I can help ease my dad’s pain in some way, and maybe just maybe have him back for a few minutes.

My last Visit with Dad in May

Thank you for your prayers and encouragement.  Please keep praying for the victims and all those affected at Fort Hood.  Pray that the violent and senseless act of Major Hasan will not beget more violence.

Peace,

Padre Steve+

If there’s anything Hollywood loves more than counting money and pandering to demographic groups, it’s pandering to a known demographic by cranking out a sequel. Here’s what the major studios are reheating for us in the upcoming months.

For the sequel, Kilmer has asked for "better hair;" "more expressive mask."

Heat 2: The Robbening
With most of the principal characters dead, the sequel focuses on Val Kilmer’s character, who was last seen ditching his wife and daughter for a life of not going to prison for several years. Al Pacino is back, obsessed with hunting down the “one that got away.”

Directing duties have been passed on to Lars Van Trier, whose unconventional filmmaking and confrontational style saw Val Kilmer participate in some improvised (and often, completely nude) bank robberies, for which he is currently serving 20 years at Lompoc Correctional Facility.

Lars Von Triers hails it as “provocative, dangerous cinema.”

Kevin Costner briefly considers "better hair;" first attempts at planned "Expression C."

They Still Call Me “Dances with Wolves”
After a nearly 20-year stretch of failed vanity projects and forgettable roles, Kevin Costner returns to the welcoming arms of his most successful vanity project. He reprises his role as Dances With Wolves, the sole enlightened white man in existence.

The story follows his purchase of a failing business in South Dakota and his unflinching battle with decades old anti-gambling laws. Costner grants himself ample screen time to explore his character, including several topical monologues which recall Steven Segal’s triumphant work in On Deadly Ground. Written and directed by Kevin Costner. Additional screenplay work by Paul Verhoeven and Joe Eszterhas.

Time Magazine calls it “a triumphant retread, full of Costnerian hubris.”

Carrie Fisher's requests for "better hair;" "non-related love interest" vetoed by George Lucas. He did, however, turn her character lesbian.

Star Wars Episode 9: The Twilight of the Revolution
Picking up where episode six left off (and skipping two more episodes, presumably to be retconned in later), with the Death Star destroyed (again) and the Empire defeated, Episode 9 rejoins the characters as they live out their remaining years.

• Watch Han Solo makes an embarrassment of himself in an Aldreraan retirement community, as his randy exploits never manage to make the ladies forget that he shoots first.
• Chewbacca returns to his home planet, only to be set upon and dismembered by his own species, who react violently to the alien smell of “human” on him.
• Luke Skywalker is faced with the realization that the rebellion never had a solid severance package in place and is forced to perform Jedi “magic” at birthday parties and bar mitzvahs to make ends meet.
• Leia never gets over being unable to conceive and spends her remaining years banging random helmet-wearing freaks in an effort to confront her “Daddy” issues.
• Lando finds himself profiled into a 10-year sentence for a liquor store holdup.
• R2-D2 and C-3PO are finally married after leaving Tatooine’s restrictive political climate for the relatively more relaxed Endor. Things end badly for the married couple when C-3PO catches R2-D2 fellating (?) a power washer.
• On a brighter note, Jar Jar Binks is also dismembered due to his “human” smell shortly after the opening credits.

FOX-TV says “full of Lucas’ patented heart and razor-sharp dialog.” CBS-TV says “Big Chill meets On Golden Pond in a fanboy’s basement.”

Cameron offers to trade three Oscars for "better hair;" "artistic merit."

Titanic 2: The King of the World
James Cameron returns to the icy, money-choked waters of his greatest success, Titanic. Borrowing liberally from Clive Cussler’s Raise the Titanic (and being sued in the process) and his own dementia, Cameron presents the story of an eccentric billionaire who wishes to prove that the Titanic, with the proper level of sobriety and nude paintings, could have made that voyage successfully.

Cameron freely admits that the main character (Jim Camber) is loosely based on himself. Camber’s abrasive ego and Scrooge McDuck-esque piles of money soon find him several thousand feet below the surface, raising the Titanic for another maiden voyage.

Camber raises the Titanic and follows the fateful route. Tragedy strikes when the drunken Irish stowaways manage to rip through the hulls during an out-of-control party/car bombing. Ironically (or not), the Titanic returns to the depths at nearly the same spot as the original catastrophe.

James Cameron tops his last outing by using a combination of green screen and depression sufferers to simulate the sinking ship’s last moments. Viewers will be unable to escape the haunting images of the many extras clinging to the nearly vertical deck for life, which suddenly seems bright and livable when cold, icy death is staring you in the face. Listen closely for screams of “Fuck you, James!” and “For the love of God, where are the stuntmen?”

Entertainment Weekly calls it “a tour de force of cinéma vérité, proving just how many lives Cameron is willing to sacrifice for artless commerce (883, at last count).”

-CLT

kyle and i got off of work early one day and decided to get $3 margaritas at blockheads which eventually turned into this:

red-nosed bulldog (the drink, not kyle)

just a warning, this was probably the grossest thing i have ever drank.  but i did it—aaaaaand i’m never doing it again. (crunk ain’t dead.)

what are the ingredients?  1. frozen margarita 2. extra shot of tequila 3. sangria 4. upside down corona bottle.

let’s just say it got the job done and after that kyle and i found ourselves walking to the park with a dragonfly (what the hell.)

what up dawg?

i'm ready for my closeup

want to see the trailer to a really bad kevin costner movie?  click the dragonfly but don’t say i didn’t warn you….

erschienen im Weser Kurier am 20. Oktober 2009,

Gestern sind dann ab 13.30 Uhr die Journalisten in das Hotel eingefallen. Auch das Radio-Bremen-Team von Buten un Binnen hat ein Interview mit dem Hollywood-Star bekommen. Schon vor dem Gespräch richten Techniker und Kameraleute die Kameras in Position und stellen das Licht und den Ton ein. Dann musste das Team den Raum wieder verlassen und im Gang auf ein paar Stühlen Platz nehmen. Die Anspannung ist deutlich zu spüren. Es passiert ja auch nicht alle Tage, dass ein Costner in der Hansestadt ist. Warten, die Interview-Fragen nochmal durchgehen, warten – wie beim Arzt stehen die Stühle im Gang an der Wand. Dann plötzlich schlendert Kevin Costner an den Journalisten vorbei. Der dichte Teppich hat seine Schritte gedämpft. Ein lässiges ‘Hi’ zu den Moderatorinnen und dann ist er auch schon wieder weg. Ein unwirklicher Moment, und das Warten geht weiter.

Keine Frage: Costner sieht gut aus, die 54 Lebensjahre stehen ihm. Er ist braun gebrannt, lächelt charmant, trägt Jeans, einen dunklen Mantel, Wollschal und Sonnenbrille. Albernerweise auch in den Hotelgängen. Aber gut, das ist eben Hollywood.

Eine weitere halbe Stunde vergeht. Dann sind die Kollegen von Radio Bremen an der Reihe. Das Team darf endlich in den Interview-Raum im Parkhotel. Ein letzter Technik-Check, ein wenig Make-up für Moderatorin Jule, dann betritt Kevin Costner den Raum. Er lächelt und nimmt die Sonnenbrille ab und steckt sich das kleine Mikrofon an. Das Interview läuft gut. Costner ist höflich, aber bestimmt. Deutsch sprechen will er nicht. Er kann es auch nicht, sagt er. Auch wenn seine Frau eine Deutsche ist. Sie sei in Kalifornien geboren und eher ein echtes Surfer-Girl. Und dann erzählt er vom Freimarkt. Er sei wirklich da gewesen, habe getrunken und gefeiert und sei sogar ‘bumpercar’ (Autoscooter) gefahren. Erkannt habe ihn kaum jemand. Wer hätte auch damit gerechnet, dass ein Oscar-Gewinner auf den Freimarkt geht? Wohl niemand. Und erkannt hätte ihn sicher auch keiner.

Genauso wenig dürfte die Frau an der Ampel vor dem Bahnhof darüber nachgedacht haben, dass Kevin Costner in dem schwarzen Wagen hinter ihr sitzt. Denn nach dem Interview geht es für Kevin Costner direkt ins Rathaus zu Bürgermeister Jens Böhrnsen. Der Schauspieler muss sich beeilen. Böhrnsen hat für den Termin nur 20 bis 30 Minuten eingeplant. Doch obwohl Costner vor seinem Hotel einigen Fans noch Autogramme gibt und auch ihnen vom ‘bumpercar’ fahren erzählt, fährt sein Wagen pünktlich um 15.30 Uhr vor dem Rathaus vor. Und auch hier warten Fans vor dem Eingang.

In der oberen Rathaushalle liegt das Goldene Buch auf dem hölzernen Tisch bereit. ‘Kevin Costner – Oscar-Preisträger – 20. Oktober 2009′ steht auf dem Zettel, der in dem Buch klebt. Davor haben sich etliche Journalisten mit Foto- und Video-Kameras versammelt. Wieder liegt Spannung in der Luft. Dann betreten der Bürgermeister und Kevin Costner den Raum. Die 600 Jahre alte Obere Halle berührte den Kalifornier sichtlich: ‘Vor fast so langer Zeit ist meine Familie aus Deutschland in die USA ausgewandert’, erzählt er dem Bürgermeister. Der zeigt ihm daraufhin die Güldenkammer. ‘Wunderbar’, entfährt es Costner. Am Ende betritt er den Balkon und schaut hinab auf den kleinen Freimarkt.

Erst dann geht er hinüber zum Holztisch und nimmt in dem großen Stuhl davor Platz. Costner greift zum silbernen Stift und setzt an. Langsam und bedächtig wählt er seine Worte: ‘Vielen Dank für die Ehre. Ich freue mich darauf, mit meiner Familie in diese wunderschöne Stadt zurückzukehren. Mit allem Respekt. Kevin Costner.’ Jens Böhrnsen schaut im schmunzelnd über die Schulter. Irgendwie scheint ihm der Medienrummel um den Schauspieler ein wenig zu viel zu sein. Auch nach dem Eintrag ins Goldene Buch schüttelt er nur den Kopf, als die Journalisten den Kalifornier die Treppen bis nach unten verfolgen.

Costner hat es wieder eilig. Er muss ins Musical-Theater zum Sound-Check. Auch ein sogenanntes ‘Meet and Great’ mit geladenen Gästen der Kooperationspartner ist dort noch vor dem Konzert geplant. Also steigt er exakt 20 Minuten nach seiner Ankunft am Rathaus wieder in den Wagen, der direkt vor der Tür parkt. Immernoch stehen Fans da, in der Hoffnung einen Blick auf ihren Star zu ergattern. Eine Dame hat besonders viel Glück. Costner wirft ihr durch die Autoscheibe einen Handkuss zu. Und sie bekommt sichtlich weiche Knie.

Beim Soundcheck will Costner allein sein. Ein Konzert in kuscheliger Club-Atmosphäre zu geben, ist genau sein Stil. So hatte er es sich vorgestellt. Laut einem Bremen-1-Interview habe er nie Musik gemacht, um Platten zu verkaufen oder im Studio zu stehen. Er liebe den direkten Kontakt zum Publikum. Aber um ehrlich zu sein: Kevin Costner kann als Musiker in Deutschland keine großen Hallen füllen. Selbst am Vorabend des Konzertes waren gerade einmal 1000 Tickets von 1400 verkauft.

Um 21 Uhr ist es soweit. Nach seiner Vorband, der zierlichen, aber stimmgewaltigen Irin Jennifer Clarke, fährt eine Leinwand herunter und dasPublikum bekommt das, womit es nicht gerechnet hat: Einen minutenlangen Zusammenschnitt mit Szenen aus Costner-Filmen. Nach fünf Minuten erklingen Pfiffe und Buh-Rufe. Die Bremer wollen Costner singen hören. Also tritt er auf die Bühne und begrüßt das Publikum mit den Worten: ‘Vielen Dank, dass ihr all die Jahre ins Kino gegangen seid.’ Und kurz darauf: ‘Aber heute sind wir hier, um Musik zu machen. Seid ihr bereit?’ Die Menge im Saal ruft: ‘Ja!’. Costner: ‘Ich auch.’

Das Radio-Bremen-Interview sehen Sie heute in der Talk-Sendung ‘Ansichten’ auf Radio Bremen TV ab 18.45 Uhr und eine komplette Konzert-Kritik lesen Sie morgen auf unseren Kultur-Seiten.

Recently Sabio did a write-up on one of Clint Eastwood’s Movies. The other day, I happened to watch another movie of his, A Perfect World, again directed by him, and in which he acts as some kind of cop.

Butch (Kevin Costner) is the main character in this movie. The whole thing seems to be a great exercise in mis-communication, or lack of sufficient communication.

Butch grew up in a whore-house; his father was a criminal, while his mother was a prostitute. Butch murdered someone when he was only 10. It was later revealed in the movie that he did it only to protect his mother. And later his mother died (of suicide? can’t really remember), and Butch was destined to be returned to his biological father, which would lead to a life of hard crime, or so Clint Eastwood (CE) thought.

In all his wisdom, CE sent Butch to juvie for a minor misdeed, in order to keep Butch away from his father. Butch does not know anything about all this. This later leads to a poignant scene when CE volunteers himself as to go forward to ‘negotiate’ with Butch for the release of the child whom everyone assumed Butch had kidnapped, and Butch asks CE,”Haven’t I seen you somewhere before?” Getting ahead of myself.

In other words, CE had always been the guardian angel of Butch, floating around without Butch knowing anything about it at all. It all ended tragically when a stupid, trigger-happy sniper shot Butch without CE’s authorization.

Butch was escaping from prison, when his colleague wanted to molest a child, and Butch had to shoot him. That was only the second person that Butch had ever shot, but his partner-in-crime had shot someone else in their escape, whom people again suspected Butch of being the culprit.

ANYWAY….

Anyway… Butch was just a good person who grew up with the wrong set of parents, but whom everyone mistook as a bad guy, while the FBI agent (Sniper), was a bad guy whom everyone assumed was a good guy. And CE cared for Butch but never showed himself as such to Butch. Which is why I think this movie is all about the lack of information leading to many disastrous consequences.

Of course, I’m not doing justice to Clint Eastwood’s movie, but then that’s only to be expected.

I hope you get to watch it yourself. It’s worth watching.

CE tries to get as close to the reality of life as he can. As brutally honest as he can get, while being entertaining at the same time.

Depois de Kevin Costner é a vez de Russel Crowe viver o principe dos ladrões. Quando questionado sobre o filme antecessor, Crowe diz que “foi como assistir um longo clip do Jon Bon Jovi”. A direção é de Ridley Scott e terá uma abordagem mais realista. As fotos abaixo mostram o ator na personagem. Clique sobre elas para visualizar em tamanho maior.

Realista? O melhor Robin Hood ever é o interpretado por Errol Flynn em As Aventuras de Robin Hood, de 1938. Imagine Crowe dentro de uma malha e convencendo? Nunca será Crowe, nunca será.

_________________________________________________________________________
Andreia D’Oliveira que  não entende a necessidade de tudo ser pautado em uma visão mais realista. Lembrem-se de Rei Arthur…

Well.

Yesterday I began a list of my personal favorite Westerns of all time. Today, I return to finish the job – once and for all.

First, though, a quick recap. Here’s the first four entries on the list, numbered seven to four:

7. Young Guns.

The Brat Pack takes on the legend of Billy the Kid. Emilio Estevez is somehow believable as a murdering sociopath. Kiefer Sutherland continues to be awesome.

6. Silverado.

Kevin Kline and Kevin Costner team up to stop corrupt Brian Dennehy and creepy Jeff Goldblum.

Awesome.

5. Tombstone.

Kurt Russell and Val Kilmer steamroll through some of the most cringe-worthy moments in film history, seemingly through sheer force of awesomeness alone. Michael Biehn is also on hand, once again forcing us all to collectively ask: “What the hell ever happened to Michael Biehn?”

4. Unforgiven.

Clint Eastwood frowns and scowls his way towards redemption and a scheming Gene Hackman, with Morgan Freeman caught somewhere in the middle. Saul Rubinek and Richard Harris are also there for some reason.

And now…THE FINAL THREE.

Three: The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford. (2007)

This is the newest entry on the list, so I’m not sure if it’s properly reached “classic” status yet.

But give it time, friends – it will.

“The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford” was quite possibly my favorite movie of 2007. Very few people saw it. Even less seemed to like it. But I maintain that it is one of the most beautifully epic and gorgeously shot films I have ever witnessed. The movie is true artwork – every detail is carefully crafted for maximum impact. From the cinematography, to the sparse dialogue, to the acting, to the score by indie hero Nick Cave, everything is note perfect.

It’s certainly not a feel good movie, like some other, younger, gunnier films, but that’s okay. It’s not meant to be. While Jesse James certainly had his boyish fun side, his movie isn’t about him. It’s one of the few Jesse James movies out there, I’m sure, that he isn’t the main focus of.

This movie is about Robert Ford.

It’s about Ford, that “dirty little coward, who shot Mr. Howard,” and his tumultuous, sometimes bizarre relationship with James. Ford idolized James, even loved him – but not in a weird way. Just in the way that he wanted to be Jesse James.

Which, I guess is a little weird.

(But, c’mon…who wouldn’t want to be Jesse James?!?)

Casey Affleck plays Ford as a man who seems to be constantly on the verge of a complete meltdown. He has no real personality, no identity. In his mind’s eye, he IS James, or at the very least, James’ partner in crime. Unfortunately, Jesse James doesn’t really see it that way.

Now, I usually hear the same two complaints about this movie. For one, it’s too long. Well, deal with it. This is a grown-up movie for grown-ups. If you can’t sit and watch a movie for three hours without squirming or getting fussy, than too bad. This movie’s not for you. It’s long, yes, but that only adds to the build up. And I’ve never found it slow, either. Leisurely, sure. It takes it’s time to revel in the world it’s created, and the characters who inhabit it. And what interesting characters they are.

The second complaint is that, like “Titanic”, you already know the ending. All right, sure. It’s in the damn title, for Christ’s sake. But again, the movie isn’t about the murder of James…it’s about the journey leading up to the assassination. It wants to examine this frustrating relationship between two vastly different men, one an idol, the other the worshiper, that culminates in murder. The interesting part isn’t that Robert Ford shot Jesse James in the back of the head. The interesting part is why Robert Ford shot Jesse James in the back of the head. And in the movie, when James realizes his defeat, and gives up to dust off that picture, it’s beautiful, sad and heartbreaking – for both men.

Give it another look. The acting is superb all around, with Affleck at the head of the pack, and excellent supporting performances from Pitt and the always dependable Sam Rockwell. And, in a transparent attempt to make me love this movie even more, the lovely Zooey Deschanel also shows up, briefly, near the end.

So it’s also got that going for it. Which is nice.

Two: The Searchers. (1956)

Racism, family, and John Wayne all collide in this epic masterpiece by that master of epic masterpieces, John Ford.

Wayne, a staple of Westerns, stars as Ethan Edwards, a man searching for his lost nieces after they are abducted by Native Americans. Edwards, racist against the Natives even before they destroy his family, sets out to find the girls at any cost.

That cost, as we soon find out, is exorbitantly higher than the audience may initially think; Ethan’s hatred for the Comanche is so severe, that he would rather see his nieces dead then in Native hands. If he can’t save them from death, than at least he can try to save them from the tribe.

The film attempts to examine racism in the Old West, showcasing Ethan’s hatred for the “red man” against the Comanche chief’s racism against the “white man”. Both are extreme in their racism to the point of madness – the chief, Scar, will continue to kill and scalp white men, with no end in sight, in retaliation for his two son’s murders, and Ethan will willfully murder his own niece, rather than see her marry a Comanche.

It’s a dark, dense tale, that is uncommon even now – let alone in the 1950’s, when it was a given that all cowboys were good, all Indians savages.

Wayne is amazing as Edwards. Defiant, aggressive and stubborn, his character grows throughout the film, but only really finds redemption after being pushed to the brink – he only truly becomes human after giving up his own humanity.

It’s a great film – a social message beautifully shot and well acted. Certainly one of Ford’s best, which means it truly must stand tall in the genre. Highly recommended, this is one of the best in the genre.

One: High Noon. (1952)

The only thing more epically, badassingly awesome than the movie “High Noon,” is Gary Cooper, who stars in the movie “High Noon.”

This is number one is right here, folks. And it is awesome.

“High Noon” is a ridiculously awesome movie with a ridiculously awesome concept. Cooper plays Will Kane, the sheriff of a small town, now happily married and planning to retire. Then some dude Kane put away years ago vows revenge on Kane, heads back into town, grabs himself a posse, and wages war on our intrepid lawman.

No problem, right? Just round up some deputies, take these dudes by force, scrub up your badge for the next guy, and high-tail it outta town on the next stagecoach for a weekend honeymoon retreat with your wife at some five-star saloon or something.

WRONG.

The townspeople may admire Kane, but they sure as hell don’t want to step into his shoes. Frank Miller (Ian MacDonald) is one badass dude, and they want nothing to do with him. They suggest the same to Kane. Leave town. Forget Miller. Move on.

But Kane knows better. You deal with bullies by facing them down, not running away. Otherwise, they will hunt you down and haunt you for the rest of your life. So he stays in town. He pins that badge on his vest, and he throws down against Frank Miller and his gang, with no help from anyone but himself. Will Kane vs. THE WORLD. And in REAL TIME.

It’s a great movie that showcases the struggles of doing the right thing vs. doing the easy thing. It presents this argument mostly through dialogue, and characters action prior to the finale – and, in fact, the finale is the only place where any violence or action at all take place. Not your typical Western – especially Back In The Day.

Check it out to find out why I consider it to be the best Western ever made (personally speaking, of course.)

And you’ll also find out why Gary Cooper’s Will Kane is the greatest Western hero of all time.

Well.

That is the list as I see it. I’m sure there will be future lists down the road, but for now…I’m all listed out.

Oh, what the hell. Here’s the honorable mentions list. Check these out too, for a better representation of the genre as a whole:

The Magnificent Seven. (1960)

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. (1969)

Shane.(1953)

Rio Bravo. (1959)

The Wild Bunch. (1969)

Stagecoach. (1939)

Dances with Wolves. (1990)

And yes. I am fully aware that EVERY movie on THIS list is better than “Young Guns.”

REGULATORS!

MOUNT UP!

Well.

So, the baseball season is all but officially over for me. Sour grapes? Maybe. And what do you do with sour grapes?

You make sour wine, get drunk, and bitch about the Yankees some more.

But I’m not that petty. Instead, I’m going to do a 360 here and talk about movies for a change. Specifically, Western movies. Yesterday was the 128th anniversary of the Gunfight at the O.K. Corral, and since I excel at arbitrary reasons for writing posts, I’m gonna run with that. It may be a throwaway reason for a post, and one that would have been considerably less throwaway had I posted this on the day of the event in question, but what the hell. I’m here now, and we are ROCKIN’ THIS.

So, without further ado, here is a list of the Seven Best Westerns Of All Time as chosen by me, the Lu Galasso. Why seven, you no doubt ask? Well, ten is to common, and five isn’t enough so…seven. Also, it was Mickey Mantle’s number, so I’m at least attempting to tie this into baseball.

I should also blatantly state that this is a list of personal preferences and not necessarily the be-all-end-all classics of the genre. I feel the need to add this disclaimer, because things are gonna get a bit wacky, and there’s going to be moderate dissention as to the nature of my choices. And on that note, I begin this list with the wackiest and sure to be most argued member of this list – a movie so far removed from traditional “classic” status, that many would no doubt question it’s merits as a “competent” film, let alone a defining entry in the Western genre.

Seven: Young Guns. (1988)

That’s right. This is happening. “Young Guns” made the cut.

I swear to god it gets better from here.

Here’s the deal about “Young Guns.” It takes the legendary life of Billy the Kidd, removes 95% of the historical facts and accuracy that have been collected over the years, and then casts the Brat Pack as his merry band of ne’er-do-wells.

Awesome.

This may well be the last time, or perhaps the first time, Emilio Estevez, Lou Diamond Phillips, Casey Siemaszko, and to a lesser extent, Charlie Sheen, have ever been this badassingly awesome. Throw in Jack Palance as a deliciously over-the-top Irish land baron (for some damn reason), and you got the makings of a Western staple.

Or, at least, you got the makings of an almost textbook example of how NOT to make a Western.

And Kiefer Sutherland always has and always will be awesome, so it’s got that going for it too.

Six: Silverado. (1985)

What better way to follow the ridiculous over-the-top Brat Packery of “Young Guns”, than with the ridiculously, over-the-top Kevin Klinery of “Silverado.”

So here’s the setup: take Kevin Kline, Scott Glenn, Danny Glover, and a shockingly young and enthusiastic Kevin Costner, pit them against Brian Dennehy, Ray Baker, and a young and creepy Jeff Goldblum, throw in some needless and ineffectual sentimentality provided by Linda Hunt as a down-trodden saloon keeper and Joe Seneca as Danny Glover’s down-trodden farmer dad, and cap it off with some Sheriff John Cleese (?) and the always reliable Jeff Fahey, and you got yourself “Silverado.”

Sound bizarre? It is.

Kline and Dennehy are great as ex-friends who reunite in the movie’s titular town – one as a “good” outlaw, the other a corrupt town official. (See what they did there?)

But it’s Costner, surprisingly, who gives the movie its heart. His turn as up-and-coming gunslinger Jake, teeming with boundless energy and real joy and excitement at what he does, is fairly unique in his career, and a lot of fun to watch.

And, hey, it’s even got Jeff Goldblum as a suave, knife-throwing villain. What’s not to love?!?

Five: Tombstone. (1993)

“Tombstone” is a strange beast. On the one hand, it’s one of my all time favorite films. On the other hand, it remains one of the most frustratingly flawed movies I have ever seen, Western or otherwise. Still, on the strength of its stellar cast, it’s stunningly accurate depiction of the famous Gunfight at the O.K. Corral, as well as Wyatt Earp’s vendetta ride against the sinister Cowboys, and it’s sheer enthusiasm, I think it remains a strong entry in the Western genre.

Yeah, it’s flawed. The romantic subplot is cheesy and tacked on, and there are way too many wannabe-epic-moments that come off as ridiculously over-the-top and forced. (Earp’s slow motion assault on Cowboy Curly Bill Broscius whilst shouting “no!” repeatedly screams to mind.)

The cast IS excellent, though. Kurt Russell remains my favorite portrayer of Wyatt Earp, ever. He’s stoically awesome throughout the picture, and let’s face it – Kurt Russell is like the face of awesome.

Sam Elliot and Bill Paxton are great as Wyatt’s brothers, Virgil and Morgan, and Michael Biehn is wonderfully disturbing as the psychotic gunslinger Johnny Ringo.

But it is of course Val Kilmer, in his career defining role as the alcoholic ex-dentist Doc Holliday that steals the show. Kilmer’s performance ranks as, bar-none, the BEST portrayal of Wyatt Earp’s best friend ever put to screen. The fact that a character as bizarre as Holliday existed to begin with (alcoholic-doctor-cum-gunslinger, steadfast in the face of danger because – the hell with it – he’s dying anyway) is awesome in its own right. But Kilmer manages to inject him with just the right amount of happy-go-lucky charm, cynicism, and yes, even sadness, to make him come alive on-screen like never before. And his unwavering loyalty to Wyatt is epic in its own right as well; when asked by a fellow vendetta rider why he’s fighting alongside Earp when he should be at home resting (or dying), Doc replies curtly that “Wyatt Earp is my friend”, and the scene suddenly becomes poignant when the fellow asking the question, along with the audience, realizes that that’s the only friend he’s got.

Flawed? Sure. But it has enough going for it to make it a perennial favorite of mine…and to give it a spot on this list.

Four: Unforgiven. (1992)

Heading into darker territory, now. Circle the wagons!

“Unforgiven” is a dark, disturbed film, where the good guys and the bad guys have all seemed to come to an agreement to cast off the traditional white and black hats that usually define the heroes and villains in these sagas, and instead opt for hats shaded in gray.It’s a Clint Eastwood masterpiece, and turns the Western genre upside down.

Eastwood’s morally ambiguous protagonist William Munny, a former alcoholic gunslinger searching for redemption, centers a tale that atmospherically and thematically, has more in common with the noir genre then the Western one. Steeped in violence, the film showcases the cruel side of the old West like never before – personified by Gene Hackman’s corrupt lawman, Little Bill Daggett, a murderous bully who becomes Munny’s nemesis by film’s end.

It’s a defining and defiant film, that had many critics praising it as the “eulogy for the Western.” Grim, violent, and devoid of the usual morality found in films of this ilk, it remains a classic in the genre, and a haunting, disturbing film that will remain with you for quite some time – you may never look at cowboys the same way again.

Well.

“Unforgiven” kind of messed up my “fun Western” thing I was going for. Ah, well.

Anywho, I’m fast approaching 1500 words here, so I think I’ll cut it short. Tune in tomorrow for the final three.

I promise they’ll be slightly better films than these.

Though I doubt ANYTHING is better than “Silverado.”

]]>