In LA I learned…

…..that the grass actually is greener on the other side. (obviously a metaphor because I don’t think I saw a single blade of grass while I was there)

…..that when talking with a sweet enthusiastic little goth fellow (Kynt) for an hour about Mac cosmetics, comic book movies and Hello Kitty fashion accessories, never assume he hasn’t been travelling the planet with his hot goth girlfriend (Vyxsin) as a semi-famous finalist on the Amazing Race. Wikipedia has just informed me that the “ubiquitous dating goths” have since been eliminated but had a great run.

…..that enthusiastic little goth fellows who look 12 will say they are 22 and from LA but are actually 31 and from Louisville, Kentucky. ***

…..never underestimate a cupcake

…..that as much as I love modern indie dance music, all you really need to keep a party going is a room full of people who don’t suck, a tall bald pastor doing some sort of interpretive gorilla dance and a chick spinning James Brown and Aretha records. (and arguably a dude pouring half price beer)

…..that when you say “no onions please” it actually seems to mean “not only do I want onions but I demand them in excess.” Good to know.

…..that not every person there is a famous actor; some of them are also in gangs. However, bff Kansas corn farmer Dave and I think we saw Jay-Z like 12 times and Vern Troyer standing on a speaker taking pictures.

** Just so he doesn’t whine, I will clarify that bff Dave isn’t a corn farmer, he is the guitarist for Far Beyond Frail and “D” list celebrity in the renown Kansas City, Missouri hipster scene.

*** I should also clarify that I don’t walk around in LA or anywhere else looking for 31yo goth boys who look 12. I was waiting with my WIFE and Nikki in an embarrassingly long line of small girls, soccer moms and middle aged goth boys who were buying limited edition Twilight DVD’s…(I’m not proud of that either)

To be continued…

Friday night was a night of amazing luck.  Not only did my flight get in 52 minutes early, but Moon BOOKED IT over to Hollywood after work (without eating any dinner- that’s commitment) got us tickets for your appearance at Hot Topic, picked me & the hubster up at LAX, and drove us BACK to Hollywood where we showed up at 10:04 and live twitted our entire evening’s experience. And though the night ended around 2am, I still had enough energy to drag my bag up Moon’s bajillion stairs into her house, even though it was 5am my time. Luck, I tell you…

Because we had tickets, we decided NOT to wait in the long-ass line of ticket holders since it was freezing and FAR away from the action. Instead we got up close and personal with all your fans and the camera crews waiting outside of the Hot Topic Store.  There we met some pretty great new Twi-friends (and made fun of and took pictures of some way weirdo Twi-fans) and got to be with Mini-Edward for his first MTV experience.  It was so fun being with all the hyped-up fans (minus the one girl who seriously needs to be kicked for her insane screaming fits) that we didn’t even mind waiting for you for two hours. Plus when you finally showed you were in this adorable red dress flashing your famous, gorgeous “Ashley Greene” smile that we didn’t even mind the crowd rushing us from behind and pushing us into the security gate. (Okay…we minded a little…)

After you went into Hot Topic we decided to be super smart and, again, forego the long-ass line and get us a midnight snack. Johnny Rockets rocks the fries at 12:15am.  By the time we were done, we jumped back at the end of the line, made it into Hot Topic within a 1/2 hour, snapped some adorable shots of you behind the counter, picked up our signed copies of the DVD & swooned over your adorable Twilight earrings (and after viewing some of the professional vids of you that night- we realize you didn’t show up with those earrings and must’ve put them on mid-evening… we’re guessing you were wearing a fan gift, which makes you even more bff-worthy in our minds).

Plus, we ended the night meeting the BEST Unicorn ever in line- Kynt from season 12 of The Amazing Race. He’s the biggest Twilight fan and we wanna invite him to our next sleepover with you and Rachelle, if that’s okay with you.

Really, not much could’ve made our night better (well, maybe 5-8 degrees, a soft comfy chair, 1 less screaming, crazy girl, & you coming 2 hours earlier serving us Rob on a platter). It was amazing and so wonderful to know without a doubt that you are the graceful, beautiful person you appear to be on screen, up close & personal!

Bffs already,
UnintendedChoice

Seriously, amazing night. I was high on adreneline and that’s the only reason I wasn’t falling asleep standing up. Thanks to Ashley Greene for being your adorable, awesome self. Thanks to Moon for not eating dinner and running all over town to ensure we had an amazing night- plus putting the Edward Cullen PillowCase on the bed to welcome me to your home. Thanks to JBell who is our best cheerleader on Twitter! Thanks to the hubster for sitting by himself for hours in downtown Hollywood and enduring the people pretending to be Jesus & Spiderman in the street. And thanks to Kynt, our new friend, who blogs here, and who was so fun to meet at 1-something in the am. Oh, and thanks to Rob Pattinson because you’re hot and… why the hell not?

    Perhaps most, like myself, saw Kynt and Vyxsin in the previews for this season’s Amazing Race, laughed aloud, and swore they would be the first out and most hated. They taught us never to judge a book by its cover, especially when compared to the All-American beauty (but inner nastiness) that is Nate and Jen. I’d have to say that those crazy, hot pink tinged kids did an incredible job on this leg considering all that they were up against. Their prowess at yoga wasn’t terribly surprising, and there was almost a sweetness in Kynt’s belief that the yoga masters were hot for Vyxsin. (By the way, did anyone else catch the oh so lecherous leer that Phil gave Rachel at the mat? Easy there, stud. Get back to your advertisements.)  In the end, it was the poor decision to U-Turn Nicholas and Don that got them. If only, if only…

    In other, less stunning news, Ron is still a jerk. I love that he “felt demoralized” because Christina tried to correct him. You’d think that he’d learn that he does that to his child everyday. He’s chauvinism personified. Every time I see one of his “Who’s Your Daddy?” shirts, I can’t help but to think, “Thankfully, not you.” One day, just maybe, she’ll haul off and punch him. At least he hasn’t called her fat again…yet.  While Christina is infinitely lovable, her father makes me beg weekly for their elimination. Of course, that hope is mostly based off of the desire for her to get far, far away from that man.

    So, we’re left with only one completely palatable team: the beloved TK and Rachel. Here’s hoping they can hold it down for the good guys.