WWE SmackDown 25/12/09 7/9 (HQ) michelle mccool hosts – mickie james- layla, maria – beth phoenix

The divas duke it out while Michelle Mccool watches from ring side. She has just insulted Mickie James in the change room about her weight and her and layla gave a Jenny Craig gift membership to Mickie, telling her to lose weight.

It was cool watching DX Generation fight with The Hart Dynasty.

tyson Kid, David r smith, the hart dynasty, natalia, entrance , DX entrance Triple H, Sean Michaels

DX Generation Triple H, Sean Michaels, The Hart Dynasty.

When I first moved to Massachusetts most of my new friends were discovered with the help of my little black lab mix, Kaine.  One of Kaine’s best friends was Ella, another black lab mix.  Her owners parents were named Nikki and Aaron, and they taught me a killer version of one of my favorite pasta dishes from The Outback – Wallhalla Pasta.  I’ve been making my adaptation ever since, and always to rave reviews.

Wallhalla Pasta
          adapted from Nikki & Aaron Kovan 

Ingredients
1 stick butter
1 zucchini, sliced into discs
1 summer squash, sliced into discs
1/2 sweet onion, chopped
1 chopped, seeded tomato
1 cup sugar or snap peas
2 chicken boobs
1/2 cup heavy cream
2 to 3 tablespoons minced garlic
1/2 cup parmesan
salt & pepper, to taste

Directions
Par-cook the chicken. 
Use 1/3 of the stick of butter, saute onions, add chicken & cook 2 minutes.
Add garlic, cook 2 minutes.
Make a well in the ingredients; Add another 1/3 of the stick of butter.
Cook both squashes for 2 minutes, then stir all pan ingredients together.
Add tomatoes and peas.
Add last of the butter, cook 5 minutes.
Add cream and parmesan.  Stir until parmesan melts.
Toss with cooked pasta.
Add salt and pepper to taste.

[Photos to Come]

Well, this year we’re spending Christmas in Canada.  That’s right, we’re in Canada for Christmas.  I’m without my kitchen – my knives, my pots, my beloved Kitchen Aid.  I’m sad.  I miss my shit – alot.  So, we’ll make due and perform in their absence, because, well, a girl’s still got to eat.

French Toast Breakfast Casserole with Apple Cider Syrup
          recipe adapted from a bed & breakfast creation (we couldn’t live without)

Ingredients
1 loaf french bread (make it good, not that dried up, cornmeal coated grocery store junk)
1 package cream cheese, cubed
8 eggs
2 cups milk
6 tablespoons butter, melted
1/4 cup maple syrup

Directions
Cube the french bread.  Grease a 9×13 inch baking pan. 
Arrange half of the bread cubes in the prepared pan. 
Dot the cubes with the cream cheese cubes, then top with remaining bread cubes.
Combine eggs, milk, butter, and syrup.  Pour evenly over bread in pan.
Press the layers to moisten through.  Cover and refrigerate 2 hours or more (overnight).
Bake at 350 degrees F for 45 minutes or until center is set and edges are golden brown.
Let stand for 10 minutes.  Slice and serve with Apple Cider Syrup.

[Photos Coming]

Apple Cider Syrup

Ingredients
1/2 cup sugar
4 teaspoons cornstarch
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1 cup apple juice
1 tablespoon lemon juice
2 tablespoons butter

Directions
Combine first sugar, cornstarch, and cinnamon in small saucepan, then stir in juices.
Cook and stir over medium heat until thickened and bubbly.
Cook for 2 minutes.
Remove from heat and stir in butter.
Serve over French Toast Breakfast Casserole.

The last Layla-centric post for (hopefully) some time.

As a group social science, she and some other girls built a house of sort, which, when combined with the rest of the class, formed a village of sorts. I’m not really sure what the point was since I didn’t see any order to the village, and it all seemed residential in nature. But whatever.

Party Place House indeed

The house in question

Complete with bubbles and Tiger Woods magazine

Layla sure is getting lots of pub around here lately.

This time another musical event at school. The first nine weeks she was trying out band and the clarinet (just like Madysen did years ago). This nine weeks was the orchestra and the violin (also, like Madysen did, though maybe it was a viola–I’m old).

Given the pain inflicted on our ears last time, I decided the static medium of photography was a better choice.

I think they need to work more on how to take care of the instruments

… I will look like this, as I stagger around a Moroccan citadel:

[Shukran Karim2k; image by Brian Auer @Flickr.]

Has been attacked in at least tree separate occasions by an alleged four-legged furry creature. There is no solid proof, but here is the evidence:

Last time I saw Layla dance, there was a tree lighting and fireworks. This time was nearly so celebratory, but it was at NorthPark Center on the Saturday before Christmas. Which means it was a crazy scene.

They danced the 2 same numbers as last time, and Emma and I were in poor viewing spots (looking down from the second floor and from behind), so I just snapped a couple of photos. We did share a cuatro leches cupcake from La Duni afterwards that was might tasty.

Speaking of a crazy scene, Emma and I had words with a man (clearly not a gentleman) in the parking lot who swooped into the parking spot we were waiting on. If only I had a Cousin Eddie to get me a gift related to teaching him a lesson.

Here’s a little video of our training session earlier this week. Sorry about the poor video quality… at least I had the camera pointing in the right direction this time!

Layla and I had some clicker fun with a slippery box. Layla tends to get too aroused when I attempt to do any sort of shaping, but this session actually wasn’t too bad. Her eyes are big and she’s still a bit frantic in her movement, but she was taking treats much more softly than normal. She also calmed down towards the end of the session, which was a pleasant change: usually the longer we go, the more she ramps up. She’s still too high, but it’s getting better! I’ve been doing a lot of these little games lately with her… short little training sessions doing nothing in particular. Usually I try to work more on a concept (hind end awareness, targeting, offering behaviors without getting too high) rather than concentrating on a specific behavior. In this case, I planned to completely  shape the end behavior (backing onto the box with her back legs up and her front legs on the ground), but decided to help her with a known cue once in the middle of the session (“touch,” which is the agility cue for the two-on/two-off contact behavior). I think helping her by cueing her to touch once kept her from getting too frustrated and lowered her arousal level.

As a schoolgirl, my idea of rebellion was wearing a white shirt when the school handbook CLEARLY STATED IT SHOULD BE LIGHT BLUE.

It might not sound like much, but where does torching the physics teacher’s pet cat with a Bunsen burner get you? Or spraying ‘Fr Mulroney is a cock’ on the gym wall? I’ll tell you: expelled, and double detention with a wire brush and bucket of soapy water respectively. Whereas I was subversively picking away at the very fabric of authority via my choice of fabric colour. You’ve got to admire the symmetrical anarchy of it.

It gets better. When apprehended by a teacher, I would apologise profusely, except that – get this – I WASN’T REALLY SORRY AT ALL. Oh, how I used to laugh behind the bicycle shed later, unbuttoning that same shirt while the boys lined up to see my jugs in exchange for five quid or a king-sized Mars bar.

Most of that preceding paragraph is pure fabrication (still with the textile analogies). I never worked up the enthusiasm or morals to be much success as a slut.

But I did laugh, a LOT.

Many years later, I realised that wearing a white shirt was not the sartorial spit in the eye of The System it could have been because, while my defiant shirt may have been white in a previous life, it was more often than not an off-white blue. Although there were days my white shirt was shot through with brilliant vermillion streaks like the rising dawn – or more pedestrianly yet accurately, streaky bacon – which was quite the statement.

The statement being that my mother had washed my shirt with a red sock.

For many years – in the region of 25 – I thought a side effect of the washing process was that it turned white clothes grey. Sometimes it took only one wash; sometimes more. Occasionally white garments emerged from the wash still pristine but for a violent pink spackle over one nipple; or a joyous blue Catherine wheel effect radiating from the armpit.

For mum, laundry is an outlet for all the pent up creativity she never had the time to burn off with a spot of watercolouring, or extreme macramé away. I’ve never caught her at it, but I imagine her with a basket of dirty clothes before her front-loader, rubbing her hands, going, “So, three white t-shirts and some cotton knickers . . . in we go . . . lalala . . . what if I casually toss in this green scarf with . . . a blue singlet? – no – let me see – mmm lala lalaa . . . oh! – what have we here? ah, my maroon harem trousers . . . oh yes, I think that would be lovely and festive . . . LalaLAA. I wonder whether the expression ‘evil genius’ has been coined yet? Mwa ha haa. Mwa ha ha ha haaaargh.”

But the pinnacle of her achievements, the jewel in her crown, the Kleenex in the pocket of mum’s laundry career, was my first boyfriend’s Eric Clapton t-shirt.

In the fragile, tender days constituting the birth of our young love, JP brought me to see Eric Clapton play in the RDS in Dublin. It was the best date I’d EVER been on – possibly because it was the ONLY date I’d ever been on, unless you count Gary Hayes trying to excavate my tonsils with his tongue in the back row of The Grand, which I don’t.

JP and I snogged like we had gills for the entire duration of ‘Layla’. God, the romance of it all *sigh!* Afterwards, JP bought himself a limited edition Eric Clapton t-shirt from an Official Merchandising Material vendor. It featured a handsome globe overlaid with a giant guitar: a masterpiece of screen printing.

Evidently, mum still feels guilty about it – as well she should – because even now, fifteen years later, I’ll say, “Hey mum, can you-”, and she’ll splutter, “Look, why the feck was I feckin washing your boyfriend’s feckin Eric Clapton t-shirt in the first place?” and stick her chin out aggressively.

It was because JP sometimes lent me his prized Eric Clapton t-shirt to demonstrate his True, Deep, Abiding Love Which Would Never Die, and at the time I was living at home where mum was the only one who knew how to program the washing machine.

Not only did she dye JP’s Eric Clapton t-shirt grey (alternatively she might have been wiping down the fireplace with it), in a brilliantly devious manoeuvre she managed to shrink it as well.

Our True, Deep, Abiding Love Which Would Never Die did not survive my mother’s washing – or, for that matter, the juxtaposition of JP’s personality with mine.

Mine more than his, admittedly.

At least when we broke up and I compiled a cardboard box of JP’s possessions including the ruined Eric Clapton t-shirt, it was an appropriate metaphor for the demise of our relationship.

I was reminded of all this the other day, when mum put on a load of dad’s and her clothes. It takes a rare degree of skill to mangle clothes in our washing machine, since there is no hot water supply to the tub. Yet somehow, freakily, mum managed to streak dad’s favourite white t-shirt blue.

Bear in mind that, for over 40 years, mum has washed dad’s clothes. So you would expect that, picking his t-shirt out of the wash, a range of emotions might cross his face: futility, bewilderment, dismay, weary resignation, a half-hearted attempt at fury.

You would be wrong.

Bless him, dad actually looked genuinely SURPRISED.

This may be symptomatic of extreme delusion, but I like to think it’s reflective of dad’s abundant hope, optimism, belief in the inherent good of his fellow man, and his love for his wife.

Call me a sucker.

11:02 P.M.

Sunday, Home.

I have this insane urge to just rip everything from its seams and drop it. I want to go somewhere, anywhere, with absolutely nothing and just get lost. I love the feeling of not knowing where I am and seeing things I’m unfamiliar with. I want to do this now, but everything here is so recognizable. I don’t know how much longer I can live in this town. Its times like these that I think it drives me crazy. Maybe I should just run away, without a word or a note, and come back whenever I feel the need. I should probably do this, but I don’t have the balls or the will. Plus, I can’t hurt my family like that, and so I wait. Wait for the time that will grant me the pleasure of an adventure. Let’s see what God has in store for me…

11:16 P.M.
Hey diary, you know what’s sad? I forgot today was Sunday. I’ve wanted to try and go to church but I never have the motivation whenever that time comes. I feel guilty for this, because I’m supposed to be this God loving kid. I was at one time, I think… A friend and I used to go to church all the time, and whenever she dropped her faith I kept going. I tried to go on Wednesdays, I loved to go, but then what happened? I haven’t gone since like May! I need inspiration when it comes to God, because I like to question everything. I need a preacher to pound his love into my head, because otherwise I’ll completely numb myself to it. I think that’s what I’ve done. I’m numb of His love, and so now I literally have to force myself to read the Bible. I’ve found myself making little excuses not to read it, but then when I don’t I lose it. I get so down and I feel a great void inside me. Right now I think this void is filled with shame. I’ve fallen from God’s grace and I’ve been rubbing my face in the dirt for months. I’ve had the chances to get back up… But you know what’s sick? I’ve purposely kept myself down. I’m sick in the head diary… I really am, because I like to feel numb. I want to feel loved and know of God, but at the same time I just want to sulk and escape the world in my own little hole.

Ahh, and this is where it gets really disgusting.

Let me point out that without God I wouldn’t be the same. My morals (by now) would have been already shot and hidden beneath the sand by now (or thrown in a rushing river…). I learned this whenever I started reading The Heroin Diaries by Nikki Sixx. This book is supposed to make others feel ill and see the horrible things behind the addiction of drugs. It’s supposed to show the truth, and by doing that push others away from it. But you know what? It just makes me want to search for a dealer and shoot up myself. It makes me want to get addicted, push and disgust everyone around me, and just be alone with a needle hanging out of my skin. It makes me want to face death, and so either die or live past an overdose or two. I know this is stupidity marking its territory, and since I’m at least trying to be with God I would never do this. But it’s this adventure-craving trait inside of me that wants this, for sometimes I just want to go out and sin it up. I want to be sad; I want to be extremely depressed, because truthfully I love it. I don’t know if I’d rather be miserable or happy sometimes… I know that’s not normal. So I must assume that I’m not right in the head. After all, what kind of person wants to suffer? Especially by such a terrible thing as addiction.

December 21, 2009
2:19 A.M.

Monday, home.

Now that I read this I feel guilty. I have this ignorance in me and I melt it into the wrinkles of my brain. I should continue what I said, just to explain myself but I’m not. There are other things on my mind now. For instance, the pain and sufferings of others. What I wrote last night brought a pretty big break-through, and honestly I’m so glad. I don’t know what to think of it just yet, but I might not feel so isolated or cold anymore.

My sister keeps talking to the dog. It’s pretty annoying… I can’t seem to keep a straight thought going with her talking to Layla about everything. I’ll write more later. Maybe even in a few hours, seeing as how sleep is becoming my enemy.

Later…

P.S.
Haha, this shouldn’t be funny but Layla just pooped some runny crap and Shanna has to pick it up. She kept complaining and whining, but I wouldn’t help her. Hey, I don’t do poop. I’ll play with the puppy, but once it poops it’s yours. ;P Maybe if you had been a little more quiet I would have gotten off my butt. Oh well. At least I got a smile from it. The only downside is the smell…

Tables Ladders & Chairs 2009, December 13, 2009, AT&T Center, San Antonio, TX

Announcers: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, & Matt Striker

Opening Match, ECW Championship Ladder Match: Christian vs. Shelton Benjamin

These two came right out and announced that they were going to steal the show here tonight and I can’t say that I would bet against them.  There’s ladders everywhere of course so we don’t have to screw around, but we actually do anyways with a bit of a feeling out period that ends with Christian hitting a dropkick.  Shelton leaps to the top off a whip and comes off with a press, then works Christian over.  Christian comes back with a Killswitch attempt which is countered to a backbreaker and now the crowd starts to buzz as Shelton goes for the first ladder.  Christian follows him and they go at it on the floor which ends with Christian being sent to the barrier.  Shelton goes for the ladder again, but this time Christian dives on him to break it up.  He then gets a ladder in the ring and climbs, but Shelton makes it back to save.  He monkey flips Shelton out of the corner, with Shelton landing on his feet and going for the quick win, but Christian pulls him down and tosses him.  He grabs the ladder and looks to throw it at Shelton, but Shelton trips him up and the ladder lands on Christian’s face, busting him open.  The match actually grinds to a halt so that the medics can patch Christian up to preserve the PG rating.  Matt Striker claims that this is mandated by the Texas State Athletic Commission, but then Lawler actually ruins that perfectly plausible cover up by saying that it’s actually a WWE rule.  We finally get going again with some trading on the floor which leads to them climbing a ladder on the floor, Christian falling, and Shelton hitting a flip dive off the ladder.  Shelton then makes a ladder bridge between the apron and the announce table so he can catapult Christian into it, but Christian kicks him off.  In the ring, Christian gets a ladder in the corner, but his whip is reversed and he hits it.  This sets up a Stinger Splash, but Christian throws a ladder at him to block.  He climbs, but Shelton saves and nails a spinkick.  He then runs Christian to a ladder and climbs.  Christian recovers and joins him so he can take Shelton down with an inverted DDT.  Next we get a real cool spot where they’re fighting on the ladder again and it tips over, but Shelton lands on his feet on the top rope.  Not the corner mind you, but the rope.  That’s an amazing display of balance.  He then rides the ladder down into a clothesline on Christian.  Another dual climb sees Shelton take him down with a powerslam after climbing over him.  Christian gets a ladder in the corner again, but this time falls victim to the Stinger Splash.  Shelton climbs, but Christian pulls the ladder out so he’s left dangling. He can’t knock Shelton down though, so he resets the ladder and goes up to knock him down from there.  Christian just about has it, but this time Shelton removes the ladder and drags him down.  Soon they’re both climbing again and Shelton sets up the sunset flip spot, but Christian counters it to a headscissors to the buckle.  They fight on the apron with Shelton teasing the German suplex to the floor, but Christian holds on.  He knocks Shelton back onto the ladder bridge from earlier, and then splashes him off the top, breaking the ladder in half in the process.  That’s it for Shelton, so Christian climbs, grabs the belt, and retains at 18:06.  Not blowaway awesome as there have certainly been better ladder matches, but it was still really good.  I hope Christian stays in ECW forever as he gets to shine here but would be lost in the shuffle anywhere else.  As for Shelton, he deserves better then to just be a guy they drag out when it’s time for a spotfest, but that’s a broken record by this point.  ***3/4

Intercontinental Championship Match: John Morrison vs. Drew McIntyre

They start out with some mat wrestling, and they Morrison kicks it up with a spin kick.  Corner whip is reversed, but Morrison gets to the apron and shoulders McIntyre from there.  Headscissor takedown and a running kick get a 2 count.  McIntyre bails and Morrison makes the mistake of following and ends up getting sent to the post.  Back in, that gets 2 and now McIntyre goes to work.  Short clothesline gets 2 and he goes to an armbar.  Morrison fires out, but gets quickly cut off.  Suplex gets 2 for McIntyre, and then he cuts off another comeback by hitting a big boot for a couple of 2 counts.  To an armbar, and this time Morrison fires out and has success by countering a backbreaker to a DDT for 2.  He follows with a clothesline, high knee and kick for 2.  Top rope dropkick gets another 2, but then he runs into a knee.  An inverted flapjack gets 2, but Morrison revives and dropkicks McIntyre to the floor.  He follows again and looks to have been taken advantage of again, but ends up taking McIntyre to the barrier with a drop toehold.  He then springs off the apron and nails a kick.  Back in the ring, McIntyre misses a charge and hits the post.  Starship Pain connects, and Morrison covers, but the ref rules that McIntyre’s foot is under the ropes and waves the count off at 2.  A frustrated Morrison stomps away, but then has an issue with his belt where it seems to break.  The ref makes him take it off and as the ref is getting rid of it, McIntyre gets a shot to the eyes.  He follows with the double arm DDT, now dubbed the Scot Drop and that gets the 3 count.  Drew McIntyre is the new IC Champ at 10:20.  A decent outing here, but kind of a sad way to do a Title switch.  One of the bigger problems with having too many Titles comes up here.  We’re supposed to buy this as a big moment, but really this is probably the sixth (out of seven) most important match on the show, and of the three Title changes, this is by far least important, so it just gets buried and forgotten under the upper card stuff.  **

We also get a post match segment where Vince McMahon congratulates McIntyre on his win, and then Josh Matthews interviews him.  Not much of note is said, but Sheamus then interrupts and promises that McIntyre isn’t the only newcomer leaving with gold tonight.

Women’s Championship Match: Michelle McCool (w/Layla) vs. Mickie James

Layla still has the “Piggie James” shirt on as they feel the need to bury the most consistently popular woman they have for who knows what reason.  Michelle bails right away, and then when Mickie finally gets here they do this intense lockup spot where they hold it even while rolling out of the ring in order to sell the hatred here.  Michelle charges, but gets rolled up for 1, and tripped up for another 1.  Second rollup gets 2before Michelle finally nails her.  Mickie goes for a crucifix, but Michelle back her to the corner to break it and then drops a knee for 1.  Michelle goes to work on the back for a bit until Mickie makes a comeback, but ends up running into a backbreaker for 2.  Mickie then gets a cradle for a 2 of her own, but ends up getting tossed and sent to the barrier.  Michelle misses a running knee, and then Mickie connects with a headscissors followed by a Thesz press off the apron.  Back in, Layla tries a distraction, but Mickie no sells it and hits another Thesz press and then a dropkick for 2.  Two clotheslines and a forearm follow.  She knocks Michelle down and goes up, but Layla shoves her off.  Mickie nails her and then causes Michelle to run into her and knock her to the floor.  Mickie gets a quick rollup for a close 2, but then gets up right into a kick from Michelle and that gets the 3 count to retain at 7:32.  Michelle is okay by Divas standards, but not head and shoulders above the rest as her push would suggest, and I don’t really get the appeal of her.  And I mentioned it at the beginning, but still, poor Mickie.  *1/2

WWE Championship Tables Match: John Cena vs. Sheamus

Well, in the time since Survivor Series, Sheamus has been built up relatively well.  I wasn’t sold on him as a challenger originally, but it is good that it’s not one of the usual suspects and there are certainly worse choices.  Cena attacks, ramming Sheamus to the buckle and nailing the bulldog.  Corner whip sees Sheamus get the elbow up and nail a clothesline.  He then hits a suplex and drops a knee.  He goes for a table, which by the way are all under the ring with none pre set, but Cena stops him and rams him to the announce table three times.  To the barrier is next, but Sheamus turns the tide and sends him to the post.  Whip to the steps is reversed however and Sheamus hits.  Cena successfully gets a table setup and puts Sheamus on it, but Sheamus rolls off before Cena can put him through.  Sheamus then attacks, dropping some knees to the back and hitting a powerslam.  He gets Cena on the apron in front of the table on the floor and almost gets Cena down, but Cena hangs on.  Cena sets up the Attitude Adjustment, but Sheamus escapes and rams him to the buckle.  They fight outside near the table again with both guys teasing a big move through it, but not being able to get it.  They fight up the ramp and Cena suplexes him on the steel.  He then grabs the table and picks it up to take an overhead swing with it, but Sheamus moves.  That was kind of goofy as the table is so big and awkward that it can only be swung like that in slow motion.  They brawl back to ringside through the crowd and Cena clotheslines him back over the barrier.  Cena sets another table on the floor, but gets back in the ring and walks into the Irish Curse Kick.  Now Sheamus sets the table in the corner of the ring and sets Cena up like he did Mark Cuban last week, but Cena comes out with a sunset flip, which saves himself, but there’s obviously no pinfalls here.  He goes for the STF, but Sheamus escapes.  Cena does get the double shoulderblocks and the Protobomb, followed by the Five Knuckle Shuffle.  Sheamus is dazed, but has the presence of mind to realize that a table in the corner benefits Cena now much more then it benefits himself, so he dumps it to the outside which is a cool moment.  Cena indeed follows up with the AA, but with no table there he can’t win it.  So now he has to stop and get a table and set it up, which he does.  He sets up for another AA from the top through the table, but can’t hold him up.  They trade blows and Cena appears to try for a superplex instead, but gets shoved off and goes through the table to end it at 16:24.  Sheamus is the new WWE Champion, which is something I really didn’t believe they would pull the trigger on so the genuinely surprised me.  The match was alright as most of it was brawling which both of these guys are better at anyways than wrestling.  Another cool touch was that they found some kids in the crowd decked out in their John Cena merchandise, who were practically crying at the result.  It’s still real to them damnit.  **1/2

World Heavyweight Championship Chairs Match: The Undertaker vs. Dave Batista

Having left Rey behind, Batista has his sights squarely locked on the World Heavyweight Championship and gets his shot here having beaten Kane in a number one contenders match.  He goes for a chair right away, but Taker stops him.  They then fight over one on a floor for a bit before getting back in.  Taker hits a clothesline and stomps away.  Corner whip leads to Batista getting the elbow up and hitting a clothesline for 1.  Taker pulls him to the floor and sends him to the steps.  He gets a chair, but Batista kicks it away and runs Taker to the apron.  Whip is reversed and puts Batista over and into the timekeepers’ pit.  Taker stops to toss some chairs in the ring before going back at Batista, but misses the boot and hits the barrier.  Batista gets in our first chairshot and then chokes Taker with it.  Another chair misses and he hits the post with it which sets up Taker booting him on the apron and dropping the leg for 2.  He sets up Old School, but gets crotched and then Batista gets a superplex for 2.  Now he wants a Batista Bomb on a chair, but Taker backdrops out of it.  They trade shots and then Taker gets sent off the ropes into a spinebuster for 2.  Batista wedges a chair in the corner, but nothing comes of it yet.  Taker comes back with a flying clothesline and goes for Old School again, but hits it this time.  He follows with Snake Eyes, but Batista explodes out of the corner with a spear for 2.  He then hits a spinebuster on a chair, but out of nowhere Taker hooks him with Hell’s Gates.  The announcers point out that it’s not fully applied and sure enough Batista makes the ropes.  Batista goes to the floor and nails Taker with a chair from there.  In the ring he misses a charge and hits the chair in the corner from earlier.  Taker gets a clothesline from that for 2.  Chokeslam hits and gets another 2.  He sets up for the Tombstone, but Batista escapes, shoves Taker into the referee to put him out of position and then nails a low blow.  Chairshot follows and gets the pin to give Batista the World Heavyweight Championship at 14:44.  But wait!  Teddy Long comes out and says he can’t let the Title change hands like this so he restarts the match.  The odd part here is that he never actually mentions that he’s starting it up again because of the low blow, so if you were there live and didn’t catch that it may have been confusing.  Also, isn’t the Hell’s Gates still illegal?  Why didn’t anyone say anything about that?  I guess it didn’t lead to the finish, but still.  So Batista gets back in the ring where Taker boots a chair in his face.  He then nails Batista with it and hits the Tombstone for the pin at 15:13 to retain the Title after all.  Unfortunately the nature of the finish they booked meant that they couldn’t do anything else that was illegal in the match to make it interesting and being handcuffed like that did not help things.  *1/2

Kofi Kingston is warming up when Legacy comes in and to try and intimidate him, but instead Kofi just blows them off and goes straight to Orton himself to tell him what he thinks of the situation.

Randy Orton vs. Kofi Kingston

Up to and including Survivor Series, they did a really good job building this up, but since then they’ve managed to generate less interest in this match by the week.  They go with some mat wrestling to open things up and right off the bat this match has no heat.  Granted they are also in a bad position on the card, but the botched buildup is probably a bigger factor.  Orton works him over in the corner and then whips him across, but Kofi gets the boot up.  He charges out into a powerslam that gets Orton 2 and then Orton goes to a rear chinlock.  Kofi escapes to a rollup for 2 and then hits a Russian legsweep, but Orton rolls out to avoid the Boom Drop.  Kofi follows and then springs up to the top for a dive, but Orton catches him with a dropkick coming down and Kofi lands on the steps.  He’s selling the ribs so Orton drops him on the barrier.  In the ring, he gets 2 and then continues the assault with stomps to the midsection for another 2.  He drops him on the ropes and then drops a knee for 2.  He takes too much time setting up though and Kofi comes back with the SOS out of nowhere for 2.  Clothesline to the floor sets up a suicide dive and then back in the ring he gets a crossbody off the top for 2.  He follows with chops and a clothesline.  His corner whip is reversed, but he leaps up and comes off with a clothesline for 2.  Orton catches him with the backbreaker, but again spends too much time setting up and eats a dropkick.  Boom Drop hits, as does Trouble in Paradise, but Orton grabs the ropes at 2.  He rolls to the floor so Kofi has to drag him back in, but then takes advantage and nails the hanging DDT.  Orton sets up for the punt, which Kofi blocks with his arm, but he sells it like it’s been broken.  Orton targets it with a single arm DDT.  Kofi comes back with a desperation try for TIP, but Orton ducks and then finishes with the RKO at the unlucky time of 13:13.  Cole tries to sell that even in defeat, Kofi proved he belongs at Orton’s level, but really we had Orton get out of the finisher and beat him clean, so that’s not a good sign for him.  Time will tell, but this experiment could be over.  They were also suggesting that this sets Orton up for a Title shot.  **1/2

Batista confronts Teddy Long about how he’d better make things right or the next time he swings a chair it will be at Long’s head.  Teddy looks terrified so it would seem Batista will get the next shot at Taker as well.

Main Event, Unified Tag Team Championship TLC Match: Chris Jericho & The Big Show vs. Triple H & Shawn Michaels

Wow, the Tag Team Titles get to main event a PPV again.  They start off with a shoving match that quickly breaks down to a brawl as Shawn/Jericho and Show/HHH pair off.  Show whips HHH to the barrier, but charges and ends up going over.  A table gets setup against the barrier at the other end, but they end up brawling away into the crowd for a bit while Shawn and Jericho go in the ring.  Jericho gets another table setup but can’t suplex Shawn through it.  Back in the ring they go at it with Shawn countering an attempt at the Walls and hitting an inverted atomic drop and a slam.  He goes up, but the elbow hits knees.  Jericho goes for a ladder, but sees HHH working over Show up near the set so he goes there to make the save with a chair.  HHH foils him though and sets up for a Pedigree, but Jericho backdrops out.  Shawn joins the party with a chair of his own leading to a duel with Jericho won by Shawn, but he ends up getting nailed by Show anyways.  Jericho and Show go back to the ring and get a ladder, but Shawn and HHH are quickly back there.  HHH works over Jericho and nails him with the ladder.  They then suplex it onto Jericho and also take out Show with it.  Cole notes at this point that Shawn and HHH can win the first Tag Team Titles in the history of DX, so adjust your WWE Approved History Textbooks accordingly by erasing any references to the New Age Outlaws.  Shawn climbs, but Show makes the save and then goes to work on HHH.  Jericho comes back as well and a double team ensues.  He baseball slides the ladder into Shawn and then bulldogs HHH on it.  They then set it in the corner and hang HHH upside down by the leg.  Shawn gets whipped into him and then Show splashes him before he finally gets free.  Jericho goes to whip him to it again, but it’s reversed and he goes over and out.  Show misses a charge and takes a facebuster, and then gets hit with the ladder.  HHH then tosses it at Jericho on the floor, but that lets Show recover.  He sets up HHH for a chokeslam, but HHH counters to a DDT.  Shawn drops the top rope elbow and sets up Sweet Chin Music, but Jericho returns and gets him with the Codebreaker.  HHH gets Jericho with a spinebuster, but then takes a spear from Show.  Since he’s the only one left, Show sets up a ladder and c l i m b s…  v e r y…  s l o w l y… until HHH returns with a chair and nails him.  This just makes Show angry though, so he punches the chair back in HHH’s face.  He climbs again, but both of DX are there now and they tip the ladder over on him.  HHH hits the Pedigree and Show goes to the floor.  Shawn climbs now, but Jericho tips him over and he falls to the floor where he’s caught by Show and they both go down.  Jericho climbs and keeps kicking HHH off, but HHH finally takes him down with a powerbomb.  That makes it HHH’s turn to climb, until Show chokeslams him off.  Show then breaks the ladder for some reason before going to work on HHH again.  Jericho gets another ladder and the champs sandwich DX inside it and beat it with a chair.  Show rips the ladder apart as well before they toss Shawn and HHH to the floor.  Show puts them both through the table setup on the barrier earlier on and he and Jericho seemingly have a shot at the belts.  Jericho is trying to climb the half ladder but obviously can’t balance it.  So he gets on Show’s shoulders and tries for the belts while struggling to balance, but back comes DX to catch them in this compromising position.  Shawn hits Show with SCM which sends Jericho outside and he was probably supposed to go through the table that was there but he didn’t quite clear the top rope completely and kind of just hit the edge of it.  A second SCM and a clothesline with the ladder put Show down for good and that leaves HHH to hold the ladder while Shawn climbs to retrieve the belts for the win at 22:32.  The reaction isn’t even that over the top considering this is Shawn’s hometown and all, but it’s still a good one.  I don’t know where you go with the Tag Titles from here as Shawn and HHH came right out and said that they don’t matter.  I presume a short run and a huge screwjob to get the belts off of them, but I don’t know who it’s going to be as Jericho and Show appear to be done as a team after this week’s Raw.  With the news of Bret Hart signing they could go the direction of DX/Hart Dynasty, but that would require Bret to be a heel and I’m not sure I see them going that direction.  As for the match itself, it was very different then the opener, with less crazy spots and more storytelling, which is good and I think that the two matches were pretty much on par but I liked Christian/Shelton a bit better so it gets the extra ¼* to edge this one out for match of the night.  ***1/2

Final Thoughts: Okay, so that’s TLC, our final PPV of not only the year, but the decade as well.  It was a pretty good show as nothing sucked, or was even really too far below average for that matter.  The ladder matches led the way, which is pretty much what I expected coming in, plus we had a legitimate cool surprise of Sheamus walking out as the new WWE champion.  It was also a very wrestling oriented show as everything else was minimized save for three quick backstage segments, all of which added to the show rather than just being something to waste time or amuse Vince.  The only real low point for me was the complete lack of logic in the finish to Undertaker/Batista, but that’s not really that big of a deal.  I’m going to go Thumbs Up for TLC, and it gets a recommendation as a good little WRESTLING show void of the crap that you usually find on the TV shows.

I tend to think of myself as firmly within the camp of Positive Reinforcement trainers. I teach new skills using positive reinforcement (rewarding the dog for the behavior I like). I deal with unwanted behavior by teaching an alternate skill, managing the dog’s environment so the unwanted behavior is no longer reinforcing, and using negative punishment (taking away something the dog likes when the dog does something I dislike, for example giving the dog a time-out or turning my back on her and ignoring her for a few seconds during a training session). I don’t believe it is necessary, or for that matter even helpful, to use techniques that cause pain, fear, or intimidation in the name of training.

That said, there are a very few times in Layla’s life when I have resorted to using Positive Punishment. Positive punishment is the technical term for what most people think of as just plain punishment: applying something the dog dislikes when the dog does something you dislike, in order to make the dog less likely to repeat the offensive behavior.

This isn’t something I do lightly, and I always do a lot of soul-searching before applying any aversives. Is this skill really necessary for my dog to know for her own health or safety (or the health/safety of others)? Am I taking advantage of any/all management techniques to prevent the offensive behavior? Have I trained an alternate skill to a high level of proficiency, so that the dog really knows what I’m expecting of her? Is the behavior self-reinforcing and unable to be Premacked? Will the aversive work within three applications or less? If the answer to all of the above is not a resounding “yes!” then I am not in any position to use an aversive.

I’m writing about this topic tonight because I’m at the point where I will be using positive punishment to eliminate an unwanted behavior. In this case, I want to get rid of Layla’s yearly indulgence in frozen ‘poopsicles,’ which I found her blissfully snacking on in the yard tonight.

Poop eating, or coprophagia to use the technical term, is a very contagious behavior. Layla learned to eat poop from a foster puppy, a little four-month-old Cattle Dog we had with us for about a month. The Cattle Dog learned to eat poop from Abe, a Pit Bull he lived with at the shelter during the day. Abe also taught every single other dog at the shelter this lovely habit. All it took was for a dog to see another dog snacking on their poop, and they would pick up the habit. This is one reason why Duke never goes outside at the same time as Layla. No poop eating for Duke!

In Layla’s case, she only eats frozen poop. She also only eats poop from kibble-fed dogs, probably because there are still all sorts of undigested goodies in it. There are no fillers or preservatives in a raw food diet, hence nothing interesting coming out the other end! The problem with this is that because of Layla’s horrible allergies, she has an allergic reaction to any poop she eats, just as she would to eating a piece of bread or a chicken breast. Her ears get infected, her skin gets itchy, red, and flaky, and she leaks urine for a couple days. If she’s eaten enough to really bother her, she may lose patches of fur and she will almost certainly become very crabby and short-tempered.

There are all sorts of remedies for coprophagia. Probably one of the easiest is to add something to the dog’s diet to make the stuff coming out the other end taste bad. One would think this wouldn’t be necessary (since one would think poop already tastes bad), but for many dogs this simple measure cures coprophagia. Bromelain is one popular remedy, and can be bought either as a health food supplement in capsules or fed by giving fresh pineapple, which is high in bromelain. If that doesn’t work, various powder remedies on the market such as S.E.P. (short for Stop Eating Poop), Forbid, or Deter can be purchased either at pet stores or from the vet. In Layla’s case, all of these remedies worked to a slight amount, however they weren’t 100% effective, and even a small bit of poop would cause an allergic reaction.

On to training and management. It was the matter of a couple days to get Layla happy and comfortable wearing a basket muzzle. Short, highly reinforcing training sessions and a low-pressure approach in which she could always get the muzzle off at first if she felt uncomfortable worked quickly and effectively. She now happily pushes her nose into the ‘treat basket’ to have it put on, and while she will paw at it when it is on for long periods she mostly just ignores it. Having her wear a basket muzzle outside slowed her poop eating down significantly. It’s certainly still possible for a dog to eat poop with a basket muzzle, but if the poop is frozen it does take a bit of time to smoosh through the holes of the muzzle enough so that she can eat it.

While accustoming her to the basket muzzle, I also spent several days reviewing the ‘leave it’ command with Layla. We practiced Leave It with treats on the edge of the table, treats on the floor, treats on her paws while she held a down-stay, and treats raining down around her head while she sat still. We also practiced Leave It with toys, both stationary and moving. Then I started doing ‘cold trials’ of Leave It. This included putting small piles of treats on the ground outside where we would go past them on our walk and using a nifty trick I learned from Sandy where a whole hot dog or other goody is placed in a bird suet feeder so that the dog can smell it but can’t immediately eat it if she ignores the ‘leave it’ command (a clever dog can still get the hot dog out, but it will give you a couple seconds to intervene).

So, at this point Layla was solid with Leave It and comfortable wearing her muzzle. We were ready for action! I didn’t clean up the yard for a couple days so there were plenty of tempting piles of Duke poop. Layla is only interested in frozen kibble-byproduct poop when there’s snow on the ground (no snow, no poop eating: apparently she needs the right atmosphere), so conditions were perfect. I spent several days going outside with her, cueing her to ‘leave it’ if she sniffed a pile of poop and rewarding her with clicks and treats (squeezy cheese, so that she could eat through the holes in her muzzle) for complying. She was doing well. Next, I faded my presence but continued to cue the Leave Its if I felt it was necessary. I stood at the top of the stairs in the backyard, and after I clicked she could run up to get her treat. I jackpotted uncued Leave Its.

After about a week of this, she was pretty good about leaving Duke poop alone, probably about 95% successful. Unfortunately for her, that little 5% margin of error was causing some pretty bad allergic reactions. She was getting benadryl 3-4 days a week to alleviate some of her allergy symptoms. At this point, I introduced the aversive.

Layla is quite sensitive to loud noises, so I decided to use an air horn. I wanted something that would be very startling to her, but that wouldn’t be so distressing that she would become afraid of being in the backyard. Herein lies the problem with using punishment. It’s such a balancing act: you need something that will be aversive enough to stop the behavior without being so aversive that it will stop all behavior (cause the dog to shut down) or be associated with the wrong thing (fallout). It needs to be clear to the dog which action caused the aversive, but the aversive should not be associated with you at all. It should seem to come out of nowhere. Having seen Layla’s reaction to the noise of the tornado sirens in our neighborhood or the emergency alert tone on the tv/radio, I settled on the air horn as a similar sound volume and intensity.

The air horn is loud but is very short-lasting and was easy to time precisely. At this point I continued to click and treat for leaving piles of Duke poop. However, if she actually began to eat a pile, I would sound the air horn briefly. She would jump and spit out the poop in her shock. Here’s the other important thing about aversives: timing is so important! I didn’t want to punish her for simply moving towards the poop, as she could have been innocently sniffing. I didn’t want to punish sniffing, because she needs to sniff before finding an appropriate place to go to the bathroom. There’s so much opportunity for fallout. This is another one of the reasons why positive reinforcement training is really so much better.

The aversive worked. The first winter I used this technique, it took two horn blasts to completely stop her poop eating behavior for the entire winter. Last winter, the behavior resurfaced. It only took one blast to stop it. This winter it has resurfaced again, and I will do the same thing as always (clicker, treats, and horn: reward appropriate behavior, punish dangerous behavior).

Ideally, I would like to have the behavior completely eliminated the first time the aversive was used, with no refreshers necessary. However, I understand that behaviors can be forgotten if they’re not practiced. Since we don’t have snow on the ground or frozen poopsicles around most months of the year (and I would have to move South if we did!), this behavior isn’t practiced. I learned to run fecal samples to diagnose intestinal parasites and protozoa when I was in school to become a vet tech. I couldn’t run a fecal today if my life depended on it. Since I haven’t done one or seen it done for years, I’ve simply forgotten the behavior. The same thing can happen to dogs, so I don’t sweat it if they forget something they haven’t practiced for a long time. We just review. Who knows, maybe this year I won’t even need the air horn at all! I’m looking forward to the day when a simple click-treat for leaving piles of poop is all the reminder she needs (“oh yeah, that stuff is no good to eat”).

So, I’m curious. Do you use any positive punishment in your training routine? What are your criteria for doing so, and which behaviors have you used it with? Coprophagia is one of only two behaviors I have ever purposefully punished Layla for in her life. (The other was nipping Duke’s heels when they were both running off-leash, which was very self reinforcing for her as she could control his movement but was a safety issue due to Duke’s severe hip dysplasia). I always feel guilty having to resort to punishment, as I know a more skilled trainer would not need to. After all, if a killer whale can be clicker-trained to pee in a cup and a cockatoo can be trained to hold still for a painful injection, anything is possible in dog training!

TLC Results

Shelton Benjamin vs. Christian
ECW Title (Ladder Match)
Results : Christian wins the ladder match over Shelton Benjamin to retain the ECW Championship.

Drew McIntyre vs. John Morrison
Intercontinental Title match
Winner: Drew McIntyre wins via pinfall over John Morrison to become the new Intercontinental Champion.

Mickie James vs. Michelle McCool Womens Title match
Winner: Michelle McCool wins via pinfall over Mickie James to retain the WWE Womens Championship.

Sheamus vs. John Cena WWE Title (Tables Match)
Winner: Sheamus wins the Table match against John Cena to become the new WWE Champion.

Batista vs. The Undertaker
World Championship (Chair Match)
Winner: The Undertaker wins via pinfall over Batista to retain the World Heavyweight Title.

Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton
Winner: Randy Orton wins via pinfall over Kofi Kingston.

D-Generation X vs Chris Jericho & Big Show
Unified Tag Team titles (TLC Match)
Winners: D-Generation X wins the TLC match over Chris Jericho & Big Show to win the Unified Tag team Championship belts.

WWE Friday Night Smackdown – December 11, 2009

After an amazing episode of Superstars yesterday I really don’t think anything will top that, unless Smackdown has a really good main event going into the PPV. With the PPV coming up, I assume it’s just going to be two hours of hype.

We open the show with the recap of Batista attacking Undertaker two weeks ago and last week. Well with Batista destroying Undertaker two weeks in a row, I assume he’s going to get destroyed at the PPV. From there we go to the annoying new opening song, which I still hate, just saying is all. The best announce team in WWE Todd & Matt welcome us to Smackdown as our main event is Batista v. Rey Mysterio in a street fight. Speaking of the devil, here he comes.

1. Batista comes out to the ring; oh boy no one can cut a promo like Dave <sarcasm>. He has the mic, not a good sign as he says he has something to get off his chest. He says he did not ask for the match with Rey tonight, he says Rey demanded the street fight. Batista continues by saying Rey doesn’t belong in the same ring with him, he continues by saying since he decided he wanted the title back people have been booing him. His response is he doesn’t care, well that makes two of us, was he talking about his matches or being booed? Because as far as his matches go, I don’t care! Batista keeps on rambling about not needing anyone, c’mon Dave; people who need people are the luckiest people!! Ok, Dave shut up now, let someone with talent have some camera time, at least Orton’s matches are watchable, as opposed to the next Kevin Nash here. Oh man, the camera zoomed in on his face, and he looks so freaking old, almost as bad as Taker. That is going to be a disaster of a match, speaking of which Dave starts to talk about Taker, as I am rapidly losing interest in this blah, blah crap. Batista says beating Undertaker is a formality, and everyone better get used to seeing him as World Champion. Well, that was ten minutes I’ll never get back again.
2. CM Punk & Luke Gallows v. Matt Hardy & R-Truth. CM Punk has the mic, at least he can cut a promo, learn a lesson Dave. Punk says pay attention; I think he’s talking to Batista there! Cheap plug for Jeff Hardy’s DVD, I haven’t watched it yet, but it looks pretty good. Should get a chance to watch it after the holidays. Punk says parents are buying the DVD for kids for Christmas, not good parenting according to Punk. Punk says kids will think they can fly after watching the DVD, and probably think they can do the impossible, but in reality after watching the DVD all you will be is a good for nothing junkie! Punk then steps on the DVD, then has Gallows stomp on it, as we get the introduction of Truth & Hardy, Hardy has a bag full of Hardy DVDs. Punk screaming at the crowd not to take the DVD as Matt’s handing it out to fans, that’s hilarious! CM Punk is just amazing on the mic and knows exactly how to fire up the crowd.  Punk tells the crowd to sell the DVD on E-Bay and tells Truth and Hardy their peddling drugs. Punk takes a microphone to the head from Truth sending him to the floor; Gallows and the ref go to check on Punk. The match finally starts with Gallows & Truth, Gallows gets Truth in the corner and tags in Punk who whips Truth in and gets caught with a pair of clotheslines, and a third takes him to floor as we go to commercial. We come back and Punk being double teamed, Matt with a near fall. Truth in and gets caught and Suplexed on the ropes, as Gallows tagged in. Gallows pounds on Truth in the corner and tags Punk back in. Punk and Truth slug it out, but Truth caught in a powerslam from Punk for a near fall. Punk blows a kiss at Matt, whatever that meant! Punk with an arm bar and crossface, tagging in Gallows who locks the Truth in the bearhug. Gallows rams Truth into the turnbuckle and brings in the Straight Edge Superstar, who hits a belly to back Suplex and goes to the apron. Punk with a springboard but gets a dropkick to the stomach from Truth who makes the tag to Matt Hardy. Matt comes in a house of fire on Punk laying a beating on CM Punk. Matt hits the big legdrop and Gallows for the save, Truth with a dropkick taking out the former Festus. Punk throws Truth out of the ring. Matt goes for Twist of Fate, countered to Go to Sleep countered, Matt throws Punk into Gallows who makes the blind tag, Matt hits Twist of Fate on Punk. Gallows comes in and connects with the big boot followed by the Twelfth Step for the pin. 3.75/5 Excellent opening match, very fast paced and great series of moves at the end. The former Festus is very good in his new character, much better than the Festus character. CM Punk could be a reverse version of Raven, with his own flock, which would be cool. But I’m sure they’d lose interest in an idea like that very quickly. After the commercial we go backstage to Vickie Guerrero with Eric Escobar and they are fighting in Spanish as Teddy Long asks what he said. Eric says people thought she was his mom, Vickie says Eric needs to go to the ring and face Chris Jericho now. Vickie starts screaming as Teddy Long is trying not to laugh. We now see Kane running into the Mountain Man Mike Knox. Knox says they’re the same, monsters no one understands. Knox says he enjoyed the match and wants a rematch, Kane says they are nothing alike and there is only one monster. Kane agrees that tonight there will be a rematch; Knox says you will be a broken monster, but Knox will ride in the ambulance with him. Kane starts to choke Knox who says choking can cause enjoyment over the body, ok creepy!
3. Eric Escobar v. Chris Jericho. I really don’t see anything in Escobar, just doesn’t look like he’s going to be a big star, just saying is all. Jericho is a legend and deserving future Hall of Famer and always puts on a great match, no matter who he’s with. Eric starts out pounding on Chris and hits a jumping side kick, followed by a clothesline. Jericho counters a blind charge into the corner, but Eric hits the Sky High on Jericho for a near fall. Jericho clotheslined over the top rope, as Vickie comes out and tells Eric she’s here to apologize as there is an addition detail to the match, it’s a handicap match as Jericho’s partner, and Big Show comes out. Great, another damn handicap match, this is ridiculous. What is this our third one this week, enough people, can we please come up with a new idea? As far as the match goes, I give up on it at this point.  Jericho wins with the Walls of Jericho, whatever. 2/5 was going good, and did not need the handicap crap, sick of handicap matches and don’t want to see any more of those, ever again. After the match Jericho has the mic, and guarantees the demise of D-X and the D-X army, as TLC is about wiping D-X off the planet forever. I for one would be happy to see that happen, but I doubt it will happen, can’t see D-X lose on PPV to Jerishow. Big Show says when D-X is in the hospital trying to find the will to walk, he wants them to remember their faces as the ones who end D-X.
4. Drew McIntyre comes out with the mic, and says why is it that Vince proclaimed him the future and Drew’s not on the cover of the new magazine. Drew says John Morrison is on the cover not him, and Drew beat John last week. We get a recap of last week’s amazing match between them, which I posted in my week in review. McIntyre asks why the crowd cheers for Morrison, because he’s American, because he does a fancy flip, because he’s champion? Drew says not for long as the crowd chants USA, Drew says John Morrison beating his is as fictitious as the Loch Ness Monster. We then hear bag pipes playing; please don’t be Roddy Piper, for the love of God, no. Thankfully, it’s not Piper, its John “Braveheart” Morrison, dressed as Mel Gibson in the movie Braveheart, very funny looking. Morrison with a bad Scottish accent says not to disrespect Mel Gibson. Drew says he looks ridiculous and it better be a joke, Morrison says Drew’s a joke and no one can understand a thing he says. Drew tells John this joking around is going to get him hurt and he needs to take Drew seriously. John says he didn’t know this was going to be a serious episode with Drew saying he’s the chosen one, John asks if he calls himself the chosen one because he has his head up Mr. McMahon’s ass. Drew tells John to drop the sword; John makes fun of Drew hanging with the legends kissing their asses. Morrison says Drew will never take his title, and Drew snaps and demands John stop making fun of him and his culture. This is funny, and I can’t wait for their match on the PPV, should be the highlight. Drew tells John to drop the sword and fight like a man. Morrison puts the sword down and asks why Drew thinks he runs the place just cause Vince gave him an endorsement. The slugfest begins and Drew runs into the crowd to get away from Morrison.
5. Mike Knox v. Kane. As JR would say, this will be a slobberknocker!  We get a battle between the two monsters of Friday nights; at least it’s not a Khali match! Knox is looking like the lost brother of ZZ Top with that massive beard! Knox starts the match pounding on the Big Red Machine, Kane counters with a big boot and Knox rolls out of the ring. Kane goes to pull Knox in and gets clotheslined on the ropes, Knox back in and hits a big boot. Mike has Kane in the corner and continues to pound Kane down, Knox with a shoulderblock in the corner followed by the big splash. Kane gets the knees up as Knox goes for a splash, Kane with the low dropkick on Knox and gets a near fall. Kane throws Knox in and follows with a clothesline then the backbreaker. Kane up top and misses the flying clothesline, Knox with a huge crossbody and almost wins the match. Knox goes for the neckbreaker, but Kane counters into the Big Red Chokeslam for the win. 2/5 Almost a squash match, I think Knox should’ve won to continue the feud, I think Knox could be a big star, just saying is all.
6. Mickie James & Maria v. Layla & Michelle McCool. Mickie James is looking as hot as ever, and it sure is nice to see Maria back, she was greatly missed! Look forward to seeing Maria on Apprentice next month. Michelle McCool is just way to overrated, she’s horrible in the ring, and bowling shoe ugly, she only gets a push because she’s with Undertaker. I really hope Mickie gets the title at the PPV, and maybe get rid of McCool for a while.  We start with Maria & McCool, as Maria kicks the daylights out of Michelle. Michelle no selling the moves and hits a backbreaker on the red head, then cheapshots James. McCool goes for the backbreaker but gets countered to a Hurricanrana, Mickie tagged in and McCool runs out tagging in Layla. Mickie with a nice Thesz Press, Layla runs into McCool and Mickie pins Layla. 2.5/5 All credit goes to Layla, Maria and Mickie; Michelle did next to nothing in there. Not a good match, after last week’s great women’s match.
7. Rey Mysterio v. Batista. I thought Rey was leaving for knee surgery; guess Vince doesn’t want him to take time off. Way to ride the guys to death McMahon, Rey hasn’t been as good in the ring in a long time though, all the knee injuries have made him very boring. Watch some of his old matches from Mexico, ECW and WCW; he was amazing back then, now it’s just drop toe hold, to the 619, which is just lame. Rey Mysterio tries to use his quickness but gets caught right away with a clothesline and gets tossed around like a ragdoll. Batista hits a huge kick to the chest of Mysterio, Rey using kicks to try and get some space, but gets caught coming off the ropes with another clothesline. Batista nails Rey in the back with another kick and slams Mysterio down hard, Batista puts Rey on his shoulder but Rey slides down. Rey sets Batista for 619 but Dave out of the way, Rey uses his quickness to knock Dave down as we go to commercial. We come back to Batista stretching Rey on the ring post, we see Rey going into the steps during the break. Batista whips Rey with the camera cable and rams Rey’s head into the table. Batista slams Rey face first on the table and throws Mysterio back in the ring. Batista uses a chin lock on Rey, than continues to pound Mysterio down. Mysterio had a brief flurry of moves before the commercial, but it’s basically been a squash match. Batista goes out of the ring and grabs a chair, sets it in the middle of the ring. Batista attempts a Batista Bomb, Rey fights out and drop toe hold on the chair by Rey. Rey with a springboard senton and sets up Dave for the 619, and gets a near fall. Rey grabs the chair and hits Dave in the chest and head with chair, but gets caught with a spear. Batista picks up Rey and hits a spinebuster; Batista cracks Rey in the head with the chair for the win. 3/5 other then a pair of flurries from Rey it was all Batista as Rey got destroyed. It was what it was meant to be, a chance for Batista to show his power. After the match Batista puts Rey’s head in the chair and climbs to the second rope as the gong clangs and the lights go out. Where Rey was, Undertaker now is and The Undertaker pounds the crap out of Dave in the corner. Undertaker grabs the chair and Batista bails out of the ring, as Batista crawls up the ramp, Undertaker’s music hits.

Match Recap

1. CM Punk & Luke Gallows over Matt Hardy & R-Truth 3.75/5
2. Chris Jericho & Big Show over Eric Escobar 2/5
3. Mike Knox pinned by Kane 2/5
4. Mickie James & Maria over Layla & Michelle McCool 2.5/5
5. Batista pinned Rey Mysterio 3/5

This was not as good as last week’s episode of Smackdown, between the handicap match and the battle of the monsters, really brought the show down. I like Mike Knox, and I think used right he could be a big star, like Batista and Big Show, but more of a mad genius sort of gimmick. I think Mike could pull that off. The show was still way better then RAW this week, but could still use some improvements.

I made this recipe a few weeks ago and they turned out to be a test run.  They were alot of work, messed up my kitchen, took too much time, and were worth it (even if I did only get to eat 3 or 4 myself).  Drin absolutely LOVED these cookies.

With a mouthful of crumbs and ginger wafting on his voice he declared: “You have to make these for the Christmas party.”  This was while I was still elbow deep in flour and frosting, standing amidst a sea of dirty bowls, pots, and pans, and wondering if I’d be able to frost them as fast as he was devouring them – I was thinking, ‘NOT’.

Well, as I mentioned, a few weeks have passed, and still he’s asking for his cookies.  I guess that means, there will be Big Huge Soft Frosted Molasses Cookies at the open house tomorrow, much to Drin’s delight.  Iwonder if they’ll go with beer?

Drin’s Favorite Big Huge Soft Frosted Molasses Cookies
           adapted from:  Susan Branch – Christmas From the Heart of the Home

Ingredients
1 cup white sugar
1 cup butter, softened
1 cup molasses
1 cup sour cream
3 teaspoons baking soda
1 tablespoon white vinegar
2 teaspoons ground ginger
1/2 teaspoon salt
3 eggs, beaten
4 cups flour, sifted
2 cups confectioners’ sugar, packed then sifted
5 1/2 tablespoons milk
2 teaspoons butter
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 tablespoons milk (additional)

Directions
Cookies
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Cream butter and sugar together well.  Add molasses and sour cream.  Mix well.
Mix the baking soda with the vinegar (remember grade school science experiments?).
Add it to the batter along with the ginger and salt.
Stir in beatn eggs then sifted flour.
Drop by rounded tablespoonfulls onto a greased cookie sheet, at least 2 inches apart, and bake for 10 to 12 minutes. 
Remove from oven, allow to cool on the sheet for a few minutes, then remove to rack to cool completely.
Frosting
Heat together the milk and butter.  With a wooden spoon beat sugar with hot milk and butter mixture.  Beat in extract. 
If necessary, add additional hot milk until creamy and spreadable. 
Work quickly and frost cookies immediately. 
**If frosting begins to harden, beat in another drop of hot milk.  Frost thinly and let cookies dry before stacking.

Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas!

There are certain questions that no number of PhDs nor years ensconced between the leaves of books can sate.

Today my best tutorial group was in pensive mode and as the post-presentation activity languished untouched, the following poured forth:

When is a genocide a genocide?

Why is Sabra and Shatila, as well as Srebrenica, not classed as a genocide?

What is the difference between a terrorist, a militant, a guerilla and a freedom fighter?

Why are the Palestinians classed as ‘terrorists’ and the Israelis not?

Why is one or two Israeli lives equivalent to hundreds of Palestinians?

Why is Deir Yassin not classed as a genocide or an act of terror?

What is the difference between an act of terror and a genocide?

And, asked with utmost sincerity:

Will you mark me down if I called Palestinians ‘terrorists’ in my essay?

The questions are so grave that my involuntary nervous tic of smirking was unavoidable.

How can we decide what makes a genocide and what makes a massacre?

How do you decide whether someone’s cause is more justified than that of another?

It is not possible to capture such issues within a definitive framework.

A framework – yes.

But rigid?

Never.

Mickie James def. Beth Phoenix and Natalya in a Triple Threat Match to decide the No. 1 Contender to the Women’s Championship
As Women’s Champion Michelle McCool and Layla sat ringside, Mickie James overcame both Beth Phoenix and Natalya to become the No. 1 Contender to the gold. After Natalya put Mickie in the Sharpshooter, The Fabulous Firebird grabbed the opportunity to execute a Glam Slam on the occupied Dungeon-trained Diva. But when Beth went for the victory, Mickie suddenly knocked her from the ring, capturing the huge win for herself, along with the hope of becoming the Women’s Champion for the fifth time.

After the bell, a fed-up Mickie confronted Michelle, hurling the Champion back into her chair. This sparked a double-team attack by Michelle and Layla, which lit the fuse for an explosive rescue by the returning Maria.

Multimedia Links;
Download; Triple Threat Match
WWE.com Digitals

Deck the halls!  

With a mere 19 days ’til Christmas, I finally settled down to watch last season’s romantic-comedy-just-in-time-for-the-holidays, Four Christmases.  Vince Vaughn’s character, Brad, finally takes his girlfriend home and, in the midst of yuletide merriment, she discovers that Brad legally changed his name – from Orlando.  Brothers Denver and Dallas were introduced, and Brad explained that they were all named in a very Brooklyn Beckham-esque way.  You’re forgiven, Brad.  Posh, are you listening?

Speaking of the holidays, on my recent travels I heard tots answering to Lyle, Hugo, Mara and Cecily – or I suppose Sicily, but let’s hope it was the former.

As for movies, I’m dying to see Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law in the upcoming Sherlock Holmes movie.  While other girls were reading Anne of Green Gables, I was off in Victorian England, solving crimes with Holmes and Watson.  There are already hints of franchise potential, not unlike Pirates of the Caribbean, which got me thinking – if Sparrow could pop as a boy’s name in the wake of Captain Jack, will this film have a similar impact?  Sherlock and Holmes are out, and John is evergreen.  But how ’bout Watson?  I’ll be watching the boards!

Elsewhere in the blogosphere:

• Sebastiane has been featuring classics with all of their international variations included.  Think Andrew is a bit obvious?  Try Dreves.  Cathy and Cate don’t appeal?  Call your daughter Catherine by the unusual short form Trine – or opt for the variant Cathereau;
• My new favorite name of the week has to be Lillemor - also from Sebastiane’s site.  I’ve been puzzled by the so-fashionable Moa in Sweden.  Turns out Moa is a nickname for Lillemor, one that has eclipsed the original.  Apparently Lillemor is considered stodgy by modern Swedes, but in the US?  I think she’d offer an unexpected way to get to Lily – and fit just right with names like Eleanor, too;
• Over at Names from Adam to Eve, Laura wrote of her love for Hester, nn Hettie.  I’m a fan, too, so it is nice to see Hester get some love;
• Bewildertrix spotted a newborn girl named Montanna Skye.  It was an Aussie birth announcement, so maybe the parents don’t get the joke?  Or did they vacation in Big Sky Country and … cancel that thought;
• For Real Baby Names spotted a tot christened Basil Leif.  I suspect he’ll be one of those guys who refuses to hand over his driver’s license for fear his friends will discover the L isn’t for Leon or Lawrence;
• You’ve heard about New York’s just-released baby names of 2008 list, right?And Sophia and Jayden coming out on top?  Check out the Nameberry post for details and discussion;
• It’s that time again - Nymbler has released November’s Top 10 favorite names.  They’re  the usual suspects: Charlotte, Ava, Ella, Finn, Jack, Amelia, Claire, Henry, Grace and Benjamin.  
• But then there’s the far more interesting Top 5 Brand New Names: 
  • A twist on Brianna and Riley, Briley;
  • The lovely Cosima;
  • Word name Fable, a choice almost single-handedly launched by blogger Girls Gone Child; 
  • The literary Bronte;
  • Starbaby-inspired Nahla.

Speaking of starbabies, it was a busy week.  Thanks to Celebrity Baby Blog for the heads up on the following:

• Maya Rudolph welcomed Lucille, a little sister for Pearl - what a great sibset.  Please leave a comment if you hear about the girls’ middle names;
• Scrubs’ Judy Reyes welcomed Leila Rey.  Leila is the new Hailey – it is impossible to say how many there really are thanks to Layla, Lailah, Leyla, Laila …  But Rey is a clever nod towards mom’s surname;
• Singer Lisa Loeb welcomed daughter Lyla Rose;
• Martin Brodeur of the New Jersey Devils welcomed his fifth child – son Maxime Phillipe.  For those of you who don’t follow hockey, it’s mahr TAN.  He’s from Montreal.  Older siblings are Anthony, William, Jeremy and Anabelle Antoinette; 
• Also in the Wide World of Sports, Chunky soup pitchman/Philadelphia Eagle Donovan McNabb welcomed his fourth child.  Son Devin James joins sisters Alexis and Sariah and brother Donovan;
• Heavenly Joy!  It’s a girl for music producer Rodney Jenkins and his wife, Joy Enriquez.  It’s not only an exclamation, it’s her name.

That’s all for this week.  Thanks for reading!

I love it when my dogs communicate with me clearly and creatively. I think that the ability to communicate like this requires a solid relationship and a foundation based in trust and the ability to explore options freely. This is part of why I love clicker training  and the Control Unleashed program so much: both build this foundation in and allow ample opportunities for the relationship to blossom.

As a puppy, Layla tended to go for whatever she wanted at full speed!

Layla has become an awesome little communicator. This wasn’t always the case! Subtlety is not one of her key character traits, and when she was little she oftentimes eschewed communication attempts in favor of just bowling through life in full-out pursuit of her current goal. This involved snapping numerous collars as a puppy when she took off after small furry critters, landing on top of my head to scream at a squirrel in the tree, and jumping straight up to land with all four feet on the kitchen counter, among other things. If I need a laugh, all I have to do is remember the day she climbed a tree in hot pursuit of a neighborhood cat (after snapping the plastic buckle on her collar, leaving me standing with a leash and half a collar, but no dog). When she got just over the height of my head, she suddenly realized what had happened and stopped dead, then after some coaxing jumped down to me. The look on her face when she realized how high she had climbed cracks me up every time I recall it!

She sits up very straight and serious...

One of her little character quirks that makes me smile is how she “talks” to me. Layla has a running commentary on her life, and often feels the need to share specific events with me. If something happens that is especially exciting or horrible, she will seek me out. When she runs into the room and looks at me, I will ask her if she needs to tell me something. Usually, she will jump up next to me. I put my arm out at Layla-shoulder-height, and she snuggles in so that my arm is draped across her shoulders and her side is pressed up against me. She sits ramrod-straight and serious next to me for several moments, then gets up and leave once she has “told me” all about it. This brief communication is enough to inform me of most events. However, if something especially wonderful or horrifying happens, she will take this a step further. Before snuggling in next to me, she licks around my mouth and the lower half of my face frantically, then assumes the position. This isn’t something I taught her, but rather a routine she has developed over time. And it’s amazing how much information I glean from it! Just by paying attention to her body language, I can often tell whether she’s trying to tell me about something wonderful and exciting that happened to her (I got to clean up a raw egg that fell on the floor!) or something scary or upsetting (someone stepped on my foot and I almost died!). Frequently after “talking” to her, I will become curious enough to go find out exactly what happened that she was trying to tell me about. I don’t believe in telepathic communication with animals, but I’ve learned that you can find out an awful lot by ‘listening’ to their body language.

Thursday night, Layla again astounded me with her ability to reason and communicate. She’s been on pretty strict rest restrictions for the past six days due to  a very scary incident last week where she became partially paralyzed for about 24 hours. This meant no going up or down steps, limited jumping (such as on and off furniture), short leash walks wearing her Gentle Leader, and no playing. She’s been a little trooper through it all, but she’s also been understandably very excited when walk time rolls around. Finally, she can DO something! She’s been locked out on our four-season porch for a good portion of the past week, as that provided the best space for her to recover (and in fact I slept there with her the first three nights of her recovery).

Anyway, she was sedated for some pelvic radiographs early on Thursday afternoon. The sedative that was used was partially reversible. She was still groggy after being given the reversal drug, but she went from being fast asleep to walking out of the clinic under her own steam quite quickly as the reversal drug took effect. Once we got home, she went back to sleep. She was still a little quieter than normal that night, but alert and aware of her surroundings throughout the evening. Anyway, when walk time rolled around we began preparing as normal. Coats, gloves, and hats for the people. Leashes, bait bags, poop bags, training treats, and Gentle Leaders for the dogs. But suddenly we realized that Layla was nowhere in sight. She usually watches us prepare for a walk with her tail wagging, then runs to the door and sits there as soon as we are ready to leave. But now she was missing.

I called her, and she trotted into the living room and looked at me. Then she very clearly looked at my dog walking outfit, looked me in the eyes again, and trotted back onto the four-season porch, where she curled up on her dog bed. I cracked up! This is a dog who NEVER misses a walk, but clearly she was aware that the sedative was still making her feel a bit funny. “Not tonight, mom. I’m still a sick dog tonight.”

Her bed in the living room was much closer

What I love most about this sort of thing is how clearly she can reason things out and make her choices known. The porch is where sick dogs stay. For the first four nights of her recovery, she wasn’t even allowed to go on walks and was completely confined there. She has beds all over the house as well as a crate in the living room, but she very deliberately turned and went to her bed on the porch rather than choosing a closer bed. She didn’t leave her bed on the porch until everyone had returned from the walk and taken off their dog walking clothes. Then she rejoined the family for the rest of the night.

To me, experiences like this are one of the most precious moments of living with a dog. Communication goes both ways, and it’s easy to forget this fact sometimes as I focus on training another skill or practicing something Layla has already learned. But it’s just as important for me to listen to Layla’s guidance at times, and to respect her wishes when it is reasonable to do so. This is the joy of living with a dog. Have you listened to your dog today? I know I have, and she had a lot to say.

Somewhere you are lost in oblivion,
racing through uncertain dreams
in search of Ishq-e-Majazi – the Love of Layla and Majnun
and of Ishq-e-Haqiqi – the Love of eternal Divine

It is here, dear one,
in this magnificent palace of unspeakable wonder,
singing the praises of beloved Mumtaz
and glowing with the miracles of the Qur’an;
the Love of Creation and Creator forever married
and sparkling in blissful union.

Come, you are wounded by Love;
Like a freedom fighter, you stood with open arms
before an army of war tanks and planes from above.
You let them blast their shells into your frail body
and then watched their arsenal self-destruct
as you burst into a million rose petals lit with fiery flames

Let celestial winds carry your burning desire to this domed jewel,
Let your tears bathe in the pool and witness transformation
Let your blood tell the garden its tale of massacre and sacrifice
Let it sprout like a fountain and fill the rivers with longing
Let your ashes kiss this soil and bloom into revolutionary resurrection

Lift the veil and step into the invisible world
Where dervishes dance in the courtyard,
Where sweet music plays for every created soul,
and where Angels tell you:
outside of this was the real dream-world

Yes, come closer
This mausoleum of Love is alive,
the beauty is deeper,
and the ghost of the architect is speaking:

I am Shah Jahan
Let my insanity be on the tongue
of every Romantic that comes after me
and let them say:
I will build kingdoms in my soul
finer than this wondrous palace,
and I will paint holy verses in my heart
more beautiful than any calligrapher can brush
Such is the pledge of my madness

O’ seekers of Truth!
Enough lies and falseness
plague the people of our world;
Do not even speak to your Beloved
If your Love is not True like this

~ Jehanzeb

Holidays with my family is as painful as it gets for me. Add one sister as a new Aggie, two sisters bringing dudes (one an Aggie himself, the other, um, well, words don’t really do justice), and an “Amazing Race” contest–and I’m ready to lay in front of Dad’s tractor.

Too painful for me to even take pictures. So most of these are courtesy of my former sister, current Aggie Kate. It was nice knowing you Killa.

Nephew K-Beck is pretty good company for Emma

Team Feast–this isn’t going to end well

Team Salty Dogs–a little more team love

Though Emma was a quiet leader in the egg course, it went well

This went better than expected–until Speed freaked out at the end

I see know way this ends well

Emma did better than any of the kids

One picture of Speed eating an MRE is all I can stomach

So, you know, a fun holiday.

I tell a lie – the second book is a little gem and while it scores less on the academic front (in terms of analytical and theoretical framework) I am secretly deeply charmed by it.

Comprising 20 first-person narratives by Muslim women in a northern British town, their insights are gentle, engaging and by turns compelling.

And as I near my conclusion, one quote jumped out more than others.

Reflecting on meeting her Algerian husband at the age of 16 (circa 1980s), Rabia notes the manner in which religion in the context of relationships has emerged to the fore:

I never asked him anything about Islam. […] Nowadays, I think a young girl meeting a Muslim boy, it would be the first point of conversation [...] I was just interested in him as a person but not where he’d come from or his culture or his religious background.

The final sentence is possibly the most innocent and beautiful I’ve read in a while.

Sure, it’s no Kundera, but its simplicity and veracity are so touching.

Maybe that’s how we used to be before 9/11.

Just a society falling in love for who the other person was, not where they were from or what denomination or faith.

I want to go back to that.

Because I am there already, even if certain elements in society still have to catch up to it.