I applied to Lee University only three weeks before the fall semester began in the summer of 2005. I had just graduated from FCA in Denver and, much like some malicious mirror formed to reflect future events, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my self, let alone my life. I had made application to move to Israel with my friend, Zac. However, things were uncertain concerning my visa, and rather than wait around to hear from a foreign government, I decided to go to college, to the delight of parents and grandparents a like.

I moved into Medlin dormitory, a legendary hall known for its age and deprecation. It was so old, in fact, that my grandfather had lived there when he attended Lee, just after the campus was purchased by the Church of God from Bob Jones University. If I unlocked my door, it would glide open, pulled down by gravity. My room was underground, literally, and sinking. The foundation of the building had begun to shift, and because of this book and cd and thing in my room leaned to the left, just a little.

For the first few months, I would sit alone in my dorm room, the door stopped open by natural forces, listening to what would later be described as “indie shit” music.

This is the story of how I met Josh Moblo, and subsequently, everyonne else. He walked past my room and heard music blaring from my modest speakers. “Hey cheif,” he said. “Is that the ‘Owls’?” In an instant I went from knowing no one in Cleveland to knowing everyone. Josh introduced me to all of his friends, whom all swiftly became my friends. There was Josh of course, and Jaime, Alex and Jesse (room mates my sophomore year), Kevin and Chalcraft (room mates my senior year) Amy, Nathan, BJ, Grant, Lauren (x2), Chainsaw (also known as Aleighsa) and Matt (a childhood friend that I reconnected with through Josh). Because of Josh, my entire life in Cleveland was different, bearable even. Sometimes great.

None of these friends live in Cleveland anymore, and I lament that. I find myself propping my apartment door open sometimes when I play music.

Downtown Cleveland is full of old rotting brick buildings covered in green moss and lined with weeds and dandelions. Many of the buildings are empty and uninhabited. On the weekends, few cars drive down any road there save Broad or Ocoee. If you ever want to seek out that kind of loneliness, where not only are you the only person where you are, but the only person who still is, these few densely packed buildings are where you need to be. A post-apocalyptic sensation will wash over you, and if you arent careful, you might feel the urge to begin society anew. When I was a carless freshmen at Lee University, it was a wonderful place to go and take pictures.

Jaime, Josh, Alex and myself would brave the barren streets, accompanied by old SLR cameras and, on occasion, Jaime would carry a pair of brass knuckles. I had recently bought my camera with money gained from selling plasma. I loved to tell people that I had bought the camera with my blood, which, essentially, was true.

We would explore the damp and moldy alley ways, the easily climbable low-level billboard signs, the parking lot structures no longer safe enough to hold any amount of weight. One of our favorite area’s was the old woolen mill, and empty building (for the most part) which was assuredly haunted. Many of the windows had been busted out by rouge rocks thrown by juvenile hands, many of the walls covered in gang signs, or what rich white college kids would assume to be gang signs anyways. One more than one occasion we were chased off the property, though we had nothing more dangerous than camera’s. Whoever claimed right to the building at the time still didn’t trust us.

There was a an old gypsy who owned a store called “Taneeke’s.” She had a camera that, she claimed, would take a photograph of your aura. She sold her own incense, small statues, oils that would bless objects if rubbed upon them. She also sold old maps of Cleveland and, when she had them in stock, fire crackers. She was just across the street from the Old Woolen Mill, and we would visit her often.

I used to wear an old military jacket I was fond of, on the shoulder were stitched three red stripes, the meaning of which I didnt know. I wore this jacket to Taneeke’s once, and only once. I approached the cash register to buy some incense, sitting with Taneeke was a large Indian man, maybe in his 50’s, with long black braids. He saw may jacket and asked “Did you earn those stripes boy?”

“No” I responded.

“Were did you get ‘em?”

Fearing that telling him I bought it at a thrift store would be a bad idea, I said “A friend gave them to me.”

“Hell, he should be beaten with a stick, why, if he were here I’d beat him myself.”

Tanneeke stepped in, “Go easy on the boy, Hawk.” Great, his name was Hawk.

The old indian glared at me until I left the store. Outside awaited Josh, Jaime and Alex. “You look pale,” said Jaime.

“I always look pale,” I said.

I never wore that jacket again.

Los Angeles, California

In an unexpected turn of events, Voices of Lee have advanced to the season finale of NBC’s “The Singoff”.

“Look” said an ecstatic Danny Murray, the groups director, “No one is more surprised than I am. From the very beginning, I never saw this group of kids going very far in life. I’m sure we’re all a little shocked.”

One item worth noting during the competition has been the group’s wardrobe, which appears to have been taken directly from Old Navy’s Winter catalog.

While sources have not been confirmed as to the exclusivity of the Voices wardrobe contract, one top-level Old Navy exec who spoke with The Insurrectionist off the record said, “Let’s just say we’re a little excited. Watching those kids singing Michael Jackson songs while wearing Old Navy 2009 action fleece brought a tear to my eye.”

For now America can only hold it’s breath to see if the Voices will show up on Monday sporting Argyle Crew-Knit Sweaters or matching Cable-Knit Cardigans.

Developing…

This is a great example on how to use college as a spring-board for a future career.  These students are all getting their degree and utilizing an activity at school to potentially propel themselves into a recording contract.  These are not all theater or music majors.  In fact only two out of the ten members are majoring in music.  The other majors include biology, psychology, health science, advertising, and journalism.  Voices of Lee college acapella group is the perfect example of what I have written in my book “9 Secrets to Getting the Most Out of College and speak to students about.  They all joined an extra curricular activity that could be changing the course of their life forever.  Make sure you watch the finals and see how far they go.  This is their latest performance below.

Congratulations to the Beelzebubs from Tufts University and Voices of Lee from Lee University on making it to the Top 3 in the premier season of NBC’s The Sing Off!

The Beelzebubs – The Who Medley

Voices of Lee – Beatles Medley

The third finalist is Nota, an all-male sextet from Puerto Rico. They’re probably the favorite to win.

Nota – Down by Jay Sean

Make sure you tune in for the live finale on NBC this Monday, December 21 at 8/7c!

(Or this one from later in that same year… I was a bit of a defeatist asshole at some point… And I think this is around the time I started to over-commatize everything…)

My mom expects me to believe that none of this is my fault. Just the idea is laughable. How can you say that anyone has had more impact on the failure that is my life up to this point than me? The answer is no one. Now, I don’t constantly find myself mired in self-loathing. Rather, more often than not, I’m completely apathetic about my choices whether wrong or right. I just find that no matter how much I know I should care, or feel I need to care, it just isn’t there. Everyone’s life is supposed to be a journey, and some of the people I know have had some sort of positive life-changing event that completely altered their perspective on life. Sadly, I can’t seem to find that story in my heart. I have a feeling that I’m not the only one. The only honesty I could put to this paper from my soul is to try to discover the reason(s) that I or anyone could ever be this way. I wasn’t always this way. If my mom is right, and it’s not my fault, then where does this come from? And why?

It’s easy to blame myself for all of my problems and shortcomings. Easier than blaming anyone else, which is odd. I don’t mean that I shouldn’t take responsibility for my actions and mistakes, I don’t mean that. I mean to say that it’s an easy out to just blame myself and add more and more to this weight that I find myself carrying around each day. One of the many reasons is that am easily distracted. I have been diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. I find myself drifting away from the task at hand, and more often than not, never coming back. In seventh grade I was a bit of a loner. Though surrounded by the same group of compatriots that I had known since I first walked the halls of the fabled Westwood Baptist Church pre-school facility, I didn’t feel like I really knew anybody. My only real friends were my peers in band class. Music is a complete ‘out’ for me because there are no rules. Anything can and invariably does happen in music. My classmates and I knew this, and we loved it.

I come from a broken home. I make no excuses for this, lots of people have come from far worse and achieved far greater than I could ever hope to achieve at this point in my life. Nonetheless, it is a clear contributing factor to the way I feel about life, love, and whatever else in the world can’t be defined by life or love. If my parents hadn’t gotten divorced and my father hadn’t moved away so that I could only see him for a weekend every two weeks, perhaps I would be a completely different person. Perhaps I would be the same, but I doubt it. I think I would be able to ride a bike, at least. Oh, and I would probably be able to actually and truly feel love.

I know I am loved. I know that there are people that love me. There are people that I love. I just don’t feel loved. I can’t let myself trust it. If Dad could look Mom right in the face and say that he loved her, then go on a business trip and cheat on her, then how is that any different than either of them looking at me and saying the same thing? I wish I could relate this paranoia solely to my parents, but alas, I cannot. I can’t trust anybody. In my own romantic ‘escapades’ I’ve found it comes up time and time again, and each time I fail at not being an idiot, and if its not my fault then surely it could be my father’s, right? I’m not sure where so I can’t quote it, but in the Bible I’m sure it says something about the sins of the father are put upon the son. I’m pretty sure its something like that. Of course, this fits in with my mother’s argument, since she only seems to blame everything on my father. I mean, sure, he did a horrible thing, but… he’s my dad.

I wish he’d been around to help me do my homework. Maybe then I would have had some incentive to do it. Maybe I wouldn’t have repeated the seventh grade. Maybe I wouldn’t have lost all my friends who moved on and forgot about me. I don’t even see them but maybe a couple of times a year. Which is about as often as I see my dad. Though still more often than I see my supposed Heavenly Father.

Through the course of my entire life, I may have seen three examples of the Hand of God at work. The beauty of the sights and sounds of nature at peace. The calm stillness of absolute quiet, except for my own heartbeat. And the fleeting feeling of complete peace and happiness when you hold a sleeping baby in your arms, knowing that, for that moment, you are the entire world to her. That feeling of so much potential and unconditional love. Just wrapped up into a little ball with a mouth and a diaper. If only they could stay that way. Now I sound like my grandparents. Remembering how sweet we all were as babies, and using those memories to fuel a love for us during those oh-so trying holidays. Isn’t that what we all do, though, use our memories as a Rosetta Stone to translate emotion from page to screen? Cause after all, at heart, we’re all just really bad actors. Never able to keep our emotions very far under the surface.

So maybe my mom is right. Just maybe this time she knows what she’s talking about. Perhaps its not all my fault. I could just be a product of my circumstances that were out of my control. Which is probably a more dangerous way to look at life. Well at least I can always remember the times I failed on my own. Unless I only failed because that’s how I was raised? Wow, thanks a lot life…

]]> http://bobrasher.wordpress.com/2009/11/19/strengthsquest-07/ Thu, 19 Nov 2009 14:00:39 +0000 bobrasher http://bobrasher.wordpress.com/2009/11/19/strengthsquest-07/

(The following was written for a college project in the Fall of 2007. Its like a snapshot of who I was at the time. I read it now and I feel like I don’t recognize the person its describing.)

The results of my StrengthsQuest survey seem to describe parts of me fairly accurately. Upon first glance it may not appear so, but after reading the full description they struck me as very much a part of who I am as not only a student, but also as a person. My themes, from highest to lowest, are as follows: Strategic; Adaptability; Ideation; Communication; Command.

I think the theme that fits me best is Strategic. The site describes a strategic person as someone who can easily find patterns and paths in solving a problem. When looking for a specific solution, I can see the many different ways to get to that solution and decipher for myself (or others) the best path based on all of the possible outcomes of those paths. I know as I am typing this that I can pick and choose the words which are most likely to ensure maximum knowledge transference. Just this afternoon a friend and I were playing ‘The Movie Game’ and I found myself thinking several steps ahead in an unnecessary number of directions from each actor to movie, etc. It becomes a good bit easier to win, though it does feel at times as though I’m cheating by using my latent mutant abilities to score. I hate coming out of a movie, or reading a book, and thinking about all of the divergent storylines that detract my attention from the main thread. Not that it becomes confusing, but because I’ve usually already deciphered the codes and disarmed the bombs in my head, so why can’t the characters just get it done a little faster? Exclamation point. I know it seems as though I may be complaining about these scenarios, however I smugly sit with a sick smile of self-satisfaction at the conclusion that I am just much quicker than those around me, but…. not in a bad way?

My second theme, Adaptability, I’m having a slight dispute with myself over. It supposedly means that I live in the moment. I guess that’s true, but mostly because I would end up having an anxiety attack if I really felt any pressure to do anything in regards to my future before the last minute. Its not so much that I’m not concerned with my future, or that I don’t care, as it is that I know that time is fluid and all the worrying I do about my choices and second-guessing myself would be more likely to come back to haunt me than the actual choices and last-minute calls I have to make. Luckily, paired with Strategic, I should be able to find my way back on to the right track and get back to work.

I think that the second and third strengths were accidentally loaded in the wrong order on the page, because it seems that Ideation fits me much better. People with Ideation are always looking for obscure connections. Not just obscure connections like Kevin Conroy (the voice of Batman on Batman: TAS) and Christopher Reeve (Superman) were roommates at Julliard, which is true, but also connections in life and in other ideas and beliefs. Well, at least that’s how the site says it. I hear Ideation and immediately I’m hit with the word ‘Idea’. An Idea is a beautiful thing. It is the world at its most pure state. Until someone tries to bring an Idea into a reality, it can neither be proven nor discredited. It can only be believed. Faith is an Idea. Love is an Idea. Apparently a satisfactory third movie in a Marvel movie franchise is an Idea. I get up each day and as I walk from one class to the next, I have all these brilliant Ideas that, until I get them onto paper, are completely infallible. I suppose I could make some connection here between Adaptability and Ideation, because the Ideas all seem to be so great at the time, but upon further reflection fall apart. I don’t think I need to do that, though I guess I just did, didn’t I?

The longer I let these thoughts sit with me, the more I begin to agree with all five of them. Even if I may not agree with the order they were given, it doesn’t matter, because as an Adaptable human being I am in a constant state of flux. I may not necessarily agree with all of the points given for each either, but I’ve decided to just sit back and watch myself this semester and see if maybe I just wasn’t watching the whole show all this time. Perhaps I’ve just been waiting for me to get to the good parts.

What’s all this hype about student evaluations? It seems that some collegiate institutions, such as Lee University, place a surprising emphasis on their student evaluations. For those of you not in the collegiate loop, professors are rated by their students each semester in a simple questionnaire administered close to the end of each term. For professors with tenure, this is no biggie, just a bunch of whiny kids who think you need to stop giving so many lectures because your nose whistles when you talk. For professors without tenure, or even worse, those looking to get a job, these evaluations are their only hope for success. If I’m not catering to the student who really wants an easy way out of his required Humanities course, then I’m in serious danger of getting the axe.

Now, you might respond that the proportion of these students is low enough not to constitute any risk to professors who want to keep their classes rigorous. And I would respond by saying, “You’re right. Except…” Except that Lee University is touted as a “Second-Chance Institution” where “Christ is King.” This proves to be a very lethal combination to those instructors wishing to actually use the hours of research they’ve slaved over in graduate school. Instead of having 10% of your students wanting to get their D’s and get out, you now have up to half of your class (and sometimes more) just wanting to mark this course off of their transcript for the rest of their lives. If a higher-up gets a sampling of evaluations from one of these courses, a professor who hands out extra-credit like peppermints at your grandmother’s church looks mighty good compared to the one who doesn’t believe in “extra credit.”

Am I saying that student evaluations are a bad thing? By no means. What I am saying is that in an institution like Lee University, they can’t be our primary mode of weeding out young professors who are normally forced to teach nothing but core classes. This approach will slowly weed out our rigorous professors and, as is normal in today’s society, pull the highest thinkers down to the level of the lowest for the sake of “equality” and “fairness.” It will drive out our best and brightest and leave the institution with an area of influence about as large as its buildings can reach.

Larrques Cunningham is a 6-foot-5 forward at NAIA Lee University in Tennessee.

6′5″.

FROM JERRY REDMAN’S FUTURELIFE

I ran into Certainty last week. I’d forgotten how hard he can punch.

He was waiting for me in a class at a local university where I was guest-lecturing. Since I was lecturing at a Christian school, I knew that Certainty would probably make an appearance, but I guess I had forgotten how disagreeable Certainty can be. You see, Certainty and I used to be very good friends. In fact, I was one of his best promoters. But the day came when I began to realize that my faith was requiring something more than Certainty could deliver, something that made room for Discovery, Question, Wondering, as well as Mystery and Amazement. Certainty has no use for any of these guys and no use for anyone who might be willing to befriend them. So, Certainty told me I had to make a choice. I chose the journey to which I knew I was being invited, and Certainty and I went our separate ways.

This new journey required me to actually deepen my faith in Jesus, not abandon it. But, this deepening of faith also required me to let go of some things Certainty had insisted I hold on to. This letting go was neither easy or well-received. Certainty has lots of followers, and they don’t respond very well to those of us who have felt a call to experiencing more of just Him and less of the stuff that may or may not be about Him. During this journey I have discovered that I had to make a choice: I could either follow Christ or I could follow the religion of Christianity, but I couldn’t do both. I chose Christ. Not everybody has been excited about that choice. I don’t care. The choice wasn’t about them anyway.

Which leads me back to that classroom last week and my interaction (maybe more like a collision) with Certainty. He’s still just as loud, just as insistent, just as willing to belittle and dismiss. But I also noticed he didn’t have much company. In fact, he didn’t have any company in the room. There were, however, several in the room who were hungry for more of Jesus, because they seemed to know that they could trust Jesus with their questions and wondering. I told one of them something I know to be absolutely true: Certainty will fail you. When it does, that’s when the arms of Jesus are the most open and available. Of that I am certain.

Cleveland, Tenn.

In a move consistent with the last 10 years, Lee University has enrolled more students while the amount of parking spaces remains relatively the same.

“I was really looking forward to living off campus,” said Ben Hollings, a Junior from Hoboken NJ as he drove around campus looking for a space before his 10:15 Strategies of Youth Ministry class. “But this makes me want to move back into Hughes Hall. Sure, it smelled like feces and Lysol, but at least I wasn’t pissing off my teachers by being late every day.”

“When they talk you into enrolling, the say that you will get to meet a bunch of other students,” stated Lisa Wicker, a new freshman from Boise ID. “What they don’t tell you is that you get to know them while all of you hike in to campus from the back side of North Cleveland COG.”

Speaking on condition of anonymity, one university professor told The Insurrectionist, “On the record, I can say that there is enough parking for everyone who needs it. Off the record, I can say that I was approached by some administration types who informed me I’d better get my wife to drop me off in front of the Administration building each morning. They said I hadn’t ‘Made the cut’ whatever the heck that’s supposed to mean.”

While parking may be hard to find, Students can take heart in the fact that the new monstrosity of a science building on Ocoee Street is not.

Developing…

With their sixth straight loss the Bowling Green Hot Rods fell eight games out of first place in the South Atlantic League Southern Division.  Check out the Hot Rods’ dwindling playoff hopes and other storylines in some Monday morning hot links:

• Tim Beckham extended his hitting streak to seven games, but Bowling Green lost 9-3 to Kannapolis.
• Toledo rallied to defeat the Bats 6-3 and win their eighth straight game.
• After defeating Greensboro 5-2, Lexington has won two straight following its 12-game losing streak.
• “Card Game” breaks down some UofL Baseball commitments including Asaad Ali, son of Muhammad Ali.
• The Chattanoogan reports that former UK pitcher Tyler Henry has transferred to Lee University.

While I was a student Lee University, I had the opportunity to photograph “Dorm Wars” two years in a row. Dorm Wars is a sort-of wacky Olympics put on by the office of housing and residential life. Each dorm competes against the others for some minor prizes, but mostly for bragging rights. This photo was taken during one of the shopping cart relay races (if that wasn’t already obvious).

The largest library fine I ever received was for $42 for late fees because I misplaced some video tapes during a move–oh, the shame.  Then I found out about this gentleman…

An Illinois handball coach returned a book that was over 145 years overdue!

“The leather-bound volume was taken from the shelves of the Washington and Lee University library in Lexington, Virginia on 11 June 1864 by a Union soldier when General David Hunter and his army of West Virginia raided the area. Passed down by the soldier, CS Gates, through generations of his family, it eventually came into the possession of Mike Dau, of Lake Forest, Illinois, from one of Gates’s descendents.”

Read the whole story here

The Rev’d Father Mitchell Baker, rector of Emmanuel Fellowship in Cleveland, Tennessee and Assistant Director for Degree Completion and CAPSOnline for Lee University, has graciously informed our diocese of two free theological education programs.  Both programs are available online through two well known and respected seminarys:  Covenant Theological Seminary and Gordan-Conwell Theological Seminary.  The programs are open to laity and clergy.  Links to the two programs are provided below.

Covenant Theological Seminary’s Worldwide Classroom

Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary’s Dimensions of Faith

To learn more about Lee University’s  Degree Completion programs and/or distance education opportunities, contact Father Mitch Baker at either 423.614.8371 or mbaker@leeuniversity.edu

About 15 years ago, I was starting my college experience at Lee University in Tennessee.  I started as a Music Major, but after a year decided on a different path.  I ended up studying psychology, the study of human behavior.  In developmental psychology, we were given the definition of growth.  To paraphrase, the definition of growth in developmental psychology was positive change over time.  The fact is that from birth, we are in a constant state of change.  Either it’s positive change (growth), or negative change (atrophy, death, deterioration).  Let’s embrace and strive towards positive change.  If you do not embrace and seek change, change will find you on it’s terms.

It is not necessary to change.  Survival is not mandatory.

~W. Edwards Deming

Cleveland, Tenn.

Despite touring with COG pastor Travis Johnson, Homestead Florida based band The Saturn Project, managed not to suck during a concert held at Lee University.

“It’s tough, you know?” the band stated in an interview after the show. “We’re a rock band, and we have to hang out with this dude? Have you seen his haircut?”

Despite the difficulty of traveling with someone so un-hip, the rocksters have been making waves in the music community as of late.

The ruckus is being caused by the bands decision not to profit from their stellar new album. Instead, the band is donating 100% of the profits of their new album, titled, “Anthems For A Broken World” to the non-profit ministry, People For Care and Learning.

The money from the album will go to build homes for 3rd world families in the country of Cambodia.

“We are amazed by what these young men are doing,” said PLC President, Fred Garmon. “From the very beginning, they have shown a true heart for ministry. What they are doing is going to change countless numbers of lives.”

The band has announced a week-long vacation to rest before heading to Nashville to re-record all of the vocals in Spanish in an attempt to reach an even broader audience.

“There are plenty of bands out there who make music for money,” said lead singer Jesse Santoyo. “We don’t want to get boxed in by any labels. We are interested in people seeing Christ through our art.”

So far, record sales are impressive, and that’s good news for the poor in Cambodia.

“Already, this band has raised enough money to build an entire community,” Garmon stated. “It’s unbelieveable.”

With touring and recording in the works, the future certainly looks bright for The Saturn Project. The same cannot be said for Johnson’s hair.

To check out The Saturn Project and  to learn more about the new album and how you can help, check out any of the following links:

http://www.myspace.com/thesaturnproject

http://peopleforcare.org

Or, if you absolutely have no other choice, http://travisjohnson.net/

Developing…

Lee University successfully hosted a variety of events in celebration of Martin Luther King, Jr., Day.  Dr. Michael Laney, who coordinated many of the events, was very pleased with the outcome of the celebrations.  The celebration was community based and extended beyond the Lee University family, including and off campus keynote speaker, Ms. Rae Lewis Thornton, who is an HIV/AIDS activist.

Additionally, the “Dream Keepers Award” was presented to African American middle school and high school students who had at least a 3.0.  UMOJA performed at the presentation, and the Harlem Gospel Choir sang that evening.  Tied into these festivities was the Inaugural Reception, which was hosted by Dr. Murl Dirksen.