Is there a limit to your generosity this season? This may seem the far horizon of giving, but it really isn’t as dramatic as you might have thought (or as dramatic as it once was).

Have you considered volunteering and signing up for the registry as a Bone Marrow Donor?

Thousands of patients with Leukemia and other life-threatening diseases depend upon donors on the Be The Match Registry (The National Marrow Donor Program) for transplants that will save their lives. You never know for whom you might be an appropriate match, so your profile is stored in the registry. When a patient is ready for and truly needs the procedure, their doctor searches for matches through the system. It needn’t be a huge procedure for you as the donor–the science has progressed so most transplant marrow can be received from a simple needle in your arm. It doesn’t have to be a punch into the bone of your pelvis like it used to be. Far less invasive, and it saves lives.

When you sign up, you are committing to helping anyone for whom you are a match. You can always change your mind when the time comes, perhaps many years from now when you match up with someone, but you won’t.

Did I mention it saves lives?

Even now, most red-blooded men wouldn't mind having Catherine Deneuve under their tree.

(IFC) Catherine Deneuve, Matthieu Amalric, Melvil Poupaud, Chiara Mastroianni, Jean-Paul Roussillon, Anne Consigny, Hippolyte Girardot, Emmanuelle Devos, Emile Berling, Laurent Capelluto. Directed by Arnaud Desplechin

Christmas is a time for families to gather, no matter the distance. Sometimes the distance isn’t just physical and geographical, it’s emotional as well.

Junon (Deneuve) and Abel (Roussillon) Vuillard are the parents of three adult children: Elizabeth (Consigny), a neurotic playwright, Henri (Amalric) the charming but destructive black sheep and Ivan (Poupaud), the peacemaker between the children. After a disastrous business venture five years prior, Henri who had misappropriated funds from the theater he co-owned was bailed out by Elizabeth on the condition that she never have anything to do with him again and that he be banished from any family event that she was also attending.

Junon and Abel also had a fourth child, Joseph, who would have been the eldest but had died in childhood of leukemia. Now, Junon has developed it and the children and grandchildren (including Paul (Berling), son of Elizabeth who has mental problems) are being tested for compatibility to donate bone marrow for a transfusion.

Because it is Christmas, the decision is for the children to come to the Paris home they grew up in and so they do, families in tow; Henri’s flamboyant girlfriend Faunia (Devos), Ivan’s beautiful wife Sylvia (Mastroianni), Elizabeth’s mathematician husband Claude (Girardot) and cousin Simon (Capelluto), a lovesick tortured artist (sounds like the name of a band to me).

Spending time in closed quarters begins to force the family to deal with the tensions and feelings that have been dormant due to distance. The family dynamics begin to distend, change and convulse under the weight of Junon’s illness, the always-present specter of Joseph hovering sorrowfully above the family table and the family politics that create enemies out of brother and sister.

I’m deliberately trying to reveal as little of the plot as I can. One of the things that works about the film is the little subplots and interrelationships that are only seen as threads of the tapestry, but in the final couple of scenes it’s as if the camera pulls back and the tapestry is finally seen as a whole.

None of these characters are perfect and few of them are even likable. Junon is not the best of mothers, playing favorites with her children but loving none of them as much as she loves herself. Deneuve is still radiantly beautiful at age 66 and as elegant as she has ever been. Her Junon seems an improbable match with the more gnome-like Abel, but there is a certain amount of affection between them.

Amalric is one of my favorite French actors today, and anyone who saw him in The Diving Bell and the Butterfly is likely to agree (he also played the villain in Quantum of Solace and was one of the best things about it). His Henri is fully aware of his familial role as an absolute jerk and has embraced it, but not without cost. Few actors in France can hold their own with Deneuve but Amalric is one of them and he does here.

One of the more interesting asides of the movie is the casting of Mastroianni as Sylvia. If the name sounds familiar, it should be; she’s the daughter of Italian actor Marcello Mastroianni and…Catherine Deneuve. The facial resemblance to her mother is marked; I think the casting is meant to imply that Ivan married a girl who not only was much like his mother emotionally but also facially as well which is a little bit creepy but there is a certain delicious irony to it.

At times the squabbling and some of the family skeletons seem a little bit too forced and that takes away from the film’s realism. What I like about the movie is that the characters are very human and far from perfect; this is a family that has issues, a whole lot of them as a matter of fact. As I said earlier, some of the main characters aren’t even that likable but every last one of them is compelling. Other critics have said that they have uncovered further subtleties upon repeated viewing of the movie; I haven’t had a chance to do that yet but I suspect I’ll have the same reaction.

If you’re expecting a Hollywood feel-good family Christmas movie, you’re going to open up a big box of disappointment. If you want to feel good without being manipulated, this is going to be more your speed. I wound up with a warm, Christmas feeling that was so genuine that I didn’t let go of it for days. Christmas isn’t about the perfect family; it’s about the family we actually do have, warts and all. The Vuillards aren’t always lovable but there is love and it is real. That’s the Christmas we may not generally wish for but it’s the one we usually get and to be honest, the one we usually remember with the most fondness.

WHY RENT THIS: The themes of redemption and forgiveness are particularly heartwarming given the seasonal tale. Deneuve is captivating and still absolutely gorgeous.

WHY RENT SOMETHING ELSE: The squabbling and family dynamics sometimes seem a little bit more over the top than real.

FAMILY VALUES: Some sexuality, foul language and lots and lots of smoking – hey, they’re French.

TRIVIAL PURSUIT: Desplechin has been nominated for eight Cesar Awards (the French equivalent of the Oscar) and four Golden Palms (a prestigious award handed out at the Cannes Film Festival) but has yet to win either.

NOTABLE DVD EXTRAS: The DVD and Blu-Ray are available as a part of the prestigious Criterion Collection. They contain a copy of Desplechin’s one hour documentary L’Aimee which is about the selling of his childhood home and directly prefaces the tone of A Christmas Tale. There is also a booklet containing an essay from critic Phillip Lopate about the film and its impact.

FINAL RATING: 7/10

TOMORROW: The Holly and The Quill continues.

Sunday we celbrated the end of Joshua’s chemotherapy. For 3 1/2 years we have eaten at Chick-fil-a at least once a week. But every time we were there, we had to tell Joshua, “I’m sorry. You can’t play in the playground. The doctors know you could get sick too easily because of the medicine you take.”

But on Sunday, that all changed. The owner of the restaurant opened up the doors on Sunday to allow us to celebrate Joshua’s last chemo pill. Alongside Joshua’s best buddies and some of the amazing people who have supported us over these 3 difficult years, we counted down Joshua’s last five pills. He swallowed them like a pro and had a piece of cake as big as his face. As you can see from the video below, he’s still coming down from the sugar high.

Wow. That’s a milestone.

All the Tea in China by Jane Orcutt

I’ve had this book on my shelf for well over a year now. When church was canceled because of the snow, I decided it was the perfect time to read it. And I’m so glad I did.

It truly grieves me to think that this writer will no longer pen her tales here on earth. Just before the book was published in 2007, the author died from a battle with leukemia. This must have been her last labor of love.

The story, told in first person (unusual for a historical romance), was rich with details that made the setting come alive for me.

Isabella Goodrich wants to find her calling in life. After meeting a missionary from China, she believes she has found it. Her only hindrance is convincing the missionary to take her along with him.

What you’ll find in All the Tea in China:

A woman with a sword who knows how to use it

Privateers who underestimate the woman with the sword

A man who is not quite what he seems

Two people who find love most unexpectedly

Note: My favorite books to read are regencies. I’ve attempted to write one myself. I don’t come close to being in the same league as this writer. I wish she were around to write more of her stories.

Colloidal Silver – The Rediscovery of a Super Antibiotic?
Colloidal silver appears to be a powerful, natural antibiotic and preventative against infections.
How It Works
The presence of colloidal silver near a virus, fungus, bacterium or any other single celled pathogen disables its oxygen metabolism enzyme, its chemical lung, so to say. Within a few minutes, the pathogen suffocates and dies, and is cleared out of the body by the immune, lymphatic and elimination systems. Unlike pharmaceutical antibiotics, which destroy beneficial enzymes, colloidal silver leaves these tissue-cell enzymes intact, as they are radically different from the enzymes of primitive single-celled life. Thus colloidal silver is absolutely safe for humans, reptiles, plants and all multi-celled living matter.
Ingesting Colloidal Silver
Taken orally, the silver solution is absorbed from the mouth into the bloodstream, then transported quickly to the body cells. Swishing the solution under the tongue briefly before swallowing may result in faster absorption. In three to four days the silver may accumulate in the tissues sufficiently for benefits to begin. Colloidal silver is eliminated by the kidneys, lymph system and bowel after several weeks.
Chronic or Serious Conditions
1 teaspoon of 5 ppm. colloidal silver equals about 25 micrograms (mcg.) of silver. 1 – 4 teaspoons per day (25 – 100 mcg.) is generally considered to be a “nutritional amount” and is reported to be safe to use for extended periods of time. Amounts higher than this are generally considered “therapeutic amounts” and should only be used periodically.
In cases of illness, natural health practitioners have often recommended taking double or triple the “nutritional amount” for 30 to 45 days, then dropping down to a smaller maintenance dose. Amounts from 1 – 32 ounces per day have reportedly been used in acute conditions.
If your body is extremely ill or toxic, do not be in a hurry to clear up everything at once. If pathogens are killed off too quickly, the body’s five eliminatory channels (liver, kidneys, skin, lungs and bowel) may be temporarily overloaded, causing flu-like conditions, headache, extreme fatigue, dizziness, nausea or aching muscles. Ease off on the colloidal silver to a smaller amount and increase your distilled water intake. Regular bowel movements are a must in order to relieve the discomforts of detoxification. Resolve to reduce sugar and saturated fats from the diet, and exercise more. Given the opportunity, the body’s natural ability to heal may amaze you.
Topical Uses
Some have used colloidal silver in a nasal spray mister – to reach the sinuses and nasal passages. Spray bottles have been used for topical use on kitchen and bathroom surfaces, skin, sore throat, eyes, burns, etc. Colloidal silver is painless on cuts, abrasions, in open wounds, in the nostrils for a stuffy nose, and even in a baby’s eyes because, unlike some antiseptics, it does not destroy tissue cells. It’s excellent as an underarm deodorant, since most underarm odor is caused by bacteria breaking down substances released by the sweat glands!
Some Common Uses of Colloidal Silver
Natural health practitioners have for years recommended taking one tablespoon daily, for four days, to establish a level, then one teaspoon daily for maintenance (proportional to body weight for children). After six weeks, a pause of several weeks has also been recommended by some natural healing arts doctors. Also, colloidal silver can be applied directly to cuts, scrapes, and open sores, or on a bandage for warts. It can be applied on eczema, itches, acne or bug bites. To purify water, add one tablespoon per gallon, shake well and wait six minutes. Mixed this way, it’s tasteless. It is not an allopathic poison.
Veterinary and Garden Use
Colloidal silver has worked just as well on pets of all kinds. Used in proportion to body weight, it should bring the same results. In the garden, field or greenhouse, add enough to the water or soil – and the plants will do the rest.
Colloidal Silver in Advance of Illness?
When the possibility of germ exposure is higher, colloidal silver can be taken orally each day or applied topically when there is a skin problem. It’s like having a second defense system. The silver acts only as a catalyst and is stabilized. It is non-toxic, except to one-cell plants and animals, and is non-addicting. It also apparently kills parasites because they have a one cell egg stage in their reproductive cycle.
Older folks reportedly feel younger because their body energies are used for other uses than constantly fighting disease. Digestion has also been reportedly better. Medical research has shown that silver promotes more rapid healing, with less scar tissue, even in the case of severe burns. Successes have been reported in cases that previously have been given up by established doctors. Colloidal silver is tasteless and won’t sting even a baby’s eyes, and won’t upset your stomach.
More Than 650 Diseases Helped?
Colloidal silver has been reported to kill 650 micro-organisms, many of which are associated with human diseases. This does not automatically mean that taking colloidal silver will “cure” diseases “caused” by these germs. Colloidal silver only kills micro-organisms when they are in contact with it for a sufficient period of time.
The basic guideline that has been recommended for using colloidal silver is that it usually “works” if you can get a high enough concentration to the “affected area”. Some will want to experiment with “higher amounts” (such as 8 or more ounces at a time) to find out what it takes to accomplish this. Do not use colloidal silver if you are allergic to contact with silver metals, or if you notice any digestive upset after use.
The following is a partial list of the more than 650 diseases that colloidal silver has been reputed to be successful against: acne, AIDS (Reference 8), allergies, appendicitis, arthritis, athlete’s foot, bladder inflammation, blood parasites, blood poisoning, boils, burns, cancer (References 2, 4, 7), candida, cholera, colitis, conjunctivitis, cystitis, dermatitis, diabetes (Reference 1), dysentery, eczema, fibrositis, gastritis, gonorrhea, hay fever, herpes, impetigo, indigestion, keratitis, leprosy, leukemia, lupus, lymphangitis, Lyme disease, malaria, meningitis, neurasthenia, parasitic infections: viral, fungal and bacterial pneumonia, pleurisy, prostate, pruritus ani, psoriasis, purulent opthalmia, rhinitis, rheumatism, ringworm, scarlet fever, septic conditions of the eyes, ears, mouth, and throat, seborrhea, septicemia, shingles, skin cancer, staphylococcus and streptococcus infections, stomach flu, syphilis, thyroid, tuberculosis, tonsillitis, toxemia, trachoma, all forms of virus, warts, whooping cough, yeast infection, stomach ulcer, canine parovirus and other veterinary uses, and fungal and viral attacks on plants. Simply spray diluted silver on the leaves and add to the soil.
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Article from detox canada
http://www.detaxcanada.org/c%20silver.htm

Just letting those of you who have been praying for Don that he has been moved to intensive care today. The doctor is getting consults from the kidney and infectious disease doctors to get the fluid off his lungs. Pray for his comfort and peace through the night

I called the kids to come last night because he was in such pain and I needed them to help us through. He’s getting good care. We love him as I know you do. Please continue to pray.

It certainly has been a while since my last post, and for all those fiending for new material, I apologize. Some wild stuff has been going down in my life, and I been swept around, this way and that, and didn’t have the strength of will to sit down and write another post until my mind had settled somewhat. And so, without further ado, here’s that whirlwind. Medically, platelets have been big; namely their absence from my bloodstream. I’ve noted before this lack, which has been going on since late August, however these numbers never rebounded. My doctor told me maybe a month ago that he didn’t know why they weren’t coming back after such a long period, and that this was highly unusual, which made me feel special. I can’t really go back on Gleevec because then my platelet levels will completely evaporate, so the only other medical recourse is the bone marrow transplant, which I’ve been trying my best to avoid. The reason I’m trying to avoid it is that it puts me in the hospital for a month, and then I’ll be out of work for 6 months to a year. This would give me plenty of time to start writing that novel, but I had been hoping to move into the city soon. Speaking of which, that is another development. My friend Dave needs a roommate, and I applied for a webmaster position at the New York Film Academy, where he and my friends Andy, Meg and Jon work as well, and if I go for the transplant, I obviously can’t take the job if I get it. So not wanting all those bone marrow high jinks, I decided to go to a homeopathic doctor who had apparently given my mom medicine to jumpstart her fertility for both Laura and I (more information than I really wanted to know), and helped Laura overcome Lime disease. He turned out to be this really nice Indian man who gave me this herbal formula, and what do you know, my platelet levels came up! They had been hovering around the high single digits, but after two weeks on the formula, raised up to 20 thousand parts per million, high enough that I didn’t need a transfusion on my past visit. This was certainly celebration worthy, however in addition to my platelet levels rising, so did my cancer cells, putting me back in the bone marrow predicament. I’m going to the transplant doctor today, and she’ll give me the skinny on what the whole procedure will entail, and then it will be in my hands to make the decision. I’ll keep yall posted on what develops. Until then, adios!

Names

Names are powerful things. They reflect and perhaps dictate what you are or what you may become. Often, they are the only things we leave behind, carved into tombstones.

Name #1 

I was first named when I was just a reason my mother threw up all the time. She called me Bruce Gustov, sure her baby must be a male to cause her such grief. My father’s Finnish family had been naming the first-born son of each generation “Gustav” in tribute to King Gustav I of Sweden, or so the dubious family history proclaims, because he granted our family land in Finland in the 1500’s. But my mother balked at naming her son Gustav, so my elder brother was called Francis. If you’re going to abandoned a centuries-old tradition, you’d better have a good alternative. But Francis? It was after my uncle Francis, and fair enough, but a poorer choice of a boy’s name in 1940’s America could probably not be found. This was in the day of the popular movie star ”Francis the talking mule”.  It was like calling a child a braying ass. To compensate for this lapse of tradition, she agreed to name the second son (me) Gustav.

Name #2

Except I was a girl. I suspect I might have turned my outie into an innie in vitro when I heard a future ringing with schoolyard taunts of Brucey-Goosey and with a name like that I’d pretty much have to be gay which was complicated in the 50’s, so…”It’s a girl!” And so the tradition died when she named me after herself, Laurel Jean. Thank goodness. I could have been Gustavina.

Name #3

Looking into a Quantum Portal

As a little girl, my father would tell me inventive stories about the child who lived in the mirror whose life was exactly opposite of mine (an early lesson in quantum philosophy) My alternative reality name was Aurel Nean and she became another facet of my crystal. Today Aurel Nean is a wealthy slender jet-setter whose affair with George Clooney is the stuff of legend. She lives in a castle and has a houseful of children and grandchildren but never married. She looks about 30. Sigh.

Name #4

A family friend took one look at me and called me L.J. and that name stuck as a pet name used within my family my whole life.

Name #5

My name changed again in high school. I was friends with two other odd ducks. We had offensive nicknames for each other in keeping with girls being so sugar and spice and everything nice. Mine was W.B. LaRue which stood for “Water Buffalo” and the “LaRue” was because I lived on the corner of Early and LaRue streets. LaRue is French and means “the street” so I was named after The Street Street. How is it I didn’t end up homeless or a street-walker? To those two friends, “Elephante Bardass” and “Moose Cragin”, both girls by the way and pretty ones, I remained LaRue all the days of my life while they pretty much managed to live down their charming monikers.

Name #6

My first husband was called Mr. Early and so my name harkened back to that street corner. LaRue and Early. The street corner is still there but I am no longer Mrs. Early. An interesting sidebar to this is how eerily similar the data of my two husbands is.

Apart from these alarming similarities they couldn’t be more different. I think I had the right idea, I just missed the first time. I’ve never been very good with directions. They didn’t look similar though. Where #1 is bald #2 has a braid down his back. #2 is tall #1 not so tall. #1 smoked and played with drugs and alcohol #2 did not. #1 was a hippie #2 was a cop. And of course #1 I divorced, #2 I didn’t.

 Name #7

And so I became Mrs. Ennis and have remained so these almost 20 years so far. Both husbands called me Laurel though.

Name #8

When #2 and I were courting, a friend named me “Tender-Love” and we therefore became the saccharine “Tender-Love & Kerr”. And so one of my names is “Tender-Love”.

Name #9

My husband swears there is a force swirling around me. It causes clutter to centre around wherever I spend time. It causes my socks to somehow rotate so the heels end up on the top of my feet. I causes all the blankets on the bed to swirl around me. He has named my inner force. He calls it “Laureolis”.

Name #10

a token of his esteem

Another of my husband’s affectionate names for me is because of the way animals react to me. They love me. I think I got that gift when I was a small girl in Evansville, Indiana. We lived near a rural part of Indiana and our house abutted a peach orchard and a dense wood. My best friend was called Wally. He was 6 to my 5. He brought me presents as a token of his esteem. Toads mostly. Together we would wander the wood and the orchard, because children were safe then and raised free-range.

Deep into the vine dripping wood we found an abandoned log cabin that a settler built. No one else even knew it was there. It was our secret place. One day Wally showed me another secret. We sat on a log and he concentrated for a minute and suddenly animals came scampering toward us. There were raccoons, squirrels, mice, snakes, even a deer. They came and nuzzled him, the snakes twining around his ankles. They all moved happily around him unafraid, letting him pet them and not harming him in any way. It was a truly magical moment in my life. I gazed at him in awe and he just smiled. I think maybe being around Wally on that day in the early part of my life lent me a little bit of his truly astonishing connection with animals. So much so that one day a few years ago I was out in the garden when a baby crow who had a white feather on his tail landed on my shoulder and remained there for about ten minutes. He liked to nuzzle under my hair, probably enjoying the warmth. From that day on my husband called me “The mother of all living things”.

 And whatever happened to the magical boy-child of my youth, Wally, the little Dr. Doolittle? Did he become a vet, a zookeeper, an animal protection activist? His parents were a physician and a nurse both working in the field of leukemia research. Yes, Wally died of leukemia at age 7. Not long and not entirely of this world. I’m so grateful he spent some of his brief time with me showing me magical things in the secret vine dripping wood of my youth. Goodbye Wally, and thanks for all the toads.

1. Bruce Gustav
2. Laurel Jean
3. Aurel Neen
4. L.J.
5. W.B. LaRue
6. Mrs. Early
7. Mrs. Ennis
8. Tender-Love
9. Laureolis
10. The mother of all living things.

I am one step behind in our conversations with the kids about everything that is going on.

I have been so worried about talking to Tai about everything that I forgot how many things still need to be explained better to Luc.

Today, I finally decided to get Luc in the bathtub. This was the first extended naked time we were having since the port was pit in place. As I took his shirt off, DH’s mother, leaned in to examine. All this attention from us did nothing to ease any fears about the thing that has been hurting and hard under his skin.

In the bathtub, Luc always watches himself in the little circle drain cover. He got a glimpse of himself with the port and incision and panicked. Leaped into my arms and cried and cried. Very sad about all the things that are happening to him.

I should have been explaining the port to him all this time.

I also notice that I will talk about upcoming hospital visits, forgetting that, even though he cannot talk much, he understands far more than I can even imagine. Talk to toddlers!

today I said the word “medicine” and Luc threw up on cue.

I am glad that the chemo drugs seem to be working. but Luc has gone into hiding in his head. 23.75 hours a day, he is totally unresponsive to humor and happiness. he is tired, nauseous, drugged up, and perhaps even has some post traumatic stress issues. I hope he is able to use some energy to heal and that the exhaustion isn’t just because he needs a blood transfusion.

in any case, we have managed to get the pepcid, dexamethasome and septra down. not so much luck with the antifungal stuff or even the antinausea medicine.

as an infant, luc was very sensitive to tastes and textures. he never ate baby food because it made him gag. however, as much as he dislikes the taste, we have found that mixing the dexamethasome with chocolate syrup completely stopped the gagging. also, getting the syringe in his mouth and holding it still so that he eventually puts his lips on it to suck also helps – as opposed to just squirting it in as soon as his mouth opens. this may se obvious, but the process involves holding him down and a world class
struggle on his part.

“Our Father…

It seems that those words have taken on new meaning for me in the past 3 and a half years. In those 3 years, I have done the best I could to care for my son. Through sickness and hair loss. Through crying nights and days of questions. And for much of the time, I have felt myself hanging on by a thread.

But You? You know so much better than I do what it means to watch your Boy suffer. And because You do, I believe You have poured Your grace and mercy upon us. That grace has been far more profound than just the ability to get through the day, though You have been continuously faithful for doing that.

The fact that we are still here – all of us – is a testimony to your persevering power.

But You have gone beyond giving us our daily bread. You have sat with us in quiet rooms. You have rocked with us in hard-back chairs. You have cried with us as we have seen friends leave this world and go to be with You. You have lifted us up and born us on your strong back.

Over and over again, You have proven Yourself to be abundantly, exceedingly, and wonderfully able.

I think this morning of what our son’s name means: The Lord is Salvation. And the truth of that statement is starting to seep in. You have saved, are saving, and will continue to save us. And through these troubles, amazingly, we have become more convinced of Your love in Christ – from which we will never be separated – in us.

We have believed, and yet you have helped our unbelief. I confess at times I have accused You of sleeping in the boat while the wind and the waves raged around us, but I know deep in my heart that You do not slumber or sleep. You have been ever watchful, ever mindful, and ever good.

Thank You, Father, for keeping us in faith. For prospering us and not harming us. For giving us hope and a future.

And now, will You, by Your grace, continue to uphold our family as we move forward. Help us not to forget Your faithfulness. May the remaining decades of our lives ring with the stories of Your goodness. I pray that our little boy would become convinced of Your good work in His life, and that we might faithfully be a comfort to others with the comfort we have received from You.

May it be done for the glory of Your own suffering Son who now sits victoriously, interceding for us even at this very moment.

Amen.”

**Today is the last day of intravenous chemotherapy for Joshua, 3 and a half years after his diagnosis of leukemia. After his treatment today, he will take his pills for 5 more days. The last pill is Sunday.

This post is all about surrender.

Today is December 13, 2009. We are on our 15th day at Hippocrates Health Institute.

Today I am realizing that everything needs to happen in its own time. A body cannot be forced to do something it’s not ready to do, even deep cleansing. It has it’s own intelligence which must be honored. I also realize that my body responds differently than Dominic’s body to everything! I will now apply that bit of wisdom to my future encounters. We are all so unique and different and what works for one may not work for all.

I had way too much ego when I came here. I see that now. I came here thinking I was going to save the day (along with Brian Clement). I have been so humbled by this experience. As the 2 weeks have progressed, I’ve seen Dominic get weaker and sicker. He can’t keep the green juice down, nor really anything for that matter except for his morning and evening wheatgrass shots. Last night and this morning though, not even those are passing his pale little lips. He sleeps most of the day. He takes morphine, sometimes 2 times a day for the pain in his leg and hip where the leukemia seems to be growing. I’ve talked to so many wise and loving people like Brian and Anna Marie Clement, Viktorus Kulvinskas, Dr. Thomas Lodi, and the list goes on and on. There are many things we can try, and many things we are actually doing at the moment. And there are more things we will surely do.

There have been so many beautiful people who have sent me gifts of superfoods such as Barley Max (thank you Raw Truck Driver Dave and friends), and Blue green algae, a BEMER, and more, more, more! Thank you everyone. It is the love, compassion and thoughtfulness which is doing the most healing of all. The financial donations have continued to pour in, and I am so very grateful to all of you who have rushed to our aid to help in Dominic’s healing. A BEMER was overnight FED EX’d to us on Saturday which is a bio-energetic mat that will help boost Dominc’s immune system and balance his energy, and, according to the literature, a lot more. All the love, prayers and well wishes are uplifting my spirits on a daily basis. For this energy healing I am eternally grateful!!!

Dominic’s Dad and Step Mom are here visiting this weekend for the second time since our stay here. It is wonderful to have them here. Without their physical and emotional support I don’t know how I would be getting through all of this. Dominic loves his dad so much and always perks up when he is around so it is a healing just to have him here.

Tuesday December 15th

So here we are 17 days after arriving, when I thought Dominic would be getting  a lot better. I had this idea that he would come here and start eating all the food, drinking the juices, doing the therapies, and poof!, transform into his old, healthy self. This has not happened yet. In fact, because he is still so weak, we feel it is best to come back home now so he can be closer to friends and loved ones in his own surroundings. So, today we are flying home.

I choose to surrender with my entire being. Surrender to the fact that I don’t know the grand design. Surrender to the best possible outcome for all involved.  Surrender to Dominic’s internal intelligence and his soul’s knowing. Surrender to letting go of thinking I know how things should go. In essence, I surrender to the Highest Power.

We have been up, we have been down, we feel wrung out like wet dish towels and hung to dry. But our spirits are still high and we are still hopeful that a miracle could happen at any moment.  Dominic is in good spirits today and told me this morning that he knows he’s going to get better. As always, we are hopeful. The trip home is tonight at 7:30. His step mom booked us the first row on Jet Blue, and I pray that we can get home with Dominic being as comfortable as possible and that it is an effortless and easy flight. We need to use a wheelchair as Dominic is too weak to walk anywhere or even stand for that matter.

Again, thank you all so much for your love and prayers. I’ve never experienced anything like this in my life! There has been a worldwide circulation of Dominic’s story, and I’ve been contacted by people in Japan, Australia, New Zealand, Costa Rica and the world over. The love is circling the globe. Cherie Soria and Dan Ladderman of Living Light Culinary Arts Institute have been instrumental in raising funds for us. I am exceptionally grateful for their help and continued support. This is a true story of love, hope and compassion in the highest form.

I love you all!!!!!