Our bathroom wall – picture taken from ‘the throne’ (with the lid closed, of course!).

I don’t know why, but my awesome Mom let me write on my walls when I was a teenager. I painted this huge quote by Tennyson above my bed, and all sorts of other quotations beside my bed. I reflected on those words a lot over the years, as I lay there, debating if I should get up or not.

I usually made it to school hastily dressed in my jogging pants, plaid shirt and pony tail – just in time for the bell. I didn’t waste time “preparing” for school. I could run there in about 2 minutes from my house, so I didn’t have to work too hard to get there.

The point is, the words were more important to me. They were the preparation for my thinking for the day. Who cares about clothes; words are the thing.

Now, we have a word wall in our main floor bathroom. I started it because I figured both the children and I could benefit from some regular ‘great thoughts’ in that reflective place.

I’m really not sure how I’m going to contain this love I have for spraying inspiration onto the walls. It does lead to some awkward parenting moments like this:

Tucker: Mommy, can I draw on the wall?

Mommy: No.

Tucker: Aw. But you do!

Uh… oh yeah.

I’m still working on that one, but for now at least the chalkboard wall in the kitchen satisfies some of that craving! Too bad for logical kids

It took six years for me to learn but familiarity does indeed breed contempt.

And indeed they are riddled with it.

- Lucid

The more things change, the more they stay the same. So break the glass ceiling.

- Lucidism

1) Find your own wand:
A wizard, before diving into a world of magic, needs to find his own wand to evoke energy. The more powerful his energy is, the more powerful would be his spell. Likewise, before you bustle your way into this helter-skelter society, you first find your own thoughts and resolute your actions. That’s your wand. And similar to the previous contour: the sturdier your thoughts are, the more overt your impact would be. But the question is: Do we choose our thoughts or they choose us? Its for you to think!

2) Sorting Hat:
Remember that infallible hat; sorting young wizards at Hogwarts. God! I wish we’ve it at our schools and colleges. But why I say so: People having similar personality (by similar personality I mean how they process thoughts and behave in certain manner in different circumstances) should be brought and grown together as a team assiduously. Doing so, would ensure a confident and strong environment for learning. We learn by various methods. Some learn by reading, some by writing and others by listening. If we are able to distinguish each type (which is, no doubt, an onerous task with young flittering minds) then we can form a community where everyone’s talent can be acknowledged and may be, there is more harmony in such a structure.

3) Invisibility cloak:
Gifted by a father to his son, Harry Potter. He used it either as a shield in dire situations or to get cognizance on something obnubilate. In a quandry everybody needs an invisibility cloak to umber any kind of attenuation. By now, you might be thinking what or who could be my “invisibility cloak”. I say: your face. Yes! your face, your expressions, as they can outdo any imminent maim. And till the time you’re not ready to take on, you can fake it rather than withdrawing.

4) The Mirror:
“It shows nothing more or less than the deepest and most desperate desires of our heart. It gives you neither knowledge or truth. Men have wasted away in front of it. Even gone mad” Prof. Dumbledore told  Harry Potter. “The Mirror” as I named it, in real life could be our big dreams or high expectations. I’m not at all suggesting having high standards is abject but don’t let them hamper your short-term milestones.

5) Expecto Patronum:
A powerful charm to counter Dementors, the foulest creatures that walk this earth. They glory in decay and despair, they drain peace, and hope out of the air around them. We too, face dementors in our real lives (known as goons). To outgun them, like Harry did, we need to invoke a staunch memory from our past. Meaning: whenever one is shrouded by dejection and pessimism, he should focus on good things that happened to him and be awesome instead.

6) Pensieve: To connect dots between what happened, what’s happening and what can happen, Dumbledore usually siphons decisive memory from his mind and pour it into Pensieve (a basin). Similarly, on being rebuffed in a critical situation, instead of hunkering himself, one should try writing the new experience in his annals for future prudence.

7) Horcrux: Voldemort, hid a fragment of his soul in objects to attain immortality. In real world, immortality comes from materialistic things, for say: money. Thus, instead of stockpiling all your money in one bucket, you should consider investments to avoid any beset.

Imagination is not only the uniquely human capacity to envision that which is not, and therefore the fount of all invention and innovation. In its arguably most transformative and revelatory capacity, it is the power to that enables us to empathize with humans whose experiences we have never shared. -  J.K. Rowling

Children come into the world intensely motivated to learn about the physical, social, and cultural world around them; but they need freedom in order to pursue that motive. For their first four or five years of life we generally grant them that freedom. During those first few years, without any teaching, they learn a large portion of what any human being ever learns. They learn their entire native language, from scratch. They learn the basic practical principles of physics. They learn psychology to such a degree that they become experts in how to please, annoy, manipulate, and charm the other people in their environment. They acquire a huge store of factual knowledge. They learn how to operate the gadgets that they are allowed to operate, even those that seem extraordinarily complex to us adults.

They do all this on their own initiative, with essentially no direction from adults. In fact adults can’t stop children from learning all this, unless they shut them away in closets. It is not just a few special “geniuses” or uniquely self-motivated children who do this; all children do it, except a very few who have real brain damage.

But then, at school age, we do the equivalent of shutting children into closets. We force them into settings called “schools” where we deprive them of their natural ways of learning, so they can’t learn much on their own, and there we give teachers the task of “teaching” them. So, of course, in those settings whatever the child manages to learn is very much affected by the teacher. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you force children into settings where they can’t learn on their own, then learning is necessarily dependent on teaching.

Children learn wonderfully without anyone systematically or deliberately teaching them, but yet, we adults do have, or should have, the responsibility of providing the conditions that allow children to take charge of their own learning. Real educational reform, in my view, is reform that provides those conditions.

The most important condition is freedom… [Read the rest here.]

Upon waking up, I should have realized it was one of *those* days when I hectically put all my clothes on backwards. Minus the bra, mind you, which would have been very difficult to put on backwards even if I’d wanted to; I was mildly comforted that at least I still have some semblance of mental alertness, however small.

Our piano teacher arrived a half an hour early and I was still in my pajamas, hence the need for the rush. I’d been idling in bed, because I knew the big kids were already about their productive business, and I’d just been nursing a head cold through the night. The little kids were uncharacteristically sleeping in, so I thought I’d seize the moment and pray my way into the morning from my pillow in spite of the fog in my head.

The children have been sick for the last two-ish weeks: first one, then another, and on down the line. The sickness itself hasn’t been too brutal – head colds and a few mild fevers – but, WOW, are attitudes ever crashing. I don’t think anyone is sick anymore, but the emotional fallout continues to be painful.

It’s also possible that I am trying to do too much in spite of compromised kids… but, life doesn’t stop just because noses are leaking! Mother has to keep the ball rolling! That’s why, in spite of crankiness, I had to make 10 loaves of bread yesterday.

Books or Bread
In light of some shifts we are working on making on the home front, we are asserting some significant changes in the areas of financial stewardship and family economics that are long overdue. The shift is painful for me (I hate even thinking about financial stuff – it’s one of those places I don’t want to go!), but I know that God is very clear about stewarding our resources from a Kingdom mindset, and so, I am determined not be lazy in this regard any more.

Reclaiming the frugal mindset I owned more wholly in our student days, I have been working through ways to get more creative with my budget, because really, I need to carve out some space for books.

One of the things I did a lot in the early years was make our own bread. (After some attempts at going gluten free for a while, I have sauntered back into bread territory and yesterday felt like I was ready to start making my own again.)

I had about three kids helping me mix and knead the hugest amount of dough I have ever attempted. We divided it up into raison bread, onion bread, oatmeal bread and rolls, and boy, was it ever fun! The chaos was profound, but the result was worth it.

I felt like I’d stepped back in time.

Bread baking was a skill I laboriously learned early on in our marriage, and yesterday, hands covered in flour, I felt overcome with the delight of the memories of those difficult days. Two little kids, a student husband, and a head full of uncertainty on the new road called Motherhood were enough to keep me frequently overwhelmed with the duties of life.

Growth
Looking back, I think those days were glorious.

I felt I was in too deep every day! I felt I was always at the end of myself, always struggling to be more patient, more gentle, more smart, more… everything.

Interestingly, I am still in too deep now, though my circumstances are different.

Over time though, I have developed a desire to always be operating at the edge of myself, not settling into grooves of comfort, but constantly honing and learning and changing and responding to new challenges. Now, I see the “in too deep” aspect of life as a wonderful blessing, because it forces me to grow.

Leadership guy John Maxwell noted in his book that if you’re at the top of your class, you’re in the wrong class. If a person is seeking to develop and grow she must always be seeking to learn from others who are ahead of her in all areas of life.

I love this idea.

The goal is never to ‘be the best’, to be the ‘top of the class’. The goal is to grow – always grow – always learn from others – always dive into new challenges.

So, though there may be consequences to growth, like putting your clothes on backwards, or having to clean an exploded kitchen-bakery for two hours before bed, I believe they are worth the investment.

Bring it on!

If life were a spectrum, with the sinful lifestyles, messy cultural lies and mass groupthink sludge on the extreme left and God in His holiness on the extreme right, where do you suppose you’d sit on the continuum?

I think for most of my life I’ve assumed that I rested comfortably in the middle, not so worldly that I was too messed up, yet not so holy that I’d look super weird either. Something about the balance seemed to be reasonable, and I’ve sat right in that lukewarm puddle for most of my life.

And God hates lukewarm: He says He will spit it out.

Yikes.

All this time I’ve been looking back to the world, orienting my perspective towards the left-hand side of the scale, and patting myself of the back for being better and cleaner than all that mess. Doing that plants my vision solidly on the world, and plants the seeds of pride solidly in my heart.

However, if I completely turned, and began only orienting myself towards God and moving towards Him on the right, I would quickly see how my ‘good’ standards are in fact shabby rags compared to His goodness and holiness and righteousness. If I had my eyes only on Him, how my life would change – how truly radical it would be.

Face-Off
Part of what has encouraged me to be so wrongly oriented is the fact that our culture applauds causes and action. I have eagerly taken up all sorts of social justice causes, lifestyle changes, and ‘good works’ in the name of bettering myself and the world around me. This stuff all looks good, and is good to a degree.

But, the fact is that even good busyness doesn’t produce the righteousness that God desires.

Transformed character does.

We have come to a face-off between causes and character, and for me, causes have often won out. It’s so much easier to keep sacrificing, keep serving, keep working, and adjusting, and shifting, and changing all in the name of good, wholesome charity and meaningful activity that we can easily neglect responding to the areas in our life where God really desires to work.

The content of our heart, and where it dwells in relation to God’s truth, is the most essential element in determining a) our ‘success’ in life, b) the depth of our relationships, and c) the significance of our impact in the world.

We can keep shoving out prayer, Scripture reading, and obedient action in the name of doing good work, but we will always lose. If we are not continually conforming to God’s ways instead of trying to better the world with our petty plans and tasks and attempts at good behavior, I believe we will fall staggeringly short of the good we could have done if we’d taken the time to seek a transformed heart and make corresponding life changes.

That Fearful Place
For me, the question has become: where don’t I want to go?

Captured in that question are clues to where my heart has not yet surrendered to God, where I have happily accepted lukewarm-ness tempered by the world’s perspective and am really resisting the under-ground heart-work that God is quietly hinting needs to be resolved.

This discomfort is an indication that I am more oriented to the world’s outlook on a subject, than God’s. Busyness tends to help me forget about certain subjects that I’d rather not deal with in my life. However, as long as I reject God’s promptings in various areas of my life my character stalls out, even if I am productively busy doing other good things.

I’ve had to wrestle out all sorts of issues that earlier on, I would rather have ignored, as the obedience required was often way beyond my comfort zone: unresolved relationships, how to educate our children, our approach to building a family, our expression of our faith, to name but a few.

The thing is, as one area of life gets mildly sorted out in my heart I begin to see the gaps in the other areas of my life. There are many places I still fear to go, places I’d rather ignore. But, I’m convinced that those are the very places I need to go, the places I need to resolve and get right before God.

Continual heart/spiritual discomfort in an area indicates I am still not as conformed to God’s way as He is asking me to be. Better to be uncomfortable with the world, while striding towards God than slipping into the relativistic abyss that will only ever keep stripping away my soul. I am determined not to let fear affect my commitment to surrender to God in obedience.

Oh, God, change me!

The more I seek God, the more eccentric I’ll look to the world, but I believe accepting this call is the road to real transformation and real life.

I want to live for real.

They didn’t match my heels, and I had somewhere to be.

A few friends and I had to tickets to see Wicked in Fort Lauderdale, and while we’re there why not stop by Las Olas first?

It’s a beautiful place to get lost and wander among the unique eateries and art studios…so that’s exactly what we did.
While we were browsing around I found an amazingly gigantic sculpture of a water buffalo for about 25 grand, but in the end I settled for a beer and some chocolate covered Oreos.

Then it was time for the show!

It was Awesome!! (Of course) Something about seeing something done That well right in front of you is energizing and amazing in a way that a movie can never be.

And I will have that music stuck in my head for months, which is good because I needed new stuff in there besides the Les Miserables that’s been on loop since December.

When I got home all my crap was still there waiting for me, but I had a nice little tune to whistle while I worked through it all.

Crappy things are crappy whether you’re crappy or happy, so you might as well try!

And it was so worth it.

Only Child contemplates the trust issue

The wariness/trust issue took a different turn this weekend. I need to rethink my attitude here because guess what? I got betrayed.

For the winter I had hired someone to shovel the snow when more than just a few centimetres landed. Last Thursday evening into Friday, Toronto and other southern Ontario regions got blasted with a blizzard – 30 centimetres plus of snow. The fellow who was supposed to shovel the snow showed up twice to do it and afterwards made two points of knocking on my door promising to finish the rest – first he was going to shovel first thing the next morning. Of course he didn’t. He showed up early afternoon and said he would be back after lunch to do it and for me to just leave it for him to do – he’d be back in a couple of hours. He also made a point of all the seniors he shovelled snow for and that he couldn’t let them down.

If I’d have waited, I’d still be waiting. After five hours I went out there and hacked away at the snow still in the driveway, sidewalk and by two sides of the house. Sunday I was out there trying to remove the pile-up left at the end of the driveway (the sidewalk plough had removed some overnight) and the snow (layer by layer) over the two cache basins (but not the road spanning out from them). Then I went inside and phoned the 311 number for the City of Toronto and complained about the snow plough dumping the snow over the cache basins.

As for my “trusty” snow shoveller, because I prepaid for some of the weekend’s shovelling (I know; shouldn’t do this) he owes me at least half price for another snow shovelling job. Forecast is for a fair bit of snow here in a week. If he shows up I’ll get my half price deal and then I’m going to fire him with a lecture.

I also now know where he lives so am debating whether to bang on his door.

In the “good old days” when I was a child (back in the grey ages), my dad shovelled the snow and after he died Mom did the job until we moved into an apartment. As most of you know, I’m an “only person” here, so those two words are my key.

People have to earn my trust. Some close family and friends have, but some friends have messed up the trust issue as I’ve blogged before. Some clients also can be trusted. But for others – I will put on my journalism hat and be wary.

Unfortunately, as my late mother-in-law used to say, “that is the way of the world.”

On a lighter note, I will be taking my mystery short story collection Beyond the Tripping Point (Blue Denim Press, 2012) to the Runnymede Branch of the Toronto Public Library this evening to do a presentation and reading featuring my eccentric characters and quirky plots. At least here I have some control over what happens – the ones doing wrong get their just desserts in some way. For those in the Toronto area, my reading presentation starts      at 6.30 p.m. and the address is 2178 Bloor St. West, Toronto. More info on my Beyond the Tripping Point web page http://www.samcraw.com/Articles/BeyondtheTrippingPoint.html

And you can see and hear me read one of these stories, “The Body in the Trunk” at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pgOKYgBfAwY&feature=youtu.be

Cheers.

Sharon A. Crawford

Only Child Writes

Karma? Stupidity? Both? Either way I’ve been quite sick since last week’s grand impromptu adventure, eventually admitting defeat and taking two days off work.

Finally it was suggested I stop infesting the house and get some sun and salt air to work on this snot factory. So I schlepped over to the beach to snore loudly and annoy vacationing Canadians as opposed to my roomates.

While walking along the waves to find a spot, my clever car keys found the one hole in my couture beach bag (a la Walmart) and are probably decorating a mermaid grotto somewhere right now.

I figured all this would, if nothing else, make a decent story. And then they called to tell me Grandpap had passed away.

It’s days like this that you find out how good of friends you’ve got. And mine are good. Very good.

A quote on our bathroom wall. The best place to meditate on great thoughts!

There is power in the tongue: words can heal or destroy, uplift or break down. Isn’t it amazing that the power to bless and curse lies in the movements of that little flapper inside our mouths? Words (spoken or written) have power to inspire righteousness or slander carelessly.

Wrestling with words is a regular, daily part of my life. Some thoughtful comments on my last post got me thinking about the tender line we walk when we communicate about our lives and beliefs.

We live in a very liberal, status quo, politically correct time, where those who have opposing viewpoints to what is currently mainstream can easily be bullied into silence. Silence is a place where I have dwelled for a mighty long time, because, as I have mentioned before, I do not like rocking boats. I do not like conflict, I do not like appearing judgmental, I do not like to make people feel uncomfortable, and probably even more than all that, I don’t like personal criticism or disagreement. I am a wonderful product of years of publicly funded, politically correct education: peer pressure has gripped me to a shameful degree. And, when adding personal pride to the mix, I am one whopping parcel of insecurity!

So, as I mentioned yesterday, a while ago, I made a commitment to no longer living in fear. And speaking up/writing about my personal journey has become part of my choice to ‘live out loud’ instead of in silence out of fear.

Living Outside of Fear
As Ben and I have been, one-at-a-time, stepping out of the boxes that our social controllers would like to pack us in, our choices and beliefs have become more ‘public’. Thus, deeply personal, intimate convictions get ‘put on display’ in a way that is hard to cover up: you can’t exactly hide seven kids. Faking sending your kids to school when they’re still in their pajamas at 10 a.m. on a Tuesday and a delivery person drops by, prompting a curious question or two, doesn’t exactly work. Not showing up at a church service on a Sunday morning; drinking raw milk; having babies at home; not using birth control; not using volumes of curriculum; declining organized sports; limiting certain kinds of technology; encouraging your kids to work, instead of being bothered by their boredom… this random list of things gets more and more difficult to hide the more our family grows, and the more we live ‘out loud’.

Living In Tension
That fact is… we are flying by the seat of our pants here. Ben and I are figuring this stuff out on a minute by minute basis, seeking wisdom with each passing hour of the day. We don’t have the time (or the desire!) to sit around critiquing other people’s choices or judging their lives – we’re too busy trying to sort out all the loose ends that litter our own! We have not ‘arrived’ at all the answers. In fact, if anything, we feel more ‘undone’ than ‘done’ these days. With each new risk, each new step of obedience to God’s call on our lives we feel – acutely – how far we have to go in really living out the values and beliefs that we hold. We live, constantly, in the tension between shedding our ‘old’ man and embracing our ‘new’ man who is but a pilgrim on this earth. What makes the whole process so much more difficult is that God’s Kingdom ways tend not to be intuitive or ‘responsible’ to the eyes of the world, so we struggle under that tension as well!

The Unproductive Land of Silence
However, if any of us waited until we had every perspective, belief and opinion finely honed, perfected, and resolved, we would never speak. If we waited for ‘arrival’ before we engaged discussions, debates and conversations about our choices then we would never bother talking. Heaven is the place of ultimate resolution; down here, we’re stuck with good old-fashioned muck to wade through!

I don’t believe that any of us are called to silence – to hide our light under a bushel. Sharing our journeys, our stories, and discoveries not only testifies to the movement of our own lives, but creates opportunities to challenge, encourage, and hone each other. This sharing of life and thoughts together, I believe, is at the heart of deeper relational fellowship and intimacy.

If we abide side by side in silence, out of fear, we will never really know each other, and, I believe, we will not grow.

Wrestling Together
Here’s an opinion: in our culture, disagreement is framed as hatred. If you don’t agree with my position, you must not like me; therefore, you must hate me. Hatred is bad; therefore, your opinion must be repressed or changed so that we can be in perfect agreement. Our culture enforces the façade of agreement, but lacks real love. Where, conversely, allowing people the freedom to disagree is at the heart of real love – the ultimate expression of relational humility is recognizing that we can never change another person, and loving them anyway!

Questions
Asking questions is one of the ways we can embrace each other in love. Questions have the ability to shake us out of our safety and encourage us to examine why we do, or believe, a thing.

When I hold too many sacred cows, my arms get tired and my life becomes a wearisome exercise of clinging to notions that may or may not hold to the truth in Scriptures or in reality. I don’t need to fear challenges, questions, and differing opinions, as they can either a) affirm my current beliefs, or b) challenge my beliefs, helping rid me of some of those sacred cows – either way the questions can serve me and inform my life. They are not something I need to be afraid of.

This Space
On this blog I desire to encourage particularly those who might be struggling through some of the same specific questions we are wrestling with. That may mean I use some strong, opinionated language, but it doesn’t mean that I hold others of different opinions in judgment. I do critique our culture and institutions, but the individuals that comprise these are people that I love, and more importantly, people that God loves.

I also think there is value in sharing our real lives and our real opinions, not just the glossy cute parts that everyone can agree with. If we clam up, we do ourselves and nobody else any good: we don’t live honestly.

So, forward we go, making a multitude of mistakes along the way no doubt, so, thankful for the grace of God, yet eager to use words that not only uplift, but challenge! After all, life is too short to pursue the illusion of safety.

Books on table and floor, shelf removed from wall, shop vac to pick up shattered glass… What a mess!

Finally, getting things a little more tidy… only took four hours.

Ben was out late last night and so after the children were all neatly tucked in their beds I indulged in a little Pinterest sloth. I got all inspired to set up our rather cluttered library/craft room so that it would be more simple, beautiful and conducive to quiet activity.

Oh, a mother can dream, can’t she?

So, around 10:30 p.m. last night I put on some of Bach’s cello music, poured myself a tall glass of ice water, and started moving furniture. (I think moving furniture is one of the least expensive therapeutic activities there is.) Oh, it was fun! But I still wasn’t done an hour later, and Ben was home, so it was time to go to bed.

This morning I got up all excited to finish the job. The visions in my head were beautiful.

While I was shuffling stuff around on top of the book shelves, I thought, “Oh, this lovely, large old-fashioned pottery kerosene lamp will look perfect in the corner up here.” I went to place it right in the corner, only to realize too late that where the bookshelves met at the corner, there was a space between them and the wall. The lamp went crashing to the floor to an unreachable space between the wall-mounted shelves.

“Oh, well,” I thought to myself, “I guess those shards will be there till we move.”

Until we started to smell kerosene; I didn’t realize that it had been full of kerosene. So, turns out we had to clean it up after all. Thus, we had to unload an entire bookshelf, unscrew the whole thing from the wall, clean up the mess, vacuum the shards, blow dry the stink, replace the books, etc. etc.: all this work just to set up a room “for fun”.

So, where does that leave me? Well, the room feels better, though I still feel like doing some “Waldorf inspired” decorating (check my Pinterest if you’re interested). I also feel a little tired, and the room still stinks like kerosene (by the time I had gotten to the mess it had soaked into the bottom corner of the bookshelves). Hmmm.

Anyway, it’s too fun to stop. I like trying to move out the plastic, bold colored, busy-looking stuff, and replacing it with open space and more natural things. My 11-year-old also taught me how to use a drill, so that was a good homeschooling opportunity for me to learn from an expert. I also got to learn how to be patient (again) with a house full of noise, inopportune dirty diapers, math problems, lost workbooks, piano instruction, bonked heads, and an increasing explosion of paper that occurred while I was busy looking the other way. The opportunities for me to learn from this silly ‘make work’ project have been bountiful.

Mostly, I’m just thankful that it’s rest time… it should give me just enough time to figure out how I’m going to transform the family room.

Lots of love Ash

Beautiful Souls

Chapter 4 of Eyal Press’ Beautiful Souls turns our attention to the courageous proclamation of the truth; the dissenting voices of truth that break through the silence of the group. Press’ main character in this final chapter is Leyla Wydler, a tough and determined woman who has enjoyed a successful career as a financial adviser until she runs up against the challenges of the Stanford Group Company in Houston, TX. The chapter begins with an anonymous letter sent to various government financial authorities as well as a few media organizations, all in an effort to attract attention to suspected illegal activities at a well respected global financial firm. We quickly learn the suspicious mind behind the letter is Wydler and we also learn of the great courage and tenacity it took her to come to this point in her life…and the consequences her courage would bring upon her and her family. Proclaiming the truth in the midst of a group (or an entire society) that sees no wrong, perceives no harm, or believes no lies have been told is a difficult and often disorienting adventure. Press takes his readers on this adventure and allows us to see through the eyes of those who have proclaimed the truth and challenges us to hear and act.

Leyla Wydler’s success as a financial adviser is rooted in her great concern for her clients. As she closely investigated the many financial opportunities available for her clients’ financial investments, the in-house CD’s offered by her employer did not pass her inquisitive tests. Upon taking a closer look, her concerns only grew rather than being resolved. After two years of employment she was dismissed and subsequently targeted with additional lawsuits by her previous employer. As the difficult days dragged on, Press presents his readers with information about Wydler’s struggles and paints a picture that shows a woman who is incredibly self-reliant and independently successful…but also riddled with many episodes of fear and self-questioning. Proclaiming the truth in the midst of those who sit quietly has been given a term: whistleblower. The term “whistleblower” is full of mixed emotions: hero and traitor, courageous truth teller and crazy conspiracy advocate, just to name a few. Press discusses why these paradoxical thoughts enter into the minds of so many people: society admires those who seek justice and have the courage to raise the truth, but society also admires the characteristics of loyalty, sacrifice and deference to God, country and others…these two sides of society’s admiration compete for our understanding of how we view those who speak out in difficult times. (p. 152)

Press continues to outline the life and challenges of those who speak out against injustice and those who would do wrong to others to gain advantage. His examples give the reader much to think about, including a fascinating insight about the difficulties of these “office working” warriors. Press poses the question: I “wonder whether, in some ways, it was harder – more socially isolating, more psychologically disorienting – to feel that someone was out to obliterate you in a prosperous, peaceful city like Houston than in, say, war-blasted Vukovar.” (p. 165) Press’ thought is based on the fear and intimidation experienced by others who do not appreciate the changes that result from the release of the truth, the change of life that occurs when the previously hidden facts are exposed to the light of day. People’s lives are changed…and not always in good ways. The guilty may go to jail, and those in-the-know who remained quiet (and maybe benefited in some way) face the potential shame of not raising their voice in support of the truth. Those who proclaim the truth invariably gain strength from others in these difficult times. Press continues by stating, “breaking ranks is significantly easier when a person can draw on some form of ‘mutual support,’ when there is another person who sees things the way you do.” Once again, we find that community is at the center of all that we do and all that is life giving.

Questions for reflection:

• After reading the Passion of Christ, reflect on Peter’s challenge of speaking the truth to those who challenge him on his association with Jesus. What are the difficulties Peter might face if he speaks the truth? Knowing that group support makes speaking the truth easier, what might have aided Peter during his time of need?
• Consider a challenging time in your own life. Reflect on how you might have responded to this challenge if you were alone; and how you might have responded with the support of others’ love and trust?

For your viewing pleasure, Duke (11) has put together his first video called: “Mr. Stepdance”.

He’s been having fun learning how to use Garageband and iMovie lately… I’ll spare you having to listen to “What Makes You Chicken-full”, a farm adaptation of the Piano Guys tune “What Makes You Beautiful”.

Enjoy!

TRAVELLING FAMILIES

All of the families here are self-funded.  I know that there’s some people who have the (mistaken) belief that families who travel long-term are either very rich… or they leech off other people.  This isn’t the case at all.  Most of these families have deliberately chosen to sacrifice things like stable jobs, homes, cars and “stuff” so that they can travel the world with their kids.  They earn a living in a number of different ways – but mostly, they rely on their laptops and the internet.

Edventure Project – Jenn, Tony and their 4 children have been travelling the world for years.  I’m a regular reader of their blog.  One of my favourite articles is this one where Jenn talks about her very unconventional upbringing by parents who have always thought completely out of the box.  Reading that story made me more than just a little bit jealous (in a good way).

Going Anyway – One of the most inspiring blogs I’ve read.  Jill and Chris (and their 5 children – one of whom has profound Cerebral Palsy) – went travelling all over Asia for a year.  In spite of the nay-sayers and doubters – they “went anyway” – and discovered that long-term travel benefitted their family in such profound ways, that they’re currently back in Australia (their home country), taking some time to sort a few things out before they hit the road again.  I just love the “can do” attitude of this family.  The world has so many whingers and grumblers – and this family just goes out there and makes things happen.  They even MADE a wheelchair that could accommodate Sparky’s travelling needs (because they couldn’t find anything suitable on the market).

Escape Artistes – Theodora is a single mother who has been travelling the world with her 12 year-old son, Zac, for over 3 years.  Her blog is definitely not for the faint-hearted.  She is VERY frank… (and very funny!).  I actually think I’m a bit scared of her (in a good way, of course!).

Living Outside of the Box – This is a very sweet family.  Alisa, Jared and their 3 kids are constantly on the move.  Travelling families do things differently (like all families).  Some are more interested in slow travel (settling down in one place for a month or three whilst exploring surrounding areas).  This family, however, move quickly… from town-to-town, city-to-city, country to country.  Their blog has lots of photos!  :-)

1 Dad, 1 Kid, 1 Crazy Adventure – Talon (a single dad) travels the world with his son, Tigger.  Talon is pretty unconventional in many ways and proves, once again, that you don’t have to be hugely rich to be able to travel the world.  One of his most powerful blogs was this one entitled “What death taught me about how to live”.

The Great Family Escape – I have followed this family’s blog for quite a while… watching them plan, prepare, save and get rid of all of their stuff.  Finally, they are on the road and following their dream (challenges and all).  I get such a “feel good” feeling when I read about their adventures.

Raising Miro – Lainie and her son, Miro, have been travelling for over 3 and a half years (currently based in Peru).  Lainie, I think, doesn’t do anything “the normal way” – (and I mean that in a good way).  She pushes the boundaries of life – and lives it on her terms.

Ramble Crunch - Renee, Mark… their daughter Scout and their dog, Archie – are currently slow-travelling through Mexico.  Prior to that, they spent a year touring Europe and Turkey in a second-hand RV.  I really enjoy their laid-back attitude to life (and I enjoy Renee’s writing).

Worldschool Adventures – This family does things a bit differently.  For half the year, they travel internationally.  The other half, they spend living in Canada (in a camper)… living pretty frugally… and working hard to save up for their next 6 month of adventure.  Which just goes to show – there are MANY ways to live the life you want to live.

PEOPLE WHO DON’T SEND THEIR KIDS TO SCHOOL

Apart from all the families above who homeschool / unschool / world-school or (in the case of Ramble Crunch) send their kids to local schools – depending on where they’re located…  there are other people whose blogs I read – who think out of the box when it comes to education.  Here are some of my favourites:

The Path Less Taken – Jennifer has written an explanation of unschooling in FAQ format here.

Here’s a brilliant presentation given by a talented filmmaker (who was unschooled).

Here’s an explanation about unschooling in FAQ format from a 19 year old who has never been to school.

A radical viewpoint from one family (that I resonate with on so many levels).

A post from a homeschooling mom who gradually transitioned to unschooling.

Long-term travel as education – by Jenn Miller.

Another great article on life-learning.

Okay… that’s all for now (but there’s actually LOADS more out there)…

Enjoy the reading!  :-)

Beautiful Souls

Press opens his third chapter with the story of Henry David Thoreau and Thoreau’s famous support for claims of personal conscienceness and actions of civil disobedience. Press quotes Thoreau: “I am not responsible for the successful working of the machinery of society. The only obligation which I have a right to assume, is to do at any time what I think right.” Press insightfully evaluates Thoreau’s starkly individualistic claim, “[Thoreau's claim] is a bracingly uncomprimising worldview. But if this is all that saying no entails, what beyond salving one’s own conscience comes of it? If one person’s subjective values can be invoked to break the law and resist government, why can’t another, radically different set of personal convictions?” (p. 87) Press continues to pose questions, but his point has already been made – who gets to decide “right” and “wrong.” Differing sides could take up the argument for a long time and ideological trench warfare ensues…if you are sceptical, look at Washington, D.C. and the lack of progress that has come out of the recent political quagmire there. Press introduces us to his main character of chapter 3, Avner Wishnitzer, and takes us on a journey describing Avner’s experience in the Israeli Army, a journey that helps to answer the question of personal conscience.

Avner Wishnitzer was born and raised on a kibbutz in Israel, Kvutzat Shiller. A lean and gawky youth, Avner took to Tae Kwon Do in his early teens and was a junior national champion by age 17. A quiet and thoughtful person by nature, the discipline of Tae Kwon Do helped Avner expand his horizons and discover many things about himself, including the fact that he had the toughness and discipline to complete the training to become a member of the elite group Sayeret Matkal. Avner served his time in this elite Army group and then left active duty, continuing to serve as a Reservist when duty called. However, his sister invited him to a lecture that introduced him to yet unknown (unknown by Avner) challenges of the Palestinian people. Avner was troubled by what he saw and his personal commitments and understandings of the world underwent great examination. Press presents his readers with a detailed description of Avner’s dilemmas, presenting relevant information of the Israeli Army and its closeknit makeup, the familial bonds of the Army and how the Army is viewed in Israel. The unique character of the Israeli people and their history presented Avner with many difficult decisions as he slowly pursued his desire to take action against Israel’s treatment of the Palestinian people in the “occupied territories.” Avner, and fellow Army members who objected, received harsh treatment from many people, some very close friends and family members. Press also introduces his readers to a few minor characters who refuse to take action against Jewish settlers, in effect taking the opposite position of Avner and his colleagues. Again, who is right as one stands up and takes actions based on personal conscience and how far can they be allowed to take their cause? Press details a short history of conscientious objectors in the US and points to the large scale problem experienced during the Vietnam War era: “Accommodating a smattering of Christian pacifists had been easy enough. Granting citizens of any spiritual or ideological persuasion the right to refuse to fight in particular wars, simply because it didn’t line up with what they believed to be right, was another matter entirely.” (p. 108) Press points to the challenging nature of conflict and the role of any government in taking actions to support the claims and treaties of the country but realizing some of the nation’s citizens will object. Again, who is right and who gets to decide?

Eyal Press closes his chapter with a thoughtful quote from Susan Sontag: “Appeal to the existence of a higher law that authorizes us to defy the laws of the state can be used to justify criminal transgession as well as the noblest struggle for justice. It is the content of the resistance that determines its merit, its moral necessity.” (p. 121) Sontag’s quote helps us get closer to the answer of who might be right when saying no, but Press adds one final thought to fill our imaginations a bit more. Press writes, “…assessing the ability – or inability – of those saying no to stretch their moral imaginations by putting themselves in the shoes of people who were suffering and extending sympathy to them.” (p. 122) The essence of chapter 3 is for us to realize that in the course of our lives, if we are open to the changing ways of the world and our own personal growing awareness of the world, we will be challenged to stretch our moral imaginations; and hopefully we will succeed in stretching to the point where we can put ourselves in the shoes of others and do something that matters.

Questions for reflection:

• Have you ever experienced an occasion that required you to act differently from the “rules” or the “expectations” of your group? What were your challenges and what compelled you to take action; or what concerns caused you to not take action?
• During this time of Lent, read the Passion of Christ (in any of the four Gospels) and consider the challenges of Jesus as he stands up to the authorities, and consider what gives him his confidence in his time of despair, even as his friends leave him. Follow Jesus to the cross and imagine yourself in this scene – what do you learn about yourself?

Over dinner the other night Ben began drawing a diagram on the chalkboard wall by the table: as the children did the addition, he documented each individual’s increasing age progressing forward in five year increments. We had such fun, chattering about the new realities that each five year jump would introduce into our lives.

In just 10 years, our oldest will be in his early 20’s and our baby will be 11! The time already feels like it’s flying. At one point, upon mentioning that someone would be in their mid-twenties, that child perked up cheerfully, and commented, “I could be mating by then!” At which point the entire table burst into peals of laughter and dad asked if that child was a goat or a human?

The children continued to take it further, “Mom, imagine if you and Dad had ten kids, then we all had ten kids, then they all had ten kids… you’d have 1,000 great-grand children!”

“We’d impact generations!” Another shouted with gusto.

“Well, you don’t have to worry about me,” assured my eight-year-old daughter, as though anyone doubted her aspirations, “I’ll be having plenty of babies.”

In spite of all the ambitious speculating, the activity made quite an impression on Ben and me. In just a few short seasons our bustling house could be reduced to a stop-n-stay for grown children who no longer live between these boisterous walls. The noise, the dirty floors, the toy-splatter and piles of dishes will feel like a taunting dream in that future reality. There will be too much time to plant perfect gardens and read through the ever-expanding booklist. I’m sure I will end up like my precious grandparents, who, when they knew we were making the five hour trek to visit them, would stand by their front window or on the driveway all day long, waiting in anticipation of our arrival.

“For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away,” says the book of James. All the hurdles and burdens and struggles we now face will quickly pass us by. These are the days to be thankful for and ‘plug in’ to the needs of our children, and establish them in truth and wisdom, faith and love with every breath and ounce of strength we have in us. This is no time for self-pity, complaints and despair; these are the foundational days of our life work!

Even today we are building a legacy for our children’s children; we are building the future with these tired hands.

This is work fit for Kings and Queens.