The key point I took from the article is that it is an attitude of giving yourself permission to believe in your dream and acting on it. By not giving myself permission to pursue the dream I lost a lot of time, past by opportunities that may never come again but in the last five years I’ve been slowly changing my attitude, slowly moving myself to the top of my priority list. I’ve been working towards my dream though it’s been modified, improved and grown over the years but most importantly I’m taking myself and my art seriously, establishing my design craft as a top priority in my life. I may not be an architect or design beautiful homes (yet) but I am pursuing art and design in fashion and creating and successfully selling my artisan hand crafted wire jewelry online at http://www.simplykaties.etsy.com It is a project I’ve been working on since the Summer of 2005 selling face to face at roadside stands and flea market booths, I added the Etsy shop in December of 2011 and am working on site improvements to my SK Wire Jewelry website http://skwirejewelry.com on WordPress.org.

The most important lesson I’ve learned – attitudes are powerful factors on how our lives play out and if you don’t believe in yourself no one else will either but if you show the world you’re an artist the world will support that vision of you. So if you’re the creative type and your dream is to be an artist, (writer, poet, sculptor, or actor/actress) my advice to you is this – read books about it, push yourself to improve your craft and always indulge your ideas in your art. Establish a regular daily work schedule being an artist is a viable career so treat it like one, limit outside distractions. Honor your imagination it’s what makes your art unique and be open to seeing the inspiration everywhere around you. Be generous with yourself and others, your art is a gift of yourself you give the world – give it freely.

What is your dream and how will you make it come true?

In a world where businesses are trying to sell you more and more stuff – where we are told that we can’t be happy unless we have this and that and that and that and also this – the vast majority of us  attribute great meaning to inanimate objects.

The result?

We have more relationships with inanimate objects than with human beings!”

This statement from healthdemystified’s recent post (http://wp.me/p27ySS-gS) is today’s reality our face to face social time has been replaced with increasingly unreasonable corporate demands for our time focusing only on the company’s bottom line and not the health of the human asset itself. Corporations gain our off time as well, we as consumers are the driving force behind the infinite upgrades, apps and plug-ins of technology allowing the average individual with Internet access the ability to live globally without even leaving their home or office. What happened to the after work gathering of colleagues for a drink at the local watering hole to de-clutter the happenings of the day? Or meeting a friend over coffee at the local café, afternoon shopping, or a dinner date to truly socialize and get the scoop on what’s up? It’s been replaced over the last few decades with a plethora of Internet social “networking” sites like My Space, FaceBook and tons of others geared at creating on-line communities of like minded people from around the globe.

The result?

We are corrupting and disrupting our own well being, and we are diminishing our own local economy’s with global consumerism.

If you think about it we can probably attribute the high average unemployment rate as reflective of the rate of advancement in technology and social media. The population in general has lost sight of the importance of actual face to face human interaction; the important of visual gestures and physical touch to our physical and emotional well being. It’s really no wonder why the obesity rate and health care costs are sky high in America and why employers are opting to refrain from offering health care any longer. Employers are not willing to risk hiring older more qualified individuals in long term positions because their cost of care rises higher quicker over the term of their employment than does the cost of a younger persons. But that’s not the only reason older workers are being left out of the re-employment race, we are unfairly seen as no longer coach-able and therefore deemed less valuable without consideration of our experience and qualifications. The result is this we are actively participating in turning a vital corporate asset in human production into a liability ultimately viewing ourselves as expendable.

Our cultural beliefs have changed and as long as we look for ways to fulfill our lives I believe they’ll keep changing. Holding onto a mentality that says you have to have the newest or biggest this, this and that just because your friend or neighbor has one isn’t living your true life. Think of it this way you’re walking the midway of the local state fair being heckled from both sides by guys and gals (marketers) saying their game (company/brand) is the best, their prizes (products & services) are bigger and better and your odds of winning are higher with this game over that other game (yea right!). It all boils down to a simple human choice are you going to take the left fork which takes you down Jones’ road where you’re bombarded and influenced by others, or the right fork on which you live your own true life being happy with what and who you choose to have in your life.

Me, I’m not sure when I started to understand that having material possessions wasn’t ever going to be the most important goal in my life. And that the idea of climbing the corporate ladder wasn’t how I wanted to live my life.  That being stuck in an office for 8 to 10 hours a day to earn a living answering to another human being just isn’t my cup of tea and besides who said “they” are more qualified, intelligent or important than I and my well being. I’ve tried to conform to the corporate lifestyle but the longer I tried the more I became increasingly stressed, unhappy and overwhelmed with the attitudes and demands. But as for consumerism I’ve never put myself in a position where I played into the whole game of pocketbook retail roulette. I never had to have the newest, biggest or best of anything, not that I don’t think I’m worth it but because all I truly need or desire is to have what fulfills my immediate need to survive. Anything above that is paying the cost of having the luxury of functions I don’t need and probably won’t use anyway and for padding the company bank account behind the brand name.

It is possible to simplify your life in the age of the ‘Jones’ mentality’, hurried advances in technology, social media and mobile commerce. The first step is the most important and takes the longest amount of time in the change process; it is to reassess your life evaluate what’s absolutely important to you then decide what you can and can’t live or survive without. It is as simple as making a choice then committing yourself to de-cluttering your mental, emotional and physical life of the things that weigh you down and zap your energy. You are the most important decision maker in your life and you are the only person who controls your thoughts actions and reactions to everything playing out and being thrown at you in life. It’s your life and it’s all up to you so live it the best way you know how.

All the confusion

And the pain.

Through all the loneliness

And strife

And shame.

I will fight against it all.

The poetic works of ineffablemrjones.wordpress.com are inspirational motivators to me in my pursuit to recover and nurture my artist. It is the thought and the intention of the poet, the perception of the words I find inspiring. I have not considered the realm of poetic prose in my own repertoire but I would not cast it aside though at this point I am comfortable writing in my journals and exercising my creative energy in the articles I write for my blogs and my jewelry descriptions for my shop SK Wire Jewelry by Simply Katie’s on Etsy.

I’m fighting against the odds I stacked against myself to achieve the ultimate goal of opening to the fullest extent the vault of my creative talent exploring its vast contents, and for me it’s like looking in through the window at Tiffany’s. Every area of creative interest not yet experienced, every talent waiting to be unmasked and those seeking recovery are like the glistening gold and clear sparkling diamonds on display in that window waiting to be tried on, passionately experienced, self affirmed and shown off for others to appreciate. I am part of a handmade culture and community and though I am not seeking fame and fortune to see my jewelry in demand would be affirmation enough, but to earn a prosperous living from it would be my life’s dream realized. It is the effort I put into nurturing and developing my jewelry design talent that will reach help me this milestone to reap the rewards. I have but a few of my best items on display at SK Wire Jewelry by Simply Katie’s on Etsy and as I am inspired, allowing myself to nurture and experience the creative talent of my inner artist I will be adding new designs to my  shop.

The designs I create are simple, in the minimalist style but timelessly classic, elegant and befitting a modern lifestyle. Every piece of jewelry is an original design and each step of the design process is carefully considered in order to produce a well constructed quality piece of handmade jewelry. I use quality materials and hand pick each stone and every bead hand craft chain links and closures and bring all these elements together in a complimenting palate and stylish design. Most of my earrings and necklaces are hand crafted with solid copper wire with some earrings being created from sterling silver as well. My designs vary in complexity and composition with some featuring semi precious stone beads, pebbles and chips as well as other natural materials while others feature glass beads and re-purposed vintage jewelry.  If you’d like to see more of my jewelry designs and explore the Etsy community and all the handmade and vintage items it has to offer spend a few minutes to browse all the handmade art, crafts and vintage shops, I know you’ll enjoy the experience.

Robert Louis Stevenson

I was at the library about a week or so ago to pick up a book called Jewelry Making and Design by Augustus Rose and Antonio Cirino. It’s a well illustrated and laid out textbook for beginning jewelry designers. I’ve previously read sections on tools, techniques and metals, learning about material selection and applications. Now I find myself reading the section on the principles of jewelry design because I want to understand more about the process in which I delve creatively. But my fascination is leaning in a direction more towards history of and integration of art and design in regards to the subtopic of jewelry. What spiked my particular interest was a recent article I read about an upcoming exhibition of what are popularly known as “lover’s eyes” at the Birmingham Museum of Art. Miniature portraits were popular from the mid-eighteenth to mid-nineteenth centuries and in my opinion a true mastery of artist skill. These intimate portraits commemorated such occasions as births, deaths, marriages, and other separations and were painted in watercolor on either ivory or parchment depending on a commissioner’s budget. You can read more about “lover’s eyes” in an article I wrote and posted on my SK Wire Jewelry website titled the secret history of “lover’s eyes” they really are fascinating.

But I’ve gotten off the real subject of this article, the rebirth of the artist within. It’s kind of a continuation of my previous post Burning embers and keeping the dream alive. And as stated in Robert Louis Stevenson’s quote that which kept my soul alive. But while I was at the library to check out the other book I also stop by and check out the titles they have on the sale shelf right inside the door looking for nothing in particular but found a couple that peeked my interest. I’ve felt more often than not that because of choices I’ve made in life I’ve blocked my own creative energy, held it in and failed to nurture it, and believing that this is my true calling I am desperate to unblock that energy. I believe I’m off to a good start by having the courage to write about my personal dilemma which is in effect letting go of some self doubt and anxiety about my work not being good enough for others to see and appreciate. This feeling of blockage comes and goes as it does for most creative types and in reality I’ve had the courage to open an Etsy shop, create a Facebook fan page, a website and several blogs but I am a procrastinator and don’t post or create any new designs with any kind of consistency, this is my dilemma caused by a serious blockage of creative energy.

To help me in achieving my goal and affirming myself as an artist I purchased The Artist’s Way: A spiritual path to higher creativity, a course in discovering and recovering your creative self written by Julia Cameron. A “twelve step” recovery program for artists of all kinds and for a mere investment of seventy-five cents I’m recognizing much about myself within the pages and am finding it liberating for my soul. The program starts with affirmations and what’s called “morning pages” which is essentially de-cluttering your mind and releasing your negative energy. I’ve kept journals for many years off and on and I find it relaxing to put all my negative thoughts down on paper in a notebook. This was and is an easy task for me but my journals typically revolve around specific subjects and lately involve more research than actual thoughts. The information gathered within these journals is what the world tells me I ought to prefer, not particularly what I actually prefer so to really buckle down and change my thought process hasn’t been that easy. I’ve been trying for more years than I want to admit and the reality of the blockage began with a traumatic childhood event and I continued to be manipulated by guilt until I said enough was enough. So here I am making a conscious decision to be responsible to myself first and take back my life as I envisioned it to be, willing to experience my creative energy and to affirm my creative talent.

If you feel your artist is blocked too I hope you’ll join me in this journey to recover and experience the gift of your creative energy as I unblock mine. The best way to unlock your future is to unclog your mind, release your negative energies it can make a positive difference in many areas of your life. It’s worked for me it can work for you too. Start today – leave me a comment

Lucius Annaeus Seneca

The next time you are in a situation where it is customary to give a gift like a holiday, anniversary, or birthday consider this, the most meaningful and memorable gifts come from the heart as Lucius says it is the intention that is the true gift.

A gift in any sense of the word is not always a material object but an act of kindness and support. Doing things like providing a service to someone in need, giving a friendly smile to a stranger, making a call to a friend to say hi, or saying thank you to the bag boy at the grocery store. It’s often the little things that count the most in life which are sometimes taken for granted without us even noticing because we’re too busy running around trying to find a balance between family, work and activities in our lives. Did you know the least expensive gift is the simple acknowledgment it takes just a minute of our time and can go a long way in creating, mending and promoting healthy happier relationships for us all. I think gifts given with true intention don’t need to wait for a special occasion or holiday, certain gifts are meant to be given every day, so when the inspiration hits you go ahead and give the kind of gift that keeps on giving.

This is true in any aspect of life; friends, lovers, colleagues, even family members can become toxic, and in my case they did. I set my sights on giving myself opportunities to grow, to learn new things, to explore new out of the way places, to travel, to really experience life. I wanted to give my children a better life than the one I saw myself in several years ago. I was for all intents and purposes miserable, miserable at work, miserable at home and just all around unhappy with my life in general. I had a job I hated I had a man whom I resented for not supporting me as a partner for not contributing to the household and resentful towards my children for not accepting responsibility for their actions. I often wondered why was this happening to me, where did I go wrong didn’t I give them all the love they needed?

Bridges of the past

The resentment I felt for the man I lived with ran deep in my veins, he was physically able to hold down a job, to help me pay the bills and put food on the table. He was capable of supporting me as a mother directing her children to do their chores and homework, to pick up after themselves and mind their manners. Isn’t this what a partner should do for the person they love?  This is what I always believed a love relationship involved respect, support and participation but why did I feel as though I was the only one participating in our relationship. As it turned out he wasn’t the man I thought he was, he definitely wasn’t responsible, nor was he respectful and neither was he honest with me or with himself. I resented him so much I turned the anger in on myself and built a stone wall around my heart, convinced myself never to get involved with another man because they weren’t worth my time or effort, they were good for nothing and just plain ignorant to the emotions of other human beings.

Waking up

I was wrong for resenting my children for the way this and other men treated me, they were not totally at fault though they had a tendency to listen more to them then me, but I should have been more stern, stood up for myself and stood my ground. I was wrong for treating myself with disrespect, for backing down and letting them get away with how they were disrespecting me. Lord knows I tried in every way to stand my ground but the arguments just got worse and louder as they went on, I was tired of fighting and I gave up. I suppose because I stayed with this man as long as I did, nine and a half years, and no matter how many times I told him to get out fighting over money and responsibility, I should have just packed up our things and left. But I’m a stubborn woman and everything the house/apartments and utilities were all in my name and I was paying them. I was putting a roof over my child’s head, food in his belly, clothes on his back, getting him off to school and working full time being the responsible parent, or so I thought.

In retrospect I should have left and turned the utilities off, informed the landlords I was moving out and left him to deal with his own life from then on out. Why was I so afraid to take back my life my dignity and self respect?  Maybe it wasn’t as much fear but shame, shame for doing this to myself and my children, for getting into that situation in the first place, for the financial hole he helped dig me into and for having to crawl back home. I worked up the courage to crawl back home leaving my other half behind to pick up his own pieces while I struggled to do the same. I left on a Monday the day after Father’s Day in 2005 and I felt good, I was determined to get my life put back together and move on and by the end of March 2007 I had my own place again. Those nine and a half years were a de-ja-vu experience for me, it was like living with my father all over again, the verbal and emotional abuse left scars not only on me but on my children as well, but they (my children) are wrong for believing all they are to me is slaves.

A brighter tomorrow

I’ve forgiven myself for the abuse I put myself though, I forgave my mother for the hurt she caused when I was a child (that’s a different bridge), and I forgave my grandmother for what she said too. But I had to also accept the reason she said “I don’t want anything more to do with you if you stay with him”, she was trying to make me see that he was hurting me, she was trying to protect me. My mother passed last year and I’m glad we had the chance to repair our relationship before she left because it would’ve broken my heart even more if we hadn’t. (I love you Mom, I miss you you’re always in my heart. Thank you for everything you gave me love, support, encouragement and discipline. I never could have done it without you). My grandmother (my mom’s mom) is 98 years old and though she can’t get around like she used to she is still alert and active, our relationship has been renewed and she told me “We love each other that’s all that matters”. Though my relationship with my children is still at odds I love them dearly and won’t give up on them and the hope of us coming together as a family again.

And the wall I built around my heart has come down thanks to a wonderful caring man I met at the end of last year who made me see that all men are not the same. He gives me everything I ever dreamed of emotionally, in the short time we’ve know each other he’s stood with me through my emotional battles, forgiven my childlike outbursts and stood strong in faith and belief in us, he completes me and renders me whole. He provides understanding, a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen without judgment he provides strength and courage to keep me working towards a better tomorrow and he gives me confidence through his encouragement to follow my heart and chase my dreams. But what I love most about him is that he loves me for me and not for anything else and embraces my family as they were his own.