I came into this 3 day weekend with plans of grandeur. A clean car! Garden! Work out! Cook 100 meals from scratch to freeze!
My lofty expectations have fallen flat. 230 more words
I didn’t actually say that. I just ignored the message from the “cool, funny and fun to hang with” 42-year old who asked if I was “into any aspect of tickling” in his first message to me on OkCupid. 680 more words
Excitement is really the only cure for jet lag–and thank god I’ve got a surplus of it.
After a tearful good-bye to my cat Friday afternoon I zipped over to O’Hare and boarded my 8 hour flight to Frankfurt where I had a layover to catch my final plane to Bergen, Norway. 337 more words
I’m going to let you all in on a little secret: the UPROXX staff basically only talks to each other in The Simpsons and 30 Rock… 409 more words
If you’ve ever been on WebMD (or really, anywhere on the internet), you’re probably aware it’s only a short matter of time before you come to the conclusion that you have somehow contracted Dengue Fever and Lyme Disease and have an inoperable nasal tumor that is going to grow into your brain causing you die in 24 hours from dehydration and lacerations. 371 more words