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They say the most shocking turns of our lives are the most unexpected. I can certainly attest to that after my surprise encounter with Mike Myers’ The Love Guru.

I was in upstate NY this past weekend, visiting some of my wife’s relatives. It was during the typical mid-day small-talk-a-thon that one such relative (let’s call him Mr. X) asked the question, “Hey, have you seen The Love Guru?”

Naturally I was taken aback by this. Did I really just get asked this question? Of course I haven’t seen it. Who has?

So, I told Mr. X that no, I have not, and proceeded to listen to him tell me that I NEED to see it. That’s it’s “stupid in an awesome sort of way” and “horrible, but funny”. These words of encouragement were not succeeding at all. My resolve in never seeing this movie was resolute. There was simply NO WAY I was ever going to subject myself to watching this film.

NO. WAY.

Until about 3 hours later, that is. “What are you doing?” I asked Mr. X. “Putting in a DVD,” he said. I asked to see the cover…

NOT hysterical

Oh god. My nightmare was coming true. I was about to spend the evening with…The Love Guru.

Now, I’m going to assume most of you have not seen it. So, let me give you the highlights. Mind you, this isn’t the plot because I’m pretty sure there was none. I’ll add that as my first highlight:

1. No plot. Something about a hockey team needing spiritual help or something. Who cares.

2. An elephant pooping on someone.

3. An elephant humping another elephant on the ice during a hockey game with Mike Myers riding the back of one of them. Upon completion of said humping Mr. Myers mimicked having an orgasm. Truly one of the most horrifying things I have ever seen.

4. Mike Myers acting out a blowjob with his hands and mouth. (a.k.a.: The second most horrifying thing I have ever seen.)

5. Sir Ben Kingsley doing an imitation of an Indian Guru so badly that it would make Ghandi (a man he portrayed for Oscar gold, mind you) question passive resistance.

For shame, Ben

6. More Mike Myers garbage seen dozens of times before: mugging to the camera, every character name is a bad pun about penises, abuse towards little people, etc.

If not for Righteous Kill, this movie would probably be the very worst I have ever seen.

Now, back to Mr. X who made the torture of being subjected to this movie even worse by repeating every line in the movie and laughing uproariously. Not only that, but the man actually rewound the movie a number of times because I wasn’t paying attention! My whole plan was to not pay attention! Gah!

So, in closing, let this serve as a warning. The Love Guru has Mike Myers having an orgasm in his pants and fans that can’t get enough of it.

My prescription? Fire. And lots of it!

–Cap’n Blackjack

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Bollywood News and Gossips, videos, wallpapers, hot,  galleries, fashion , models, events, astrology, daily news, education, love guru, singstar, personality, painting, more… www.dhangout.com

It’s officially the future, people, and while there may not be flying cars just yet, the advancements in technology are plentiful. Especially when it comes to gettin’ some. Yes, sex has gone tech, and I’m talking about more than those nakey photos you’ve been sending to the boyf. (Which is a bad, bad idea. Has Vanessa Hudgens taught you nothing?!)

Below, a list of the sexiest things in tech:

For Your iPhone

Got an iPhone? No? Well, maybe it’s time to spend the cashola, because when it comes to sex, well, there’s an app for that. Here are a few of my favorites.

Cosmo’s Sex Position of the Day
This app is a to-go version of the Cosmo Kama Sutra. It offers a new sex position every day, as well as instructions and advice, illustration, and a difficulty rating (for those girls who are always up for a challenge).

The Love Guru
The Love Guru app gives you daily love predictions based on your zodiac sign, and lets you know the best time to make your move.

101 Cheesy Pick Up Lines
We’d all roll our eyes if a guy actually tried to use one of these on us, but they can be a great way to break the ice with that hottie you’ve been eying across the bar. After all, using these lines takes confidence and a sense of humor, both turn-ons.

Massager for iPhone
OK, so maybe putting your iPhone in your happy place isn’t the smartest (or most sanitary) idea, but it’s definitely something to consider if you ever get a little….lonely.

For Your Computer

Skype
If you’re separated from your hunny over break, Skype is the best way to keep the passion going. Skype offers free webcam chatting, so you talk face-to-face with S.O. instead of gluing your cell phone to your ear. To spice things up, wear something extra sexy (or nothing at all). Just make sure he’s not hanging in the living room with the fam… or taking screenshots to send to his homies.

Teledildonics
Teledildonics are sex toys that connect to the internet, so you can have someone else operate them from far away (handy if you’re in an LDR, or just really like chat rooms).

OhMiBod Vibrator
Hook it up to your favorite iTunes playlist (or the one that has the most bass), and enjoy your music in a new – and more intimate – way. It’s almost like getting a private, very special performance from the likes of Usher, The Rolling Stones or whoever you’ve got playing. (Though I advice against anything by David Archuleta or Justin Bieber…that’s just creepy.)

Love Guru (2009) Hindi Movie Mp3 Audio Songs 128Kbps , 320Kbps , Rm , AAC Original Cd Rips VBR OST Direct Links Free Rapidshare , Mediafire Download With Cd Covers & Poster

Love Guru (2009)

Cast & Crew :: Rocky Sandhu, Monalisa, Tarun Arora & Janki Shah
Music :: Nirmal D., Daboo Malik & Nazaqat-Sujaat
Director :: Rahul Kapoor
Producer :: Evershine Films Pvt Ltd
Ripper :: tEam AtoZmp3

-= TrackList =-

01 – Vaishali Samant – Non Stop Mujhe Pyaar Kar
02 – Shaan – Pyaar Ki Nai Takrir
03 – Vinod Rathod & Sunidhi Chauhan – Uncho Uncho Mharo Ghagaro
04 – Shaan & Soumya Rai – Dekhona Dekhona

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD THE SONGS

I’ve been searching for some romantic lines for my girl, and after searching throughout the night, I found it. Ask her, and she’ll tell you that I’m as much a Tapori as the pair of socks you’re wearing.

Not after reading this, she won’t.

Need I say more? The Love Guru returns, baby! With a vengeance!

Poem Courtesy: Someone named Vinay over at Funtoosh.com

After hearing about Epix for weeks now from Curt Marvis at Lionsgate at both #DH09 and #DMWC, I was psyched to hear this morning that they were giving away 72 hour passes to the EpixHD site this weekend.  Click here to get yours.  Great news for those of us who don’t have FiOS and want another Hulu on the scene.  Epix is a free streaming movie site stocked with the libraries of Paramount, Lionsgate, MGM – from blockbusters to classics to original programming.  Not sure what type of access any of us will have after the weekend, but hopefully we’re looking at another distribution partner for features and webisodes.  Launching with a beautifully clean interface, available to watch right now for free is Cloverfield, GI Joe, Iron Man, Spiderwick Chronicles, Flash Gordon, Love Guru, Madonna, Eat Drink Man Woman, Everybody Wants To Be Italian, Romance & Cigarettes, Dead Again, Crimes & Misdemeanors, Purple Rose of Cairo, Annie Hall, Stepford Wives, Godfather, Box of Moonlight and more.  Better selection than Fancast (Chaplin, Google Me, Hair, MacHeads, Meet the Mobsters, RIP Remix Manifesto, Supersize Me, Slacker…), Sling (Fiddler On The Roof, Heidi, Thief of Bagdad, Birth of a Nation…), Joost (Road to Bali, Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure, Primal Fear, His Girl Friday…), and Crackle (Johnny Mnemonic, People v Larry Flynt, Shampoo, SLC Punk, Wolf..) combined.  Actually, now that I’ve taken a second look, I’m pretty impressed with their interfaces and selections too. Enjoy!

If you’ve read or listened to relationships experts, you know that some of what they say is just common sense. They tell us things we already know, but they’re great at putting it into words and examples that make things easier to understand. The best relationships experts just know how to communicate.

They can take those common sense things and say them in a way that makes you “get it.” Like the concept of what to expect and what to give in a relationship. This is one of the best lessons you can get from relationships experts.

Very often we go along in a relationship and as time goes on we start to take the other person for granted a little bit. We don’t thank them as much, and sometimes we don’t do nice things in return for them quite as much.

It’s not that we don’t want to, but that we simply forget or think there will be time later. After the relationship hit a rocky period and ended and you’ve gotten back together, remember to be thoughtful and kind becomes very important. Relationships experts stress that as a good way to keep a relationship strong.

A second great lesson from the experts is to do what the other person will appreciate. This is another great common sense lesson that’s all too easy to overlook. It applies to anytime during a relationship but after you’ve gotten back together from a break up or other bad patch it’s even more important.

To do what the other person wants doesn’t mean you should never consider yourself. But you should try to do what appeals to them to show them that you care. If it really makes you happy when your boyfriend helps you wash the dishes, then maybe if you helped him with some housework that would make him feel loved, too.

But there may be ways he likes to feel loved that are different. He might be the type of person who likes to hear you say it often, or likes romantic gestures. Even if those things aren’t as important to you, you need to do the things that are special to him.

Sometimes we forget that, or we just assume that everyone responds to the same things. But doing what makes the other person feel most special is easy to do, as long as we remind ourselves to do it.

And a lesson that the love experts teach that often goes forgotten is respect. Of course, you respect your boyfriend or girlfriend, but does it always show? This is part of taking them for granted but goes beyond not thanking them or returning loving gestures.

Often, the person we’re closest to gets the brunt our worst days. We might be late for something and keep them waiting, or we might just accidentally be inconsiderate and not apologize enough. Take a lesson from the relationships experts and ask yourself if you treat your partner with the same respect you would treat a parents or co-worker.

You can actually get more relationship help from here as well. In fact, it’s a dedicated system just for couples.

This question is thrown around a lot.

How to make a girl/boy fall in love with you?

Don’t worry people, The Love Guru is here to solve all your doubts!

Guys
Steps to make a girl fall in love with you!

• Sing for her (But please don’t become Himesh Reshamiya)

• Cook for her (Make sure you are not serving burnt coal )

• Dance for her (Salsa?)

• Play the guitar for her (\m/ Rocksta style)

• Write poetry for her (No corny hindi filmi songs please!)

• Take her for long walks (Not when the thermometer reads 40+ degrees or <10 Degrees)

• Pamper her (Pamper her means pamper her)

• Give her flowers (No cheapo junglee fools please!)

• Treat her like a Princess ( Most Important!)

Gals

How to make a Man fall in love with ya?

.

.

.

.

.

.

Just smile at him

Voila!

Hello Internet, Criggin Jankin here with today’s random hot chick. Today folks we take a gander at Meagan Good. 36/24/34 Born in Panoramic City, CA in 81 – making her legal and well versed…Megan is accustomed to the lime light and we are accustomed to seeing her. She is hired, and here are some samples why.

info via chicklipedia

Both  MP4 and MP3 downloads (MP4 downloads are below MP3 downloads)

MP3—–320 Kbps  & 128 Kbps

Click on the Download link,A new window opens up from where you can download

MP3 DOWNLOADS

(ROCKING HIGH QUALITY 320 Kbps & 44100Hz)

Hudugaata Aadi – Karthik

|download link 1|||||||||||||||||||download link 2|

Romeogalige – Josh, Benny, Blaze, Prashanth

|download link 1|||||||||||||||||||download link 2|

Tangali Tandeya – Benny

|download link 1|||||||||||||||||||download link 2|

Yaaro Kooda – Karthik, Benny

|download link 1|||||||||||||||||||download link 2|

Ondondu Storygu – Krishh, Harini, Suchitra

|download link 1|||||||||||||||||||download link 2|

Minchi Hoyitu – Vijay Shankar, Benny

|download link 1|||||||||||||||||||download link 2|

MP3 DOWNLOADS

(128 Kbps & 44100Hz)

Hudugaata Aadi – Karthik

Romeogalige – Josh, Benny, Blaze, Prashanth

Tangali Tandeya – Benny

Yaaro Kooda – Karthik, Benny

Ondondu Storygu – Krishh, Harini, Suchitra

Minchi Hoyitu – Vijay Shankar, Benny

MP4 DOWNLOADS

[ Songs around 1.5 MB especially for all mobile phones(music editions NOKIA),other higher end mobile phones which support MP4

Can be even used to play in Computers; preferably for those who want the songs to be of least size and no compromise with quality]

Hudugaata Aadi – Karthik

Romeogalige – Josh, Benny, Blaze, Prashanth

Tangali Tandeya – Benny

Yaaro Kooda – Karthik, Benny

Ondondu Storygu – Krishh, Harini, Suchitra

Minchi Hoyitu – Vijay Shankar, Benny

ನಿಮಗೆ ಈ ಹಾಡುಗಳು  ಇಷ್ಟವಾದಲ್ಲಿ , ದಯಮಾಡಿ ಈ ಚಿತ್ರದ ಹಾಡಿನ CD ಅಥವ DVD ಯನ್ನು ಕೊಂಡುಕೊಳ್ಳಿ.

ಕನ್ನಡ ಉಳಿಸಿ ಕನ್ನಡ ಬೆಳೆಸಿ

The songs listed in this web site are for information and promotion purpose only, if you like the songs, please BUY a CD or DVD from your nearest Audio Store

Buy Original ! Save Kannada Music

VIDEO DOWNLOADS

You will need a video player which plays almost all format songs to watch the videos.If you don’t have one in your system then download it from here.

Download Yaaru Kooda Ninna haage video.

     The Uncanny X-Men face off against their newest threat, the Sisterhood!  Lady Mastermind v. Emma Frost!  Chimera v. the Three-in-One!  And in the biggest fight of all, Wolverine v. Lady Deathstrike and… Revanche?  Okay, it’s actually Psylocke back in her proper body, except under the control of Madelyne Pryor.  And we all know that Wolverine is bad-ass, but under normal circumstances, he has trouble with Lady Deathstrike by herself, let alone alongside another, equally talented fighter.  At any rate, everything gets trashed out.  And it’s all done for the sole purpose of getting a lock of Jean Grey’s hair that Wolverine was keeping.  That’s not creepy at all. 

     I’m surprised that Matt Fraction could churn out such trash.  And I do mean that it’s trash.  This is possibly the worst issue of Fraction’s run for so many reasons.  First of all, there’s rampant mischaracterization.  Elixir is suddenly the Love Guru rather than a tortured child trying to balance his healing and killing sides.  The Three-in-One have suddenly regained their emotions, which I’m pretty sure were gone as of Phoenix: Warsong.  Emma Frost gets the worst line in the whole issue, with the crap about the maid with the common breeding.  Nightcrawler gets a Chris Claremont-esque “Mein Gott” in, Madelyne adds her name to the list of people who have misused the word “Zen,” and possessed- Psylocke uses another one of Fraction’s buzz words, “maggot,” yet again.  It’s all pretty bad, even considering Fraction’s genericization (I made up a word!) of the X-Men thus far. 

     Then there’s the art.  Greg Land has never been worse.  During Emma’s discussion with who I would assume to be Jean Grey, one panel has her lips looking like they’re full of collagen.  The Three-in-One look so exactly alike in one panel that it looks like the same image was just copied three times.  In one of the pictures of Cyclops in the school illusion world, he’s got Land’s trademark porn face on.  And in one panel, Lady Mastermind suddenly has brown hair.  Like she was her sister.  Speaking of which, where was Mastermind in this issue?  Lastly, I wish that everyone in Land’s art didn’t have the EXACT SAME SMILE.  It’s freaky looking, and it’s everywhere.  In summation, this issue was terrible.  It was an overextended fight sequence with loads of bad dialogue and very little actual plot development.  Why is Matt Fraction so good one minute and so bad the next?!

Plot: 5.7      Art: 3.9      Dialogue: 4.2      Overall: 4.6

A strange city. A forlorn heart. Bright sunshine. Cloudy moods. Impulsive beginnings. Magical moments. Heated passion. Frozen time.  For, he would do anything for a forever with her.

Her hair ran through his fingers like silk, smelling sweetly and evoking the most primal of instincts. Her eyes locked into his and spoke volumes about how they felt, without uttering a single word. Her lips, slightly parted, sported the eternal smile, mirroring his own. Her nose brushed against his, sending sparks of electricity coursing through his body. Her teeth bit into his shoulder, taking him to the border of pain and absolute pleasure. Her fingers interlocked his own, clutching each other tightly, a bond that neither time nor distance would break. Her voice said his name and he lost himself in her words. Her legs danced with his, a carnal dance of tease and love.

They stood there, in the center of the room, oblivious to the happenings in the outside world, and knowing nothing but each other, and not caring for anything but their love.

“What are you thinking?” she asked him softly and smiled. The smile that set his heart racing and the smile that made him stupid. The smile that made his smile instinctively and the smile that brought her full lips in a sensuous curve that sent his own lips in search of them. The smile that made his knees weak.

“I’m thinking about you,” he said. She tilted her head and let her hair fall across her face in waves. “What about?” she asked.

He brushed her lovely brown-black hair from her face, stared into her eyes and said, “I’ll miss you.”

She held her gaze and her smile and just nodded. “Me too.”

As he watched the ground recede below him and the flying monster lifted off, taking him away from her, he wiped a tear from his eye and smiled to himself. His whole life had been one major roller coaster, and she knew it. She recognized it. As he switched off his phone, he caught one last glimpse of her text message that read, “I love you..”

He wondered what she was thinking right now. He wondered what she thought about him. He wondered if she would ever tell him how she truly felt. He wondered if she’d ever let him in. He wondered…

Guru do Amor

Confesso que sou fã do Mike Myers. Acho geniais os dois ”Quanto mais idiota melhor” (“Wayne’s World”), sou fã da série “Austin Powers”, até gostei dele quando fez um papel sério em “Studio 54″. Talvez isso tenha me ajudado a gostar de um filme tão criticado como “Guru do Amor”.

A história fala do Guru Pitka, que veio da Índia, apesar de nascido nos EUA, e que quer entrar no mercado de auto-ajuda e ser um dia tão importante quanto Deepak Chopra.

Ok, confesso que muitas das piadas são bobas. Inclusive esse filme concorreu a vários prêmios Framboesa de Ouro de 2008, incluindo pior filme do ano. Mas, na minha opinião isso foi injusto. O filme tem os seus bons momentos. Heu achei algumas das piadas muito boas!

Um dos pontos positivos do filme é o elenco. Quem diria que o ex boy band Justin Timberlake, além da carreira musical de sucesso, ainda ia virar um ator de talento? Timberlake interpreta Jacques “Le Cock” Grande, jogador de hockey canadense, rival do personagem que o Guru Pitka tem que ajudar. Todas as cenas onde ele aparece são hilárias! E não é só isso, além dele, ainda temos o grande Ben Kingsley interpretando um velho guru vesgo, numa piada referencial aos tempos de “Gandhi”, que lhe rendeu o Oscar de melhor ator em 83! E, de quebra, Verne Troyer, o anão Mini Me de “Austin Powers” faz o técnico do time de hockey. E o elenco ainda conta com as belas curvas de Jessica Alba… Isso sem contar com um monte de celebridades interpretando a si mesmos - incluindo Mariska Hargitay, da série “Law and Order – SVU”, que participa de uma genial “piada interna”, logo no início do filme…

E, pra quem entrar na onda do filme, alguns números musicais são muito engraçados, incluindo uma coreografia bollywoodiana no fim do filme!

Bem, não é pra qualquer público. Mas os bem-humorados vão apreciar!

“Why don’t you write about us, honey?” said the girl.

“Write what?” said the guy.

“Well, you know… About us… About our little love story.”

“Let me think about it. I don’t know what to write, babe.”

He hung up the phone and stared at his computer. His inbox was open and every minute or so, an email popped in, increasing the count of unread mails. He looked around him, and thought back on the past few days and smiled. It was so strange, he thought, that this girl has had so much effect on him in so little a time. He just couldn’t stop thinking about her.

He knew there was little he could do to avoid the slippery slopes of love if he ever got into it, but deep down, he also knew that no matter what happened between the two of them, they would always remain the best of friends; whether their relationship would remain platonic or not, he knew that she had become, and would remain, an integral part of his life. Forever.

He thought about what to write. He wanted to say so many things to her, but didn’t know quite how to put it. He was one who never minced words and she was one who never backed out of a challenge, and they had started out as an intellectual chat online, which had progressed into the what boring couples call the ‘dangerous territory’. He bit his lip when he thought of all those conversations they’d had, which could turn on anyone. He felt a stirring within him even as he thought about her, and to his shock, realized that he was red in the face.

He locked his computer and went into the bathroom, splashed cold water into his face and leaned against the sink, staring at himself in the mirror. “You are an idiot,” he said, mirroring her words from yesterday. “Do you even know what you’re doing?”

Somewhere, a voice answered, “Hey, hurry up in there! I gotta pee!”

As he came back to his desk, he walked slowly and his mind kept thinking about what he could write for her. Should he write about those tiny little mushy things he wanted to say to her all the time? Should he write about how sexy her voice was? Should he write about how much he wanted to be there with her, every second of the day? Should he write about how much he waited for her call? Should he write about how, each time she called and each time he heard her voice, he felt weak in his knees and just wanted to smile into the phone and not talk and just listen to her? Oh, there were so many things he wanted to write that he didn’t know where to start.

As he opened up his word editor and started writing from the beginning, somehow he felt angry at himself. He wished he could write better than he did. He wished his vocabulary had just a few words more to describe her. He wished he could do justice to the feelings he had for her. He wished he could do something to make her smile every minute of every day. He wished he could hear her voice for the rest of his life. He wished he wasn’t so miserably stuck in putting his thoughts down on paper.

The written word can be meaningful and deep and hurtful, but it can can never fill in the void. He craved for her to fill in the chasm in his heart, and at the same time, he desperately wanted not to hurt anyone in the process, least of all, hurt her. He decided not to write their love story.

“Some things,” he told her later, “are not meant to be shared with the world, sweetheart.”

Clive Ridgway is a singer/songwriter most well known for his work with Jonathan Butler, being part of the country-western group “Rocking Horse” (who performed alongside such artists as Laura Branigan and Smokie) and also for  being the programming manager of 94.5 Kfm, Cape Town’s biggest radio station. One day a bunch of us were standing around idly* discussing music and Clive happened to wander by. He stopped and listened to our conversation for a while. Then he said, “Do you know which songs last forever? The ballads. Other hits may come and go but a really good ballad lasts forever.”

Those words have stuck with me since then. No, I didn’t go out and pursue a career in songwriting. I did, however, take a closer look at ballads. They’re about people, relationships, emotions, honesty… Cheesy? Maybe. But the most powerful copy has always been something that speaks to the reader on an emotional level. Write copy that speaks honestly to your audience about the things that matter to them. Make them laugh or make them cry – and you’ll make them remember you.

Thanks for the advice, Clive.

A little something extra: From the Razzie-award winning “The Love Guru”, here’s Mike Myers and Manu Narayan performing an excerpt from “More than Words” (originally done by Extreme & a song that’s about more than its lyrics say).

* As we did very often. Well me anyway.

Na noite de 21 para 22 de Fevereiro foram entregues no Barnsdall Gallery Theatre em Hollywood pela 29ª vez os prémios Razzie para os piores filmes do ano da indústria norte-americana. Alguns pesos pesados como Uwe Boll e Paris Hilton fizeram valer a sua experiência nestas andanças e sairam os grandes vencedores da noite. A resposta alemã a Ed Wood, na opinião do júri, nomeado para 4 estatuetas acabou por levar para além do prémio carreira a mais cobiçada, a de pior realizador, a provar que à terceira é de vez, depois de ter sido nomeado 2 vezes em anos anteriores por Alone In The Dark e Bloodrayne, desta feita nomeado por 3 filmes ao mesmo tempo (Tunnel Rats, Postal e In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale) não deu hipóteses à concorrência. Paris Hilton que em 2006 levou para casa a estatueta de pior actriz secundária desta vez fez o pleno e ganhou 3 prémios repetindo o de pior actriz secundária e juntando-lhe o de pior actriz e de pior casal no ecrã.

Destaque ainda para The Love Guru que arrecadou para além de pior filme, o pior actor Mike Myers e o pior argumento. A pior sequela ficou entregue este ano a Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

O grande derrotado da noite acabou por ser The Happening de M. Night Shyamalan que não conseguiu vencer nenhum dos 4 prémios para que estava nomeado.

Fica aqui a lista completa dos nomeados e vencedores desta 29ª gala dos prémios Razzie e a já esperada resposta de Uwe Boll aos críticos.

A hilarious comedy starring Mike Myers as guru Pitka in his first original character since the blockbuster hit Austin Powers. Myers plays an American raised in India by gurus (Tugginmypudha & Satchabigknoba) and returns to the U.S. in order to break into the self-help business. His unorthodox methods are put to the test when he must settle the romantic troubles and subsequent professional skid of a star hockey player (Romany Malco), whose wife left him for a rival athlete Jacques Grande (Justin Timberlake). Mini Me is back from Austin Powers and plays the hockey coach for more classic comedic moments that will have audiences laughing from opening to closing credits.

Mike Myers, creator of Wayne’s World and Austin Powers, adds another character to his arsenal of comic personae. With his thick beard, curly mustachios, and easy-to-remember aphorisms, Guru Pitka (Myers) has built a reputation as love advisor par excellence–but he’s still just America’s #2 guru, after Deepak Chopra. Finally an opportunity comes his way: If he can heal the rift between a star hockey player (Romany Marco, Weeds) and his wife (Meagan Good, Stomp the Yard), he can appear on Oprah. But when he meets the hockey team’s comely owner (Jessica Alba), Pitka realizes he must solve his own love problems as well. Myers can’t resist a good bodily functions joke–unfortunately, he can’t resist a bad one either, so The Love Guru is crammed top to bottom with jokes about urine, feces, sex, genitalia–lots and lots about male genitalia–along with many, many gags about Canada, drugs, elephants, inspirational catchphrases, and little people (Vern “Mini-Me” Troyer takes the brunt of these). But the Austin Powers movies were pretty much the same sort of lowbrow comedy grab-bag; though the ratio of good to bad might be weaker here, a good handful of bits offer solid laughs, including some mock-Bollywood musical numbers. Also featuring pop star Justin Timberlake (as a preposterously well-endowed French-Canadian), Ben Kingsley (as Pitka’s cross-eyed mentor), Stephen Colbert (as a drug-addled sports announcer), as well as numerous celebrity cameos. –Bret Fetzer

The Love Guru (Single-Disc Edition) is available at Amazon for $19.99. To Order click here
Amazon Product Pages contain a lot of other details on this product as Customer Reviews, Sales Ranking, Special Offers, Alternate products that customers are going for and much more.Want to read these details? click here

Want to get some other Format / Binding / Version? You can search for them from here

Other Products of Interest

• Baby Mama
• Get Smart (Single-Disc Widescreen Edition)
• Forgetting Sarah Marshall (Unrated Widescreen Edition)
• You Don’t Mess With the Zohan (Unrated Single-Disc Edition)
• Tropic Thunder

A young man moves to L.A. to track down the woman he’s been in love with since childhood, only to discover that his plan to woo her only has one hurdle to overcome: what to do with her ever-present, not-so-hot best friend

Celebutante Paris Hilton takes on leading lady status in this fluffy comedy about the mysteries of love, and the importance of orthodontia. Nate Cooper (Joel David Moore) is an unfeeling commitment “challenged” lemon. His fed-up girlfriend runs out on him and he�s just about hit rock bottom. Haunted by his childhood, he can�t seem to get over his kindergarten crush with the cutest girl at school, Christabel Abbot (Paris Hilton). Unable to move forward in love and life, Nate decides to track down Christabel, hoping to unlock the key to his future. As luck and movie magic would have it, Christabel has blossomed into LA�s hottest blonde who’s miraculously single. Unavoidably however, there�s a catch: she�s still playing guardian to childhood best friend and physically cursed June Phigg (Christine Lakin) and has made a solemn vow of chastity until June has a boyfriend of her own. Considering June�s sad and highly exaggerated state of affairs (e.g. rotting teeth, whiskers, etc.), Nate is faced with a daunting task. As his hare-brained schemes to find June an appropriate suitor evolve, she begins to undergo an extreme inner and outer transformation. When her teeth are whitened and the moles and whiskers are removed to reveal a Hollywood actress-like allure, Nate “suddenly” has an unobstructed view of her “inner beauty” and in an epiphanic moment realizes that love and destiny are pretty confusing things. Lacking verisimilitude and plagued with gross-out jokes, spotty direction, and an underwritten script, much of the film plays out like Farrelly brothers’ sloppy seconds. Nonetheless, there�s plenty of silliness, some good laughs, and a very willing cast who is more than up to playing along, most notably the talented Lakin and Moore. Hilton fans can rejoice in knowing that within the limited confines of the script, she aptly holds her own and when given the chance, has comedy potential. All in all The Hottie and the Nottie is a modest ultralight romantic comedy that though forgettable, is not without its charms. Neither a Hottie nor a Nottie, let�s just call this a Middle-of-the-Roadie. – Matt Wold

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Other Products of Interest

• Fool’s Gold (Widescreen Edition)
• P.S. I Love You
• Over Her Dead Body
• 27 Dresses (Widescreen Edition)
• Juno (Single-Disc Edition)

Como lo pueden apreciar en la foto de “1 x Día“, hoy todo es Oscar.
Prontos para arrancar la maratón televisiva del Oscar 2009.
Por ser el 3er año de los Oscar en el BatiMariolo, esta vez el resultado completo estará a minutos de terminar la ceremonia. Iremos escribiendo el post y cuando sepamos el último galardón, el de Mejor Película, enseguida quedará publicado el artículo.

Para uds, amigas, vean una imagen de los ensayos para esta noche

Bueno, dejemos al amigo Hugh con sus ensayos, esperemos que lo haga bien, y vayamos a una de las antesalas más esperadas cada año, la “premiación” (es un decir) a lo peor del año, conocido como …

Los Razzies 2009

Peor Película
‘El gurú del amor’ (The Love Guru), dirigida por Marco Schnabel)
Peor Actor:
Mike Myers, The Love Guru     y si, me tiene paspado ya.
Peor Actress:
Paris Hilton, THE HOTTIE AND THE NOTTIE  y no se da por vencida la tipa
Peor actriz de reparto:
Paris Hilton, REPO: THE GENETIC OPERA
Peor Actor de Reparto:
Pierce Brosnan, MAMMA MIA!   que hdp que son, jajaja, pobre amigo Pierce
Peor pareja en pantalla:
Paris Hilton y cualquiera: Christin Lakin o Joel David Moore, THE HOTTIE AND THE NOTTIE  no acepto laburar con ella ni empedo
PEOR PRECUELA, REMAKE, TOMADURA DE PELO O SECUELA
Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of The Crystal Skull   otra hijaputez de los tipos, jajaja
Peor Director:
Uwe Boll, ‘1968: Tunnel Rats’, ‘En el nombre del Rey’ (In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale) y una postal de Uwe Boll
Peor Guión:
The Love Guru, escrito por Mike Myers & Graham Gordy
La peor carrera:
Uwe Boll (respuesta germana a Ed Wood)  jajaja, lo comparan con Ed Wood, si será malo, jajaja

Decíamos, también, que se entregaron los Spirit Award.
En esta edición de los Independent Spirit Awards no luchaba por galardón alguno ‘Slumdog Millionaire’, así que ….
Sin embargo, los que sí estaban compitiendo eran algunos de los que se vestirán esta noche en el Kodak Theatre de smoking y traje de noche.
La gran triunfadora de anoche fue ‘El Luchador’ (película que para mi, Mariolo, es la mayor competidora esta noche, de lo mejor del año), con tres ISA, mejor película, mejor actor principal para Mickey Rourke y mejor fotografía. El discurso de Rourke fue uno de los momentos ‘punta’ de la noche, haciendo de ‘manager’ de su querido amigo Eric Roberts (hermano de Julia, pero siempre en la mala), pidiendo que le den la misma oportunidad que a él para ‘resucitar’, aunque luego lo remató diciendo que posiblemente a Eric le arrestarían antes de que acabara la noche… jajaja

Lista Completa:
Premio John Cassavetes, otorgado a la mejor película realizada con menos de 500.000 dólares: ‘Buscando un Beso a Medianoche’ de Alex Holdridge.
Premio revelación: Lynn Shelton por ‘My Effortless Brilliance’.
Premio ‘Truer Than Fiction’ al mejor documental sin distribución: ‘The Order of Myths’ de Margaret Brown.
Premio Piaget al mejor productor: Heather Ray por ‘Frozen River’.
Premio Robert Altman al mejor reparto: ‘Synecdoche’, New York.
Mejor película: ‘El Luchador’ de Darren Aronofsky.
Mejor director: Thomas McCarthy por ‘The Visitor’.
Mejor actor: Mickey Rourke por ‘El Luchador’.
Mejor actriz: Melissa Leo por ‘Frozen River’.
Mejor actor de reparto: James Franco por ‘Mi Nombre es Harvey Milk’. no entiendo por qué no está nominado al Oscar (¿muchos personajes de gays acaso?, cuanta homofobia …)
Mejor actriz de reparto: Penélope Cruz por ‘Vicky Cristina Barcelona’.
Mejor guión: ‘Vicky Cristina Barcelona’ de Woody Allen
Mejor ópera prima: ‘Synecdoche’, New York de Charlie Kaufman.
Mejor primer guión: ‘Mi Nombre es Harvey Milk’ de Dustin Lance Black.
Mejor documental: ‘Man on Wire’ de James Marsh.
Mejor película extranjera: ‘La Clase’ de Laurent Cantet.
Mejor fotografía: ‘El Luchador’ de Maryse Alberti.

Datos de Tu Blog de Cine

1년에 몇번 안 열릴것같던 Cine BBS가 한번더 문을 열었다.

이번에 상영한 영화는 특별히 DJ soulscape의 추천으로

선택된 Love Guru라는 영화인데 오랜만에 꺌꺌 거리면서

즐겁게 웃으며 볼 수 있어 매우 좋았다.

다시한번 마이크 마이어스를 존경하는 마음을 갖게되는

아주 funky한 영화이다.평점:★★★★☆

good god.  i don’t know what came over me yesterday, but i was exchanging emails with my mother, and mentioned vegas, and casually segued into “he’s been around 4 months, i guess you should meet him.  can i make us all dinner one night?”

jesus.  then she writes back, in shock i’m sure, that they can do monday.  monday.  MONDAY!

vegas is meeting my mom on monday.  dear lord. 

now, i’ve met his parents 3 times.  but, he was “pro meeting the parents” from 3 weeks in.  and i can see why.  his parents are nice.  i was instantly comfortable.

ok, that may not be SO fair.  my mom went thru a tremendous amount as a single mother and now that she is happily married, and we are all out of the house, she fancies herself a little bit of a love guru.  which is very irritating. 

and to be 100% honest, i resent her for not flying out to texas the minute she found out what my ex did.  i know i was a grown up then, as i am now, but i was scared and alone, and i needed my mother.  and she didn’t come.  she is also the only person my ex still contacts about little things still being processed in the divorce and it is always uncomfortable when they come up.  that is to be expected.  what isn’t expected or appreciated is when she says things like “you know, he can really be pretty wonderful” in regards to my ex.  no, he isn’t.  wonderful people don’t abuse the people they “love.”  a wonderful person wouldn’t hurt your daughter.

needless to say, my relationship with my mother has been strained in the 2 years i’ve been back.  when she calls, i often ignore it, bc i don’t know what kind of conversation it is gonna be.  if it is going to be accusatory or upsetting or just a call to see what i’m up to. 

and now she’s going to meet the first man i’ve really cared about since, and i’m terrified.  my sister doesn’t get it, bc my sister doesn’t know everything.  then again, my mom doesn’t know everything either.  why would i tell them?  after they said that i should keep “giving counseling a chance.”  i didn’t want to go into detail and make them understand.  it was horrible enough once.

i walked away with post traumatic stress disorder, a perpetual migraine, sleeping and anxiety disorders.  and i still feel lucky that i’m kinda ok.  i’m trying to move forward, and trying to be happy.

the reality of it is that it is me.  it is me that has the issues introducing vegas to family.  mostly bc it means i’m ready to do “family like things.”  i don’t mean like move in or get a pet or anything.  but little things.  share weekends, take my nephews to the movies, make plans.  making plans for months in advance.  because i feel like he’ll be around.  because family always is.

geez, this blog got away from me.