Lyrics :

Trouble he will find you no matter where you go, oh oh
No matter if you’re fast, no matter if you’re slow, oh oh
The eye of the storm or the cry in the mourn, oh oh
You’re fine for a while but you start to lose control

He’s there in the dark, he’s there in my heart
He waits in the wings, he’s gotta play a part
Trouble is a friend, yeah trouble is a friend of mine, oh oh!

Trouble is a friend but trouble is a foe, oh oh
And no matter what I feed him he always seems to grow, oh oh
He sees what I see and he knows what I know, oh oh
So don’t forget as you ease on down the road

He’s there in the dark, he’s there in my heart
He waits in the wings, he’s gotta play a part
Trouble is a friend, yeah trouble is a friend of mine, oh oh

So don’t be alarmed if he takes you by the arm
I won’t let him win, but I’m a sucker for his charm
Trouble is a friend, yeah trouble is a friend of mine, oh oh!

Oh how I hate the way he makes me feel
And how I try to make him leave, I try
Oh oh, I try!

He’s there in the dark, he’s there in my heart
He waits in the wings, he’s gotta play a part
Trouble is a friend, yeah trouble is a friend of mine, oh oh

So don’t be alarmed if he takes you by the arm
I won’t let him win, but I’m a sucker for his charm
Trouble is a friend, yeah trouble is a friend of mine, oh oh!
Ooo, oh ooo, ooo ahh

Lyrics :

When marimba rhythms start to play
Dance with me, make me sway
Like a lazy ocean hugs the shore
Hold me close, sway me more

Like a flower bending in the breeze
Bend with me, sway with ease
When we dance you have a way with me
Stay with me, sway with me

Other dancers may be on the floor
Dear, but my eyes will see only you
Only you have that magic technique
When we sway I go weak

I can hear the sounds of violins
Long before it begins
Make me thrill as only you know how
Sway me smooth, sway me now

Sway me, make me
Thrill me, hold me
Bend me, ease me
You have a way with me

Sway with me
Sway (sway) (Sway)

Other dancers may be on the floor
Dear, but my eyes will see only you
Only you have that magic technique
When we sway I go weak
I go weak

I can hear the sounds of violins
Long before it begins
Make me thrill as only you know how
Sway me smooth, sway me now
Make me thrill as only you know how
Sway me smooth, sway me now
Make me thrill as only you know how
Sway me smooth, sway me now
Sway me
Sway me
Sway me now

” मन की ओस की गर्म बुँदे “

I didn’t have a clue
I never thought this could come true
Sit back and close your eyes
And let me paint this picture for you
It has been some time now
I let my inside dry up and dwindle in despair
Hoping that tomorrow
He will be there
I feel the beats and the pounding
Like a drum in a band
I can’t help but wonder
Has God finished completing
‘”that” Man
I know I have no place
But you can tell by the look on my face
That there’s an empty space
Everyday there’s a race
And I’m weary from the chase
And not one of them had “that” face
Those eyes that would see clean through to my soul
And give light to that place
That has now become a black hole
While my days come and nights go by
I know all that I have come to believe can’t be a lie
Have I asked for too much?
Are my standards too high?
If your answer to me is No…..
Then my question is why?
There is no answer
This question has been plaguing me like a cancer
And still
There is no answer
Just when I decided
I would just let it go
A door opened
And wouldn’t you know
At first glance
I knew this meeting was not by chance
It played out like a silent movie from France
No words were being spoken
Not even a sound
Our souls knew
They had been found
See physically we weren’t in the conversation
OMG what a sensation
Intertwined his soul and mine
Thank you Jesus ….lol…it’s about time
So for the first time I take a chance
And follow my heart
The whole while my head is saying
That’s not smart
But this is different
It’s a joy I can’t fully explain
Our connection is so deep
or am I going insane
Seeing the love he has for me
Through his eyes
Let’s me know everything my head has been telling me
Has all been lies
I took mental notes
I left myself open
Hoping, Wishing, Praying
God would finish completing “that” Man
And all the while it was written in his plans
Because
Right before my eyes
Here he stands

“that” Man!

有些話我選擇保持沉默
別把實話說破　隱藏我的寂寞
妳的情緒依然把我牽動
躲在妳心中　角落的心事我能懂

就算妳的愛　屬於他了
就算妳的手　他還牽著
就算妳累了　我會在這

一人留　兩人疚　三人遊
悄悄的　遠遠的　或許捨不得
默默的　靜靜的　或許很值得
我還在某處守候著　說不定這也是一種　幸福的資格
至少我們中還有人能快樂　這樣就已足夠了

不知道　不知道　不知道
為什麼　為什麼　我的愛
我的愛還留不住妳的離開　卻總在　等待著妳回來 :. )

五年前的我說：”我係一個好懶既人，不過我會好努力去記住所有開心既嘢。” 來到今天，我記得到底有幾多? 

P.S. I really HATE washing clothes on Sundays, it ruins my mood for the coming week.

count love songs down, my heart become pinker

we come to near-half way, scent of love become stronger, from 80-61, larger amount of singles sound fantastic to me. most recommend such as track no# 79, 78,75,,71,70 67 and 65.And right to my heart is track no# 75 from Souther All Stars

080. I for You (LUNA SEA)

073. もう君以外愛せない (KinKi Kids)

071. Together (EXILE)

070. あなたのキスを数えましょう 〜You were mine〜 (小柳 ゆき)

066. はじまりはいつも雨 (ASKA)

065. 雪の華 (中島 美嘉)

064. 恋心 (相川 七瀬)

Bradley Joseph is a musician that has toured with Yanni.

He is a featured keyboardist in the Live At The Acropolis DVD and toured with Yanni during the Ethnicity 2003 World Tour.

Bradley has been very busy creating his own music. Below is a list of his CDs, if you would like to listen to some of the selections got to:

www.bradleyjoseph.com/cds.cfm

Solo Journey

Eleven original piano pieces designed for relaxing, reflecting, and healing

The Journey Continues

Soft piano to calm, compose and renew

Piano Love Songs

Soft classic love songs performed on the piano

Suites and Sweets

Relaxing classical music on the piano

One Deep Breath

Moods, Memories, Dreams

Rapture

Intimate piano pieces, quartets and full orchestrations, this CD sounds lush and romantic

For The Love Of It

Piano with soft rhythms and orchestrations

Hear The Masses

An upbeat and energetic CD

Classic Christmas

Christmas classics performed on the piano

Christmas Around The World

Unique Christmas songs that are famous in countries around the world and arranged by Bradley

Hymns & Spiritual Songs

Inspirational songs performed on the piano with soft orchestra

Pet Series – CDs and DVDs

Relaxing video and soothing sounds for your pets

Some quite Loveable Duets

[More to come as the week is coming to an end - Again from Thursday to Thursday, this is List I - Let's Talk About Love]

Since Abigail was born still certain music has had a very special place in my heart.  It was hard to plan a funeral service for a baby that we never got to know, or even meet, but songs helped to express what we were feeling on that special day.  And, in the months that followed I kept coming across new songs which made me think about my beautiful baby daughter and how much I missed her.

More recently, I made a playlist of songs that spoke to me about Abigail as a gift for my lovely wife.  This was a good way to honour both of the special girls in my life.

Around the first anniversary of Abigail’s death I felt so much emotion but not the release of tears.  It was music once again that broke through my emotional reserves as I eventually sobbed my heart out listening to one particular song.

Anyway, I thought I would share here some of the special music that reminds me of Abigail.  Since the web is not as joined up as it should be, you might not be able to play all the music linked here.  If so hopefully a quick internet search will bring you somewhere where you can hear them or failing that, try spotify or youtube.  If I have already posted on this blog about a song I will link to that otherwise I will try and find a version online.

Songs about stillbirth

Some songs that seem to me to be about stillbirth or the loss of a child include:

- Still by Gerrit Hofsink is perhaps the most powerful song about stillbirth specifically – “Lost you before I found you, gone before you came, but I love you just the same.  Missed you before I met you, on earth we never can, but in heaven we’ll meet again.”  You can read the lyrics here along with a youtube video of the song.  Thanks to Sian for first introducing me to this song

- Heaven is the face by Steve Curtis Chapman – I love this song and also With Hope and Beauty will Rise by the same grieving father.  I happily recommend the whole album in fact.

- A little more of you by Ashley Chambliss is a recent discovery for me – thanks to In the land of Broken Hearts

- Daughter of heaven by Kate Rusby

- Gone too soon by Michael Jackson also seems very appropriate for a grieving parent but I am not sure if that is what it was originally about

- I will take you hope by the Grateful Dead of all people

- Somewhere over the rainbow always reminds me of heaven

Some love songs (which still do it for me)

Two songs by snow patrol which I only discovered recently include the haunting lyrics of Chasing Cars and the rising anthem of Run.

High by Lighthouse Family was a song we very nearly had at Abigail’s funeral but in the end we went for Friends by Michael W Smith, mainly for the first few lines “packing up the dreams God planted, in the fertile soil of you.  I can’t believe the hopes he’d granted, now a chapter in our lives is through.  But we’ll keep you close as always”.  I can’t bring myself to type the next line because it isn’t even remotely true!

I will always love you by Whitney Houston reduced me to an emotional pulp a few months after Abigail died when it came on the ipod on random shuffle.  I had a similar response to One more day by Diamond Rio – forgive the video! 

Unchained Melody by Righteous Brothers is another love song that is now forever about Abigail.  As is Without you by Dixie Chicks and 20 Good Reasons by Thirsty Merc.

The current ringtone on my mobile is Sweet Child O’Mine by Guns and Roses – just the guitar solo at the start – still no one had picked up on the relevance.

Heaven by Live is another song which has Abigail written all over it for me.

Annie’s song by John Denver is a song that I sometimes listen to when I climb the hill where we scattered Abigail’s ashes.  Another such song is Go rest high on this mountain by Vince Gill or To where you are sung by Josh Groban

A Father’s love song for his daughter which reminded me of all the potential lost when Abigail died and also spoke of our ongoing infertility troubles is Cinderella.

Christian worship songs

The old children’s song Jesus loves me seems very appropriate for Abigail – risk searching youtube at your peril for this one.

As high as the heavens (voice of hope) – a song pointed out to be by Andthroughthestorm who had this song at the thanksgiving service for their daughter Abi.

A song by Matt and Beth Redman (who have had three miscarriages) is Blessed be your name. Also by Matt Redman is You never let go, a song based on Psalm 23.  Also further down in the same link is At the foot of the cross (Beauty for ashes) which helped me to start thinking about looking for beauty and God in our grief.

Two songs which we sang at Abigail’s funeral were How deep the Father’s love for us (which speaks about how God was himself a bereaved parent) and God of Grace (I stand complete in you) which includes the line “strivings and all anguished dreams in rags lie at my feet, but only grace provides the way for me to stand complete.”  A song played at the end of Abigail’s funeral was There is a Day which I absolutely love as it has such hope in it.

More recently I came across Jesus, draw me ever nearer by Keith and Kristyn Getty which spoke to me about letting God into my grief.

So as you can see quite a lot of songs have really touched me over the past 14 months.

What songs have really impacted you during your journey of grief?

(for a similar post on stillbirth poems click here)

This will be Erin Drummond’s second time at the Cabaret, having performed in “Love Songs” by David DeBlieck earlier this fall as part of our recurring Kinetic Kitchen series. But her dance career stretches back much further, having begun at the tender age of eight when she took a ballet class because her best friend Laura wanted to take it. (Hey, that sounds like how I got into Doctor Who…) Her work is constantly evolving; one interest that currently drives her work is the body’s sensorial relationship to place: “there is a split second lag between the energy field around your body and the electrical activity in your brain.  We sense the world before we process it on a cerebral level, and this fascinates me.  I am interested in the forms, movements, energies, and qualities that can emerge from a sensorial exploration- even with the very air, movement of our blood, and resonance of our bones- before the thinking mind gets involved.  I nurture this connection by using an intuitive form of directing in the rehearsal process, and then refining the work from there.” Erin is also interested in how a dance formed in interaction with one place is changed when transplanted into another, as it will be this weekend when “Laoi na Mn Mora” (which grew out of reciprocity with the sea) comes to the indoor performance space of Patrick’s Cabaret. 

Erin has had the opportunity to investigate these interests in many different locations. In 2004 she was study abroad in Samoa and interviewing local Samoans about their experiences with aitu (spirits) and as the culmination of the project, she put together a performance piece integrating local legends and dance with her own performative voice, entitled “My Ancestor is a Cloud.”    In 2007, a composer friend of hers who was working for a dance/theater company in Bangkok invited her to come work on a project commissioned by the UN.  She remembers many of the UN delegates insisting that the dance performance should not be included in their ceremony, because the issues were “too important for art,” whereupon Angh, the woman largely responsible for starting  the commission, replied, “these issues are so important, we need every avenue possible to explore them!”  This was a moment that greatly inspired Erin, and after seeing the devastation of the recent tsunamis in Southeast Asia and Samoa, she says she is further impassioned in the exploration of artistic forms- esp. through relationship with place- as an invaluable way to tune into otherwise unseen possibilities for the climate, earth, and ourselves.

I think I’ll let her close this out: “As much as I may try to describe my work in words, the life of it is in the thing itself.” To see the life of the thing, head down to Patrick’s Cabaret Friday or Saturday. Have fun!

聊天 是甜蜜的習慣 把心情都交換 一天才算完
簡單 是我要的浪漫 你語氣有心疼 我就更勇敢
我今天 我明天 最想環遊的世界
就是你 最內心 的世界

As always, really, but sometimes it makes me feel irrelevant. I mean, what could be more trite and worn than a love song? Aren’t there more important things to discuss?
Today, walking past the cemetery, I saw all the dead rise and stand on their graves as they were in youth, at my age, rows and rows stretching all the way back out of sight and it occurred to me that nothing is more important than love, really. I can write about love because I have seen my inevitable death and forgetting, maybe even the latter before the former, and there’s no need to feign ignorance. There’s no need to pretend to be immortal. There is a need to sing songs about pretty girls because pretty girls make you feel alive while you are alive, and there’s plenty to be said for that.

The classic boy meets girl love story is hardly the invention of humans.

Just ask our friends in the animal kingdom, who have certainly perfected the art of romance. From the love songs of the Mexican free-tailed bat to the dangerous, seductive dance of redback spiders, the language of love is loud and clear in the animal world.

Source:
http://webecoist.com/2009/11/15/language-of-love-unique-animal-mating-habits/

其實有時覺得，我才是最虛偽的那一個。

機會率是多麼令人頹喪，但我不想相信決定論。

上天沒有所謂註定不註定，”偶然”是我們一個個編出來的爛透謊話，僅此而已。

Tonight I saw a shooting star
Made me wonder where you are
For years I have been dreaming of you
And I wonder if you’re thinking of me too
In this world of cheap romance
And love that only fades after the dance
They say that i’m a fool to wait for something more
How can I really love someone i’ve never seen before
But I have longed for true love every day that I have lived
And I know that real love is all about learning how to give
So I pray that god will bring you to me
And I pray you’ll find me waiting faithfully

Faithfully, I am yours
From now until forever
Faithfully, I will write
Write you a love song with my life
Cause this kind of loves worth waiting for
No matter how long it takes I am yours
Faithfully

Tonight I saw two lovers kiss
Reminded me of my own loneliness
They say that i’m a fool to keep on praying for you
How can I give up pleasure for a dream that won’t come true
But I will keep believing that god still has a plan
And though I can’t see you now,
I know that he can
And someday I will give you all of me
Until I find you, i’ll be waiting faithfully

Faithfully, I am yours
From now until forever
Faithfully, I will write
Write you a love song with my life
Cause this kind of loves worth waiting for
No matter how long it takes I am yours
Faithfully