A little story for the Halloween season.

I had been hired to work in one of the three haunted houses for Halloween, and the one I liked best was the “dungeon of doom”.  I saw Clark long before I met him.  He had silky light brown hair, the kind with long bangs that framed his face and occasionally had to be brushed out of his light blue eyes. I was looking at a snapshot from our time together after “dungeon of doom.”

The dungeon’s theatrics depicted men who were brought before a judge who then condemned them to death by torture and execution.  Last year’s theme was a house that played out all the deaths in the works of Edgar Allan Poe.  The company decided to save a bit of money be making small changes to the set from last year.

I had enjoyed last year’s theme a great deal and particularly savored the scene from the Pit and the Pendulum where a man was left to be sliced in half by a large steel blade.  However, the company wanted to remain true to the story and so the scenes aimed for accuracy.  The male victim was dirty, dressed in rags, and rescued at the end.  I was hoping that we as an audience would get to watch as the pendulum blade cut him in half.  I had always been turned on by the thought of seeing a man severed in half or being in his place myself.

Though the Pit and the Pendulum scene left me horny and yearning for a handsome man in peril, I was very attracted to the man from the Cask of Amontillado scene.  I first noticed his bright blue eyes as he looked at the audience pleading for his life.  His light blue eyes locked onto mine and I felt myself become aroused as I watched him struggle in a sexy renaissance costume while he maintained a heroic effort to escape the chains and shackles that restrained his wrists and ankles as men mortared the bricks into place.  As soon as the last brick was put into place we were hurried onwards to watch the Fall of the House of Usher, but I couldn’t get the image of that handsome man in chains out of my head.  I wanted to ask more about him, but the guides were in character and would only answer questions about the characters in the story and not about the actors portraying them.  The whole past year I kept fantasizing about him dressed in that renaissance costume, restrained in shackles, being sliced in half at the waist by the pendulum blade instead of the other guy dressed in rags.

On my first visit to the “dungeon of doom” we were told of the basic premise for the house we were working.  There were six male prisoners who were brought before the judge in the first scene.  The scene took only 15 minutes as the judge was told their crime and pronounced a fitting method of torture or execution for each of the condemned.  The audience then entered into the actual dungeon to watch each of the condemned men meet their horrible ends one at a time.  All actors were shadowing other parts, meaning that we’d be playing multiple roles in case one of the actors was sick or had a conflict. I was shadowing the part of a young lordling who was convicted of piracy and sodomy.  However, I was hired to be the replacement player for the part of the young pirate lord’s executioner on an everyday basis.

We were told to watch our counterparts as they went through their trial and torture or execution.  The young lord was the third to be tried.  He was dressed in the same doublet and boots as the man from the Cask of Amontillado scene last year.  My heart beat hard in my chest as I slowly realized that the man I had been dreaming about for the past year was back this year in the part of the lordling!  I was a bit distracted but I heard the judge say:  “You shall be put to death by saw for your crimes of piracy and sodomy.  Let him be placed under the saw, severed in half at the waist, and left completely divided.”  My heart beat wildly in my chest at the announcement of his sentence.  It felt like an hour had passed until we were allowed into the dungeon and I could watch my handsome pirate suffer his terrible fate.

We had gone through the nearly the entire dungeon and had witnessed a breaking on the rack, torture with hot pokers, the iron maiden, a hanging, and a beheading by axe before we got to the grand finale of the sawing.  The last room featured a wooden table that had been divided into two uneven portions.  At the center cut of the table were dark brown and red bloodstains from previous victims of the saw.  The table also featured four steel shackles that were bolted down to the table near the four corners.  Two men in leather opened the steel restraints.  The metal restraints gleamed in the light with open, yearning smiles that desired nothing more than to snap shut tightly on the wrists and ankles of another helpless victim.

My reverie was abruptly halted by shouting and sounds of men struggling.  The pirate lord was brought out struggling against his captors.  A third man in leather slapped the pirate lord in the face, stunning him.  He proceeded to unlace the front of the pirate lord’s doublet and remove the beautiful black suede and gold silk brocade garment with a sadistic pleasure. He threw it to the beggars who greedily carried it off.  The young pirate lord was dressed in a light yellow, satin pirate shirt with an open chest and very blousy sleeves that fell to tightly gathered cuffs around his wrists; wrists that were now being held tightly by two large guards. The blousy shirt was tucked into tight fitting black satin trousers that had a codpiece.  The trousers, in turn, were bloused out where they were tucked into knee high, black leather boots with large heels.  Tied very tightly about his slender waist was a wide, red satin sash.  He looked even more handsome to me this year because he wore a goatee.  His light brown hair was falling into fierce blue eyes.  The audience was very close to him and I could admire his broad shoulders and firm pectorals under the shirt which tapered to a thin and lean waist.  I was breathless.

The pirate prince was manhandled onto the table and temporarily blocked from view by the five male guards in black leather.  When they stepped aside the audience was treated to the sight of that handsome, satin clad pirate lord struggling upon his back, as his hands were roughly pulled above his head, and his wrists viciously secured in steel shackles that were fastened to the table.  He was kicking his feet for all he was worth as the men in leather held down his thighs and forced his ankles into steel shackles.  Each man pushed down on one of the poor pirate’s extremities to hold him still as he was being sawed in half.  As they leaned into place the fifth man lifted up a long and very sharp crosscut saw that had layers of caked blood on the blade, dulling the metallic gleam.  The handsome pirate closed his eyes and began rocking his head back and forth.  The guards all began to smile making it clear that they enjoyed their work immensely.

The saw was then lowered very slowly and deliberately to the bottom of the red satin sash tied around this gorgeous young man’s waist.  The moment that the sharp tines poked into the satin waist sash, the young man’s eyes flew open and he gasped in fear though it seemed clear that he could not even beginning to fathom the hell he was about to endure.  His blue eyes pleaded with the audience but he found no comfort in their gaze.  I was about to see my blue eyed fantasy man, attired in a very sexy costume, be sawed in half.  Moreover, I would be the one holding the saw four nights a week for the next four weeks.  My heart was beating fast and my blood was pulsating with desire.

It was at the moment of my lustful revelation that the executioner pulled the saw back towards his body with a ferocious strength.  The pirate let out a small cry and pulled on all of his bonds at once to try in vain to flee.  His captors pushed on his legs, arms, and chest holding him down to the table.  The saw was pushed back toward the audience and slowly the teeth sawed deeper into the man’s waist as he screamed “Oh god no!  Please stop!” but his words turned to bloodcurdling screams of pain as the saw was pulled back and forth.  His body was tensing, his legs squirming, his back arching, his handsome face a picture of exquisite pain and fear.  The captors pushed their writhing victim back down upon the table with forceful hands and wide smiles.

The young man rocked his head back and forth as he screamed, his light brown hair fell into his wide, blue eyes.  The saw chewed relentlessly through bone and gristle as its victim shook in paroxysms of convulsions upon the table, his spine was being brutally severed.  The saw became smeared by bright red blood which marked the saw’s path of destruction through its handsome and helpless victim.  His hellish ordeal was not yet over for there were still two inches of relatively clean steel before the saw divided him completely.  The saw was pulled back and forth with a sadistic brutality as the pirate’s screams transformed into wet gurgling sounds.  The satin clad lordling arched his back once again and then fell down to the table, still and silent.   His blue eyes were open wide, staring at nothing.  The saw chewed onward until it fell through the divide in the table hitting the stone floor with a clang.  The men stationed at the quarters took this as their cue to pull the table, and the man upon it, apart.  The freshly severed halves faced the audience.  It was quite a finale, and a difficult role that I wasn’t sure I could perform nearly as well as the gorgeous, satin clad, young man who lay in two bloody halves before me.  I was beginning to doubt that I could even saw him in half without showing my excitement in those tight leather pants.

After we experienced the “dungeon of doom” we were all introduced to our individual cast members and brought through the rehearsal process.  Kevin, the director of my scene introduced me to the cast, the four guards, the executioner, and Clark.  Clark smiled warmly at me, and shook my hand. “So, you’re the man who is going to be the end of me?  Think that you have it in you to saw me in half four nights a week?”  I swallowed hard and he laughed.  I had to think of something to say back to him. “ Clark, I think that it is only fair that you saw me in half on occasion and give my arms some rest from all that hard work.”  He let out a great big warm laugh “That would be a welcome change.  John never let me saw him in half.  Then again, it’s only been a week and now he’s off to start his national tour.  Besides, I think you’ll look sexy in this costume!”  Kevin spoke up.  “Clark, I don’t think that you should flirt with the newcomer until you know if your advances would be desired.  He might take to actually sawing you in half if he becomes offended.”  I swallowed hard and saw that everyone was watching me to gauge my reaction.  “I wasn’t offended.  I’m very flattered by your comment.  I’d be happy if I could look half as handsome as you do in that costume.”  Kevin smiled broadly.  Well, we’ll all have the opportunity to be the judge momentarily because you’re about to go to wardrobe and get fitted for both of your costumes.  When you come back we’ll walk you through Clark’s path as the condemned pirate.  Welcome to the dungeon Mike.  Tonight, you should prepare to be sawed in half.”  I swallowed hard and prayed they had a jockstrap for me to borrow, satin pants do not hide a man’s excitement very well.

Clark accompanied me to wardrobe.  First I was fitted in the executioner’s costume and was amazed at how hot the leather became.  I had barely moved and already I was breaking a sweat! I took off the costume and saw that Clark was putting on the executioner’s costume.  He gave me a smile that about stopped my heart.  I was about to be sawed in half by this gorgeous man.  The thought aroused me once again.  The cute and catty costume supervisor came over to take put away my executioner’s leather costume, and give me the pirate lord’s satin one.   The costume supervisor was clearly going to be having fun at my expense.  “Well, it is a good thing that these trousers have a codpiece.  Clearly you’ll need it!”    The costume supervisor handed me the yellow satin pirate shirt and I smiled at Clark as I pulled it over my head.  The black satin trousers were next and I found out that the codpiece actually was a help, because the pants were very tight.  I pulled on the boots, then the costume supervisor lifted my hands above my head, wrapped the red satin waist sash around my middle three times, and then tied it at my left hip allowing the ends to hang to my knee.  The costume supervisor hit me hard on the butt. “It’s show time cutie!  Get ready to be twice the man you were.”  I gave him a wilted look and he laughed.

Clark and I walked back to the dungeon in silence.  Before I could say a word he grabbed me and pulled me into the storage room.  He started caressing my chest and looking into my eyes.  I smiled back at him and he leaned in to kiss me.  I grabbed his face and kissed him passionately.  His tongue made it into my mouth and I tasted his sweetness.  “You have no idea how long I’ve waited for this moment Clark.”  He ran his hands through my dark blond hair, and over my shoulders, massaging them through the satin.  I didn’t want to break our embrace but we we’re clearly going to be late for rehearsal.

As we entered the room, Kevin rushed up to greet us.  “Are you boys okay?  It took a bit longer than I thought, but the results are clearly worth it!  Mike, you look very handsome.  Well, we won’t have time to run the trial, or the struggle, but we should at least saw you in half so you can get the feel of it.”  Clark whispered something in Kevin’s ear which made him smile from ear to ear.  The four guards seemed to have overheard and started giggling and nodding their heads.  Before I knew it they grabbed me and lifted me up onto the table.  I was nervous because no one had told me the secret to being sawed in half.  “Wait guys, I don’t know the secret.  Can’t we run through it once with Clark showing me the secret so that I can learn what he does?”  I was panicking and the only response I received was four heads shaking no and a smiling director.  My heads were being pulled above my head and I felt the cold steel as my wrists were snapped into shackles around the satin cuffs.  I began to kick but the guards were too fast and soon my feet were pulled down to the end and my ankles locked into shackles.  “Guys, I’m really scared.  I know that it is just an illusion but I’m really terrified!  Can we please stop!”  They just laughed at me.  I felt like crying but then I saw Clark’s smile and felt his lips on mine.  My shirt was being opened and I felt his hand pinch my nipple.  His other hand caressed my chest through the satin.  “It’s going to be okay Michael.  I’d like to return the favor you gave me a while ago if you’ll let me.  Just lay back and enjoy.”  Clark smiled at me lovingly and then caressed my legs through the satin.  The guards all leaned forward and held my arms and legs down as I playfully struggled.  I remembered the lines Clark spoke earlier when he was about to be sawed in half.  “Oh God no!  Please DON’T Stop!”  Everyone burst out laughing.  I couldn’t ever remember being this turned on before.  Then I saw that Kevin had picked up the saw.

The Guards were holding me tight and caressing my satin clad body, clearly enjoying my pleasure and fear.  I guess that they weren’t really acting after all, they really enjoyed this scene.  “Kevin please!  I don’t know what to do!”  One of the guards raised his leather gloved hand and put it over my mouth.  My green eyes went wide and I began to scream. They all laughed as my fear as Kevin began to lower the saw down to the bottom of the red satin sash tied around my waist.  My head was jerked back preventing me from watching my own demise.  I was a terrified and completely helpless captive who was about to be actually sawed in half by six strangers, and there was noting I could do about it.

I struggled as hard as I could against my bounds and my captors.  I tried to move my mouth from under the guard’s hand but he was too fast and too strong.  I felt the cold metal of the saw on my waist and screamed as hard as I could when I felt the pressure as it was pulled across my abs.  The guard with his hand on my mouth spoke first, “Oh my god this is so hot!  I’ve always dreamed about doing this to a blond guy but never thought it would happen in a million years.  No offense Clark, but he’s hotter than you.”

I felt the saw move back and forth on my waist.  I was scared beyond belief, but I realized that though the pressure of the saw was intense, I felt absolutely no pain or tearing sensations.  I forced my captor to let me look down at the damage to my middle.  I saw no blood.  I then saw that Kevin had turned the saw upside down and was sawing with the dull end and had a huge smile on his face.  Emotions flashed through me in rapid succession; relief, confusion, and anger quickly turned into pleasure when I saw that all eyes were on me.  I decided to give them a good show.  The guy with his hand over my mouth wanted to see a handsome blond guy, restrained, dressed in satin, be sawed in half and the rest of them were clearly enjoying my torture as well.

I relished playing the helpless pirate lord and began to thrash and scream.  I arched my back and shook my pretty blond head.  I pleaded with my wide green eyes. I felt the guard who had his hand over my mouth release his grip over my face, grab my chest, and moan.  “God, this kid is incredible!  Where the hell did you find him Kevin?”  Another guard groaned in agreement.  “God, what a scene!”  I rocked my head back and forth and thrashed on the table. I forced my hips into the saw and yelled, “Saw me in half!  Rip me open!” The guys went wild and I knew at that moment that this month was going to be a good month at the Haunted House.

We’re proud to announce our sponsorship of The 2010 Male Survivor Conference on March 18-21, 2010.  It will be held at John Jay College in New York City.  This conference brings together advocates, professionals, and survivors to share new knowledge in the area of male sexual trauma.

We hear the lineup of presenters this year is going to be quite engaging.  WSO plans to be a presenter in 2011!

If you are in the New York City area make sure to attend.  We need to support new research in helping male survivors in their recovery process.  This conference supports breaking the silence about abuse.  Our men need our help more than ever.

For more information:

http://www.malesurvivor.org/conference-2010.html

Chris & Ophelia

WSO

I was going to write about the double standards employed in Domestic Violence Shelters.  

I was going to write about the double standards when it comes to criminalizing female perpetrators of domestic violence, versus criminalization of male perpetrated domestic violence.  

I was going to write about the imbalance of custody cases, and the double standards employed in family courts giving abusive mothers full custody over non-abusive fathers, based on false allegations and “he said she said.”  

 I am not going to.  

Today, 2,191 (TWO THOUSAND, ONE HUNDRED, AND NINETY ONE)  males will be the victim of domestic violence.  Within this hour, 91 (ninety one) men will be the victims of domestic violence, within this minute, 1.5 men will be the victim of domestic violence.  

Today, there are 3 (THREE) DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SHELTERS FOR MEN in the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA  

 Today, 55 men will commit suicide (or be ruled to have committed suicide), more than two men an hour will have committed suicide, or their cases will have been ruled a suicide.   Suicide of all men is the EIGHTH LEADING CAUSE OF DEATH in the United States.  Homicide for Black men is the fifth leading cause of death in the United States.  Suicide for American Indians or Alaska Natives is the 6th leading cause of death.  Homicide is the 6th leading cause of death for Hispanic males in the United States.  

 One in six males will be the victim of sexual abuse by the time they are adults.   21% (twenty-one percent) of all victims of human trafficking are male. 18% of all human trafficking cases are forced labor cases.  Males make up the majority of the forced labor cases globally, while females are the main perpetrator of human trafficking.  

Infant males are murdered more often than infant females (18.5 deaths per 100,000 boys of the same age vs.14.7 deaths per 100,000 girls of the same age), most often by their biological mothers, or mother’s partner (not biological fathers).  

Today while society turns its back on male victims, every single second that ticks by, another male (child or adult) will die by unnatural means.    Almost sixty men today will reach the end of their ropes, while playing the system, and running through red tape, dying, and leaving behind scores of children who are being raised by a society that designs their failure by removing their fathers, and all men from society.  

 Today, one hundred and twenty plus children will become fatherless.  

Today over four thousand children will be witness to domestic violence perpetrated against their father or another man acting in the place of their father in their household, at the hands of their mother, or another female acting in the place of their mother.  

June is Domestic Violence Against Men Awareness Month, please take a moment to offer solace, to hear his side, to hear the children’s side before choosing her side over his…before fear mongering all men and shaming them into the outskirts of society, before laughing and shaming male victims of violence.  

 Today, IS tomorrow.  Today and each step you and I take, will determine what is written tomorrow.  Today, is here now, please do not waste it, do not break it, do not bend the truth today, to fit your version of truth tomorrow.  

 Tami Pepperman Victim/Child Advocate

tamikay23@hotmail.com

3651 Solokar Rd. Loon Lake, WA 99148

1-509-937-2478 (home)

1-509-936-1892 (cell)

references: http://www.cdc.gov/men/lcod/index.htm http://www.cdc.gov/women/lcod.htm   http://jimhopper.com/ http://1in6.org/   http://www.unodc.org/unodc/en/human-trafficking/global-report-on-trafficking-in-persons.html   http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cb/pubs/cm06/chapter4.htm#age *fatherless children statistics are based on the average daily suicide rate, as determined by the average family size, via the CIA https://www.cia.gov/ *children as witnesses to domestic violence is based on the average family size, as determined by the CIA https://www.cia.gov/

All youth can be recruited or forced into the sextrade.

However some youth are more at risk.

Youth in foster care and youth with child welfare involvement

A 2007 research report out of New York State found a high correlation between child welfare involvement and subsequent commercial sexual exploitation. between 85 to 89% of youth reported to be commercially sexually exploited had prior child welfare involvement.1

Youth who are homeless,AWOL, runaway, in unstable housing  situations

Research results demonstrate a consistently high risk of involvement in survival sex or other forms of commercial sexual exploitation for youth without stable housing. the most recent federally funded national study found 70% of homeless youth are commercially sexually exploited.2

Out of school youth, unemployed youth, low or no income youth

While not documented specifically in research, youth in group discussions have reported a lack of money or survival needs (even when youth have a place to live), lack of access to jobs and lack of skills from dropping  out or being pushed out of school as direct links to their involvement or consideration of the sex trade to make money.

Youth with family involved in the sex trade and/or an active sex trade in their community

Youth in prevention workshops continue to identify being around an active sex trade in their community or family members involved in the sex trade as a risk factor. Youth stress that people in the community are more likely to encourage or recruit them and an active sex trade normalizes the option.

Youth with a history of sexual abuse

All research studies that ask youth who are or have been involved in the sex trade about previous sexual abuse prior to any commercial sexual exploitation find rates of up to over 90%. Research also suggests that sexual abuse is a factor independent of any resulting running away or substance abuse.3

Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer and Questioning Youth

Personally I disapprove of the word Queer…..by definition….abnormal or odd.  Traditional teachings tell me that all human beings are spiritually equal in creation and have a purpose in the grand scheme of life.  But the movement is because of the context in which it was reclaimed, queer has sociopolitical connotations, and is often preferred by those who are activists, by those who strongly reject traditional gender identities, by those who reject distinct sexual identities such as gay, lesbian, bisexual and straight, and by those who see themselves as oppressed by the heteronormativity of the larger culture. In this usage it retains the historical connotation of “outside the bounds of normal society” and can be construed as “breaking the rules for sex and gender.” It can be preferred because of its ambiguity, which allows “queer” identifying people to avoid the sometimes strict boundaries that surround other labels. In this context, “queer” is not a synonym for LGBT as it creates a space for “queer” heterosexuals as well as “non-queer” (“straight-acting”) homosexuals.4

LGBTQQ youth make up 20 to 40% of all homeless youth, resulting in high rates of survival sex.5

Additionally, a study in Canada found LGBT youth were three times more likely to trade sex for survival than heterosexual youth.5 Almost 60% of transgender youth reported exchanging sex for money in recent Chicago based research.

Youth of Color

African American minors are over-represented in prostitution arrests, comprising 55% of all arrests of juveniles for prostitution across the U.S. in 2002. Some of the evidence suggests this may have to do with unequal law enforcement strategies that target communities of color. However this may also reflect a higher involvement of African American, Latino, Asian,  and Native American or First Nations, that  experience higher rates of poverty and involvement in the child welfare system.

1. Gragg, F. et al.  (2007). New York Prevalence Study of Commercially Sexually Exploited Children. http://www.ocfs.state.ny.us/main/reports/CSEC-2007.pdf. Accessed April 8, 2009

2. Estes. R and Weiner N. (2001). The Commercial Sexual Exploitation of Children in the United States. Canada and Mexico. http://www.sp2.upenn.edu/-restes/csec Files/Complete CSEC 020220.pdf. Accesses April 8, 2009

3. Simons. R and Whitebeck, L. (1991) Sexual Abuse as a Precurser to prostitution and Victimization Among Adolescent and Adult Homeless Women. Journal of family Issues, 12(3).

4. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Queer

5. National Gay and Lesbian Task Force (2007). Lesbian,gay, bisexual and trangender youth: An epidemic of homelessness. http://www.thetaskforce.org/reports and research/homeless youth. Accessed April 8, 2009

6. (Gaetz, S. (2004). Safe streets for whom? Homeless youth, social exclusion, and criminal victimization. canadian Journal of Criminal Justice, 46(6).)

7.Howard Brown Health Center (2008). http://www.howardbrown.org/uploadFiles /HowardBrownResearchNews0408.pdf. Accessed April 8. 2009

8. Federal Bureau of Investigation. (2002). Crime in the United States. http://www.fbi.gov/ucr/cuis 02/html/web/arrested/04-table43.html. Accessed April 8, 2009

Claudine O”Leary    www.rethinkresources.net

A few personal thoughts by yours truly…

Physical Evidence

Difficulty Going To The Bathroom

Blood of Semen on the child’s diaper or clothing.

Unexplained lesions in genital and or anal area.

Presence of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs)

Frequent vaginal infections

• Behavioral changes
• Failure to thrive
• Extreme change in mood, grades, social interactions
• Loss of appetite
• Fear of being left alone with someone
• Mental health deterioration, Suicidal tendencies
• Age inappropriate knowledge of Sexual Behaviors
• Sexualized behaviors
• Poor body image and or self esteem
• Self mutilation
• Delinquency
• At risk behaviors

This is my response to the searcher who ask the above.
Abusers are MASTERS of deception,
“All deception in the course of life is indeed nothing else but a lie reduced to practice, and falsehood passing from words into things.”
Author: Robert Southey, manipulation, “For I have sworn thee fair, and thought thee bright, who art as black as hell, as dark as night.”
Author: William Shakespeare, and the only love they feel is for themselves and their property.
HOW CAN YOU LOVE THE THING YOU COVET AND AT THE SAME TIME BEGRUDGE THEIR HUMANITY?
What do I mean by humanity…..the gifts bestowed you by your creator….your gift of sight that views beauty in another human being or creation, the gift of touch that makes you spontaneously reach out to touch another human being, the gift of scent or the gift of sound. He/she is with out fault but you may have many, it is human to have fault is it not?

THE DEFINITION OF LOVE.
by Andrew Marvell

I.
MY Love is of a birth as rare
As ’tis, for object, strange and high ;
It was begotten by Despair,
Upon Impossibility.

II.
Magnanimous Despair alone
Could show me so divine a thing,
Where feeble hope could ne’er have flown,
But vainly flapped its tinsel wing.

III.
And yet I quickly might arrive
Where my extended soul is fixed ;
But Fate does iron wedges drive,
And always crowds itself betwixt.

IV.
For Fate with jealous eye does see
Two perfect loves, nor lets them close ;
Their union would her ruin be,
And her tyrannic power depose.

V.
And therefore her decrees of steel
Us as the distant poles have placed,
(Though Love’s whole world on us doth wheel),
Not by themselves to be embraced,

VI.
Unless the giddy heaven fall,
And earth some new convulsion tear.
And, us to join, the world should all
Be cramp’d into a planisphere.

VII.
As lines, so love’s oblique, may well
Themselves in every angle greet :
But ours, so truly parallel,
Though infinite, can never meet.

VIII.
Therefore the love which us doth bind,
But Fate so enviously debars,
Is the conjunction of the mind,
And opposition of the stars.

Source:
Marvell, Andrew. The Poems of Andrew Marvell.
G. A. Aitken, Ed. London: Lawrence & Bullen, 1892. 73-74.

PROPERTY HAS NO HUMAN VALUE!

This is an interesting quote it is uncanny that most abusers deny that they are abusive.
“It is twice the pleasure to deceive the deceiver.”
Author: Jean De La Fontaine

You are sincerely revered and honored by me……thank-you!

More info is available at the Men in My Town Blog at http://www.meninmytown.wordpress.com

I recently listened to a story from an Indian man who is a survivor and is encouraging other men to speak up about the sexual abuse they have suffered in their lives.
He is doing this for several reasons, most importantly it is breaking the silence, and the road to healing can begin. Another reason is that perpetrators may be held accountable and other young boys may be saved from the same abuse.
It is harder for males to admit they have been victimized sexually by other males for reasons we as a society play a role in. First of all, there is a stink about homosexuality that permeates this country and the world. This stench denies male victims justice, for fear of social ostracism. Secondly, society has equated masculinity to strength as in not having human emotions and the main perpetrators of this is men themselves. Myself, as a women, witnessing a man showing human emotion attribute this to integrity and balance. Lastly, we as women and mother’s of both sexes, male and female are not acknowledging these issues exist and our children are suffering and most likely will die or commit suicide with this socially perpetrated injustice. Following is an article to prove my point further:
Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
April 1, 2009
“Trail of Tears”
Police are digging into two possible suicides, a drug death and the molestation of at least 28 boys.
TRACKING ACKER’S TRAIL
By Tom Kertscher
GREENFIELD, WI– At least one and possibly two of Daniel Acker’s suspected victims committed suicide and a third died because of complications from drug use, according to the police official who is supervising the Acker investigation.
And Greenfield police now believe that Acker, 61, a longtime West Allis resident before moving to Waukesha last year, molested at least 28 boys.
In an hour long interview Tuesday with the Journal Sentinel, Deputy Inspector Bradley Wentlandt retraced the “trail of tears” detectives have followed in their investigation, which could reach a pivotal stage this week.
And he detailed how Acker, who is suspected of assaulting boys in his homes, on the lakefront, in a park and elsewhere, managed to cloak his actions over four decades.
“I guess you could say that over time, he got better at it,” Wentlandt said.
Prosecutors have charged Acker with a 2005 assault on a boy who is now 19 and are expected to decide this week whether to file charges involving two other suspected victims.
In an interview Sunday from jail, where Acker admitted to “weaknesses,” and “poor choices” but denied having sexual relations with boys.
Greenfield police are investigating the case because on of Acker’s accuser’s, a man now in his 40’s said he was molested by Acker in Greenfield in the 1970’s.
Wentlandt said the man reported the alleged assaults in a voice mail message left march 19 with West Allis-West Milwaukee Recreation Department, which has employed Acker as a part-time swim instructor for 37 years.
Wentlandt said a supervisor of that department spoke to the man the same day, then informed Greenfield Police March 23 Acker was arrested that day while teaching a youth swim class in West Allis.
Wentlandt said he didn’t know why the supervisor waited four days to make the report but doesn’t believe the delay hampered investigation.
Since then, more than 100 people have spoken to investigators. Police say the 28 males they have identified as victims were molested by Acker between 1972 and 2005.
The boys generally were between the ages of 7 and 15 when they were abused, although some continued to be molested into their later teen years, according to Wentlandt.
The assaults occurred over the years at Acker’s homes, first in Greenfield and later on the northwest side of Milwaukee and in West Allis, where he lived from 1990 to 2008, Wentlandt said.
Acker also molested boys at Whitnall Park, near Like Michigan, in Eagle River and in Waterford in Racine County, Wentlandt said.
Acker met the boys from among the literally thousands of children who took his swim classes, through a previous job working at the Milwaukee County Mental Health Complex and through other people, Wentlandt said.
Acker befriended boys from troubled families, bought them things and took them places, let them hang out at his home and sometimes gave them alcohol and marijuana.
After a period of months, he would ask the boys if he could take nude pictures of them; later he would touch them sexually.
Some of the boys refused to be photographed nude and never saw Acker again, but others-thankful for the attention Acker showed them-succumbed to indecent touching and eventually to more advanced sexual activity, Wentlandt said.
“They’re already being assaulted before they know what happened,” Wentlandt said.
“I GUESS YOU COULD SAY OVER TIME HE (Acker) GOT BETTER AT IT.”
One of the suspected victims committed suicide as an adult, another death is considered a possible suicide and a third died from complications stemming from drug use, Wentlandt said. He said relatives of the drug user tied the drug use to Acker’s suspected assaults.
Other men identified as Acker’s victims suffer from broken marriages and can’t hold jobs, Wentlandt said.
Even though the number of suspected victims has reached 28, it is not known whether police will be able to seek charges involving more than the three cases already submitted to the district attorney’s office.
In 15 of the cases, the alleged abuse would have occurred before 1989, beyond the statute of limitations. In 10 cases the suspected victims were unable or unwilling to provide enough information.
Equally frustrating is the belief that Acker likely continued molesting boys after 2005, the year of the assault involving the 19-year-old, Wentlandt said.
But Wentlandt said he understands, having witnessed the anguish of men in their 30’s and 40’s recounting their allegations of abuse by Acker, how a teen molested more recently would not come forward. Victims often feel a stigma about having been abused, believe they somehow consented to it or fear being labeled homosexual, he said.
“I can’t imagine how a 14 year old boy would feel in the same circumstances” said Wentlandt.
Despite police allegations that Acker committed hundreds of attacks, neither West Allis nor Greenfield police have records of any prior reports of abuse by Acker. Milwaukee police said they have no record of any other contact with him.
After his arrest, Acker would not volunteer any information about sexual contact with boys, Wentlandt said.
But after being confronted with the details about the 19 year old and about five other victims from the 1970s, he admitted to assaults involving these boys, Wentlandt said.
Wentlandt said he hoped to exhaust most leads this week and then turn over information to other law enforcement authorities about alleged assaults in their communities.
As a mother and a tribal victim advocate I am pleading with you boys and men to break your silence and bring these perpetrators to justice so we may can put a stop to this on our lands!

THE DETAILS SURROUNDING THE CRIMEOn Tuesday, June 8, 1999, the bodies of Wilson Edison Black Elk, Jr. and Ronald Owen Hard Heart were found on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation(PRIR) in South Dakota, several hundred yards north of the Nebraska-South Dakota border near White Clay, Nebraska. The two victims, both residents of PRIR, were last seen on the main road to Pine Ridge, South Dakota from White Clay, Nebraska on Sunday, June 6, 1999. Authorities have determined that both victims were murdered.

Wilson Edison Black Elk, Jr.

Ronald Owen Hard Heart

Victims (Deceased) REWARDThe FBI is offering a reward of up to $20,000 for information leading to the arrest and conviction of the person or persons responsible for the murders of Wilson Edison Black Elk, Jr. and Ronald Owen Hard Heart.

IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION CONCERNING THIS PERSON, PLEASE CONTACT YOUR LOCAL FBI OFFICE OR THE NEAREST AMERICAN EMBASSY OR CONSULATE.

DIRECTOR
FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION
UNITED STATES DEPARTMENT OF JUSTICE
WASHINGTON, D.C. 20535
TELEPHONE: (202) 324-3000

Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
2/7/2009
By Crocker Stephenson

Vera Morehouse, who police say allowed her infant son to starve to death, was charged earlier with intentionally running over the child’s father weeks before a case worker left her children with her without providing additional safety services, according to court records and a report released Friday.
Morehouse was charges earlier in April with misdemeanor neglect….one of her children a 6 year old boy was found sleeping on a playground bench near her apartment at about 7 p.m., Morehouse was not home.

…..Milwaukee Child Welfare was notified….the 6th referral the bureau had received….since 2005 and the second that month.
…..It is unclear if, the caseworker was aware Morehouse had been charged March 29 with second-degree recklessly endangering safety.
According to the complaint filed in the case, Morehouse loaded her children into her car looking for their father…..she found him with his girlfriend…..she tried to drop the children off with him…..he refused….she took the children out of the car…..drove over the curb…..children watching…..and hit him…..he landed on the hood smashing the windshield.
Morehouse was pregnant at the time with a son born June 1…..the boy spent most of his life strapped into a car seat, and died of starvation.
…..among the findings is that the caseworker had not tried hard enough to help the family.
“The failure to act is inexcusable”, said Cyrus Behroozi, Children and Families Administrator.
Less than two months after her son’s death on September 20, Morehouse attacked and stabbed babies father’s pregnant girlfriend she was charged with substantial battery while armed……she threatened her and stated she was going to kill her and “stomp the baby out of her”…..the girlfriend ran and got stabbed in the buttocks.
Morehouse was also charged with violating a restraining order filed by the girlfriend two days earlier.
WHAT AM I THINKING…..NEVER GIVE UP…..USE EVERY RESOURCE AVAILABLE…..AND “GOD BLESS THE CHILD…..”!

Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
By Erin Richards
2/6/09

Since Anthony Stancl former New Berlin Eisenhower High School student was charged Wednesday facing charges for using facebook to sexually assault peers.
Stancl, 18 was charged by Waukesha County district attorney Wednesday with posing as a female on facebook, a social networking site, persuading at least 31 teenage boys from Eisenhower to send him nude photos of themselves and the threaten to release those pictures to the public unless the victims agreed to perform sex acts with him.

Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
by Jacqui Seibel
2/7/09
The Waukesha County district attorney said Friday that he hopes to prosecute without having to call victims on stand……”For child victims of sexual abuse, we have to find a way so they don’t have to relive this in the courtroom,” District Attorney Brad Schilmel said.
Authorities think there was more boys but no more have come forward, the boys ages were from age 13 to 19…..about 300 photo’s were found on Stencl’s computer.
PARENTS TALK TO YOUR CHILDREN!
GET CYBER SMART!
TEENAGERS GET CYBER SMART!
REPORT CYBER SEXUAL PREDATORS THE LINKS ARE UNDER THE BLOGROLL.
STOP SENDING NUDE PHOTO’S INTO CYBERSPACE.

Assimilation policies also took the form of mandatory boarding schools, with devastating consequences that continue to reverberate today through out Indian Country. It is believed that the prevalence of Indian-on-Indian domestic and sexual violence in Native communities is rooted in the forced removal of Indian children from their homes and from their families and Tribes into religious and government-operated boarding schools.  I must add that some of the boarding schools were run by the military, for instance the Fort Totten Boarding School in North Dakota. This boarding school had grey nuns from Canada that were established on site and housed children from the age of five, forcibly taken from their families. The school it self is still standing today. Under the school is dirt sellers with bars where children were placed in solitary confinement.  Twenty inch paths from dorm to classrooms were patrolled by military on horseback carrying crops to keep children on the beaten path. Apache women had their garments adapted  (skirts) made wide and large, to attempt to hide their children from agents.

From 1879 through the 1950s,  more that 300 boarding schools across the county taught lessons of self hate, domestic and sexual abuse, gender stereotypes and patriarchal norms to Native children forced or coerced into attending the schools.

Children attending the boarding schools were not permitted to see their families, speak their own language, or follow their cultural practices or traditional religion, the children were expected to  stay for a minimum of four years.

It is believed thst the prevalence of Indian-on-Indian domestic and sexual assault in Native communities is rooted in the forced removal of Indian from their homes and from their families and tribes and into religious snd government-operated boarding schools. -Felix S. Cohen

Felix Solomon Cohen (July 3, 1907 – October 19, 1953) was a lawyer and scholar who made a lasting mark on legal philosophy and fundamentally shaped federal Indian law and policy.

Cohen was the drafter of the centerpiece legislation of this era, the 1934 Indian Reorganization Act. In 1939 he became Chief of the Indian Law Survey, an effort to compile the federal laws and treaties regarding American Indians. The resulting book, published in 1941 as The Handbook of Federal Indian Law.

The trauma suffered from boarding school survivors is expressed today in substance abuse,  suicide, domestic violence,  pedophelia, sexual assault, and being passed on to further generations.

PEOPLE …PLEASE DON’T ALLOW YOUR SILENCE COMMIT THESE CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY

ADVANCE FOR RELEASE AT 9:00 A.M. EST Bureau of Justice Statistics THURSDAY, JANUARY 15, 2009 Sheila Jerusalem 202-616-3227 www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs After hours: 202-598-3570 MORE THAN 1,200 ALLEGED INCIDENTS OF HUMAN TRAFFICKING REPORTED IN THE U.S. WASHINGTON – In the first 21 months of operation, the Human Trafficking Reporting System (HTRS) recorded information on more than 1,200 alleged incidents of human trafficking, the U.S. Department of Justice’s Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS) announced today. The HTRS contains data collected by 38 federally funded human trafficking task forces on alleged incidents of human trafficking that occurred between January 1, 2007, and September 30, 2008. The Trafficking Victims Protection Act of 2000 (TVPA), and its reauthorizations in 2003, 2005, and 2008 define a human trafficking victim as a person induced to perform labor or a commercial sex act through force, fraud, or coercion. Any person under age 18 who performs a commercial sex act is considered a victim of human trafficking, regardless of whether force, fraud, or coercion was present. Most (83 percent) of the reported human trafficking incidents involved allegations of sex trafficking. Labor trafficking accounted for 12 percent of incidents, and other or unknown forms of human trafficking made up the remaining five percent. About a third (32 percent) of the 1,229 alleged human trafficking incidents involved sex trafficking of children. More than a quarter of alleged sex trafficking incidents contained multiple victims, and nearly half of labor trafficking incidents had more than one victim. Labor trafficking incidents were more likely to involve more than one suspect (47 percent), compared to sex trafficking incidents (37 percent). As of September 30, 2008, less than 10 percent of the 1,229 alleged incidents had been confirmed as human trafficking. To be confirmed in the HTRS, the case must have led to an arrest and been subsequently confirmed by law enforcement, or the victims must have received a special non-immigrant Visa classification, as provided under the 2000 TVPA. Over 90 percent of victims in both alleged and confirmed human trafficking incidents were female. Nearly 40 percent of victims in alleged and confirmed labor trafficking incidents were male, while almost all (99%) victims in alleged and confirmed sex trafficking incidents were female. Hispanic victims comprised the largest share (37 percent) of alleged sex trafficking victims and more than half (56 percent) of alleged labor trafficking victims. Asians made up 10 percent of alleged sex trafficking victims, compared to 31 percent of labor trafficking victims. Approximately two-thirds of victims in alleged human trafficking incidents were age 17 or younger (27 percent) or age 18 to 24 (38 percent). Sex trafficking victims tended to be younger (71 percent were under age 25) and labor trafficking victims tended to be older (almost 70 percent were age 25 or older). Slightly more than half of all victims in alleged human trafficking incidents were U.S. citizens. U.S. citizens accounted for 63 percent of sex trafficking victims, compared to four percent of labor trafficking victims. Nearly eight in 10 human trafficking suspects were male. A fifth of sex trafficking suspects were female, compared to about a third of labor trafficking suspects. Nearly two-thirds of sex trafficking suspects were under age 35, while nearly two-thirds of labor trafficking suspects were age 35 or older. U.S. citizens accounted for 66 percent of suspects in alleged incidents. Nearly three-quarters of sex trafficking suspects and a third of labor trafficking suspects were U.S. citizens. The Trafficking Victims Protection Reauthorization Act of 2005 (P.L. 109-164) requires the submission of biennial reports on human trafficking using available data from state and local authorities. In response to this requirement, the Department of Justice (DOJ) funded the creation of the HTRS, which was designed by the Institute of Race and Justice at Northeastern University (NEU) and the Justice Policy Center at the Urban Institute (UI). The HTRS is updated monthly. The data in this report represent the status of each case as of September 30, 2008. The report, Characteristics of Suspected Human Trafficking Incidents, 2007-08 (NCJ 224526), was written by BJS statisticians Tracey Kyckelhahn, Allen J. Beck, and Thomas H. Cohen. Following publication, the report can be found at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/abstract/cshti08.htm. For additional information about the Bureau of Justice Statistics’ statistical reports and programs, please visit the BJS Web site at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs. The Office of Justice Programs (OJP), headed by Assistant Attorney General Jeffrey L. Sedgwick, provides federal leadership in developing the nation’s capacity to prevent and control crime, administer justice, and assist victims. OJP has five component bureaus: the Bureau of Justice Assistance; the Bureau of Justice Statistics; the National Institute of Justice; the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention; and the Office for Victims of Crime. In addition, OJP has two program offices: the Community Capacity Development Office, which incorporates the Weed and Seed strategy, and the Office of Sex Offender Sentencing, Monitoring, Apprehending, Registering, and Tracking (SMART). More information can be found at http://www.ojp.gov.

If you need information on domestic violence, step by step procedures on filing restraining orders or injunctions or need forms to print out for your State just click on WomensLaw.org. under the blogroll.

As proffessional, it is our responsibility to suspend judgement regardless of the circimstance. Treat each victim with respect and acknowledge the courage and strengths they have exhibited for reporting and seeking our services.

Sexual assault victims experience varying degrees of psychological trauma. An individual’s perception of how a sexual assault victim should look, dress or act, and the way those perceptions are conveyed can have significant effect upon the victim’s recovery process in the weeks and months following the crime. Each person has his or her method of coping with sudden stress. When severly traumatized, victims can appear calm, indifferent, submissive, angry, or even uncooperative and hostile toward those who are trying to help. Misinterpretations of a victim’s reaction to their assault may lead to further trauma and hinder the interview, evidence collection or legal proceedings.

Listed below are some of the feelings that may be felt by victims:

• Fear of offender
• Fear of what family and friends might think
• Fear of others finding out
• Guilt and feelings that she or he is responsible for the assault
• Sense of vulnerability and general fear of people
• Loss of control over her or his own life
• Embarrassment
• Anxiety
• Concern for the offender’s well being, especially in cases of acquaintance or spousal rape
• Shame-loss of self respect
• Stupidity or foolishness
• Anger
• Confusion
• Sexual Assault Crisis line (920) 436 8899 24 hours

Women can’t rape, men cannot be raped….

The Local – Woman Charged Over Violent Rape
World (tags: female rapist, female victim, aggravated rape )

Henric C
thelocal.se

A 32-year-old woman from northern Sweden has been indicted on a charge of aggravated rape after forcing another woman at knife point to perform oral sex. The Prosecutor said that it is extremely unusual for a woman to be charged with aggravated rape.

—

The Local – Woman Held for Raping Man in Stockholm
World (tags: Rape, Female rapist, male victim )

Henric C
thelocal.se

A 41-year-old woman in being held by police in Stockholm on suspicions of raping a 30-year-old man who went home with her after the two met at an area pub on Monday night.

Isn’t ironic that the very same day when there is a discussion in Human Rights Network, in which it is being claimed that rape and abuse in war-zones is a male thing, and not something both gender can commit, I find these two news stories?

I am going to savour this – not because I think rape is something acceptable, but because I found RECENT news refuting the idea that women don’t rape and men cannot be raped.

Quiz Your Relationship

• Does your boyfriend/girlfriend have a bad temper? Do they take their anger out on pets and objects….punching walls, slamming doors,throwing things or hurting animals? Ask yourself….How do I feel when my partner is acting this way? If it is fear that you feel then it is with out a doubt not love.
• Is he/she always asking you where you went, who you were with, what your were doing, what you were talking about? Ask yourself…. How do I feel when my partner is acting this way? If it is humiliation that you feel then it is with out a doubt not love.
• Does he/she use alcohol or drugs? Ask yourself…. How do I feel when my partner is acting this way? If it is insecurity that you feel then it is with out a doubt not love.
• Is he/she telling you that you don’t know anything and that they know better than you? Ask yourself…. How do I feel when my partner is acting this way? If it is inadequacy that you feel then it is with out a doubt not love.
• Is he/she telling you that they want total commitment from you unusually early on in the relationship and planning marriage along comes baby? Ask your self….How do I feel when my partner is acting this way? If it is confusion that you feel then it is with out a doubt not love.
  
• Is he/she telling you to do things that you know in your head and heart are wrong? Does he/she encourage you to lie, disobey, and disregard your parents/family? Ask yourself…. How do I feel when my partner is acting this way? If it is shame that you feel then it is with out a doubt not love.
• Does he/she disregard you when you say “NO” and force you to have sex?…. Ask yourself…. How do I feel when my partner is acting this way? If is all the feeling above then it is with out a doubt not love.
  

 Teenagers did you know that……

1. You don’t have to wear a black eye for your relationship to be abusive.
2. Calling you names like idiot, and threatening you, as well as talking down to you is verbal abuse.
3. Being pushed, shoved, slapped, punched, hair pulling, scratched,or your physical property is being destroyed is physical abuse.
4. Violent sex, unwanted sex, date rape, sexual contact that does not include the act of intercourse is sexual assault and is against the law.

• Jealous
• Narcissistic
• Obsessive and compulsive
• Falls “instantly” in love
• Manipulative
• Does not take responsibility of own feelings or actions
• Needs to have control over others
• Socially awkward or uncomfortable
• Views self as a victim of society, family and others
• Unable to take “no” for an answer
• Deceptive
• Often switches between rage and “love”
• Difficulty distinguishing between fantasy and reality
• Sense of entitlement (“You owe me…”)
• Unable to cope with rejection
• Dependent on others for sense of “self”
• Views his or her problems as someone else’s fault
• May be of above average intelligence

To Help Kids Who Have Witnessed Domestic Violence.

• Provide them with a space to talk about what happened. Younger kids may lack the ability to express their emotions. Perhaps propose drawing activities to help them express themselves and what happened. Do not push the child to talk, he will in his own time. Rather, create an atmosphere which is favorable to confidence and the expression of emotions.
• Do not make promises to “keep the secret” because if the child divulges abuse on himself (or herself), you won’t be able to keep that promise. Rather, tell the child that he/she is safe with you and that if there is something he/she would like to talk about, you will be able to help.
• Tell the child it wasn’t her/his fault.
• If the child shows violent behaviors it is important to take position against violence, in all its shapes or forms. However, it is important to remember that most children who suffer from PTSD will act out and thus, their “violence” is not a sign that the child is himself “violent like his father”. In this sense, it is important to give the child a space to express his anger and feelings in non-threatening ways. These children do not need to be disciplined, they need to be understood.
• Give the child some time to open up to you. His/her trust has been harshly tested and it may take them time to open up to your efforts.
• It may be important to seek professional consultation for children who have witnessed domestic violence.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in Children

Traumatic stress is produced by exposure to events that are so extreme or severe and threatening, that they demand extraordinary coping efforts. Such events are often unpredicted and uncontrollable. They overwhelm a person’s sense of safety and security. Children are more at risk for post traumatic stress disorder than adults because they lack the cognitive abilities as well as the emotional understanding that helps people cope with traumatic events such as witnessing battering. From the point of view of a child, domestic violence is more than “daddy hits mommy” or “daddy says that mommy is stupid”. From their point of view, their main attachment figure and source of life is being attacked and hurt by an equally loved adult who alternates between acts of violence and acts of love. This is all very confusing for children to witness.

More than half of the school-age children in domestic violence shelters show clinical levels of anxiety or post-traumatic stress disorder (Graham-Bermann, 1994). Without treatment, these children are at significant risk for delinquency, substance abuse, school drop-out, and difficulties in their own relationships.

Children may exhibit a wide range of reactions to exposure to violence in their home. Younger children (e.g., pre-school and kindergarten) oftentimes, do not understand the meaning of the abuse they observe and tend to believe that they “must have done something wrong.” Self-blame can precipitate feelings of guilt, worry, and anxiety. It is important to consider that children, especially younger children, typically do not have the ability to adequately express their feelings verbally. Consequently, the manifestation of these emotions are often behavioral. Children may become withdrawn, non-verbal, and exhibit regressed behaviors such as clinging and whining. Eating and sleeping difficulty, concentration problems, generalized anxiety, and physical complaints (e.g., headaches) are all common.

Unlike younger children, the pre-adolescent child typically has greater ability to externalize negative emotions (e.g., to verbalize). In addition to symptoms commonly seen with childhood anxiety (e.g., sleep problems, eating disturbance, nightmares), victims within this age group may show a loss of interest in social activities, low self-concept, withdrawal or avoidance of peer relations, rebelliousness and oppositional-defiant behavior in the school setting. It is also common to observe temper tantrums, irritability, frequent fighting at school or between siblings, lashing out at objects, treating pets cruelly or abusively, threatening of peers or siblings with violence (e.g., “give me a pen or I will smack you”), and attempts to gain attention through hitting, kicking, or choking peers and/or family members. Incidentally, girls are more likely to exhibit withdrawal and unfortunately, run the risk of being overlooked as a child in need of support.

Adolescents are at risk of academic failure, school drop-out, delinquency, and substance abuse. Some investigators have suggested that a history of family violence or abuse is the most significant difference between delinquent and non delinquent youth. An estimated 1/5 to 1/3 of all teenagers who are involved in dating relationships are regularly abusing or being abused by their partners verbally, mentally, emotionally, sexually, and/or physically (SASS, 1996).

Witnessing Domestic Violence in childhood  and Violence Later in Life

Men who have witnessed their parents domestic violence are three times more likely to abuse their own wives than children of non-violent parents, with the sons of the most violent parents being 1000 times more likely to become perpetrators of domestic abuse.
(Straus, M.A., Gelles, R.J. & Steinmetz, S. Behind closed Doors. Doubleday, Anchor. 1980)

Memories of men in Lock Up Raw on MSNBC on death row and those with life sentances with out parole have grown up in violent homes.