Way back in April, I posted about my search for a new mobile phone. Well it appears not only was I not offered the right phone (even by my request) that was available, but as time has gone on my vendor (Vodacrone) has been made all too aware of my unhappiness.

Now, to be completely fair I like the systems employed by this once great company – but their sales people are nothing more than cut-throat sharks!!!

I listed that I wanted a robust phone with qwerty keyboard, quadband, and wifi. I told them I would like something like a Blackberry. I was told that I could not have one as these were for business tariffs only. They sent me a Nokia E65 which is one hell of a clever phone, there is nothing this thing cannot connect to. I was away for the two weeks after it arrived so fell foul of the ‘14 day returns policy’.

So why don’t I like this phone – well it’s crap because it dials numbers and connects to the internet all by itself!! This is a ’slide’ phone, if you lock the keypad and place it in your inside jacket pocket you would think it would be safe – NO WAY, if that slide moves just one millimeter it unlocks the keyboard! – and then you end up connecting to the internet, ringing friends in Australia and all manner of stupidity…

So I complained about it – they told me to buy a case for it. In fact every time ‘they’ have phoned me and ask if everything is alright – I tell them the phone is not alright and is not working in the manner it was expected to.

Last week I get a call from Vodacrone and they tell me what a wonderful customer I am, they say they’re giving me a second line with hundreds of free minutes and that for nime months they’ll only charge me £10 a month for it. On top of this I will get unlimited internet and a new fone.

The new phone was a Blackberry Curve and didn’t do what they said it would do – no wifi!!! The software is slow and frankly crap – though the video is pretty darn good.

However, I looked into their tariffs and realised I had been fooled yet again!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today I spent over an hour trying to get through to these people. I told them I wishd to return the Blackberry and talk about my primary tariff – I then went on to complain about my phone.

This is the outcome;

Extra line canceled and Blackberry to be collected.

I can upgrade my tariff, but I have to keep the same Bag of SH*T phone. But the lady did tell me something VERY VERY interesting… I could of had the phone I wanted in the first place all along… I was and I still am livid!!

It turns out that they claim I can only upgrade this phone 72 days before the end of the contract, but they’re happy to take more money off me for a) selling me a product not fit for purpose b) being mislead and lied to by a sales person and just to add insult to injury c) the lady noticed that the deal on the second line for 9 months at £10 has been then reset to 3 months!!!!

Not a surprise that they rip us off and do dodgy stuff when they sponsor the most expensive Formula 1 team in the world!!

I told her they could have this crap phone back and I would place the sim card in a old cheap phone – she told me that I should ring their customer service as there is a possibility (at a cost) that under these circumstances that my phone can be changed.

BOLLOCKS: Vodafone was better when Ian Heath worked for them! (and that’s saying something)