I “borrowed” this little quiz from The Girl From The Ghetto with her permission of course. However, she borrowed it from another blog who borrowed it from another blog so please feel free to borrow it from me.

1. Have you ever mooned/flashed anyone? How long ago?

I don’t believe I have ever flashed anyone the full monty but I have done a lot of mooning in my lifetime. The last time I mooned anyone was last summer at the resort. I gave my buddy Billie (aka bitch eyes) a very special good morning from across the lake one day. I saw him sitting outside his camper enjoying a cup of coffee. I waited until I knew he was looking and down went my shorts. When I looked back at him, he waved and held up his coffee mug as if he was toasting to my ass.

2. Pick an animal the best describes your personality.

I would have to say a dog. I’m cute and cuddly like a dog. I like to eat and take naps. I LOVE to have my belly rubbed. I try not to worry too much about things, much like a dog. I like to poop and pee on the floor. I may hump your leg if it looks good to me. If you treat me well, I will lick your face but if you’re mean to me I might bite your face off.

3. Do you mail out Christmas cards and if so, how do you pick the list?

I used to send out Christmas cards every year but not anymore. When I met Paula, she didn’t send out Christmas cards so I just kinda stopped when we met. When I did send them out, I had friends and family on my list.

4. How often do you wear something sexy to get attention (lingerie, low cut dress, silk boxers, etc…)?

I have a pair of shorts similar to these but in black. I don’t wear them very often. No particular reason for not wearing them very often, I just don’t. LOL

5. Have you ever tasted breast milk SINCE you were an adult?

As a matter of fact, I have. I can’t say that I liked it but I have tried it.

Bonus: Do you like “talking” when you have sex?

This depends on the topic of conversation. If the conversation during sex is about switching car insurance companies or what’s for dinner tomorrow night then I’m not interested. If we are talking dirty talk then HELL YEAH! Tell daddy what you likey!

Double Bonus: If Santa is a guy, how is it that he never seems to get lost?

I have two theories on this one.

1. He has GPS in his sleigh.

Or

2. He stops at various gas stations around the world and has one of his reindeer go in and ask for directions.

Today is Thursday, December 17, 2009.  It is the 351^st day of the year with 14 to go.

Today’s History

In 1903, Wilbur and Orville Wright conducted the first successful manpowered airplane flights.
In 1989, the TV series “The Simpsons” premiered on Fox.

Today’s News

Ooops, I Did It Again
The couple who crashed the White House state dinner wasn’t the first couple to randomly show up uninvited to an event.  A nice Georgia couple accidentally showed up at the White House for a tour a day earlier than they were supposed to.  They didn’t realize what was going on until a White House aide showed them into a room where a lavish buffet had been laid.  The couple was surprised because they didn’t think breakfast was apart of the tour.  The husband told the White House aide that he thought they might be in the wrong place, but the aide told them, “Just go with the flow.”  The couple was properly screened and since they had already gone through background checks for the White House tour, they were allowed inside a buffet that was being held for veterans.  White House spokespeople say it is not unusual for tour guests to be invited to other events if there is room and since the husband was indeed a veteran, there was no harm done.  The couple got to have breakfast with President and Mrs. Obama.

I need them to get it together over there at the White House.  Perhaps I’m a conspiracy theorist but how come the Secret Service is suddenly making all these mistakes?  Has this ever happened before with previous presidents?  Has the Secret Service allowed random people get into close proximity with the president before?  Or is this something new?  They need to get it together.  Look what happened to Italian Prime Minister Berlusconi.

Message G-3
A California father figured that his cell phone bill would probably go up a little bit after he decided to add his 13 year old son to his plan.  He did not expect the bill to be nearly $22,000.  Apparently, the family’s cell phone plan did not include data service (like text messaging and internet), and the boy downloaded 1.4 million kilobytes over the span of a month.  Because there was no data plan, they were charged by the megabyte.  Verizon has agreed to credit the account for the entire amount and the father has also suspended the son’s phone. 

I hope they get a data plan.  I guess they haven’t heard of the unlimited everything plan. For some families the unlimited everything plans are expensive, but I’m sure it’s MUCH cheaper than $22,000.  What if Verizon had said, “Oh well, sorry for your luck!  Bill’s due tomorrow.”

It’s Mine! Not It’s Mine!
A judge in France has decided the argument between two gamblers has gone on long enough and has ruled that the jackpot be split.  The argument started between two friends who gambled together.  They were playing the slots at a casino when the woman put 50 euros into the slot machine but the man was the one who pulled the lever.  She hit the jackpot:  2 million euros which is about $3 million US.  In France, there is no hard rule on who the winner is:  the person who put in the money, or the person who pulled the switch.  The judge decided that the jackpot would be split 80/20.  The woman who put the money would get 80% and the man who pulled the switch would get the remaining 20. 

Her first mistake was not leaving the country for an extended trip.  She left the casino with her payout but her friend later sued.  Three million dollars is not a lot of money in the grand scheme of things, but it’s enough for me to get gone.  Depending on who this friend was that was gambling with me, he would not have got nothing!  Like I said three mil ain’t a whole lot to be giving away $600,000 to someone who just pulled the switch.

Doped Up Daycare
A group of Ohio parents has decided to sue their daycare after they found out the caregivers were doping up the children at nap time.  One parent claimed that their infant child always seemed strangely groggy after she came home from the daycare, but since this was their first child, they weren’t sure if something was wrong.  Caregivers at the daycare admitted that they repeatedly gave children melatonin-laced candy so they would go to sleep at naptime.  The daycare currently serves about 40-50 children, but this does not include all the children that have come and gone.  So far, two workers have been fired, and there is no word on how long this has been going on.  It is alleged that children as young as two months were being drugged and sedated with unauthorized medication.  Many children suffered from headaches, abdominal discomfort, nightmares and dizziness.  Melatonin is a hormone made in the brain to help control sleep, but the manufactured drug is not FDA-approved or regulated. 

You just cannot trust people these days.  What are working parents supposed to do?  The days of single-income families are over, so mommies and daddies have to work to feed their families.  Unless you have one of those jobs that lets you bring your kid safely to work, you’re forced to leave your kid with someone you think you can trust.  Doping up the children so they would go to sleep?  That is insanity.  What if one of the kids had a bad reaction and died or was seriously injured?  Then some of the kids were so young, two and three months old, they would never be able to tell someone what is happening to them or if something was wrong.  The sad thing is that the daycare is merely being sued; no criminal charges have been filed.  This is just as bad as the daycare that accidentally gave the kids anti-freeze instead of kool-aid. 

Dead in the Bed
North Carolina police have arrested several members of a family after a body was discovered in their home.  Police received a mysterious phone call from someone in the home stating that there was an elderly woman in the home who was not breathing and unconscious.  When police arrived, they discovered that the 88 year old woman had been dead for eight months.  Neighbours report the family as very friendly, coming and going like regular people.  There was even a young child who went to school everyday.  Nobody had any idea that the grandmother had died last spring and that she was still in the house.  It is more than likely that the woman died of natural causes, but police do not understand why the family did not report the death as required by law.  There is also no record of any social security fraud, so there really is no reason to hide the woman’s deat.

Didn’t it smell?  A dead body in the house for eight months has to produce some sort of stank that is not appealing.  Then on top of that, there’s a kid in the house and he’s not having nightmares about grandma being laid out in the next room?  Either there is some scandal beneath all this or they are practicing some Incan death culture rituals.  The Incans did not bury their dead, but kept them around the house and talked to them as if they were still alive.  In their culture, the dead had more power than the living.

Joke’s On You
An Australian teen has gotten what she deserves after she decided that it would be amusing to flash drivers from the side of the road.  The girl’s drunken friends dared her to show off her breasts at drivers while she stood in the middle of a busy intersection.  One of the drivers got so distracted that he swerved off the road and hit her.  Luckily, it was because he was so distracted that he was going much slower than the speed limit.  The girl suffered minor injuries after rolling up onto the hood and hitting the windshield.  In addition to being hit by a car, she is also being fine for causing a distraction on a motorway.

What goes around comes around, moron.

Today’s Thought

A fool and his money are soon parted, but you never call him a fool till the money is gone. ~Anonymous

Note:  This one is only for guys. Because there is no point of convincing females on this.

No no..before you people reach any conclusions this post is not a review of the much awaited movie ” New Moon” . It is but the much awaited mockery of it. And if you wonder why exactly we think it deserves a public-pooh-throwing ( PPT- patent pending..screw you microsoft) you will definitely have clarity after you are through reading this.

For starters I am incapable of writing a review for a movie which I cannot and will not watch. The only thing left to do is to blog about why that’s the case.

For re starters…It is the sequel to the book/movie/brain-blender Twilight(a movie I did see in parts. In parts, cause I had to run out to puke for most of the time).

Here we present some of the valid reasons why we can’t and you shouldn’t attempt this movie:

1) I have seen many movies but have not had nightmares about any of them except this time -and that’s even before its release

2)The movie makes a mockery of Vampires(which are super awesome)

–>by portraying them as glittering fairies(which obviously are not remotely awesome)

–>Unlike the awesome vampires that only suck blood the ones in this series only suck.

3)While you are watching the movie and are into the first 10 minutes you will feel a strange sensation. You will soon realize after 5 more minutes that your balls have vanished. Further more, chronic exposure can have even more adverse effects such as losing all manly characters and a sudden liking for (god forbid) pop music.

Here are a few ways that can serve as an indicator if any of your friends has been exposed to Twilight/New Moon

–>He will cease to be he

–>He would be found humming/gyrating to  a Backstreet Boy song

–> He will tell you how awesome the movie is

But worry not. Even if these symptoms do present themselves we are there to help our die hard fans. Here is what to do–>

1)Slap that sucker good

2)Show him the complete rocky/rambo collection followed by Salmaan Khan’s Wanted. ( You may alternatively just show him Jason Stathum’s movie  “Crank” two times in quick succession- this may do some major brain damage though.)

3)By him a nice dress, a pair of shoes and get his name legally changed to a female one.

Joe mooned the audience at the Open Mic reading
the other night at the Millburn, NJ Library.
I knew he had it in him,
I was just hoping that I would never see it.

Joe always complained
about the “Intelligentsia” in the poetry world.
We would go to workshops,
they would give him some mundane topic
and expect that he would write in esoteric terms
that not even a swami could interpret.

“These people would expect lyrical phases
even if the topic was to write about a fart,”
he told me once.
“Some things are just what they are,
and they aren’t lyrical.”

So when he read his poem at the library
about the outhouse
that was on the Western Pennsylvania farm where he grew up
he started to hear some snickers
saw those condescending smiles in the audience
like “here goes Joe again,”
and all of his William Paterson College A.A. bred inhibitions
broke down, he just lost it.
There at the podium he mooned them,
and that just about said it all,
but it didn’t really.

For you see, if certain writers who were acceptable to
the Intelligentsia had done that, it would have been innovative,
avant-garde. They would have put his picture
on the wall at Poets House in New York
written about it in Poets and Writers Magazine.
But Joe had the wrong initials behind his name -
A.A. instead of M.F.A.

So now as we have a beer at Mechlin’s Corner Tavern
Joe asked me about the old poetry haunts
and Mrs. Snooty who black listed him.

Afterwards he jumps into his chauffeured driven limousine,
he now having become quite the cult idol,
much sought after reader,
with his own booking agent, traveling first class
from college to college throughout the United States.

That’s what one minute of fame, on You Tube,
“Mooning the Intelligentsia”, can do for you.

Ray Brown

Joe mooned the audience at the Open Mic reading
the other night at the Millburn, NJ Library.
I knew he had it in him,
I was just hoping that I would never see it.

Joe always complained
about the “Intelligentsia” in the poetry world.
We would go to workshops,
they would give him some mundane topic
and expect that he would write in esoteric terms
that not even a swami could interpret.

“These people would expect lyrical phases
even if the topic was to write about a fart,”
he told me once.
“Some things are just what they are,
and they aren’t lyrical.”

So when he read his poem at the library
about the outhouse
that was on the Western Pennsylvania farm where he grew up
he started to hear some snickers
saw those condescending smiles in the audience
like “here goes Joe again,”
and all of his William Paterson College A.A. bred inhibitions
broke down, he just lost it.
There at the podium he mooned them,
and that just about said it all,
but it didn’t really.

For you see, if certain writers who were acceptable to
the Intelligentsia had done that, it would have been innovative,
avant-garde. They would have put his picture
on the wall at Poets House in New York
written about it in Poets and Writers Magazine.
But Joe had the wrong initials behind his name -
A.A. instead of M.F.A.

So now as we have a beer at Mechlin’s Corner Tavern
Joe asked me about the old poetry haunts
and Mrs. Snooty who black listed him.

Afterwards he jumps into his chauffeured driven limousine,
he now having become quite the cult idol,
much sought after reader,
with his own booking agent, traveling first class
from college to college throughout the United States.

That’s what one minute of fame, on You Tube,
“Mooning the Intelligentsia”, can do for you.

Ray Brown

L.A.: Writing is a solitary act. Even when writing with a partner as I do. And for many years, it was something I did alone and kept to myself. I don’t think there were more than a dozen people who knew of my literary attempts. Sharing this information about myself is still a bit unnerving to me. I sometimes think it would have been less exposing if I had decided to moon the people driving on I-94. The motorists on I-94 should all be grateful I decided to reveal my inner self instead.

B.O.L.: Due to a happy fortune cookie accident, I inherited a rare form of synesthesia. I have a never ending supply of (mostly amazing) story lines that wiggle around in my lemon Jell-O flavor brain. Lemon and lime alternate as flavors of the day, along with some cranberry concoction that makes an occasional appearance around the holidays – well worth the wait. Please try not to let my juicy brain distract you, although it’s understandable to be jealous. Anyway, I merrily jiggle on about my delightful, as always fat-free ideas to anyone who will listen. Lisa has no clue how many people to whom I blathered to about our first project, Traxter Baxter: The Curse of the Snithisser, not to mention the countless others I have assured Will Steal for Shoes is already on its way to the best seller list. Heck, I have no idea how many people I’ve accosted either, but trust me, plenty. *disclaimer: no Jell-O was harmed in the actual making of my brain.

LA: A lot of people want to become authors. Many of us have an unpublished manuscript hiding in a sock drawer or on an old floppy disk somewhere. Not many people succeed at becoming published authors. This means our blog could be trumpeting a huge personal failure to the world–should they care to look.

B.O.L.: I am totally unconcerned. I’ve maintained all along that I have “fear of success” issues. Fortunately, both of us will be thrilled to finish a manuscript, let alone get published. Of equal encouragement, I have no doubt that we will be published. I’m willing to pimp Lisa out if that’s what it takes to make it happen. She will thank me in the end. Perhaps that is a poor choice of words.

LA: What I do with my end is my own business. I will not thank the BOL (Body Odor Lisa? Big Old Lisa? Bouncy Oozy Lisa? Boozy Ogre Lisa?)  should she pimp me out, even if she just means as a pen for hire. I do thank all the people out there who have given us words of encouragement. You have made this blog worthwhile from day one.

BOL:  Be On the Lookout  (I’ll also answer to Boogers On Lemons, just for Halloween.) And no, it wasn’t your pen I was planning to peddle, but there’s always that too. I’ve seen your pen, it’s a beaut.

L.A.: I don’t think it’s my pen you have in mind.

So much for an attempt at a moody/angsty/heartfelt blog. Although I’m sure even Butt Off Lisa thanks you all.

Halloween decorating thrives in city and suburb, but people who don’t stray outside the urban limits might be surprised to see the competitive yard decor in rural areas. The canvas is bigger; a witch on a front door doesn’t fly far in making a holiday statement. But if you can incorporate a little off-color humor AND a harvest theme — well,  you’ve earned some local buzz. This cheeky display is north of Bloomsburg in Columbia County, Pa.

birthday party, ljubljana, october, 2009

The art of mooning is something I hold very close to my heart. I’d like to think that between the ages of 8-18, I was as prolific a mooner as there was in Logan County, Ohio. Sure, most kids have mooned people at some point during their youth. However, I mooned so often that most times my bum had a sun tan. I was fearless, and I didnt discriminate. I mooned young people, old people, friends, strangers, rich folks, and poor folks. I mooned people in different towns, and even different states. If I could have been paid for it, I’d be retired today.

What set me apart from most mooners was my courage. Not only did I moon people passing by in the cars beside us, I mooned people behind, and in front of us. Chris Weiser will tell you that the day he towed his Chevette to the junkyard, my butt prints were still burned into the passenger side of his windshield. But I never limited myself to only cars. I mooned from houses, school buses, roadsides, and even highway overpasses. The highway overpass was the optimal location to moon law enforcement vehicles. But I would recommend “working up” to that type of activity.

My infamous mooning career nearly ended almost before it started. Like most kids growing up in rural Ohio, I rode a school bus to and from school every day. Obviously, the very back seats were the most coveted seats on the bus for various reasons. One of those reasons….was mooning. By our 4th grade year, the Hart brothers and I had managed to score the back seats. One day however, my bravery got in the way of due diligence, and I thought my life would change forever. We were stopped outside Middleburg one day when a sedan pulled up behind us. I sprung into action! Without warning, my buns were firmily pressed against the back window. It was cold, and immediately I could feel my well tanned skin tighten, but the excitement I got from mooning that unsuspecting car was intoxicating. The Hart brothers and I celebrated my new conquest. We could carve another notch in the backseat! I suppose curiosity overcame me though, and I turned to see what the victim looked like, hoping to get a good look of the terror on their face. But to my terror, the face in that car was all too familiar. My victim that afternoon, was my Aunt LuAnne. That was the first time I thought that my life might end. Lucky for me, she either didnt recognize those sun-tanned butt cheeks, or she chose to keep it our little secret, but never a word was ever mentioned about it.

I’ll surely never forget that day nearly 25 years ago. And I’m sure she never will either. She needn’t worry about a repeat of that day however, I’ve been retired from competitive mooning for several years now. I’m glad to say, my bum is as white as it’s ever been.

Now That is a dumb ass!!!

Julia Laack from Sheboygan, Wisconsin, will probably regret her actions when she sobbers up. After stealing a beef jerky and a lighter from a convience store Ms Laack was visited by police. Refusing to come to the door, she began yelling at her three kids before stripping down to her undies.When the police tried to calm her down she kicked one in the balls and spat in the other ones mouth, screaming she couldn’t be arrested because she was naked. Wrong! As a last act of defiance, as she was being driven away in the squad car she whacked her naked butt up to the window and mooned.

Oct 13, 2009 BERLIN – A GERMAN man mooning at railway staff in a departing train got his trousers caught in a carriage door and ended up being dragged half naked along the platform, out of the station and onto the tracks.

The 22-year-old journalism student shoved his backside against the window of a low-slung double-decker train when staff forced him off in Lauenbrueck for travelling without a ticket, a spokesman for police in the northern city of Bremen said.

‘It’s a miracle he wasn’t badly hurt,’ the spokesman said on Monday. ‘This sort of thing can end up killing you.’ Instead, dangling by his trousers, the man got pulled along for about 200 metres, all the while managing to keep his legs away from the wheels of the train.

The ordeal ended when a passenger pulled the emergency brake. Rescues services were called in, causing rail services between Bremen and Hamburg to be suspended for over an hour, delaying 23 trains.

The man – unharmed except for cuts and bruises – now faces charges of dangerous interference in rail transport, insulting the train staff, and may face sizeable a compensation claim for the delays he caused, police said.

‘He was full of remorse when I talked to him,’ the spokesman said. ‘And he advised others not to try the same thing.’ — REUTERS

“Nobody wants to see a round woman.”
- Karl Lagerfeld, designer, in reaction to a top-selling German fashion magazine banned professional models from appearing in the mag in favor of “real-life women”

Dove’s Real Beauty women are not going to like that comment.

“She is a stunning example of the cartoon form.”
- James Jellinek, Playboy’s editorial director, on the decision to make Marge Simpson the cover girl for its November issue

I’ll be canceling my subscription now.  

“Let’s not pretend they’re a news organization like CNN is.”
- Anita Dunn, White House communications director, blasting Fox News; she called the network the “research arm” of the GOP

 “FYI Liam doesn’t have a twttr & he wants ME 2 delete mine w/ gd reason.”
- Miley Cyrus’ final Twitter message before deleting her account at the request of her boyfriend Liam Hemsworth

The Twittosphere lost a good woman today.

I’m in my place. I’m the Speaker of the House, the first woman Speaker of the House. And I’m in my place because the House of Representatives voted me there.
- Nancy Pelosi, in response to House Republicans who said Gen. Stanley McChrystal should “put her in her place” for opposing an increase in troop levels

“Love the dude, but all he’s done on the peace side of things is make a few nice speeches and not go to war with anyone else.”
- Ibrahim Assem, a portfolio manager working in Cairo, on President Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize

I do have to agree it’s a bit premature to honor him with such a prize.

“The only way to get somebody to stop crowding the plate is to throw a fastball at them. They move.”
- Robert Gibbs, explaining why the White House has been snapping back at folks and organizations that have been making claims it believes are false

“It’s a miracle he wasn’t badly hurt. This sort of thing can end up killing you.”
- A German police spokesman, after a train passenger who was mooning railroad workers got his pants stuck in a door and was dragged 600 ft.

Karma is a real bitch.

“I won’t let my daughter near a boy who doesn’t have a latrine.”
- Usha Pagdi, an Indian mother requesting that her 18-year-old daughter’s suitors’ homes have toilets; the government recently launched a “No Toilet, No Bride” campaign

I wonder if the government has an AOR for that campaign.

A German man, angry at being put off a train because he had no ticket, did something rather rude….He pulled his pants down and planted his bare buttocks on the door of the train – a practice known as “mooning” – as it pulled off, giving the staff a view they will never forget.

That’s when things went terribly wrong for him. See the story below:

BERLIN (Reuters) – A German man mooning at railway staff in a departing train got his trousers caught in a carriage door and ended up being dragged half naked along the platform, out of the station and onto the tracks.

The 22-year-old journalism student shoved his backside against the window of a low-slung double-decker train when staff forced him off in Lauenbrueck for traveling without a ticket, a spokesman for police in the northern city of Bremen said.

“It’s a miracle he wasn’t badly hurt,” the spokesman said on Monday. “This sort of thing can end up killing you.”

Instead, dangling by his trousers, the man got pulled along for about 200 meters, all the while managing to keep his legs away from the wheels of the train.

The ordeal ended when a passenger pulled the emergency brake. Rescues services were called in, causing rail services between Bremen and Hamburg to be suspended for over an hour, delaying 23 trains.

The man — unharmed except for cuts and bruises — now faces charges of dangerous interference in rail transport, insulting the train staff, and may face sizeable a compensation claim for the delays he caused, police said.

“He was full of remorse when I talked to him,” the spokesman said. “And he advised others not to try the same thing.”

(Reporting by Dave Graham; Editing by Louise Ireland)

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Today is October 13.  It is the 286th day of the year with 79 to go.

Today’s History

In 1792, the cornerstone of the executive mansion, later known as the White House was laid during a ceremony in DC.
In 1999, the JonBenet Ramsey case was dismissed after prosecutors said there was not enough evidence to charge anyone with the girl’s death.

Today’s News

Thrice Fried
In a strange accident, a family of three were electrocuted and killed as they tried to put up an antenna.  The mother, father, and 15 year old son were all holding onto the antenna when it fell over and hit a power line, sending 13,000 volts of electricity through the antenna.  The mothe died at the scene and father and son were pronounced dead as they arrived at the hospital.

Sometimes it seems like someone really has it out for you.  That sounded like some Final Destination type stuff.

One Way Or Another
A German man who had been booted off a train for failure to buy a ticket, decided to moon the train conductors and ended up being dragged for about 200 meters.  The man got on the train and was asked to leave after it was discovered he hadn’t bought a ticket.  When he got off the train, he dropped his pants and pressed his butt up against the window to moon the train conductors.  The train started rolling and his pants got caught on something.  The train dragged him for 200 meters, but he was able to keep his legs from rolling under the train wheels.  Another passenger on the train saw what was happening and pulled the emergency brake.  The man now faces several charges including interference of rail transport.  He may also have to pay a large fine because the train was delayed for more than an hour and caused 23 other trains to be delayed.  The man says he is sorry and doesn’t suggest that anybody else try this at home.

I guess he figured one way or another he was going to get his train ride, whether he was inside the train, running alongside it, or hitched to the side.  This guy could have been killed or seriously injured.  I can’t imagine being dragged by a train is a fun way to die.

I Shall Have My Vengeance
An Indian man who was in court for stealing a ceiling fan has confessed to killing at least 11 women because another woman refused to marry him.  The man had been arrested after he was caught stealing a ceiling fan from a mosque.  While he was being questioned in court, he randomly said that he was responsible for the deaths of 11 women in the area, whose murders all remained unsolved.  The first woman he killed was the wife of his brother in law.  The other women were all aged 17 to 35.  He would lure them in by telling them he was interested in marriage.  When asked why he killed these women, he told the judge because he had been rejected by another woman 15 years ago.  He said out of vengeance he would kill 101 women.  He did not say whether he had killed that woman or not.  The man is now married with two kids, but he said he has never forgotten his vow and began killing the women in 2007.

See how people are not wrapped right?  So this woman rejected him.  That’s most unfortunate, but you see he was able to find another woman and start a family.  Why did he feel the need to continue this “vow” and kill these other women who had nothing to do with the first woman?  Perhaps I could see if he started killing off her family, or maybe even her, but random women who had nothing to do with that initial rejection.  How does that even make sense, and on top of that, he was at the court because he stole a ceiling fan and then he just came out with, “Yeah, I killed 11 women.”  Uhm… I hope they have the death penalty over there in India and since it’s a third world country, I hope it’s gruesome and inhumane.

That’s My Ride
A Kansas man has been arrested after he stole an ambulance during a night of drinking.  The ambulance was parked in an area where there are plenty of bars and specialty shops.  The crew was responding to an emergency when a random guy came out of a bar and jumped into the ambulance.  He led the police on a brief, low-speed chase through the small town.  When he eventually stopped he told police he took the ambulance because he had no other way of getting home.

Uhm… first of all, why would you think that it’s okay to take an ambulance?  Secondly, if you are drunk, why are you trying to drive at all?  But then again, most drunks are never rational.  I just can’t see me stumbling out of a bar and into an ambulance.  How am I going to explain why an emergency vehicle is parked in my driveway?

Porn and Viagra:  The Necessities of Life
A store in Detroit has been closed after it was discovered the employees were allowing customers to purchase alcohol, pornography and Viagra with their food stamp cards.  Customers could also get cash if they allowed the store employees to charge an excess amount to the card.  The employees would then file for reimbursement with the U.S. Government in a scam that resulted in more than $100,000 in two years.  All three employees have been arrested.

So, you do know that food stamps are only for the basic necessities of life.  There are serious restrictions as to what type of food you’re allowed to buy.  You can’t get Froot Loops, but you can get Fruit Rings.  So you mean my tax dollars are hard at work so someone can get his rocks off?  Thanks.  Thanks a lot.

Me and My Best Friend
A Houston man has been arrested on drug charges after he was found sleeping in a closet with a dead body.  Apparently, both men had been doing drugs some time that day and eventually found themselves in a closet.  One man fell asleep and the other one died, although the cause is not immediately known at this time.  Initially, the man who was still alive was charged with abuse of a corpse, both those charges have been dropped.

Well, isn’t that disturbing?  But first of all, I need to understand why they get in the closet in the first place?  Yeah, I know when you’re on drugs you don’t really make a lot of sense, but what was it about a closet?  So you climb up in the closet and one man falls asleep while the other one dies.  Did the guy die before the other guy fell asleep?  He was like, “Aww, man, my friend died.  Well, anyway, I’m tired.  G’night!”

Today’s Thought

Nobody holds a good opinion of a man who holds a low opinion of himself.  ~Anthony Trollope

A German man mooning at railway staff in a departing train got his trousers caught in a carriage door and ended up being dragged half naked along the platform, out of the station and onto the tracks.

The 22-year-old journalism student shoved his backside against the window of a low-slung double-decker train when staff forced him off in Lauenbrueck for travelling without a ticket, a spokesman for police in the northern city of Bremen said.

“It’s a miracle he wasn’t badly hurt,” the spokesman said on Monday. “This sort of thing can end up killing you.”

via Train drags German mooner half naked along tracks – Yahoo! News UK.

A german man thrown off a train for travelling without a ticket was not best pleased. To demonstrate his displeasure he dropped his trousers and ‘mooned’ the officials on the departing train.

Bad mistake !!!

His trousers got caught in a door and he was dragged, bare-arsed, 200 metres along the platform, out the station, and on to the tracks, before a passenger stopped the train by pulling the emergency brake.

Fortunately, he wasn’t badly injured – suffering mostly cuts and bruises, and acute embarrassment.

As a result of his cheeky protest, 23 trains were delayed and he now is likely to be charged with -

‘dangerous interference in rail transport, insulting the train staff, and may face a sizeable compensation claim for the delays he caused’

Bit of a bummer that, eh ?

Perhaps he would have been cheaper to buy a ticket !!!

Source . . .

A German man mooning at railway staff in a departing train got his trousers caught in a carriage door and ended up being dragged half naked along the platform, out of the station and onto the tracks.  The 22-year-old journalism student shoved his backside against the window of a low-slung double-decker train when staff forced him off in Lauenbrueck for travelling without a ticket.

There’s an image to conjure with – a young guy being dragged along by the seat of his pants, baring his backside to passengers, and all the while managing to keep his legs and feet away from the train wheels.  I vote that this activity be developed into an endurance sport.  Whole teams could take part.  Imagine an eight carriage train, with a guy fastened into each door.  First one to put his feet down is the loser.  Great spectator sport too with all those windows.

OK, the perils of mooning railway staff. Sometimes you get your trousers caught in the carriage door and you end up being dragged half naked along the platform, off the station and onto the tracks. A 22 year old German student decided that since he had been thrown off the double decker train because he didn’t have a ticket he would give the staff something to remember him by. So he pulled down his pants and planted his butt up against the window.What he wasn’t expecting was the doors to close on his trousers. He was left dangling from the doors, naked from the waist down, for about 200m before a passenger pulled the emergency brake. Hmm, embarrassed much? Now the student faces charges including interference in rail transport and insulting the train staff, ooh with the added bonus of paying compensation for the delay he caused. All and all not a good day!

Mooning German dragged half-naked by train

A German man mooning at railway staff in a departing train got his trousers caught in a carriage door and ended up being dragged half naked along the platform, out of the station and onto the tracks.

The 22-year-old journalism student shoved his backside against the window of a low-slung double-decker train when staff forced him off in Lauenbrueck for travelling without a ticket.

Full Story>> Metro.co.uk

A German man mooning at railway staff in a departing train got his trousers caught in a carriage door and ended up being dragged half naked along the platform, out of the station and onto the tracks.

The 22-year-old journalism student shoved his backside against the window of a low-slung double-decker train when staff forced him off in Lauenbrueck for traveling without a ticket, a spokesman for police in the northern city of Bremen said.

“It’s a miracle he wasn’t badly hurt,” the spokesman said on Monday. “This sort of thing can end up killing you.”

Instead, dangling by his trousers, the man got pulled along for about 200 meters, all the while managing to keep his legs away from the wheels of the train.

The ordeal ended when a passenger pulled the emergency brake. Rescues services were called in, causing rail services between Bremen and Hamburg to be suspended for over an hour, delaying 23 trains.

The man — unharmed except for cuts and bruises — now faces charges of dangerous interference in rail transport, insulting the train staff, and may face sizeable a compensation claim for the delays he caused, police said.

“He was full of remorse when I talked to him,” the spokesman said. “And he advised others not to try the same thing.”

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