If you are at work, at school, using a mobile phone… most of the time the sound of the device is muted!

With this in mind I had an idea. People often look at movies (YouTube, Vimeo, …) without any audio. But hey, don’t forget you are still downloading the audio data, that you don’t listen to!

My idea:

Modular streaming video to save bandwidth

Software that detects if your sound is enabled or disabled. While requesting a movie you can tell that website “hey I don’t have any audio enabled, just give me less data”. The website streams you just the data module without the audio data. When you enable sound while the movie plays you could just request the audio module and play it synchronized together with the movie.

This would require a modified piece of software (for example Silverlight) that could detect OS settings, a site that supports all this and a technique or new file format for movies that could split the audio from it.

This would be such a bandwidth saver for many people. Resulting in a faster downloads (websites like YouTube are loading slow on mobile devices!) and less traffic for servers. Servers would need to calculate a little bit more but with todays technologies that couldn’t be the problem.

If any (big) company reads this. Please give me some credits or contact me. Hah!

So far my idea

Check out the trailer and then check out the movie:

Quinton Aaron as Michael Oher; Gabourey Sidibe as Precious Jones. Images from allmoviephoto.com.

Yesterday, I saw both “Precious” and “The Blind Side”, the former based on the novel Push by Sapphire, the latter on the book The Blind Side: Evolution of a Game by Michael Lewis. While I could spend days attempting to dissect the pyschological, sociological, and socioeconomical aspects of both of these powerful films, I just want to touch upon a few impressions that have lingered:

1. Above all else, these were stories about 2 children. They may have been 300+ pounds and their harsh *childhoods* may have aged them prematurely, but they were nonetheless children. That so many adults in their families and in society failed them is astounding to me, especially when you consider that there are many more impoverished children in America just like protagonists Precious Jones and Michael Oher.
2. Though both these children were very large in stature and thus were in society’s collective “face”, they truly lived in the shadows, virtually ignored by all around them. We see what we want to see, no matter what horrors are right in front of us.
3. In both cases, were it not for the help of 1 or 2 incredibly key people early on, these children would not have survived to tell their tales. In the case of Precious, it was the principal who went out of her way to enroll the teen in an alternative school; for Oher, it was neighborhood man “Big Tony” who—in trying to get his own son into a private school—took Michael too, knowing that attending private school on an athletic scholarship would be both kids’ best chance at a quality education. You just never know what kindness you offer today might change someone’s life tomorrow.
4. Of course, I have to touch on the race issue. I have read many articles about both movies and have chuckled at many of the reader comments I’ve seen. Overall, the black community doesn’t look too good in either movie as a whole. But you have to realize that these portrayals are small slices of the larger black pie, and that both of these books-turned-movies were based on true stories. Had the Hollywood machine created these movies as works of fiction, then OK, as a black person, I might have cried foul. But reality is what reality is, and often it is ugly. Particularly in “The Blind Side”, it would be easy to write the movie off as ‘white family rescues black teen from the hood’, but you can just as easily view the movie the way I did: a caring family saw a CHILD alone on the streets at night and offered him shelter. The rest as they say, is history.
5. Finally, I would be remiss if I didn’t thank my good friend Joni—creator of the blog ‘Politics from the Eyes of an Ebony Mom’—for getting me to see “Precious” at all. I’ve had a pretty tough life emotionally myself, and I wasn’t going to touch this movie with a 10-foot pole. As I always say, “I don’t need help getting depressed.” Because I’m a Ravens fan, I knew I’d see “The Blind Side” eventually (Oher was drafted by the team this year), but I had no intention of seeing “Precious”. But Joni’s review heightened my curiosity so much so that I was compelled to see this great film.

Any person not living under a rock knows by now that New Moon has been released this weekend– while shattering the single day domestic box office record and the midnight screening record on Friday (per MSNBC). Evidently, 87% of the advance ticket holders were women. 87%! Consider also that the Twilight Saga was first written by a woman, followed by a female-written screenplay which was then directed by a woman (well, the first installment)– could this mean anything for women?

Over at Broadsheet, Kate Harding was wondering about this, if it could be a feminist triumph. Basically, women are showing themselves to be a major force to be reckoned with when it comes to the box office and Hollywood should take note and start making more movies that appeal to women.

Hellz yeah! Many, many, many more films should be made (written, directed, generally worked on) by women. For fuck’s sake, women only hold 19% of film jobs!  This is appalling but do I want Twilight used as a benchmark for women-made/oriented films? ABSOLUTELY NOT.

The whole saga of Twilight, besides being, in my opinion, anti-feminist, plays right into all kinds of antiquated ideas about women and what they want. Women will only go to see a movie about a love story (preferably one involving the ”romantic” notion of love at first sight). Women need men in their lives to feel complete, safe, happy. Women want the dangerous guy who will protect her and make decisions for her. Women really want to get married young and skip college. Women should (or would just be plum happy to) ditch their friends and family and any kind of life of their own to be with a man.

What about strong female characters that won’t tolerate a boyfriend who ignores her wishes? Or who don’t want to change their lives to suit their boyfriend’s? Or who don’t want to get married and have children? What about female characters who have goals and desires and interests of their own that don’t have anything to do with a guy?

Unfortunately, New Moon is demonstrating that a whole shit ton of women still want some dramatic, sweeping love story (with a vapid heroine and a super hot, controlling hero). But this is by no means defines or suits all women’s tastes, just like bromances don’t epitomize all male relationships. More women need to be involved in the film-making industry, in writing and creating projects that give voice to the varied experiences and interests of women everywhere. Vampires optional.

A response to boxcarman123 on YouTube. Bridge!!

Synecdoche, New York

Charlie Kaufman, 2008

C

I recently joined Get UR Good On, and have been planning this holiday dinner for women in children at a shelter. It was my first time doing this, but will not be my last. I such a great time and everyone was so nice! The best part of the night was seeing everyone smiling!

Release Name: Gamer.DVDRip.XviD-DoNE

Filename: gamer-done

Size: 706.83 mb

Genre: Science-Fiction/Fantasy

Starring: Gerard Butler, Michael C. Hall, Chris “Ludacris” Bridges, Kyra Sedgwick

Sinopse:

Num futuro próximo, os jogos virtuais e o entretenimento evoluíram para um assustador novo híbrido. Os seres humanos controlam-se uns aos outros, em grande escala, e em jogos com múltiplos jogadores online: pessoas jogam com as vidas de pessoas verdadeiras… por puro prazer. A tecnologia capaz de controlar mentes encontra-se em cada esquina, e o coração dos jogos controversos e seu criador, é o isolado bilionário Ken Castle (Michael C. Hall). A sua última concepção, o videojogo de tiros no primeiro que aparecer, \”Slayers\”, permite a milhões executar as suas fantasias mais macabras, online, diante de um público à escala global, utilizando prisioneiros reais, como avatares, com quem lutam até à morte. Kable (Gerard Butler) é a estrela e o herói de culto dos violentos \”Slayers\”. Kable é controlado por Simon, um jovem jogador com o estatuto de estrela de rock, que continuamente desafia todas as probabilidades, levando Kable a alcançar a vitória a cada semana que passa. Arrancado à sua família, encarcerado e forçado a lutar contra a sua vontade, o gladiador, dos dias de hoje, tem que sobreviver o tempo suficiente para escapar ao jogo, libertar a sua família, recuperar a identidade e salvar a humanidade da impiedosa tecnologia de Castle.

Links: Homepage – Trailer – IMDB -

On 27 July 2005 at 8:30 am, the observatory at Santa Cruz in north Mumbai recorded a rainfall of 94.4 cm during the previous 24 hours, while the Colaba observatory in Mumbai’s southern tip recorded barely 7.3 cm in the same period. Rainfall over Vihar lake was 105 cm, even higher than Santa Cruz. The previous record of heaviest 24-hour rainfall over Mumbai was 58 cm for Santa Cruz and 37 cm for Colaba on 5 July 1974. Comparatively speaking, only Santa Cruz broke the previous record, but for Colaba the rainfall was in no way unusual. However, the Mumbai rain event of 26 July 2005, as it is now referred to by meteorologists, was unusual in that in that it affected life in the metropolis in a never-before manner. Hundreds of people lost their lives, drowned by the deluge, fatally trapped in cars, electrocuted, or caught in the debris of collapsing buildings. The rains literally brought the city which never sleeps, to a standstill.

Meteorologists know that such phenomena do occur once in a way and they are called extreme events. But this was perhaps the most extreme of extreme events and it generated an extreme reaction among meteorologists, primarily because it had not been predicted. They held seminars, workshops and brainstorming sessions to analyse every aspect of the situation and to see if the event could somehow have been predicted or if a similar future occurrence could possibly be predicted. Climate change enthusiasts seized it as another opportunity to reinforce their claim that the climate has changed. Environmentalists blamed it all on the neglect of the environment.

It is now the turn of the moviemakers to take a look at the Mumbai rains from their own viewpoint. The Hindi film, Tum Mile, was to have been released on the fourth anniversary of the Mumbai rain event, but the release got postponed to 13 November 2009 when Mumbai had just been recovering from its brush with cyclone Phyan, which thankfully did not cause much damage or loss of life and had dissipated quickly.

Tum Mile begins with a shot of the campus of the University of Cape Town where Sanjana (Soha Ali Khan), is campaigning enthusiastically about the environment and climate change. Just when she is beginning to attract an audience, there is a sudden sharp shower that disperses the listeners and drowns her hopes as well. But in the background is Akshay (Emraan Hashmi), an aspiring painter, who falls in love with her at first sight. The film is full of flashbacks, but if the story is to be straightened out, it is just that their love grows, they decide to live together, and are generally happy, but when it comes to marriage, things begin to break apart and Sanjana and Akshay go their own ways. Six years later, they meet each other by coincidence on a flight to Mumbai, and by coincidence again the day they land in Mumbai happens to be 26 July 2005, the day of the deluge. At Mumbai airport they part ways to do what they have come to Mumbai to do. But they are both stuck in the rains and they do not reach their destinations. Instead they meet on the streets of Mumbai, wade through waist-deep water, rescue other people, and save themselves out of impossible situations. By the time morning breaks, they have rediscovered their lives and their love and stand wondering why they had ever separated at all.

The film begins with the mandatory notice that the characters in the film are fictitious and that any resemblances are coincidental, etc. But there were two things that struck me hard while watching Tum Mile. One was that throughout the film, which had quite a lot of actual and make-believe footage, it appeared that people in Mumbai on that dreadful day, were fighting their battle with nature almost on their own. There were hardly any shots of the police, fire brigade, or ambulances in action or even in the background.

But apart from that, what struck me more was the perception of the story writer and the director of the film about the meteorological office. In fact, the opening shot of Tum Mile is that of what it called the “Weather Department (Mumbai)”. It shows the staff on duty busy playing carom. The place is dimly lit, but there are computer screens flashing data and images in bright colours. What could be a satellite picture shows an ominous cloud formation. One of the duty staff notices it when he happens to pass by the computer screen, but the others tell him not to worry but concentrate on their game of carom. There is a suggestion of informing the airport, but the idea is dropped. The day would be just another rainy day for Mumbai and nothing unusual was going to happen, is what they all feel. There is a second shot of the “Weather Department (Mumbai)” later in the film, in which the staff is taking a fresh look at the images and data. They are now shown to be amazed by what they see and there is a talk about giving a warning, But by that time, it is too late.

Yes, the legal notice in the film says that any resemblances are purely coincidental, but it would be worthwhile for meteorologists to ponder about what people think of them and their forecasts in today’s world with its advanced technology, apart from the jokes and cartoons that have always been there about them.

– R R Kelkar

22 November 2009

Over the past few weeks I have read many reviews of the movie Precious. Most if not all have been complimentary, but then there was Armond White of the New York Press. He wrote a scathing review that compared Precious to the infamous 1915 drama Birth of a Nation. That is quite the comparison. I saw Birth of a Nation in college and if featured unflattering portrayals of black people with the roles being played by white people in blackface. White said “not since The Birth of a Nation has a mainstream movie demeaned the idea of black American life as much as Precious. Full of brazenly racist clichés (Precious steals and eats an entire bucket of fried chicken), it is a sociological horror show. Offering racist hysteria masquerading as social sensitivity, it’s been acclaimed on the international festival circuit that usually disdains movies about black Americans as somehow inartistic and unworthy.” Precious does not demean the black experience in reality it embraces a part of the black experience that we don’t see. It exists but it is not only invisible to the mainstream it is also invisible to large segments of the black community. The real truth is we don’t want to see it. it is far too raw and too painful for most of us to deal with. Precious removes the veil and we are forced to look at some raw truths. It is ironic that the title character is over 300 pounds and she seeks to blend in. She does not want to be seen, but her size makes that dream impossible. We see a person, a child  struggling in an existence that most would find futile. Her struggle is reminiscent of the mythological character Sisyphus. His task was to push a huge rock up a hill with the full knowledge that it would come down again, and he would have to repeat the process. That is the life that Precious had a 24 hours of struggle with the promise of 24 more the following day. Sometimes when you don’t see something you can choose to believe it simply does not exist, but sometimes you are brought face to face with some truths that you do not want to accept. Sometimes you attach some insidious logic to why this truth is exposed. The purpose of Birth of a Nation was to instill fear in the majority. The images were designed to affirm the fear that black power spelled the end to life as they knew it. Precious had no such agenda. Precious is the story of a girl who lived a horrible life and then one day a light came into it, it was not a bright light but it was just enough to give Precious a glimmer of hope and that is what this girl yearned for.

As the economy rolls along like a marble on a pebble beach and the stock market continues its own bumpy road to recovery, apocalyptic thought is again on the rise. It is when times are bad that apocalyptic comes in most useful. Individuals who feel that this world has run out of possibilities generally look to a new future world where things will be radically different. That’s why people flock to movies like 2012 and dream of a new day, a new era.

That’s the way it has always been. Jews being tortured to death under Antiochus IV Epiphanes, the Seleucid tyrant, looked for that day when Michael would take on the “Prince of Persia” and the new world would gush in and overtake this one. Almost two centuries later the early Christian movement, suffering at the hands of Roman emperors such as Nero and Diocletian, reveled in the visions of Revelation — the new world coming. Rental property is free in the New Jerusalem! The earliest exemplars of apocalyptic thinking appear to go back to the ancient Zoroastrians. This early Iranian religion (which may have originated in Afghanistan) took comfort in a dualistic world where good and evil constantly struggled until a cosmic conflict would result in the ultimate destruction of evil. It helped to explain why things could be so bad for good people in the here-and-now.

2012, however, derives from concerns that the Mayan calendar seems to have run out of space at that time slot just over three years from now. Otherwise intelligent people panic; this is an apocalypse of the secular kind! Experts on the Maya (among which I am not) explain that the Mayans use(d) many calendars (there are still Mayans around). Their large-scale, 5000 year calendar may run out on December 21, 2012, but that doesn’t mean the end of the world. In fact, that calendar only began on August 11, 3114 BCE, about 4.5 billion years after the creation of the earth. It was not meant as a road-map to the cosmos. The real apocalypse is in the minds of those suffering from their own private ills in this world. Ever since Zarathustra spoke, people have had an alternative, better future to anticipate.

Inglourious Basterds (2009)

Quentin Tarantino among all other things, is an entertainer. WWII, is one of the most tragic events in history, but Tarantino some how manages to make it fun. Inglourious Basterds is a fun film, it’s tremendously entertaining, shocking, dramatic, suspenseful, and funny at the same time. Jam packed with everything you look for in a movie, done with that certain Tarantino style, it’s worth being checked out. It’s time to experience for yourself what war is like through the eyes of Quentin Tarantino.

[IMDB link] [Netflix link] Carolyn HAD rated this 2 stars on Netflix and didn’t remember it from being a kid. I *think* I may have seen it, but absolutely NOTHING in it rang a bell, so I COULD be wrong. Parthena said it was one of her fave movies as a kid, so she got to watch it with us.

LIMERICK REVIEW: There once was a fantasy called Willow.
A baby found floating in a river — D’oh!
Keeping it alive was a pain.
To the queen, it was a bane.
A sorceress is quite a formidable foe.

HAIKU REVIEW: Willow’s a midget?!?!?!
The things you forget with age!
Nice to revisit.

PEOPLE: Directed by Ron Howard (the narrator from Arrested Development!), written by George Lucas and Bob Dolman. Val Kilmer certainly makes the ladies happy, but he was still better in Real Genius. Did you know Joanne Whalley (Sorsha) was a groupee in the Pink Floyd movie? Her career is still going, but I don’t think she’s done anything as well-known as Willow since then. Nor has she ever looked as good, judging by her IMDB pictures. Maybe that’s why Val Kilmer divorced her? (OHHH, I totally went there.)

The baby (Ruth/Kate Greenfield) was actually the best baby actor I’ve ever seen–which really just means they spent many hours photographing it until it did the right things. And they were never in a movie again… And little people. Tons of little people, and some of the standard familiar faces. This is the most little people in any movie since The Wizard Of Oz, and they had to advertise nationally to get that many. (Some trivia: At a party, I once saw a little person smoking pot, asked around, and she was friends of some friends and had been an Ewok in Star Wars episode 6: Return Of The Jedi. So I’ve seen an Ewok smoke pot! Who else can brag about this?)

QUIRKS: Most of your standard fantasy movie tropes apply here. Formulaic to a tee; yet exceeding expectations and out-doing many of the similar movies that came out in the early 80s. More of these quirks are discussed in the “SIMILAR MOVIES” section below, where I compare it to Lord Of The Rings.

There are two Wilhelm Screams in this movie.

And some mis-treatment of babies.. always a plus. lol

And some comic relief from the 2 “very tiny” people, the Smurf-sized “brownies”. They really reminded me of the worms from Worms 3-D (the X-box version, not the PS2 version).

VISUALS: The fantasy world here is much richer than most 1980s fantasy movies. Closer to the caliber of the Lord Of The Rings movies in terms of having a rich world filled with many different kinds of creatures. Special effects have come a long way since then, but they still did a good job.

MORALS: Even reluctant tiny people can be heroes. But we all knew this when we read Lord Of The Rings…

BAD STUFF: The only thing bad about it is that it was kind of “generic” in the sense of following many established tropes for Fantasy movies. But this movie didn’t win out (versus the others) in uniqueness of ideas, it won out by executing these ideas in a better way. It doesn’t get boring like Legend. Solutions to problems are, as usual, “conveniently convenient”, but not as badly as in other movies.

CONCLUSION: I think by re-watching it I bumped it up from 3 stars to 4 stars on Netflix, and up to 7/10 on IMDB. After seeing so many sub-par fantasy movies like Legend and Krull … It’s nice to see one that is better than a “generic pass”.

RECOMMENDATION: Fantasy lovers and 80s movie lovers should definitely watch (or re-watch) this.

SIMILAR MOVIES: Lord Of The Rings!!! I was cracking jokes the whole time about how ever character was almost directly analogous to a character in Lord Of The Rings. The Nelwyns are the hobbits. Willow is Frodo. The baby is the ring. Bad people in horses come after them like the Nazgul. A “fellowship” is formed. Cherlindrea is “Galadriel” and gives “Frodo” (Willow) a magic wand instead of a strand of her hair, and then gets really creepy just like Galadriel talking about how horrible she could be if she had the ring. The Brownies are the “elves”, only 2 inches tall but still able to take you via bow & arrow in the middle of the forest. The “orcs” are simply a human army. Val Kilmer/Madmartigan is Aragorn. Bavmorda may as well be Sauron (and didn’t land another movie role for 12 years, until she was “The Queens” in Monarch). Nockmaar may as well have been Mordor; Tir Asleen may as well have been Minas Tirith. And there’s even a dragon, like in The Hobbit.

It is also of course somewhat similar to a lot of the 80s fantasy movies that came out, like Krull, Legend, The NeverEnding Story, or Labyrinth. And has parallels to Star Wars as well.

MOVIE QUOTE: Cherlindrea: Elora Danan must survive. She must fulfill her destiny and bring about the downfall of Queen Bavmorda. Her powers are growing like an evil plague. Unless she is stopped, Bavmorda will control the lives of your village, your children, everyone. All creatures of good heart need your help, Willow. The choice is yours.

COINCIDENCES: Supergirl, Willow. 2 1980’s movies in a row with love potions.

FRIENDS’ RATINGS: Christie and Chris H/Lisa loved it. Ian & Tatiana really liked it. Christian H & Jordan & Benj liked it. Chris Z didn’t like it. Becky hated it.

Mood: full
Music: Kreator – Awakening Of The Gods

Going to the films is still one of the most favorite past-time of most people. But it’s not that affordable anymore, especially if you count in the nibbles you are going to get, the meals you’re going to have after, and how many you are in a group that’s’s going to see a flick. That is the reason why more and more folks are now looking for alternative ways on how to get discount movie tickets. If you are one of those folks, these techniques might be in a position to help you get the savings you’re craving for.

* Theater internet site – first and most important, before you go ahead and check out other sites, take a look at the main website of the theater first because most of the time, there are truly superb deals that you’ll be able to find. Also, if you’re a student, you can get automatic deductions just by presenting a valid ID proving that you are a student.

* Local retail shops – stores like Costco also give out coupons and discounts for some picture theaters, so take care that you check the closest one in your neighborhood to discover if there are current deals you can get today.

*Matinee showing – it’s a fact that there are certain hours in the day that picture tickets get more in demand, so hiking its price up. If you would like to avoid this, and you schedule is flexible in the 1st place, decide to get the matinee showings to get the less expensive cost. The kickbacks can range between 40-50% of the original price, so this is perfect especially for those that are going with an enormous group.

Your help to find best current movies @ http://www.movieslore.com
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Double lines wrapping around the building. We were fairly near the front.

So, I got to see the movie opening (mid)night as a birthday present.

Cinemagic - Day Two from the front of the line

Then I went again the next day for the afternoon shows we’d already purchased.

Marysa, Pauline, Me and the Muppet

It was really pretty cool hanging out with girlfriends two days in a row, and  I really enjoyed the movie itself.  Seriously.  I know it’s adolescent and not exactly Oscar worthy,  but none of that matters I still loved this movie.  The metaphors were thick on the ground.  (e.g. Bella asking Carlisle if he ever thought about choosing the easier way (feeding on humans) and him saying something like no he knew what was right.)

I have to say my absolute favorite parts of the movie were when Edward says, “Marry me,” at the end and the credits roll.  The howls that went up from the audience were hysterical!  I was shocked the first time around, but at least had the comfort of having read all the books.  I giggled at the woman who came with us the first night who hadn’t read any of the books (and doesn’t intend to) and looked a little at sea.  She countered my smug remarks about not having read the books by shrugging it off.   She  said her daughter had told her generally how the story went so no biggie.  Yeah, not really a fan.  Those of us who’d read them all still joined in the collective howl!

So my next favorite scene was when Jacob whips his shirt off to use as a bandage for Bella’s head wound.  The heat level in the auditorium rose a few degrees I gotta tell you! Hah!  The audience response was seriously funny.  Great audience participation, which always helps make a movie more fun.

The Muppet, Heidi and June 30, 2010

So the music.  Didn’t like it.  Thankfully it was all background for the movie and I didn’t have to concentrate much on it.  Unlike Twilight which birthed a new song favorite for me (Supermassive Black Hole) I just can’t get into the New Moon soundtrack.  Hears hoping for the next one!

Juvenile, questionable makeup, uneven acting and all, I really had a lot of fun with this movie and can’t wait for the next one!!

Ends with a seven year old saying she doesn’t piss herself any more.

From Julia Powell’s blog

Julia Child began learning to cook when she was thirty-seven years
old. She started because she wanted to feed her husband Paul. She
started because though she’d fallen in love with great food late, when
she did she’d fallen hard. She started because she was in Paris. She
started because she didn’t know what else to do.

Who knows how it happens, how you come upon your essential gift? For
this was hers. Not the cooking itself so much – lots of people cook
better than Julia. Not even the recipes – others can write recipes.
What was Julia’s true gift, then? She certainly had enormous energy,
and that was a sort of gift, if a genetic one – perhaps the one thing
about her you can pin down on the luck of the draw. She was a great
teacher, certainly – funny, and generous, and enthusiastic, with so
much overbrimming confidence that she had nothing to do with the
surplus but start doling it out to others. But she also had a great
gift for learning. Perhaps that was the talent she discovered in
herself at the age of 37, at the Cordon Bleu School in Paris – the
thirst to keep finding out, the openness to experience that makes life
worth living.

She was no bending reed, of course. She had no use for silly,
fear-driven food fads; she could be set in her ways, even mulish, and
when she wanted to she could be withering. That’s fine. That’s good
even. We don’t need saints. Who changes their life under the
influence of a saint? Okay – don’t answer that. But the point is –
Julia was so impressive, so instructive, so exhilarating, because she
was a woman, not a goddess. Julia didn’t create armies of drones,
mindlessly equating her name with taste and muttering “It’s a Good
Thing” under their minty breath. Instead she created feisty, buttery,
adventurous cooks, always diving in to the next possible disaster,
because goddammit, if Julia did it, so could we.

‘Nuff said.