Expectations are a part of us from the beginning of our lives.  We are expected to walk by a certain age, talk by a certain age and progress physically and mentally by the status quo standard.

As we get older the expectations expand drastically beyond our initial basic developmental stages of life. 

The expectations of life come in many forms.  Social expectations come in the form of education, marriage, careers and lifestyle; other expectations in the form of family, religious organizations, children and friends.

As we grow, we develop our own expectations based on our reality and dreams.

Expectations are there; an unavoidable component of life.

Some people can block any expectations put on them by external influences and center themselves and live their life according to their own charted course.

Other people live a heavy, hollow existence; never achieving personal goals nor happiness as all their efforts, energy and time is devoted to meeting the expectations of others.

However, the most dangers of all expectations are the ones we put on ourselves.  Again, some of our own expectations are constructive and force us to push beyond our perceived limits.  Even if our expectation is to meet someone else’s expectation, a person can wind up in a very great place.

It is phenomenal when a person’s reality surpasses their greatest expectations; when they are soaring high above their highest dreams; happier than they could ever have imagined possible; with a feeling of fulfillment; being grounded yet with the sensation that the sky is the limit.

But what happens when reality is not only not what we expected but is worse than ever imagined and life feels as if it has a continuous cloud over it?  I am not talking about the cute Charlie Brown rain cloud either.

This zone is a very gray area where expectations meet reality.  This is where our spirit, our mental health, our back bone, our integrity and everything that makes us is affected.  This zone charts where we wind up mentally, emotionally and eventually physically.

This zone can be treacherous if we don’t know how to handle life’s disappointment when our expectations don’t materialize, when we are not able to attain the dream or when the reality is nowhere near the expectation or is less or opposite of the expectation. 

I was reflecting on the irony of how we always have such great expectations and how no matter what we do, how much we plan at the end of our life journey we can never have everything 100% as we expected.  More often than not it is “better than what was expected”, “worse than what was expected” or “nothing like we expected”.

Even when something is just as we expected, that generally carries negative connotation.

So, I have to say that I have to agree whole heartedly with Charlotte Bronte when she quoted:

“Life is so constructed, that the event does not, cannot, will not, match the expectation”

Ciao! M.O.

Here are some other quotes about expectations that I found interesting:

“The best things in life are unexpected – because there were no expectations.”  Eli Khamarov

“Don’t lower your expectations to meet your performance. Raise your level of performance to meet your expectations. Expect the best of yourself, and then do what is necessary to make it a reality.” Ralph Marston

“Never idealize others. They will never live up to your expectations. Don’t over-analyse your relationships. Stop playing games. A growing relationship can only be nurtured by genuineness.” Leo F. Buscaglia

“To expect defeat is nine-tenths of defeat itself.” Henry Louis Mencken

“Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting a bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian” Dennis Wholey

“Keep high aspirations, moderate expectations, and small needs” William Howard Stein

“It is generally known, that he who expects much will be often disappointed; yet disappointment seldom cures us of expectation, or has any effect other than that of producing a moral sentence or peevish exclamation” Samuel Johnson