En nu met allemaal

Tonight on my way home, I encountered my tube nemesis. I regularly encounter this rude gentleman on my way home – he gets on at Holborn and gets off at Liverpool Street, which is on my way home. He is aged around 50 years old I estimate, and I’ve never met someone as self-obsessed and openly maligned.

He will always persist in shoving people out of the way on the tube for his own personal gain and inconveniencing everyone at every possible account, wherever he can, however he can, to whoever he can – a reflection, he tells me angrily when I confront him (no one else will stand up for themselves), on his own life. He denotes proudly that selfishness is the only virtue that will get anyone anywhere, that it is the only way to live. How wrong he is. And how poorly this reflects on humanity.

If all humans thought as he did, they would speed up our species’ self destruct button, taking the rest of the ecosystem and the planet with it. If humans will not look out for each other, who will? Not a sky God keeping things ticking over from above – no. Humans have evolved to live differently from other animals, who collectively DO live selfishly in this manner in the animal kingdom in order to survive. Although it is often painted that way, human society does not have to reflect the animal kingdom in that sense. There is no one looking after us, no master plan in nature – merely what we have around us.

As one of the only fully self-aware species in a world faced with SO many global problems, it is alarming that people can be so extravagantly destructive of themselves and everyone around them. The way this man has lived his life – in a completely selfish manner as he so loudly proclaims – is a horrific example of this.

I’m no do-gooder. And certainly no preacher. I find no gratification in those things. But to encounter someone actively living such a destructive life like that just astounds me. He will consume and destroy, and no doubt his children too, until he dies, and leave behind a large footprint for those he’s selfishly passed his genes onto to suffer the consequences. Or maybe they will grow to assume his life stance, and also consume, have more children who’ll consume, and have more children…

So, he is my Tube Nemesis. Not in the sense that most people describe (i.e. “I always see X person and we always dash for the last seat!”) but in the sense that I cannot stand his ideals and aggressively destructive, intrusive, loudly offensive way of life. He is just one person. But how many more are just like him? I don’t  know.

I end this blog with a cynical video about the consequences of having children and being selfish. Pretty closely related to my encounter today, presented in a light hearted manner – but something I feel strongly about. And now, I return to my Management coursework for my adult learning class, feeling a little better after blogging this.

1 of my Favorite S197 Mustangs in Atlanta owned by a good friend.  I have seen the car go from a stock mustang with STEEDA suspension bits.  To a Novi Supercharged 500hp joyride, and has a real mean look from all angles.  George got a little photo session from CF Photography.

CF Photography

Picture Thread on Import Atlanta

Humans have been telling stories to each other since time immemorial. They serve a deep psychological and sociological need. Let us examine a few key concepts:

WHAT IS A STORY?

Quite simply, it is a journey of inter-connected events with a beginning, middle and an end providing

• dramatic fulfillment
• education
• knowledge
• entertainment
• emotional stimulation and,
• a satisfying conclusion (we love closure)

Stories began as visual medium when our forebearers painted images on cave walls. or drew with sticks in the sand. They were accompanied by words or grunts. As complex language developed, stories were increasingly verbalized, and later on written. Stories today can be exclusively composed of images, written words or speech, but often times are a combination. Cinema is primarily a visual medium, with a lesser proportion of words (dialogue). Television is more dialogue based than cinema in general.

A story must have a purpose. For instance, the Australian Aboriginal woman at a rock formation called “The Devil’s Marbles” in the Northern Territory told stories to keep youngsters away from these rocks to avoid danger. A story can be as dry as a depiction of actual events or “life-like” events. Even fantasy fairy tales emulate “life-like” events through suspension of disbelief. Whatever dungeons and dragons we use, the events in a story must feel authentic .

Stories also need a theme (exploration of the human condition). What topics or concepts is your story exploring? Racism? The power of the human spirit during disaster? Love always triumphs over evil? Revenge? And the list goes on. This has been discussed in an earlier blog in the 36 dramatic situations by Georges Polti.  Be careful that you are only exploring one central theme and perhaps one or two minor ones. Otherwise your story loses focus which must be found.

In order to make a story compelling, there must be a protagonist (hero), a goal, a dilemma, conflict, an antagonist (nemesis) and a moral (leading to growth) to create a complete experience. And more importantly, an audience. Stories help us communicate with each other, and add meaning and enrichment to our lives. They bring people together through sharing and help us evolve and grow stronger.

Dramatica defines story as a grand argument dealing with a problem or an inequity. Huh? Basically, it raises the issue of a hero with a conflict as they are yanked from their natural world through a critical or inciting incident, and how they go about solving it.

During a recent seminar by Jen Grisanti (a Hollywood writers’ consultant and wonderful person too), she spoke of the importance of finding your story. What is the writer specifically trying to say? Why are they taking up her with a series of events? Is your story too episodic? What do you want your audience to get from watching your film? What message are you trying to convey to your audience?

The movie “Tootsie” spent close to a decade in development until the writer Larry Gelbart finally decided that ‘Tootsie” was a story about a man who had to become a woman in order to better understand them and himself. It wasn’t so much a story of desperation, the lengths people go to to make it as an actor, or about a guy liking to dress up. Consider “What Women Want” with Mel Gibson and Helen Hunt which was essentially the same story with body rather than clothes swapping.

Jen Grisanti sees stories as media for building communities. Pretty powerful stuff. A good story must have clarity and must be relevant to the times. How does the story make you feel? These are primal concepts, but difficult to nail down. It must also possess deeper symbolism to have a greater impact on us. She sees the important aspects of raising the emotional stakes in a story as being

• anticipation
• expectation
• participation
• surprise and,
• a delayed payoff

WHAT IS A PLOT?

A plot is simply the way a story is executed, or a cause and effect series of events. A road map. It is the mechanics of your story; how the sequence of events are put together. Many writers confuse the two and think writing event after event constitutes a story, especially in action films. Is your plot linear, non-linear or avariant? Classic examples of unconventional plotting include “Memento”, “Reservoir Dogs” and “Run Lola Run”. Plot also relates to structure, the most common being the Aristotelian three act structure. Is there a clear concept or story idea, which is more specific than a theme? Good versus evil isn’t a story concept.  Is there a well defined central/main character with a clear motivation, goal, a dilemma and obstacles. One way to enhance your plotting is to consider what is the worse case scenario if your main character doesn’t achieve their goal. The ultimate failure to achieve a goal is death.

Subplots are secondary or tertiary storylines. Some readers have complained that, because a writer hasn’t really found their story, some subplots are actually more intriguing than the main plot. It happens in unpolished scripts. Even to me! Another problem I recently grappled with is my choice of main character to drive the plot. In the end I switched the boy to a girl (literally not surgically) and everything fell into  place.

FINDING YOUR VOICE

These are the less tangible qualities that define you as a writer. Jen Grisanti claims that many newer writers lack a distinct voice which distinguishes them from other writers.

This is a difficult process of self exploration. It means that we need to delve deeper into our psyches than ever before. She made us define a critical or life changing incident where the rug was pulled from under our feet and we are forced to deal with a new reality. Sound familiar? In doing so, we help shape our characters which are products of our creativity and therefore ourselves. Imagine placing your profile on a social website. Think of how you would describe your personality? What are your likes and dislikes? What do you value most in your relationships with other people? Certain patterns will emerge which define you as an individual. Are you easy going? Wound up tight? Chatty? Pensive? Conventional? Alternative? Think about how a producer might discuss what qualities you possess as a writer. If a project is greenlit and a producer is looking for a writer and they say “This project is perfect for xxxx (insert your name)”, it’s because of your voice.

Part of finding your voice involves common themes in the stories we like to tell. Are we animal lovers? Philanthropists? Comedians? Feminists? Optimists? Cynical? Interested in human suffering? Are your characters strong, successful people? Are you strong and successful or do you aspire to be? Are characters underdogs? What is their disposition? Happy? Smarmy? Cheerful? Quirks?

Finding your story and finding your voice is rather like wanting a quick definition of the meaning of life. The only way to find it is to keep searching. And the search lies in the writing. So what are you waiting for?

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Implant pentru Refuz, sau Implant for Denial cum îi place să îşi spună mai nou, cu cel mai recent videoclip la piesa Nemesis, filmat pentru a promova relansarea Monolith cu noul titlu OtheRoots la EMG Germania.

În momentul încărcării acestui post, nu erau 1.000 de vizitatori!

Este încărcat de două ori pe YouTube, linkul acesta a fost încărcat de regizorul Daniel Dorobanţu în 7.11.2009 şi avea 800 accesări. Al doilea venea de la casa discuri EMG Germania şi avea 350 accesări.

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04:30 ger jag upp och tassar genom rummet, donar mat till råttorna, sätter på kaffet och tar mina barfota fötter längs det kalla golvet fram till fönstret, öppnar upp, virar filten hårt om mig och andas in morgonens nikotindos. Ljuvligheten i mörkret och tystnaden smeker mig och lugnar sinnet. När ljuset börjar sticka mig i ögonen vill jag helst inte gå ut längre. Det är mörkt i min lägenhet 24h om dyngnet. Stimulikänslighet till den grad att jag inte kan sortera, någonting, alls, alla sinnesintryck bombarderar min hjärna dagligen, konstant. Sådan har jag varit sedan barnsben, vilket kan förklara varför jag alltid helst har suttit i mörkret och läst framför allt annat i livet. Jag gillar vintern för att det är så mörkt, men jag avskyr kylan, jag gillar sommaren för att det är härligt att kunna sitta ute barbent mitt i natten, men jag avskyr värmen på dagarna. Våren är min favorit, vackert ljummet, brisar som smeker kinden och man kan känna kittlet i näsan av alla dofter när blommarna börjar vakna till liv igen.

Jag är trött, utmattad, orkeslös, tömd… För ett år sedan var jag ute oftare, gjorde mer, nu är jag sämre, det har gått sakta nedåt. Jag är ensam det mesta av tiden, jag behöver det, jag orkar inte med att umgås, orkar inte prata, inte svara på frågor…

Skalar av, river upp, läker men det kommer mer kaos, nytt kaos, till synes utan slut, sväljer mig, sliter, förlamar, konstant ångest, skrik i huvudet och jag vill krypa ur mitt eget skinn och gömma mig i ett hörn.

Är inne på min fjärde månad av usel sömn. Behöver inte ens gå in på vad det gör med min hjärna, äm mindre med mina känslor. Det är handikappande som det är, nu slår det mig på käften varje sekund.

Undrar om det var en bra ide att ta upp min abnorma fascination för mord, blod, våld, tortyr, skräck, slasher etc för min terapuet. Han såg så ypperligt bekymmrad ut. Inte för att det finns någon anledning för honom att oroa sig, är inte direkt våldsam av mig och jag har faktiskt ett samvete, till viss del iallafall. Men något i hans blick sade mig att det kanske inte var det smartaste jag gjort…

Champions announced yesterday their upcoming Nemesis dungeon. This is a new lair for end-game players who are members of UNITY. It seems pretty interesting, and it ties more of your characters personal villian into the game which is nice. I’m still not seeing a hell of a lot of end-game available to me yet in game, which is still my biggest disapointment with the game. I want to have something to strive for in a game, and CO doesn’t give me that in the slightest. I’ll keep chugging away at the game, and will cap out soon I hope. I just got done with all I possibly can on Monster Island, and have to do the Lemuria Crisis now (if I can find an instance with more than just me in it…).

Here be the promo I was talking about for the last couple of weeks. Listen to it for all the details, one to post tomorrow as well. And probably the day after that, and the one after that two. Got to get all these things out thank to my nemesis and his delay in getting me the lines.

Here be the promo I was talking about for the last couple of weeks. Listen to it for all the details, one to post tomorrow as well. And probably the day after that, and the one after that two. Got to get all these things out thank to my nemesis and his delay in getting me the lines.

In preparation for my purchase of J.J. Abrams’s reboot of Star Trek on blu-ray, I’m revisiting the film that made all of the other sequels possible: Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. I try to watch this film once every couple of years, and it never disappoints.  I came late to the Star Trek party overall, not being a fan of the original series and only being a casual watcher of TNG in the 90’s.  My mom is the Trekker of the family.  Back when mail order VHS tapes were the rage, my mom bought every Star Trek episode that Time Life offered.  They’re still piled in her closet to this day.  I watched Star Trek: Generations and Star Trek: First Contact when I was in junior high, and at the time it was only because I liked sci-fi action.  I followed the TNG films through the years.  I didn’t think Insurrection was that bad.  The film just felt more like a long episode of the TV series.  Nemesis was a good try, and there are some very good acting moments, but it just felt like another TNG series finale.

It’s 2002, and I had pretty much given up on the Trek.  When First Contact premiered on Special Edition DVD, I went to Best Buy to pick it up, and I also saw that Paramount had released a Special Edition of Star Trek II.  All of my trekker friends insisted that it was the best film in the series and that I was crazy for never seeing it.  I don’t like to be looked at as crazy after all, so I picked it up on a lark.  I don’t usually buy DVDs sight unseen, but I had a good feeling.  Thank Starfleet that my feeling was right, because right away I was hooked.  I was 21, yet I felt like a 10 year-old again.  Every room on the Starship Enterprise looked like a swinging 70’s bachelor pad strapped to a warp drive.  The early special effects were bright and interesting.  The acting was classic.  Nimoy may have been the talent, but Shatner was the charm.  James Horner’s score was lively and made the scenes even more fun.  The action sequences were large and reckless, yet had the timeless poise of an old sea epic.  If Shakespeare were alive, he might have been a script doctor on this film, especially for Khan’s dialogue.

Those pecs aren't corinthian leather, but that outfit sure is.

All in all, Star Trek II renewed and expanded my love for the Star Trek series.  Every time I come across the original series on TV, I watch at least a few minutes if not the entire episode.  TNG is a bit more involved, and I’ll only watch it if I catch it at the very beginning.  In addition to the TNG films, I’ve now seen Star Treks II, IV, and VI.  I’m planning on writing a review of the odd numbered Trek films very soon.  I’m a little afraid, since I’ve heard less than positive things about them, but that’s what makes writing about them so fun.

Måste sätta mig och skriva skolarbete, två ska vara inne om lite drygt 1,5 vecka och har prov då också, jag håller på att få en jävla panikångest attack. Varför varför varför lär jag mig aldrig att jag faktiskt borde sluta med att alltid komma på att jag ska göra saker i sista stunden, gärna natten innan? Inte för att det i sig skulle göra så mycket nu, har ändå sovit uselt i flera månader. Sömnbrist + Instabil Nyx = KAOS. Fast det säger väl sig självt egentligen. Alla blir lite knäppa av sömnbrist, jag blir bara helt jävla störd i huvudet av det. Och inga mediciner kan jag ta mot den heller, för *trummvirvel* jag har blivit resistent mot ALLT. Inklusive neuroleptika. Ironiskt skrattretande. Saker som klubbar de flesta känner jag inte ens av, och inte kan jag få något mot min ångest, är resistent där också, haha, funny, not.

Pratade med modern min i telefon i går, hon sa att hon tycker jag är oerhört stark att jag orkar plugga trots allt kaos och sömnbrist. Jag känner mig inte stark, jag har bara gett mig fan i att någon jävla gång ska jag faktiskt klara av gymnasiet och inte hoppa av som jag gjort alla de andra gångerna, någonstans, någon gång vill jag faktiskt kunna säga att jag har avslutat något. Dock är jag så oerhört van att byta jobb, utbildning och yadi ya konstant att faktiskt ha rutiner och mål som jag kanske kommer att klara är scary shit. Då blir jag ju ta mig fan vuxen och jag känner mig allt annat än vuxen… Kan inte fungera som en vuxen med ett känsloliv som pendlar mellan en trotsig femårings och en rebellisk tonåring alternativt inget alls.

Vill inte. Orkar inte. Kan inte. Borde. Måste. Ska. Orkar inte orkar inte… vill bara begrava mig under täcket men men skolarbete här kommer jag… Skjut mig…

Dusky shadows settle on her white skin,
A drifting contrast: Nemesis, queen of
Saviours and destroyers, madmen and
Half-mortal heroes. She smiles on them all.

Fail. Fail. Fail.

Fel. Fel. Fel.

Fet. Fet. Fet.

Jag är fel, allt är fel, allt blir fel. Jag vill inte, kan inte, orkar inte känna. Vill inte slå över. Handlingsförlamad och utmattad efter terapin i dag. Har jag gått för långt? Har jag trängt undan så hårt, flytt så mycket att jag aldrig kommer att komma tillbaka till mig själv, mig själv med känslor? Vill jag känna igen? Jag har inga svar. Och för någon som vet så mycket så vet jag så oerhört lite.

Ana funkar inte, bladen funkar inte, inte alkoholen, inte drogerna… Jag kan inte fly mer, men jag kan inte känna heller, apatisk 27 åring. Ironiskt. Jag skrattar så jag dör men helst av allt vill jag bara gråta mig till sömns, men jag kan inte, kan inte sova, kan inte gråta, kan inte känna och det sliter mig i stycken.

Error: Nyx cannot shut down due to internal hard-drive failure.

Alabama Smith is back in an all-new time-twisting adventure involving powerful relics that could alter the destiny of mankind! Join Alabama and his girlfriend, Anastasia, in Alabama Smith in the Quest of Fate. Hunt for the elusive Crystals of Fortune using the Amulet of Time in this Hidden Object game. Jump back and forth between the past and the present to solve mind-bending puzzles, search for cleverly hidden objects, and stop a shadowy nemesis from finding the crystals first!

Gorgeous graphics

Mesmerizing minigames

Find the crystals!

System Requirements:

OS: Windows XP/Vista

CPU: 1.0 GHz

RAM: 512 MB

DirectX: 7.0

Hard Drive: 147 MB

It Takes Just A second To Say Thanks,

It Takes Longer To The Work On This.

Alabama Smith In The Quest Of Fate

SALU2 Y BIENVENID@S TOD@S NUEVAMENTE A ESTE ESPAZIO

- VER EL VIDEO EN GOOGLE -

INFORMATE Y DESPIERTA

DESPIERTA Y RESISTE!!!

X-RAY

!!!

In the usual boredom of class my minds started wandering, to times not so much behind – they were just two years ago..

I am not so sure why, but I convinced myself that I’m depressive, I remember those long times which I just thought of my death, not suicide, but death.
which always made me cry, not about myself, I never feared death, but because of the scenarios in my mind of my mother crying, and my family over my body.
It’s not that I didn’t have suicidal thoughts, I did, but they weren’t as common as other thoughts about my death.
Maybe the real reason for this is that I wanted to know what people think about me? how will I be remembered? who will come to my funeral? who will be sorry that I’m dead?

In most persons thoughts like that won’t come by themselves (I think), there was a special circumstance that I think most people don’t have. it was the dawn of the nemesis.
He was a normal guy, he lived on my street, just around the corner, and we were great friends. we liked almost exactly the same things and I learned a lot from him, especially on stop motion animations.
Things changed with time, and I stopped seeing him. Even worse – he decided he hates me.

why? I don’t know, I don’t think anyone knows, I don’t think he himself knows. This, by itself, as weird as it sounds, had probably already happened, a lot, but I was an easy prey because of my social anxiety. Although I don’t think he knew about it, he probably thought I was just a weird loner.

Anyway he went to a vicious crusade, not leaving me any spare moment.. Even though it wasn’t that harsh, he haven’t stalked me or did anything to hurt me, he just made laughing at me his main hobby.
Quite depressing isn’t it? As you can guess, I did exactly nothing against it, one time  I cursed him- but he laughed at it, and everything went back to “ordinary”
It’s not just that I haven’t defended myself – when I brought playing cards to school, for example, he almost always joined. Of course I didn’t wanted him to join, and I really really wanted to tell him to go search for his friends, but the sad truth is that I just couldn’t..

I wasn’t handling the beast by myself, my few friends – mostly from kindergarten, were there for me, they haven’t done much, but at least they tried doing something while I sat quietly absorbing everything instead of defending myself.
Maybe without those few friends, I would have been pushed outside of the borders and would lose everything..

But luckily enough for me I am still here, as I knew I’m going to high school, which have about 8 times the amount of pupils, and I will be able to get away from him.
I was even more lucky, when the year ended and I went to high school he wasn’t there, he went to a different high school.

Today all my depressive thoughts have gone completely, and even though we live on the same street I haven’t seen him or heard from him for the last one and a half year.
though I know he is still there, and I have the feeling that he will strike again, I just hope I will be ready by then, so he won’t be a problem.

Have You Seen Smallville: Season 6 Episode 19 – Nemesis?

Episode Synopsis:

After Jodi Keenan, the wife of a Special Forces soldier, sets off a pipe bomb in one of Lex’s secret labs, Lionel is severely injured and Lex is taken hostage by the enraged spouse. Claiming Lex kidnapped her missing husband, Jodi threatens to blow up the entire lab with Lex inside unless he tells her where her husband is. Lex naturally denies knowing Jodi’s husband, Wes, Clark sets off to rescue Lex, but is immediately felled by the kryptonite lining the earthen walls. Lex and Clark realize the only way they will make it out alive is by helping each other before the bomb detonates. Meanwhile, Lionel reveals to Lana why he forced her into marrying Lex, which leads her to investigate Lex’s secret research of his ‘Project 33.1′ research as well as his work in tracking down the Phantom Zone escapees to capture and use one as part to create his army of ’super-human’ soldiers.

So what do you think of this episode?

If you missed it, you can watch it here.

Glorious Nemesis, Daughter of Nyx
Bearer of the Wheel of Fortune,
I hail thee and give thee honor
for you give mortals a reverence for law and
the fear of committing an unworthy action.
You are their conscience,
working hand in hand with Shame.
Director of human affairs
for restoration of equilibrium,
measuring out happiness and unhappiness.
He who is blessed with too much
is visited by you with losses and sufferings,
in order that he may become humble
for there are bounds to human happiness
which cannot be exceeded safely
as it leads to arrogance and error.
Therefore you check the extravagant favors
conferred upon man by the shining divine.
You hold the power of fate
which sooner or later overtakes the reckless.
Adrasteia who belongs to all and none,
mirror image of Aphrodite,
sometimes grave and serious,
other times laughing and merry.
Your union with Zeus yielded a wondrous egg,
Hidden by your command for Leda to find,
from which sprang Helena and the Dioskouroi,
who both cheered and saddened her days.
Hail Lady of Fate who bears
apple and ash on the left, sword on the right.
I pour your libation from the patera,
as I gaze upon your victory crown.

Dörren vibrerade, jag tittade förvirrat omrking. Vad orsakade det? Kände på den vita badrumsdörren, smekte fogarna, tassade in i lägenhetens enda rum och stod tyst och lyssnade, huvudet på sned och tänderna fastbitna i underläppen. Ingenting rörde sig, allt var lungt förrutom råttornas sedvanliga “ge oss frukost” spring. Hade jag inbillat mig? Jag både såg och hörde dörren röra på sig, men såg jag det egentligen? Jag ser skuggor på väggarna, på golvet och när jag snurrar runt för att se ta tag i dem så försvinner de. Sömnbristen har satt sina spår och gnager sönder min hjärna, knutar i hop logiken till en trasslig gummibandsboll och jag känner mig som en tidsinställd bomb, atombomb… *boom* Och så utrotas världen i min närhet. Överallt känner jag närvaro, av någonting, jag sover med lampan i hallen tänd. Eller ja, sover är att ta i, ligger i sängen och drömmer verklighetsdrömmar och dränker mina lakan i svett är mer rättvisande. Minnet av en hel natts sömn suddas ut och ålarna slingrar sig ur mina händer. Jag försöker greppa men glider på de hala stenarna, naglarna trasas sönder och lämnar blodiga spår, det enda synliga i min nedåtgående spiral. Snurrar runt runt evigt evigt… Lever inte, överlever, sliter, slåss, går sönder, lappar i hop, vrider sönder, slår, bankar… Jag vill ut! Jag vill ut! Lungorna och halsen tar i av all i sin kraft men ingenting hörs, ingenting syns och ingen frågar, för så länge man inte är blödande eller står med pistolen mot tinningen är det ingen som lyssnar när man äts upp innifrån och försvinner, tynar, dör långsamt…