Maney met his son Dean for the first time yesterday when his wife Amanda gave birth for the first time.

Cass, Croghan and Tijana have a group therapy session with Drex this morning because they feel that he is upset his baby thunder has been stolen.

Charlotte ladies call in with their very own stories about when their baby thunder was stolen — listen now.
[cbs-audio url="http://cbskiss951.files.wordpress.com/2013/04/drex-stolen-baby-thunder.mp3" size="340 px" download="true" name="Baby Thunder" artist="Drex and Maney"]

You kinda stole my thunder

— Alyssa Bartlett✨ (@LyssAshley75) April 19, 2013

I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato.

— Funny Tweets (@FunnyOrTruth) April 23, 2013

This is original artwork from a truly talented friend of mine who is also a professional artist and cartoonist. I asked him to come up with a logo for madgeandbird.com and somehow he drew what was in my head. Thanks to Patrick Folkes for giving madge and bird some character.

Madge and Bird have been sleeping through the night for the past month and a half, and it has literally changed my life. I was just thinking today about what it felt like those first two months when they ate every three hours during a 24 hour period. During the day I was at work, but at night…dear God I felt like a zombie. I would try to remind myself that there are people in the world starving, homeless, sick, dying, suffering and here my problem was that I was “really tired.” Then after a month more of waking up at 1 AM from going to sleep at 11 AM, feeding the twins for an hour, then going back to sleep at 2 AM just to get back up at 4 AM I immediately felt my troubles were equal to those listed previously. There were certainly times in my life prior to Madge and the Bird where I thought I was tired. I was wrong. The version of tired a new parent feels is far beyond any other version one could suffer. Now that’s over. Now we feed Madge and the Birdman around 11 PM and they sleep until 9 AM the following day. It’s a miracle. For the first two months there were moments where I thought to myself, “Why on earth do parents elect to re-enter captivity again after they overcome the early infancy of their current hostage takers?” The answer is three things. First and foremost, and part of the captivity that is even remotely inconvenient or tiring is immediately undone when you see your little hostage taker smile or look at you. Secondly, that two months feels like two years, but it isn’t and once it’s over and you’ve survived things do get better (when I complained to other parents of slightly older children, including a friend with triplets they assured me the pain would be short lived and I cursed them for lying to me). Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, you finally understand what most of our parent or parents went through for us and you know why. By the time most of us are ready to have that second or in our case third hostage taker we’ve been far enough removed from the initial shock to think it’s a great idea. We forget that on the first night we brought them home and had to care for them by ourselves things were so crazy and overwhelming that by 8 AM the next day when our own Mother finally and mercifully arrived to assist we answered the door in a blood soaked white t-shirt from the stress induced spontaneous nose bleed we conjured up somewhere between 3 and 4 Am. While we are not entertaining the idea of any additional hostage takers in the near future, I know we’ll join the countless other hostage parents in this world who go back to the well over and over again somewhere down the road. In the mean time, I’m stocking up on t-shirts. Only this time they’ll be in red.

This should be fun!

Whatever the reason THE MOST IMPORTANT PART is that you had the opportunity to choose the perfect home FOR YOUR FAMILY from a myriad of options.  The decision wasn’t made for you by some unknown entity (a Probate Judge if you don’t have a Will, I’ll get to that in a minute) and the choices were not limited by a fill in the blank questionnaire (on-line Will template, again more to follow).

Just like your home, your Will and the Attorney who drafts this very important document should be personal TO YOU.  Your legal advisor should show you all the neighborhoods (planning options) and be willing and competent to take you around because (1) she cares and (2) she is very familiar with what parents usually want and can give you an honest pros and cons review showing you everything, not just the homes with the biggest commission (quickest estate planning).

Your Will is like your house.  You can decide; how detailed or streamlined it is, how many contingencies to address now or how best to allow for “room to grow” in the future, how much money you feel comfortable setting aside to keep the planning up-to-date.  You can furnish your estate planning house with tax planning provisions and even personalized drafting to address a special needs family member (caring for a medically fragile child or elderly parent).  You can set aside space for family pets and make personal gifts of family keepsakes.

The Attorney who builds your estate planning home should also be a “perfect fit”.  She should be personal, professional and make the process painless.  You want to find someone who is going to listen to what you really want and help you design a plan and pick a neighborhood that fits you rather then forcing your family to fit into a structure that you would never have chosen, had you had the choice.

Your Attorney should be someone who will be patient and show, explain, and educate you about the whole estate planning process, from the foundation to the chimney.  Find out if your attorney offers that educational building block as a courtesy (as I do) or if they bill in minute increments.  What if you decide to add on in the future?  What will the cost for that be?  What happens if you lose your key (original estate planning documents), which I always give to my clients? Will your attorney help you with that as well?  Is a flat rate possible (what does it include?) or is the drafting done on a room-by-room basis?

Parents want what is best for their children. All too often, parents put off estate planning because they think they don’t need it, they think it can wait, they think they can’t afford it, they incorrectly believe all attorney services are the same, or they simply don’t know where to start.

I’m happy to help you begin your journey.  Please never hesitate to give me a call.

Looking forward to meeting you,
Michelle-Shari

-Monday, April 22, 2013-

Everything has been going really well lately.  I’m now 31 weeks & 3 days now. Last week was good though.  Got a bunch more baby clothes from my sister, another friend of mine is giving me all of her little boy’s clothes too. We’ll definitely be set for awhile!  Got a baby care timer, we’ll see if it’s really useful, seems like it will help a lot. Made our straw mattress- different but really comfy! We both have slept so much better.  Also got a diaper bag, 100% cotton, yess…

Little Auguste is getting so big, he’s now gaining 1/2 pound a week.  Weighing around 3 pounds now and about 17 inches long.  His immune system is getting stronger, preparing for the outside world.  His little noggin’ could be covered with hair by now, and if he’s anything like his Mommy and Daddy I’m sure it is!  His kicks are so strong now.  I can see my belly shift around and jump quite visibly.  My sister, niece, sister-in-law, and of course, Dustin are the only ones who have felt him move.  Sometimes I can feel him stretch and then slide his arm or leg down or around.  That’s a new feeling! Different than the normal punches and kicks.  It’s kind of getting harder to breath, I can feel him laying on my lungs more now! :/

Dustin has been working again last week for a few days.  I did some sewing, did a stitch in a pontoon tarp for some extra moneys.  Made me excited about sewing again.  I want to try to make some things more.  Maybe some cloth pants for me and Dustin & some baby clothes for Auggie.  Might attempt to make some diaper covers too.  Also had a yard sale last Saturday, it went pretty good.  My sister wanted to make some extra money for my baby shower and all, I made some extra money, maybe $25..not really worth all the work but my niece really enjoyed it.

So we’ve decided to buy a pool to just have in the back yard since the pools around here show no interest in getting their pools ready any time soon.  It will be nice too because we can take Auguste swimming in it this summer. I don’t want to take him in a public pool, and it’s advised not to take them into a lake or river till they are older and their immune system is stronger.  I think it’s important to get them in the water in their first 6 months.  Babies actually instinctively know to hold their breath for their first 6 months, then after that they kind of lose it and have to be re-taught.  Kind of like the whole diaper thing & elimination training.

I have another midwife appointment tomorrow.  It’s been three weeks since I’ve seen her.  I think we will go back to going two weeks now, she’s been running back and forth working at places lately.  In two weeks I have an appointment in Meridian with the vein specialist for a check-up, there’s nothing he can really do for me until I give birth and am not breast feeding.  My veins have spread more though and have been more painful and hot lately than normal so I want to go see him to just be safe.

Just that and sleeping well have become the most challenging things for me.  I made our birth center list the other day, seems like it’s gone by so fast.  I swear everytime I go to write a new blog I still go to type in January or February only to realize it’s already April, almost May!!  I feel like I may be underestimating how easy and smoothly it will all go.  I mean I’m aware of all the hype, but I have not bought into it this whole time.  Trying not to psyche myself out.  It’s worked, plus through meditation and Ina May’s Guide to Natural Childbirth, I have a new found sense of confidence for what my body can do and handle.  I’m excited to experience it, for Dustin to be there with me through it all, to meet our new love, to hold him our arms and kiss his face for the first time.  Nothing can bring me down now.

[Letter to Auguste:  Hello sweetheart, You're getting so big!! I see how much you've grown each day.  You're doing such a good job.  Daddy and I are getting antsy, we're so ready to meet you!..but take your time, you still have some baking to do! I can't wait for the day you decide it's time for you birthday.  We've been preparing things for your arrival and making some big changes, in ourselves and the world you'll get to live in.  I'll be enjoying these last couple months you have in my belly, I can feel your little energy, your spirit. It's so beautiful. We love you hijo! <333]

Belly pictures this week:

We were able to keep the joyous news fairly quiet for the first few weeks, only telling close family and super-close friends. Now we’re ready to let the whole cat out of the bag and share with the rest of the world.

Our little peanut.

We decided on a blog as an outlet to share our adventures through pregnancy and beyond with our family and friends. One of the main reasons is so we’re not cluttering your facebook pages with a million pictures, tales of how terrible I’m really feeling today, and future tales of poo and vomit. This way you only have to read about those things if you really want to!

So here it begins! Hope you’ll have as much fun reading this as I will writing it. Try not to laugh too hard because regardless of how many blogs and books I read, I still have no clue what I’m doing.

Oh! And by the way, our tentative due date is November 17!

These things are all true and legit.

They just are.

“Two of my favorite things, Mommy”

You really need to do/know some things to survive life after newborn. Mostly you need to know some things about leaving your safe little home.

Here are some things I just had to share:

1. When you are ready to be “released into the wild”, take it easy. Pick familiar spots. Like, if you know everyone at the publix (like me), go to the publix. Pick your familiar cashier, even if you have to stand in a longer line or cheat your way through that stupid “1o items or less” line. Talk to the bag boy that you are certain will not steal your baby while he wheels your groceries out to the car. MAKE it a comfortable experience.
2. Know that strangers are going to walk up to you and your new baby. Know that AT LEAST 4 people will ask you how old that baby is. Be prepared for that 1 person that is brave enough to reach their grubby hand into your dang buggy and TOUCH YOUR BABY. There is something about a pristine tiny baby that just screams “touch my hand or face and transfer ecoli from the chicken you just bought onto my germ free little body”. SH*T!!!
3. Be prepared to hear comments that make you want to go all Naomi Campbell with a cell phone on folks. “That baby is hungry”, “Does he not like to wear socks”?, “Oh you’re pumping instead of breastfeeding?”…..The last one gets me. It happens every day almost. Isn’t that strange? That someone, even a stranger would say that?? Listen people, I’m breastfeeding my child. Sometimes I pump BREAST milk into a bottle and feed it to him. It’s still breastfeeding, there is just an extra middle man. He’s exclusively breast fed. Get off my balls. Just simply think what you are thinking, and don’t say it out loud to whoever has decided to question your parenting skills. Deep breaths.
4. Don’t go far from home the first few weeks home. Factor in how long you could possibly be trapped inside a vehicle with a screaming baby.
5. Don’t shove too many errands into one outing. Pick one or two goals, and be realistic in thinking “it’s okay if I only get one of these things done”.
6. Plan your life in 2 hour increments. Think about feeding baby right before you leave the house and start your timer. Know that 2 hours (maybe more maybe less) later you will have a hungry baby and your breasts may be bursting at the seams.
7. Keep a whole pack of diapers and wipes in your car. That way you can pack just one diaper in your purse and know that you are set up for car refills at all times while you’re out. (While you’re at it, stick a pacifier, extra set of baby clothes, extra momma shirt, and a burp rag in there too) You can never be too prepared. Let’s face it, we have had a baby sucking our brains out through our boobs, we forget lots of things.
8. Don’t only bring food for baby. Do yourself a favor and buy purse-friendly munchies for yourself.
9. If you feel like you’re not ready to go out in public yet, it’s fine!! WAIT!! Don’t let anyone pressure you into it, for some people (LIKE ME) it’s a big leap to go back out into public with a tiny human after being safely locked in your home with him for 3 weeks. My indicator to take it slow was an almost complete meltdown over a sandwich that was made incorrectly. I literally had to leave the restaurant because I was about to cry over lettuce being on my sandwich. LETTUCE!!! I didn’t even have my babies with me!!
10. This one is for at home but I’m on a roll, so here: buy snacks or pre made goodies and shove them wherever you spend most of your time. If you’re like me, you’re not going to be cooking yourself lunch every day (actually if you’re like me, you won’t have made yourself a hot lunch for the first 3 weeks). I can’t tell you how many times I have been digging through a bag of cookies at 2-3am while pumping or feeding. The kid has crumbs in his hair pretty consistently.

This is where I feel most comfortable so far, and I think it shows:

Hope this list was helpful!!

XOXO

Bell

When you have a baby, everyone tells you to sleep when the baby sleeps. No one tells you that it’s a-okay to get away by yourself and that you should. But I think every mother should be encouraged to pass over the baby and get the eff out of the house and away from baby duty before they find themselves sitting at the bottom of their stairs exhausted and sobbing.

Plus, it’ll give them something more interesting to talk about than their babies. Note to new moms: we like you, we like your babies. But if we have to hear about their poo one more time, we’re going to stop inviting you to things. Pick up a newspaper.

Around here, it was easy for Drew to get away and have stories about things other than baby poo (and work/bureau-poo). Two days a week he plays soccer. It’s pretty hard to back out of something when you have 15 people relying on you to be there. But, I don’t play team sports and I’m not that committed to my own activities; it was easy to say “I’ll do it later” rather than going to the gym or sit down at my computer and write. Plus, the guilt of telling Aidan that he can’t come with me when he asks is hard to swallow.

No longer neglected, my gym bag is my sanity salvation.

I’ve started scheduling and committing to me-time and I encourage parent staying at home with small kids to do the same.

For me, it means attempting to get up twice a week I get up at an ungodly hour and heading to the gym. It means setting an alarm for the first time since Aidan arrived. It sucks. But it is so worth it when I am back at home and can’t pick either of the boys up because every muscle in my body is on fire.

It also means committing to time on the weekend away, giving Drew time alone with the boys and writing and applying to jobs (hopefully this will end soon) while enjoying a coffee at my local Bridgehead. Aside: Looking for someone who can effectively work Jay-Z lyrics and the word “poo” into interesting narratives? I’m your gal! *awkward finger guns*

Looking to bring the love of Jay into your workplace? Call me! Photo credit: chickswithguns / Foter.com / CC BY-SA

I may not have 15 teammates that I’m accountable to, but  I’m accountable to four people to present, and tear-free when I am at home– lord knows, Aidan’s tantrums produce enough tears for all of us. So I put these activities in our shared calendar and Drew helps push me out the door.

These few hours away helps me make the most of every minute that I’m with the boys. I’m a more relaxed and happy person. And when I’m happy (and caffeinated), everyone wins!

So, new moms/stay-at-home moms/dads/ parents who just don’t get out that much, consider this your permission to put it in the calendar and commit to a few guilt-free hours to do something that helps you recharge. It’s one of the most important things that you can do.

After the countless false alarms and being sent home every single appointment with a nice “you’re cervix is closed TIGHT” comment, I really just figured that everything remained the same.

They weren’t.

I had started to finally dilate.

I probably asked the doctor if she was just kidding about 10 times before heading to labor and delivery. I’m pretty sure that even though it’s her job to deal with pregnant women, she was glad to finally get this baby out of me.

At 0900 I was getting settled in labor triage and texting John to not even bother going into work. The nurses were nice enough to let me power shave my legs in the sink before they put in my IV. After the IV, I continued to put makeup on and paint my nails PERFECTLY. They’ve never turned out as good as they did that morning!

As I laid there in the triage room, I wasn’t scared. It was the strangest thing.

Once you’ve experienced a semi-traumatic birth, you have something to compare to your second, and it was night and day from when I had Harper. You can read about that birth story HERE and HERE. I just drifted off into thinking about how stressful of a situation Harper’s birth was and thinking “THIS IS NOTHING – YOU WENT THROUGH HELL THE FIRST TIME”! I knew (for the most part) that my birth plan would be followed, it wouldn’t deviate like last time. I KNEW what was happening soon. I didn’t have to worry about every single moment this time. It was amazing to me that I didn’t have to be terrified.

11:00 rolled around and the man who I almost named my first child after, came to give me my epidural. I’ll never forget that man from Harper’s birth. NEVER. I was anxious that I would be scared when he came in, and then I wasn’t!

Within 5 minutes of his arrival, he pushed some sort of magical juice through my IV and he had the epidural placed. It was time for John to come back into the room. I WAS JACKED UP. I imagine it’s what people who do heroine feel like. I didn’t want to talk to anyone because I wasn’t confident that my tongue would even cooperate. I shut my eyes and enjoyed the ride.

About 11:50 I was wheeled into the OR. This was the only part that I was scared. I was scared because I remembered how it felt to be moved from my stretcher to the operating table. It was still a scary ordeal because you feel like you’re about to hit the floor, and your dang legs don’t work! Luckily that was quickly over and I was heading back to narcotic land, shutting my eyes and waiting for John to come in. When I was in this position with Harper’s birth, I was shaking so violently that the doctor had to give me something to calm me down. It looked like I was seizing back then! Night and day, people.

John came in a few minutes after noon to sit with me and wait.

At 12:09 I could see my body shifting and moving from the pulling they were doing to get the baby out, and then we heard him cry for the very first time! Apparently he also peed on me as soon as he came out. A great indicator of what was to come.

There you go! Boring right? I’M SO GLAD IT WAS BORING.

Some people will tell you that C sections are an easy way out of labor. I had no way to tell if I could have him VBAC so soon after a previous C section. He never dropped down and for the most part, I had no cervical change. My body was indicating that I would not be able to deliver vaginially, just like the first time. I wasn’t willing to go through the trauma again. It was too much the first time. It’s something that will stick with me. Everyone told me it would go away and I would not even remember it, so not true! It was easy to do (to skip labor, that is), however It wasn’t an easy decision to make though, I knew what a C section recovery looked like, and it wasn’t pleasant.

Although the birth was an easy experience, the recovery was harder. I still have no idea why. The only explanations I can think of is that they had to reopen an old incision to get the baby, or they had to dig him out of me, making the whole process brutal. My stomach was crazy swollen until 2 weeks post partum. I still looked 7 months pregnant, and that was a hard thing to deal with! I just needed more time with this one. After 2.5 weeks, I am of course, not fully recovered, but a version of my old self is starting to emerge. I am slowly picking up more and more household duties and am able to hit the road in my car! Baby steps!

I’m hoping all of my formerly pregnant people out there had a good birth because almost all of you were due the same month I was!

XOXO

Bell

There’s a whole new set of assumptions I’ve walked into.  Some of it’s great.  Maybe people think moms are friendlier or they just like babies, but I get a ton more smiles when the little booger and I go for walks.  Or knowing nods from other moms, like “welcome to the club.” Some of it’s not so great.  Like the single guy at Whole Foods who looked at me like I’d personally offended him by daring to push my stroller into the produce section so that he had to walk around it…  I had my fair share of those moments too.  Don’t get me wrong.  I live in a very family friendly neighborhood and when the sidewalk turned into a maze of stroller obstacles and small children holding parents hands I got annoyed as I hurried through, exasperated that these people just didn’t have any mind for other people’s space. (I walk really slowly now.  It started because my pregnant body made me, now I’m just tired and don’t need to get anywhere fast. I only take up more than my fair share of the sidewalk, because I’m too tired and dazed to realize when someone else is there.)

Maybe I’m naive not to have expected this shift crossing over into parenthood. I’m not bothered by it. But this new projection of who I am is one more validation of how things have permanently changed.  Or maybe I’m just so limited on adult interaction during the day that I’m that much more sensitive. 

Her dresser is an antique, a gift from a friend, refinished by my husband in the high heat of an Ohio River valley July. Above it hangs a cross stitch from a friend I’ve known as long as I’ve been blogging, which reaches rather more deeply into my high school career than I’d like. On the opposite wall several art prints, an inked sketch from her one of her adoring aunties. A hand-painted elephant on her bookshelf from another. Crocheted blankets and quilts. Above her bed a card for her first Halloween, her name drawn with corresponding characters from Star Wars.

And these are just the things that I can see, the objects that lead me to consider all of the hugs, the kind words, the help we’ve received in her first few months in this world. The thing that’s best about it is, she’s got a family bigger than us. And it’s not just who’s in her blood. The people we’ve filled our life with love of love her, too.

I recently saw a post on Facebook that said, “I’ve seen the village, and I don’t want it raising my child.” To that I say, make your own village. Talk to your child’s teacher. A lot. Talk to your neighbors. The friend you haven’t made yet checking out an interesting book at the library. Will you regret it? I know I haven’t.

Sweet baby Captain telling me very clearly that I was being too loud.

When my husband and I discovered we were pregnant back in 2007, we were thrilled and appropriately nervous.  How could two people who had been living alone in a remote cabin in the forest, miles from town or other people, who had absolutely NO experience with kids, have a baby and raise it together in a healthy, happy and safe way? We had the most basic components: love, healthy relationships and excitement to welcome a new life into our family, but there were so many things to learn!  I would like to share one of the things that was very clear, easy to respond to, and helped us tremendously to listen to our baby, before she was able to use words, or other gestures, to tell us what was going on.  We called it the “stop hand”.

I spent a lot of my pregnancy in the mountains, without a lot of interaction with other people, while my husband was working during the days.  I was not alone however!  I was in the good company of 4 dogs, 2 cats, a load of chickens, and 2 beautiful geese named Ping and Vail.  The male goose, Ping, was my constant companion, as I sat in camp chairs outside reading.  He would honk at my big tummy and try to get my attention as I poured through birth and baby books.  Someone had given me a copy of Attachment Parenting: Instinctive Care for Your Baby and Young Child by Katie Allison Granju, Betsy Kennedy and William Sears, for which I will always be grateful.  The ideas presented really rang true for me, and just seemed like the right thing to do.  Co-sleeping, baby wearing, breastfeeding and elimination communication, among other things, were not hard practices to want to do.  Every parent makes different choices and these were just ones that struck an instant chord for us.  I plan to share our personal experience in elimination communication, and other natural parenting choices we made, at a different time.

Listening to our baby’s cues and doing our best in general helped us through a far from ideal birth experience, both mine and my husband’s postpartum depression, and endless sleepless nights.  What I want to focus on in this post is a specific cue that our daughter gave us as a baby, without words, to communicate that something was bothering her, before she started to fuss and cry.  It was the “stop hand”.  As you can see in the photo, Captain had her hand, palm out, open and nestled against her cheek. She was telling us “please stop”.  She would do this while awake, or asleep, to tell us if a noise was too loud, a movement or environment was making her uncomfortable, she didn’t want to be touched a certain way, or if she generally just wanted something to stop.  If we acknowledged this cue and stopped whatever it was that she didn’t like immediately, she was fine and would continue to sleep or go about her baby business.  If not, she would crinkle up like a piece of pink tissue paper and cry.

My husband and I started noticing the “stop hand” being used by other babies on our trips to town.  Once, we were picking up Grandma from the airport and saw a family with a tiny, brand new baby in a car seat carrier. The baby’s parents were hugging the grandparents, and we could see how hard it was for them all to say goodbye. The baby started to fuss in his sleep.  His mom suddenly reached for the straps and quickly lifted his still sleeping body from the carrier to hold him up to everyone for one last look. The stop hand immediately shot to his little cheek and stayed there for quite a while, as though trying to ward off the ooohs and ahhhs, before he crinkled up and wailed in misery.  I remember my husband whispering to me, “Oh look at the stop hand over there!”  We weren’t judging the parents at all as they were sadly saying goodby to loved ones, but we noticed how clear it was that the baby did not want to be touched while sleeping peacefully.

One other time that comes to mind was when I was in a Costco one day. Costco, with its bright lights and warehouse shopping vibe, probably isn’t very comfy for a babe anyways, but I saw a mom talking with a friend and all the while she was pushing the tiny baby back and forth rhythmically in the stroller to “soothe” him.  Each time she pushed and pulled the stroller, she would stop it with her foot and it would go bump, whooosh, bump , whoosh….  The women were admiring the baby, who had a stop hand pressed to his cheek like a little shield. He was sleeping, but starting to wake and really wasn’t ready yet.  I heard his mom say, “I wonder why he always puts his hand on his face like that?” and, 30 seconds later he was screaming.  Again, no judgement here, it is just something we noticed!

The “stop hand” baby cue seems to be fairly common and it helped us soooo much with Captain to recognize it!  It is a wonderful thing to respond to some of the things that babies are “saying”.  Reading their cues helps keep them happier and feeling secure. I would love to hear more about the cues we can experience with babies from any parents who care to share.  I am happy to say that Captain is 5 now and healthy, happy and doing great.  It is funny that still, on occasion, we see the stop hand pop out while she is sleeping.  It just happened the other night when she fell asleep in the car and I picked her up to carry her into the house.  Ohhhh little stop hand! It just fills my heart with the love and tenderness that I have felt toward her for all these years to see that little hand on her cheek!

I wish gentle love to all babies out there, and health and happiness to the children they become.

Good thoughts, Karen

We were home on April 1st (HAHA world), to begin our REAL journey on having both a new born AND a toddler! I was excited to get Harper back from family because I felt like when she saw me in the hospital, she didn’t want anything to do with me, so I missed her, I especially missed her favoritism towards me.

I really don’t even remember much about the first day home. I ate some french fries for lunch that I’m certain Jesus Christ himself made. John Tyler got to take his first nap in his very own nursery. Glad he liked it because he didn’t see much of that nursery for the first 2 weeks of his life!! I’m pretty sure this was the day I realized that Harper was mad at me. I’m not sure it was the whole “having a baby” thing, I think it was more that I had been absent for a week. She wasn’t cool with that. I was her favorite. Not anymore. I was probably hooked up to the milk factory machine that day and night every 2 hours when I wasn’t having him latch on. I really took advantage of latching at night when I was WAY too tired to pump and could just lay him at my side. He ate, I snoozed.

The entire first week home is a blurred mess in my brain. I’ll try to piece it together.

I would have DIED if John wasn’t home. I’m not sure how anyone in the world can take care of their toddler after having a c section. I couldn’t pick Harper up, couldn’t change her diaper, couldn’t chase after her, nothing! This didn’t help to pushing me further into the least favorite parent category for her. When I would take my medication, I was tired, but functioning. If I skipped it, I paid for it. I would have to have help drying my legs off after a shower, and putting pants and underwear on. The pain was that bad without the medicines. The recovery with Harper was NOT this bad. I was never so bruised feeling with her, I think they had to dig baby brother out of my ribs with a crowbar. That is the only explanation as to why I am STILL sore in my ribs.

The days were filled with asking John to bring me buckets of ice water to suck down, as well as any meals we required. There’s NO cooking the first week when you have 2 babies. I cried during the days, and John Tyler cried during the nights! We had understood shifts. We were lucky enough to have family help us out by taking Harper a few nights, because we REALLY needed that time in the morning to sleep in and recover from the night before. I forgot that when I only had one newborn to worry about, I could lay back down with her to nap or to sleep in, and I would get my sleep fix. You can’t do that with 2. And if you can, do tell me the trick.

That’s all I can extract from my brain about the first week.

Here we all are in our second week home. Harper is just now coming around. It may be because I am able to hang out more because the pain is going away, or it may just be running its course. John Tyler is bigger every time I look at him after falling asleep! He had surpassed his birth weight a few days after he was born (it usually takes 2 weeks for babies to do that), so I know he is going to be a healthy boy! Harper is getting her molars, prompting her to be mean to her mother and father. I wish those things would finish coming in! I want my sweet girl back!

I am finally cooking dinner for us, a task that proved entirely too much the first week. I am able to drive since I am no longer on pain medications. The real world is nice. I missed it. If you were to ask me how long John Tyler sleeps at night, I would have no answer for you. I’m too tired to notice times and actually remember them that late at night. I *think* he may have done a few 3-3.5 hour stints, but I can’t prove it. I’m sure I will have a more documented night next week when I am the only one getting up with him at night!

Here are some questions I’ve been asked recently:

How different are things with your second in regards to how you feel about him?

I am clinging to him more because I know he is our last baby, and I know how quickly everything slips away.

Although during the day, I feel like I hold him as much as I held Harper. At night, he is with me way more than she was. I’m very focused on preventing time from getting away from me, and even time snuggling in bed is valuable.

I feel a greater sense of accomplishment with breastfeeding him. He latches perfectly, and in turn, I am not in pain when I feed him. Even though I pump a lot, he still latches like a champ. I’m okay with this.

How is he different than Harper?

He pees and throws up on me/us WAAAAYYYYY more than she did. My, what a steady, strong stream.

He is much more laid back.

Noises and lights don’t bother him.

He doesn’t really care to be bounced like Harper did. He also doesn’t care much for pacifiers. He normally spits them back out and looks at me like “that was a fraud”!!

He doesn’t require a swaddle to sleep well.

How is he similar to Harper?

It’s hard to tell how similar he will be just yet. He does look EXACTLY like her newborn self! For real, they could be twins in the photos.

They also have the same big toe/first toe separation. However, his other toes are crazy long. Like chimpanzee stuff.

He was born with a nice little genetic mohawk. One difference in his hair and hers, is he has a sweet little “water tornado” swirl at the tip of his mohawk!

Benefits of having 2 so far:

• Being able to see him wear some of the gender neutral things that she wore.

(like this)

• Watching Harper come up to him and kiss him without us prompting her to do it. It’s especially refreshing when just the week prior, she would walk up to him and smack him as hard as she could. :/ He needs a helmet this first year. She will need a helmet next year.
• My baby wearing will soon be in full force. I like baby wearing.
• We finally have a sufficient number of pacifiers laying around.

I hope everyone was able to read that post and not think I’m a complete idiot. My brain is just mush. It’s hard to extract much from it just yet. I will try to leave a short birth story up soon, because really, it’s the thing to do as a blogger.

I miss everyone on here and am going to try to be more of a presence – my 100 daily readers are very important to me and I’m starting to miss the interaction!

XOXO

Bell

I’ve been trying to figure out who he looks most like. Here are some options:

My kids I love them very much,
But I still don’t think they know;
How much they mean, how much I care,
And the lengths to which I’d go.

Because they are my world. My hope?
That they treat life with respect;
And are good and caring and kind,
With manners they won’t forget.

Life’s not easy, but as a child,
They have freedom to do what they like:
Not constrained by adult pressures,
They could even – and do! – go on strike!

But Adulthood has obstacles,
And I want them to be prepared;
As we can’t always protect them,
Yet we don’t want them to be scared.

So we will give them tools for life,
To help them along their way;
We’ll share experiences, and our
Wisdom… until our dying day.

-Thursday, April 11th, 2013-

Ah, 29 weeks.. almost 30 in a couple days now. So crazy! To think just a couple short months we’ll have our little boy here with us. Makes me so happy. Although I have thoroughly enjoyed my pregnancy and have found much empowerment and confidence through this process, I am looking forward to life after birth. My body is constantly changing and adapting. It’s so amazing all the changes the body goes through in really a fairly short time.

My main worry right now is about these varicose veins. They have spread more, despite wearing the compression hose, maternity belt, resting more, & massages. I raked the back yard yesterday, which I thought would make them worse but actually seemed to help some. I’m still patiently awaiting the pool to open. It’s going to be my saving grace the last month or two. && a good way to get some cardio in. Walking is just too much right now. I end up in tears by the time I get back to the house.

Little Auguste is 17 inches in total now, weighing in at around 3 pounds. He’s responding more to music and is super fast at kicking back to our pushes. We have our alarm set to were the radio comes on instead of a buzzing noise, this morning when it came on the song “Born to be wild” just started, haha. Auguste started bouncing around like crazy. It was so funny. ^_^ He gets the hiccups pretty much every day now! So of course I pay attention to his kicks each day. He’s moves so much. My midwife said 6 in one hour is good. Well try like 40 in one hour. Healthy little boy, I’m so proud of him.

We’ve made our final list of items we need before he gets here. Not too much left, really just some extras that we would like to get.

We’ve also made some big changes in the home this week. We got rid of all the chemicals- cleaners, detergents, soaps, shampoos, conditioners, and replaced them with homemade TRULY organic ones. I can’t explain to you how much better the house feels from this, already! I can’t wait to see how it is in one month or two. The air just smells and feels different. More clean. Most of those items, unless you buy organic ones (even those can be questionable), contain toxic Volatile Organic Compounds, VOCs, that seep out of the bottles and around your home whenever you use them. These toxins build up in our bodies and can create a very wide array of health issues. I have noticed just in the past week, my itchy, sensitive skin has gone away!! It seems that my pregnancy has made me extra sensitive to normal soaps, shampoos, etc. This was just the change I needed. VOC’s are also found in paints, aerosol sprays, plastic shower curtains, air fresheners and disinfectants, most rugs, stored fuels and dry cleaned clothing, the list goes on. We’ve eliminated most of these and stored the paints, fuels, and others in the outdoor shed.

Another big one we’re changing is our mattress! I was shocked to find out all the crazy chemicals in regular mattresses!! We are sharing a room with Auguste so it is important to us that our mattress be safe for him too. We did after all spend a pretty penny on an all organic one for him. Phthalates, formaldehyde, mercury, lead, polyurethane foam, and PBDEs (flame retardants) just to name a few. The least toxic mattress we could find researching–a straw mattress! So that’s the plan, we have our california king size organic cotton futon cover being made & shipped to us right now. You find some nice, clean straw from a local feed store, lay it out on a tarp one sunny day to make sure it’s nice a dry. Then stuff your mattress cover! Our cover zips up so no bugs can get into it, but to ensure there isn’t, we’re throwing in 1/2 pound of dried lavender, a natural insect repellant. Every two or three months you change out your straw and wash the cover. We’re so excited to see what sleeping on a natural toxic free mattress does for us, and for Auguste.

http://www.softtiles.com/
This is what we are replacing our rugs with, they are just on top of the concrete slab right now. We’re doing a black, white, and grey combination to throw in some infant stimulation colors to the room.

I’m going to write another article soon with the recipes for all of our homemade cleaners, detergents, soaps, shampoos.

One step at a time we’re changing things. I just feel fortunate that we found out all these things before Auguste is here. It has been a humbling experience. We thought we were doing a lot of things right, but it turns out they were still super toxic. The goal is to cut all of these out eventually, one step at a time.

Bell-ay pictures….

I feel I should write you this letter to explain a few things from my point of view, not because they necessarily need explaining or that I owe you an explanation of any sort, but because I feel like getting it out of my system.

You know how I keep saying “I’m sorry I can’t make it because (insert something related to having a child)? Well, I’m writing you this to tell you I’m not, I’m not sorry at all.

I should just stop saying it.

I’m not sorry my life has changed because I have a son, I’m not sorry I can’t party like I think I’m 25. I’m not sorry I’m busy between 4.30 and 7.30 every single day. I’m not sorry I have to consider nap times or the constant wants and needs of a little one.  I’m not sorry I can’t stay out all night. I’m not sorry I can’t do whatever I want when I want. I’m not sorry that my concerns these days revolve around having a stack of teeny tiny clean pyjamas, teaching my son the difference between seeing something and hearing something, or reading books about sheep. I’m not sorry I have to deal with temper tantrums or dirty nappies. I’m not even sorry I haven’t had a full nights sleep in… I don’t know how long.

I’m not sorry. 

I’ve never been happier.

Old me with two (still) very good friends

While most of you have been wonderful and welcoming of this gorgeous new addition to our family, some of you, although very few, have perhaps had a more difficult time adjusting to the new me. Which is fair enough. I’m not writing this to say you have to love my son because I do or that you should in any way feel guilty. But if you think for a second that I am missing out on anything, or that my life, or that I personally somehow have less to offer now that I am a mother, you are sadly mistaken.

Sure, I don’t watch the news much anymore. I simply don’t have the time or energy for it, so I’ll fall off the wagon in any such conversation. I was never that into news and current affairs anyway, I’m more of the art and culture type. I don’t go out partying on weekends, hell, I don’t even make it down to the pub very often. And yes, I do spend a lot of time talking about my kid, or recent research into children’s sleep patterns or why I don’t let my son watch tv because these things are important to me. I understand that this may not always be of interest to you. And sometimes I complain that I’m tired  or that I haven’t had much sleep, or that I haven’t had any “me time” for ages. Saying things like “If you can’t handle the heat, get out of the kitchen” really doesn’t help, and tells me not only do you not understand, but you just don’t care. I’d never say that to you when you complain about your life and your job, and let’s be fair, you do complain, we all do. But ask me if I’d change a thing and the answer would be no. Because I’m not sorry.

new me, never happier

I know some people thought I was having a walk in the park when I was a full-time student being paid by the university to study, and some even continued to think so when I added full-time mother to that. “So what do you do all day?” Really? You have to ask? To the very few of you this applies I really have nothing but pity because you clearly don’t understand what either of those things entail. I’m always on call, I never clock off. When I’m not with my son I have to work on my degree. There is no such thing as a holiday or proper time off. (Actually, the last time I had a proper holiday was in 2009). But I’m not sorry about any of that either.

To those of you who have taken the time to come visit over the past 16 months despite me rarely if ever returning the favour, or just dropped an email to say hi, or accommodated the time and place of things so that we could come to whatever is happening, I love you even more for it. When you’ve gone with us to the zoo or offered to watch Anakin while I have a shower, when you’ve spent all night here alone on a Friday or Saturday so that we could go out and have dinner, it makes me want to squeeze you so tight and shout how much I love you. Because it’s people like you who are true friends. And let’s not forget when you gave me Dida-day. That still brings a tear to my eye and makes my heart burst in the very best way.

Right where I belong

So when you ask me to come to something and I say no because my son still breastfeeds and needs to be put to bed at a certain time, or because I’m simply too tired and life after 9 doesn’t really exist anymore, it’s unfortunate but I don’t feel it needs an apology. I occasionally wish I could accommodate both of you at the same time and in some cases I feel bad that I can’t, but I’m never sorry for what I have to do instead. I am right where I need to be.  What I can say I’m sorry about is if I’ve made you feel like you don’t matter as much as you used to, or that I don’t have any time for you. Because you do matter and I do have time, just not when or as much as I used to.

Much love and no apologies, Dida

“They” are not kidding when they say having a baby changes everything.

Instead of going out for dinner, I’m housing PB&J in front of the TV at 9pm, because that was my first opportunity to eat since getting home from work.

Instead of buying 4-inch high heels, I’m buying the latest in sippy cup technology.

Since I’ve had a good deal of time to ruminate on the drastic changes reproduction has had on my life, I compiled a short list of things that would never have been OK pre-baby, that I don’t even flinch at, post-baby:

1.  Finding poop in places other than a toilet is no longer a surprise or a traumatic experience.  There may or may not have been, at various points in the last 6 months, poop on my face, under my nails, on my fingers, in my hair, on my pants, and on my glasses.  Just to be clear… the poop did not come out of me.
2.  The time for being bothered by finding bodily fluids in my mouth is over.  My little bundle of joy has both drooled and spit up into my mouth, and I laughed when this happened.
3.  I am no longer above wearing pants to work that were spit-up on the previous night.  Did you know your body retains its pregnant size for many months after you stop being pregnant?  I didn’t.  The shock of being close to pre-pregnancy weight but being nowhere near my pre-pregnancy pants size is the primary culprit for me wearing whichever of my 2 pairs of almost-fitting pants are the LEAST covered in spit-up.
4.  I never would have thought I’d let at least 10 different people see my boobs, or that I wouldn’t give a crap about it, before I had a baby.  Then I had my son, and between nursing him and having to pump breast milk for him, the options were a) let people see my boobs, or b) don’t allow visitors in the house, ever.  After you spend 4 weeks allowing no one to come into the house besides your husband and your mother… you go with option A and you don’t look back.
5.  Babies like TV.  They like it so much that you will find yourself turning off your Alias DVDs because you’re not sure violence is something your newborn should be witnessing.  You will also find yourself turning on channels like Nick Junior and Disney Junior and Sprout.  Here’s the part I didn’t expect… you might prefer the shows you find on those channels over adult programming.
6.  You will forget how to talk to your husband about regular, adult topics.  Science?  Politics?  Current events?  These are infrequent topics in my house now.  We’ve been taken over by topics like sleep training, which vegetable the baby should try tomorrow, and how many ounces the baby drank today.  I didn’t think this would happen… but it did.

The biggest surprise of all?  Yes, all the above stuff has changed.  No, I did not expect any of that to happen to ME.  But I also wouldn’t change any of it back to the way it used to be, either.

Did I leave anything off my little list?  What became your new normal after you had your first child?

• The latest was a Jack Russell Terrier who jumped up and mauled the new infant as he slept in his bassinet.
• A one year old toddler was killed after he crawled onto his family dog Rhodesian mix (which apparently he had done previously).
• And a Lab/Golden mix that dismembered and disemboweled a baby left in a baby swing.
• And if that is not horrifying enough, in 2008 a 6 week old Lab puppy killed a baby left unattended in a baby swing.  6 week old puppy!

No one wins in these instances.  Dogs are euthanized.  Children have died or have been scarred for life and the parents are left to mourn in the aftermath.

Most of these instances have been family dog related attacks.

I hate writing these types of articles, but I feel obligated to help new parents, grandparents and dog owners alike know how to keep everyone as safe as possible when it comes to dogs.

These are my 5 most important tips when it comes to kids and dogs.

#5 Don’t Place Blame

It is easy for us dog owners or parents to sit back and place blame when we read a story like this, but blame keeps us from putting ourselves in the shoes of the parents or dog owners; and that is exactly what we need to do to keep this from happening again.

Dog owners and animal advocates will blame the parents or the children; this is easier for them than blaming the dog.  It had to be the parents fault or the child’s fault!  But who hasn’t lost track of their baby for a moment?

Parents will blame the animal.  It must have been aggressive or shown aggressive signs previously.

And everyone will be quite certain they would have been able to see the warning signs before the tragedy occurred.

Blame really does no one any good.

#4  Understand Dogs & Learn to “Read” Dogs

Dogs don’t always like children.  Some do, but some inherently don’t!

Children run like prey, they scream like prey and sometimes they are mistaken for prey.

Dogs are carnivores and they have instincts that would allow and encourage them to chase and kill their meals if need be.  Just because they are domesticated and they are our pets, does not mean that they do not still have these instincts.  Make no mistake instincts are genetic and not a problem of behavior, so even the most docile dog can be overrun by instinct.

Unfortunately when the dog bites the child and the child gutturally screams, it excites and incites the dog to more aggression.

Keep your dogs on leash when children are around!

If your dog stares at children or anything when it runs or rolls (bike, skateboard) past, you have reason to be concerned.   If it chases and nips, you also have reason to be concerned.  Even if you haven’t seen these behaviors you have cause to watch your dog.

I am assuming that a child in a baby swing activated the dog’s prey drive and the child became impossible for the dog to ignore.  Even a 6 week old puppy has prey drive.

Parents don’t want to think that their baby in a baby swing resembles a bunny to their 6 year old or 6 week old beloved family dog, but unfortunately he can.

Even dogs that can control their prey drives, still don’t understand that young children and toddlers are small humans.  Frequently dogs treat these small children like they are other dogs.  This places them (the children) lower on the totem pole or hierarchy.  So when a toddler climbs up on the dog’s back and the dog gives subtle warning signs (like stiffening and staring; that other dogs would recognize but as people we find more difficult to see).  The dog feels like it is left to “correct” or bite the child; often in the head or face (where dogs bite other dogs).

Countless dogs have difficulty sharing.  They may go from being the only “child” in the house to now sharing their owners’ time and affection, or feel like they rarely seeing their owner at all anymore.

And new parents rarely take time to ensure that the family dog doesn’t get jealous.  So the jealousy can build and build and when given the opportunity the dog can take this pent out aggression out on the child.

#3 Teach Your Children

Although babies cannot be educated about dog behavior (they must be watched and monitored), toddlers, young children and children can.

It is crucial that children are taught never to lie on top of a dog.

Never to hug a dog (dogs don’t hug each other in the wild; this is a very dominant behavior).

Never to run up to or away from a dog; frequently children are bitten when (after they have petted the dog) they turn to run away.  Running makes children look like prey and you never want you child to be misconstrued as a prey animal by a dog.

If a dog runs at your child, teach him/her to “be a tree” being completely silent and putting their hands and arms flush against their body and wait for the dog to lose interest.

Never allow children to stick their hands, or face in a dog’s face and never to put their hand over the top of a dog’s head.  Getting in a dog’s face is very dominant behavior.  If another dog did this to your dog he would be met with a growl and a snap.  And quick moving hands can be threatening to a dog.

Instead teach your children to put out their hand to be sniffed and then to pet dogs on their chest.

Teach your children never to pet a dog without you there.  Children cannot read intricate dog body language and so they frequently incur bites by dogs who think they have given many warnings.

Never scream around a dog.  Screaming can scare a dog and incite aggression in a fraction of a second!

Children should be taught to be quiet and well-mannered around dogs, even their own.

Never take your child to a dog park.  Dogs that run in packs are even more terrifying than those alone and dogs at dog parks can perceive running, screaming children as prey.

Never enter the property of someone else even if the child has met the dog.  Countless children are bitten when they wander into the backyard of a neighbor dog looking for their ball or something else.

Children should never go onto a neighbor’s property without adult supervision.

ALWAYS keep an eye on your child.  If you see a dog staring at your child, calmly and quietly leave the area.

Staring and stiffening are often the first signs of stalking and attack!
The “Wrong Dog” Could Maul a Child! Children Should be Taught Never Hug or Lay on Top of Dogs!

#2 Monitor Dog and Child Interaction

Always, always, always monitor the interaction of your children and dogs, even your own pet dog.

You may think your dog would never bite your child, but in the right circumstances all dogs will bite.

Children often think that we adults don’t know what we are talking about, so when they are alone they might be rougher with your dog or they might not be paying attention.  If a child trips and falls on a dog even a nonaggressive and child friendly dog; the dog is likely to bite.

Be very careful when other children come to play.  When children wrestle and fight playfully with one another a dog can misconstrue that as the friend attacking his pack member and a serious bite could ensue.

I teach my dogs to stay with me.  If I can’t see them I go and get them.  I don’t want there to even be a second that a child might do something painful or that the dog thinks is rude or bad manners and get bitten.

If I can’t watch my dogs, they go in crates.

And, if I can’t trust the children (that they might let my dogs out of their crates), they (the children) come with me.

#1 Never leave a Child Alone

Many of the aforementioned stories resulted because the children were left alone and yet the dog still had access to the child.

Keeping an eye on your children and monitoring them with dogs is important, but some parents don’t realize that a dog should never even have access to the child.

In the case of the bassinet attack, I am guessing that the parents would never have expected the dog to jump up and into the bassinet to attack the baby.

There was also a similar case where the dog took the baby out of the crib when the parents stepped outside.

Never leave your baby alone where the dog could access him or her.

Attacks and incidents can happen in the fraction of a second.

Shut the baby’s room door and make sure it is secure and, if needs be, put your dog in a crate.

Leaving your baby alone in a baby swing is just asking for trouble.  In both cases one parent was home and asleep in another part of the house.

Make sure your biggest asset (your child) is safe!

These stories are terrifying and I hate talking about it too, but as parents and dog owners we need to take responsibility for those in our care.

Don’t automatically place blame.

As horrifying as it is put yourselves in the shoes of those involved and come up with a plan so that we can learn from these tragedies and ensure that they never happen again!

Education, understanding and control are what keep our children and our dogs safe!  Please share this article with those you love.

Let Her Eat Dirt

No, not as a meal and not by the bucket load. The point here is that it’s better for your child to get messy, get dirty, and come in contact with the natural world than it is for them to grow up in an ultrasterile environment where you scrub every surface with disinfectant. The reason: you need to allow their immune armies to get their basic training. If they don’t have an opportunity to practice fighting, then they’ll be trigger-happy when they encounter a minor intruder. So while we certainly recommend that you be vigilant when it comes to hand washing to protect against those viruses and bacteria that can get passed from kid to kid and from hand to mouth, remember that there’s an absolute biological advantage to exposing your kid to all kinds of things in the natural world, including dirt. Note the difference between dirt (organic, such as what’s found on a farm) and filth (city grime).

Reduce Exposure

You can’t cure allergies or asthma, but you can minimize the damage by trying to reduce your child’s exposure to triggers. Some tactics you can take:

• Keep the floor in your child’s room uncarpeted, because bare floors don’t trap allergens as much as rugs and carpets. Even better, do the same for the whole house.
• Use light drapes that you can wash regularly instead of heavy ones, which can trap dust. Even better, install blinds and wipe them down frequently.
• Use special one-micron or latex covers for all pillows and mattresses to keep dust mites from sneaking onto your child. Commonly sold as “hypoallergenic dust mite protectors,” they should zip close, not just wrap or stretch around like a fitted sheet.
• After your child plays outside, change her clothes, because they may have picked up pollen. Have her take a shower or bath at the end of a good day of play outside to minimize exposure to poison ivy and other contact allergens.
• If your child is waking up with allergic symptoms, it could be the stuff inside her pillow, either the feathers or the mite poop. Switch from feather to foam and seal with a one-micron pillowcase to see if her symptoms improve.

Get Your Pets First

In an ideal world, you’ll want to have the pets before the kids. Why? That way, your newborn will be exposed to the animal’s allergens from the get-go, so her immune system will learn how to handle them and thus reduce risk of allergy. If you have a family history of pet allergies, you may have to choose not to have any furry pets at all (fish are nice), or do some research on dogs to find some of the less allergenic breeds, such as poodles and labradoodles.

Watch the Eggs

We recommend that you avoid giving egg whites to children until they’re at least 1 year old, because exposure to the whites may induce an allergy. A hard-boiled egg yolk is OK after 6 months of age. By the way, kids typically outgrow egg allergies by age 2.

Be Assertive

If your child has a severe peanut allergy or other serious allergy, you will have to be her strongest advocate everywhere she goes — clearly communicating in writing the seriousness of the allergy and how to handle it, including prevention, an action plan in case of exposure, and emergency numbers. Many other parents will try to help, some will be aloof, and some will underestimate the severity of the problem, so make no assumptions about what other people know and don’t know about allergies. Be clear about the risks and about the parameters: for example, that your child will get reactions even if the peanuts are anywhere in the room. As your child gets older, she’ll learn what she can and can’t have, but at this stage, it takes hyper-vigilance on your part to educate everyone else around her.

It’s important to clear up some of the most common rookie mistakes that adults make: like making a sandwich with the same knife that was used to spread peanut butter, or sharing foods that don’t overtly contain any peanuts but may have been made with peanut oil. We recommend that you check with the manufacturers of all foods your child eats to make sure that their production lines are nut-free. Interesting note: a lot of locally made products are manufactured at small facilities where different food companies rent time, so you don’t know whether another food company may have contaminated the equipment. Often, the large national brands are the most reliable.

Let’s Talk Milk

Since many kids are allergic to the protein in cow’s milk, you need to watch out for symptoms that may indicate such an allergy in babies. The symptoms may include bloody or mucousy stools, irritability, and the baby drawing her knees up to her abdomen from cramping. If that’s the case and you are feeding with formula, you can switch to a nonallergenic brand, and the symptoms will usually resolve within a few days. If you’re breastfeeding, you may need to experiment with your own diet. Eliminating milk protein from your diet often will do the trick. Children often outgrow milk allergies by age 2, so ask your doctor about reintroducing milk in small amounts periodically to see if your child can tolerate it down the line.

Help Your Child Breath Easier

If your child suffers from asthma, prevention is half the battle. Some actions you should take:

• No smoking and get rid of all allergy triggers.
• Keep pets out of your child’s bedroom — or even better, out of the house.
• Stay calm. When your child is having trouble during an asthma attack, it’s easy to panic. But your losing control only exacerbates your child’s stress response, further constricting his airways. Having a clear plan for how to respond will help ease some of your anxiety.
• See the animals. If you live near a zoo, take your child there before she turns 6 months old. While she won’t remember the poop-playing monkeys or the sleep-all-day lions, her immune system will. The zoo is filled with a particular type of antigen called endotoxin, which will actually help your child build up her immunity army. Similarly, if you can visit a working farm before your child is 6 months, you’ll reap the same benefits.

Get up and go. Children who hang out in front of the TV for two hours a day seem to double their risk of developing asthma. The theory is that TV watching takes the place of physical activity. While the relationships between the behaviors and asthma aren’t fully known, researchers believe there’s a link between lack of physical activity and a change in the structure and function of the lungs. Go swimming: it seems like swimming does an excellent job of lessening asthma symptoms in children, although some kids do have reactions to the chlorine.

Source: Popsugar Moms

I interrupt the Guilty Jean jewelry series for a very special announcement!!!  The hubby and I went to the doctor on Friday for our anatomy ultrasound for Little Monkey.  We opted not to find out the sex of the baby that day.  However, we decided to plan a little surprise reveal for ourselves.  We had the nurse write down the sex and place it in a sealed envelope along with the ultrasound photograph of “the goods.”  We then took the envelope along with a large empty box to Hallmark and asked them to fill the box with either pink or blue balloons depending on whether Little Monkey was a girl or boy.  Yes…the Hallmark employees knew before we did!  They wrapped the box up beautifully, and when we opened it…SURPRISE!!!  Our friend, Justin, was gracious enough to spend the day with us and document this special moment.  We are so thankful for the many photographs he took and time he spent working on them.  I think they turned out fantastic.  Scroll down to see the big reveal for yourselves!

Boy…or Girl???

It’s a BOY!!!

Opening the card with ultrasound from the doc

Proof of “the goods”

So excited for our Baby Boy!

So in love and so excited for the newest addition of the Notes Family to arrive!

Photography by Justin Goldberg of Eudora Video Solutions

Were you surprised?  Or did you “know” already?

As you can see by the photos above, Zack and I were clearly shocked!  It was such a magical day, and I’m glad we decided to do something fun and a little different to reveal the sex of Little Monkey.  We are so excited for our little bundle of joy, and cannot wait for our Baby Boy to get here in September.  I already ended up buying him his first onesie today at Brooklyn Flea.  I mean, come on.  There was a panda on it.  You can’t blame me.

We had such an amazing weekend, and it is definitely one we will remember.  We are so glad we have these photos to capture our surprise and excitement of this day, and I look forward to showing them to our Little Boy one day.

Hope you all had a fantastic weekend!

XO,

Gina

I’ve been going through a private blog that I recorded after the birth of Plum and decided to slowly migrate it over to my current blog so that everything is in one place.  Being that we just came out of our weekend, I’d like to share this piece entitled “Weekend-Getaway Gone-Awry.” with you.  It reminded me of how “green”  and unprepared us newbie parents were way back when Plum was only 5 months old.

Enjoy!