• This week as a voter in North Carolina, I was presented with a decision about whether to vote for or against the marriage amendment in North Carolina. I weighed both sides of the topic before I made a decision on how to vote.
  • On the one hand it is already illegal to have homosexual marriage in NC, so why have an amendment about it?
  • On the other hand, since marriage is between one man and one woman, why not have a double guarantee that it will remain that way? That is the way I ended up voting (YES for the amendment).
  • The marriage amendment passed decisively in NC. I personally found the timing of the President’s announcement to be politically suspect, in light of the NC decision. I suspect that he was sending a signal to those in favor of homosexual marriage, that I am your candidate, you can vote for me. I also believe he was trying to energize one wing of his liberal base, as a candidate looking for potential votes, and raising funds for his campaign. He is a slick political operative.

• Grieved I am over the President’s words this afternoon.
  • He is personally comfortable with homosexual marriages, in so many words. For the record I am not in favor of homosexual marriages. As a matter of fact I am opposed to them, on a Biblical, moral, and social basis.
    • To me the subject of gay marriage and how one stands on it have now become a litmus test in our society that show someone’s reasonableness and open mindedness.
    • Unfortunately one’s stand on gay marriage is the new litmus test for orthodoxy in the politically correct climate of our country. The litmus test used to be how one stood on abortion. Now it seems to have shifted to the gay issue.
• Homosexuals will continue to live together and be sexually active whether or not homosexual marriage is legal or not. To me one of the benefits to them of a homosexual marriage is to be a legal beneficiary (like a spouse) of health insurance, pensions and one another’s inherited wealth.
• As an American, I believe that all Americans should have the freedom to worship as they please, make choices for their lives as they please and have ‘life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness’.
• As an American I also believe that values should guide our society. To me there is a right and wrong. To many Americans there is ‘what’s right for you and what’s right for me and they may differ’. Don’t tread on me and I won’t tread on you.
• Just because I am opposed to gay marriage does not mean that I am against gays. God loves them, and so do I. They need to know Jesus and receive His forgiveness just like everyone else does. I can show God’s love to homosexual people without having to condone homosexual marriage.
• Marriage was God’s idea. He dreamed it up, He created it. When God spoke of marriage, He spoke in terms of male and female.
  • See Genesis 2:24: ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh’.
  • Plus Jesus reiterated this when he made these comments recorded in Matthew 19: 4 – 6: ‘And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, ⁵ and said, ‘ For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? ⁶ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate’.
• What the Bible says about marriage does not just apply to how Christians or Jews happen to interpret marriage. What the Bible says about marriage applies to everyone. Homosexuals are not ‘off the hook’ in relation to Biblical truth just because they may not be Christians. The Bible is not just ‘truth for and applicable to Christians’. Rather it is ‘truth for and applicable to everyone’.
• Let us call that the clash between Absolute Truth and Relative Truth.
  • Absolute truth says there are moral absolutes that apply to all of us. There is a right and wrong. Plus we take our cues about what is right and wrong based on God’s Word, the Bible.
  • Relative truth says there are no moral absolutes. What is right for me is ok for me and what is right for you is right for you. Don’t tread on me and I won’t tread on you. We can respectfully disagree and live by our own standards, and it’s okay.
  • My basis for truth is not how I ‘feel about things’, nor is it the current cultural climate.

• Stay tuned for other installments on related topics…
• What does the Bible say about homosexuality and other sins?
  • 1 Corinthians 6: 9 – 11
  • What attitude are we as Christians to have towards homosexuals and towards those who practice the other types of behaviors listed in this passage?
  • Is homosexuality any worse than any of these other sins?
• What was the grossly immoral sin of the city of Sodom in the Old Testament?
• What does the Bible say about confession and repentance from sin?

Josh Barro notes that marriage cannot be an entirely state issue because of the way in which it impacts things like Social Security and Medicare eligibility. Below is the majority of a post I wrote in September, 2011 on the subsidy of marriage provided by Social Security…..

Gene Steurle and Stephanie Rennane have a nice policy brief put out by the National Institute for Health Care Management on the lifetime contributions and benefits of Social Security and Medicare. This is mostly familiar stuff, with lifetime Medicare benefits consistently being several times larger than contributions to the pay-as-you-go program, and Social Security lifetime contributions and benefits being more similar for singles and two-earner couples. However, one thing jumped out from this figure (circled):

The profound subsidy of marriage that is inherent in how Social Security determines benefits for spouses who do not pay Social Security taxes in earlier life. As Steurle notes:

While a single woman who worked a full career at the average wage can expect to receive Social Security benefits roughly in line with her payroll contributions, a married woman who never worked but whose husband paid the same taxes as the single woman can expect to receive about $180,000 in spousal and survivor benefits. Unlike private pensions, these additional benefits are essentially free but only to those who are married, regardless of need, contributions or any child rearing.

The subsidy would be the same if the gender roles were switched.

Determining what type of contracts (marriage, civil union, etc.) provide the benefit described here–allowing one member of a couple to obtain eligibility for Medicare and a Social Security pension even if they have no market wages that were subject to payroll taxes over their younger years– and whether all American citizens have access to this subsidy, is a key public policy detail that will have to be worked out if marriage equality is to have its fullest meaning.

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry that as a straight, married woman I am part of a majority that has said, “My love is sacred and celebrated,” and has ignored or insulted yours.

I’m sorry that as a Christian, my views are often reported as stating that, “I know what God wants, and He agrees with me.”

I’m sorry that as a foreigner, an immigrant to this country, I was able to walk in with my marriage certificate half written in Welsh and demand that it be taken seriously; whereas your marriage certificate from one of these other states to which we are united does not guarantee any recognition of your union.

I’m sorry. It doesn’t seem fair.

I do not repent of marrying my husband. No regrets there. But I do repent of taking for granted the right to marry him. I’m sorry.

I’m sorry that I didn’t pray longer or louder for you.

There are those who do, though. Let me offer a little light on a dark day. We have our own amendment in Ohio, but there are children who do not believe in it. There are children in our schools who insist that when the family relationships class plans mock weddings, they should include the weddings hoped for by all of the students, not just the majority. They plan to marry, regardless of the law. They do not believe that, in the future, that law will stand; that it will be allowed to stand in their way. They believe that in their future, love wins.

If I said, I believe that your love is sacred, is to be celebrated; that loving, faithful, committed marriages are something we should be supporting, not denying; that they are, yes, the bedrock of our families – and we should make sure that all of our families have our support and our celebration; if I said that I know that you are beloved not only of one another but of God, I might sound, from where I stand, a little bit patronizing. Especially today.

So I’ll just say, I’m sorry.

love,

Rosalind

I’m not going to sit here and tell you which way to vote, or even my opinions on it, although it did take a long time for me to decide to try and post this even-handedly. If you want my opinion, tweet at me. Regardless, if you’re over 18 and a citizen of the State of North Carolina. Go Vote!

*If you don’t know where to vote or who’s on your ballot, you no longer have an excuse if you click here.

Let us pray that our state gets it right.