the muddy groanings of travelling interlocutors lodged in some lions molars

watch them dance back and forth – o rather dangle in the housings of their fleshly overlords

racing hearts – growing weak and overcome with dread

warning: tread not hither brother as your visit shall prove cruel in the best way

Este pavo es el puto overlord de MW2, joder como mata.

Por Girls of War

Desde o início da produção de jogos, os games sempre estiveram em um universo masculinizado, totalmente cinza-Metal Gear, às vezes com um toque de alguma mulher, mas que infelizmente não tinham tanto reconhecimento. Com o passar dos anos, e principalmente nos dias atuais, as mulheres dominam mais a produção de games e se destacam cada vez mais com trabalhos notáveis.

Mulheres, sejam ocidentais ou orientais, estão por trás de grandes produções de games. E não são joguinhos fofinhos e meigos, como muitos preconceituosos pensam, e sim, jogos como Assassin’s Creed, Phoenix Wright, Altered Beast, Mirror’s Edge e muitos outros.

Para provar a força da feminilidade nos games, a revista inglesa Edge publicou, no ano de 2006, uma lista com as 100 mulheres mais influentes na indústria dos games. São figuras que vão desde escritoras de histórias e designers até produtoras. Separamos algumas que estão presentes na listagem, e outras que ficaram conhecidas nos anos seguintes.

Conheça um pouco das mulheres que trabalham nos bastidores das empresas de games:

Rieko Kodama – Saúdem a Primeira Dama do RPG!

Esta grande designer é conhecida no mundo gamer como a “Primeira dama do RPG”. A japonesa, nascida no dia 23 de maio de 1963 e natural da cidade de Kanagawa, já atuou na produção de games do “alto escalão” da Sega, como: Phantasy Star, Sonic e Alex Kidd. Mas é claro que ela não parou por aí! Rieko também é famosa por muitos outros jogos como Shinobi, Altered Beast, SpellCaster, Ninja Pincess, Deep Fear e muitos outros. A designer já atuou como diretora no game Magic Knight Rayearth, para o falecido Sega Saturn. Um fato interessante na vida dessa designer de games foi ela ter começado a carreira com a arte e a arqueologia.

E, para provar que todo conhecimento adquirido é válido, muito sabiamente a japinha poderosa tratou de adaptar seus estudos – bem ao estilo Tomb Raider de ser – ao seu trabalho com games, quando, em 1984, um amigo a convidou para trabalhar na Sega (amigo bom!!!). As influências arqueológicas de Reiko podem ser percebidas em games como Phantasy Star e Skies Of Arcadia, por exemplo. Neles, os jogadores quase sempre têm que viajar e descobrir civilizações antigas.

Já trabalhando diretamente com games, Kodama começou como designer de personagens em títulos como Champion Boxing (1984) e Ninja Princess (1984). Ela também arrasou no saudoso Master System com jogos como: Alex Kidd in Miracle World (1986) e Quartet (1987). Como ela teve a sorte de ser uma das poucas designers da companhia, naquela época, ela passou a trabalhar em vários títulos ao mesmo tempo, o que a fez ficar conhecida e ter seu trabalho respeitado muito rápido. No entanto, o grande “boom” na carreira de Reiko aconteceu quando a artista teve a oportunidade de trabalhar em grandes projetos, como Phantasy Star, que foi lançado para concorrer com o também famoso Dragon Quest. Como a designer principal do games, Kodama foi a responsável pela criação do desenho de todos os personagens, dos mapas em 2D, das cenas de guerra em background, das pessoas da cidade, dentre outras coisas.

Agora vocês devem estar se perguntando. O que essa japinha genial está fazendo agora? Bom, rumores dizem que Reiko Overpower Kodama estaria desenvolvendo um RPG, 7th Dragon – para Nintendo DS, em parceria com Kazuya Niinou (Trauma Center, Etrian Odyssey) e o lendário compositor Yuzo Koshiro. 7th Dragon foi lançado em março de 2009. O boato se confirmou!

Jade Raymond – A caloura mais bonita dos games

No meio de um grande império de produtores orientais e ocidentais e suas obras-primas nos games, eis que começam a surgir os primeiros vestígios femininos, mesmo que eles não sejam notados em suas obras em si.

Assassin’s Creed não deixa nem um pouco à mostra que a novata – mesmo com 10 anos de carreira e um curto currículo, mas já invejável – Jade Raymond, uma mulher determinada e com uma personalidade cativante, está por trás desse novo game que foi lançado para PS3 e X360.

Jade Raymond, nascida em 28/08/1975 no Canadá, começou no mundo dos games aos seis anos de idade quando jogou Pong pela primeira vez no computador de seu primo. A partir daí seu gosto por games só foi crescendo, especialmente com a ajuda de tio que comprava games para a pequena Jade e a enfrentava, tentando fazer com que ela o derrotasse nos jogos.

Após longos anos, uma das novas “musas gamers” tornou-se bacharel em Ciência da Computação e seu primeiro emprego na área foi na IBM como programadora de jogos educacionais, e logo depois foi consultora no Grupo de Pesquisas Avançadas da Microsoft.

Seu primeiro trabalho na indústria dos games foi na Sony, cujos jogos Jeopardy! e Trivial Pursuit tiveram Jade na equipe de programação. Nesse período, ela começou a produzir um game do filme As Panteras (Charlie’s Angels), mas não deslanchou. Após esse período na Sony, Jade foi para a EA Games e tornou-se produtora, desenvolvendo aplicativos de recursos online e acabou produzindo The Sims Online. Um ano depois foi para There Inc e foi Produtora/Arte do game “There”, um mundo virtual em 3D, concorrente do famoso Simple Life.

Quatro anos depois de trabalhar na There Inc, Jade Raymond aparece nos créditos de Assassin’s Creed – um de seus trabalhos mais reconhecidos pelo enredo, gráficos e jogabilidade, e lançado para dois consoles de última geração – ganhando um reconhecimento merecido e a surpresa dos gamers por se tratar de uma mulher produzindo um game de tamanha grandiosidade. Dizem que Jade é responsável pela roupa de Altair presente em Metal Gear Solid 4.

Claro que, mesmo com a falta de tempo, ela não deixou de ser gamer. Resident Evil 4 é o seu game preferido e no lançamento de Everquest ela passou 10 horas por dia durante 3 meses só jogando esse game. Ela também adora games que têm macacos, tanto que seu personagem favorito é o Donkey Kong. Além de produtora de games, Jade também é co-apresentadora do programa The Eletric Playground, do canal G4.

Minae Matsukawa – A feminilidade da Capcom

No Japão é raro ver uma mulher trabalhando em desenvolvedoras de games, especialmente na produção de um game, e pode-se dizer que Matsukawa é uma das japonesas mais bem sucedidas na área. Ela é responsável pela série Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney para Nintendo DS.

Essa japonesinha tímida é a única mulher desenvolvedora presente na Capcom. As outras são artistas e designers. Antes de entrar para o time da Capcom, Minae Matsukawa trabalhou em uma empresa de segurança. Logo depois esteve nos escritórios da Nintendo, onde conheceu Shigeru Miyamoto, e tempos depois trabalhou na IT, em departamentos de distribuição de jogos online até que em 2001, foi para a Capcom.

Miane está presente na Capcom há seis anos, onde começou com Breath of Fire V. Logo em seguida ela produziu a série Magical Quest da Disney, Disney Aladdin, Capcom Classics Collection, Mega Man X, participou nos Street Fighter, e por fim, em The Darkstalkers para PSP e a série Phoenix Wright, onde ficou conhecida.  Na verdade, Minae sempre foi uma assistente de produção. Ela só se realizou como produtora com esses dois últimos jogos citados.

Rhianna Pratchett – A autora de Mirror’s Edge

Nascida em 1976, na Inglaterra, Rhianna Pratchett é uma escritora de roteiros de jogos, designer e jornalista. O pai dela, Terry Prachett é um dos maiores autores de histórias de fantasia e ficção infantil. Rhianna se especializou em desenvolver histórias, humor e caracterização dos games.

Pratchett é bastante conhecida por ser escritora da história de Heavenly Sword, Overlord e Dungeon Hero. Mas agora ela é responsável pelo enredo do jogo Mirror’s Edge. Rhianna buscou semelhanças em um seriado da TV, o Prison Break. Em ambos os casos, tanto o jogo quanto o seriado, o objetivo principal é resgatar o irmão/irmã, através de qualquer meio necessário. A história que gira em torno da cidade também tem bastantes similaridades, onde os governantes querem o melhor para a população, conquistando-a, também, custe o que custar.

E o que a inglesa está fazendo atualmente? A Electronic Arts fechou parceria com a DC Comics, responsável pelas histórias do Batman e Super Homem. Por esta razão, Rhianna Pratchett está ultimamente se dedicando aos quadrinhos sobre Mirror’s Edge. A coleção de HQ será composta por seis edições que prometem contar detalhes da história da protagonista Faith.

É o que sempre falamos: Por trás de um grande game, sempre existe uma grande mulher!

Steam have two nice weekend deals on offer – 50% off the Crysis series, and 75% off the Overlord series. Other noteworthy deals include 50% off Demigod over at Impulse, and 75% off a big ol’ bundle of indie games (including Aquaria) at Direct2Drive.

Play-Asia:
Tatsunoko vs. Capcom: Cross Generation of Heroes (Wii) – $24.90 ($44 off) (Japanese systems only)

Steam Weekend Deals:
Crysis Maximum Edition – $29.98 (50% off)
Includes:
Crysis - $14.99 (50% off)
Crysis Warhead - $14.99 (50% off)
Overlord Complete Pack - $8.75 (75% off)
Includes:
Overlord - $1.50 (75% off)
Overlord: Raising Hell - $2.50 (75% off)
Overlord II - $7.50 (75% off)

Other Steam Deals:
Dreamkiller - $19.99 (33% off)
Quantz - $4.99 (50% off)
All Aspect War Pack - $29.99 (50% off)
Includes:
All Aspect Warfare - $19.99 (50% off)
Angle of Attack - $12.49 (50% off)

Impulse:
Children of the Nile - $12.99 (35% off)
Demigod - $14.99 (50% off)
DeskScapes 3 (application) – $14.95 (25% off)
Hacker Evolution - $12.50 (50% off)
Titan Quest - $12.56 (25% off)
Tropico Reloaded - $10.76 (50% off)

GOG Promo:
Elixir Studio games up to 50% off:
(30% off if you buy one, 50% off for both)
Evil Genius - $6.99 (30% off)
Republic: The Revolution - $6.99 (30% off)
Evil Genius AND Republic: The Revolution – $9.98 (50% off)

Direct2Drive:
Best of Indie Bundle Vol. 2 - $24.95 (75% off)
Includes Aaaaa!, Acceleration of Suguri, And Yet It Moves, Aquaria, Crayon Physics Deluxe, I-Fluid, and Project Aftermath.
Joint Operations Combined Arms - $5.00 (83% off)

GamersGate:
Company of Heroes Complete Pack - $29.95 (50% off)
Darkstar One - $4.95 (50% off)
Supreme Ruler 2020 Gold - $14.95 (50% off)
S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Clear Sky - $14.95 (50% off)

Now, as a gamer I understand that we can’t buy all of the games we want. Everyone has the games that they will undoubtly get but there are others that they simply can’t afford or don’t have the time for. So I thought I would start up a new Bargains category to hopefully help this matter just a little bit. Every time I find a cheap game, accessory or anything related to gaming I’ll post it here and share it with everyone.

To start off this category we have Overlord II for a tenner. I haven’t played the game but I’ve been told that it’s a good, fun game and it sounds like it’s worth the money you’ll be paying. The deal is for PS3 and X360.

PS3 – £10.00

X360 – £10.00

There has been a take over at Gryphon’s Aerie. Don’t worry about your blog being taken over though. It appears that Gryph trusted the Doc and gave him administrative access to his site. Part of me feels sorry for Gryph but he should have known better than to give that kind of access to a crazy overlord!

The students at the University of Oklahoma have put together a robot that will surely join the other drones in our future robot overlord regime. This autonomous vehicle was produced to replace human security patrols which can be both boring and dangerous. Intent on delivering surveillance to most locations, an all terrain vehicle was used as the base. It can navigate by itself through an obstacle avoidance system and communicate video and audio wirelessly. After the break we’ll take a look at the systems that make this work.

The team implemented steering controls by mounting a geared motor to the front of the ATV. This steering motor interfaces with a gear they added to the steering column via a chain. Obstacle avoidance is facilitated by sonar sensors on the front and sides of the chassis. These sensors can detect ground level obstacles such as curbs.

The vehicle uses both pre-programmed as well as sensor-based behavior. To start, the patrol route is fed into the program. Once unleashed, the bot uses a combination of this data, as well as input from a GPS module, digital compass, and the range finders to complete its mission. All of these components are tied together by the onboard Toughbook in conjunction with a 16-bit microcontroller. A wireless router provides connectivity for transferring data as well as remote joystick based control if needed.

Project developers [Fares Beainy] and [Sesh Commuri] sent us their paper detailing the project (PDF). The readily available, inexpensive hardware used to complete this bot says a lot about how far we have come with technology. It shouldn’t be too much longer before this type of hardware shows up in your town sweeping the streets for criminal scum (or humans recently escaped from the processing facility).

I know, I haven’t written anything in a while, this is because I got a new job and wasn’t in the mood to write anything after work. Now I have accustomed to work and will start writing again.

My next projects will be Overlord and Overlord 2, Dead Space and Final Fantasy VIII.

I don’t know when exactly I will do them, but it will be within the next month. Please be patient.

System Requirements:

Overlord 2: Recommended system requirements
OS: Windows XP SP2 / Vista SP1
CPU: Intel Core 2 Duo or Athlon 64 X2
RAM: 2 GiByte
Graphics card: Geforce 7900 GTX or Radeon HD 2600 XT
HDD: 1.5 GiByte
Creative X-Fi

Download URL:

http://hotfile.com/dl/7541277/aa10af6/OL2.rld.DotNXT.part01.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/7541311/5f8d6f9/OL2.rld.DotNXT.part02.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/7541347/dbae95e/OL2.rld.DotNXT.part03.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/7541374/669e449/OL2.rld.DotNXT.part04.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/7541392/95e4a6f/OL2.rld.DotNXT.part05.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/7541418/d178307/OL2.rld.DotNXT.part06.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/7541443/40caf10/OL2.rld.DotNXT.part07.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/7541470/950634d/OL2.rld.DotNXT.part08.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/7541486/4c346fb/OL2.rld.DotNXT.part09.rar.html

Password:getbookz.blogspot.com

…widzisz chłopcze, stanąłeś oto naprzeciw Niegodziwości. Stoisz naprzeciw wszystkiego co Niecne, Złe, Nieczyste i czarne jak najczerniejsze odłamki nocy. Wszystkie historie babć snute po Spree, wszystkie wylane łzy nad nieszczęściem spływającym z Czarnej Wieży o Tysiącu Zębów. Oto, więc jestem! Jam jest Overlord! Jam jest Władca Ciemności i Ręka Zła, jam jest Miecz co ścina wszelką radość i ucisza wasze śmiechy! Jam jest Pan i Władca legionu demonicznych sług. A Ty? Ty zapuściłeś się w niewłaściwą stronę świata chłopcze. Zanurzyłeś stopy w mojej wodzie, stąpałeś po mojej trawie i miałeś czelność śmiać się w mojej ciszy! Za to czeka Cię sromotna kara, boś poczynił wielki błąd… Źle zrobiłeś igrając z Overlordem. Bardzo Źle…
A kim Wy jesteście co tu wbiegacie nieproszeni!? Halfing, Elf i reszta brudnego tałatajstwa, Siedmioro obszczajkundli. Żałosne! Zatem walczmy, nikt nie sprosta memu ostrzu- tu w szczycie mej Wieży, w sercu Zła. A Ty chłopcze patrz, jak kończą Ci co wchodzą mi w drogę!

FOR JU! FOR OVERLORD!
Na dzień dobry budzi Cię paskudna morda gremlinowatego stworzenia, które zdaje się dla Ciebie być kimś ważnym, kimś z kim coś Cię wiąże, coś niematerialnego, jakaś abstrakcyjna siła co nakazuje byś czynił rzeczy niemoralne, rzeczy okrutne, nawet nie odczuwasz tego znanego “wbrew twej woli”.
Ale co mogłoby wiązać kogoś takiego jak Ty z kimś tak paskudnym? I co to za uczucie? Kim w ogóle jesteś, ten ból głowy, ta więź, ta czarna zbroja, miecz…
Kim jestem?
Uważnie zatem wysłuchujesz historii mówionej przez goblinowatego.
A więc mam być kolejnym ciemiężycielem tej pięknej, zielonołąkej krainy bogatej w owce i inne cudne twory? Ale przecież z tego co mówisz Tamten został zgładzony przez siódemkę prawych herosów co się przeciw Niemu zebrali… Ale że opętało ich szaleństwo i obłęd? I mam być narzędziem zemsty, a każdemu z nich wymierzyć cios co będzie wyrównaniem rachunków? A Ci tu szkaradni i oślizgli mają mi w tym pomóc?
Najprościej odpowiadając: TAK!

FOR OVERLORD!
Zatem rozpoczynasz grę w miejscu o którym wyżej napisałem, a pierwsze minuty po przebudzeniu spędzasz na opanowywaniu swojej odrobinę okaleczonej przez amnezję motoryki. Wiesz już że masz być niedobry i wstrętny, wiesz że masz pomścić poprzedniego co taki był- plan obmyślisz potem, póki co nie jest oryginalnie i przebiegle, ale zło nie odpuszcza nikomu, dopadając wcześniej czy później każdego!
Naj-sam-wpierw Twym nikczemnym zadaniem jest obicie jednego z podwładnych, tego co robi za błazna i jak każdy królewski błazen jest niezwykle irytujący, a żeby było zabawniej te samo zadanie dajesz swoim podwładnym… Co by nie myślał, że życie będzie miał z Tobą lekkie.

A oni…
Pod swoje władanie dostajesz zatem „gejzery” wypełnione czymś co najłatwiej nazwać „esencją”, „esencja” to energia, którą otrzymujesz po zgładzeniu żywej istoty niezależnie od jej wielkości. Nie ma więc znaczenia czy ubijesz żuka, żabę, owcę (co robisz najchętniej, jako że są takie urocze), człowieka, trolla, czy inne mistyczno-fantastyczne stworzenie których pełno w tej obrzydliwie słodkiej krainie (choć za różne stwory, dostajesz różne gatunki esencji). W zasadzie to zaczyna Cię drażnić, że jest taka idealna i faktycznie masz ochotę coś zniszczyć.
By nie odbiegać jednak od jakże istotnego tematu Twojej armii: owa zebrana esencja, ma różne barwy- pośrednio połączone z pewnymi żywiołami, czy też siłami. Zepsuta Żółć, krwista czerwień, toksyczna zieleń i dławiący błękit- zapytasz pewnie: na co to? Każdy kolor odpowiada pewnym „gejzerom” i zdobywasz go z konkretnych istot, „gejzery” znów przywołują konkretne rodzaje Twych okrutnych i potężnych demonów!
(w zasadzie to One nie są potężne, dodatkowo trochę też durne w sumie to są małe i chuderlawe, mózgami też nie grzeszą… ale jakże niezwykle wierne i oddane- a to tu najważniejsze bowiem armia Złego odda za Niego życie bez wahania!)
I tak tu jest. By jednak uwolnić Twe piekielne ogary o zróżnicowanych mocach niezbędne są ich wylęgarnie, które znajdziesz gdzieś na ziemiach, które wcześniej czy później będziesz podbijał. Mimo, że masz wolną rękę w eksplorowaniu sympatycznego świata, do niektórych miejsc dostaniesz się tylko z pomocą swoich Minionów o konkretnych zdolnościach. Tylko zielone mogą niszczyć toksyczne rośliny i rozpędzać trucizny (dodatkowo sprytnie robią się niewidzialne i sztyletują wrogów po plecach, jakże to nikczemne), czerwone pożerają płomień i miotają we wrogów płonącymi kulami siarki, a niebieskie kroczą po wodzie i potrafią wskrzeszać, niczym sami wiecie Kto. Pozostają więc tylko żółte, podstawowe- lecz niezastąpione i dostępne już od początku, najsilniejsze, najokrutniejsze i jedyne które ubierają się w elementy rynsztunku po zgładzonych wrogach (pozostali też coś zakładają, ale efekty wizualnego tego są raczej znikome).
Z braku laku założą na głowę też dynię, czy czapkę kucharską- jak już mówiłem, nie są zbyt rozgarnięte i nie wiedzą że dynią to „se mogą”.
Wielkość Twojej armii zwiększa się wraz ze zbieraniem nowych posągów (mamy różne rodzaje, są takie które dodają energii/many na stałe, są nowym czarem, albo wspomniane przed wtrąceniem), poukrywane skrzętnie po całej krainie. Takie posągi chłopaki biorą na barki i zanoszą do portalu, dzięki którym łatwiej podróżować po świecie. Co znalazłeś możesz obejrzeć w swojej wieży do której masz dostęp przez cały czas trwania gry, a co tam jest?
Czarna wieża to : Twoja okrutna i nikczemna Pani- jeśli już jakąś uwiedziesz swoim niewiele mówiącym (w bezpośrednim znaczeniu tego słowa i pośrednim) licem, sala tronowa, serce podziemi przy którym spoczywają wylęgarnie, kuźnia w której kosztem życia podwładnych i zdobytych skarbów możesz wytopić nowe magiczne artefakty, utwardzić zbroję, dodać czar regeneracji na napierśnik, usprawnić rynsztunek swoich siepaczy itp.- wszystko za sprawą kombinacji liczb podwładnych jakiegoś rodzaju, który wyślesz do kotła, albo idziesz tam by po prostu popatrzeć jak radośnie wskakują na bombę do płynnej stali.
Arena na której możesz wyzwać każdą pokonaną i nędzną jednostkę-przy okazji zdobyć „esencję”, kaski dla Żółtych, czy kilka srebrników.
U góry pokoje do których zyskasz dostęp w późniejszym etapie gry i dodatkowo opcja “Pimp Up My Tower!”. Złotem wykupujesz nowe lansiarskie ozdoby do swojej z początku zapuszczonej i meliniarskiej wieży, a tu do wyboru: więcej kolców, jeszcze więcej kolców, banery, chimery, trony, zwieńczenia i kolce… Generalnie to jest na co wydawać pieniążki, a zdobywasz je jak już mówiłem z poległych, albo z plądrowania!
Fajnie? Wpuszczasz hołotę do wioski i kolejno ładujesz ich w każde z domostw. Wynoszą ze środka co najlepsze, eliksiry, rynsztunek, pieniążki, oraz czasem partyzantem zachlewają pałę. Wychodzą wtedy z takimi świecącymi oczkami i oddają mocz tuż przed progiem. Urocze, prawda?
W tej grze po prostu chcesz być złym, nie widzę sensu bycia dobrym w grze, w której założenie to bycie złym: możesz co prawda być bardziej lub mniej złym, jednak skoro już masz szansę i nie dostajesz XP za cudowne, praworządne odpowiedzi i działania jak w Baldurs Gate, a wręcz odwrotnie- dostajesz achievmenty i tytuły za bycie okrutnym, więc bądź złym do szpiku…. Niech klękają przed Tobą niewierni!
Kradnij jedzenie, morduj, grab, pal i gwałć!
Nie ma litości w końcu „poprzedniego” ubili… Odpłać im tym na co zasługują!

Bad to the bone!
Wbrew temu co można sądzić po tym co napisałem powyżej, gra nie jest okrutna- definitywnie odwrotnie (choć dzieciom do lat 12 jej raczej nie polecam). Pełna czarnego humoru, cynicznych tekstów narratora i Twej pani na temat życia, istot i środowiska – polecam na chandrę ich reakcje na spotkania z duchami Elfów.
Sam wygląd Minionów budzi śmiech, te czapki, peruki, ganianie z ręka zombiaka. Warto się przyglądać takim perełkom, warto też obserwować świat, które nie jest ogromny, aczkolwiek są w nim miejsca sielankowe, są też szare lasy i ponure bagna, są lochy i miasta… Są pola dyni i słoneczników, które chcesz niszczyć, a Twoje stado „szarańczy” wygląda śmiechowo podczas pogromu w słonecznikach.
W zasadzie podczas grania to chce się niszczyć wszystko, gra daje ogromną frajdę, totalnie rozładowywuje napięcie- momentami może i monotonna, bo biegniesz 30 minut przez jaskinie, czy tunele, ale karykatury zepsutych herosów, świat z drugiej strony lustra- powykręcany i chory jak w najgorszej możliwej wizji Alicji z Krainy Czarów. Żarłoczne, zepsute hobbity i ich pękato-szalony król, Oberon pochłonięty własnymi koszmarami, łaknące krwii jednorożce. W pewnym momencie zdajemy sobie sprawę, że w tym świecie słodkim i karmelkowym zdarzają się istoty bardziej pożarte złem niż my…
Nie jest to horror zdecydowanie, raczej gra zręcznościowa z elementami RPG, doprawiona szczyptą strategicznego zmysłu i posypana ogromną porcją angielskiego humoru dla dojrzalszej części graczy.

Światła magii, skrzek Minionów i mechanika
Grafika jest przyjemna i stara się czerpać z każdej gamy kolorów, jest odrobinę kanciasto i sztywnie (vide poruszanie bohatera), ale przejrzyście i ciekawie. Stworzonka (mój ulubiony to Melvin), twarze, owce, kolory, światła – wszystko jest ładne i nie ma co oczekiwać graficznych fajerwerków. Jest schludnie- upiększa to ogromna porcja zepsutego humoru bez zębów
Ogromne brawa za dźwięki i głosy minionów, doradcy i błazna, ton i wysokość dźwięków wydawanych przez ich malutkie struny głosowe- to jest przepiękne, ktoś przyłożył ogromne starania by nasze Impy brzmiały tak jak to sobie wyobrażaliśmy- skrzekliwie, wysoko i zabawnie! Maluchy rzucają proste teksty pełne miłości do swojego Pana typu „For You!” „For Overlord!” „Master, Treasure!”, są tak fajne i zabawne , że od czasu do czasu trzeba je kopnąć albo wysłać do garka (pokochałem je już na wstępie, małe, wredne, zepsute i niszczące wszystko co popadnie)…
Dalej mamy przejrzyste menu, łatwy do zapamiętania projekt wieży, odrobinę pokręcony świat, który jednak dzięki portalom jest prosty do ogarnięcia- łatwo dostać się do wszystkich najważniejszych miejsc, gdzie zwykle przy teleportowaniu, albo po jakiejś animacji następuje save.
Są jednak i problemy. Dla przykładu: walka- ogromnie brakuje możliwości bloku, zostaje tylko walenie na pałę i robienie szybkich uników przy „targetowaniu” na postaci, cios jest jeden – więc mashujemy jak leci. Dostajemy za to kilka przyjemnych czarów, które rozwijamy poprzez daleko u góry omawiane „Zagubione posągi”- jest magiczna tarcza, zwolnienie, szał, jest też fireball (nie ma to jak podpalić zboże kiedy wew. ktoś się kryje). Standardowo i wystarczająco, hp i mp uzupełniane poprzez poświęcanie minionów na ołtarzach, eliksiry, oraz powrót do wieży.
Problem jest również z kontrolowaniem minionów, czasem chcesz zrobić jakąś szczwaną akcję typu: szybkie zmienianie typu gobasów trigerem, dawanie komend, „guard place” by czerwoni się ostrzeliwali, a biali leczyli i szybkiego manipulowanie prawym drążkiem by manualnie gdzieś doprowadzić żółtych (jest możliwość sterowania gałką, jak też dawania prostych komend- akcja i powrót pod dwoma przyciskami) sprawia, że się w tym gubimy i wychodzi kupa. AI stworzonek też głupkowate, pytanie czy chodzi o celowość czy po prostu braki- zdarza się że gupole się gdzieś zgubią, albo wejdą za Tobą do wody, czy popełnią jakieś inne głupstwo… wtedy klops.

W klimacie gra nawiązuje bezpośrednio do klasyki filmów i książek fantasy: pełna prostej symboliki, Tolkienowskich stworzeń, czy Szekspirowskich tekstów i bohaterów, nie mogło się też obyć bez mitologii. Za co wielki plus, dostajemy misz-masz fantasy w którym mamy szansę być kimś podłym.
Ja tam się starałem jak mogłem i zbierałem punkty korupcji jak leci (poziom naszego zepsucia w grze)- polecam bycie złym, bezkonsekwencyjne dręczenie świata to piękna sprawa. Przymknijcie oko na nierozbudowaną fabułę, posłuchajcie czystej miłości wypowiadanej przez kurdupli, spalcie wioskę, okradajcie, bijcie i cieszcie się z bycia złym- świat widziany z innej perspektywy jest również piękny!

Ocena:8

Plusy:
-pomysły na bycie złym
-portale i gejzery w strategicznych miejscach
-zły humor (dynie na głowach to klasyk!)
-zła armia
-dodatki w złej wieży (mała rzecz, a cieszy)
-alchemia
-Miniony
-piękne dzwięki
-świat

Minusy:
-animacja głównego bohatera
-problemy ze sterowaniem armią
-brak bindowanych eliksirów pod przyciskami
-kamera za która ktoś powinien zabić osobę za to odpowiedzialną
-kiepska walka wręcz
-momentami monotonne
-totalny brak mapy/minimapy – czegokolwiek co mogloby czasem ulatwic orientacje w terenie

Uth poleca.
Ps. Tekst pisany chyba półtora roku temu, ale wrzucony w związku z ostatnim objawieniem drugiej części tej kapitalnej gry, którą zrecenzuje w przyszłości, tak byście mogli mieć całościowy pogląd na serię Overlord.

سلام

به شخصه که عاشق این بازی هستم یعنی OVERLORD بازی فوق العاده زیبایی هستش که به همگی پیشنهاد دانلود میشه خیلی زیبا ساخته شده هم اسمش زیباست هم خودش

تصاویری از بازی : کلیک کنید

لینک دانلود در ادامه مطلب …

http://hotfile.com/dl/12926254/d1ad212/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part01.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/12926475/36cf89b/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part02.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/12926719/59bc438/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part03.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/12926981/3acdeba/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part04.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/12927161/bd18b5e/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part05.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/12927344/9f07c59/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part06.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/12927476/262b569/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part07.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/12927617/a8f8d32/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part08.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/12927777/92c140f/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part09.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/12928397/332b66a/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part10.rar.html

http://hotfile.com/dl/12928429/2c5de26/Overlord.2.ENG-Repack.part11.rar.html

The game has been out for a couple months now, but I’m just now getting a chance to review it. If you wanna know what I thought, check out the other side.

I first came across this game at E3 where I got a limited look while Josh played the demo for about 5 minutes. That was enough to catch his interest. A couple weeks after the game came out, we went to pick it up and I got my first real look at the game. You start the game as a young “witch-boy” in the town of Nordburg. A handful of brown minions find you and declare you a suitable replacement for their overlord. After causing mayhem around Nordburg, you follow the minions to the minion burrows before a quick cut to an older you. After doing some running around and learning the ropes of overlording, you find out the empire is working on eliminating all magical creatures (both good and evil alike). After fighting with the elves for a while, you eventually team up with them and work together to fight the empire. That is until you turn Queen Fay evil. Then the elves don’t like you again.

While there are some minor glitches and other issues with the gameplay, Overlord II is actually a lot of fun. The minions add a lot of humor as they pick up treasure “For the Overlord,” enjoy all the things you tell them to pick up, and tell their mounts “You be my friend.” If you’re looking for a good single player game to pick up, go buy a copy of Overlord II. It’s fun and not too difficult. If you’re looking for a multiplayer game, this is not a game for you. The game features different online multiplayer games, but they really aren’t that fun. If you’re playing the game for the trophies, I’d suggest renting a second copy for a friend to help you with the online trophies.

Overlord II Trophy List
Buy Overlord 2

Seconda parte del mio viaggio in Normandia. Dopo aver visitato Rouen, Fecamp ed Etretat ho attraversato il Pont de Normandie, (imponente struttura che scavalca la foce della Senna) per giungere nel bellissimo porto normanno di Honfleur. A seguire, costeggiando il mare…

[Leggi tutto l'articolo]

Bald hier zu lesen: Meine Meinung zu Shadow Complex, dem neuen superduper Xbox Arcade Titel. Zuerst muss ich mir das Spiel allerdings erstmal kaufen.

Ausserdem: Ich habe gestern Overlord 2 durchgespielt. Und ich würde ja eine Kompletteinführung dazu machen, aber irgendwie hab ich keine Lust.

Overlord 2 ist ganz einfach so wie Overlord 1, nur besser. Wer den ersten Teil mochte, findet den zweiten geil. Das Spiel ist deutlich für Kinder gemacht. Es ist also so einfach, nicht fordernd… und driftet leider oft mal ins übertrieben alberne.

Im besten Fall sorgt der Humor des Spiels für Sätze wie die folgenden beiden, die von unterworfenen Dorfbewohnern stammen :
-Wir sind hier jetzt alle schrecklich, schrecklich böse, mein Lord!
-”Böse” ist mein zweiter Vorname. Direkt nach “Hermine”.
… und im schlechtesten Fall für folgenden Satz, dein eine der mätressen des Overlords von sich gibt:
- Ich bin böse, du bist böse, muss ich noch irgendwas sagen?

Ansonsten: Es gibt hier ein Lets play von Valdis358, der einem das ganze Spiel vorspielt. Das sollte deutlich mehr aussagen als irgend eine Demo oder eine Meinung.

Overlord II was a game of was looking forward to playing and reviewing. I have never played the original but I know it was a sleeper hit and was liked by reviews and gamers alike. I was burned out of shooters and it looked like this was going to be the breath of fresh air that I was looking for.

I first started to have my doubts about 5 minutes into the prologue when I learned that the plot was ripped almost word for word from the movie Shrek.  An empire that bares a striking resemblance to Rome is scouring the lands for magical creatures to enslave. Both Overlord II and Shrek also are based in a world that attempts to mock Fantasy (both doing quite admirably in that regard). The difference is that instead of a lovable Ogre who is a reluctant hero, you play an evil mute Wizard Overlord who is intent on destroying or enslaving the world.

The problem with this is that though you spend a part of the game fighting hippie elves, your main enemy is in fact the evil empire. How is the gamer supposed to feel like an evil overlord when half of the time I am fighting an equally evil empire? I mean, if the main antagonist, or I guess in this case protagonist, was actually good perhaps the concept of being evil would actually shine through.

They actual gameplay is just as flawed. The player spends most of his time commanding a horde of his minions to do the dirty work. While this was one of the main selling points of the game, I found the mechanics to be incredibly boring. Commanding your minions was just not done in an enjoyable way. The player sends his horde into the fray with a flick of the right analog stick or by placing minions at a banner. The player also has the ability to strike at his enemies or cast spells himself but even that is just boring one button mashing.

In a game like this you would think there would be some strategy involved but unfortunately besides the obvious puzzles in which you need the other four minion types,  you could make it though the game using your melee minions almost exclusively.

In fact the only enjoyable part of the minion system was leveling up and seeing all the various equipment my minions picked up from fallen enemies. I thought this small detail was interesting and this along with the various minion mounts breathed a little bit of life into this game.

The sanctuary was another idea that seemed like a good idea but it ended up being a chore. The problem was that the sanctuary was way too big and to do any task meant suffering through a couple of long loading screens which eventually agitated me to the point where it wasn’t worth it to revive a fallen minion or search for collectables.

The player can also recruit concubines throughout the game and can enjoy them at the sanctuary though this feature seemed kind of tacked on and lack any merit besides achievements. Its almost like the developers wanted to throw sex into the game just because.

There are also some multiplayer modes available though when I got on to try them out I could not find a partner. The fact that the multiplayer is already dead this soon after release makes me think that it was a horrible feature that was just kind of thrown in there, but again I never got a chance to try for myself.

The game is not without it’s charm though, there were a few moments in the game that actually made me smile however few are far between these moments were. The game created a interesting world they just forgot to populate it with anything fun.

If you are thinking about buying this game, I would urge you to rent it first, or better yet rent the movie Shrek which was actually good.

Attention all Evil Overlord List Aspirants: Contrary to popular belief, taking over the universe is not as easy as it would first appear. Due to the complexity of this task, Peter regrets that he is currently unable to give the list the attention it deserves. The list is therefore going on a temporary hiatus. This is a temporary condition. As soon as he is able to respond in a timely manner — or until he becomes unquestioned lord and master of all things, whichever comes first — the list will not be updated and no new suggestions will be considered. He would sincerely apologize for this inconvenience, were it in character for an Evil Overlord to do so.

Evil Overlord List is Copyright 1996-1997 by Peter Anspach. If you enjoy it, feel free to pass it along or post it anywhere, provided that (1) it is not altered in any way, and (2) this copyright notice is attached.

1. My Legions of Terror will have helmets with clear plexiglass visors, not face-concealing ones.
2. My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through.
3. My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed, not kept anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell of my dungeon.
4. Shooting is not too good for my enemies.
5. The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.
6. I will not gloat over my enemies’ predicament before killing them.
7. When I’ve captured my adversary and he says, “Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?” I’ll say, “No.” and shoot him. No, on second thought I’ll shoot him then say “No.”
8. After I kidnap the beautiful princess, we will be married immediately in a quiet civil ceremony, not a lavish spectacle in three weeks’ time during which the final phase of my plan will be carried out.
9. I will not include a self-destruct mechanism unless absolutely necessary. If it is necessary, it will not be a large red button labelled “Danger: Do Not Push”. The big red button marked “Do Not Push” will instead trigger a spray of bullets on anyone stupid enough to disregard it. Similarly, the ON/OFF switch will not clearly be labelled as such.
10. I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum — a small hotel well outside my borders will work just as well.
11. I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need to prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving my weaker enemies alive to show they pose no threat.
12. One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.
13. All slain enemies will be cremated, or at least have several rounds of ammunition emptied into them, not left for dead at the bottom of the cliff. The announcement of their deaths, as well as any accompanying celebration, will be deferred until after the aforementioned disposal.
14. The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, a last cigarette, or any other form of last request.
15. I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117 and the hero is just putting his plan into operation.
16. I will never utter the sentence “But before I kill you, there’s just one thing I want to know.”
17. When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to their advice.
18. I will not have a son. Although his laughably under-planned attempt to usurp power would easily fail, it would provide a fatal distraction at a crucial point in time.
19. I will not have a daughter. She would be as beautiful as she was evil, but one look at the hero’s rugged countenance and she’d betray her own father.
20. Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it’s too easy to miss unexpected developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly.
21. I will hire a talented fashion designer to create original uniforms for my Legions of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make them look like Nazi stormtroopers, Roman footsoldiers, or savage Mongol hordes. All were eventually defeated and I want my troops to have a more positive mind-set.
22. No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I will not consume any energy field bigger than my head.
23. I will keep a special cache of low-tech weapons and train my troops in their use. That way — even if the heroes manage to neutralize my power generator and/or render the standard-issue energy weapons useless — my troops will not be overrun by a handful of savages armed with spears and rocks.
24. I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strengths and weaknesses. Even though this takes some of the fun out of the job, at least I will never utter the line “No, this cannot be! I AM INVINCIBLE!!!” (After that, death is usually instantaneous.)
25. No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and virtually inaccessible vulnerable spot.
26. No matter how attractive certain members of the rebellion are, there is probably someone just as attractive who is not desperate to kill me. Therefore, I will think twice before ordering a prisoner sent to my bedchamber.
27. I will never build only one of anything important. All important systems will have redundant control panels and power supplies. For the same reason I will always carry at least two fully loaded weapons at all times.
28. My pet monster will be kept in a secure cage from which it cannot escape and into which I could not accidentally stumble.
29. I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies into confusion.
30. All bumbling conjurers, clumsy squires, no-talent bards, and cowardly thieves in the land will be preemptively put to death. My foes will surely give up and abandon their quest if they have no source of comic relief.
31. All naive, busty tavern wenches in my realm will be replaced with surly, world-weary waitresses who will provide no unexpected reinforcement and/or romantic subplot for the hero or his sidekick.
32. I will not fly into a rage and kill a messenger who brings me bad news just to illustrate how evil I really am. Good messengers are hard to come by.
33. I won’t require high-ranking female members of my organization to wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual dress-code. Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for formal occasions.
34. I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.
35. I will not grow a goatee. In the old days they made you look diabolic. Now they just make you look like a disaffected member of Generation X.
36. I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cell block, let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.
37. If my trusted lieutenant tells me my Legions of Terror are losing a battle, I will believe him. After all, he’s my trusted lieutenant.
38. If an enemy I have just killed has a younger sibling or offspring anywhere, I will find them and have them killed immediately, instead of waiting for them to grow up harboring feelings of vengeance towards me in my old age.
39. If I absolutely must ride into battle, I will certainly not ride at the forefront of my Legions of Terror, nor will I seek out my opposite number among his army.
40. I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable superweapon, I will use it as early and as often as possible instead of keeping it in reserve.
41. Once my power is secure, I will destroy all those pesky time-travel devices.
42. When I capture the hero, I will make sure I also get his dog, monkey, ferret, or whatever sickeningly cute little animal capable of untying ropes and filching keys happens to follow him around.
43. I will maintain a healthy amount of skepticism when I capture the beautiful rebel and she claims she is attracted to my power and good looks and will gladly betray her companions if I just let her in on my plans.
44. I will only employ bounty hunters who work for money. Those who work for the pleasure of the hunt tend to do dumb things like even the odds to give the other guy a sporting chance.
45. I will make sure I have a clear understanding of who is responsible for what in my organization. For example, if my general screws up I will not draw my weapon, point it at him, say “And here is the price for failure,” then suddenly turn and kill some random underling.
46. If an advisor says to me “My liege, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?”, I will reply “This.” and kill the advisor.
47. If I learn that a callow youth has begun a quest to destroy me, I will slay him while he is still a callow youth instead of waiting for him to mature.
48. I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology with respect and kindness. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will not immediately come after me for revenge.
49. If I learn the whereabouts of the one artifact which can destroy me, I will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper.
50. My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks.
51. If one of my dungeon guards begins expressing concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess’ cell, I will immediately transfer him to a less people-oriented position.
52. I will hire a team of board-certified architects and surveyors to examine my castle and inform me of any secret passages and abandoned tunnels that I might not know about.
53. If the beautiful princess that I capture says “I’ll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!”, I will say “Oh well” and kill her.
54. I will not strike a bargain with a demonic being then attempt to double-cross it simply because I feel like being contrary.
55. The deformed mutants and odd-ball psychotics will have their place in my Legions of Terror. However before I send them out on important covert missions that require tact and subtlety, I will first see if there is anyone else equally qualified who would attract less attention.
56. My Legions of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for target practice.
57. Before employing any captured artifacts or machinery, I will carefully read the owner’s manual.
58. If it becomes necessary to escape, I will never stop to pose dramatically and toss off a one-liner.
59. I will never build a sentient computer smarter than I am.
60. My five-year-old child advisor will also be asked to decipher any code I am thinking of using. If he breaks the code in under 30 seconds, it will not be used. Note: this also applies to passwords.
61. If my advisors ask “Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?”, I will not proceed until I have a response that satisfies them.
62. I will design fortress hallways with no alcoves or protruding structural supports which intruders could use for cover in a firefight.
63. Bulk trash will be disposed of in incinerators, not compactors. And they will be kept hot, with none of that nonsense about flames going through accessible tunnels at predictable intervals.
64. I will see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a disadvantage.
65. If I must have computer systems with publically available terminals, the maps they display of my complex will have a room clearly marked as the Main Control Room. That room will be the Execution Chamber. The actual main control room will be marked as Sewage Overflow Containment.
66. My security keypad will actually be a fingerprint scanner. Anyone who watches someone press a sequence of buttons or dusts the pad for fingerprints then subsequently tries to enter by repeating that sequence will trigger the alarm system.
67. No matter how many shorts we have in the system, my guards will be instructed to treat every surveillance camera malfunction as a full-scale emergency.
68. I will spare someone who saved my life sometime in the past. This is only reasonable as it encourages others to do so. However, the offer is good one time only. If they want me to spare them again, they’d better save my life again.
69. All midwives will be banned from the realm. All babies will be delivered at state-approved hospitals. Orphans will be placed in foster-homes, not abandoned in the woods to be raised by creatures of the wild.
70. When my guards split up to search for intruders, they will always travel in groups of at least two. They will be trained so that if one of them disappears mysteriously while on patrol, the other will immediately initiate an alert and call for backup, instead of quizzically peering around a corner.
71. If I decide to test a lieutenant’s loyalty and see if he/she should be made a trusted lieutenant, I will have a crack squad of marksmen standing by in case the answer is no.
72. If all the heroes are standing together around a strange device and begin to taunt me, I will pull out a conventional weapon instead of using my unstoppable superweapon on them.
73. I will not agree to let the heroes go free if they win a rigged contest, even though my advisors assure me it is impossible for them to win.
74. When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details, I will not label the disk “Project Overlord” and leave it lying on top of my desk.
75. I will instruct my Legions of Terror to attack the hero en masse, instead of standing around waiting while members break off and attack one or two at a time.
76. If the hero runs up to my roof, I will not run up after him and struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also not engage him at the edge of a cliff. (In the middle of a rope-bridge over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.)
77. If I have a fit of temporary insanity and decide to give the hero the chance to reject a job as my trusted lieutentant, I will retain enough sanity to wait until my current trusted lieutenant is out of earshot before making the offer.
78. I will not tell my Legions of Terror “And he must be taken alive!” The command will be “And try to take him alive if it is reasonably practical.”
79. If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into limited-edition commemorative coins.
80. If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a hero, I will send out my best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as he gets closer and closer to my fortress.
81. If I am fighting with the hero atop a moving platform, have disarmed him, and am about to finish him off and he glances behind me and drops flat, I too will drop flat instead of quizzically turning around to find out what he saw.
82. I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front of the crucial support beam to a heavy, dangerous, unbalanced structure.
83. If I’m eating dinner with the hero, put poison in his goblet, then have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him.
84. I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the opposite sex.
85. I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly complicated, e.g. “Align the 12 Stones of Power on the sacred altar then activate the medallion at the moment of total eclipse.” Instead it will be more along the lines of “Push the button.”
86. I will make sure that my doomsday device is up to code and properly grounded.
87. My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use. Also, I will not construct walkways above them.
88. If a group of henchmen fail miserably at a task, I will not berate them for incompetence then send the same group out to try the task again.
89. After I captures the hero’s superweapon, I will not immediately disband my legions and relax my guard because I believe whoever holds the weapon is unstoppable. After all, the hero held the weapon and I took it from him.
90. I will not design my Main Control Room so that every workstation is facing away from the door.
91. I will not ignore the messenger that stumbles in exhausted and obviously agitated until my personal grooming or current entertainment is finished. It might actually be important.
92. If I ever talk to the hero on the phone, I will not taunt him. Instead I will say this his dogged perseverance has given me new insight on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few months of quiet contemplation I will likely return to the path of righteousness. (Heroes are incredibly gullible in this regard.)
93. If I decide to hold a double execution of the hero and an underling who failed or betrayed me, I will see to it that the hero is scheduled to go first.
94. When arresting prisoners, my guards will not allow them to stop and grab a useless trinket of purely sentimental value.
95. My dungeon will have its own qualified medical staff complete with bodyguards. That way if a prisoner becomes sick and his cellmate tells the guard it’s an emergency, the guard will fetch a trauma team instead of opening up the cell for a look.
96. My door mechanisms will be designed so that blasting the control panel on the outside seals the door and blasting the control panel on the inside opens the door, not vice versa.
97. My dungeon cells will not be furnished with objects that contain reflective surfaces or anything that can be unravelled.
98. If an attractive young couple enters my realm, I will carefully monitor their activities. If I find they are happy and affectionate, I will ignore them. However if circumstance have forced them together against their will and they spend all their time bickering and criticizing each other except during the intermittent occasions when they are saving each others’ lives at which point there are hints of sexual tension, I will immediately order their execution.
99. Any data file of crucial importance will be padded to 1.45Mb in size.
100. Finally, to keep my subjects permanently locked in a mindless trance, I will provide each of them with free unlimited Internet access.

Of course, these are merely the Top 100 Things I’d do. Other suggestions have been sent to me which didn’t quite make the Top 100 List. But they are still so good that I couldn’t bear to throw them out. Therefore, as an expression of gratitude, I have tossed them into…

and

Then the time was finally here, and I got to play the new ‘Overlord II’,-Its as wacky and humorous cool as the first one was, and you got even more stuff to play around with in the sequel. For those of you that do not know what game I’m talking about, shame on you, and hurry to the gameshop and buy the first one, and when you have finished it, and made a shrine in my honor for showing you the way, you can look forward to endless hours with joy, playing the sequel.

Your goal in life, as a minion with an attitude, is to become the next Overlord and reign the underworld and the land above with terror and fright. You got your trusted minions with you, a bunch of misserable, drinking, fighting, low life scums of the underworld, to help you gain the ‘respect’ you demand from the world above, cause they seems to have forgotten what you can do with a pair of tweezers and a keg of TNT. The humor in the game is priceless, and the gameplay is really good. Graphics is a mix between fantasy and christmas-cards (hard to explain, take a look for yourself) and I have had a very good time playing it so far.

Here is the official trailer for the game, and if you take a look at youtube for “Overlord 2 gameplay” you will find a lot more clips .