Silly me.

V will be three in four months and he still uses them.  I say ‘them’ because he has several and he takes great pleasure in choosing which one he wants to use.

I’m not worried about him growing out of it (He will grow out of it, won’t he?) – I just find it irritating that the damn thing is always in his mouth.

It started out as a soother.  It became a necessity for nap/bed time.  Now whenever he’s cranky or sulky, he wants his chupa (pacifier).  He’s cranky and/or sulky A LOT.  He wants his chupa ALL the time.  I’ve managed to restrict some of his times.  For example, he’s not allowed to take one to nursery any more.  He can use one in the car, but he’s not allowed to take it with him when we leave the car (wherever we’re going), etc.

I’ve asked people for their advice, I’ve read others’ posts about their kids and giving up their pacifiers and tried to take it all into consideration.  In fact, it was after reading this post by motherventing that I decided to broach the subject with him.

Me: Vinay, you know by Christmas time you’ll be a very big boy…

I chose Christmas as it gives him a long time to prepare himself.  Don’t think it matters though, he still says ‘yesterday’ for three weeks ago.

V: Yes.

Me: At Christmas time, you should give all your chupas away to the little babies that don’t have any chupas.  And then Santa will bring you a very big present.

V: Yes, I want Santa to bring me a big big present.

Me: And he will.  But first you have to give your chupas to the small babies.

Silence for thirty seconds.

V: No.  I don’t want any presents from Santa.

Great.  Now what?

Should I keep talking about it?  Or should I just leave it?

Contoured shield with ventilation holes
Contains Silicone Orthodontic Nipple
Kid tested, Dentist approved
complies with EEC directive 90/128/EEC
complies with 16 CFR 1511 requirements for pacifiers

Includes pacifier.

List Price: $ …

I believe keeping a keen eye on safety is very important but also know that parents can be careful to the point of causing more danger to their kids.

The first area where ultra-cautious parents endanger their kids is by being “chokeaphobics”.

Baby’s first solid foods can drive, some parents, crazy. There are lists of foods that I would never feed children under four.

• whole hot dogs
• whole grapes
  

  Young couple with baby. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

• peanuts (most nuts) but walnut meats are softer than most.
• sticky, chewy candy like gummy bears
• hard candies
• popcorn (sometimes okay)

You see, at about a year old, kids have their first exposure to chewing food for swallowing. Gagging can be an alarming sound but it is a noise from a reflex which alerts the child to chew. The sound also lets us know that his/her airway is not obstructed. Up to the time of the first solids, babies are gulpers. Parents who “cream” everything and avoid approved baby “munchies” just because gagging frightens them, are encouraging their baby to continue gulping. Chewing must be learned and the earlier, the better. An over-protected eater will have more gagging and choking episodes in later years when other kids are chewing things, like popcorn, without incident.

Then there are the “germaphobic” parents.

Germs are not all bad and even those which offer colds and stomach bugs, have value. Unless your child has a compromised immune system, let them mingle.

Babies are clean slates. Their immune systems are too. As much as we dislike a sick baby, the illness makes baby stronger. Children who rarely get to play and exchange germs with each other, will not only be in for a “plague” of illness when they go to school, they may really get sicker when they are older before they are exposed.

To me, the worst over protection is what I’ll call, the “bumpaphobic” parents.

You’ve seen them. The ones who interrupt “rough and tumble” play at every opportunity.

Kids are pretty sturdy creatures. Their bodies are developing many groups of muscles, and sadly, there is not manufactured child-safe equipment suitable for every need. Kids who aren’t challenged by uneven ground (they will fall)or jumping off of steps (they will fall) or climbing up things that cannot hold their weight (they will fall) are deprived of lessons in balance, depth perception and the physics of living with gravity. Too the extreme, “bumpaphobic” parents create clumsy, accident prone kids who won’t keep up with their peers.

These are my biggest over-protective peeves. I’ve witnessed every one in my day care experience of 38 years and thought I’d warn parents OR give a printable text to offer someone who is witnessing over-protection.

Related articles

• Parents licking a pacifier ‘clean’ may boost baby’s immune system (fox5sandiego.com)
• Don’t Clean Your Baby’s Pacifier Off In The Sink If It Hits The Floor – Suck On It, Says Study (consumerist.com)
• For the need to chew!! (chewigem.wordpress.com)
• Study says baby’s spit-cleaned pacifier is OK (wqad.com)

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Sincere version of Springtime for Hitler staged in Germany.

Average American can only retire when he’s ten years dead.

The “like the smell of your own” phenomenon: Americans hate congress, like their congressman.

Parents who suck their babies’ pacifiers risk projectile vomit retaliation.

People with dogs have a reduced risk of cardio-vascular disease but an increased risk of heartworm.

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President Obama says we have not yet crossed the red line where he makes the Jacksonville Jaguars take Tim Tebow.

Kobe Bryant sues his mom for Mothers Day, even though the damage is long done.

Under the new law in Minnesota, Minneapolitans can marry St. Paulists.

Stamp prices up again–worth a run for congress just for the franking.

Visiting Prince Harry manages to keep tunic on and curtains closed, but its only day 4.

At the movies, it’s Great Caesar’s Gatsby in 3D!
The Great Kool Aid Acid Test Gatsby.

Although Fitzgerald did write Gatsby for Viewmaster.

Governor Walker meets with the Dali Lama to see about getting some of that mandala work here in Wisconsin.

That’s All the News That Isn’t . . .

I found him with one paci in his mouth and one in each hand. Kid! This is over the top…we might need a pacintervention. Cute now…probably not when we try to say goodbye to Mr. Pacifier.

Still Life With Children

Here are the facts:

A few weeks ago, I visited my niece and her husband, a physician’s assistant and a lawyer, parents of two children under the age of four. They are also triathletes who will be competing in the Ironman 70.3 Vineman in Sonoma, California this July.

While looking for glasses in their kitchen, I happened upon this striking still life–a perfect Mother’s Day (and Father’s Day) photo. Crayons, pacifiers, flasks, Kahlua, bourbon, glasses, a crayon drawing, martini shaker, and some sort of sample medication in a tube. 

 Now what’s the story?? Any ideas?

A recent study has found that parents who clean their kid’s pacifier by sucking on it could be reducing that child’s risk of developing allergies. At age 18 months, children whose parents cleaned their child’s pacifier with their mouths were less likely to have asthma or eczema, according to the swedish study.

This is not the first study to suggest that, as far as kids are concerned, it’s not good to be too clean. The so-called “hygiene hypothesis” has accumulated a fair bit of evidence in recent years. The thinking goes that if exposure to bacteria and viruses is limited early in life, children face a greater chance of having allergies, asthma and other autoimmune problems during adulthood.

What about cleanliness is next to godliness?

There is a modern trend towards cleanliness and for a long time this was thought to improve health on every level. The modern trend has been towards a sterile environment, which has encouraged the ever-increasing use of consumer products like anti bacterial soaps. But are these necessarily a good thing?

In a laboratory study, people who used triclosan-based hand soaps had no fewer bacteria on their hands than people who washed with plain soap and water. Further studies have found that households using antibacterial hand soaps experience just as many instances of flus, colds, skin infections, and GI problems as households that just used plain old soap and water.

Allison Aielloa a lead researcher from the University of Michigan School of Public Health, after carrying out a review of research on anti bacterial soaps, concluded that there was no benefit to choosing triclosan-based hand soaps over plain soap. She also highlighted the possible risks of including triclosan in consumer products. Her main concern was that  widespread use of anti bacterial agents in consumer products could lead to resistant bacteria.

Furthermore, studies show that, contrary to expectations, a poor standard of living, not using antibiotics and early exposure to farm animals all appear to offer protection.

It seems that, in some instances at least, we can be too clean.

For a bit more of the science behind the theory:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC416594/

The research on antibacterial soap:

http://asquifyde.es/uploads/documentos/Consumer-antibacterial-soaps-Effective-or-just-risky-2007%20%28ingl%C3%A9s%29.pdf

and some shameless promotion:

http://www.optimalhealth4kids.co.uk/

Does how you clean your child’s pacifier affect whether they develop allergies or asthma? That is what this study set out to find. The researchers asked parents which of the following options they used to clean their baby’s pacifier, did they rinse it off with water, boil it or clean it in their mouth, and parents could choose more than one option. Then they followed the 184 infants involved in the study and a pediatric allergist checked them for asthma and allergies to pets, seasonal pollens, or food at 18 months old and 36 months old.

The allergist found when they checked the babies at 18 months that those whose parents had cleaned the pacifier using their own mouth had significantly lower rates of allergies, eczema and asthma. The findings were similar when they rechecked all of the babies at 36 months old. The doctors used a number of specific tests to determine if the babies had any allergies or asthma including measuring compounds in the blood that are elevated in any kind of allergy making the testing very thorough.

So how does sucking on your baby’s pacifier affect their chance of developing allergies and asthma? Well it all comes down to bugs, namely the very important probiotic bacteria that live in all of our mouths and digestive tracts. We have more bacterial cells in our digestive system than we do our own cells in our body. These bacteria have a number of very important functions but the one that applies here is that they help to tag or identify substances that are harmful to us. With the proper bacterial balance your body will identify a common allergen like pet dander or pollen from a flower as harmless and ignore it. If you do not have the proper bacterial balance to identify that pet dander or pollen then your body over-reacts, treats it like a harmful substance and tries to flush it out of your system by increasing mucous production in your nose and affecting your breathing. In order to get the proper bacterial balance in our system we need to acquire it from our environment. One of the ways we get it is from our parents. If a parent cleans their baby’s pacifier with their mouth they transfer the established bacteria from their body to their baby helping the baby to boost their own proper bacterial balance. This study also looked at if the babies in the study were born naturally or cesarean. They found those born naturally also caused them to have much lower chance of developing asthma or allergies for the same reasons. The baby is exposed to more of the mother’s bacteria during natural childbirth and is then sent home sooner. A cesarean birth is a sterilized procedure requiring a longer hospital stay, obviously in a sterile environment, and this overly clean start may cause the parent to be more fearful of germs.

The next time your baby drops their pacifier don’t’ feel bad if you can’t clean it. Just give it a lick! You’ll be giving your baby a boost of beneficial bacteria and be on your way!

Pediatrics Vol. 131, No. 6, June 2013

The little snot monsters have me so desperately wanting them to learn to blow their own noses, but let’s face it, they’d rather eat the tissue than use it for productive purposes. That being said, it got me thinking about the things my boys have learned in their short existence on this earth.  I have a calendar for each boy laying out significant dates; the first smile, the back to front roll over, first tooth, and even the first steps… What I don’t have recorded in that calendar though, is their lasts… Have you ever thought about the last time your baby did something, even something so simple but yet made you smile or laugh so hard you’d cry? Why have I not recorded any of those moments? When did they stop?

Abram, for instance, had the ability to kick, or rather run, for hours on end.  Here he was, happy as a clam laying on his back just running (say that with a ‘Forest Gump’ accent…run-naing).  I’m fairly certain he has run a few marathons in all those tiny little kicks. Sean and I were looking back over videos we had shared on Facebook of the boys and came across one of the many running videos (or we called it his “River Dance” in this video), and I had to stop and think when was the last time he had done that…when did he stop? Was it a progression or did he just quit cold turkey?  I can’t tell you.

I came across another one of Abram sucking on a pacifier which he hasn’t used in a long time unlike Liam.  He decided early on that the pacifier was too much work and that a thumb was easier to find in the middle of the night.  But did I make note of that in his calendar…no.  We did just recently pull Liam’s plug (so no more pacifier pictures from him), which was kind of awful for the first couple of days but he’s doing just fine without it.  But again, did I make note of that…no.

Abram sure does enjoy that thumb of his!

When did family nap time end?

This happens a lot the first month with twins…

When did milk coma’s or intimate chats on our knees end?

Propped up knees are the ultimate newborn ‘must have’ item.

Liam is a very expressive talker.

Or twin snuggles?

The moments that make your heart melt…

Liam’s awesome bubble blowing skills?

Liam, aka, tiny bubbles.

There are so many times I wish I could hit the fast forward button on life, but hitting pause would make me so happy.

Happy Mother’s Day…

…here’s to appreciating life’s littlest moments.

November 2012 (almost 2 years old)

When it came time to say goodbye, I struggled (right alongside my husband) with the fear of the unknown. All we knew was that she loved it so much that if we kept it from her, earth shattering tantrums would follow. It wasn’t a pleasant experience for anyone so we allowed her to keep it longer than we should have.

That being said, we are officially a pacifier-free home (thanks in part to the fact that our now 6-month old never took one in the first place – thank goodness!!!).  In attempts to offer some inspiration to those of you who think it can never be done, here are my tips on how to wean your toddler off their ever-beloved pacifier.

It may seem impossible now, but it can be done!

Tip #1 :: Make sure YOU are ready and committed

Our first mistake was thinking we could wean Abigail off her pacifier because other people thought we should.  Just like everything else in life and in parenting, you need to make decisions based on what is best for you and your family (and not what other people think). In order for this to be a successful experience, you (the parents) need to come together and decide that it’s time.

At the end of the day, we made the decision to wean Abigail because we were sick of seeing her smile through her binky and we were tired of listening to muffled words that were a result of her binky usage.  Coincidentally enough, we came to that realization the day before Abigail’s first dentist appointment (where the dentist said pacifier usage should not occur after 18 months of age).  At that point, we really knew it was time and we were finally ready to commit to the change.

Tip #2 :: Come up with a plan you can stick to (and get creative)

This is extremely important. Once you’ve made the decision that you’re committed and ready to wean your toddler, come up with a clear and easy plan to follow. Make it a plan that works for your family.  For us (as detailed here), we were able to take her pacifier away one step at a time.  First, it was taken away at all times other than nap and night time. Then after coming up with a story of where we would send the pacifier (we went with the old trick of “sending it away to a family member”), it was taken away completely.

We came up with a plan and a timeline and we (for the most part) stuck with it. Always allow for a little flexibility in your plan (we’re dealing with kids, after all), but don’t think you’ll be able to do it without a clear path in mind.

If you’re going to tell a story like we did (“you’re a big girl now…you don’t need a pacifier anymore..we’re going to send your pacifier off to your younger cousin”), let them get involved in the process.  It’ll make it that much more believable for them. With Abigail, we let her decorate the package, put the pacifier in, and we had her put it in the mailbox.

When Abby saw that picture, her face lit up like it was Christmas morning.  The more believable the story, the easier the transition will be for your toddler (and it’s just more fun for everyone that way!).

Tip #3 :: Be prepared for withdrawals

This was the fun part (and yes, I’m being extremely sarcastic). Your toddler, especially if they love their pacifier half as much as Abby did, will go through some intense withdrawals. There will be kicking, screaming, hitting, flailing, and pretty much any other -ing word that drives you nuts about your kiddo.

All I can say is be prepared, pack your patience, and be ready to protect the other children in the house (which is what I did when Abigail would go into a flailing, uncontrollable tantrum – I had to make sure Mackenzie was out of the way, haha).

For us, the intense withdrawals only lasted one day. That one day felt like an eternity, but it could have been much worse.

Just set your expectations appropriately. Plan for the worst. Assume it will take weeks and then if you only deal with three days of withdrawals, it will feel like a minor miracle.

Tip #4 :: Follow through, even when you want to give in

There will be moments when all you want to do is dig through the trash and find the pacifier you tossed in the day before in an effort to enjoy some peace and quiet.  I urge you to stick to your guns and deal with the withdrawals and the screaming (and just pour yourself a large glass of wine or take a LONG bath at the end of the day – you’ll need it). If you give in, even if it’s for a few minutes, you’re erasing all the hard work you’ve already put in.

Instead of handing the pacifier over (or shoving it in your toddler’s mouth out of desperation), distract your toddler with another activity or treat they enjoy. We took extra trips to the park, we played legos for hours, and yes, I even took Abigail to get frozen yogurt one day in an effort to sufficiently distract her.  You do what you gotta do sometimes!

Tip #5 :: Give your kids more credit than you think they deserve

One of the most interesting things I think I learned from this experience is the fact that we as parents were more attached to Abigail’s pacifier than she was.

Since she was a month old we let her use it for soothing purposes, we used it as a noise minimizer, and as she got older we allowed her to grow more and more attached to it.

Because we had become so used to it, we were afraid that when we took it away, we’d experience meltdown after meltdown. We were afraid she’d never nap again. Never sleep again at night. Never last more than 5 minutes in the car or the stroller without screaming. The list goes on…

We were afraid.

And then when we started the process, we were blown away by how much Abigail understood and how easily she transitioned away from her pacifier. She understood what was going on. She understood that she sent her pacifier to her cousin because she “needed” it more than Abby did. She had a few rough moments in the beginning, but in the end, she was perfectly content with saying goodbye to her binky.

To this day I’m still shocked at how truly easy the transition was (especially when compared to our expectations of how it would go).

Tip #6 :: Just do it

Last but not least, just do it!  I sort of hate to quote Nike, but I’m going to do it anyway since it’s the best and simplest way I can encourage other parents to embark on this journey (if, as I said in my first tip, YOU are ready to say bye-bye to your toddler’s pacifier). 

There will never be a perfect time to do it. You’ll always be quick with an excuse to avoid the transition (some of our excuses sounded like this :: “we’re traveling this weekend…her molars are coming in…she’s just not ready yet…we need a few more nights of good sleep before we take it away…” Sound familiar???).  There will always be something holding you back.

So if you’re ready to see your toddler’s beautiful smile ALL the time and you’re ready for their words to make more sense, just do it. It may be rough for a few days, but once that pacifier is gone, you’ll feel like the weight of the world has been lifted off your shoulders (or at least that’s how I felt!).

You can do it!  And good luck!

7x7xMommy

Read our very detailed experience (Operation Binky Removal) here.

So the day is going along as our Thursdays typically do, filled with errands and doctor appointments.   There we are, the four of us,  driving to the doctor with husband and I in front seat and the two girls in the back.   We are running late for the doctor, we still have to stop to put gas in the car,  I haven’t had any caffeine yet this morning, and yet I feel like I’m doing okay.   I’m not stressed, I’m just enjoying the time together and looking for the day’s hidden treasures.   The 2-year-old is enjoying the novelty of having a baby next to her in the backseat.    Everything is good.   And then comes the crying.

In case you’re unfamiliar with the way one-month-old babies work (at least mine), they are predictable noise machines.  They drift into dreamy silence when the car’s in motion, and switch immediately to screaming-like-I’m-being-tortured mode whenever the car stops.  Or sometimes when it’s still going.  Because what’s the fun in being completely predictable, right?  But anyway, there’s a certain helplessness attached to a baby screaming in the car, and I don’t mean for the baby, I mean for me.   Because there I am in the front seat as the car speeds down the highway, baby in the back screaming like the world is ending, and I can’t do a thing about it.    When we stop for gas, I get out, walk around the car to put her pacifier back in, and she gets quiet.   So I return to the front, sit down, buckle up, and… she’s crying again.  But it’s no big deal because my husband is done pumping gas and the car’s moving again and she’s quiet…for a few moments.  And then she’s crying again.   And now we’re on the interstate.  So I ask the 2-year-old, “Can you put her paci back in?”   She tries, but she can’t reach it.   I unbuckle, saying a quick prayer that we won’t crash as I half-stand and lean into the backseat to give the baby her pacifier.   I sit back down, buckle up, and… she’s crying again.   She cries until we stop and I put her pacifier in, she’s quiet for a moment, then she spits it out and cries.   The car starts moving and she stops crying.  Until the stoplight.  And then she’s crying again.  I’m starting to get a little frustrated, but I take a breath and  turn back to see if I can reach the pacifier, and…

My 2-year-old is reaching over toward her sister.  ”It’s okay, baby,” she says.   She smiles at me.  ”I’m holding her hand,” she tells me.   And she is.   For a moment, my eyes see only that small, 5-inch section of the backseat, the section in which my two babies’ hands are entwined, their tiny fingers touching, and my daughter is leaning over to comfort her baby sister.  She isn’t bothered by the screaming.  She’s taking it in stride, even smiling, focused on speaking words of comfort.  ”It’s okay, bee bee bop bee boop boop,” she says in the squeaky voice she uses only for talking to babies.  ”It’s okay.”

And suddenly, it is.   It’s okay.  It’s okay that the baby is still screaming, that she spits out the pacifier no matter how many times I try to put it back in, and that the light we’re stopped at seems it will never end.  It’s okay that I can’t really hear anything anyone else is saying over the screams and that my husband’s attempts to “rock” the baby by easing on and off the brakes while stopped at the light are actually making me a bit dizzy.   It’s okay, because I’ve just witnessed something beautiful.  I’ve seen sister-love incarnate and it’s made everything else okay.  It’s all okay.

“Today’s the day!”

Oh my goodness. After weeks of allowing Abigail to use her binky at nap and nighttime, we’ve finally decided to yank it completely. What inspired us to do it?

The dentist.

We had Abigail’s first dentist appointment yesterday (the story of that “adventure” deserves its own post, trust me) and while the dentist said her teeth look great (go us!), he said it was beyond time to get rid of her binky completely.  I knew he would say that, but I think I just needed to hear it in person.

He said 18 months is the LONGEST a baby should have their binky. Whoops…

Thanks to the dentist appointment, I woke up this morning with a mission :: to help Abby say bye-bye completely to her binky. And while I’m sitting here an hour into Abby’s “nap” waiting to hear her quiet down (she’s not crying, thank goodness, she’s just playing with her toys and making a mess in her room), I’m proud to say the last binky has left the building.

While she was eating breakfast this morning, I explained to her what was going to happen…”you’re a big girl now…we’re going to send your last binky off to a baby who needs it because you don’t anymore (the funny part is that we’re sending it to her younger cousin, Emmy, who doesn’t even use binkies…haha)…we’re going to decorate the package and walk to the mailbox and drop it off…” Etc, etc, etc…and after that, we went about her normal morning and then spent time finding her binky, putting it in the envelope (Abby did it twice for good measure), and then she decorated it.  She was even generous enough to use ALL her flower stickers from Trader Joe’s. Check it out ::

Once she decided it was ready, we took Mac and headed down the stairs and off to the mailbox. It was a really fun adventure for Abby and I kept reminding her / asking her what we were doing. She seemed to understand it completely.

I suppose she looks a little skeptical, doesn’t she?

After dropping it into the mailbox, Abby was quickly distracted by a garbage truck (she’s obsessed) and we sat and watched the garbage man fiddle with garbage cans for a while. It was the perfect distraction.

A few hours later, it was nap time. Shockingly enough (haha, yeah right), she’d completely forgotten what we’d done with her binky. She crawled up in her bed and waited for it to magically show up. It never did.

I calmly and simply reminded her what we did in the morning and how cousin Emmy has it now (even though she lives in Atlanta and won’t have it for a few days…that is, if we even put enough postage on it…how terrible would it be if it all of a sudden showed back up at our door – haha). Once I explained everything, she completely understood but chose to resist her nap anyway.

She immediately decided she was hungry again, so we went into the kitchen and ate some more lunch. After that (around 12:45pm), I walked her back to her room and said it was time for her nap. She didn’t protest, but it’s been over an hour and she’s yet to sleep at all. She’s busy working on puzzles, talking to her stuffed animals, and doing other non-sleep related things (like turning her room into a complete and utter disaster, I’m sure).

You know what though? I’ll call it a success.

She’s not asking for her binky.

She’s not crying.

She’s not putting up a fight.

She just needs to figure out a new way to fall asleep without it and if that means she plays in her room for a while beforehand, that’s fine by me!

Yahoo…bye-bye binky!

4.17.13

Update…

So after yesterday’s weird nap (it took her 2.5 hours to go down and once she fell asleep, she only got an hour nap because I wanted to save bedtime), she barely even asked for it at night. Travis did the normal routine (bath, brushing teeth, books, milk, etc) and when he went to put her down for bed, she asked for it once. He reminded her that Emmy had it and after that, she literally went to sleep.

Honestly, it was like a miracle happened.

Somehow I feel like we were rewarded for sticking with a plan (finally).

Somehow it all of a sudden seemed like she’d never used a binky in her entire life.

Somehow Abby stopped using a binky.

It was almost too good to be true, but at nap time today she didn’t ask for it once. She simply curled up in her blankets and fell asleep for two and a half hours (I’m blessed with a great napper, thank goodness).

For a little bit of “icing on the cake,” if you will, a package arrived in the mail from Old Navy while she was sleeping and instead of telling her that it was from Mommy & Daddy, I gave Emmy all the credit. I told Abby that Emmy sent her the new clothes and her face lit up. It was the cutest thing. She was able to understand that as a thank you for the binky, Emmy sent her a new shirt (and a few other things).

When we went to the YMCA that afternoon, she told everyone about her new shirt and how it was from Emmy.

It’s amazing how kids process things.

Long, long, LONG story short, Abby is officially pacifier-less and she hasn’t been phased at all (we even had a babysitter last night who put her to bed on night #2 of no binky and apparently she was a piece of cake).

It just goes to show you that you need to do what’s best for you and your family and not worry so much about what everyone else thinks (it’s easy for me to say that now). We live in a crazy day and age where everyone compares themselves to everyone else and it’s just a big waste of time.  It’s unfair for us. And more importantly, it’s unfair for our kids. I’ve seen pictures of myself as a 2 or 3 year old with a pacifier in my mouth and I didn’t go off to college with one and I’m also pretty darn sure I turned out okay (right, Mom?).

That being said, I honestly think it was time for Abby to say bye-bye to her binky and she was such a big girl about it. We’re so proud of her and couldn’t possibly love her any more than we do.

For anyone who’s trying to say bye-bye to the binky, I’m going to do a “how-to” that’s much less long-winded than this series and I’m also going to write my final, final thoughts on the process.

Thanks for reading our long, crazy story!

7x7xMommy

Read all posts related to Operation Binky Removal here.

Booginhead.

Because I hadn’t seen a paci clip that fit the soothie (the only pacifier baby Dub will take) I just assumed there wasn’t one.  About a week or two ago Dub started throwing his pacifiers out of the crib only to be followed by a serious cry session in the middle of the night until we got one back to him.  He couldn’t see us give it back however, or there would be MAJOR bloody war screams so just imagine the middle of the night pitch-black acrobatics happening around here.  Not cool.

So, I decided to spend a little extra time in the hell hole that is Babies R Us and FIND one that fit.  (I actually made that decision after getting to the register with five packages of soothies, looking down and thinking “this is INSANE!”  If they can make fake grass to dry your bottles on, and even fake flowers with which to decorate the grass, somebody must know to make money off the soothie.  I immediately returned to the paci section where I had just cut another woman off by saying “Sorry, I like to spend as little time in here as possible.”  She was still there when I returned, and bless her heart, aided me in my search.

I’ll keep this short since the star of this show is the BOOGINHEAD.  Thank you wonderful person for making my dreams come true.

The pacifier within finding proximity.

Multi-tasking baby keeping tabs on his current obsession (Thor) whilst finding his paci.

Still keeping tabs, moving closer to pacified.

Workin’ it out.

Boom.  My life is amazing.

Gotta go put this baby down for a 30 minute nap, since that’s all he will take during the day these days.  I’m learning that there is probably always going to be something, and I’m okay with that, cause DAMN I love my baby.

Peace.

Speaking of the little things, I am certain I have found the key to endless fame and fortune. Unfortunately I am not smart enough to solve this puzzle myself so I put it out to the world. For the man, woman or persons with the time or inclination to do so riches await anyone who can figure out a device, mechanism, contraption or product that will safely keep a pacifier or “binky” in an infants mouth in a way that does not allow it or prevents it from falling out every 3 seconds so that I have to pick it up while they scream, put it back in and repeat the same process 45 times. The key to everlasting happiness and the sanity of countless other parent hostages around the world.

Someone suggested that I share on this blog the two posts that inspired the ongoing account of our time in prison camp. Below are those accounts…The short scribblings of a desperate man at a desperate time…

Yesterday the birdman discovered that he has a permanent Binky attached to his body at all times. Win, win.

“Day 33…no real sleep for days…they taunt me by sleeping in shifts…1:29am…only they know what will happen to me…this is the face of one of the hostage takers guarding us now…”

“Day 89….10:49pm…the hostage takers are clever, more so than I’d imagined. They’re newest tactic is screaming at us until they turn red or momentarily stop breathing…the screaming has been non-stop for two whole days now. It appears the male terrorist is prematurely teething. I don’t know how much longer we have mentally. These are some recent photos we took of our captors. One appears to be sleeping to gear up for the night shift…”

And that’s how it started. Two simple cries for help to my FaceBook network of friends and family and here we are. Madge and Bird would love you to click “Follow” above so you can keep tabs of the game of cat and mouse that is parenting. They would also love you to click “Like” on this page if you do. If you don’t, they are perfectly fine with you clicking “Like” regardless so their online presence increases and bolsters their ever growing self-esteem. Madge and Bird are also looking forward to any comments their adoring public might have in response to their father’s silly cries for help.

The Philips AVENT Freeflow pacifier offers a durable soothing solution for infants up to six months old. Nipples are made of odor-free silicone, which is easy to sterilize and resists becoming sticky or misshapen. The special shape of these BPA Free pacifiers allows for healthy development of a baby’s palate, teeth, and gums.

Promotes Orthodontic Health
The collapsible nipple works with the natural development of a baby’s teeth and gums. The nipple is flat and drop-shaped, respecting the shape of your baby’s palate even when the pacifier is positioned upside down in the mouth.

Durable, Taste-Free Silicone
The Freeflow pacifier is made of durable silicone. Silicone is taste and odor free, so your baby is less likely to reject it. Silicone nipples are strong and resist becoming sticky, discolored, or misshapen.

Secure Ring Handle for Quick Retrieval
The pacifier features a security ring, allowing for quick retrieval or removal and making it easy for your baby to grasp. Six holes in the pacifier cap allow for greater airflow, reducing the possibility of irritation on your baby’s face. The Freeflow pacifier is BPA free.

Easy to Sterilize
Sterilizing these pacifiers is simple–put them in a Philips AVENT steam sterilizer or boil for five minutes. Philips AVENT pacifiers and their caps are also dishwasher safe. Add one of the included snap-on caps after cleaning to keep the pacifier sterile until it’s needed.

My Review:
Pros:

• The shape of the pacifier doesn’t interfere with baby’s breathing
• Translucent clear colour makes it easy to clean and spot dirt
• Has a snap-on protective cap which is great for hygiene purposes
• Easy to put and take out from baby’s mouth

• The nipple is not that fantastic

Overall: This is the first pacifier that Baby yo used. However, he is not the pacifier type and more of a finger-sucking type. It was together in a set that came with the sterilizer which was given to me. He used it here and there when he liked it but it was good that he wasn’t attached to it much because it maybe a bad habit when he grows older. He used it more to fall asleep rather than “sucking purposes”. At the end, he didn’t care much for it after a month or so. 

• Check Latest Price
• Compare with other Pacifiers

Related Links
Gene Simmons Tongue, Customer Reviews

Madge and Bird doing their famous “syncronized flying baby routine”

The hostage takers did some of their finest work to date today. Today’s tactic was a clever one. No naps for either of them, all day. They elected sleep deprivation in order to achieve a new and heightened level of screaming to ensure we knew they were still running the show. Their mission was a success. Yesterday my fellow hostage and I felt like our captors were lenient, almost like they didn’t have the heart to torture us. Today, we are reminded that it is their world and we are simply living in it.  Today we are reminded that they are Godzilla and we are Japan. Well played Madge. Well played, birdman. Unfortunately for my wife and I, we are victims of what is known as “Stockholm Syndrome.” Stockholm syndrome, or capture–bonding, is a psychological phenomenon in which hostages express empathy and sympathy and have positive feelings toward their captors, sometimes to the point of defending them. These feelings are generally considered irrational in light of the danger or risk endured by the victims, who essentially mistake a lack of abuse from their captors for an act of kindness. We have fallen in love with our hostage takers. Another part of their plan, no doubt. If we are to survive we are going to have to step up our game and want it more. Most of my life energy has been drained by waking up every two hours for months to feed the terrorists, but I may just have some juice left in the tank. What doesn’t help are things that mount up against you like for example I now know my year old, 7 pound little white Maltese dog has joined the hostage takers against us. I know that because every single day without fail that little white dog steals and chews to oblivion no less than 2 pacifiers. Those are the same binkys that we have been using successfully to negotiate with the terrorists. I have asked that little white dog repeatedly not to continue to obliterate the binkys but still she persists. Why put the binkys where the little white dog can get them you ask? Perhaps because my mind is so decimated by sleep deprivation, behavioral conditioning, screams and cries, work, bills, pot and 18 years of Diabetes that there’s simply not one God damned brain cell left that I can afford to dedicate to stopping these binkys from falling into the wrong paws. Or maybe I’m just a glutton for punishment. Either way, the hostages have decided we can go to sleep now, so we’re going to jump all over that like my little white dog on a pacifier. I have about enough energy left to click publish, so for now I say “Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night”.

At 41 weeks, Jacob and I started doing everything, literally EVERYTHING, to induce my labor. From eating spicy food, going on bumpy rides every single day, walking until my feet felt like they would fall off (BTW I didn’t swell during my entire pregnancy because I drank plenty of water), doing the dirty, acupressure, massages, bananas, yoga, stripping my membranes (twice!), whatever you can think of, we did it, and NOTHING WORKED. So my conclusion on inducing labor based on my personal experience is that nothing can induce labor, your baby comes whenever he/she decides to come.

I was scheduled to be induced Monday morning, and as much as I was opting not to be induced, I was going to let them because one, it would be safer for the baby not to exceed 42 weeks in utero, and two I would be more than ready at that point for Natalia to be here. Fortunately my water finally broke the Friday afternoon prior to my induction date. At first I wasn’t sure if it broke or not, so I asked my mom what it felt like. She said it feels like you’re uncontrollably peeing on yourself. Soon after that, about 15 minutes, I was confirmed of my water breaking because liquid started pouring out, lol. I didn’t call the Doctor nor did I go to the hospital. I waited until I started having contractions 5-10 apart for an hour like my doctors instructed, which didn’t happen until 18 hours later. Bad idea for me to not go in right away because of the risk of infection, but how was I supposed to know? This is my first time having a baby, and BOTH of my GYN’s told me not to come in until I started having contractions. There was no mention of my water breaking. And since I’m totally healthy, I didn’t think there was any reason for me or my baby to develop an “infection”. According to what I researched, the vaginal exams are what cause infections in the first place, which makes complete sense to me.

So the next morning around 6am I started having mild contractions, then they increased in pain and decreased in time apart, so by 8 am Jacob and I were on our way to the hospital. When we got there the nurses asked me if my water broke & I told them yes it did, yesterday afternoon. They all looked at me like I was crazy and asked why I waited so long to come in. I told them that I didn’t feel the need to come in because everything seemed fine and that my Doctor told me not to come in until I was having contractions, so I was simply following instructions. Well, when they started my IV they told me they were going to start me on antibiotics. In shock I asked “for what?” And the nurse said “the GBS that you’re positive for”. I was in total disbelief and said “excuse me, but what in the world are you talking about?” She explained to me that I was positive for Group B Strep, (the test they give you when you’re 36 weeks) and that the baby has been swimming in infected amniotic fluid for the entire time since my water broke. GBS (Group B Strep) is a bacteria that is carried by both men and women, that does not affect adults but can be very harmful for unborn babies, which is why pregnant women ate tested for it at 36 weeks. Men will never know if they have it or not because they will never be tested for it since they obviously can’t get pregnant. Well when I took the test, nothing was ever mentioned about it after that, so I assumed I was negative. I would expect a Doctor to tell you the results of your tests, ESPECIALLY if you’re positive for it, don’t you?! So yeah, I was carrying this infection and had no idea about it. I was infuriated by this new found information because now my baby is at risk. If I would’ve known about this infection, I would’ve been at the hospital the day before when my water broke.

Anyways, once your water breaks you have 24 hours to get the baby out or it can become something serious. So I had 6 hours to deliver my daughter and I was only 2 cm dilated (and have been for two weeks!). They started me on pitocin right away. 2 hours later they checked my cervix to find that I was still only 2 cm dilated, so a c-section was the final decision. At first I wanted to cry because I felt cheated out of my wanting for a natural delivery since I was never informed about this infection that could be potentially fatal to my unborn daughter. I also was not so phsyched about having such a dramatic surgery, especially since I’ve never had surgery of any kind. I asked the nurses if they had c-sections and even asked if I could see their scars because I also wasn’t very excited about having such a large scar on my belly. One of the young nurses showed me not her scar because it was so low, but pulled her shirt up just to show me that the scar was below her panty line. I couldn’t even see it! And she was so skinny you wouldn’t even be able to tell that she had a baby, and she had 2! So that made me feel A LOT better about it. So on we went with the procedure.

They had me fill out all kinds of forms and explained to Jacob and I what would be happening. He had to change into scrubs so he could be there with me while the doctors carried me into the operation room so they could numb me from the waist down. They gave me a spinal anesthetic that literally took 5 seconds to kick in. I felt a rush of a numbing sensation that actually felt really good, lol! I felt very shaky though shortly afterwards which I didn’t like too much. Also, the shot they gave me was a MUCH smaller needle than that of the epidural, which I was very happy about because that was the very reason I had decided I wasn’t going to have an epidural if this would’ve happened naturally.

They cut me open and tugged, pushed and pulled (which I could feel a lot of although it didn’t hurt, it was just a lot of pressure) and then out came the baby, 7lbs. and 14oz. of her. About a minute later I heard her first cry and was in tears at the amazing sound that I had waited 9 long months to hear. Jacob cried with me and we were both very happy. However, because she was infected, they took her from us right away. I got to see her and kiss her cheek before she left and dad asked to see her hair because she was wearing a cap. When they took it off, we were amazed to see a head full of dark hair, just like I dreamed about!

So they took me to the recovery room while we waited to hear from the doctor’s what was going on with Natalia. Now there are a lot of details to what was happening between the surgery and the end, so I’m just going to make the long story short: The doctors were concerned about her breathing patterns. They ran blood tests and white blood cell tests which came back triple the amount of what was normal, meaning that her body was already building white blood cells to fight off whatever infection she had. They were also concerned about some “seizure-like episodes” that she was supposedly having which made the nurses decide to transfer her to Wolfson Children’s Hospital in Jacksonville because they were a small town hospital that did not have all the tools needed to run the tests they wanted her to have. They weren’t sure what she was doing because she’s a  newborn, hence their wanting to run tests just to make sure she was acting normal. I was completely devastated because the doctors made it seem like she was having all these problems, they even mentioned a possibility of meningitis. I cried so hard and asked “what are they going to do to my baby?!” Jacob tried his hardest to keep his composure because I was so upset about everything and then he broke down and started crying with me.

Natalia went through so much in the first days of her life in the outside world. She IV’s since she was born, she had all kinds of tests run on her, she had MRI’s she had her spine tapped, all kinds of bullshit. I know that they were just trying to be on the safe side, but what new mom wants to see her first baby go through all this trauma?! Anyways, in the end Natalia was completely fine. They ran all these tests just to find nothing wrong with her. She just had an infection and the antibiotics they started me on before the surgery killed it just in time. So we went through all this heartache for nothing. It was very crazy. We ended up being in the hospital for 5 days before finally bringing her home.I was in the hospital for 3 days recovering from the surgery. They transferred Natalia on my second day of recovery so I couldn’t even go to the hospital to be with my baby until the next day. Jacob had to drive from Lake City to Jacksonville, back to Lake City to pick me up, back to Jacksonville so we could be at the hospital every day and then finally back to Lake City so we could come home, and then he had to drive back so he could go home, lol! Lots and lots of driving.

At the end of the day, there were a lot of lessons learned from this entire experience. Although it was scary, it was very worth it and I am happy to say that I am a new mom to a very happy and healthy baby girl. According to her pediatrician she eats better than the average baby for her size and is growing at a great rate. She is such a good baby, hardly ever cries unless she needs something. She is always very content and has such a well-developed personality already. She’s definitely mommy and daddy’s little diva girl!

I also would like to mention that my perspective about c-sections have dramatically changed since I underwent the surgery. I actually prefer to have the c-section because I didn’t have to feel any pain WHATSOEVER, everything went by so quick it was unbelievable. The entire procedure took a total of 55 minutes. No contractions, no pain, GREAT pain meds during and afterwards lol, and my little girls head did not get squished and my vagina didn’t rip! The scar is barely noticeable, looks like a pen line just below my bikini line and nobody will ever be able to see it unless I show them, which means I can still wear my bikini this summer! Best of all, this entire event brought me and Jacob closer together and he loves me more now than ever before since having to be there with me and watching me go through all of this craziness. I definitely want to share my story because I think it’s well worth mentioning to people. Always prepare for the worst because you never know what’s going to happen, and always be optimistic about negative things that you have no control over because they are not always as bad as they seem.

Today my baby girl is 2 weeks and 3 days old and she is making the cutest “ooh” and “ahh” sounds, she picks her head up all by herself to look around because she wants to see everything, she will NOT fall asleep without being held, so she’s already spoiled, lol! (Thanks Jacob!)

One more thing I want to add before I conclude my super long birth story; because Natalia was taken from me right from the beginning, we didn’t get to experience the first bonding of mother and baby to establish breastfeeding, which is essential! And I am completely against giving my baby formula for several reasons. One because I’m pro-natural, two because I don’t feel that formula gives babies everything they need like breast milk does, three because of all the side effects that come from formula fed babies that I’ve researched, such as being more prone to obesity and becoming sick with diseases, and four because although the formula feeds the baby for longer periods of time (formula fed babies eat 6-10 times a day vs. breastfed babies eat 8-12 times a day) which means the formula “sits” in their stomachs and that just reminds me of McDonald’s food which is totally gross in my opinion. I already decided I wanted to breastfeed exclusively. Well since I didn’t get to breastfeed for the first week, I didn’t establish a good milk supply, so I couldn’t produce enough milk to feed my baby. Not only that but the doctors shoved bottles and pacifiers in my newborn baby’s mouth which pissed me the **** off! If they needed to syringe feed her then okay, but I was not about the pacifiers or bottles because of nipple confusion. So Natalia had a difficult time latching on for the first week and a half of our being together. It was making me sore and I was to the point where I was about to just give up all together. But then I decided “screw that!” I’m not going to give up because I WANT this for my baby, so I’m going to MAKE SURE it happens, no matter what it takes. If I have to breastfeed her every half hour then so be it. I consulted with a lactation specialist who was so inspired by my determination and told me that that’s what it takes, you have to really want to breastfeed for it to work out, which is what I truly want, exclusively. I only will use formula if I have to supplement, but otherwise I want to strictly breastfeed my baby mostly because it’s the healthiest for her, but also because it does establish a bonding relationship with you and your baby that just feels like pure love, and I want that with me and Natalia. So I have a $700 hospital grade breast pump that I’m using FOR FREE for a week-2 weeks just because my lactation specialist wants to help me because she sees how bad I want this. Unfortunately Natalia and I had a rough start, but now that things are back to normal we are going to work this out to both of our benefits. My advice to anybody else out there with this problem is to never give up on the things that you truly want. I am proud to say that Natalia has gotten MUCH better about latching on (although she still needs some improvement) and I am finally being able to produce enough milk to catch up with her needs. (:

Bringing Natalia Home <3

Natalia & I Now (: