My life has become extremely busy of late – trying to balance working for money, studying for my teaching qualification, teaching and preparing for teaching, as well as normal life things. Its been a big change for me from nine months of working a couple of days a week.

I have a tendancy to getting myself into an extremley stressed state, which can develop into depression if I am not careful.

So, I have decided to step back and cut down. I have loved reading blogs – all sorts – green, crafty, feminist, pagan and everything in between. But recently my RSS feeder has been a source of stress for me – it had 6 subject tabs with loads of blogs on each, making me feel guilty for not reading them all. So I have cut them down – to just a few which I read now and even then not every day. It has been strangely freeing to do so.

I have also stepped back from making all of the Christmas presents I had planned to do. I realise from a green or frugal perspective this is not great, but I just cannot do it all and I have to look after myself. Next year, I will make presents in my summer holidays!

Although I have high ideological stadards I would like to attain I have to realise that I am only human and I cannot do everything at once. I cannot compare myself to people who are retired, or have children, live in America or Australia with huge grounds, or have a different life to me. We are all in our own place and we have to make the choices which are right for us right now.

Being Pagan isn’t about escapism, it is about being part of the world which surrounds us and interacting with it in reality. For me, this means being true to myself, including admitting that I have limitations, and sometimes I have to step back and cut down in order for me to remain my best.

Șoricelul pedala din toate cele patru lăbuțe încercând disperat să nu se lase purtat de râul care venea în cascadă peste el și să se prindă de grunjii de pământ ud ce se desprindeau din peretele găurii. Blana-i era ciuciulită și udă, urechile înfundate, iar mișcările-i deveniră tot mai molcome și mai dezlânate. Se cufundă într-un întuneric de smoală și gândurile încetară. Alunecă dus de șuvoi, mai mult mort decât viu. Lichidul săpase și deschisese o galerie prin care se rostogolea spre adâncurile pământului această vietate mică, în stare de inconștiență. Ajuns într-un spațiu mai larg se izbi de pardonseală și un firicel rubiniu îi izvorî din botic. Auzi niște pași apăsați apropiindu-se de el. O matahală căreia-i vedea doar coada spelbă, fără fir de păr, se apropiase de el. De spaimă, își reveni din leșin.

- Ți-am zis să nu mai bei ca porcul. Uite, te-ai pișat tot pe tine. Puți tot a pișat. Cred că te-ai și căcat. Spurcăciunea dracului ce ești! În loc să-ți bagi capul într-o găleată cu apă rece, cum ți-am zis, ți l-ai băgat într-o găleată cu wiskey. Ridica-te și curăță aici! Că doar n-o să curețe colega mea…

- Nu m-am pișat pe mine… bâigui șoricelul cu ochii ieșiți din orbite de groază. S-a pișat Motanul Felix. M-am ascuns de el și …

- A, deci e și Felix aici. Fe-liiix!!! strigă guzganul cu blană rozalie pe care Traian, adunându-se de jos și scuturându-și blănița, îl putea admira acum în toată splendoarea. Hai, coboară că ne-ntâlnim la Grivco!!! Sau la Athene Pallace, unde vrei?

- La Grivco ne-ntâlnim, veni răspusul tunător multiplicat de ecourile galeriei. 

”Deci se întâlnesc la Grivco ca să mă piardă pe mine!” își zise șoricelul chițăind de mulțumire că e șoricel și se va putea strecura acolo, între Mai-Mari, să-i audă ce vorbesc. Se trase binișor într-o parte dând să se facă nevăzut.

- Unde pleci, dragule? se pisici o soricuță blondă, apărută nu se știe de unde, înveșmântată într-o rochie Coco Chanel, și împestrițată de bijuterii, brățări, cercei cu cristale Swarovski.

Șoricelul încremeni din pricina surprizei.

- Tu??!… Aici?! … Cu guzganul rozaliu? Cu ăștia?…  Și … stai puțin …, se bălbâi el, de ce ești șoricioaică? Ai fost și tu la fotografia de grup?

- Nu, iubitule, dar nu știi că noi doi suntem empatici? Ce ți se-ntâmplă ție mi se-ntâmplă și mie. Nu pleca nicăieri, vei pierde partea cea mai interesantă…

- Și ce cauți tu cu ăsta? îi strecură șoptit, privind pieziș înspre guzganul care-și spăla cu lăbuțele blănița aruncând ocheade unui ciob de oglindă.

- Băi pârlitule! Nu destul că te-am suportat atâția ani?! Nu destul că ai vândut pirogile și ți-ai pus galbenii la teșcherea fără să-i împarți cu nimeni? ‘Tu-ți răscrucea și anghinarea mă-tii de bețiv! Guzganul înhățase o bâtă de base-ball și-i trase una cu sete în căpățână.

- L-ai omorât! se tângui șoricica.

- L-am omorât pe pustia… Ăsta nu-i mort. Hai să-l scoatem afară că până ne-ntoarcem, se descompune aici și ne-mpute palatul!

Cei doi îl aburcară fiecare de câte două labuțe, îl scoaseră printr-o galerie laterală care dădea în câmp și-l aruncară cât colo, în iarba uscată, sub soarele arzător.

- Nu-l îngropăm?, însistă, oarecum înduioșată, șoricica.

- Să-l îngroape gaia! Eu? Poate vrei să-i punem și cruce lu’ păgânu’ ăsta! Hai, că-ntârziem la-ntâlnire!

Cei doi își scuturară blănițele, se dădură de trei ori de-a berbeleacul și se transformară în două ființe umane care ieșeau din câmpul de la marginea orașului, își curățară încălțările de noroi și urcară în limuzinele care-i așteptau la marginea șoselei.

- M-au părăsit toți… gemu șoricelul, venindu-și în simțiri și căutând din ochi o frunză mai mare, să se tragă la umbră din calea soarelui de amiază care-i împungea cu un miliard de săgeți capul ce devenise o rană vie. M-au vândut și m-au trădat și m-au părăsit… izbucni el în lacrimi. E Holocaustul! Uuuu! U-u-u-u! Î-hî, î-hî, î-hî! izbucni în hohote de neputință și disperare. Lacrimile se uscau ca niște pete albicioase la colțurile ochilor. Ar fi vrut să fi murit, să nu simtă această durere teribilă care-i sfâșia măruntaiele. Sunt pierdu-u-ut! Doamne! Salvează-mă! urlă el căutând cu ochii în zarea cerului sclipitor ca o folie de aluminiu. Nu mă lasa să pier aici, neștiut de nimeni! Î-hî, î-hî, î-hî! urlă șoricelul la un Dumnezeu care nu catadicsea să-i răspundă. Doar o boare răcoroasă adie ușor mișcând vârfurile ierburilor.

- Dă-mi un semn că exiști! Vreau să pun mâna și să urlu: Este! Te rooog! Doamne Dumnezeule, știu că nu mă crezi! Că mint așa cum respir! Dar acum… Te rog, dă-mi un semn!  Arată-mi calea mea și îți voi respecta întru totul dorința! U-hu-u-hu-u-hu! se smiorcăi șoricelul halucinând deja din cauza arșiței.

În tăriile cerului de sineală se rotea în spirale înalte un șoim imperial.  Ochii lui scormonitori, rotunzi și magici urmăreau orice mișcare, oricât de imperceptibilă. Își strânse cercurile din ce în ce, apoi coborî ca o săgeată și-l apucă cu ghearele ca niște cange pe micuțul șoricel. Țâșni cu el înapoi în cer. Îl purtă peste oraș, apoi peste munții cu creste înzăpezite, peste câmpurile pârloagă de ani buni. Peste ruinele fostelor uzine, fabrici, șantiere, de unde fiarele ruginite se ridicau acuzator ca niște brațe descărnate. Peste cursurile de apă, pline de peturi și nailoane. Peste pădurile din care rămăseseră doar la șosea pâlcuri de copaci, în adânc fiind decupată de fierăstraiele electrice.

- Vezi? Ia aminte, rosti, scurt Șoimul.

- Și pe tine te-a transformat fotograful acela vrăjitor? Ce mă bucur că nu sunt singurul batjocorit!…exclamă șoricelul care pân-aici tăcuse cu moartea în suflet.

- Eu șamanizez din când în când, măi dragă Traian. Acum mă duceam la o-ntâlnire la Grivco și te-am văzut pe câmp. Ai fi murit acolo. E păcat, totuși. Dumnezeu nu vrea moartea păcătosului ci îndreptarea lui… mai rosti șoimul cu tonalitatea lui guturală inconfundabilă.

- Mă iei și pe mine la Grivco? strigă, plin de speranța reînsuflețită, șoricelul.

-  Nu ai zis că vrei să-ți afli calea? Parcă așa am auzit… îi răspunse, cu o nuanță de ironie indecelabilă, șoimul, prinvindu-l cu ochii lui rotunzi și hipnotici.

- Păi tu nu ești Dumnezeu! Nici nu crezi în el! strigă șoricelul, răgușit de spaimă, realizând brusc cine-l înhățase în gheare.

- Ei, e un fel de a spune… La nivel conștient, da, pot să spun că susțin că sunt ateu. Dar, în interioritatea mea, sunt un om profund religios. Hai c-am ajuns. Mă grăbesc să nu întârzii că nu se face… Deși, pe mine mă așteaptă cu toții.

Șoimul coborî respectând traiectoria acelorași cercuri perfect concentrice și-i dădu drumul șoricelului Traian la marginea unei haldine de gunoi.

In the Bullshit Department, a businessman can’t hold a candle to a clergyman. ‘Cause I gotta tell you the truth, folks. When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. No contest. No contest. Religion. Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Think about it. Religion has actually convinced people that there’s an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever ’til the end of time!

But He loves you. He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He’s all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can’t handle money! Religion takes in billions of dollars, they pay no taxes, and they always need a little more. Now, you talk about a good bullshit story. Holy Shit!

But I want you to know something, this is sincere, I want you to know, when it comes to believing in God, I really tried. I really, really tried. I tried to believe that there is a God, who created each of us in His own image and likeness, loves us very much, and keeps a close eye on things. I really tried to believe that, but I gotta tell you, the longer you live, the more you look around, the more you realize, something is fucked up.

Something is wrong here. War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, torture, crime, corruption, and the Ice Capades. Something is definitely wrong. This is not good work. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. Results like these do not belong on the resume of a Supreme Being. This is the kind of shit you’d expect from an office temp with a bad attitude. And just between you and me, in any decently-run universe, this guy would’ve been out on his all-powerful ass a long time ago. And by the way, I say “this guy”, because I firmly believe, looking at these results, that if there is a God, it has to be a man.

No woman could or would ever fuck things up like this. So, if there is a God, I think most reasonable people might agree that he’s at least incompetent, and maybe, just maybe, doesn’t give a shit. Doesn’t give a shit, which I admire in a person, and which would explain a lot of these bad results.

So rather than be just another mindless religious robot, mindlessly and aimlessly and blindly believing that all of this is in the hands of some spooky incompetent father figure who doesn’t give a shit, I decided to look around for something else to worship. Something I could really count on.

And immediately, I thought of the sun. Happened like that. Overnight I became a sun-worshipper. Well, not overnight, you can’t see the sun at night. But first thing the next morning, I became a sun-worshipper. Several reasons. First of all, I can see the sun, okay? Unlike some other gods I could mention, I can actually see the sun. I’m big on that. If I can see something, I don’t know, it kind of helps the credibility along, you know? So everyday I can see the sun, as it gives me everything I need; heat, light, food, flowers in the park, reflections on the lake, an occasional skin cancer, but hey. At least there are no crucifixions, and we’re not setting people on fire simply because they don’t agree with us.

Sun worship is fairly simple. There’s no mystery, no miracles, no pageantry, no one asks for money, there are no songs to learn, and we don’t have a special building where we all gather once a week to compare clothing. And the best thing about the sun, it never tells me I’m unworthy. Doesn’t tell me I’m a bad person who needs to be saved. Hasn’t said an unkind word. Treats me fine. So, I worship the sun. But, I don’t pray to the sun. Know why? I wouldn’t presume on our friendship. It’s not polite.

I’ve often thought people treat God rather rudely, don’t you? Asking trillions and trillions of prayers every day. Asking and pleading and begging for favors. Do this, gimme that, I need a new car, I want a better job. And most of this praying takes place on Sunday His day off. It’s not nice. And it’s no way to treat a friend.

But people do pray, and they pray for a lot of different things, you know, your sister needs an operation on her crotch, your brother was arrested for defecating in a mall. But most of all, you’d really like to fuck that hot little redhead down at the convenience store. You know, the one with the eyepatch and the clubfoot? Can you pray for that? I think you’d have to. And I say, fine. Pray for anything you want. Pray for anything, but what about the Divine Plan?

Remember that? The Divine Plan. Long time ago, God made a Divine Plan. Gave it a lot of thought, decided it was a good plan, put it into practice. And for billions and billions of years, the Divine Plan has been doing just fine. Now, you come along, and pray for something. Well suppose the thing you want isn’t in God’s Divine Plan? What do you want Him to do? Change His plan? Just for you? Doesn’t it seem a little arrogant? It’s a Divine Plan. What’s the use of being God if every run-down shmuck with a two-dollar prayerbook can come along and fuck up Your Plan?

And here’s something else, another problem you might have: Suppose your prayers aren’t answered. What do you say? “Well, it’s God’s will.” “Thy Will Be Done.” Fine, but if it’s God’s will, and He’s going to do what He wants to anyway, why the fuck bother praying in the first place? Seems like a big waste of time to me! Couldn’t you just skip the praying part and go right to His Will? It’s all very confusing.

So to get around a lot of this, I decided to worship the sun. But, as I said, I don’t pray to the sun. You know who I pray to? Joe Pesci. Two reasons: First of all, I think he’s a good actor, okay? To me, that counts. Second, he looks like a guy who can get things done. Joe Pesci doesn’t fuck around. In fact, Joe Pesci came through on a couple of things that God was having trouble with.

For years I asked God to do something about my noisy neighbor with the barking dog, Joe Pesci straightened that cocksucker out with one visit. It’s amazing what you can accomplish with a simple baseball bat.

So I’ve been praying to Joe for about a year now. And I noticed something. I noticed that all the prayers I used to offer to God, and all the prayers I now offer to Joe Pesci, are being answered at about the same 50% rate. Half the time I get what I want, half the time I don’t. Same as God, 50-50. Same as the four-leaf clover and the horseshoe, the wishing well and the rabbit’s foot, same as the Mojo Man, same as the Voodoo Lady who tells you your fortune by squeezing the goat’s testicles, it’s all the same: 50-50. So just pick your superstition, sit back, make a wish, and enjoy yourself.

And for those of you who look to The Bible for moral lessons and literary qualities, I might suggest a couple of other stories for you. You might want to look at the Three Little Pigs, that’s a good one. Has a nice happy ending, I’m sure you’ll like that. Then there’s Little Red Riding Hood, although it does have that X-rated part where the Big Bad Wolf actually eats the grandmother. Which I didn’t care for, by the way.

And finally, I’ve always drawn a great deal of moral comfort from Humpty Dumpty. The part I like the best? “All the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty back together again.” That’s because there is no Humpty Dumpty, and there is no God. None, not one, no God, never was. In fact, I’m gonna put it this way. If there is a God, may he strike this audience dead! See? Nothing happened. Nothing happened? Everybody’s okay? All right, tell you what, I’ll raise the stakes a little bit. If there is a God, may he strike me dead. See? Nothing happened, oh, wait, I’ve got a little cramp in my leg. And my balls hurt. Plus, I’m blind. I’m blind, oh, now I’m okay again, must have been Joe Pesci, huh? God Bless Joe Pesci. Thank you all very much. Joe Bless You!

It’s been my dream for many years to start my own Pagan publication for my community. It seems like this is my path in life, as slow going as it is with as many false starts as I’ve encountered. I even managed to go to school for it.

It’s all a matter of time and effort, really. Unfortunately the two have yet to combine properly for the dream to actually launch. Northern Invocations Magazine was started, well the production end, anyway. A project this big is not a one person job and I had a team working with me. But life gets in the way for all of us, N.I. fell to the wayside unfortunately. Again, slow and steady process. Writing, editing, layout, design, art, distribution, subscription, advertising, sponsorshp, funding…it’s not easy.

My co-editor, co-conspirator, when Northern Invocations started, Crystal has formed an e-newsletter for the local pub moot she co-runs, Building Bridges. The aptly named Building Bridges Newsletter began as mostly a calendar of events for the local and surrounding areas. It soon grew to incorporate a masthead of staff (albeit a small one), articles, photography, and a rather strong following of thousands of hits a month. It didn’t take long before I decided to throw my efforts of N.I. in to B.B and combine the two so at least something would start getting out to readers. I mean, the readership is already there and Crystal has more connections to reach more people than I do. So…go with it.

The biggest difference really is the fact that I wanted to start in print so people would have something paper and substantial and material to hold on to. Unfortunately, printing costs far more than web hosting and with the Internet, you can reach more people. That’s why the e-newsletter is working the way it does. Besides, Crystal has stated that she’s looking forward to go into print very soon and that’s where I further step in.

Currently, I’m the Culture & Entertainment writer for the e-newsletter. My first article, a review of the Dragon Ritual Drummers‘ CD release party for Tribal Magik at the Hammertown (Hamilton) Pagan Pub Moot last month appeared in this month’s edition.  (Scroll down to page 4)

This will be the predominant focus of my writing and editing for the next foreseeable future, it’s a step in the right direction of being the Pagan journalist I’ve set out to be. For more, don’t forget to subscribe to the Building Bridges Newsletter by e-mail (check the website for more information) or through Facebook. I’ll also be posting the link to the newsletter here.

Happy reading.

… The Witch of the Forest Grove called 101 Syndrome. Please read her entry first before carrying on here so what I will write makes sense to you.

I hold my hand up high and admit that I am one of those people trapped or surrounded by 101 books knowing fully well that they don’t get me were I want to go. Did you read the part where I said: were I want to go???? I don’t see a problem with 101 books if that is what fulfills your spiritual path and need. End off! For me, I have been running in circles for quite some time, but still carry on buying 101 books hoping for the next step on my path which never comes. Somehow staying in my comfort zone instead of broadening my horizon by venturing into the deep.    

The funny thing is that I have got two of the books mentioned on Sarah’s list for quite sometime, but I am honest to say that I have not read them yet. The Golden Bough fell into my hand a couple of months ago when I went to our local library. I am waiting for the White Goddess to be returned, but so far no luck. When looking around I found the Golden Bough in th same area, grabbed it and what do you know, it is a withdrawal that I can keep. Woo Hoo! Since then it is standing on my shelf gathering dust. Well, like so many others, but their time will come.

Quick nod to the new Tyr ablum: By the Light of the Northern Star.  The title is an overt reference for those in the know, the northern star was a representation of TYR to our ancestors – holding the path of the heavens true. 

This album is pure pagan metal.  I wouldn’t call it pagan/folk, because while it does have honest lyrics about heritage and myth, it does not include too many folk instruments or arrangements.

But if your a heathen and like metal, which seems pretty normal for pagans of the Norse stripe, this album is bold and it will penetrate you with pagan pride.

The first track “Hold Your Heathen Hammer High” nearly makes my heart explode.

“Hold the heathen hammer high with a battle cry
For the pagan past I live and one day will die
Hold the heathen hammer high, never turn away
Ever true unto your forefathers stalwart stay”

I’ve gotta tell you I like these guys as well.  I recently caught an interview with Singer Pól Arni Holm and I gotta say he seems like a guy that truly lives what he says.  He wore a hammer proudly, yet not arrogantly, he spoke of the myths he was currently reading and seemed like a normal dude…like many of us pagans are.

I think it’s incredible how pagan metal has become in recent years it’s own genre.  I’ve gotta say, as one who has loved so much black metal and pagan metal in the past, it’s awesome to see it become more pronounced and less subtle in it’s focus.

Other Pagan Metal bands I’d recommend:

Elvenking,Falconer, Mithotyn,Borknagar,Korpiklaani,Finntroll, Suidakra, Eluveitie

Nighttime rituals are important for kids and adults.  They prepare the mind for sleep and ease the transition from wakefulness to rest.

My kids say a nightly prayer.  It helps them slow down and avoid bad dreams.  It’s really simple and changes every night.  They ask for and give thanks for three specific things that they can go to sleep thinking about.  Things that make them feel safe, heard and close to the goddess or deity of choice.

Goddess Good and Goddess Great thank you for: (1)(2)(3)
Goddess Good and Goddess Great bless me with: (1)(2)(3)
So mote it be!
You can, of course, change this to a specific God or Goddess or protective spirit, angel, guide, Boon fairy companion, ancestor, or whomever you so desire.

You can spray a nightlight with three sprays of purifying salt water.  While spraying repeat a protective chant of your own own making.  Something like:

Little light
now cleansed and pure
protect me through the night.

A clipping of my hair under the pillow or sewn to teddy can be helpful too. Kids can take a piece of Mom to bed with them.  It’s comforting and very protective.

A sachet of lavender and violet with a pinch of poppy seeds under the pillow.  Lavender to calm and sooth, Violet to protect and poppy seeds for dreams.  The hope, with this sachet, is to produce calm, soothing, protective dreams.

Some lavender and/or violet incense.  Not for my son, specifically, becasue of asthma… but it would work great for someone else.

Guided dream walks… like mini meditations during the day.  To have positive associations with the quiet of bedtime.

Often times bad dreams are the result of unfinished business during the day.  They are scary or frightening because the sub conscious is upset.  Trying to solve what’s got you or your child upset is the most direct course of action.  Bad dreams are only a symptom of the problem.  Hope this is helpful.  Sweet dreams!

This past weekend was eventful – frustrating at times, amusing, entertaining, and embarrassing as well.

It started well, with a visit to Cora’s with Daniel and Robert. Robert didn’t disappoint, delighting me with his incessant need for sugar consumption. The effects of all that sugar is always a delight to behold. We got up to Embolden, for a 3pm talk on Meditation.

Now, there are certain individuals within Toronto’s pagan community who do not delight me in any shape or form. But they exist for various reasons. The individual who sat there, waiting to start his talk on meditation, is one such individual. It was unfortunate that he chose to talk about Buddhism instead of “Meditation 101″; whether he understood what was expected, or if he chose to ignore such a request and carry on discussing what Buddhism, I don’t know. I did find value in what he spoke about, as I view each “talk” I attend as a learning opportunity – either about the topic, or about myself.

My young friend was frustrated and I had to remind him to calm down. Maybe because of the challenges I’ve faced in the past 2 years with regards to my health I tend to be more patient than before, and have learnt not to worry about items/situations out of my control. My friend did manage to calm down. The fellow presenting the talk can be quite exasperating, but instead of fuming and complaining, what one should do (and my friend did this, so I applaud him for this) is offer to do a talk and contribute in some fashion instead of being a passive complainer.

As I said, the fellow can be exasperating, to such a point that one lady left in the middle and another friend chose to leave immediately after the talk because it made him either feel uncomfortable or there was a slight distaste for the presentation.

Afterwards it was onto the Sex Show down at Exhibition Place. I got to beat Robert a few times, and had the great fun of thrusting a few vibrators against this Little Robert. The rolling eyes were quite fun, and more so his shivers of delight over being beaten. I think I’ve found a new activity which I can thoroughly enjoy… not necessarily beating Robert, but I liked the heft of the horsetail and the effects it can have when used on bare flesh.

Yesterday it was my Survival Piss-up. I was reminded a wee while ago that it cannot be my piss-up if I don’t drink. I promised to imbibe one alcoholic drink … ONE. Tarotcub immediately got me a Fuzzy Navel, which I drank (it was good, I quite liked it). Then there was a bit of a discussion with regards to what my next drink would be. I ended up having four cocktails. I did feel a tad fuzzy and at one point my toes felt numb. But the effects wore off rather quickly and by the time I left the pub I was stone cold sober.

For my friends reading this blog, this does not mean you can now delight in getting me even more drinks. I may have enjoyed the Fuzzy Navel and other cocktails, but I have no plans of drinking at every social occassion. Again, I will have to be guilted into it, and I believe I have found ways to resist this “peer pressure”.

In Autumnal Fog ist eine weitere Sampler Reihe vom Skeksis Netlabel Projekt, von denen auch die “10 Songs For Free Download” Reihe stammt. Die aktuelle Ausgabe umfasst 3 CD’s voller Neo-/Dark-Folk, Black- und Pagan-Metal.

Die Tracklist gibt’s auf der Seite des Projekts und wer reinhören will zieht sich den Trailer rein.

Download:  In Autumnal Fog 2009

Evergreen Yule Candles
from Kaboose

What You Need:

• Paraffin
• Empty, clean, dry can
• Pan
• Water
• Use of a stove
• Paint brush
• Candle (a large candle is easier to use)
• Small Sprig of evergreen
• Holiday ribbon

Melt some paraffin inside a can placed in a pan of hot water (on the stove). Flatten the small evergreen sprig and put some hot paraffin on the candle where you want the sprig to go. Place the sprig decoratively on the hot paraffin – it should stick to the candle. Then paint more melted paraffin over the sprig of evergreen. Let set. You may need multiple coats. Tie festive ribbon around base of candle. This will make a nice centerpiece or to give as a gift.
Adult supervision is recommended.
This project is rated EASY to do

Disclaimer: No one involved in this blog or its contents may be held responsible for any adverse reactions arising from following any of the instructions/recipes on this list. It is the reader’s personal responsibility to exercise all precautions and use his or her own discretion if following any instructions or advice from this blog.

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You will need:

• Green paper/card
• Googlie eyes
• White and Pink paper/card
• Pipe Cleaners
• Stickers, glitter
• PVA glue and sticky tape

You can either scale down the template from the following link   http://www.hostessblog.com/wp-content/uploads/uploaded_images/paper_cone_template.pdf  or you can use a compass to draw a circle 8cm in diameter and then a protractor to mark off 210 degrees on your circle. Either way you want to do this on green card.

Cut out the circle, then the two portions and retain your waste. This forms the body and you can decorate it in any way you like.

Put to one side and take the waste and cut out two boot shapes. Bend the pipe cleaner in half and stick the two boots on the ends. Take the body and roll into a cone with the pipe cleaner sticking no more than 1cm above the edge (you want to be able to see the boots below the cone)

Now take the green, pink and white paper/card and cut an oval of pink, a beard shape of white and a hat of green. Stick together to make Father Christmas’ face and add the googly eyes in place.

Tie a peice of sting to the pipe cleaner to create a hanging loop and then secure Father Cristmas’ face to the pipe cleaner.

Now he’s ready to hang on you tree or about your house.

A nice variation of this would be a green man and earth/moon goddess as altar decorations. The Greenman would need to be all in green whilst the Earth goddess could also be in greens and browns, just use wool for hair. The moon goddess would look lovely in black/deep blue and white.

year …. 2009
style….Pagan / Viking Metal
country …. Germany
format …. Mp3 @ 320kbit (Lame-3.93.1)
size …. 100

Good album!

01. Nach Asgard wir reiten 04:07
02. Battle Metal 02:57
03. Varusschlacht 04:53
04. Wer Wind saht … 03:37
05. Varar 04:26
06. Im Herzen des Eises 03:16
07. Nordmanner 04:38
08. Worringen 03:48
09. Schutt und Asche 03:21
10. Blut und Feuer 06:16

I keep banging on about the fact that you don’t need to buy any tools to walk the path, but then again, these are not tools but little treats. As you might have guessed, this is more work of the talented Carolina Gonzalez.

This lady is Called Santisima Muerte and is a Holy Death Altar Doll. For more information on this lovely lady please refer to Carolina’s site here

And to round it off I also bought a print of one of her original drawings called The Horned Goddess. More of her work can be found at The Hoodoo Shop

For now this is my little set-up in the bedroom away from prying eyes. It is not set in stone but always changing depending on what I find. This can be bought, made or found in nature like all the stones that you can see on the bottom shelf. Although, if I carry on like this it will end up as Carolina Gonzales shrine to her work before you get the wrong idea .     

Format: Best of/Compilation
Year: 2009
Label: Skeksis86 Netlabel
Country: N/A
Genre: Ambient Folk/Black/Pagan Metal
Official Website

Chapter I: Under the Rising Storm

01. Novemthree – Reaching the Summit at Nightfall
02. SIG:AR:TYR – Blood of the North
03. Der Weg Einer Freiheit – Spätsommer
04. Imperium Dekadenz – An Autumn Serenade
05. Mondstille – Mir Träumt
06. Schattenvald – Rot Vor Hass Glüht’s Im Gebirg
07. The Hare and the Moon – The Thin Ghost
08. Svartvarg – An[]Le(h)nen
09. Black Autumn – The Threefold Life

Chapter II: Wandering Through Forlorn Landscapes

01. Munarheim – Herbst
02. Falls of Rauros – The Fire We Fathered
03. Neglektum – Obsolete Ways
04. Oakenshield – Twa Corbies
05. Nest – Kontio
06. Stjarna – Evocation
07. Art of Empathy – The Design
08. Njiqahdda – Envaas Fortu Vaan

Chapter III: Nightfall in the Darkstone Forest

01. Upon Ruins – Solitude and Distant Thunder
02. Vurgart – Blätter Fallen Von Den Ästen
03. Woodland Choir – I’ve Found Me in You
04. Empty Vessel Music – The Burial
05. Message to Bears – Running Through Woodland
06. Astoroth – Mondnacht
07. Wendess – Aux Jours Maussades
08. Elysium + Obscura – Ascension
09. Betray-Ed – Wandering
10. Nyctalgia – Remains of a Blue Rose
11. Q_Snc – A Moment in Grief
12. Trauerspiel – Hall of Sorrow
13. Naudhiz – Schattenwege (with Susanne S.)

Download
Chapter I, Chapter II, Chapter III @ Internet Archive
Chapter I, Chapter II, Chapter III @ RapidShare

Dear Witchful Thinking,

I was at a Pagan festival last spring and met a lot of people. Both men and women told me I was very pretty and asked if I would like to come to their tent. While everyone was very friendly, some were more persistent than others in getting to know me–even after I told them I had a boyfriend. That usually shuts people up, but why didn’t they leave me alone after I told them about my relationship?

Sincerely,

Hotly Pursued

Dear Hotly,

Let’s talk about Pagan sexuality. I’ll give you a broad background of knowledge that I think will explain the answer to your question. First of all, Paganism and Wicca are fertility religions and have an avowed interest in nature, which is not known for being modest. With fertility comes a high acceptance of sexuality and sensuality (because you can’t have babies without sex…unless it’s parthenogenesis). We see it in our Gods too. I mean, come on, the guys got horns! Have you ever seen a stag during rutting season? Talk about horney! And how many liaisons and  kids did Zeus have?

Pagans accept their natural processes, from menstruation to morning wood. Our essence and life depends on the fecundity of the Earth. Lucky for us, we don’t have original sin, so we can enjoy the gifts of sexuality that the Gods gave us without feeling guilty. But our culture is saturated with that guilt (really, Americans are quite puritanical that way), so many Pagans come into the community feeling released for the first time from the guilt and shame about their bodies and how they enjoy them. Sometimes that liberation is expressed a little too enthusiastically, and otherwise normal people over do it a little–so perhaps your persistent admirers fall in that category. If they have a good community, they can quickly settle within the acceptable norms of the new community. But folks who only see other Pagans occasionally take a bit longer to get the message about the appropriateness of their behavior. And if the community is not very mature as a group, unacceptable behavior may go on longer than is desired and lead to conflict.

There tend to be more Pagan women in the communities then active men. Which makes every man seem like a prize. Generally, folks have discovered that same-religion relationships work out better in the long run than multi-faith households, although no religion seems immune to the high divorce rates (almost 70% of marriages end in divorce now). So folks of any sexual preference are keen to choose a mate from the community. Of course, the excitement of sexual attraction is usually where the search begins.

With a sex-positive atmosphere, and the lack of original sin, the openness brings in people that are

"As the athame is to the male, and the cup is to the female, conjoined they bring blessedness!"

already on the fringe of mainstream society. The Pagan community has become a haven for gay, lesbian, bi, transgendered, queer…everyone is welcome here–and rightly so! In particular, The Feri Tradition seems to offer a home for everybody. In Wicca, the Lord and Lady generally engage in heterosexual behavior, but there are many examples of sexual variety in mythology. Many ritualists celebrate the union of the Gods with the Great Rite (and the great rite too), and I have been beautifully moved by the variations of, say, the cup uniting with the cup to create overflowing abundance, or two athames touching tenderly.

With this openness comes a willingness to try alternative relationship styles. In particular, some people engage in Polyamory, where erotic love is shared

This could get complicated...

between many adult partners. Consequently, being married or in a relationship doesn’t mean that you are not available! It is not an invitation to an orgy, but rather an openness to go where love will take you, to desire your lover to be happy–even if that means being with another person. It is agreed upon by all partners, and relationships can get quite complex (we call it a poly-cule [like molecule, get it?]) It requires constant work through ideas of jealously and possession, which means looking inward and releasing old hurts. There are some excellent books on the subject if you want to know more. Other people in the community may engage in Slave/Master type BDSM relationships (or variants thereof. You can ask questions here).

Here is the basic rule of Pagan sexuality: nothing is assumed. You can be yourself (perhaps for the first time) as who you really are, as long as you treat all people with respect.

A few more guidlines:

• Local and Federal Laws still apply! Do not approach teens under the age of consent. Consult your state’s statutory rape laws. In Washington the age of consent is 16, but that doesn’t mean they want to have sex with a 30 year old.
• No means no, no matter what age you are, your sexual orientation or relationship status. Just because someone is poly doesn’t mean they will have sex with you.
• Use protection. Yes, we are a fertility religion, but that doesn’t mean every woman is ready to have babies. It is essential to discuss this before engaging in sexual activity.
• Get tested. Are you clean? Really clean? People with certain STD’s are legally obligated to tell their partner before engaging in ANY sexual activity. This varies by state, so know your status and then ask your doctor what the rules are.
• Sex should not be a requirement to advance in the community. However, there are covens and groups who engage in sex practices as part of their worship. If you are not comfortable with this, find another coven. There are other places to get training, and you shouldn’t have to have sex with someone to get it.
• Set your own limits beforehand. If you already know what your boundaries are, it will be easier not to cross them. If you are in a relationship, talk with your partner about what is acceptable to you. Some couples have a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy about festivals, while others are totally open. Still most prefer to keep their monogamous status, and that’s ok too. As long as everybody agrees, there hopefully won’t be a problem.
• Don’t be a bastard. Please don’t talk about your sexual conquests to your buddies after the festival is over. I’ve had wonderful experiences and new relationships ruined because of bragging to friends. It belittles the experience and trivializes the energies it generated–not to mention makes it a lot less likely to happen again.
• Nudity does not mean sex. Some communities are clothing-optional, but that is not an invitation to sex. Calm down. Appreciation is ok, but lewd comments won’t get you invited back.
• Word travels fast. Someone who persistently violates the social mores can be red flagged as dangerous or unwanted, they may even be asked to leave. The safety of the community is paramount.
• The festival is for spiritual change, not your sexual pleasure. Remember why you are at the festival. Even if it is just to meet people and make connections, some people come there for different reasons which do not include having sex with everyone. Respect that.
• Follow the festival rules about sex. Some festivals have places set aside for just such an activity, especially if there is group living arrangements. The ones I go to have Aphrodite shrines and Pan shrines for just such worship. It’s easy to avoid if you aren’t interested in that kind of activity. Sometimes it is hard to find a secluded area, but do try: after all, it is still not ok to have sex in front of children.
• Every community is different. Each festival is different. Go with what is appropriate (and within your boundaries) in the community. If it is not to your taste, find or start, a different community. I guarantee there are like minded people out there somewhere whose tastes run along yours.

In closing, it must be said that no matter what the cultural norms are, you always have a right to your body and what you do with it. No one has the right to make you do something you don’t want to do. You can say no at any time, so make your boundaries clear. If you have been raped, call the police or a rape crisis line (800-656-4673). Pagan sexuality is a glorious variety of openness and opportunity if you choose to engage yourself there. Sexuality is beautiful when given and shared by people, and we are lucky that our communities allow that kind of expression. But the potential for abuse is there, and regular rules of etiquette still apply.

Enjoy!

_________________

Some good books:

“Pagan Polyamory: Becoming a Tribe of Hearts” by Raven Kaldera

Rites of Pleasure: Sexuality in Wicca and Neo-Paganism by Jennifer Hunter

Living With Honour: A Pagan Ethics by Emma Restall Orr

Dark Moon Rising: Pagan BDSM and the Ordeal Path by Raven Kaldera and Bridgett Harrington

The Practical Pagan: Commonsense Guidelines for Modern Practitioners by Dana Eilers

Pagan Protocol by L.S. Alabaster

I am watching my family from the balcony while they are flying a kite. They take their turn to play with it before it hits the ground (mainly for my daughter).

The weather this week has been an extreme up and down from days like spring to stormy days for kites. Now heavy rain is hammering against the house leaving behind a rice field in the garden.

I survived yesterdays party and tried to make an effort to at least sit with some of the others. Luckily the music and kids were to loud so I just read one of the magazines lying around. I am sure the next party will follow soon .

Otherwise not much has been happening. Santisima Muerte moved in this week , but more about that for a later entry. Also for a later entry, I would like to start a category called ~ Back to Basics ~ and who knows, maybe some of the blog readers will participate.  

Rituals have been a part of the world as long as humanity has existed.  From the annual celebration of our birth, to our daily behavioral patterns, we have all incorporated basic ritualistic activities in our lives.  Every culture on earth has certain customs they follow for births, weddings, religious rites, and funerals.  These actions, whether they are performed as festivities, for comfort, or out of habit, all have an underlying power that feeds our growth and wisdom.

In a spiritual sense, rituals are one of the most effective and reliable ways for people to honor and commune with the Divine. The act of ceremony not only gives a comfortable structure, but also allows us the time and focus to interact with Spirit and the divinity within ourselves.  Many practicing pagans and witches seem to fall out of ritual observance the longer we spend in the Craft. We begin to shortcut our practice, no longer taking the time and preparation needed to truly give honor to our spiritual path. By taking the quick and easy route, we are cheating ourselves out of the opportunity for great change.

Starhawk, one of the most prolific Goddess authors of our time says, “Any ritual is a chance for transformation.” Whether we are performing ritual to heal ourselves or in tribute, we are creating sacred space in order to change the energy that surrounds us. Each ring of a bell, each sage leaf burned, every prayer spoken, transmutes and re-develops our energy into a higher vibration.  The positive energy we create not only affects our lives, but creates a chain reaction of love and Divine connection which spreads throughout those we know and continues to vibrate throughout the world.

With the traditions in Goddess spirituality there are countless ways to effectively perform ceremony, whether you are working in a group setting or in solitude.  Generally speaking, the most powerful rituals you can perform are those created by your own hand; designed to suit your specific needs, desires, and the level of your spiritual connection.  Each practitioner follows their intuition to a certain degree, as the layout of the ritual is not as important as the faith and love that drive it. However, it is advisable to have a basic structure to follow within all your rites, regardless of purpose.

One of the best basic outlines for rituals, whether for solitary or coven use, is an excerpt from the book “To Ride a Silver Broomstick” by Silver Ravenwolf. It’s simple and to the point, works for personal or Sabbat/Esbat rituals, and is included below:

A.  Ritual Preparation

1.  Define purpose
2.  Write ritual
3.  Gather necessary tools
4.  Prepare area – (cleaning, sage, etc)
5.  Prepare body – (purification bath, donning special clothing/jewelry)

B.  Open Circle

1.  Find true North
2.  Set up Magickal ‘doorway’ / Cast Circle
3.  Call the Watchtowers / Elemental Quarters (East/ Air, South/Fire, West/Water, Earth/North)

C.  Invocation to the deities

1.  Align self with deity (evoke)
2.  Invoke deities

D.  Statement of Purpose

E.  Actual Rite

1.  Working
a.  Complete preliminary manual or visual task
b.  Raise power / energy
c.  Focus power / energy
d.  Ground power / energy

2.  Honoring
a.  Complete preliminary manual or visual task
b.  Dedicate cakes and wine
c.  Partake in cakes and wine

F.  Meditation

G.  Thanking the deities

H.  Closing the Circle

1.  Mentally and verbally dismiss the Quarters/ Close the circle
2.  Physically close the circle
3.  Clean up
a.  Disposal
b.  Washing of plates and glasses
c.  Putting away tools and other implements

There are many reference books you can use to help plan your rituals. Here are a few recommend titles, which are all available for purchase here:

• The Goddess Guide by Brandi Auset
• Women’s Rites, Women’s Mysteries by Ruth Barrett
• Living Wicca by Scott Cunningham
• The Outer Temple of Witchcraft by Christopher Penczak
• The Wiccan Book of Ceremonies and Rituals by Patricia Telesco
• Creating Circles & Ceremonies: Rituals for All Seasons And Reasons by Oberon Zell-Ravenheart and Morning Glory Zell-Ravenheart
• Neopagan Rites: A Guide to Creating Public Rituals that Work by Isaac Bonewits

And there are endless online resources available. Try a Google search – not only will you find information for planning your own rituals, but you may find public pagan celebrations in your area.

Blessed Be!

Ideally everyone would have their own private altar, a sacred space which could be used as the focal point of prayer and meditation. However, sometimes circumstances prevent this from happening: lack of space, lack of privacy, money, etc. However, it is important to remember that the tools and physical objects we use in ritual are symbolic. They help, but in the end are unnecessary.

If you find you are in need of your own sacred space, consider building one as a mental construct. In this way, you’ll only need a private place to meditate, and good visualization skills.

Start by practicing visualization. When you see sometihing – a color, a shape, an object – close your eyes and try to reproduce it as accurately as possible. This may be difficult, but with practice, you will improve. Continue on with sounds, scents, textures, even tastes, until you feel comfortable enough to move on.

Now it is necessary to decide what you want your sacred space to look like. This may depend on your spiritual path, as well as your own personal tastes. It does not have to be an ancient building with pillars and statues. It can be an office building, a place you remember from your childhood, a clearing in the woods, anywhere.

Set aside a time each day, say a half hour, when you will not be disturbed (say before bed, or even while you are in bed, if you feel comfortable meditating in a lying down postion without falling asleep). Close your eyes and imagine yourself decending a long staircase, lower and lower, until you reach your space. What do you see? What colors are there? What does it smell like? What textures do you feel?

Have your altar set up in the center of the space. What items are on it? Statues? Candles? Pictures of loved ones? Ritual tools? Remember to bless and consecrate each of the items you will be using on a regular basis.

Once your space is set up, you are free to use it as you wish. Talk with your spirit guides, loved ones that have passed on, with God him/herself. Clear away negativity. Work though issues in your daily life.

When you are ready to return, walk back up the staircase. When you reach the top, open your eyes.

If you need to, draw a map or diagram of your space to help you visualize. Alternatively, if you have a physical space but travel away from it often, memorize it so that you can return to it when you need to.

Ah the holidays…..The most wonderful time of the year!  Children laughing, people visiting families and sitting down for holiday dinners, relatives coming to feast on the meal that took days to prepare and then leave with a full plate and not so much as an offer to help clean up, the bickering between grown siblings, the drunken fights and a year of resentment pent up waiting to be unleashed at the first opportunity!  Why do we put ourselves through the same routine year after year?  What is this mess of a tradition that has been handed down to each generation, some kind of payback for a failed previous life?  Year after year we are  thrown this “Holiday Season” as it is called and made to believe that “it is better to give than to receive”.  Better for who?  I’ll tell you who……….The Christians and THE RETAIL INDUSTRY!

Flashback 4000 years ago and we’ll find that Pagans were the first to celebrate Saturnalia or the Winter Solstice.  They celebrated the return of the sun after a long cold winter.  The evergreen was a symbol of life that endured during the harsh winter months so they brought them into their homes.  Some hung apples from them to remind them that the spring and summer would eventually return hence the decorating of the tree.  The name Christmas would not come for another 2o00 years when Christ was born(if he really was born that is).  The exact day of the Christ’s birth has never been pinpointed.  Many say that it has been celebrated since 98 AD.  In 137 AD the Bishop of Rome ordered the birthday of Christ celebrated as a solemn feast. In 350 AD another Bishop of Rome, Julius I, chose December 25th as the official day of Christmas.

Christians did not believe in the Pagan rituals and traditions so they decided to name it Christmas which translates into Mass of Christ.  It is believed by many that Christmas was made up to compete with the Pagan celebrations of winter.  By the middle ages the Pagan celebrations were replaced by Christian traditions because it was thought by the church that the Pagan traditions and beliefs were an abomination.  So as usual, the Christians once again imposed their beliefs onto the rest of society.  Some things just never change do they!?!

So what’s with all this pressure to give, give, give??  Why is it that we spend hundreds if not thousands of dollars every year on people we rarely see and usually bitch about constantly?  How is it that we were able to corrupt such a meaningful celebration of the season and of life and of our surroundings into such a chaotic and bogus reason to spend mindlessly by either emptying our pockets or racking up debt only to realize that by the time all is said and done, the only thing we have left to show for the holiday is the longing for everything to slow down for a while and to never see your relatives again (or for at least another year).

According to some, no one was in the habit of giving gifts until the late 1800’s when stories of Santa Claus giving gifts to the children became popular, most likely a story made up by American retailers to boost sales and to start a tradition that would keep them rich for centuries to come.  This tradition was taken from, once again, the Pagans that would take to the street during the winter solstice celebrations and bring food and good-luck gifts, usually fruit, to one another for the coming year.  Those traditions, in my mind, make much more sense than all of the hoopla that we are forced to endure for at least 4 months out of the year.  Retailers have shoved Christmas and most other holidays down our throats and up our asses in an attempt to line their pockets and use our economy as an excuse to justify their actions.

I would have to think that the worst part to this entire Holiday Season is that everything we do echoes down into the future so what legacy are we leaving  behind for the next generation.  What are we teaching kids by going broke in order to satisfy a child who in no way has earned the right to be lavished with expensive gifts.  ”If you are good just before Christmas time then Santa will bring you everything you ask for and afterward you can go back to being the total prick that you are!”  How about we stop rewarding them for bad behavior and ONLY reward them when they actually earn it?  Why does it have to be one time out of the year?  Sorry dumb asses but it seems that your spawn have ultimately won the upper hand and you have only become a game piece in one of the hundreds of games that you spoiled your spunk with!

Okay so I don’t want to make this all about the children because enough of them already think it is!  After all it isn’t their fault that they don’t have the proper representation in life to guide them, that’s your own damned fault!  Did you really think that raising them would be as easy as making them?  Yeah you would think that!

So after all is said and done, I still find myself trying to justify to others why it is that I am not fond of the holiday season.  I find myself attempting to defend my thoughts and my beliefs and continue to have to listen to the cries of certain others  such as, “but it’s the time of year that you should be with your family” and “you should be tolerant and put all of your feelings aside”.  Show me where the fuck this rule book is that dictates to me how I should ignore everything that I am feeling inside simply so that I can sit in a house full of people that quite frankly I either don’t know or just don’t give a rats ass about one way or the other.   Tell me not that it’s written in the “good book” and that I missed that chapter during the Sunday school lessons I was forced to attend as a child!

You are probably wondering why I am the way I am and now that I have gotten to this part of this post I can say without a doubt that the firm belief in faith that my mother holds in the church mixed with the uncertainty and stupidity of my fathers ridiculous quest for God, has given me the ability to seek out information and distinguish reality from absurdity.  For me, the holidays were forever changed because as a child my parents made their intentions for divorce a reality during that time but make no mistake, they did not ruin my ability to seek out the truth and to celebrate it as I see fit.  In fact, my eyes are open much wider because of it.

So the next time you are bouncing around town on Christmas Eve doing last minute holiday shopping for a co-worker that you barely know or for a nephew that is fresh out of detention and you are stressing and counting your last pennies, try and remember where the true meaning of the holiday came from and toss them an apple instead!

Thanks to those of you who encouraged me to keep writing.  My husband is happy that this blog is making me happy, so off I go with more posts!  On to the subject at hand.

I was baptized a few months after I was born.  I was raised in the Roman Catholic faith.  Sundays meant mass, grade school meant sacraments and more mass, and holidays meant longer masses.  I have no terrible memories of my Catholic upbringing.  My parents are devout Catholics, I suppose, and I admire them for their quiet adherence to their faith.  They don’t push their religion on others, they seem to genuinely like the practice of their faith, and they are good people.

I fell off the wagon of Catholicism during graduate school; my schedule became hectic and I stopped going to mass.  I still prayed and still felt a tug of loyalty to the pope and to the Church.  Then it was time to get married.  My husband is also Catholic and we decided to get married in the Church.  I don’t think it mattered all that much to either of us if we had a Church wedding or a Vegas wedding, but it mattered to our parents and we were happy to please them.

Enter the priest in charge of our marriage counseling.  He was a younger priest and I mistakenly thought his youth would make him a little more approachable, like Bing Crosby in The Bells of Saint Mary’s. Silly me.  This man of the cloth was straight out of pre-Vatican II doctrine.   He was joyless, he was dour, and he was filled with ominous messages of the terrible fate that would befall us if we didn’t mend our ways and start regularly attending mass.  He was not, in short, the best person to make us happy about our choice to marry in the Church.  Now, I’m not saying the priest should have told us exactly what we wanted to hear (i.e., “you don’t ever have to go to mass”), but I think he could have gotten his point across with a little less fire and brimstone.  The more we met with him, the more we wanted to elope.  But we gutted it out for our parents’ sake.

We had to take a quiz on our compatibility as part of our pre-marital counseling shortly before our wedding day.  I told my husband, before we went in our separate rooms, to answer the questions in the manner which our priest would want, even if he didn’t agree with the answer.  It would make our lives easier and spare us another long lecture.  However, my husband is more principled than I.  For the question, “can you think of any situation which would make you want to leave your spouse?”, I answered, “no”.  Now, that’s really not true.  There are plenty of situations which would potentially make me want to leave my spouse.  If he decides he loves someone else, for instance, it’s probably time to call it a day.  But I knew this was the answer the priest would like.   My husband answered the same question with an honest “yes”.  (Stupid husband.)  I applaud his honesty, don’t get me wrong, but I knew his answer would get our priest all riled up.  And it did.  He actually told us that I clearly loved my future husband more than he loved me based on his answer and that he was very concerned about the prospect of us marrying.  Seriously?  This was an old-school priest who could not condone divorce in any situation.

The priest did marry us.  His homily at our wedding mass was not one of those nice, “I’ve known X and Y for several months  now and I’ve watched them grow.  They are lovely people who are entering into marriage fully aware and fully devoted, blah blah blah”.  Nope.  Our priest gave a lecture on the evils of birth control.  Our non-Catholic guests looked thoroughly confused (actually, so did our Catholic guests).

After this soul-crushing experience, I wasn’t too motivated to get involved in my faith, as you might imagine.  My parents were nice about my lack of interest in Catholicism.  When I got the teaching job, my mom was thrilled.  Not because it was a teaching job (I’m sure she was happy about that), but because it was a job teaching at a Catholic school.  I believe her response to my news about the job was, “oh, does this mean you’ll start going to mass again?”.  Mom, I love you.

I did start going to the masses at school, mainly because I had to, but I found that I kind of enjoyed the ritual of the mass.  However, I think I naively assumed that a Catholic school would automatically be more moral, more forthright, and more, I don’t know, honest in its dealings than another type of high school.  (I don’t wish to malign public schools or private, secular schools; this was just my very childlike assumption at the time.  My husband is a product of public school high school and received a fantastic education.  I attended a secular private high school and can easily say that it was the best educational experience of my life.)  The school where I taught was great.  The teachers were devoted, the students were hard-working for the most part, and the experience was largely positive.

But I noticed a few things at my work place which gave me pause.  The freshmen at the high school were required to go on a spiritual retreat, one in which all faculty participated.  That’s fine; you go to a religious school, you participate in the religious activities even if you’re not part of that particular faith.  At the retreat, these very young students were expected to discuss their prayer life.  I was also expected to discuss my prayer life.  I don’t know about you, but I had little to no prayer life when I was fourteen, and I certainly wouldn’t have known how to discuss it in a room full of people.  I had a hard enough time discussing it as an adult teacher.  I watched these kids fumbling for words and I thought, this isn’t right.  Shouldn’t your prayer life be private?  Or, if you don’t choose to pray, shouldn’t that be OK too?  I’ve always admired people who keep their religious life to themselves rather than boastfully letting everyone know how holy they are.  Something about this retreat experience smacked of – dare I say it – indoctrination.  If you want kids to attend a religious retreat, fine.  Talk to them about religion, but don’t make them say stuff that they don’t necessarily mean or don’t want to say even if they mean it.

Other instances which have made me question my faith have cropped up since that retreat.  My retelling of those experiences would not necessarily make for good reading.  Suffice it to say that I am teetering on the edge of atheism at this point in my life.  I’m pretty certain I don’t believe in God, but I’m still too scared or nervous to fully commit to that belief.  (Which, some would say, proves that I still believe in my heart of hearts.  Maybe.)

Once my daughter was born, I started thinking about her potential baptism.  And I kept reflecting back to those fourteen-year-old kids who had no idea what they thought about religion; they just parroted what their parents thought for the most part.  I remembered my own childhood, how little I really cared about my first communion or my confirmation.  First communion meant getting to wear a white dress and confirmation meant gifts.  Did I want Daphne to be ushered into a faith that I didn’t really care about?  For what purpose?  If I don’t really buy into a lot of the preachings of Catholicism, why is it so important for me to have my daughter be Catholic?  Because it’s just what you do?  Because if a child isn’t baptized, she’s doomed to be a pagan and wander aimlessly in purgatory when she leaves this Earth?  If I don’t believe that, why should I baptize her?  (Also, I have to say that if God is busy making sure unbaptized kids stay in purgatory, I’m not really impressed with the way He prioritizes his to-do list.)

And I could only come up with two answers to that question.  First, I should baptize her because that’s what you do when you have a kid.  Well, there’s a lot of stuff I should do that I don’t do.  I should exercise, I should watch less TV, I should be nicer to people, I should register to vote, and the list goes on.  If the only reason I baptize my daughter is out of guilt, because it’s what I’m supposed to do, then I shouldn’t baptize her.  If I feel nothing toward my religion, it seems rather hypocritical to baptize my kid into that religion.

Second, I should baptize my daughter because it will make both my and my husband’s parents happy.  Well, parents, I know you want a baptism, but at the end of the day, our daughter is our daughter.  Let’s let her decide, when she’s got an intellect that can comprehend more than the subtleties of Elmo’s World, what she wants to do.  Let’s let her make a choice about her religion once she’s fully informed of her choices.  Oh, and we already did the Church wedding to please our parents.  And I’ve told you all how that turned out.

Yule Ritual for Children
by Michelle Balsley; November 17, 2000

Start this Seasonal Celebration early in the day, Make Sun symbol ornaments and White Stag Ornaments to hang on the Yule tree, You can always put some type of sealant on the ornaments and hang them outside on a special tree, if this is what you prefer.

Write your own songs to sing to the Lord on his day of rebirth. Decorate the house in Golds, Greens (Ivy, Pine), Whites, some Reds, cut out big Suns and Stars hang them around the house or make a mobile to hang from the ceiling.

Go walking through the woods, park and be on the look out for a Yule Log. And once you locate your Yule log, drill three holes in it, one for a White candle, Red candle, and a Black Candle (Maiden, Mother and Crone) place these in the holes that you drilled in the Yule Log and light the candles.

Decorate your Table/Altar in Golds and Whites.

Have the children and yourself, take a Ritual Bath, burn some Pine Incense or whatever appeals to your emotions and reminds you of Yule. Help each other get dressed for the Celebration of welcoming the rebirth of the Lord, and this is also the time to Thank the Lady. Everyone should have some part in helping to set up the Ritual Area, I use a Gold cord to mark the Circle, this helps the kids, as a Yule Ritual can be pretty long. (let the kids lay down in the Circle, the Lady understands-make special pillows, stuffed with Pine, Orange Peel, of course I wouldn’t suggest using Pine needles, nothing like having one stick you in the cheek, just use some Oil, these pillows are for the kids to put their heads on while they wait for the return of the Sun)

Once it gets closer to the Yule Ritual, have the Children welcome in the guests if any are coming.

The Ritual:

Lay the Gold cord on the floor
Cast your Circle
Call the Quarters
Welcome the Lady and the Lord

Mommy/Daddy:

"Welcome to our Yule Ritual, this is the time we look forward to our Sun/Lord/God to return, We have missed him high in the sky, smiling upon us as we start another day, his hugs are the rays that shin upon us as we work or play outside, his kisses are a warm breeze that gently caresses our cheeks, he is the green of the woods, the bright gold of the sun, he is the White Stag in the Woods, Protector and Watcher".

Children/All:

"Father/God/Lord we await your return". (Say as much as you want to, this is also a good short, sweet chant to use to raise any energy you may want during the ritual)

Mommy/Daddy:

"We light the Candles on the Yule log in honor the Goddess/Mother/Lady, White for the Maiden, Red for the Mother, and Black for the Crone". (Light the candles and let them burn, to almost the Yule log, don’t want the log to catch fire)

Children/All:

"We thank you Goddess/Lady for all that you have given us".(Once again another short and sweet chant to raise energy) At this time Share of some Cakes, Wine/Ale/Fruit Juice should be done. (One of our favorites is light and fluffy Divinity Candy, or baked sugar cookies that look like the Sun)

Share stories about Yule’s past and talk about what you would like to do next Yule Talk about what the Goddess and God mean to you and of course let the Children tell their Stories and feelings too! Exchange small Yule Gifts.

Mommy/Daddy:

"We thank the Lady and Lord on this day for the gifts they have given us, and for each other. Bright Blessings upon us all".

At this point you can either stay in the Circle and keep on talking until the Sun comes up, or dissolve the Circle, of course always thanking the Quarters and the Lady for being there. Go for a walk outside and Welcome the New day as the Sun comes back.

I know that this Ritual is not as formal, as some would wish, but you have to remember you are involving young Children with short attention spans (some adults have those, too!) These types of Short, Sweet and to the Point Rituals prepare your children for the more Formal ones later in this Lifetime. Blessings for a Bright Yule! (Copyright Michelle Balsley About this author: Wiccan, Married, two children, work full time outside the home, I live in a small town, love to write, read, swim, and laugh. )

Disclaimer: No one involved in this blog or its contents may be held responsible for any adverse reactions arising from following any of the instructions/recipes on this list. It is the reader’s personal responsibility to exercise all precautions and use his or her own discretion if following any instructions or advice from this blog.

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I always thought I knew about the origins of Santa Claus and Father Christmas, after all they are the same person aren’t they? When I set out on this I was looking for a ‘pagan’ figure to hold up to my daughter as ‘the spirit of Yule/Christmas’  I realised that whilst they have the same recent history they have different ancient origins.

 The jolly figure of winter fun and frivolity has many names such as Ded Moroz (Farther Frost) in Russia, Sinter Klaas (sound familiar?) in Holland, Pere Noel in France and Farther Christmas in England and the UK. These figures are depicted as wearing red, with flowing white beards sat astride horse or reindeer drawn sleighs in the whitest winter settings but each has an older pagan root which was adopted and adapted by the Christians.

 The differences in the two are slight and can be viewed in terms of the spirit of the season and the cost of the season. Father Christmas doesn’t have the commercial connotations that Santa Claus does and can be found to contain more pagan iconography than the fat, jolly, red faced man in red and white.  I will briefly outline the combined origins of these two figures and set out the period of history since the 1800’s that so firmly divided Christmas and Clause.

Old Man Winter

Considering that there are many henge’s and monuments there are marking the mid-winter solstice it is safe to assume that this event was marked at some stage throughout British pre-history. Whether there was a personification of the season apart from the returning sun god will never be known. It is likely that there was some native representation akin to Jack Frost and Russia’s Ded Moroz  and this figure was absorbed by later traditions entering the land but there is no way to prove it.

 The earliest traditions refer to ‘Old Man Winter’ and ‘Father Winter’ and are linked to the incoming Nordic populations. Old Man Winter is linked to Odin, who rode through the land on Mid-Winters eve on his magical, eight legged horse Sleiphir, seeking hospitality and rewarding both the bad and good accordingly. By the laws of hospitality in Scandinavia at this time any visitors were to be treated like their were Gods incarnate. Old Man Winter would be invited into the house to take part in the festivities in an attempt to ‘warm him up’ in advance of the new year.

 When the Vikings invaded Britain in the 8^th and 9^th Cen’s that they introduced this proto-Father Christmas to the native populations, and it is likely that Odin as Father Winter was combined with the pre-existing example of the Yule Spirit. It was the arrival of the Normans in 1066 that brought the most commonly associated ‘Father Christmas’ figure, St Nicholas. Nicholas was originally from southern Turkey, and was canonised for his charitable works. I will go into more detail later but it is at this time gift giving becomes associated with the figure of winter.

 Father Christmas

It wasn’t until the 15^th century that the first carol was written and Sir Christmas first made his appearance. By the 17^th Century, and especially in the reign of the party loving Tudor King Henry VIII, Captaine Christmas (old Christmas) was taking centre stage as the MC of Christmas celebrations. In Tudor York, Mr and Mrs Christmas would ride through the streets giving gifts of meat and grains to the poor and needy, likely portrayed by a leading member of the merchant classes and his wife. In these instances Christmas is described to have been wearing green, as apposed to red, with a long flowing beard. 

 It was in the 1640’s that the Puritans limbered up to attack and destroy Father Christmas. He was too frivolous and too pagan for their sensibilities. Whilst they didn’t totally destroy him he didn’t regain any real popularity until the advent of the Victorian’s, when there was a revival of all things jolly.

It is now that Father Christmas’ role begins to change. The Victorians not only re-embrace this wonderful mythical figure but re-invent him. The put him on their greeting cards and start to write stories and poems about him and his exploits. He even puts in an appearance in the Dickens’ novel A Christmas Carol as the green clad Spirit of Christmas Present. But it is now that we begin to see the emergence of the New World equivalent, Santa Claus. Slowly but surely there is a drip drip drip of contamination and can mark the first time that ‘King Winter’ is decked out in red.

The New World Order

You’ll notice in paragraph two I made reference to Sinter Klaas and how similar to Santa Claus this is. More so than Father Christmas, Santa Claus is directly linked to St Nicholas. As different European cultures settled in the new world they brought their own religious traditions.

St Nicholas, as we have already seen, is closely associated with this time of year. His saint day was the 6^th of December and he was canonised for his charity and spontaneous gift giving. When the various people reached America the variety of names could be seen. He takes the form of Père Nöel in France and Christ Kind in Germany whilst the Dutch called him Sinter Klass. It is this persona that eventually evolved into Santa Claus.

It isn’t until the 19^th Century that that the more popularised and commercialised American concept of Santa Clause the gift giver reached our shores.  There are hundreds of poems and stories about Santa Clause, “A Visit from Saint Nicholas” or “’Twas the Night before Christmas” written by Dr Clement Clare Moore in 1882. Its from this tale that we get the 8 names for the reindeer with Rudolph being added in 1939 by Robert May, an employee of the Montgomery Ward department store chain as a special promotion which simply caught on.

It was 40 years later when Thomas Nast, cartoonist for Harper’s Weekly immortalized the images that we know so well and which form the basis for the rampant commercialization that is associated with this time of year. It is now that his home is firmly placed in the North Pole, and the letters of request from bright eyes, rosy cheeked children came into effect. His red clothing is first posed, as is his preference for Mince Pies and Whisky. This image was set in place in the 1930’s when Santa sold his soul to Coke-Cola.

My Decision

After this little splurge of research, which isn’t definitive by any stretch of the imagination, you can imagine I hadn’t really answered my question. Father Christmas is truly British, and begins live in very confirmed pagan origins and can be more readily reconciled with the Green Man and Old Man Winter. However, his later associations with Christians might be seen by some as ‘contamination’. On the other hand, Sinterklass and by extension Santa Claus is firmly entrenched in Christian origins and has the added taint of American commercialism.

Personally, it is Father Christmas that comes to our home on both the 21^st and 25^th of December. Treats will be left out for him, in memory of the Scandinavian traditions of hospitality, and the small gifts that get sequestered around the bedroom (unless I go with a stocking/sack to make my life a little easier) are signed from him.

http://www.arthuriana.co.uk/xmas/ a guide to online resources

http://skandland.com/vikxmas.htm

http://www.pagannews.com/cgi-bin/sabbats1.pl?Yule

http://skandland.com/vikxmas.htm

http://www.pagannews.com/cgi-bin/sabbats1.pl?Yule

http://www.whychristmas.com/customs/fatherchristmas.shtml

http://www.worldofchristmas.net/christmas-stockings/history.html

As we approach the holiday season, many of my pagan friends feel a bit disconnected from the Thanksgiving celebrations. As an earth based spirituality and religion, Pagans always seem at odds during certain celebrations such as St. Patrick’s, which is an extremely large celebration for the city of Savannah. Well received in the areas of economy, development and growth for our city St. Patrick’s has become a synonym for Savannah tourists.

The question that we as followers of an earth based religion need to ask is what we can do during this holiday season to make it a time of thanksgiving. If history has taught us anything is that, we can change things for a better future and with that high vibration; we resonate in a higher level of consciousness allowing ourselves to write new stories as well as history. To begin lets talk about the all-Pagan symbolism that we will able to find at most American homes during this holiday. Turkey: Symbolic of harvest and shared blessings of Mother Earth. Native American Indians view the turkey as a both a symbol of abundance and fertility. The turkey was the guest of honor (sacrificial, that is) in various fertility and gratitude ceremonies. The Creek tribes (like the Yamacraw Indians) that still practice the turkey dance during its annual fire festivals. Rabbit: Although not mentioned in accounts of the feast, was one of the foods available to the Pilgrims in 1621. Rabbits and hares are new life, fertility, intuition, balance and rebirth.

Apple: Avalon is from a Celtic word meaning apple. The apple tree is the Celtic tree of life. Symbolic of love, purity and wisdom.

Pumpkin: Represents the sun to some Native Americans tribe. Symbolic of power.

Wheat: Often use in magical workings for prosperity and abundance. Always have some hanging in your kitchen for prosperity.

Corn: Represents the power of people, fertility and healing. The oldest corns date 7000 years back and were grown in Mexico. Americans taught pilgrims how to grow corn and help them survive the bitter winter of 1620. It is certain that corn were a part of the first thanksgiving dinner.

In addition, let us not forget the cornucopia according to the dictionary: 1. A goat’s horn overflowing with fruit, flowers, and grain, signifying prosperity. Also called horn of plenty.2. Greek Mythology The horn of the goat that suckled Zeus, which broke off and became filled with fruit. In folklore, it became full of whatever its owner desired.3. A cone-shaped ornament or receptacle.4. An overflowing store; an abundance

Savannah, GA’s weather never disappoints we enjoy what some call Indian Summers until late November. It is at this time that you are packing your summer items and those items that perhaps do not fit and that you no longer want. A good old fall cleaning session before the new goodies arrive in December please, do not forget those less fortunate and give the Goodwill a hand.

To fight hunger in Savannah follow this link.

http://www.examiner.com/x-26588-Savannah-Paganism-Examiner

Sources:
Animal-Speak, Ted Andrews, (Llewellyn Publications, 2002)
The Dictionary of Native American Mythology, Sam D. Gill & Irene F. Sullivan, (Oxford University Press, 1992)

The Wheel is turning and the dark of the year approaches. It is time to face the dark and come to terms with it. Let’s face it: our culture doesn’t deal very well with death. To start, we don’t really talk about it, we talk around it with euphemisms which deny its power. Can we deal with something whose very name we fear?

As a pre-service mental health counselor, and as a frequent attendee and cast-member of the ATC’s Hekate Sickle Festival, I see a lot of grief, and not always in the way one would expect. Someone does not have to die for us to experience grief. Any loss can trigger deep feelings of pain and buried memories. We can grieve over the loss of a relationship, a job, of future possibilities that can’t come to fruition. Sometimes grief is subtle, and we don’t realize that it is affecting us. Grief and mourning are individual, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve, but there are some guidelines that one should keep in mind.

Where are you now?

Imagine grief is like a map. There are recognizable landmarks, clear paths, and places to get lost. You can travel in any direction and stay for any length of time, or even return to a place you’ve already visited. Each person’s journey is different, so everyone’s grief map is different. To orient you, Kubler-Ross and others identified five different areas of grief. Pagans may find some identity with the five elements:

• Denial — “I feel fine.”; “This can’t be happening, not to me.”; “I don’t believe it.”; “I don’t feel anything.”; “It’s not important.” Denial is often a temporary defense for the individual. It is used as a coping mechanism to help the brain process the new information. Grievers might feel shocked and numb at the time. This roughly corresponds with the element Air as the griever struggles to take in new information and create a new reality for themselves which includes the loss, but can’t find a way to express it yet.
• Bargaining — “Just let me live to see my children graduate.”; “I will give my life savings if…” “Why did this happen?”; “I miss them so much.”; “I would give anything to be with them again.”; “I wish I had something tangible to remember them by.” This part of the landscape involves the hope that the individual can somehow postpone or delay their own death. Usually, the negotiation for an extended life is made with a higher power in exchange for something tangible, such as a change in lifestyle. The person wishes for more time with what or who they lost. The corresponding element is Earth, as this area deals with trading one thing for another.
• Depression — “I’m so sad, why bother with anything?”; “I’m going to die . . . What’s the point?”; “I miss my loved one, why go on?” ;“I can barely bring myself to get out of bed.”; “I’m sorry I missed our appointment—I’ve been somewhat distracted lately.” During this stage, the person begins to understand the certainty of death. Because of this, the individual may become silent, refuse visitors and spend much of the time crying and grieving. The person may feel disorientation and disorganization in their general life. It is not recommended to try and cheer up an individual who is in this stage as this may be seen as minimizing their loss. This is the part that people often get stuck on, and must be actively worked through. It corresponds with the element of Water. Some people wallow while others seem to simply cross a bridge. A person may appear inconsolable, but it is important to watch them during this time.
• Acceptance — “It’s going to be okay.”; “I can’t fight it, I may as well prepare for it.”; “This person is gone. It is time to get back to life and pull myself together.” This final stage comes with peace and understanding of the death or loss experience. Generally, this is the goal of the healing process. The griever reorganizes their life with the new information and copes with situations without what they lost. It corresponds with Spirit: the amalgamation of what has been learned to transform the self.
• Guilt – “If only I’d…”; “I shouldn’t have done…” Some people make a detour into guilt. While it is not generally considered to be a universal part of everyone’s healing process, many people spend quite a bit of time here. Guilt is a way for our minds to make sense of what happened, and sometimes it seems like the only explanation—even if it isn’t true. It feels good to have things make sense when so much around us in chaotic. But by its very nature, guilt doesn’t allow us to feel good. It is unhelpful in the healing process.

• Anger — “Why me? It’s not fair!”; “How can this happen to me?”; “Who is to blame?”
  Once in this area, the individual recognizes that denial cannot continue. Their anger can be hard to quell, and may seem never-ending. Grievers may feel like they are being consumed with desire for revenge and may look for scapegoats. They may act out or snap at those dearest to them. This clearly corresponds with the element Fire. The danger is that it will burn out of control and harm others.

This gives us a good map of what to expect when you or someone you love is grieving. Here are a few other things to keep in mind:

• You should always tell a grieving person to take as long as they need to work through their loss. But the truth is that it is harmful for a person to dwell in grief for an extended period of time. You wouldn’t want “Anger” or “Depression” to become a fixed pattern, and we all know what happens when someone gets fixated on revenge. After about three months, the loss should not feel as immediate. By its very nature, grief comes and goes, and ultimately should fade with time. If after six months, the loss still feels like an immediate concern, or you feel depressed or suicidal, seek counseling or call a crisis line.
• While you are grieving, it is a good idea to put off major financial decisions or life changing events. For example, many couples who experience the loss of a child divorce soon after, because in their grief they turn away from each other and remind each other of the loss. Instead of sharing their emotions and being a source of strength for each other, they instead have created another loss: their relationship.
• Grief can begin long before someone dies. When someone becomes very sick, or it is clear the relationship cannot continue, the grieving process may begin.
• Planning for your own death ahead of time can help you deal with your own mortality, and relieve those around you of difficult decisions. Children may not know significant details of their parents’ lives, so help them out by writing your own obituary. Choosing or even paying for your funerary equipment can really help your loved ones give you the send off you want. Consider pre-paying for your casket, and outlining your will. Not only will you help the survivors, but you may learn something about yourself as well.

The truth is that our culture doesn’t deal well with death. Others may be uncomfortable around people who are grieving, as it may remind them of their own unresolved feelings. They may not know how to help. We are told to “get over it” and “pull yourself together”.  The truth is that we never get over the ones we love, we just learn to live without them. When my friend in high school took her own life, I was told to leave the classroom, and spent the rest of the day sitting alone in the library or the nurse’s office. I guess they didn’t want me to upset the others, and I was expected to return to school ready to learn the next day. Unresolved grief can cause severe depression, compulsive behavior such as overeating, and substance abuse as people try to cope with their intense feelings. It may even lead to suicide. Recognizing that grief is a process that must be worked through is essential to healing. You cannot force a grieving person to feel better. You may distract them from their feelings for a time, but they still must be worked through.

As Pagans, we have certain advantages when it comes to dealing with grief. Use your support system. Talk about it. A lot. Talk about it until you have nothing left to say, and if you think of anything else, feel free to talk it over! Remember that those who love you may not know what you need, so tell them in advance. Let them know how they can help you. Some people want and need hugs and physical affection while they grieve, still others would prefer to be left alone until they can process the difficult emotions. Honor the needs of your unique journey through rituals that help you cope. Samhain is an excellent time to do rituals such as tending grave sites, inviting the dead for a dumb supper, creating an ancestor altar or scrap book, or indulging in sad movies and keening. Personally, I work through my issues every year at Sickle: if I am not grieving, I help someone who is.

Remember that theology and spirituality can be very beneficial when you have lost someone dear. For those of us who believe in reincarnation, we know our loved ones are reborn and living new lives and learning new lessons. For others, they will spend time in Summerland resting at the lap of the Goddess. Some lucky few are raised to Valhalla to drink a toast to battles won, and others are invited to the Elysian Fields. If you have the opportunity to ritually travel to the Underworld, do so: it’s hard to be afraid of death when you enter it each year when the veil is thin. Perhaps meet Anubis, Hades or Hel through safe guided meditation to work through your grief. Scheduling time to reminisce about loved ones or think about death helps to keep strong emotions from sneaking up on you, or manifesting in the body as illness.

Ultimately, grief is a process. Accept that a loss may permanently change you, and you will have to adjust to a new “normal”. The Gods never send us more than we can handle, but they expect you to learn what these experiences have to teach you. Take responsibility for your own grieving by telling people where you are, sharing your story, and asking for help. After this article, you will find some phone numbers of people who are trained to help.

Wheel of Hekate, turn turn turn, tell us the lesson that we should learn...

“Today I flow with the river.

I am one with the moon.

I am peaceful and calm.

I forgive myself and everyone else”

-Perry Tilleraas

Grief Resources:

Pet Loss Hotline Hours & Contact Information
Email us at plhl@vetmed.wsu.edu
or call us at 1-(866) 266-8635 or (509) 335-5704
Phone and/or email message can be left for our staff 24 hours a day. Our phones are normally staffed during the semester Monday-Thursday, 7 PM-9 PM and Saturday 1PM-3 PM.

USA National Suicide Hotlines

Toll-Free / 24 hours / 7 days a week

TTY: 1-800-799-4TTY (4889)

Washington State TeenLine
24-hour crisis intervention
Phone: 1-800-562-1240 Phone: 1-877-345-8336 Phone: (206) 722-4222
E-mail: askateen@adhl.org

Citations:

Hipp, E. (1995). Help for the hard times: getting through loss. Center City, Minnesota: Hazelden.

Roberts, B.K. (2002). Death without denial, Grief without apology: a guide for facing death and loss. Troutdale, Or: NewSage Press.

Santrock, J.W. (2007). A Topical Approach to Life-Span Development. New York: McGraw-Hill.