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Blogs about: Painful Rituals

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Funny People... apparently like the penis...1 comment

irqportz wrote 3 months ago: Eugenics, slavery and The Hills.  Yes all things that many Americans have jumped on the bandwagon of … more →

Tags: almost bursting bosom, apocalypse, baby geniuses, Black hole vision, Bladder control, Bruno, choking on it, Circle jerk, Corn and Peanuts

Street Fighter IV, and the new generation of wimpy gamers2 comments

irqportz wrote 8 months ago: Ever since a kid I’ve enjoyed the street fighter series, starting with Street fighter I.  I la … more →

Tags: chuck norris, tekken 5, I was a street brawler, Chop Socky Justice, nuclear contraceptive, Mad Max v Mr. Rogers, Aging gracefully, 1960s feminist, Celeb Gossip

AOL stole my soul for 2 months severance and a frisbee

irqportz wrote 1 year ago: I sit here, now in my 4th, and almost fifth month of unemployment wondering where the hell I went wr … more →

Tags: 5h1t c@nn3d, Burn your bra, Call Center, Canned, Collecting cans, Crack addiction, Dockers boots size 12, Doing lines off a hooker, Drama

Richard Simmons releases controversial sex tape1 comment

irqportz wrote 3 years ago: Yes, it has been a while as portzer #2 points out. So it’s time to get back to business. Today … more →

Tags: male enhancement pills, dingle commentary, Richard Simmons, 2006 MTV Movie Awards, Lionheart, almost bursting bosom, German Chancellor, Bass in my A**, Creepy smiles

What our Readers Want V: A New Hope

irqportz wrote 3 years ago: missle song eat fish WTF!? WTF are you on man…  teh cw As you probably have sadly learned they … more →

Tags: crotch rot, funkonomics, Bladder control, Media retardation, feces, Second Sign of the Apocalypse, Botox bimbo, Crazy, toilet

Whatever you do, don't click this.

irqportz wrote 3 years ago: It’s rare that we come across a gross video that is too extreme, even for us.  This time may b … more →

Tags: feces, basement living, Gnarls Barkley, Ghoulies, toilet, Corn and Peanuts, 2006 MTV Movie Awards, inner peace, Trailer Park

We Gettin' Canned Yo1 comment

irqportz wrote 3 years ago: At one time there was a great deal of speculation concerning AOL layoff rumors. That speculation is … more →

Tags: Tech, AOL, Brad Pitt, Tech Support, Call Center, Shiloh, apocalypse, funkonomics, Sweatshop workers

Diamond in the rough1 comment

irqportz wrote 3 years ago: Dustin Diamond exuding his martial arts prowess Well it turns out the dork of 'Saved by the Bell … more →

Tags: chuck norris, Muay Thai, ninja stealthing techniques, G.I Joe, He-Man, tekken 5, Art of War, I was a street brawler, Wanted dead or alive

Connie Chung and a Little Drinky Drinky2 comments

irqportz wrote 3 years ago: Connie Chung singing a farewall song to her viewers and her career.  Looks like Conni … more →

Tags: apocalypse, Media retardation, Naga Baba, nigh endings, Botox bimbo, Crazy, toilet, malt liquor, Retirement

Trailer Park Ecstasy Lost: The Tale of Britney Spears1 comment

irqportz wrote 3 years ago: Spears was recently seen on The Today show blubbering about the paparazzi not leaving her alone. I d … more →

Tags: male enhancement pills, crotch rot, Media retardation, chimpanzee, Botox bimbo, toilet, Pop tarts, inner peace, malt liquor

Pop Tarts and the Art of War5 comments

irqportz wrote 3 years ago: Well today I went to go toast my pop tarts…. I push the handle down and nothing…  Ok, so … more →

Tags: chuck norris, Muay Thai, apocalypse, Kenny Loggins, ninja stealthing techniques, Pee stain, He-Man, Weird stretching, nigh endings

Naga Babas3 comments

irqportz wrote 3 years ago: We start this post, with a picture. First, you see the Indian actress from Mumbai, India. Behind her … more →

Tags: American Idol, apocalypse, tekken 5, Weird stretching, Naga Baba

This just in.. Jessica Simpson is not hot anymore5 comments

irqportz wrote 3 years ago: I suppose I could talk about the lastest blah blah from Bill Gates toting some new and improved feat … more →

Tags: 2006 MTV Movie Awards, Botox bimbo, Jessica Simpson, male enhancement pills, Media retardation, nigh endings, Richard Simmons, Weird stretching


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