You have to hand it to the guys behind Penny Arcade. What started out as a web comic a decade ago has since exploded to become a full-blown phenomenon that encompasses merchandising, video games and a convention (that tens of thousands of people attend) dedicated to all things “nerd.” You can potentially add reality TV stars to that list as Penny Arcade launched its own web series earlier this week to give fans a sneak peek behind their curtain.

The Penny Arcade guys (co-founders Mike Krahulik and Jerry Holkins) are like the R.E.M. of the nerd world. They appear to have managed their growth without ever blatantly “selling out,” and projects they pursue seem to be of genuine interest to them. Either that or they are insidious masters of disguise. But it’s because of this organic, intentional growth that I was surprised to hear about their new reality show. With people faking child endangerment and supposedly crashing White House parties to get on a reality TV show, why would these two, supposed bastions of integrity want anything to do with the genre?

I wanted to find out a bit more so I emailed Krahulik with some questions. “We thought our readers would enjoy a behind the scenes look at what goes on here at Penny Arcade,” said Krahulik, “How the comic is made, how we pull off PAX, Child’s Play and just day to day life here in the office.”

The episodes are being produced by Two Player Productions and episodes are monetized with a pre-roll ad. Given the popularity of Penny Arcade, I figured that they could at least finagle a deal with G4 or SyFy or some other TV network, but Krahulik said they like the web, “Like most things we do, we like to have complete control over the project,” he said, “There is no reason to deal with a Network if we don’t have to.”

Penny Arcade has dabbled in online video programming before, live streaming Krahulik as he drew a comic strip. But this endeavor is certainly more polished and professional. “PA TV” premiered earlier this week with the pilot episode broken down into two segments. The bulk of the first show takes place at the Penny Arcade Expo (PAX), the duo’s annual convention held in Washington. There’s also a nice peek into how Krahuli and Holkins got started and just a dollop of daddy issues to add some emotional weight.

Indeed.

And no day reflects this evil like the darkest day of the year, Black Friday. Shopping malls turn to lands of desolation, lives are lost (literally) as warring factions set upon the dwindling resources of a forgotten age (bargains).

The question is….

WHY!

I mean what is it about this day that drives the hordes to pillage and plunder as they do?

I can see it from the retailer’s side, they want to make as much money as possible, but what about the consumer?

I guess the clue is in the word, isn’t it? Consumer. It’s Xmas, we have money in our pockets (bonuses) and we have to get little Johny the latest robot and Susy the latest doll. But if it is a question of getting a certain toy, why not order it from a catalog or online? You can do that from the safety of your own home.

But let us not forget the real victims:

Poor Gabe!

And he is right. Yes, store attendants can be snooty little brats who could find their heads in their own asses with both hands and a telescope but when you have to put up with shit like this:

You know what “the back” is? Is the space between the store walls and the actual walls of the mall. Cramped, smelly, cold and crawling with things that where old when the dinosaurs ruled the Earth. Trust me, this is maximum sale time. What you see is what you get. The store will not hold back anything. Who would even try to pull that off when you have the angriest/hungriest mobs this side of Attila the Hun devouring everything in sight? The aloof manner of the average teenage sales clerk is a defense mechanism, my friends! Jaded by countless hours of horror as reality is torn asunder in front of their very eyes (I know, I seen it, I SEEN IT!).Stuff that makes men out of boys, women out of girls and veterans of us all in a matter of minutes.

The greed, my god, the greed.

Of course, the media doesn’t help.

Oh no!

They hype this dark day for a month or so and then feast on the carcasses of the fallen (again literally fallen), the trampled, the dead (I wish I was making up that one, I really do) with stories of specials induced madness and blue light shock and awe.

And what about those vaunted Black Friday savings?

Buy one, get 50% of a second one? Really, that’s like 25% off (which it was the week before) and that’s only if you buy items of the same price.  Plus, factor in the sales tax which cuts into that percentage. On my desk I have a 25% coupon for Borders. It says, and I quote “list price of almost everything!”  Almost? Great!

On second thought….

But not everyone is compelled by this rush to the bottomless abyss of consumption. No, others wait, and wait and wait some more, while every show on radio and television tells us how many days are left till Xmas.

A countdown to another dark day!

Happy Holidays! And stay safe!

Now for some music by Armin van Buuren, Burned with Desire:

Penny Arcade, unequivocally the world’s most popular gaming webcomic, has expanded and branched out beyond any other production of said medium, from selling a variety of merchandise to masterminding the yearly PAX Expo (and now PAX East).

The comic (and everything related to it) is a labour of love, which is made particularly apparent by the pilot episode of Penny Arcade: The Series, an 8-part web series available from their website. The two-part pilot currently stands alone as available for viewing, with two episodes planned to be released per month.  The show is free to view, and follows Mike Krahulik and Jerry Holkins around PAX 2009. At times remarkably touching, these first episodes cover the affection gamers have for the comic after 11 years and the birth of Jerry’s daughter Ronia.

Penny Arcade – PATV

At some point in your life you will be effected by a child. It could be you having a a child yourself, having a niece or nephew, the kids in your neighborhood or hearing a funny story from a co-worker about a child in their life. I am lucky enough to have 3 great cousins and an incredible nephew. My cousin Corey has grown up with Downs Syndrome. He is a great kid but has had to spend a lot of time in the hospital with breathing and heart issues as he grew up. Some of those days were long and hard for him and my family. Corey is a huge gamer and during one his last times in the hospital he had access to video games. Each time I came to see him we would either bring some games to his room or go to the larger game room and play some games, color and just have fun.

You never want to see any member of your family in the hospital but its 100 times worse seeing a young member of your family in the hospital just laying there with nothing to do and nothing to put a smile on their face. If you have gone through a situation with someone young in your family or heard about it from a friend who has you know that you don’t want to see children in the hospital but when they are there you would like to see them happy and smiling. A positive attitude can only help to get some back on their feet.

Since its Christmas time my cousins and my nephew are on my mind all the time. Not being able to wait to see them open their gifts and see the big smiles on their faces. Some kids will be spending the holidays in the hospital though, and if you want to put a smile on their face why dont you give some money to Child’s Play Charity. Child’s Play was set up originally by the guys at Penny Arcade to give video games some good PR. Now its become an incredible charity that brings smiles to tons of kids in the hospital around the holiday season. Go take a look at http://www.childsplaycharity.org/ and see if you can find a gift to give to a hospital in your area or one that may have had an effect on your life and put a smile on a young person’s face. It covers everything kids like, not just video games, so don’t feel you have to be a gamer to help out.

Make some kids Christmas a little happier this holiday.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS

By Hans Wuerflein

As we speak (well, type/read, whatever) four poor, tortured souls are taking part in one of the most arduous tasks in gaming, a multi-day Desert Bus marathon, with no breaks, little sleep (in shifts), and no end in sight.

And it’s all in the name of charity.

Desert Bus for Hope, now in its third annual installment, is a charity drive for Child’s Play, a charity founded by the guys at Penny Arcade that gives video games, toys and money to children’s hospitals around the world.

For those unfamiliar with Desert Bus, a little back story is in order.

Desert Bus is part of the unreleased (but finished) game Penn and Teller’s Smoke and Mirrors for the Sega CD.  The game was a victim of the demise of the failed add-on for the Genesis, and other than a few ads and an early review in a magazine, the world at large didn’t know much about it until just a few years ago.

One of those early review copies found its way to the internet, and by there not really being much of a point in filing copyright claims against distributing a decade old cancelled game for a dead console produced by a now defunct company, it made the usual rounds.

Most of the mini games that make up the two disc set are tricks to play on your friends, but one, Desert Bus, is more of a trick on the player, as well as a little bit of obscure political commentary.

Then Attorney General Janet Reno had come out saying that video games should teach people real life skills.  So, as a response, Desert Bus has players driving a bus at 55 MPH (that veers slightly to the right) on the eight-hour trip from Tuscon, Arizona to Las Vegas, Nevada in real-time.  There are no riders, and if you go off the road, the bus breaks down and is towed back to town, also in real-time.

So, in 2007 Canadian comedy troupe Loading Ready Run (whose site seems to be down at the moment, so here’s a Wikipedia entry) decided that in an effort to raise money for Child’s Play they would keep playing Desert Bus for as long as people would donate money.  They raised $22,805, including donations from Penn and Teller themselves.

The next year, Desert Bus 2: Bus Harder, was an even bigger success, raising over $70,000 over five days.

Well, they’re at it again, and things are off the a great start.  At the time of the writing, they are 30 hours in already and have raised over $28,000.  These donations have guaranteed that they will be driving for at least the next 112 hours (about 4 1/2 days).

So, please, stop by the Web site, watch the live feed for a bit, and donate a few dollars to help sick children (and punish some Canadians).

Regarding http://desertbus.org/

1) It’s all for charidee, to whit, Penny Arcade’s Childs Play.
2) It’s being presented by the chaps/chapesses from LoadingReadyRun.
3) They also do rather amusing skits on the Escapist about Sylvan-Americans.
4) When a certain sparkly vampire flick is beating them for publicity, you REALLY want to make sure that something that makes money for kids beats that foul atrocity, don’t you?
5) C’mon! 4 guys have to play the world’s MOST boring game for 88 hours. That’s worth a donation.

Desert Bus For Hope is a fundraiser for the charity Child’s Play, run by the good folks over at http://loadingreadyrun.com. The first year they raised almost $23 000, and last year they raised over $70 000.

Desert Bus is one of the games on the Sega CD release Penn and Teller’s Smoke and Mirrors, and is said to be the worst and more boring game ever made. The user drives from Tuscon, Arizona to Las Vegas, in real time. The bus cannot go over 45 miles an hour, and you can’t stop. The drive lasts 8 hours. Not only that, but the bus has a slight list to the right, so you have to constantly re-adjust. When you get there, you get 1 point, and have the option to go back. If they crash they have to wait for a tow truck to come, and then tow them back to the start. There is no scenery or curves on the route.

The way Desert Bus For Hope, which started in 2007, works, is that the 4 bussers (who bus in shifts of four hours) bus for as long as people keep donating. The first hour costs $1, and then the cost increases by 7% every time (so that they don’t just drive forever). The event is broadcast live over the internet, at http://www.ustream.tv/channel/desert-bus-drivercam. If you want, you can also see the screen that they’re seeing at http://www.ustream.tv/channel/desert-bus-buscam.

They’ve been featured on TV a few times, and have gained many fans over the three years. It’s a ton of fun to watch, even if you don’t donate, and I suggest you check it out.

Seems like the guys from Penny Arcade have some qualms about the multiplayer aspects of New Super Mario Bros Wii. Which is funny, because I bought this game foremost to play with Linda. I suppose we’ll see come Christmas.

New Super Mario Brothers Wii is marriage poison.

I wouldn’t play this game with any person you want to see again. In its multiplayer interpretation, which I suggest be referred to as “Divorce Mode,” choreographing your platform jumps in a way that does not interfere with another person’s basic game interactions can be quite difficult – particularly in portions where player movement itself can kill teammates while you progress the level, or when the natural scroll of the camera can kill those who lag behind. One of these two things is almost always happening, though. So hm.

That is to say nothing of the proper distribution of powerups, which is a process fraught with concentrated danger.

Det har varit oerhört svårt att missa releasen av Modern Warfare 2 så jag räknar med att till och med din mormor vet vad jag pratar om. Mediasurret kring spelet har varit oerhört oproportionerligt.

Det finns redan många förstapersonsskjutare som fördummar mediet allt oftare än de berikar eller förnyar. Med tanke på att det säkert finns många små gossar som lekt krig när de var små och vill fortsätta med det även i vuxenvärlden så förstår jag varför genren är så populär. Det är helt okej, jag gillar ett bra FPS lika mycket som ett bra rollspel och MW2 som spel sett är nog ett otroligt stabilt bygge. Det ser fantastiskt ut och bättre multiplayer får man nog leta länge efter, men kom igen! Genierna bakom Penny-Arcade illusterade det hela spot on.

Sedan är det ju det där med flygplatsmassakrer. Ruskiga grejer. Det absolut hemskaste som någonsin funnits i ett TV-spel. Om man bortser från alla horor som fått betalt för sex bara för att bli ihjälslagna efteråt i GTA. Eller alla spädbarn som först blivit skullfucked av monster och sedan sönderskjutna i Dead Space. Eller egentligen varenda oskyldig NPC som fått sätta livet till i varenda spel som någonsin gjorts. Skärp er!

Det sorgliga i hela debatten kring denna lilla spelsnutt är att själva shocken i grunden har väldigt lite med våldet i sig att göra. Precis som i verkligheten så skjuts massvis med folk till döds varje dag i spelvärlden. Det är troligtvis amerikanernas enorma behov av att framställa soldater som hjältar (i alla fall de som slåss för hemlandets politik) som ligger bakom shockreaktionen. Soldater har en i grunden ganska enkel arbetsbeskrivning: “skjut den jag pekar på”. I spelets fall ikläder man sig rollen som en C.I.A agent som är undercover i en rysk terroristgrupp. Det är samma arbetsbeskrivning men med en liten twist: “Gör vad som krävs för att vara en del av organisationen och ta del av deras info”. Eller: “Skjut den de pekar på”.

Varför tror folk att C.I.A är rätt picky när det kommer till rekrytering? Som fältagent kommer du att bli ombedd att göra “krävande” saker. Terroristorganisationer är inga fritidsgårdar, du kan inte köpa dig ett medlemskort för att sedan få låna biljardköer och klot när du känner för.

Jag är faktiskt riktigt glad att Infinity Ward har med hela flygplatssekvensen och att Activision inte fegade ur. De är å andra sidan så enormt pengakåta att det kanske vore underligare om de faktiskt hade gjort det. Modern Warfare 2 är ett spel om krig och väpnade konflikter, inte en story om en hjältemodig quarterback från Minesota som är C.I.A-agent och osjälviskt gör världen till en bättre plats. Du kommer att massakrera folk från första till sista minuten i spelet. Det tycks dock vara ansett som sorglös underhållning bara för att dessa är soldater på andra sidan linjen som ändå borde dö.

Att som spelare tvingas att göra vidriga saker istället för att skjuta folk på löpande band med enda motivationen att “de är fiender” är enbart en bra sak. Då kanske man som spelare börjar reflektera över vad man faktiskt gör.

What the fuzz is about:

“…may be disturbing or offensive to some players”. Hyckleri så det är äckligt. Fiktiva soldater har familjer som väntar på dom precis lika mycket som fiktiva civila.

~VIDEO GAME NEWS~

Reggie Fils-Aime unphased by rival motion controls
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Final Fantasy XIII weapon system revealed
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Ninja Gaiden Sigma 2 DLC costume pack
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Fallout MMO screens
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Valve holiday cards
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Get PSPgo for $199
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Activision: Fewer ‘Hero’ titles next year
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Banned and modded Xboxes on Craigslist
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Sony Adhoc PSP Party
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Final Fantasy XIII launches 3.09.2010
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Alan Wake May 2010
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Bobby Kotick $20m richer
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Resident Evil 5 possible on wii
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Mario and Luigi: Partners in Crime
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Man steals 100 copies of Modern Warfare 2 from Gamestop
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Ubisoft working on fighting game, RPG
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October NPDs
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Splinter Cell Conviction to feature in-game ads during torture scenes
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10m xbox sold in UK
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Uncharted 2 sells over 1m
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Ubisoft: Prince of Persia movie to outperform Pirates of Caribbean
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Gamestop to enter digital distribution
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TIME: Natal one of the best invention of 09
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DJ Hero and Assassin’s creed 2 clothes on XBL
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Square Enix announces Lufia Sequel
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Starcraft II expansions and Diablo III in next few years
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Double XP in Age of Conan
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Gearbox on Borderlands 2
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Star Trek Online system requirements
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Facebook integration for PS3
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Natal launch info
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The Bible on your Xbox 360
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Modern Warfare 2 pre-orders pass 3.1m in America
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Modern Warfare 2 sells 1.23m first day UK
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MAG Beta is live
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Possible Bully sequel
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New colors for PSPgo?
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New Xbox 360 wireless network adaptor now on sale
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Super Street Fighter IV network mode info
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Ignition publishing new xbox 360 survival horror game
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GTA: IV Lost and Damned coming to PC?
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Vote for Uncharted 2 multiplayer playlist
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Edios rebranded as Square Enix Europe
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Left 4 Dead 4 vs 4 competitive matchmaking patch
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Bayonetta special edition revealed
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EA frustrated about Wii’s success
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Vagrant Story coming to PSN
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Monopoly hits XBL games on demand
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Netflix PS3 interface won’t change till next year
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Medal of Honor Revitalization to be unveiled soon
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Square Enix hoping for long platform cycle
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2009 Gran Turismo Awards
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No StarCraft II beta till 2010
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Resident evil 5 Alternative edition coming as dLC
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Final Fantasy XIII comes with XIV beta
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Why Left 4 Dead mods can’t run on xbox
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Gearbox CEO: Valve has a “foolish” attitude toward ps3
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Borderlands DLC end of the month
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EA buys Playfish
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EA Cutting 15k jobs as part of ‘Cost reduction plan’
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Activision helps war vets find jobs
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Xbox 360 802.11n wireless adapter appears in UK
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British politician argue over Modern Warfare 2
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Activision trademarks Drum Hero
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New season 1 vs. 100 on XBL
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Penny Arcade launches 2009 child’s play charity drive
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Next Final Fantasy XIII announcement Nov 13
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German Modern Warfare 2 won’t let you kill civilians
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Iwata: 35% JP Connectivity Ratio for Wii, 20% for DS
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Left 4 Dead 2 Pre-load now available
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Visually impaired gamer sues Sony Online
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Iphone dev accused of stealing players iphone numbers
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Cliffy B: Borderlands Diablo of this gen
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Activision not worried about Modern Warfare 2 PC blacklash
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Ah, World of Warcraft.  You have never let me down in the past.  One might even go so far as to say that you are the perfect MMORPG.  You’re fun.  Exciting.  Innovative.  Entertaining.  You succeed where every other MMORPG has failed.

Now, that being said…why hast thou forsaken me, World of Warcraft?  I’ll admit.  I had to quit you for a while.  I got married.  I had a kid.  Life got busy and I had to focus more on work, family, and real life.  But I told you that I would come back…couldn’t you wait for me?

You say I cheated?  I never cheated.  I never even touched you for the entire time I was away…so how could it have been me?

I spoke to Blizzard Technical Support today because I want to get back into World of Warcraft.  A buddy of mine wanted to “bring me out of retirement.”  I was so freaking stoked.  Until when I first tried to log back into my account only to find that it was permanently closed/banned.  Why?  Because, somehow, somebody using my account was caught cheating during my absence from the game.  How is this possible?  You tell me.  I wasn’t there.  I don’t know.

So, I say to the technical support representative (his name was Fabio), “Well, what can be done to reactivate it?”

His response is simply that he will send the account back to be reviewed for possible reactivation…but there is no guarantee.

I say, “Fabio…can’t you make something happen here?  I was the victim of an unfair and unjust crime!  Can’t anything be done.”

He proceeds to tell me that my account getting hacked is my fault/responsibility.  There is nothing he can do.  Fabio doesn’t care about my dilemma.  Blizzard doesn’t care about my dilemma.

I have a bad feeling that my account will not be reactivated.  Blizzard will not show kindness to somebody who has been there since the open beta before the game went live.  They will not give me back that which has been taken away.  And why…because I’m a victim…or because I was mistreated and abused…or maybe because they’re too busy counting their money?

As the following Penny Arcade comic shows, perhaps Blizzard simply can’t help themselves:

I am so upset, right now.  Has anybody else experienced these issues?  Does Blizzard not care about the gamers as they sit upon their throne not made of ice but of money?  Please, gamers, help  me to rise up and bring fairness, justice, and a caring attitude back to World of Warcraft.

Breon W. Guarino

(Wolfgang is not my middle name at all.)

“I’ve enjoyed this greatly. In all seriousness, I am thrilled with the prospect of continuing the process of pulling out the awkward (to my untrained mind), deeply-embedded, and persistent allegories of Spenser’s work. It is deep reading, almost as though one was slogging through a marsh made of candy and deliciousness that one must work for. It is like reading Shakespeare while under the influence of morphine, so utterly beautiful in its Middle English verbosity that it presents a massive buffet of purely enjoyable poetry, the likes of which that has not been seen in centuries, at the least.”

I wish I could say that with a straight face, but it should not be assumed that the accompanying grin is one of mischief. I’m not sure why, but I find a great joy in reading The Faerie Queene. It would not be dishonest to say that I aspire to find a copy and set about reading it myself. It may be some sort of academic masochism that causes this, or perhaps I simply want to be able to hold that accomplishment over the heads of any other English majors that I meet. In any case, I view it in the same way I viewed leveling in LotRO or writing stories.

It is a challenge. After all, it’s pretty rough getting through the convoluted Middle English terminology. There are letter sequences that I do not recognize, but the work of others before me has paved the way towards a slightly more accessible understanding of the material. In a sense, working on The Faerie Queene is like using open-source software, in that the efforts of several people (at least hundreds if not thousands, in the case of The Faerie Queene) have come together to make the original basis more useful to an everyday user that happens across it. It would be a serious personal accomplishment to read through the entirety of it, and there is a certain pleasure to noticing the way that the spoken English language has changed in five hundred years. It’s akin to pillaging the archive of a long-running webcomic and watching as the author develops his or her skills, except that it is AN ENTIRE LANGUAGE that is being developed over the course of CENTURIES. Besides that, a reader can see the perspective of an entirely alien society within the pages. Things have changed since the time period in which the work was made, but the blunt allegory of the poetry was effective in its purposes during its original time, and it makes one wonder about situations and events that could have changed the perspectives of that day to become those of ours.

I would wager that, in the end, I’d say to an IT professional the same thing that I would say to anyone else interesting about reading this work (because I doubt strongly that we would be discussing it otherwise). It’s an interesting piece of work with its own rewards for reading it, it’s proving to be as challenging (or perhaps even more challenging) than I anticipated, and I heartily enjoy that fact to the point that I look forward to continuing it. It is a matter of perspective, and it requires a rather specialized mindset, but it has proven to be highly interesting for me, if nothing else.

As a brief aside first, check out this post at io9, it’s got some good tips for any aspiring writers of fiction (I’m looking at you on this one, Geo). Now, let’s go a bit further down the ol’ rabbit hole, eh?

What we have today is a lil’ list of my favorite webcomics and we’re gonna start with the best and the one I unabashedly stole my title from.

1. xkcd: This one’s been around for eons (in internet years) and still remains funny as hell; assuming, of course, that you get it. And I’m not trying to be condescending here, some of them fly right over my head. But the one’s that don’t, the ones that hit me full on in the face like a bug hitting a motorcyclist without a helmet…those ones are high-larious. It’s made by Randall Munroe, who is awesome and came to ConnectiCon this past year, and it covers pretty much the entire nerd gamut, from science fiction to scantrons to physics and James Bond to the absurdity of life and sooo much more. Though this one gives a pretty fair summarization of his topics. Also, make sure you check out the title-text (aka just hover your mouse over the picture of the comic for a bit).

2. Order of the Stick: Or OOTS for short, has also been around for ages…they’re on #687 at the moment. Now this one’s a little trickier because it’s really only funny if you like “Satan’s Game” (that’s Dungeons and Dragons for all of you not familiar with 8-bit Theater or the Dead Ale Wives, attack the darkness, yo). If you’re that brand of nerd, find this, it’s great.

3. Questionable Content: This one’s not all that nerdy, though there is some serious music nerdiness going on at places, and the author does a separate blog about indie music. It’s mostly about life, some geekery, and relationships…it also occasionally tells you how to defeat the Awkward Zone with the power of frosty brews and fancy suits, which is a little more old-school classy than dressing up for the casino.

4. Penny Arcade: And now we get to the brilliance of Penny Arcade. Their topic changes from comic to comic, much like xkcd, but they’re mostly gamer geeks, much like GU Comics, but better, and more chock full of awesome. And they throw a big ol’ geek convention every year called PAX (Penny Arcade Expo) and next year it’ll be like christmas in March because they’re gonna do two, words cannot express how pumped I am for PAX East in Boston.

5. Least I Could Do: This one’s about sex and it’s hilarious. What more do you need to know? Seriously?

6. The Scout Report: If you don’t play WoW you probably won’t get most of the jokes, and if you don’t know what WoW stands for, then you probably don’t play it. Also in this category is Looking For Group, which started off fairly WoW-esque but has since become its own beast. Also, it’s done by the same people as Least I Could Do, though more violent then sexual, because, well, you know…

7. Qwantz or Dinosaur Comics: Same strip every single day. The same. Every day. The only thing that changes is the dialogue. T-Rex steps on the house and talks to Dromiceiomius and Utahraptor every day. Sound weird? That’s because it is. It’s also brilliant.

8. Transmission-X: This isn’t just one comic, it’s NINE. Kind of a collective publishing and distribution gig, which is cool. It’s also the only one with serious plot lines and such; aside from Princess Planet, they all read much more like graphic novels than something you’d find in the funny papers (unless of course, you count Doonesbury). Check them out, they’re worth the read, especially The Abominable Charles Christopher.

9. PvP: Any gamer can tell you what PvP stands for. Though PvP is more like a geek-obsessed webcomic version of the Office, but funnier.

10. Red vs Blue: RvB started out as a machinima rather than a proper comic, but over the years they’ve expanded out into some really great machinima, some funny as hell live action skits of crap around their office, and a webcomic that brings me back every day to see what manner of drunken x-box craziness they’re up to now.

Some background information for you.

Amazon.com’s Call of Duty-est Town in America promotion features the towns that have the highest percentage of Release-Date Delivery COD:MW2 pre-orders. To calculate, we are using the most recent U.S. Census data for U.S. towns and cities with a population of more than 5,000 people, that have ordered enough copies for two squads (18 people) using Release-Date Delivery. Amazon.com will donate a $5,000 Amazon.com gift card to a charitable organization of our choice that serves the winning town. The winning town will be announced shortly before 12PM PDT on November 10, 2009.

The list of the Top 40 Call of Duty-est Towns in America will be updated on a daily basis allowing fans to track demand for the latest Call of Duty game at Amazon.com.

The list itself is full of interesting cities, ones you never thought of would have a high amount of buyers, but when you think about it, isn’t that surprising. An overwhelming majority of college towns with some military towns thrown in for good measure.

The Top 40 Towns Answering the Call of Duty on Day One

Last Updated: 11:00 AM PST 11/03/09

1. Grand Forks, North Dakota (Yesterday’s Rank: 1) 2. Urbana, Illinois (Yesterday’s Rank: 2) 3. Idaho Falls, Idaho (Yesterday’s Rank: 4) 4. Athens, Ohio (Yesterday’s Rank: 6) 5. Warwick, Rhode Island (Yesterday’s Rank: NA) 6. Norman, Oklahoma (Yesterday’s Rank: 5) 7. Normal, Illinois (Yesterday’s Rank: 8 ) 8. Morgantown, West Virginia (Yesterday’s Rank: 7) 9. Clovis, California (Yesterday’s Rank: 11) 10. Downey, California (Yesterday’s Rank: NA) 11. Puyallup, Washington (Yesterday’s Rank: 9) 12. Leesburg, Virginia (Yesterday’s Rank: 18) 13. Columbia, Missouri (Yesterday’s Rank: 10) 14. Boulder, Colorado (Yesterday’s Rank: 12) 15. Grove City, Ohio (Yesterday’s Rank: 30) 16. Provo, Utah (Yesterday’s Rank: 14) 17. Corvallis, Oregon (Yesterday’s Rank: 13) 18. Stillwater, Oklahoma (Yesterday’s Rank: 3) 19. McKinney, Texas (Yesterday’s Rank: 15) 20. Beaverton, Oregon (Yesterday’s Rank: 32)

21. Twentynine Palms, California (Yesterday’s Rank: 16) 22. Blacksburg, Virginia (Yesterday’s Rank: 33) 23. Waco, Texas (Yesterday’s Rank: 37) 24. Pensacola, Florida (Yesterday’s Rank: 34) 25. Reno, Nevada (Yesterday’s Rank: 25) 26. Fort Lauderdale, Florida (Yesterday’s Rank: 24) 27. Santa Clarita, California (Yesterday’s Rank: 27) 28. Vero Beach, Florida (Yesterday’s Rank: 23) 29. Auburn, Alabama (Yesterday’s Rank: 31) 30. Clearwater, Florida (Yesterday’s Rank: 28) 31. Coral Gables, Florida (Yesterday’s Rank: 29) 32. College Station, Texas (Yesterday’s Rank: 20) 33. Des Moines, Iowa (Yesterday’s Rank: 21) 34. Oxnard, California (Yesterday’s Rank: 22) 35. Ames, Iowa (Yesterday’s Rank: 19) 36. San Rafael, California (Yesterday’s Rank: 17) 37. Naples, Florida (Yesterday’s Rank: NA) 38. Broomfield, Colorado (Yesterday’s Rank: NA) 39. Olathe, Kansas (Yesterday’s Rank: NA) 40. Temecula, California (Yesterday’s Rank: 40)

Quite a few Florida places show up on the list. Pensacola is no big shocker as it is the “Cradle of Naval Aviation” (the National Museum of Naval Aviation is located at the Pensacola Naval Air Station, home of the legendary Blue Angels). I honestly don’t know why Clearwater is on the list other than a Coast Guard Air Station, so I am just going to guess all the Scientologists like Call of Duty. You heard it here first folks. Coral Gables is actually a surprise for me for only ranking 31. I figured more of the UM frat boys would be in on this. Rounding out the list is sleepy town Naples.

The Nightlife

Statistics like this make me wonder how the county would’ve ranked as a whole. Coral Gables is tiny compared to the vast swaths of Kendall, Hammocks, Miami proper and unincorporated Dade. Also fun to note is the system breakdown. Another no surprise is the 360 with 61% while the PS3 has 31% and PC trailing in the distance with 8%. I wish I could see a time line with sales data pre and post dedicated server gimping announcement. Would be nice to see if there was a cause and effect action there.

Penny Arcade aptly sums up the Windows 7 experience.

-JM

By Noel Bagwell
October 31, 2009

© 2009 Mike Krahulik and Jerry Holkins || http://www.penny-arcade.com

While watching the World Series, I saw the trailer for the new Twilight New Moon movie that’s due out November 20^th, and it reminded me of something Jerry Holkins, of Penny-Arcade! fame, said.

By any reasonable barometer, any metric, by any comprehensive schema of assessment, undeath is this nation’s chief export. We deal it out globally, all the while surfing metabolically on the strange fumes of its production. Thus, in direct violation of the Ten Crack Commandments, we’re getting high on our own supply. And the resultant product is getting pretty thin.

If the work of our kind can be contained by a chart, The Vampire Diaries must certainly represent some kind of inverse apex; a negachievement which nullifies human progress. Imagine a Buffy the Vampire Slayer where there was no Buffy, and vampires are rarely slain. All you’ve got left is “The,” and Sally, that ain’t no kinda show.

We need to chart new territory, and I don’t mean we as in you and I, or we as in gamers, or even Americans. I mean that Gabriel and I need to chart new territory, so that we can become incredibly wealthy – plowing up some shambling new corpse to bind in service. Consider our bet placed.

Jerry (aka “Tycho”) makes a great observation. It seems that everywhere you turn, and not just this time of year, you find some sort of undeath. Zombies, vampires, mummies, ghosts, ghouls and more have infested our culture. This is nothing new, from an anthropological perspective, of course. People have been fascinated with death and life beyond it since the first human being died. That fixation doesn’t show any signs of waning.

It remains an interesting observation, though, that the United States has an entire Undeath Industry that exports a large volume of product globally, not to mention the amount of product it pushes domestically. I’m not sure Mummies are the new wave. In fact, it seems to be werewolves (a la the Underworld franchise and the Anita Blake novel series). So, Tycho, I’ll take that bet, and raise you a cultural fad that I hope fades before it becomes a full-fledged trend.

Como um bom nerd de carteirinha sempre estive a par de todos os “Fantasy Trends“ possíveis, li diversos livros, estudei varias raças, perdi meu tempo aprendendo elfico e um pouco da lingua Drow também.

Ser um nerd jogador de rpg vai além do comum, ler livros como “Senhor dos Anéis” é apenas o começo, um verdadeiro nerd conhece os dragões da série “Eragon” e as fadas de “Artemis Fowl”, conhecer os terrenos e continentes de Final Fantasy e ter mapas guardados das dungeons que frequentou.

 Parece um exagero mas é algo mais comum do que se imagina, um nerd deve saber reconhecer o valor das coisas legais, afinal, quem não gostaria de ter uma das armas dos Capuleto do filme “Romeu e Julieta” moderno, aquelas armas prateadas, com desenhos e tudo mais, conhecer o sobretudo preto do “Blade” que depois foi copiado pelos chatos de “Matrix”.

A questão é a seguinte, diversas modas apareceram durante os anos, no inicio do jogo “Everquest” os drows fascinaram muitos nerds que os desconheciam, Senhor dos Anéis trouxe loucuras por espadas, orcs, D&D e Elfos, “Buffy, a trepa caça vampiros” fez moda com armas bacanas e adversários fortes, mas tudo isso manteve um certo respeito a essas “culturas” e trouxeram inovação, sem estragar a fantasia.

 A nova mode de vampiros, que teve o seu começo com aqueles livros sobre a familia de vampiros bicholas vegetarianos (hahahahahahaha) e romances sem fim, vampiros tristes, traumatizados, emos e sem nenhuma determinação. O que aconteceu com a principal (e mais legal) caracteristica dos vampiros? A força misturada a superioridade, com um conhecimento acumulado devido a sua imortalidade, orgulho e prazer, onde foram parar os bons vampiros?

Eu torço para que essa moda termine logo, que os vampiros recuperem um pouco de sua dignidade para reaparecerem no futuro, enquanto isso surgem diversas novas idéias, o pessoal do Penny Arcade vota em Mumias, e existem diversas outras opiniões, fantasmas, deuses gregos, novos guerreiros fantasiosos.

Eu mantenho o meu voto, eu voto em Zumbis para o próximo Fantasy Trending! Próximo ano vão ter romances, filmes de ação, drama, comédia e até pornex, tudo com zumbis! Afinal, se um vampiro pode ser Vegetariano, porque não um Zumbi Bad Boy popular?!

I was going to do a little twitter post about what I’d buy if I “won the lottery”, but I am greedy and spoiled and it would take WAY more than 140 characters to list it all.

Mostly, I just wanted to post a link to a pair of Demonia shoes that I covet.  If you want to take a look, they are listed under “Demonia Women’s Goth,” scroll down about 12 rows: Demonia Women’s Platform Mary-Jane with Skulls: Gothika 09.  Anyways, it turns out that even if I had unlimited funds, I would not be able to order these babies… apparently, they don’t come in my size.

This has been an ongiong issue for me.  My feet are not enormous, I know there are women out there with even bigger feet than I have, but I cannot buy shoes in a regular shoe store.  Ever.  I used to try to find shoes in my size, but it was a frustrating and ultimately fruitless process.  It involved going from shoe store to shoe store and asking if they had anything in a women’s 11.  ANYTHING?  I know people who get to walk in the store and browse through the displays and pick a shoe they like and then ask if that shoe comes in their size.  When you have feet that are either smaller or larger than the “average” which apparently is sizes 7-9, then you don’t get to buy shoes based on the style.  Sometimes, you don’t even get to buy a pair at all.  In the end, I gave up entirely.  I just go to Payless where they always have shoes in my size.

Next up on my wish list: at least a dozen of the t-shirst available for purchase from ThinkGeek.  I have a wish list there, but it is incomplete because my browser keeps crashing when I try to view all the items in a particular category.  I am able to view individual items, and then follow links to other items people who bought that item also bought.

Speaking of t-shirts, there’s also a bunch at Penny Arcade Store that I want – I was going to say need, but that’s not technically accurate.  Back in the olden days, when Penny Arcade merch was sold at ThinkGeek, I did purchase a few.  I had a CTS men’s tee in XXXL that I used as a nightie.  I also had the Gabe and Tycho babydoll tees, but I outgrew them – if you read my blog, this shouldn’t surprise you.

There are so many things on Etsy that I would buy that it would take a lifetime to post links to all of them.  [Insert long dissertation on the awesome creative talent out there and how great indie artisans are and how awesome it is to be able to shop such a huge variety of one-of-a-kind hand-made treasures from the comfort of my livingroom.]

I guess I’d also go totally crazy buying supplies for all my arts and crafts pursuits.  Fibers for knitting and crochetting.  Paper, punches, ribbons, brads, stickers, rub-ons, stamps, ink, pastels, markers, etc etc etc for card-making.  Heck, since this is MY fantasy, I’ll throw in a sewing machine AND a serger and start making my own awesome one-of-a-kind hand-made clothes.

JMar really wants a Dodge Charger.

Of course, I don’t actually play the lottery, so I guess my odds of winning are significantly reduced as a result.  The truth is that I could easily “save up” for most of the items on my list – except the shoes, since they don’t come in my size.

By Hans Wuerflein

Sunday started with the semifinal round of the Omegathon, Connect 4.  They’ve traditionally done board games in the past, most notoriously Jenga.

They had a 10 second timer on to keep things moving.  I guess they learned their lesson a few years ago with a Jenga that took something like an hour and a half.

Anyway, the guy who got in by being in second place was one of the two to move on to the still secret final round.

Next we went over to check out the public demo of Star Wars: The Old Republic.  In case you haven’t been following it, it’s a Star Wars MMORPG being developed by BioWare (the developers of Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic) for release some time next year.

They had several guys in full costume as Jedi walking around before they got the presentation started.

Now, I’m sure those of you with some photography experience are wondering why I didn’t use flash, because lets be honest, despite that being a cool picture, it’s a little blurry.  Here’s why:

They’re lit internally and made of fairly reflective plastic, so it looks more like he’s holding part of a curtain rod than a lightsaber.  Plus you miss out on that little bit of really cool looking motion blur.

Anyway, the game looks absolutely amazing.  I was leaning toward getting the game already.  Then I heard the following:

“People have asked us, ‘Are you going to do a KotOR 3?’  Yes. And a 4, and a 5, and a 6, and they are this game.”

(Note: It’s been a few weeks and I can’t remember who exactly from BioWare was speaking at the time,  so if you are somehow reading this, sorry, and if anyone else remembers, please tell me.)

The demo they showed off looked like essentially a multiplayer KotOR, in that it actually had a strong storyline.  I was really impressed that it used the dialog system from Mass Effect, and like Mass Effect, the choices you make will have a lasting impact on the storyline and its missions.  It’s good to see an MMO have missions more complex than ‘I need 12 pelts/horns/magic doo-dads.’

They showed off four of the classes, two good, to evil.  Well, there’s some gray area there, but I digress.  On the “good” side you had the Jedi and Trooper.  Yes, the Troopers are good, because it’s way in the past of the Star Wars universe, and these are different, non-clone, non-storm troopers, so just go with it.

On the “evil” side you have the Sith and the Bounty Hunter.  Again, I’m not sure that Bounty Hunters are necessarily evil, but they’re in it for the money, and money is the root of all evil, so shut up, they needed a close counter to the other guys with lots of guns.

I can’t wait to see the rest of the classes.

They had a couple treats for the audience, most notably an inside joke.

I saw a few good cosplays walking around that afternoon.  First, there were these guys, who were great, but I have no idea who they were supposed to be.  If anyone knows, feel free to comment.

Also, there was a pretty good, but thankfully not entirely in character, Pyramid Head from Silent Hill 2.

Also, while waiting in the VIP line for Wil Wheaton, and yes, there were so many people trying to get in that the people who normally got to cut had to get in their own, separate line, I made quite possibly the most important discovery of our time: I found Waldo.

Anyway, I went to a couple more panels, including one about the quality of video game reviews hosted by a bunch of industry vets, full of great stories.  For example, while discussing integrity and whether or not it is necessary to do every little thing in every game you review, one guy talked about how a former writer for his site once docked Max Payne a couple points in his review because he didn’t like the multiplayer.  Max Payne has no multiplayer.  I think you can see the problem here.  That’s why I refered to him as a former writer.

I also checked out the second Penny Arcade panel.  There were more great questions from the audience, but two things in particular stand out.

First a swarm (?) of Boo(s) attacked.

One guy went up to the mic and asked them to close their eyes while a group of fans with boo masks crept up to the stage.  They did a great job with it, and even tried to “hide” when Gabe and Tycho looked at them.

Second, during the previous panel they had talked briefly about weird, homoerotic fan art of their characters people have drawn.  Well, this time around someone had some of it with them:

I love Tycho’s reaction in this shot.  Right after this Gabe said he was going to sign it across ‘his junk’ and Tycho freaked out a little.

“Don’t sign it!  Now it’ll go on eBay as an original!”

After the Penny Arcade panel a couple of us went over to check out “Wil Wheaton presents: THE AWESOME HOUR!!1″  And yes, like I mentioned before, there was such a demand for seats that in addition to the Super Best Friends Club VIP line they actually had to use the main line up area and shepherd people over.

Even though we had to wait in line, our seats were great:

Wil’s performance/speech/show thingy was fantastic.  He told several stories from the books he’s written, Just a Geek and Dancing Barefoot as well as part of his keynote address from PAX ‘07.  He talked about his first trip to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show, an embarrassing diner at Black Angus, and how the NES was probably the most powerful computer ever made.

This next picture really is just to show the level of admiration this man has within the geek community:

Yes, panties were thrown.

He also fielded questions from the crowd, and most of them were great, but one in particular stands out.

Godfather of Nerdcore hip-hop, self-proclaimed 579th greatest rapper on Earth, and Penny Arcade Rapper Laureate MC Frontalot.

He and Wil did a bit they worked on for one of Frontalot’s albums.  Really, here, just watch:

Sunday evening was the grand finale of PAX, so everyone headed back to the main event room to see the final round of the Omegathon.  Once again, I got to cut, and this time I drug the whole group along with me.  Here’s the final line:

Most of the other Omegathon rounds had maybe 40 people in the room, with the exception of the round right before Saturday’s concerts.  This one had thousands, and with good reason.  There’s the tension of still not knowing what they’re going to play.  There’s the tension of watching two of your fellow gamers compete for a great prize, with the loser only getting an invite to try again next year.  Then there’s the fact that there really isn’t anything else going on at that time and it’s the official end of PAX, so really, where else are they going to be?

We got in early, but sat back a ways to get actual seats.  Everyone else filled in in front of us, but several of us still had sore feet from the concert the night before, so there was no way we were standing up for another hour.

Everyone was still talking about what the final game would be.  And really, it can be anything.  They did Vs. Excitebike the year before, a game that only came out in Japan for the Famicom Disk System (a floppy disk drive add-on for the Japanese NES).

During the build up to it Gabe and Tycho mentioned that they had done just about every type of game for a final round, but that they wanted to take it back to the arcade.  The crowd buzzed with anticipation.  What could it be?

Skeeball?  Really? Yes really.

Finalists had to square off in a score competition for the trip to Tokyo on what turned out to be the single crappiest functioning Skeeball machine in the world.

Seriously, the kept breaking down so often during the competition that they had to keep score by hand.

After several rounds, last year’s runner up finally…lost.  Again.  Better luck next year guy.   Really though, you’re getting three years of line cutting privileges out of this.  Don’t knock it. Let’s just hope you don’t turn into the early ’90s Buffalo Bills of the Omegathon.

Well, that pretty much wraps things up.  It was one of the most incredible experiences of my life, and even though I got pwned out of the Omegathon so early, I really can’t wait to go back.  Maybe a trip to Boston for the new PAX East…

I’ll read over these again and post anything I missed, plus some stuff from sightseeing in Seattle the next morning before our flight home later this week.