…and who’s that there behind the penultimate calendar door? Why, it’s only our old pal ‘Dinners’, with a special surprise…

Good news from the BBC on collaborations between Gary Numan and Little Boots and Heaven 17 and La Roux!

Heavenly Live Combos

It does make me happy to see a new set of synthpop acts not only become so successful but to give great respect to the pioneers in the field who made the music happen!

Little Boots already collaborated with Phil Oakey of the Human League on her debut album, by the way, with the excellent track “Symmetry.”

What lovely warm weather we’re having at last! Even Feydeau’s taken off his waistcoat. Although he still won’t say goodbye to his loon pants.

Anyway, there I was taking the wee fella for his morning constitutional on Saturday, strolling past Crouch End library, when who should I chance across en masse outside the public toilets but 80s glam poppers The Human League. Honestly, those lovely hair-dos and that fluorescent make-up still look stunning, even on the girls.

“Hello Human League!” I said, punching the air and nearly strangling poor Feydeau. “Ellor,” they replied in their lovely Yorkshire accents. “Eh-oop, get t’ name right, Hugor,” said grumpy singer Phil Oakey. “It’s T’ Human League. T’ definite article’s reet important you knor.”

“So what are you all doing here?” I asked, over Feydeau’s constant barking. “Are you looking for some Love Action?” “Well nor,” chirped backing singer Jo (now a chunky mum to triplets thanks to a clinic in Europe), “Phil ha’ dropped t’ hat and we’re all tryin’ to find it.” I pointed to the pavement in front of them. “But it’s right there,” I said. “And it’s even got a few coins in it.” “Oh aye, ta,” they all said in unison.

“Na, pretha, barn, mak heaste an’ gang,” added Phil. “He stack his shak-fork up i’ t’ esins.”

Eee by gum! Genius works in wondrous ways.

Heigh-ho,

Hugo

Phil Oakey, English singer (The Human League)

I'm still looking for old pictures from that time when it wasn't odd to see some people in trench coats or leather jackets in the middle of the day(even summertime) but temporarily this will do,for now. A bit more general, with the preppy, pastel color galore 80's Menudo kind of look than the dour European New Wave visual. It does remind me of current trendy bands though, both local and international. mismatched Chucks, skinny jeans. Ahh, the cycle in music and fashion. What goes around comes around. Scary.

Chong
both noun and adjective
An 80’s term of endearment by local punks for new wavers.

Punk1-Huh?Pupunta kang party sa Corinthians? Puro Chongs doon no!

Punk2-di bale Positive Noise yung mobile, nagpapatugtog yon ng “Damaged Goods” at “Wild in The Streets”, pwede na rin!

If Britain had Mods versus Rockers, well then, here in the fabulous 80s there was the amusing Punks versus Chongs division. It wasn’t as bad as one would imagine though and wasn’t even close to the stupidity behind the Rock versus Hip Hop call for arms in the 90s. It was just a loving, slight derogatory term placed upon people who were into New Wave by the local Johnny Rottens and the Sid Vicious’ of the day like they were better because they listened to something harder,noisier, chaotic and rebellious.

I was actually both, a hybrid. I enjoyed Circle Jerks as much as i enjoyed The Lotus Eaters but being that i’m from a different background and didn’t sport a mohawk nor wore a dog collar with rusty nails protruding, i was definitely referred to as a “chong”.

It wasn’t something bad to me nor did i take offense to it. I’m not going to deny i was more into the cool demeanor of a Tim Butler(bass player and brother of Richard-Psychedelic Furs), Martin Fry of ABC, the quirky Mark Hollis of Talk Talk and moreover, the unabashed, fey swagger of David Sylvian (Japan). Heck, at one point i even sported Phil Oakey’s(Human League) lopsided hairdo. This sense of style appealed more to me than having to put egg yolk on my hair to make it stay up and spikey though from time to time i would be caught wearing PVC trousers,(or something close to it), something narrow and plaid or something with loads of buckles and zippers tucked in a pair of U2 or The Alarm looking boots. Not just for the weekend mind you, but more for school, partnered with the school polo uniform, shirtjack style.

However, seeing Paul Weller in a white trenchcoat, Fred Perry sport shirt with drainpipe trousers and loafers seemed to connect with me more and that’s where the “mod” posturing came about. But to most i was a “chong”.

Still, the group of mobile friends i was with then and i were probably the only ones who could get away playing Hardcore/Ska and Punk/New Wave/Post-Punk altogether. Ex. D.O.A, The English Beat ,The Fall, Dead Kennedys, Seona Dancing (Ricky Gervais) and The Fire Engines etc., side by side for a Punks not Dead party or a trench coat wearing (96 degrees in the shade), allblack,eyelinerheavy,The Cure lookalike soiree. I’ve certainly had my fair share of beer bottles whizzing by, being spat at and given the finger by groups of Punks, and all this, while playing their favorite Minor Threat song or the never fail “Sex and Violence” by The Exploited.

But yeah, still in the configuration i was a considered a “chong” and i was, for the most part. But, was i really one in the Industry “State of The Nation” sense? Check for yourselves and decide whether i was a permanent fixture at the Corinthian club house or whether i have New Wave pedigree and an indie cred… from a sample of records in my arsenal. Click HERE

While the subject’s on New Wave here’s one of the best bands from the 80s in my book. Critically acclaimed yet criminally misunderstood by most.

Yes, you heard correctly. Mark Hollis was singing live over the minus one for this simple video directed by then wonder boy Tim Pope. There is another version of this video btw. The other two, Paul Webb and Lee Harris went on to form O’rang and if i’m not mistaken Paul Webb collaborated with Beth Gibbons under Rustin Man. Sadly, Mark Hollis, after putting out a wrist slasher of a solo effort in the same vein as the last two Talk Talk albums has retired completely from the music business. He should make a comeback. Their last two albums Spirit of Eden and Laughing Stock are considered by many music fans and critics alike as the progenitor of “Post Rock”.

For another excellent Talk Talk video click HERE.

Four performance that I will be keeping an eye on during Sheffield’s upcoming music festival

So the Music in the sun website has gone live, along with the usual MySpace plus Facebook fan and event pages. A few of the acts have caught my eye, and at just £9.50 for a two-day advance ticket, it seems good value.

However, it is frustrating that the line-up doesn’t specify when many of the bands are actually playing over the weekend. The arena performers seem to be better mapped out, but being more of an indie fan, it would be helpful to have a proper running order for the main stage on each day, too. Perhaps nearer the time this information will be made available.

It is good to see some local acts represented on bill. Here are some of the performers I will be looking out for:

Kings Have Long Arms
Described by Wikipedia as ‘rocktronica’, this Sheffield-based act has been around for a few years and collaborated with several well-known musicians including Phil Oakey (the Human League), Mira (Ladytron), Andy Rourke and Mike Joyce (former Smiths), Denise Johnson (A Certain Ratio) and Ray Dorset (Mungo Jerry). The excellent single Big umbrella (featuring Candie Payne) was released at the beginning of the year:

Tiny Dancers
Another Sheffield-based group, this indie-country-rock band signed to Parlophone in 2006 and last summer released their debut album, Free school milk. Their singles have had some airplay and entered the top 40 but they are yet to have a major breakthrough hit. This is the catchy and upbeat I will wait for you:

Levi Roots
If you watch Dragon’s Den, the you will know about Levi Roots’ (real name Keith) appearance in the last series of the show, where he was awarded money to produce Reggae Reggae Sauce. By the looks of things, he was a musician prior to this so he should definitely be considered more than just a novelty at Music in the sun. And if his performance successfully captures any of the charm and charisma that came across on television then we should be in for a treat. This is Reggae reggae sauce (the song) on Dragon’s Den:

Artery
If you listened to the recent BBC Radio 2 documentary in which Jarvis Cocker took listeners on a tour of Sheffield (still available to listen to here) then you would have heard 70s/80s post-punk band Artery being mentioned, as the former Pulp frontman was a big fan. Although they didn’t have any big hits, the band are seen as one of the big influential Sheffield bands from the time and reformed in 2007. This is John Peel’s favourite song, and by far their most well-known track, Into the garden:

The Artery and Tiny Dancers MySpace pages say that they are each playing on 2 August, so hedge your bets it will be the Saturday for those two bands.

computers ruled 1984. even i had one. my parents bought me an acorn electron for educational purposes and i spent the next four years playing bbc versions of arcade games. pac-man became ’snapper’, donkey kong was ‘boxer’ and frogger was ‘hopper’.

my personal favourites were chuckie egg and burgertime. you couldn’t get burgertime for the acorn electron so i had to play it in arcades. chuckie egg was available for the electron but it didn’t work. you’d sit through about five minutes of alphanumeric screeching and then, no chuckie, no egg.

then there were the fabulously basic text adventure games. ’sphinx adventure’. literally -

you cross the bridge. there’s a carrot.

>eat carrot.

you can see in the dark!

yes, really. and if you were a little brat like me…

you cross the bridge. there’s a carrot.

>shit

what is ’shit’?

download here

apollonia 6 - blue limousine

autumn – computer touch

billy ocean – syncopation

confection – put me on your playlist

duran duran – the reflex

klymaxx – video kid

midnight star – body snatchers

new edition – cool it now

phil oakey – together in electric dreams

pointer sisters – automatic

shannon – sweet somebody

wham – credit card baby

i didn’t watch ‘life on mars’. it was set in 1973 and well, i wasn’t born then and i’d heard, after the first few episodes, that the nostalgia played a big part in the experience. (I’ve since watched it and LOVE it, and john simm is amazing).

so when i heard about ‘ashes to ashes’ the 80s sequel, i decided that i would watch this time. now it’s set in 1981, and my memories of that year are mostly confined to button moon and hazy royal wedding memories, but it’s interesting to see how people actually lived like that in my lifetime.

the scenes in the new romantic hangout, the blitz club were an eyeopener. i thought the 90s club scene was so different that bar studio 54, clubland had previously been about carpeted walls, disco lights and mirrors. no edge, nothing extraordinary,no innovation. i was SO wrong. the music makes more sense now – i used to wonder how people ever danced to new wave but i get it now. 1981 looks bleak, but it was also real, and probably felt like being on a rollercoaster. I think the blitz eventually became the gardening club, in covent garden.

i would have liked to hear these tracks from 1981 in the show. plus the roxy music track which was the outro to episode one - it took me until last week to figure out what it was.

so what for the next series? can’t believe we have to wait till 2009…

download here

abc – poison arrow

chaka khan - i know you, i live you

grace jones – pull up to the bumper

haircut 100 – love plus one

hall and oates – rich girl

human league – don’t you want me

kraftwerk – the model

level 42 – love games

police – every little thing she does is magic

odyssey – inside out

roxy music – same old scene

scritti politti – sweetest girl

Utter class…

Listen to that amazing synth underscore.

Very like “the Black Hit of Space’ by The Human League in places.

See what I mean.  This mash up totally rocks.  One of HL’s greatest song from their joint best album (Travelogue – the other is Reproduction – Fuck Dare)

The very latest from the super, soaraway Stir!

Sheffield Steelers have just revealed that Nottingham NHS begged the
parents of Sean Bean, Phil Oakey, Joe Elliott, Jarvis Cocker and all the
Arctic Monkeys to give birth to their children at either City Hospital
or QMC but they all refused. Mrs Bean gave this exclusive statement to
Dave Simms “I’m sure Nottingham is a nice place and the offers of
birthing drugs and after care were pretty impressive but I knew that
there was only ever going to be one place where my son would be born and that was the Royal Hallamshire.”

In other news organisers have announced that the 2009 British Turd Polishing Championships will be held in Sheffield. The competition chairman said Sheffield got the nod after he was impressed with the way that Sheffield Steelers fans tried to justify the signing of Jeff Hutchins. The event will be held at Sheffield Arena every Saturday during the hockey season!

Gisteren was er de officiële release van de debuutcd van Victoria Hesketh aka Little Boots. Een meer dan prettige doortocht bij ‘Later with Jools Holland’ en getipt als één van de (mogelijke) muzikale revelaties voor 2009. Dan zijn de verwachtingen natuurlijk terecht hooggespannen. Ze stond oorspronkelijk op de affiche van Polsslag, maar dat optreden ging door omstandigheden niet door. Ik hoop stilletjes nog een beetje op Pukkelpop.

‘Hands’ trapt af met de huidige nieuwe single ‘New in town’, een heel catchy nummer dat onmiddellijk blijft hangen. ‘Earthquake’ doet me dan weer een beetje denken aan het Scandinavische popnimfje Annie. Ook dat is een compliment want het nummer klinkt redelijk fris. ‘Stuck on repeat’ was volgens mij het allereerste dat ik ooit heb gehoord van Little Boots. Wel jammer dat ze een radio-edit op de cd hebben gezet, want het origineel duurde bijna 7 minuten en was in mijn ogen een stuk krachtiger.

‘Click’ vind ik persoonlijk het minst goeie nummer van de cd. ‘Remedy’ is dan weer iets speels voor op de dansvloer. Licht verteerbare brok popmuziek. Waarna alweer een hoogtepunt volgt dat ‘Meddle’ heet. Hierin wordt, net zoals in enkele andere nummers trouwens, gebruik gemaakt van een Japans high-tech speelgoedje, de Tenori-on. ‘Ghosts’ is ook een knap experimenteel stukje muziek. ‘Mathematics’ is dan weer een electropopdeuntje volgens de beste traditie. ‘Symmetry’ had iets van Kylie Minogue kunnen zijn vind ik. Vocaal wordt ze hier trouwens ondersteund door Phil Oakey, zanger van The Human League. Giorgio Moroder is m.a.w. nooit ver uit de buurt.

‘Tune into my heart’ bewijst opnieuw dat de meest memorabele poppareltjes makkelijk in drieënhalve minuut gebald raken. Vreemd genoeg klinkt het zelfs een beetje als Human League maar dan met Kylie Minogue vocals. ‘Hearts collide’ is prachtige synthpop waarna de reguliere cd eindigt met ‘No brakes’. Naar het schijnt staat er nog een fantastische ‘hidden track’ op, ‘Broken heart’, een persoonlijke en nogal donkere pianosong die wordt vergeleken met Adele. Helaas heb ik ‘m niet gehoord.

Wat mij betreft een zeer fijn cd’tje, dat waarschijnlijk het best gedijt in de huiskamer en op hippe radiozenders. Little Boots werkte voor deze cd o.a. samen met mensen die voorheen ook al achter de knoppen zaten bij Lily Allen en Hot Chip en ze heeft wellicht ook een beetje de mosterd bij Madonna gehaald. Maar daar hoort u ons allerminst over klagen. Zou ik dit cd’tje nu warm aanbevelen aan vriend of vijand? Vast én zeker! Victoria Hesketh is nog maar 24, maar ze heeft nu al een mooie toekomst voor zich wat mij betreft. Liefhebbers kunnen trouwens op haar blog terecht.

UPDATE

Het wordt een mooie Pukkelpopeditie dit jaar. Little Boots speelt dit jaar op zaterdag 22 augustus op Pukkelpop.

Things have been pretty quiet on the Phil Oakey/Human League front but suddenly he’s utterly ubiquitous. First he shows up on a bonus track on Pet Shop Boys’ new album (“This Used to be the Future”), and now he guests on the aforementioned Little Boots album, Hands, on a track called Symmetry (album to drop next week). Nice to see ‘ol Phil out and about. Human League’s input became less and less meaningful over the years (and they never fully recovered artistically from the debacle that was “Human”), but one can never forget the band released two of the most important electronic albums of all time (Reproduction and Travelogue), and pumped out classics from “Don’t You Want Me” to “The Lebanon” to my favourite, “(Keep Feeling) Fascination” throughout the 80s. Softsynth is already pumped for the Little Boots album, now even more so…

Listen:

Muy lejos ya del electro-punk gonzo de Six Finger Satellite, Juan Maclean se encarama a los tacones del disco y se lanza a la piscina del hedonismo. Bajo el signo de la sacra DFA y tomándole el testigo a sus camaradas de Hercules & Love Affair, el grupo lo forman hoy el señor John, los dos miembros de Holy Ghost!, Gerry Fuchs de !!! y Nancy Whang, quien pone voces en casi todo el álbum dándole la réplica a Juan cual Susan Sulley a Phil Oakey. El hombre que se definió como “el único capaz de imaginar un triángulo amoroso entre un hombre, una mujer y un robot gay amigo del hombre”, firma junto a todos ellos un disco ácido, musculado, extrañamente introspectivo y muy erótico, pero también delatado desde su título por una impronta tautológica y sarcástica que no siempre le favorece.

Pecando en ocasiones de un mimetismo peligroso, “The Future Will Come” se acerca demasiado a The Human League y a los popes del sello neoyorquino (LCD Soundsystem). Se advierte nada más empezar “The Simple Life”, un gran tema que juega a ser “Get Innoucuous!” mientras le roba la línea melódica al “Love Action” de “Dare”. También se dan cita Giorgio Moroder, Larry Heard y Boney M, quienes se piropean y se meten mano unos a otros en una orgía homérica coronada por el cierre inmortal de la conocida “Happy House”. De los nuevos temas que no conocíamos -los más cortos- llama la atención una inesperada balada (“Human Disaster”) y esa serpiente selvática a punto de inocular el veneno que es “Accusations”. A base de cencerros sibaritas, teclados en libertad y bajos siliconados, el álbum arrastra un acabado tan dichosamente ‘coolness’ que algunos podrían tachar de barato (“One Day”).

“Im gonna take you out tonight 

Im gonna make you feel alright
I dont have a lot of money
But we’ll be fine
No, I dont have a penny
But I’ll show you a good time”

The 8th of June will bring the release of another anxiously anticpated record and should be one of the hits of the summer presented to us by none other than Miss Little Boots. Hands, judging by the blog hits Meddle and Stuck On Repeat should ably to allow us to move on from Goldfrapp quite quickly and allow Victoria Hesketh to assume the throne. The official lead-off single is a seedy little ditty called New In Town. The track was produced by Greg Kurstin who also handled the production for the rest of the record as well as being responsible for Lily Allen’s latest. I offer a golf clap for a job well done. NIT is one of those songs that when you hear it on the radio, it will make your ears perk up. The voice and synths work in concert to transport to a dark early morning roaming the streets of New York or London and what you lack in currency, you more than make up for in courage. Little Boots just wants you to know that as long as you stick, you’ll be okay. Isn’t that a quaint concept? I suppose all my fears would disappear if I was walking the streets with Little Boots arm in arm but I digress…

The song’s hot. Check for it. It’s going to be a great summer.

“New In Town”, taken from the forthcoming I Am Sound release, “Hands”

PS:  Here’s the tracklisting for Hands:

]]> http://secretcircuits.wordpress.com/2009/04/22/this-used-to-be-the-future/ Thu, 23 Apr 2009 03:19:30 +0000 secretcircuits http://secretcircuits.wordpress.com/2009/04/22/this-used-to-be-the-future/

The new Pet Shop Boys album Yes is spectacular.

The special edition 2-disc version of the album has a set of remixes of songs from the proper album. Neil Tennant and Chris Lowe undertook the project inspired by an album of remixes by the Human League called Love and Dancing, which remixed the songs of Dare–which included a lot of famous Human League songs.

Not content with a second disc of masterful mixes, however, the Pet Shop Boys recruited Phil Oakey of the Human League to duet with Neil on a song titled “This Used to Be the Future.”

The song is absolutely wonderful! The duet with Tennant’s high voice and Oakey’s low register works beautifully. The song bemoans the loss of the vision of society that many futurists (and electronic bands even) invoked 30 years ago.

It’s terribly thrilling to hear these two great songsmiths meet on one great tune. This song alone makes the purchase of the double-disc album worthwhile.

More on the Pet Shop Boys tomorrow!

I hope you enjoyed the clip from Kes. Here’s a real lost comedy Classic from Reeves and Mortimer in their prime.

After the sucess of Big Night Out, Vic and Bob made this pilot as part of Channel 4’s Bunch of Fives. Sadly it wasn’t picked up and Vic and Bob went over to the BBC

My how time flies… It’s my hundredth post! I would just like to take the opportunity to thank all of you my readers that I lovingly call my Suedeheads. You are the reason this blog exists. Well…you and my insatiable ego but it’s mostly you guys! The blog really is a labour of love and I hope you stick with me for a few hundred more posts and please keep the comments coming and bands, send me some more tunes so I can talk about you! 

As a measure of my appreciation…

Neil Tennant + Chris Lowe + Phil Oakey = WHAT…….?

Yes upon its release will also be available as a limited edition which will include a second disc of remixes which will be entitled Yes Etc. It also features an absolute delectable track entitled This Used To Be The Future. A simply delicious song featuring vocals by not only Neil but Chris and yup, Phil Oakey of the Human League. Two titans of electronic pop get together for a track can be nothing short of breathtaking. The song laments that the promise of a brighter future we all thought would be a certainty in the eighties would go unfulfilled. The songs begs for your attention so check it out now. 

“This Used To Be The Future”, taken from the forthcoming Astralwerks release, “Yes Etc”

Not a chart-topper like Oakey and Sulley’s “No, I’M in the driving seat” cocktail bar drama, but easily the most dense, intricate and balls-out inspired of Dare’s mega-hits, ‘Love Action’ is arguably (I’m arguing) the shimmering pinnacle of ‘80s synth-pop. How come? It’s packed to the rafters with electronic effects, boasts half a dozen different keyboard riffs – each digression as thrilling as the last – and there’s that beam-me-up ‘meoww’ sound at the start. All this, and it glories in a towering Big Phil rap that casts Lou Reed forever as “the old man”. And Susanne yelps “HARD times”, without sounding awkward for once.

Echoing her confusion at The Man Machine’s cover, Junior sees Phil’s slapped-up face on the front of Dare and asks, “Why’s he a she?” Lord knows what she’d have made of Boy George in autumn 1982. She and my old man could’ve exchanged unhip daddio jokes. The next puzzle is “Why’s he looking through a rectangle?”, and perhaps we’ll never know. Still, these obstacles negotiated, she pops her feet into her dad’s Converse and winds her body to the sci-fi disco.

This is Phil talking:

I imagine 1981 was an exciting time for a properly sentient pop being. For me, everything was new yet everything was normal, but for the seasoned listener the sands were shifting – punk was gone, disco was (almost) gone, new wave was evolving, everyone had a synth and they were gonna use it. Who knew how it would all turn out? There were atrocities to come as the ‘80s took wing, but New Order, Pet Shop Boys, Juan Atkins, Derrick May, Phil Oakey, Arthur Baker and other visionaries showed technology could be handled with care and flair.

We find Green Gartside on the cusp, edging away from the dubness of early Scritti Politti singles to find a polished white soul sound wedged somewhere between lovers rock and dreamy new romanticism. Later his music would become so polished you could barely stop it slipping off the turntable, but there are still rough edges here: Robert Wyatt’s creepy, shimmering keys; mild echo and fizz; loose structure. Ever the philosopher, Green sings about the ‘sweetest girl’ through the prism of political theory – too detached to be romantic, too sweet to be dry.

Although there are still shouts for The Beatles from the back of the car, Junior concedes she likes the song, eventually asking me to turn it up. “Scritti Lippy” as she calls them – combining her twin passions of chapstick and not listening properly – can be a bit sticky for some, but she’s got a sweet tooth.

Politics is prior to the vagaries of science:

FeedbackReport says:
The new Mental Search Results are in
FeedbackReport says:
Ouch, there’s some genuine mentals out there, looking for genuinely mental stuff too
Ben says:
I shudder to think
FeedbackReport says:
“john barrowman stage door rumours”
Ben says:
He sings the complete Fleetwood Mac LP every night after shows
FeedbackReport says:
“boss cat some alcohol phil silvers”
Ben says:
Its a magic trick
FeedbackReport says:
“rubik cube’s neil hannon”
Ben says:
Wot? No Snakes?
FeedbackReport says:
“back to school oakey”
Ben says:
YOU THICK BAST
FeedbackReport says:
“andrew collins artwork”
Ben says:
What? His Puzzler covers?
FeedbackReport says:
“miss eve myles may i please see your bustage”
Ben says:
Yes. Yes you may. But only if I can watch.
FeedbackReport says:
“nathan petrelli fights the lambton worm”
FeedbackReport says:
*cries*
FeedbackReport says:
‘I’ll FLY at it!!’
Ben says:
I dont want that action figure set
FeedbackReport says:
“catherine tate sucks own tits”
Ben says:
.gif?
FeedbackReport says:
“spurious guitar”
Ben says:
Any featured on a Kooks LP
FeedbackReport says:
“rhythmic leotards spectrum show gear”
Ben says:
My new band name and album title
FeedbackReport says:
“andy williams no cookies no milk”
Ben says:
Wot? No Cookies No Milk?
FeedbackReport says:
John Lydon’s other autobiography, there
Ben says:
“No Irish, No Pogs, No Talent”
FeedbackReport says:
“melinda messenger fucked in gob”
Ben says:
Five’s autumn schedule there
FeedbackReport says:
“holly maconie chain letters”
Ben says:
….correct?
FeedbackReport says:
“rik and ade reunite for new brass eye”
Ben says:
I WILL KILL MYSELF IF THIS HAPPENS
FeedbackReport says:
“eve myles lick a girl pussy”
Ben says:
I WILL ENJOY MYSELF IF THIS HAPPENS
FeedbackReport says:
“frosty the snowman peppermint patty fanfic”
Ben says:
I…um…ok….ITS KWANZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
FeedbackReport says:
“david mitchell – brian david mitchell”
Ben says:
From Beverly Hills 90210?
FeedbackReport says:
“phil cool bends face to say happy birthday”
Ben says:
I’d just buy a card Phil lad, its much easier
Ben says:
“HAPPY EIGHTIES”
FeedbackReport says:
“julie graham two penisis cum on boobs”
Ben says:
I wish i had two penisisises
FeedbackReport says:
“why wasn’t wonderful christmastime on band on the run”
Ben says:
Because it came out six years later?
FeedbackReport says:
“the body in question theme music by jasen donovan”
Ben says:
Now thats a cover!
FeedbackReport says:
“i’m your puppet cbbc”
Ben says:
The Purifies Go To Moon (1972, 12 episodes)
FeedbackReport says:
“louis walsh puppet look-alike”
Ben says:
Thats just Louis Walsh
FeedbackReport says:
“stylophone 360″
Ben says:
The kids all wanted one of those for christmas.
FeedbackReport says:
“sweet gingerbread man played by a mop”
Ben says:
Drugs are great, arent they?
FeedbackReport says:
“pick me a username for youtube”
Ben says:
“Ihavenoimaginationandstink24″?
FeedbackReport says:
“did cybermen make bod?”
Ben says:
Yes.
FeedbackReport says:
“chris morris (the one that invented video)”
Ben says:
Not the one that invented ‘peddo’
FeedbackReport says:
“eve myles pie”
Ben says:
Mmmmm….
FeedbackReport says:
“russell brand in nice cardigan”
Ben says:
Makes a change from “Russell Brand in UR GRANDDORTER UNGH SEX LOL”
FeedbackReport says:
“graham linehan on only fools and horses”
Ben says:
Yes. He played Denzil. You would not believe the complaints.
FeedbackReport says:
“letitia dean tits out for weetabix”
Ben says:
There’s worse things to get them out for I suppose?
FeedbackReport says:
“watch the grimleys online free”
Ben says:
Its always on!
FeedbackReport says:
“puzzle trail uk theme song”
Ben says:
Certainly. It was “Give Me Hope Jo’Anna” by Eddy Grant
FeedbackReport says:
“catherine tate big tits in play”
Ben says:
Were they in the Christmas sale?
Ben says:
Ill take ten
FeedbackReport says:
“eve myles pushing a sandwich up her arse”
Ben says:
Ill take ten
FeedbackReport says:
“rolf harris saturday superstore 1986″
Ben says:
Good luck with that
FeedbackReport says:
“mel smith goes to class”
Ben says:
UK title: Wilt
FeedbackReport says:
“kate thornton naked except for fingerless gloves”
Ben says:
Who’d want to see THAT?
FeedbackReport says:
Erm… me?
Ben says:
And me.
FeedbackReport says:
“liza tarbuck having sex with cricketers”
Ben says:
[joke about stumps and middle creases]
FeedbackReport says:
“adam and joe stole theme tune from advert by blur”
Ben says:
No, to be fair Martin Phipps did
FeedbackReport says:
“telly addicts 1988 champns”
Ben says:
It was “Th Dth T Vwls Tm” from Crydn
FeedbackReport says:
“phil catterall troika”
Ben says:
I knew it! Also: what?
FeedbackReport says:
“oops on the way to bethlehem”
Ben says:
Well, they had to eat something
FeedbackReport says:
“daleks at bongos”
Ben says:
AT?!?
FeedbackReport says:
“girl from heroes and veronica mars big tits”
Ben says:
They arent that big. Not that it’d be the first thing you thought of about her anyway.
FeedbackReport says:
“grange hill wolf”
Ben says:
BEST. SEASON. EVER.
FeedbackReport says:
“boney bear singing”
Ben says:
Please stop. I have blood in my eyes.
FeedbackReport says:
“morph and white plasticine man name”
Ben says:
Charles McHaltenwood
FeedbackReport says:
“roland rat sound effect”
Ben says:
*smoosh*
FeedbackReport says:
“when will december eastenders be on”
Ben says:
April 25th
FeedbackReport says:
…and that’s it
Ben says:
I worry severely about the mental health of the public at large. Also: any chance of those Eve Myles jpgs before I go?

Last night with a thousand other midlifers to see three bands from my youth at Wolverhampton Civic Hall. I usually avoid this sort of musical necrophilia, but I thought it would be a nice pre-Christmas treat for Mrs D, who can still play an Ultravox album without irony.

One of the inevitables with this sort of “back from the dead” tour is seeing how well the performers have weathered over the the years.  Pretty good in most instances, although there was the odd middle aged spread being held in by the apparently compulsory grey suits.

Heaven 17 were fun.  Someone’s son on drums, I suspect (certainly not an original member).  Glenn Gregory (vocals, trilby, waistcoat) was obviously utterly delighted to be performing.  Great female vocals too. Temptation predictably brought the house down and I could have done with that being twice as long.

I have a soft spot for ABC, having seen them in a very intimate pre-tour warm up gig in the early 80s.  I was particularly looking forward to seeing the drummer, who had quite an individual style.  Disappointingly the sticksman they have now was much more conventional in his technique.

They did have quite a charistmatic female percussionist/vocalist though, which made up for it a bit.

It was all very professional, but in the old days Martin Fry really committed to those nonsense lyrics he writes.  After so long, and with a new album (they did a couple of tracks, which were fine, but didn’t get the crowd going) there’s a feeling that he’d rather be doing the new stuff.

Human League

And then the main attraction.  And no doubt about the stature of Human League in this package.  Ambitious staging (two level, giant LED screen across the full width of the stage).

Shock to see the once hair-curtained Phil Oakey now with a male pattern baldness No 1. Still looking good, though and with that insistent baritone voice in good shape.

Of the two female  singers, Susan Ann Sulley (the blonde one) is great value.  Looking magnificent, toned and blingy, and with great stagecraft (actually better than Oakey, who is a better singer than he is a frontman).

Joanne Catherall, unfortunately, is the Andrew Ridgely of the outfit.  Looking desperately uncomfortable in an ill-advised flapper dress, she looks every inch the girl that Phil snatched from a Sheffield disco nearly thirty years ago – if that disco was a gay bar frequented by transvestite plumbers.

But the set was one electropop classic after another.  There was much wearing of keyboards. Giant love hearts rolled around the stage to Love Action.  Fascination, Don’t You Want Me… you know the canon, and they (Catherall apart) delivered it with conviction.

Returning quickly for a remarkably fresh-sounding Being Boiled, they spoiled it for me by finishing with Electric Dreams. Hey guys, that’s not a Human League song, it’s pure fromage.

The audience didn’t care, though.  They went back home happy, aching slightly, not caring (until the cold morning) about work and wondering where the last 25 years have gone.

I was in a High School changeroom, changing, as one does. I thought ‘Someday soon, I will not belong here anymore.’

And that was it, really.

I have been exquisitely well-rested of late. In and of itself, that makes me happy.

I would like to have a full-on eighteenth century prince outfit.

Actually, I would like to be a prince, but of somewhere like Ibiza, Andorra or Luxembourg where I could wear ridiculous outfits and ride a pony around the place in relative peace. And it would be the eighties and I would also be a popular singer, with the face of Phil Oakey and the voice of David Sylvian. Here’s a mock-up:

Microsoft paint, bringing your dreams to hideously pixelated life since 1995

Someone once told me I had a voice like Phil Oakey, and that made my day. No, that made my week.

Today I got home and what looked like ‘comfort’ from a distance was actually ‘compost’. So I’m not getting a new pillow after all. I don’t want to play with the compost.