OK for another time
we come to you to teach to honor and to enjoy
we come to give you guidance that you need so that you may be more accountable and better suited to align with source
yes this is the purpose of every word we send
every lesson we teach and this is the role we play in your life
call us angels call us guides spirits
or what have you
we are collective entities, collective consciousness
that come together for the purpose and charge of guiding you all to the best and highest development possible
for those who become aware of our presence we are at their beck and call and can assist with nearly anything
however we cannot take charge nor take away your choice
we can only guide and advise
this is important to understand
and the fact is each of you have access to your guide(s)
each of you can ask for the best and highest in any situation and seek an answer
in essence we are a part of you
yes we are assigned to you but we are also extensions of source on another plane that assist you in all your comings and goings
we lead you to solutions
your desires are the bait if you will
yes
the highest purpose for your life is enjoyment
so even if your desires will not lead to the highest purpose
we can still use these desires to help guide you to the best and highest solutions
though not always what you expect
yes
our goal is to assist you and guide you to the best and highest in the fastest way possible
but that always depends on the starting point
if you keep yourself at a high vibration
keep yourself at the frequency of love
attuned to source
then we can easily help guide and you can also see much of what is needed to act upon
understand we are here just as you are here and our purpose is much clearer to us than most of you
we assist you in waking up to your purpose
giving your true solution and being that which you are called to be
continue your practices
continue expanding your awareness
increasing the vibrancy of your presence
through thoughts and feelings of love
through focusing on light and love near the heart and expanding it throughout your body
through allowing source energy to flow freely through you and through letting go of all limiting thinking
conditioned illusions
and forgiving and giving freely
be limitless love
feel the limitless love in you as you
through you
know that your are an extension of source by feeling your true nature
choosing the vibrations of source and feeling them throughout your being
yes
and so it is

…No, not that President; Ronald Regan in 1981.   The blog One Man’s Thoughts reminds us what life was like 28 years ago.  Though you still have to go a long way to match Charles Schulz scripting the speech Linus gives in the first Peanuts Christmas special.

The scary thing about the woman who attacked the Pope on Christmas Eve isn’t that she tried the same thing the year before, but that she was wearing the same outfit.  Especially when you think she could have been doing something creative, like the Bowen Beer Bottle Band did.  Then again, when it comes to Christmas and beer bottles, it would be hard to beat this Chinese project.

A more nobler project however, is the kind Nashville pastor Pete Wilson heard about while watching the news last week, only to discover the people showing kindness were from his own church!

But when it comes to doing good, it’s easy to not see the big picture, have wrong motives, or misplaced priorities.   Jumping into the Shoebox debate with what I believe is one of her best blog posts ever, Ruth Wilkinson (who may be related) discusses charity vs. justice and introduces a third possibility — presence — into the mix.

Sadly though, sometimes those who give themselves to the service of others pay the ultimate price.  Pray for the family of Little Rock, Arkansas Salvation Army Major Philip Wise who was shot and killed — in front of his three young children — in a Christmas Eve robbery.

And while you’re praying remember blogger Michael Spencer, the Internet Monk, and proprietor of Boars Head Tavern; two of the most popular Christian blogs as he faces some uncertain health challenges, blogger and pastor Matt Chandler facing a battle with cancer, Canadian blogger and former sports chaplain David Fisher, and Stephen Weber, writer of the Daily Encouragement devotional site recovering from hernia surgery.

See ya back here in 24 hours, Lord willing.

Don’t give me presents
On Christmas day
Give me your presence instead
Wherein my heart flies
To meet my soul
Beyond words into
Truth
Felt only

Uncontained
By wrappings and ribbons
Undefined by greeting cards

My piece of peace
My joue my jew
My joy
My magi
Magically real

This day and
Any day

No other name given to men
can be uttered without undertstanding the significance of the christ
this consciousness this legend
this myth and all that surrounds it
for the reality is Jesus the character you know and hear of was a saint
in full connection to source
and in reality existed as one who came in fullness of love with clear connection to source
clear vision and understanding of source and who source is in him as him through him
yes
this same life is yours
can be completely fulfilled to the same degree by any one of you
for it is simply a matter of truly aligning moment to moment
and letting source live through you unimpeded by the illusions unimpeded by the conditioned thinking and the limited understanding and faulty reasoning of the mind
let your thoughts rest on that of love
let that empower you and align with these vibrations to bring you the clarity, the connection the fulfilment and life you are here to lead
this is key this is important this is simple
focus your mind on feelings and thoughts of love
and let source bring the vibration, the energy the power the presence the fullness you are missing into your life

- Morning stream of consciousness writing from John Stringer
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It’s All About Jesus!

Spirit of Prophecy Bulletin

SMALL STRAWS IN A SOFT WIND by Marsha Burns — Dec. 25, 2009:

I’m giving you an extra measure of grace. I will exert My holy influence over your life to strengthen you and bolster your faith, says the Lord. If you will discern it, you will find and enjoy the unusual fragrance of My company. Receive with joy, and bask in the sweetness of My presence. Come and find your delight and rest with Me.

2 John 1:3 Grace, mercy, and peace will be with you from God the Father and from the Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of the Father, in truth and love.

Merry Christmas!

Happy Birthday Jesus!

One may have awakened round 2:30 AM this morning.  One may have posted one’s blog from yesterday.  One may have read the Spirit of Prophecy Bulletin for today.  One may have proceeded to one’s prayer closet.

One may have begun with song and praise to the Lord.  One may have had a strong desire for the Lord this morning.  One may have prayed for a closer walk and relationship with Jesus.  One may have thought about what the Lord said in yesterday’s message, “Your wish is My command.”  One may have been encouraged by this statement and had an insatiable appetite for more of Jesus as one prayed.

One may have spent most of one’s time confessing one’s sins.  While standing, one may have lifted one’s bible to heaven and asked the Lord to lead one to the scripture of His choosing for the day.  One may have prayed several ways for this request before actually opening one’s Bible.

One may have opened one’s Bible and one’s eyes fell on Jeremiah 10:19.  One may have read to the end of this chapter.  One may have read Jeremiah 11:1-9.  It may have been one’s time to leave one’s prayer closet, so one may finish reading Jeremiah 10 and Jeremiah 11 at a later time.

One may have logged onto the website to pray for outstanding prayer requests.  Thank you Lord Jesus for answering each prayer according to your perfect will, amen.

you don’t read about it in the papers. or hear about it on tv. it’s not even high profile on the internet. and yet there is a mindblowing shift taking place right now – almost invisibly – under the surface of life. it is often refered to as the awakening of consciousness. 

it’s easily the biggest thing happening on the planet – far more significant than climate change or the hijacking of democracy… and yet relatively few people are talking about it, and those that do tend to discuss it in quite a dry theoretical way.

what i am interested in is what the awakening of consciousness means in our daily lives? how does it affect me, the people around me and humanity in general? 

how do we know it’s happening to us? how can we embrace it gracefully – because even positive change is challenging? and, perhaps most importantly, how can we facilitate the emergence of this incredible ecstatic shift? and is the pathway the same for men and women?

this is what i am interested in exploring on this blog. because it’s only thing that is going to make a difference on the planet.

as i see it, we – as a species – started off pretty much like animals, running on instinct and emotion. the miracle of conscious thought then emerged – we could reflect, make choices, plan ahead, worry… but the price we have paid is being lost in our thoughts most of the time. and, even worse, feeling separate from the rest of creation. we have lost the simple joie de vivre that animals have.

what is happening now though is incredible. the next leap in consciousness, similar to the emergence of the thinking mind, is now becoming available. instead of being totally identified with our thoughts, we now have the possibility of shifting to the next level: still having access to thinking, but no longer being lost in our thoughts. what is emerging now is an ability to experience presence.

presence is like the container which holds all of life. it’s the void out of which life emerges. it’s the stillnes that underlies everything. it’s almost impossible to explain to someone who hasn’t experienced it. but one whiff of it, even for a moment, and you are hooked.

it’s like the best drug ever available… and just as addictive, but also the most healing experience you can have in your life.   

up until now most people have experienced it through meditation and prayer. but what seems to be shifting now, in my life anyway, is that i don’t just experience it when i’m meditating. i am starting to have access to it most of the time – whenever i tune in really. and when i do tune in, and have a sense of presence holding me, then it alters everything i do. 

everything becomes like a prayer. when i sing, from presence, the sounds heal my body (and everyone who hears me). when i dance or even write, everything flows more easily. i can relax, surrender, knowing that i am held. i no longer have to defend my ego… i can just let go.

it means that everything i do is potentially in integrity, for the highest good of all. and as more and more people have this experience, the whole world will automatically shift. because everyone will get on and do what they have come here to do, instead of competing from a place of ego and destroying the planet.

i think this is what 2012 and all the prophecies are about – shifting from our ego-based, separate, meaningless existence to feeling expansive, connected and operating from our souls, offering our true gifts to the world.

Some of you may know that I speak often of the elephant in the room. For somebody who has experienced abuse it’s a BIG issue and so often an ignored topic of discussion. Truly, look at the response Mackenzie Phillips got when she spoke out: big, huge elephants in the room. So, because I speak of elephants a lot people remember me when they see something with elephants on it. That’s great for marketing I’ll tell you. But, here’s the even nicer piece…Sometimes somebody, just ’cause they’re kind and generous, picks up something with an elephant theme on it and gives it to me….Today was one such day. A lovely couple I’ve met recently at our local dog park gave me a gift….We know each other well enough to have been to each other’s homes but I was still surprised, even more so when I was told it was the husband who saw it and said it’d be a great gift for me. Wow, how blessed. So, I opened it and it’s a beautiful white teapot shaped like an elephant. How cute. I love tea and I love elephants so it’s a perfect gift! So, thank you Doug and Jane for your generosity, your kindness and your thoughtfulness. You are kind beyond words and whenever I drink my tea from my elephant teapot I’ll think of you, especially now that you’re almost packed up and ready to go so far away!

Celebrate with joy, with love, with laughter, with peace in your heart and a smile on your face.

Living la vida fearless, Jan

www.thrivingbeyondabuse.com

www.tobeyourbest.net

 MERRY XMAS TO ALL AND TO ALL A GOOD FEAST!!

It’s Christmas again and I like others I found myself racing around to get that last present to put under the tree. We are making arrangements for the friends and family we will visit over the next couple of days, who we will have lunch with, what time we need to leave to make it to the next home ….wrapping presents, and so on.

Our pastor started a series of sermons at our church this season focused on Advent and he threw out a challenge;

Spend less, but Give More this season

As he unwrapped this message each week a big takeaway for me is the Christmas season was never meant to be about buying, the stress of what to buy, how much to buy, did I spend the same amount on each child, what to bake for the party tonight,….it is about being thankful for the present out Lord gave us in his only son; Jesus Christ. This present opened up an opportunity for each of us to have a relationship with our Lord.

So this year I am working very hard to give the gift of “Presence” to those I love and care about. Presence is being 100% present with those you are with. This is admittedly a challenge for me as my mind is always racing, solving problems for my clients, mentally writing the next blog and Twitter posts.

This year I challenge everyone to truly give the gift of Presence to those you love. This gift, unlike others is a treasure that can not ever be stolen once given, we can out outgrow it, it never comes in the wrong color or size, and once given blesses both the giver and the receiver.

Have a Merry Christmas and may you find the deep joy that can only be found by being present with those you love.

Know that there is no separation
there is no distance between you and source
there is nothing between you other than false illusions
know that source is already a part of you
you are already connected and you only need let go of the illusions
only need let go of the limitations the conditioned thinking you have been programmed and repetitively bombarded with
so that you have accepted the normal illusions as truth
do not give in to this fallacy
do not give in
if you call on source to reveal the truth to you
to open your eyes
you will see a greater expansion
a greater presence
a greater life than you have ever known
all you need do is allow and let source be through you in you as you
yes
it takes practice to let go
but you can do it
some are even able to let go quickly and consistently
it is up to you how quickly and how consistently you choose to let go
letting go is giving up the knowledge you have accepted and relied on so much and relying on the guidance of source within you to confirm or deny what is best and highest to act upon
what is best and highest to believe
and what is best and highest to feel
yes
feel the relief
feel the beauty of life
feel the joy of being
feel it now and know that your abundance does not lie on the shoulders of your hard work
it lies on your aligned and inspired being
that is the fastest way to allow source to do what is best for all concerned
that is the fastest way to allow abundance to flow freely
know this and allow it to be so in your life
through experience yes
through your now
yes that is critical
to truly knowing this
being this
living this
now
allow

- Morning stream of consciousness writing from John Stringer
Find out more about this blog by reading the BACKGROUND STORY.

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When Heather recently mentioned that her daughter’s birthmother had been out for a weekend visit, I was impressed. Gosh, I thought. I need a day to recover after just eight hours spend with Cricket’s family. I can’t imagine! And yet Heather seemed both calm and pleased. Well, Beth probably lives eight hours away, and options are limited. What a practical solution. But I went ahead and asked: Do you like these long visits? Really? Is it cool?

Heather explains that Beth lives an hour and a half away, and that

“If you’re trying to approach open adoption the way we are, which is to integrate adoption into our regular lives to the extent that it’s possible and appropriate, I think there are two fairly simple means: either to have an ultra-local adoption, in which people live close enough to easily drop by for a meal or come to a dance recital, or to spend longer strings of days together. The sporadic day visits have always felt stilted and oddly segregated from the rest of our life, to me. It’s hard to get to know people very well. I was worried when we moved that we were losing the chance to have a certain casual familiarity with Ray and Kelly, but what we ended up gaining by doing extended visits turned out to be better for our particular open adoption (again, from our perspective). When we first were getting to know Beth, both Todd and I both expressed the hope that she wouldn’t feel like she lived too close to come up and stay with us sometimes, because we really wanted to have those longer times together.”

I asked Mr. Book whether he would want a weekend visit some time: No, because “I just don’t enjoy their company enough to be around them for a few days . . . and that much time with the baby would be too hard.” We live three hours away from Ruth and Nora, and they’ve offered to let us stay over  before, but we’ve always opted to drive back.

I actually have stayed with Ruth and Nora for a few days; I visited them in the Emerald City near the end of the pregnancy, saw their digs and attended their baby shower. I had a lot of trouble eating and sleeping. I was just too nervous, couldn’t relax, and was, frankly, afraid to go root around in the fridge even after they’d explicitly given me permission. There was some talk of having me move up there to give birth, and one of my secret reasons for declining was that I couldn’t eat. I had packed a case of Luna bars, and that’s most of what I got by on—we also went out to eat twice, and dinner was formally set out once. But I thought that while I would be okay not really eating for a couple of weeks myself, it wouldn’t be right to do that to the mouse. So when I imagine staying up there for a few days now, I see myself not being able to sleep or eat breakfast—and I’m already tense enough when we’re all together without that. I’ve also gotten sick after the visits we’ve had so far (usually a migraine or just a flu-y bug)—what if I woke up sick on day two?

Looking at Heather’s list of advantages, they make sense to me, but feel like they wouldn’t apply in our situation: we have a little grownup time while Cricket naps, but Mr. Book finds it boring, and definitely wouldn’t want more; we don’t get alone time with Cricket, and I don’t think that’s something Ruth or Nora would be comfortable with; we do have visits at their home, and I think that’s a good thing. Nora suggested one time that we might meet halfway at a park or something, and I’m relieved that I never had to explain how much I hate that idea. (It just screams “Did you bring the money?” “Yeah, we’ve got the money—did you bring the kid?” kidnapping/custody battle/made-for-tv movie weirdness to me.)

There’s an event I want to attend in the Emerald City next summer, and there are people I’d like to see who aren’t connected to Ruth and Nora. I made a joke to Mr. Book about asking whether we could stay with them, but it was a joke—we’ll either commute or scrape together cash for a motel room. I feel as though the relationship is slightly in flux right now, but when it settles down, I don’t think we’ll be that kind of close.

Today was spent driving in a car. I drove from Chicago to Northeast Pennsylvania by myself–12 hours. I made a conscious effort to be in a good space while driving no matter what happens which came in handy more than once.

I made a decision to be a courteous driver, letting other people do what they need to do. When I encountered an accident and traffic was backed up, I just relaxed and let myself be calm where I was.

Then, when I entered a construction area and traffic was moving very slowly I was able to just relax and allow traffic to move at its pace without attempting to get ahead somehow. I didn’t even get frustrated when others cars went zooming ahead on the left side. This usually would make me crazy. I’d get indignant thinking “those people think their time is more important than mine”? This time, I didn’t get angry. I exercised great patience.

Then when I got tired instead of pushing through the tiredness, I stopped and took a nap. This was quite a new behavior for me.

I discovered being accepting of where I was in the moment made the trip much more enjoyable.

Do you have any examples of a time when presence help you cope better with challenging situations?

“… and He will live with them.”    ~ Rev. 21:3

Awesome to remember the Gift you gave, Jesus Christ, Immanuel!

Amazing to realize that you are among your people and that we can enjoy the pleasure of your company!

Astonished with your goodness to me, I bow in humble gratefulness for the Gift of your presence – a true reason to celebrate!

It came into your work flow this year and now you couldn’t live without it. It has simplified or improved your online experience.

Here is where the truth comes out, I love twitter. The ability to be able to instantly communicate with 140 characters to anyone in the world is pretty neat. Not only can this be done online on the website itself, but to be able to continue this communication using your cellphone or PDA device is great. Twitter has quickly become one of my favorite networking tools.

I believe that utilizing twitter has really helped my online presence in 2009. It has helped me meet some great people, and even take part in my first “tweet-up” in NYC. It was a great and fun gathering of folks I had only previously spoken to online via twitter and other online communities.

———
This blog post is in response to Gwen Bell’s Best of 2009 Blog Challenge

Only two more sleeps and Christmas will be here. Here’s how my life used to be around this time of year:

Kid’s gifts, adult gifts, food prep for many people, open houses to host and attend, corporate functions to attend, more gift buying and giving, church, more food prep..I was usually tired, happy but tired. I was usually glad to see the day finally arrive as it meant that whatever was done was done and the rest was just going to have to be good enough.

I don’t really remember a lot of the Christmas’ past: I do have great memories but not lots. I realize it’s because I was so busy thinking about presents that I wasn’t present to mySELF.

This year, after I attained my coaching certification, moved to a new home, lost a dear friend, gained many more dear friends I’ve changed it up. I’m being present and not taking on a lot of “shoulds” this year. I’m keeping it low key, I’m spending time with my beautiful family, my cute furry huskys, my music, my books, the snow, the smell of good food, the twinkle of lights on the tree and I’m going to enjoy the moments. I’m not going to worry, I’m not going to wish something to be different. My children are healthy and home this year, my husband is employed, I’m employed and I LOVE my work coaching abuse thrivers…truly I am blessed. That’s the gift I give to me this year: to be present to the moments. It’s what I wish for you too!

Living la vida fearless,

Jan

www.thrivingbeyondabuse.com

www.tobeyourbest.net

I have been present in a number of settings recently where people groused rather than expressed gratitude for the holidays.  The refrain, “I hate Christmas” is expressed every day by some one in my circle of associates.  I can understand that for many the holidays dig up a lot of bad memories from childhood.  Or perhaps bad marriages dig them up.  But the past is just that. Past! To continue letting what happened “then” determine what we see and feel now, is like raiding the refrigerator for week-old left-overs rather than eating the freshly prepared meal that’s sitting before us on the table.  I can’t say that every memory of my Christmases past is a great one but dragging any one of those memories, good or bad, into this moment is an ill-conceived idea and one that cheats me of the joy that living here and now promises me.  Getting the “hang of ” living here and now is a gift as sure to please as the most treasured material gift one has ever received and it’s one that can be re-experienced, over and over again, with the same promise wrapped in it.  That God as we understand him is in each moment and every one of them has been divinely planned for us. We need not worry, now or ever, that we aren’t being led to where we need to be, to meet those who are purposefully waiting for us.  Whether it’s Christmas or any other day of the year, let’s seek to appreciate the joy that is a guaranteed part of God’s plan.  None of us has been left out of this circle.

My father was a great procrastinator when it came to giving gifts at Holidays. When the kids were little, I convinced him that a peddle-car and a giant teddy bear were just what would delight his grandchildren. He bought and paid for my suggestions. He wasn’t big on Christmas, but he was big on his grand-kids. I’ve had a variety of Christmas holidays over the years – starting with my childhood, when my greatly blended family would sit around a long table and Cousin Sally would always pinch my cheeks until they hurt and turned red. I liked the other side of the family’s Christmas better – no cheek-pinching, but lots of presents for me to watch my cousins unwrap. And always a baked ham.

Later on, Lars’ brother’s wife, Brenda,  decorated Christmas trees for each room in the house (and there were many rooms). One tree featured ballerinas; another Walt Disney ornaments. Still another was full of teddy bears. And so on.  Their Christmas celebrations also involved elaborate meals with many elaborate gifts, each one larger and more expensive than the one before it. Tiffany Blue boxes were always present. The kids liked visiting their home on Christmas, which was seldom, as we lived in another state. Even if the gifts were mailed, the kids each got one extravagant present, usually a hoped-for toy.  One time, Lars and I got a set of sheets; another time, a pottery lamp. Perhaps we’d been naughty. So had been some other family members. They got the same exact gifts.

Much of the family from Christmas Past is gone now. Their memories have lasted longer than their gifts.  And that is important, I think, to remember this year and next. It’s not the cost of the gift nor the intrinsic value. It’s not how it is wrapped or where it came from.  It’s the love that goes into giving the present (remember O’Henry’s Gift of the Magi?).

If it’s a have-to-give-present like the pottery lamp, the disdain lingers, long after the lamp has been donated to a charity. If it’s a hand-made or hand-crafted gift, it always enhances the meaning of the gift. I’ve been both a sender and a receiver in the hand-made category.

This year, under my tree, rather simple due to finances,  I will be thinking about all of those family and friends who made my Holidays meaningful in the past. Their presence is felt strongly.

Prediction: Many consumers still feel the pressure to give this year, despite financial hardship. But, whether it’s a card or a car, the air has gone out of the rampant gift-giving materialism of Christmases past.  It is not likely to return. If you can penetrate to the heart of the matter (your love for family and friend), the Holidays will be much more meaningful and long-lasting. Expressing your love in words or with your hands is the greater gift you can give. It will make for a lasting presence under the Christmas tree.

*Please excuse the overabundance of Christmas references.  I am in full on elf mode and can’t help myself.  No matter what you believe and celebrate, I am wishing you and yours a very happy and healthy season!

You might be scrambling for thoughtful, although last minute, gifts for kith and kin.  And since On Tap for Today is  the internet’s most reliable source of information (second only, perhaps, to the wikipedia pages I myself have edited), here you are.

Or maybe, you’re completely bored and there are no Golden Girls marathons on today.  Or even more likely, you searched for something important… like, which beers are on tap at your local spot today.  Whoops.  I welcome you, irregardless.

This time of year, the internet is overflowing with gift guides, promising to lead you to the Golden Fleece of presents.  One that will never be re-gifted, but rather treasured for all time.  While the other folks will tell you what to buy, I felt it my duty to advise you of the opposite.

In some particular order, the five presents you must not buy:

• Manties, Mantyhose, or Manx. For the imaginationally challenged, those are panties, pantyhose and Spanx specially designed for men.  (Please do your own Yahooing, I do not want to be held responsible for providing links for these.) I am all for gender equality, but since when is the right to wear pantyhose something one would actively seek out?  Equal pay?  Hell, yes.  But pantyhose?  Really?  This is one of those gifts you should entrust your friends and loved ones to purchase for themselves.  Enter the gift card.

www.amazon.com

• Sure, the Mr. Toad Bathroom Butler may be marked down from $169.99 to $74.95 on Amazon…  but there are times when saving 56% is a bad thing.  In this case, it’s a very bad thing.

I'm scared.

• The Flowbee Vacuum Haircut System promises you’ll “have fun, save money” and that this futuristic vacuum attachment is “safe and easy to use.”  Safe or not, this thing is terrifying.  This photo, which happens to feature Rick Hunts, Flowbee inventor, suggests that my vacuum has the power transform the men in my life into Miami Vice characters.  And maybe the hair that’s sucked off their heads will mistakenly shoot out onto their faces, giving them an awkward mustache.  Is that really worth the $99.99?

But wait… haircut clean up is only a suction away! Nope.  This is still a bad idea.  Don’t buy it.  You might want to visit their site, however.  The picture of the lady Flowbee-ing is priceless.

• We have high ceilings in our condo, and I often wonder what we will do the day something happens up there.  I am not sure what that something might be… but it would be handy to have some sort of collapsible ladder around.  I’m all for practical gifts.  Things people will use, and even better, might need.  I am not all for practical gifts that might cause bodily harm, like… say… the Telesteps 12 1/2 Aluminum Telescoping Ladder.

If you’re laughing right now, you’re completely sick.  And you just earned membership in my exclusive club.

Please don't bite me. Photo: makli.com

• And last but not least, the final gift you should not, under any circumstances, go out and buy for a loved one this Christmas: those weird little  hamster toys.  I’m not including them on this list because of GoodGuide’s warning that they contain higher than allowed levels of the chemical antimony.  Heck, I don’t even know what an antimony is.  I just think these toys are plain old creepy.  Who wants a robotic rodent tooting around their home, underfoot.  And what if your child loved their mock hamster, but an unsuspecting relative tried to play the hero, squashing the wee electronipet and saving your family’s holiday meal from infestation?  Now that would make for a great story.

At the end of the day, there may be no better present than your presence.  Unless you’re a bad person.  Just kidding… you’re perfect. Back away from the last minute “deals” and just show up as your merry self.  After all, we celebrate Christmas* because Baby Jesus arrived… not because He arrived with a Zhu-Zhu pet.

Also On Tap for Today:

• How cool are these caroling word garlands?
• Nick and I are celebrating Christmas a bit early, before he and the puppy head north to Nick’s parents’ house
• Remember those seat and reach tests we had to take in Phys. Ed.?

How are you/have you been celebrating the holidays?  Do you have a favorite tradition to share?  Or a particularly awful special present?

More on the theme of letting go.

Choose silence, and love is apparent

It’s a word, I promise…

Well, it’s not, but it’s just been added to the “International Dictionary of Kelsey”

Terror is so dramatic, like the climax of Sophie’s Choice…what’s she going to do?

Drama.

According to my friend, Meredith, I am Drama.

Haha!

The difference between Terror & “just being scared” is the capability Terror has on someone to completely freeze them up. Have you ever noticed that? That feeling of being scared doesn’t really have serious implications, other than the hair standing up on your back…oh, I mean the back of the neck… Terror, on the other hand, causes heart palpitations, a keen awareness of weird noises & bumps in the night & the inability to move.

When I was a kid, I spent many sleepless nights in terror. Since my sisters & I had the luxury of having our own rooms, I was left all alone at night, in the dark vastness of a terrifying spiritual world. Not knowing at the time that I have been blessed with the gift of discernment, I was often frozen in fear. Literally. It would take several renditions of the Lord’s Prayer (not having it memorized) or silent verses of Jesus Loves Me to muster up the courage to either call for Dad’s help or close my eyes to drift off into a light sleep, still having a feeling that evil was waiting for me to let my spiritual guard down & devour me.

To this day, I often get a sense of evil prowling around or peace that comes with God’s protection. Sometimes I curse my overly emotional or “Feeler” character flaws, but I remind myself that the correlation between those flaws & my ability to feel God’s guidance or presence is not a coincidence. Discernment.

The problem is that I find myself too busy to take time to feel God’s presence. This is a common struggle that Christians have: not enough time for God. Don’t get me wrong, I’m pretty faithful in my “Quiet Times”, but it’s not the same as experiencing God. After all, talking on the phone with a friend just isn’t the same as sitting down with them over a cup of coffee & truly experiencing their presence. Lately, I feel like I’ve been having a lot of phone conversations with God & not enough coffee dates.

Terror.

Maybe this lack of experience has added some extra terror to my life….?

I’ve realized that I’m slightly terrified of being in a relationship with someone. I’m terrified of getting hurt again…frozen, the inability to move forward. Heartbreak is such a bitch! (pardon my French)…this terrification might not be the result of evildoing, but may be God’s presence after all. When He is present & the focus of the relationship (romantic or platonic) is on God, the uncertainty & terror dissipates. Joy & peace remains & prevails.

God is either telling me that it’s not time for me to be in a relationship or that whatever relationship I’m about to embark upon needs to center itself around Him.

So, with all this, a lone theme remains…

God’s presence.

Metaplace, the web-based virtual world that never got out of beta, announced its closing yesterday. I never really became engaged with its interface for a number of reasons, but it did seem to have caught on for those who learned to build there. I could never feel a sense of presence with my avatar–maybe because I couldn’t get literally close to it. It seemed more like a paper doll. And the worlds, themselves, or at least mine, were not naturally interactive. I couldn’t even imagine it being of interest to children. Another problem for me was that I could not explore it at work, because of a firewall–yes, it’s my job to do such exploration at work. Currently, I can only go to Second Life® at work, not Heritage Key or Reaction Grid or Quest Atlantis, without a formal request and temporary access.

So, I couldn’t get a snapshot of my Metaplace world (Sangwin’s World) as it currently exists, but here’s an older view that I will replace when I’m at home. Now, what am I going to do with that avatar name, Sangwin?

Had a lot of fun talking with Briddick today, about socializing, relationships, fear and ego.  Great questions from the chat room too!

http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/3316402