What do you often hear when you think of an adapted movie?  The book was better.  Oh yes, and the book is almost always better.  Why this is, is nothing the film can stop.  The stories in novels are generally written that way because the author felt they could be told that way the best.  The same goes for graphic novels, musicals, plays and the like.  Each author felt that the medium they chose was the best for their work.  Changing mediums is always risky.

This article is not about me bitching that adaptations don’t do it right.  I know why film adaptations will always be different or, in the college student’s trump card-like excuse, I took a film and literature class.  These are the inexcusable changes to endings where it was actually detrimental to the film as a whole, at least in my opinion.  Get your geek goggles on, cuz it’s time for a list of five movies (in no particular order) that jacked it up.

Warning: CONTAINS SPOILERS

I Am Legend

The Book:

The story of I Am Legend is the story of scientist Robert Neville as he fights against zombie/vampires that are turned by a disease.  Heralded as a unique take on both fandom’s mythos and a dark look at humanity itself, the book is an excellent and quick read.  It has been adapted into three feature films, the most recent of which shares the same name.

The movie:

As far as movie adaptations goes, it’s pretty good for while, we slowly see a build up, development and plot threads laid throughout (a basic component of writing) leading up to the big reveal at the end.  At first, the monsters are viewed simply as that: terrifying monster that will murder and kill anything in their way.  As time goes by, we see they are actually clever creatures, capable of building traps, holding meetings and communicating.  They also seem to have a form of government with a clearly defined “leader”.  There’s also symbolism involving a butterfly laced throughout, linking Neville, his family and the vampires to each other.  Then the ending comes and…

Robert Neville blows everything up.

Why it was a stupid change:

Apparently, the studio didn’t like the original’s tone?  Test audience didn’t like it?  I’m not sure, but the reason it sucks is because it removes the entire point of the original story.  The point was that the vampires come and try to rescue a girl that Neville has taken and is experimenting on.  The big reveal here is that these are rational creatures on a rescue mission and that he is the monster from their legends.  A real “Oh Shit” moment to be sure.

We are supposed to sypathize with the creature

Instead, Neville tosses a grenade and dies as a martyr, essentially trashing every plot thread throughout the movie up to that point.  Hooray Hollywood.

Did they fix it?:  The original ending is on the DVD release.  Watch is as God intended.

Rambo

If you are a man you will read this book.

The Book:

The book Rambo is based off of, is called First Blood hence the subtitle of the original film.  In it, the character of Rambo is hitchhiking through a lonely Kentucky town, still wearing his Vietnam gear.  He is picked up and treated poorly by the sheriffs, shaved beaten and witness to abuse of others who are jailed there.  He escapes and hides in the mountains, killing anyone who comes after him in a manhunt, essentially reverting back into his soldier mode as he is pushed to the edge.  The book is powerful in its commentary on both the way soldiers returning from the war were treated and how the law often abuses its power, only because it presides over criminals.  John Rambo also dies.

This shouldn’t discourage you from reading the book.  Rambo is the shit.

The movie:

How could you abuse a face like that?

The movie sticks to its guns throughout just about everything, from conveying a strong sympathetic view of Rambo and a negative view of the sheriff’s department, right up to the climactic battles in the trees.  The only problem?  Rambo blows everything up at the end.

Why it was a stupid change:

Not so much a stupid change, I suppose, as it was a sleazy change.  After all, if Rambo dies, how would they make cash cow sequels?  I am of the opinion that if something is meant to be told in one go, then it should be.  It if is meant to have sequels then so be it.  I just hated seeing Rambo raped by Hollywood and Stallone for so long.

Though I woulnd't mind owning this figure

Did they fix it?:  As far as I understand, the uncut ending is on the DVD.

Blade Runner

The Book:

Blade Runner is based off of Phillip K. Dick’s Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? Being a big fan of the man’s work, you know I am a sucker for good sci-fi and this book has it.  It’s all about an android bounty hunter named Rick Deckard (damn that is a cool name) who is charged with the task of “retiring” or shutting down six escaped Nexus-6 androids that are capable of showing human emotions.  As he tracks them down, Rick asks himself what qualifies being a human and if having emotions gives the androids the right to seek a quality of life.

The movie:

The movie originally kept the book’s ending, because Ridley Scott is awesome, where the android that Rick is illegally harboring, and falling in love with, will be put into the “sheepless sleep of death”.  Basically, it’s something of a bittersweet conclusion, like a lot of science fiction (think District 9).  The studio, deciding this was too bleak, changed the ending where it is revealed that she doesn’t have the program to self-terminate and they live happily ever after, thus crushing the entire reason anyone should read or watch the god damned thing.

Did they fix it?:  They released the original uncut ending, along with several other cuts of it on a super sexy box set, all for the low, low price of $78.99.

…Just read the damn book.

Smooth talk

I spy, with my little eye, a serial rapist

The book short story:

Smooth Talk is based off of the short story Where are you going, where have you been? by Joyce Carol Oats.  In it, a young girl named Connie is obsessed with acting like an adult and hanging out with the older kids and is subsequently stalked, raped and then killed.

The movie:

The same thing happens, with some embellishments and development to spread the story over two hours.  Then we get to the ending and Connie is just raped.  I know that sounds terrible, but the original impact of the story is that Connie is dead.  It makes the rereading chilling.  The first time you read it you don’t even notice the first line which states “Her name was Connie…”  By removing her death, the movie has something of a sweet conclusion where, in typical teen movie fashion, Connie is more grown up and accepting of her parents and sister.  Way to sugar coat rape, there, guys.

Rape is a great way to help young girls grow into womanhood and understand parental motivations.

Did they fix it?:  Nope.  The short story isn’t long.  Go read it.

Apocalypse Now

The book:

Apocalypse Now is based off of the incredibly famous Joseph Conrad novella Heart of Darkness, where a man named Marlow is sent up the Congo River to retrieve a rogue named Kurtz who has, essentially, stopped doing his job for an ivory transport company.  During his journey, Marlow encounters brutal slavery, cannibalism and the death of comrades.  Upon reaching Kurtz’s camp, Marlow realizes that the man has become a god of the people there, despite being close to death and gives Marlow the opportunity to take up the mantle.

The movie:

Instead of the Congo, the movie takes place in Vietnam as Willard is charged with the task of finding Kurtz and killing him.  During his journey upriver he comes across soldiers who have lost their minds and are shooting at nothing, innocent civilians gunned down during mass confusion, and a crazed leader who orders soldiers to surf in the middle of a battle.

You crazy man, you crazy!

This all leads to Willard finally finding Kurtz and getting the exact same offer.  In the original ending of the film, Willard agrees to it and takes up the mantle as king.

Did they fix it?:  Actually yes.  They scrapped the ending and instead have Willard killing Kurtz, Kurtz whispers the iconic line “the horror, the horror” and Willard leaves as The End by The Doors plays over the credits.  So I guess this is more of a movie that almost jacked up the last few minutes.

Para todos aquellos que creían que los Pokemones serían una moda pasajera cuales Tamagochis piratas, les tenemos una noticia. Estaban equivocados. Cumpliendo su décimo aniversario, esta semana tendremos como invitados especiales a los fundadores del famoso club Pokemex, listos para contestar toda clase de preguntas sobre el fenómeno creado por Nintendo y liderado por una pequeña rata amarilla conocida como Pikachu. Además de promocionar el próximo torneo! – Esto sin dejar atrás el evento de lanzamiento del nuevo Mario Bros para Wii y un poco de Campus Party, además de retomar la entrevista telefónica a Sergio Nakasune, organizador del festival de los 400 años de relaciones entre México y Japón. Prepárense para el Floppy más cargado del año!

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Esse eu gostaria de assistir. O melhor do cinema nacional, a história verídica de um playboy viciado somados a uma M60 e comunistas explodindo! Perfeito!

There are a lot of details out on the web right now about the changing course of the new Rambo movie. From this dork’s perspective, as the news developed there was a lot of happiness and a lot of sadness. This has been a roller coaster ride of action and suspense. But it appears that the most recent news is completely inconclusive…is Stallone caving to the pressure of fans and critics…why start now, you made Rambo IV for crying out loud. I believe this would have been a clear signal to film critics and business that you were not really interested in what they think.

So the questions are simple…Stallone…you gonna break?
Fellow dorks…you up to speed on the changing story?

Follow the jump to learn a bit more!

Let’s paint a quick chronology:

First, 2008, the return…Rambo IV! Not sure what you other dorks thought about the last Rambo flick, but I felt it delivered in all the right departments in the Rambo Shopping Mall. You know like action, blood, death, flying body parts, jungles, steaming gun muzzles! If you have not seen this movie and dig action, I highly recommend it, here is a taste…

Second, August 2009, the announcement…Rambo V: The Savage Hunt! Hell, I think you can make the same movie 20 times and I will still dig it…I mean how can you screw up blood uncontrollable action. Just change up some villains, victims, and the sweaty scenery and you got a whole new 90 minute experience.

Apparently it was originally announced by Variety that Rambo V was going to be about John Rambo navigating his way through human traffickers and drug lords to rescue a young girl abducted near the U.S.-Mexico border. Sounds simple enough to me, and according to CNN there is no more a dangerous locale on Earth right now than at the U.S.-Mexico border and no more villainous scum as the drug cartel. If CNN’s Michael Ware reports from this place…it is like the most god forsaken recipe for death you could ever encounter.

Third, September2009, more details on The Savage Hunt! Stallone comes out with an announcement about part V being basically Predator with John Rambo in the Arnold part…yeah, you got it…a savage hunt for a beast! Here is the synopsis that was floating around the web…

John Rambo could track anyone – or anything – on earth. Now the military desperately needs him for a mission that his ultrasensitive instincts tell him he should refuse. A beast is loose somewhere north of the Artic Circle. It has already decimated a secret research facility and annihilated a squad of elite military guards. And the raging creature is headed south toward civilization, ready to wreak bloody devastation.

It’s a job that Rambo and his 22-year-old hunting partner, Beau Brady, can’t turn down, but they and a team of highly-skilled special forces kill team discover that the prey is a terror beyond their wildest imagination – a half-human abomination created by a renegade agency through a series of outlawed genetic experiments. It has man’s cunning, a predator’s savageness, and a prehistoric power that has transcended the ages. And even if Rambo and Beau survive its unrelenting hunger for human blood, they’ll still have to confront the grim reality that it may have grown immortal.

I realize that this kind of story can be pretty polarizing to the Rambo fan base (if there is one), but hell with them. I thought this concept was awesome. Kind of like if you had a couple parts Predator and Watchers and mixed it with some traditional Rambo bad ass action…and blood…and beasts! Yeah!

Fourth, November 2009, change of plans, WTF?!??! So it seems that the August announcement triggers some negative reactions among the fans and so Stallone comes out and releases this completely cryptic and uncertain announcement. According to MovieWeb.com, Stallone announced:

“I’m letting you know that Rambo has changed course and the story about hunting the man/beast will be done using another character in the lead. RAMBO himself will be heading over the border to a violent city where many young women have vanished”

What the hell does this mean? Is this going to happen in the same movie? How the hell do you pull that off? This sounds like to two places and two leads…that sure adds up two movies in my mind. And why the wavering on the original plot Sylvester? You chicken, can’t take it? I seem to remember this quote from Rocky!

“The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t how hard you hit; it’s about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. How much you can take, and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done.”

Shit man, take a queue from your own words and keep moving forward with your vision of Rambo vs. Beast! What do the readers think? Drop us a line in the comments we would love to hear what you have to say.

Well, regardless, the movie got the green light to start up in the Spring of 2010 and is slated for a 2011 release. And maybe, just maybe, there will be another course correction by Stallone and he will try to get Weird Al for the lead role to complete the epic Rambo parody that started in UHF!

Haz click a la imagen para verla al detalle

De acuerdo a lo que declaró Sylvester Stallone en una reciente entrevista, la nueva entrega de Rambo, que llevará por título Rambo: The Savage Hunt, tendrá elementos de ciencia ficción en la trama. Según lo que adelantó, el gobierno creará un programa para crear supersoldados, pero algunos de los resultados son aberraciones altamente peligrosas. Cuando una de estas criaturas escapa, es cuando su personaje interviene. La misma se espera pueda ser lanzada para el 2011, y estará arrancando la filmación para el primer trimestre del año próximo.

Pre-Production is when the filmmakers and Producers have been green lit to make a film and are finishing the script, gathering funds, casting and hiring. There is a good chance the film will be made at this point, though until it’s in post-production, there is never any guarantee. And sometimes there’s no guarantee it will be released even when it’s completely finished.

But, on IMDB Pro, here are some of the films listed as in Pre-Production:

Saw 7 - In 3D! (I’m not kidding.)

Beverly Hills Chihuahua 2

Wanted 2

Lethal Weapon 5

Kung Fu Panda 2

Rambo 5: The Savage Hunt

Scream 4 (Do you see a theme with sequels? There are plenty more coming.)

The Three Stooges - with Benicio Del Toro as Moe and Paul Giamatti as Larry. Sean Penn was originally Larry, but dropped out. I loved the Three Stooges growing up, but I’m shocked at the quality of actors they are getting. This may actually be pretty good.

Total Recall – This is still in the script phase. The original film with Arnold Schwarzenegger is super cool. They better not cast someone like Vin Diesel in the lead role.

Red Sonja - Rose McGowen starts, but her boyfriend Robert Rodriguez is not directing, only producing this film. I’m a Rodriguez fan, but with him not at the helm, I’m uncertain about this film. I’m not a big McGowen fan.

20,000 Leagues Under The Sea: Sam Worthington from Terminator is Captain Nemo. There’s potential here.

My Fair Lady - A remake to star Kiera Knightley as Eliza Dolittle. She looks the part (Audrey Hepburn played the part in the original film, though she didn’t sing.) Can Kiera sing? Guess we’ll see. Wonder who will play Professor Higgins? An interesting note: Emma Thompson is writing the screenplay.

Spring Awakening - A very successful new musical. I’m very curious to see who will be cast. The girl from Glee was in the original Broadway production. Maybe she has a shot.

Mary the Mother of Christ - with Al Pacino as Herod. Oh, the jokes, the jokes…

The Warriors – A remake Benny is super excited about. No news on casting yet. Probably will be mostly unknowns.

Hamlet - Another one? This one with Emile Hirsch. The Speed Racer guy? He better have the acting chops for this or it could be a disaster. I am always interested in who will be Ophelia. Kate Winslet rocked it in Kenneth Branagh’s version and the best part of the Mel Gibson one was Helena Bonham Carter’s Ophelia.

Jack and Jill - with Adam Sandler playing both parts. Was Jim Carrey busy?

Excalibur - Bryan Singer is doing this film. Love him. The Usual Suspects is an all time favorite of mine and I love the King Arthur mythology. However, the original Excalibur film is awesome, so I’m not sure what Singer can bring to the story. No casting news yet. I wonder if they will remake Camelot the musical too?

Battlestar Galactica- I’m a huge fan of this series and I’d love to see a film version. Right now Bryan Singer is also slated to direct this, though it looks like it’s a long way from being a done deal.

Warcraft - Directed by Sam Raimi, this could be fun.

No mínimo é curioso ver Rambo. O carisma de Sylvester Stallone na  tela do cinema. A tradição deste ator na interpretação de um personagem muito exigente. Um personagem que, por sua vez, não exige muito de um ator. Estamos no campo do carisma pura e simplesmente. Não há muito o que dizer a respeito sobre o dom da performance dramática. Eis um tipo de coisa que se pode discutir somente quando o próprio filme a reinvindica.

Mas ainda assim estamos no campo do cinema e aqui, em particular, da evolução de um de seus maiores símbolos. Cunhado a princípio como um personagem, o vetereno de guerra do Vietnã, abandonado pelo seu próprio país e entregue a humilhação, assume diversas faces no decorrer de sua saga. Falarei de cada episódio mais adiante mas começando por este Rambo IV ou, simplesmente, John Rambo.

John Rambo é o título do filme. Começa destacando o herói-de-guerra como ser humano através de seu nome real. Está no centro do que existe na guerra entre os povos: a ajuda humanitária. Não é arma ideológica. A ficção violenta do cinema imita com perfeição as amputações, mutilações e assassinatos cometidos nas guerras do mundo real. Um verossímel herói-de-guerra que sobrevive a um lugar aonde milhares morreram termina assim como ele sempre foi. Um herói.

Este é o futuro de John Rambo. Que me desculpem os preconceituosos.

Assista o trailler

A while back Sylvester Stallone revealed some story details for his upcoming action sequel. It was going to be Rambo vs some kind of genetic beastie (more here), but now it seems the story has changed a bit. Sylvester Stallone spoke to AICN and he gave some updates on the story of Rambo V: A Savage Hunt.

I’m letting you know that Rambo has changed course and the story about hunting the man/beast will be done using another character in the lead. RAMBO himself will be heading over the border to a violent city where many young women have vanished

There will be blood.

Best,
Sly Stallone

Sly Stallone sent over a change in script details to Craig at Latino Review concerning John Rambo’s latest jungle prey.

To all the loyal SZoners out there,

Best,
Sly Stallone

Smart move, we weren’t looking to see Stallone in a Predator moment.

ランボー５は「Hunter」をベースにしたSF風なものになることが決定だと思っていましたが、またまた新展開がありました。

StalloneZoneにスライ自身がメールをしたそうです。それによると半人間/猛獣を追跡するストーリーは別のキャラクターが主役の別の物語で映画化するとのこと。ランボー５は女性の誘拐が頻繁におこるバイオレントな町でおこる物語になるようです。

ファンの間で長い間映画化されてほしいと要望のあった「Hunter」がついに実現することと、ランボーが落ち着くところに落ち着いたファンにとっては一石二鳥の展開ではないでしょうか？　これからもスライに楽しませてもらえそうです。　

しかしスライからじきじきにメールもらえるStalloneZoneは偉大なファンサイトですね。これまでの功績から考えると当然かもしれませんが。うらやましいです。

I doubt i have much chance to forget really because it gets rammed down my throat every year for about 3 months.

There are varying degrees of debate about what Kipling actually meant when he produced this, oh so famous, line in the poem, as there are with most poems from this era because the majority of the poets were fucked on acid and didn’t actually know themselves. It is commonly suspected that it was in reference to the ‘Ultimate sacrifice’ of those who did not return but were left in the hands of the enemy, and has since just become a catchphrase for more or less anything to do with war ‘victims’ dead or maimed in the line of duty.

Anyhoo, one thing that is certain, it is designed to make us feel proud. Proud to be British. Proud to still be defending our great nation against the tyrants. Dare i say it – proud to not be one of them.

Do not mistake me for one of the ‘Jesus wouldn’t join the military’ tree huggers but i can’t be arsed with all the other side of the coin either that tells me i should mourn for dead folk i didn’t know. Am i just meant to remember the dead british folk? Or can i also use the silence to think about the other dead folk that killed the british dead folk and subsequently got deaded themself afterwards by our british heroes?
Heroes! Remember our dead heroes? If they were that fucking heroic they wouldn’t be dead would they?

Lack of equipment? Rambo had a lot less equipment and he killed fucking thousands on his own.

I wouldn’t go as far as saying they can fuck right off but the people who now jump on the bandwagon and want me to join their Facebook clan to show i care – they can definitely fuck right off.

Rambo I II III IV (DvDrip, eng – ) Complete

TiTLE……[ First Blood
> AKA........[ Rambo: First Blood
> YEAR.......[ 1982
> GENRE......[ Action | Thriller | War
> RUNTiME....[ 01:29:19
> iMDB RATE..[ 7.3/10 (39,739 votes)
> iMDB URL...[ http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0083944/
AUDiO......[ MP3 48000Hz 128 kb/s CBR (2 chnls)
> LANGUAGE...[ English
> ViDEO......[ 962 kbps XviD 25.000 FPS
> RESOLUTiON.[ 700 x 296
> DAR........[ 2.365 (26:11)
> SUBS.......[ None
> SiZE.......[ 700 MB
> SOURCE.....[ DVD]

http://hotfile.com/dl/13739659/ae98394/Rambo.First.Blood.I_1982_DvDrip-aXXo.part1.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13739734/9558f7c/Rambo.First.Blood.I_1982_DvDrip-aXXo.part2.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13739823/63db99c/Rambo.First.Blood.I_1982_DvDrip-aXXo.part3.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13739901/0396f5c/Rambo.First.Blood.I_1982_DvDrip-aXXo.part4.rar.html


TiTLE……[ Rambo: First Blood Part II
YEAR.......[ 1985
> GENRE......[ Action | Thriller | War
> RUNTiME....[ 01:31:39
> iMDB RATE..[ 5.6/10 (27,314 votes)
> iMDB URL...[ http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089880/
AUDiO......[ MP3 48000Hz 128 kb/s CBR (2 chnls)
> LANGUAGE...[ English
> ViDEO......[ 935 kbps XviD 25.000 FPS
> RESOLUTiON.[ 700 x 296
> DAR........[ 2.386 (31:13)
> SUBS.......[ None
> SiZE.......[ 701 MB
> SOURCE.....[ DVD]

http://hotfile.com/dl/13739941/bf6447b/Rambo.First.Blood.Part.II_1985_DvDrip-aXXo.part1.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13740036/d8ee457/Rambo.First.Blood.Part.II_1985_DvDrip-aXXo.part2.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13740124/172fcb3/Rambo.First.Blood.Part.II_1985_DvDrip-aXXo.part3.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13740140/e2af9f1/Rambo.First.Blood.Part.II_1985_DvDrip-aXXo.part4.rar.html

> F i L E i N F O

> TiTLE……[ Rambo III
> YEAR…….[ 1988
> GENRE……[ Action | Thriller | War
> RUNTiME….[ 01:37:01
> iMDB RATE..[ 4.7/10 (22,302 votes)
> iMDB URL…[ http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0095956/
AUDiO……[ MP3 48000Hz 128 kb/s CBR (2 chnls)
> LANGUAGE…[ English
> ViDEO……[ 876 kbps XviD 25.000 FPS
> RESOLUTiON.[ 692 x 290
> DAR……..[ 2.386 (31:13)
> SUBS…….[ None
> SiZE…….[ 701 MB
> SOURCE…..[ DVD

http://hotfile.com/dl/13740199/1ca3961/Rambo.III_1988_DvDrip-aXXo.part1.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13740226/4418cd6/Rambo.III_1988_DvDrip-aXXo.part2.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13740264/1dba88f/Rambo.III_1988_DvDrip-aXXo.part3.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13740278/8019f1f/Rambo.III_1988_DvDrip-aXXo.part4.rar.html

F i L E i N F O
>

> TiTLE……[ Rambo
> AKA……..[ Rambo IV, John Rambo
> YEAR…….[ 2008
> GENRE……[ Action | Thriller | War
> RUNTiME….[ 01:27:10
> iMDB RATE..[ 7.4/10 (55,602 votes)
> iMDB URL…[ http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0462499/
AUDiO……[ MP3 48000Hz 160 kb/s CBR (2 chnls)
> LANGUAGE…[ English
> ViDEO……[ 957 kbps XviD 25.000 FPS
> RESOLUTiON.[ 652 x 356
> DAR……..[ 1.831 (11:6)
> SUBS…….[ Hardcoded
> SiZE…….[ 701 MB
> SOURCE…..[ DVD

http://hotfile.com/dl/13740321/471d89b/Rambo_2008_DvDrip-aXXo.part1.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13740384/1e2759d/Rambo_2008_DvDrip-aXXo.part2.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13740408/57d410e/Rambo_2008_DvDrip-aXXo.part3.rar.html
http://hotfile.com/dl/13740431/5f9e422/Rambo_2008_DvDrip-aXXo.part4.rar.html

Efter att ha ratat Slumdog Millionaire som bästa film år 2008 ställde supercoola Booby den högst berättigade frågan: Vilken var då bästa filmen år 2008?

I min bok var det tre filmer som konkurrerar om den titeln. Överlag var -08 ett väldigt bra filmår, men de som motsvarat mina kriterier och krav är följande:

The Dark Knight

Kanske ett tråkigt val, men det finns egentligen inget dåligt att säga om TDK. Christopher Nolan visade med Batman Begins att superhjältefilmer är perfekt grund för stora frågor och mörker. Med TDK tar han allt flera steg längre, med frågor som om vilka friheter en självutnämnd superhjälte ska kunna ta och vilket värde människor egentligen har. Är en brottslings liv mindre värt än vanliga människors? Är en brottslings liv mer värt än ens eget?

Att Heath Ledger dessutom är bättre än vad man ens kunde föreställa sig var möjligt som Jokern är också en viktig faktor. Äntligen får Batman en riktig antagonist.

The Dark Knight är perfekt. Rakt igenom.

Burn After Reading

Jag är ett stort fan av bröderna Coen och jag är helt övertygad om att de inte kan misslyckas. Även om de inte alltid lyckats, har de likt förbaskat aldrig misslyckats. Lite motsägelsefullt kanske, men allt är inte alltid som det verkar.

I Burn After Reading är allt helt galet. Ingen vet något om någon eller något och Brad Pitt är bara korkad. Och rolig. Varenda scen med Brad innebär en stor skrattorkan. George Clooneys uppfinningsrikedom tillhör också en av många höjdpunkter.

Enligt mig ett komiskt mästerverk utan någon svag punkt. En solklar femma!

Rambo

Jag förstår om vissa tycker den fjärde Rambofilmen bara är en ursäkt för att få visa mycket våld och samtidigt håva in en jädra massa pengar.

Jag kan dock inte hålla med. Sylvester Stallone är ett geni och med hjälp av lätta medel berättar han om den gamle Rambo, som flytt till Thailand efter att hans hemland svikit honom gång på gång. Han har ingen tilltro till världen överhuvudtaget och har gett upp allt sorts hopp.

Men så kommer ett gäng missionärer fulla av hopp och vilja att förändra för nödställda människor i krigshärjade Burma. Olyckligtvis går det snett och de blir tillfångatagna.

Rambo bestämmer sig för att han inte kan sitta bredvid och titta på, så tillsammans med ett gäng tuffa legosoldater beger han sig in i Burmas täta skog för att befria missionärerna. Det blir en (utan dess like) blodig kamp där tuff verkligen skiljs från tuff och där Rambo ännu en gång tvingas göra upp med sig själv.

Det är en adrenalin- såväl som känslotripp vid varje tittning. I min bok har den allt.

Som sagt, jag förstår att andra ser bristerna. Jag ser dem också, men jag är väldigt förlåtande när det gäller Sly.

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Man kan nog dra många slutsatser om både mig som person och min filmsmak med hjälp av dessa tre filmer, men det får någon annan stå för. Vicky Cristina Barcelona, Revolutionary Road och The Curious Case of Benjamin Button tillhör även favoriterna från 2008.

Sylvester Stallone, wrote an open letter to Stallonezone fans, announcing that he has changed the story to, “Rambo V”. Sly says to his fans that he won’t be doing the plot mixed with sci-fi, where Rambo hunts down this half human and half monster.

Sly is doing the plot where Rambo goes to a border to find missing women that disappeared from America. He’s going back to the plot idea he had before.

Read it here:

http://stallonezone.com/wordpress/?p=1847

Sly obviously reads the internet, quite a lot if he is sitting here reading feedback by people. Sly said in the letter he is a supporter of the Stallonezone fan site, so he obviously reads the message board daily, noticing he says, “Szoners”.

I like the finding missing women plot better than the sci fi idea. I like both plot ideas, but Rambo finding missing women seems more realistic though.

I’m glad Sly says there will be blood and it’s going to be a hard R rating like the last Rambo.

Sly’s a good man, he knows what his fans wants and I love how he pays attention to them!

Kev

Il Parlamento vuole che Berlusconi chiarisca alla camera se ci è andato o meno con Noemi o con altre gentili signore di bocca… buona . Ora figuratevi che scena pietosa si presenterebbe agli occhi degli italiani se ammettesse la cosa. Quelli della destra e della sinistra con le mani sulla patta dei pantaloni a confermare che gli “estremi si toccano” e fuori dal parlamento si fanno toccare. Silvio che descrive luoghi, circostanze e poi parte dai preliminari. Una voce della sinistra che spazientita e vogliosa grida – I fatti, signor Presidente! Vogliamo i fatti!- e tutti a mormorare il loro dissenso verso il collega che toglierebbe il patos mentre la camera  cala nella penombra e sui banchi compaiono abat-jours e telefoni intercomunicanti. Poi la descrizione delle varie posizioni assunte, compatibilmente con l’artrosi che a settantadue anni suonati c’è, e come! Infine la descrizione dell’orgasmo raggiunto e giù un applauso da stadio e fischi all’americana con tanto di accendini accesi che oscillano da parte del PDL. Un trionfo dei sensi in tutti i sensi mentre Bersani i sensi li perde nuovamente dopo che li aveva persi alla guida di un partito senza senso. Vespa subito a scrivere un altro libro dal titolo “ il Kamasutra secondo Silvio” e  Marrazzo a scrivere il “ Ka… m’hanno incastrato”.

Obama non ha di questi problemi (con una moglie come Michelle gli sganassoni se li prende a due a due fino a quando non diventano dispari) però si è incavolato molto perché non sapeva di avere Rambo a Fort Hood nelle vesti di un medico di origine giordana e pure musulmano (ma dove se li vanno a capare?) che ha fatto una carneficina con ben tredici morti e trentuno feriti di cui alcuni gravi. È proprio vero che la realtà molte volte supera la fantasia come nel caso delle Twin Towers ma è altrettanto vero che se gli americani dopo la seconda guerra mondiale non hanno più vinto un conflitto un motivo c’è, e ce l’hanno in casa.

L’OCSE ha detto che l’Italia è in ripresa e Berlusconi ha affermato che siamo il sesto paese più ricco della terra. Mi sa tanto che abito in un altro mondo oppure l’OCSE mi deve dire dove si ubriaca la sera. Ve la ricordate la statistica del pollo per ogni abitante? C’è chi ne mangia dieci e ci sono dieci abitanti che non vedono neanche le penne del pollo. Il Cavaliere dice che gli italiani sono ottimisti.

Questa certezza conferma la mia certezza di non essere italiano, al massimo un immigrato in attesa di cittadinanza. Il mio ottimismo poi crolla quando penso ai due progetti di questo governo: Banca del Mezzogiorno (forse perché a quell’ora si mangia?) e Ponte sullo Stretto di Messina ( se non frana prima!). Io sarò pure non italiano e magari pure sospettoso ma credo che in fila, davanti alla Banca del Mezzogiorno, vedremo società “onorate”, capi cosca, N’drangheta, Camorra con i casalesi in testa, assessori di vari comuni. Un bel modo per pagare e far stare buono un certo elettorato. Poco tempo fa guardando una tv privata ho letto un cartello che diceva “Benvenuti a Casal di Principe, sotto il quale qualche buontempone ha aggiunto…”abbasta che nun scassate ‘a mazza”. Un chiaro invito a farsi gli affari propri!

Per tornare ai polli, tra tanta confusione e disinformazione strategica ecco uno che ci rassicura e dice che presto l’aviaria si unirà con la suina e allora ci sarà da ridere. Io l’unico modo che conosco di mettere insieme un maiale e una pollastrella è dentro un letto. Scegliete voi la… “camera”.

Claudio Pompi

Basescu nu a mai reusit sa gasesca un slogan de campanie convingator astfel incat a inventat un referendum justitiar.

Asta e toata campania lui Basescu la presedentie: “Eu, Rambo, contra lor. Voteaza-l pe Rambo.”

Lui Mimi ii este frica ca in urmatorii 5 ani tot Rambo va fi presedinte. Cu asemenea clipuri de campanie ar fi imposibil sa nu fie ales:

I’ve finally made the big time! Fred Crow used my suggestion for “Lambo”!

I'll never be sheared again.

“I know you know that rage inside,” Garth insisted. “I know that no matter how positive you try to be when someone drops their plate of problems on you that you want nothing more than to rip their heads off and then rip their legs off and stick the legs through the neck hole.”

A flicker behind Lily’s eyes told Garth that he was right. But when she spoke, she did so insistently. “What good would wishing for violence do? It would consume me from within and do nothing to anyone who wronged me. The only weapon that we have against people like that is forgiveness.”

Garth genuinely didn’t mean to be rude, but he guffawed hysterically anyway.

“I mean it!” Lily demanded. “You can’t change what other people do, you can only change how you react to it.”

“I didn’t mean to…” Garth stammered. “I mean, we have a higher standard of respect here. It’s just that, you know, Conan the Barbarian doesn’t carry a plus-three sword of forgiveness. There’s no forgiveness rays, or forgiveness sabers, and Rambo doesn’t invade Vietnam armed with a forgivenessthrower.”

“Not even a light forgiveness shield,” piped in Johnathan, who had apparently been listening to the conversation even though the machete he was sharpening should have consumed all of his attention.

“I’m just saying, anger doesn’t have much of an application.”

“I’m sorry, Lily,” Garth said, finally stumbling upon the phrase recommended by etiquette. “I shouldn’t have laughed. I do have to dispute with you, though.”

Lily already recognized Garth’s social awkwardness. She silently accepted his apology, and invited him to continue.

“I suppose your theory is even right, as far as it goes. But it’s not complete. You have no children—“

“I don’t, but how did you know?”

Johnathan chortled. He had watched Garth fumble through this section before, but it never got old. It was a big part of why he enjoyed this particular task so much.

Garth, cursed at himself silently, but visibly. “I apologize once again. There is no easy way to identify people who belong in our group, so we do spend quite a bit of time observing potential candidates. I assure you, we will not use the information in any way, regardless of whether you join us or not.”

“And what exactly is your group?”

Johnathan clapped slowly and sarcastically at Garth.

“Lily, please,” Garth pleaded. “I—I will explain, but it will be easier if we go with this example first. Okay?”

Garth seemed so much lower than Lily. She was somehow looking down at him, despite him being at least a half a foot taller than her, and he was looking back up, and moreover he was looking back up with such earnestness that Lily had no choice but to accept.

*****

So, this is a bit from Receptacle, which is a bit down the line on my project list, but one that I’m excited by. Without giving too much away, the backstory is that Garth (and Johnathan, in his way) are trying to recruit Lily for… well, they’re trying to recruit her for something. I guess it’s not the most backstory I’ve ever given out, eh?

Q: How many ears does Captain Kirk have?
A: Three. The left ear, the right ear, and the final frontier.

On Saturday evening, Jed and I went to MarkJ’s house, where his brother supplied the latest Star Trek movie. It was an amusing, entertaining film, and if you think I’m only saying that because I don’t know MarkJ’s brother well enough to slag off his taste in movies, I appreciate your dilemma. You’ll have to use your discretion. Sorry.

Star Trek 2009 is a reboot of the Star Trek franchise, telling the back-story of the crew and the series of flukes via which James Tiberius Kirk comes to be captain of the Starship Enterprise.

No idea what the plot is about. It involves a fleet of Romulans. I’m not sure why the producers didn’t choose more compelling intergalactic villains for the franchise premiere – for example, the horny-headed Klingons; or the terrifyingly ridiculous-looking and inalienly strong Gorn. But there you go.

Anyhoo, the Romulans pootle around the universe applying impressive special effects to planets. Apart from that, even Eric Bana’s freakishly small head fails to make the Romulans look the least bit threatening. They have no exoskeletal anomalies, no surplus proboscises, no multiple recessed jaws; they are even a standard Caucasian colour. Although their blood is greenish-yellow, there isn’t half enough of it splattering about the set.

I suppose they do have impressive cranial tattoos – but then so do lots of people – I mean, it’s hardly chillingly blood-crawling.

Q: How many Star Trek landing party members does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one, but the extra red-shirt will die in the attempt

The movie introduces Kirk as a foetus, and unfortunately the character does not appear to mature in any measurable way throughout the course of the movie apart from a rudimentary mastery of his motor functions. Impossible as it may seem, Chris Pine’s incarnation of Kirk made me wistfully yearn for William Shatner.

Even Uhura, embarking on her mission to boldly sleep her way to the top, keeps Kirk firmly at bargepole’s length. Which tells you all you REALLY need to know.

But since you asked nicely, I will of course tell you more.

Kirk is so whiny and boisterously annoying, you want to ground him until he reaches adulthood – about 20 years. The only new life forms he is interested in seeking out are the female variety (demonstrating a disturbing fetish for bottle-green redheads).

Q: Does Kirk become the first cadet in the history of the Academy to outwit the Kobayashi Maru Simulation with his blistering intelligence and encyclopaedic knowledge of Klingon war strategy?
A: No, Kirk CHEATS.

Q: Following his suspension from the Academy, does Kirk unexpectedly disguise himself as the First Officer and blag his way on board the USS Enterprise?
A: No, he is smuggled aboard by his friend.

Q: Does Kirk detect a Romulan trap using his powers of deduction and encyclopaedic knowledge of Romulan war tactics?
A: No; by pure chance, he overhears Uhura talking about it in her underwear (although the fact that he recalls the information at all with Uhura clad only in her underwear is undeniably admirable).

Even worse, Kirk’s bravery does not translate to skilled combat.

Q: When a Romulan is stamping on Kirk’s fingers as the rest of him hangs from the edge of a drilling platform, does Kirk lunge for his assailant’s ankle and pull himself back onto the platform while simultaneously hurling the Romulan to his death?
A: No, Sulu saves Kirk’s dangling ass with a timely sword thrust.

Q: When another Romulan is in the process spanking Kirk with nothing more than his fists and a big sneer, does Kirk distract him with a talking newt before bludgeoning the Romulan’s head to a fine paste with his thumbs?
A: No, he pulls the Romulan’s own gun on him.

And this is the permanently pubescent person chosen to explore strange new worlds, seek out new life and new civilizations and boldly pilot the USS Enterprise where no man has gone before.

In fact, the only positive character attribute exhibited by Kirk is a totally unfounded bravery.

Well, Kirk might be brave, but so is Rambo, and I wouldn’t hand the reins of the Starship Enterprise over to him.

Although I would if the only alternative was Kirk.

The vaunted friendship between Kirk and Spock is made possible only by virtue of Spock’s paucity of emotion.

For some reason, the story features two Spocks. Obviously, this is a good thing – but replacing Kirk with Spock altogether would have been better still.

Spock’s ears appear to have been ‘modernised’ into immobile wax sculptures on either side of his head. Why? WHY? What was wrong with Spock’s original aural devices? I’ll tell you what: NOTHING. Spock’s ears used to be sublime perfection: those delicate pinnacles of silicon pointiness that looked like they might fly off into the control console at the slightest hint of turbulence; that, when you flicked them with your index finger, made a satisfying thwippety thwippety sound that resulted in a cochleal orgasm.

Q: How can you improve on that?
A: You can’t.

Terrific movie; well worth a watch.