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Forget meteors and zombies — Giant rabbits are world's biggest threat

As a journalist, I’m trained to recognize the most subtle signs of trouble:

A misspoken word.

A reluctant glance.

A horde of slobbering rabbits.

Thanks to my training and experience, and several highlighted newspaper clippings sent in by concerned readers, I have painstakingly pieced together what I, as a member of the conservative media, believe is undeniable evidence that rabbits are planning to take over the world. 437 more words

Humor

Passive/aggressive problem solving worth a Long Awkward Pause

It’s Saturday! And as if that wasn’t enough good news, I’m with the rest of the staff over at Long Awkward Pause commenting on the… 274 more words

Humor

Is there such a thing as too much climaxing? (In your manuscript, Jeez!)

For those visiting for the first time because of the search term “climax,” welcome to Ned’s Nickel’s Worth on Writing! This weekly feature is when I share the writing wisdom gained from 15 years as a columnist by — much like a porn movie — quickly stripping things down to the bare essentials and offering techniques that hopefully lead to a lot of “oohing” and “awing.” It’s a weekly feature… 703 more words

Ned Hickson

It's official: Everyone wants to be cool

(What am I doing posting on a Thursday? It’s my turn over at Long Awkward Pause and the excitement is tangible! Or maybe it’s just arrhythmia…) 202 more words

Humor

Once the food in your refrigerator becomes self aware, no one is safe

As a tribute to my friend and fellow firefighter who is officially retiring today after 25 years, I’d like to offer this story from a few years ago as a testament to his bravery, dedication and complete lack of refrigerator cleanliness skills. 794 more words

Humor

As tans fade for Oregonians, risk of being mistaken for corpse increases

Before long, those of us who live here in the great Northwest are going to change. And when I say “change,” I don’t mean for the betterment of mankind. 650 more words

Humor

Six pizza-inspired inventions worth a Long Awkward Pause

Like every Saturday, I’m over at Long Awkward Pause with the rest of the gang making comments about The Saturday Six, which is a collection of six weird images that are related by theme. 94 more words

Humor