I enjoyed reading through most of your rules, Nifer.  Luckily I have never encountered someone talking on speaker phone in public, because I’d most likely owe them $100-200 (depending on what phone they have) after slapping out of their hand Manu Ginobili style. Also, since I try my best not to take dumps in public bathrooms, I’ve yet to encounter someone talking on the phone in a stall.  But for the most part, I agree with all you put out there, I mean honestly, nothing screams douchebag like a bluetooth earpiece (although I’m ok with someone using it while driving).  I do have a few exceptions.

First, some ringback tones can actually kind of be fun to listen to.  I never thought I much of them, but one of my friends has “Ain’t Too Proud to Beg” and I am almost upset when she answers.  Oh, it’s The Temptations version, not TLC.  Secondly, while I agree ringtones sound like shit compared with the real song, they are still more enjoyable to listen to then some bootleg tone nokia developed.  Also, I use one of my good friend’s bands song, so I feel like I’m helping advertise for him.  I do not agree with someone using a special ringtone for their significant other, unless it’s witty and funny, as opposed to forcing people to listen to “Right Here Waiting For You” by Richard Marx every time he/she calls.

My biggest disagreement comes with your rule for movies/class/etc.  Specifically, movies.  Turning your cell phone on vibrate is not enough.  Fuck it, even turning it on silent mode is not enough.  Turn it off*.  It amazes me that people can’t go two hours without checking their phone for messages or missed calls. You aren’t that important, whoever is trying to reach you isn’t waiting by the phone for a call or text back.  Leave it in the car, don’t be tempted.

*Of course, there are exceptions…Doctors on call, parents using a new babysitter for the first time, a drug dealer, etc.

I have one important rule to add, a slightly different take on your “face to face convo” rule.  If you are in a group setting, say…watching some football with a bunch of people, I fully embrace answering the phone if it is someone you wish to talk to.  However, leave the effing room.  While your phone call might be important to you, I assure you, it most likely isn’t to the rest of the group.  In addition, all you do is stifle conversation amongst the rest of the group, forcing us to resent you and most likely make fun of whatever it is you are saying.

Oh yeah, finally…”if you call someone and get voicemail, leave a message or don’t. Just don’t text, it’s gay” (movie quote alert).

TYR Comic Strip Ringback

TYR has just released several new prints in their Durafast Polyester swimsuit line.  One of the new prints is the Comic Strip Ringback.  The Comic Strip Ringback features a bright, exciting print and the ultimate in comfort due to it’s unique back.  The Ringback offers an adjustable ring that slides into place for flawless fit and comfort that you won’t find in other suits.

The Comic Strip Ringback is made of TYR’s Durafast Polyester material.  Durafast Polyester is proven to last three times longer than a traditional Lycra swimsuit.  Durafast Polyester is chlorine and sun resistant to prevent unwanted fading and stretching.  This suit is ideal for both training and recreational swimming.  The Comic Strip Ringback is available in adult and youth sizes, and multiple color combinations are also available so you can pick one that best suits you.  The Comic Strip Ringback is available now at D&J Sports.

I know that I, of all people, shouldn’t be complaining about phone music, considering how I subject every person who calls me to ringback tones that switch between the Super Mario Bros. theme song, chirping birds, and ribbiting frogs. But I’m currently on hold with the D-M-fucking-V so that I can take a stupid test to get my driver’s license replaced so that I can stop getting hassled every time I try to buy booze because my license is expired, and the “on hold” phone music is not only horrible, painful, repetitive, and mind-numbing, but it keeps cutting in and out as if it has bad reception or something, so I can’t even just phase it into the background because it’s inconsistent. I can only figure that the monumental assholes at the DMV have done this purposefully to make my day a little worse and to discourage people from remaining on the line and getting the necessary appointments.

Sometimes, you are smart enough to put your cellphone on vibrate mode while on the workplace.
Sometimes, you just forget to put it on silence, or just to turn it off while   working.
Sometimes, you are just plain stupid to put a ringtone and ringback tone with explicit lyrics and stupidly forget to turn it on silence and or vibrate.

This was the event earlier. For eight to ten seconds, my boring cellphone rung. Two doctors looked at me, like they wanted to eat me alive. LOL

Here are the lyrics of my ringback tone:

Stacks on deck [deck], Patron on ice [ice]
And we can pop bottles all night
Baby you can have whatever you like [if you like]
I said you can have whatever you like [if you like], yeah [yeah]
Late night sex, so wet, so tight [tight]
Gas up the jet for you tonight
And baby you can go wherever you like [if you like]
I said you can go wherever you like [if you like], yeah [yeah]

Embarrassing, really!

Not familiar with the song? Check this video (nsfw)!

So, please, please, please. Learn from my story, turn your god damn cellphone @ work!

In December, we already reported the decline of the ringtone market. Recent study by BMI predicts that this market will further decrease in 2008, generating approximately $510 million in the US. This is a 7% (or $40 million) decrease compared to 2007.

Better news is that ringback tones are gaining popularity. A ringback tone is a song that is performed to the caller when they call a participating mobile subscriber. BMI projects US sales of ringback tones to surpass $210 million in 2008, which is a lot higher than earlier predictions.

“The market for ringback tones has grown stronger than we originally forecasted last year,” said Richard Conlon, BMI Vice President, “As we forecasted last year, the ringtone market continues to decline as the novelty phase wears off and lower-priced substitutional products come to market.”

Press release

ok. ok. i GET it. apparently, NOBODY likes my ringback tone. and although i still stand by it, i have finally changed the song. and im pretty excited to annouce my selection:

Michael Jackson.

that’s right people. i AM cool.

and it’s not like i picked just one song. im so cool that i got five. and they rotate. 

so now when you call me you’ll get to hear one of these five songs:

1. Billie Jean – Michael Jackson
2. Beat It – Michael Jackson
3. Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’ – Michael Jackson
4. P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing) – Michael Jackson
5. Thriller – Michael Jackson

i know. i know. you can hardly wait! go ahead. call me. right now. i might even answer. or even BETTER, I’ll let it go to voice mail so you can hear the WHOLE song. you can thank me later.

While I have no doubt that I am outside the current target demographic, I have to say that the choices of ringback tones offered by Cingular really sucks. With a few exceptions of quotes from the movie “Office Space” there is just nothing there.

What would be cool is the ability to upload my own sound files as ringback tones. Can you say Royale with Cheese?

Tags: Cingular, Wireless.