They stand in line with arms full as they wait for the doors to open for the masquerade.  They hold rice, toast and newspaper among other odds and ends. They are dressed in their Halloween best – or worst – and most of them aren’t wearing very much at all.

They are the unknown minority, the freaks and weirdoes of an otherwise conservative Southern town. Two nights before All Hallow’s Eve, they gather around the doors of the historic Alabama Theatre for the annual Halloween Masquerade featuring a live performance to the film The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

The night’s hostess promised it would be a night celebrating “expression and debauchery and just being raunchy,” warning all those in attendance that they “better be fucking ready for it!”

If you’ve never been to the Rocky Horror ball in Birmingham, it is hard to be prepared. Every year, those who wish to celebrate Alabama’s most counterculture lifestyles gather to watch and perform the horror cult classic about a couple of normal, uptight kids who stumble upon a castle full of freaks after a car wreck in the rain. Oh, the inhabitants also happen to be a group of aliens from the planet Transsexual in the galaxy Transylvania, whose leader has taken their weapon technology to create his ideal young, hot stud. Yes, it is as dirty as it sounds.

The film gained cult status after being shown at midnight every night in a small New York theatre in the 1970s. Among those die-hard fans has emerged a subgroup, who enjoy dressing up to match the films out-of-this-world characters. This prompted the Alabama Theatre group to create a costume contest before the show, for both general admission (this years winner was Facebook, although Octomom really had a shot) and for those dressing as a character.

Eventually, weekly viewers began to act out the scenes in front of the camera – adding their own dose of shock value, and invented a kind of code to stick with the faithful fans worldwide. Certain phrases, when spoken on screen, elicit a response from the crowd. When Janet, the female “norm” says her name, the audience yells “slut!” When the films transsexual hero, Dr. Frank-n-furtur, proposes a toast over dinner, the crowd literally throws toast, and so on throughout the film.

If you haven’t seen the film, this isn’t the place to start. The film, and all of its hilarious little nuances, stands only in the background of the show. The real entertainment comes from the horrible actors on stage (certainly the only actors as bad as those onscreen) and the crowd itself.

And as the hostess suggested, it is not for the faint of heart. It begins with a sacrificing of the virgins (those who have never seen Rocky Horror live) which foretellingly ends in simulated sexual acts.

The props are horrible, the actors are constantly watching the screen to pick up their cues and the audio is out of sync, but none of that matters if the crowd is good. And man were they good. By the end of the night, everyone was covered in rice and toilet paper, as attendees brought props to spare. Everyone in attendance sang along, screamed along, and danced along throughout the night, the climax of which was the show’s most famous song, the “Time Warp.”

And while the performers themselves often seemed like a bunch of dirty-minded fourteen year olds, their lack of talent didn’t stop them from putting on a good show. They were most in their element when it came time to pop out one of many dildos or act out one of the movie’s more graphically violent moments, but they never forgot about their audience and community. The events of the film were made more topical, as references to Proposition 8 and local Birmingham corruption littered the performance.

As they filed out of the showing, the freaks and weirdoes were talking to each other. They sang together, and danced together, sometimes with strangers, and sometimes with friends. But they never recognized the difference. They are one in their love of something a little bit dirty, a little bit wrong, and just oh-so-perfect for those unconcerned with society.

Today I love…

1. Watching New Moon with the girls and squeeing over the many hot, shirtless men

2. Dinner at the Phoenix Cafe: a little expensive, but good food!

3. Swing quad!

4. Watching EC and LC perform at the Rocky Horror Picture Show–aaaaaah! SO FANTASTIC!

Every year, as the winter weather descends and the nights get longer and colder, I give into a particular urge: the urge to hibernate. I’ll be honest, once it drops below 50 degrees, I lose the motivation to go to the theater to get my musical fix. While others are out enjoying the icy chill and having snowball fights, I like to settle down with my Snuggie, a hot cup of cocoa and a great movie. And I wouldn’t be The Broadway Bostonian if I didn’t partake in a good movie musical occasionally. Movie musicals, like their theatrical counterparts, can be very hit or miss. So I’ve compiled a list of my Top Ten Favorite Movie Musicals. They might not be flawless, but they are perfect for a snowy night in on the couch with some takeout and a nice warm blanket.

#10 – Dr. Horrible’s Sing-A-Long Blog

With a running time of around 45 minutes, Dr. Horrible is really more of a study break musical than feature film. Like most of its fans, I found out about Dr. Horrible when it was released, in three parts via the web, during the summer of 2006. I watched the first segment, a 15-minute clip, the night it came out and eagerly awaited the release of the second and third parts. Despite its short length, creator Joss Whedon accomplishes in 45 minutes what directors of movie musicals fail to do in two hours: he develops characters that you root for and care about. For all of its witty one-liners, Dr. Horrible is just as heart-warming as it is hilarious.

For fans of: Neil Patrick Harris, Freeze Rays and Frozen Yogurt.

#9 – Reefer Madness

No, that title is not a typo. Reefer Madness is a cautionary satire, based on the 1938 propaganda film of the same name. It’s every bit as bizarre and outlandish as its name implies, which just makes me love it more. The movie boasts an infectiously fun score and some of the best casting I’ve ever seen in a movie musical, including Alan Cumming as the Narrator, B-movie star Christian Campbell as Jimmy, SNL star and former Wicked cast member Ana Gastayer as Mae and the utterly adorable Kristen Bell as Mary Sunshine.

For fans of: TV Show, “Weeds”, Mass Hysteria and “Special Brownies”

#8 – Grease

You know you’ve seen it a zillion times, you probably even own it on DVD but you still watch it every time it comes on TV (I do.) Grease is one of those classic movie musicals that defines an era. Danny and Sandy are cultural icons in the vein of Mickey and Minnie, Lucy and Desi, and Carrie and Mr. Big. Grease is the epitome of a good movie musical – it’s fun and frivolous and certainly worth watching if you happen to come across it on ABC Family (not that I have…cough…)

For fans of: the hand jive, pink hair, leather jackets, and good old-fashioned nostalgia

#7 – Rocky Horror Picture Show

Rocky Horror is perhaps one of the strangest movie musicals ever made, but I love it. Having seen the stage show and the insane amount of audience participation that occurs during it, I’m always tempted to yell at the tv whenever I watch it at home, which usually makes me feel like a crazy person. Insanity aside, without Rocky Horror the world would never know the joy of the Time Warp.

For fans of: gold lamé undies and sweet transvestites.

#6 – Dreamgirls

Dreamgirls is the story of a African American girl group trying and their rise to fame in the 1960s. It’s the perfect example of all of the essential elements of a film coming together – the sets, the casting, the directing, the costuming, among other things – to make the book and score (aka the music part of a musical) so much more vivacious. Dreamgirls was a breakthrough moment for star Jennifer Hudson and she won a much deserved Academy Award for the role. Her voice is smooth, warm and undeniably gorgeous and her performance is equal parts heartbreaking and inspiring.

For fans of: Motown, fierce belting and youtube covers of beyonce’s single ladies dance.

#5 – Chicago

I rarely see movies in theaters. It’s not that I don’t enjoy the smell of popcorn or joy of jujubes stuck to the bottom of my shoe, I do love going to movies, but for a broke student it’s just too expensive. I mean a show comes along once in a lifetime, for a few weeks, whereas I can wait for movies to come out on tv or come to cable. Chicago is one of the rare movies I ran out to see opening weekend, back in 2002. And it was so worth the $10 movie ticket. I’ve seen Chicago live, and I have to say, I think the movie is better than the live musical. Unlike the stage musical, which I sometimes thinks exacerbates the limitations of working on a stage, the movie turns Chicago into more of a character study than just a movie. The movie musical is nearly flawless and unveiled the amazing vocal talent of Catherine Zeta-Jones.

For fans of: Jazz, fishnet tights and the cell block tango.

#4 – Cabaret

I have two words for you: LIZA. MINNELLI. Cabaret is an amazing music itself, but Liza’s effortless performance elevates what could be a typical movie musical to a cinematic event. Cabaret, which tells the story, albeit subtly, of Hitler’s rise to power, is definitely not a happy-go-lucky musical. In fact it’s kind of a downer, but it’s thought provoking and truly touching and if I had my way it would be obligatory in every WWII era history class.

For Fans of: LIZA! (enough said.)

#3 – Gentlemen Prefer Blondes

Another career defining film, Gentlemen Prefer Blondes skyrocketed Marilyn Monroe’s career to superstardom. Many people don’t know that Gentlemen Prefer Blondes was a stage musical before it was a movie, and a book before that. Regardless of its origins, it’s definitely a must-see classic moment in film history. As a musical, it is perhaps less effective – it’s not really the standard book-musical, bit nonetheless, the music is catchy, the dialogue is witty and no one can deny that Marilyn was a true star.

For Fans: Diamonds, diamonds, diamonds.

#2 – Wizard of Oz

Another diva-heavy movie, the Wizard of Oz launched Judy Garland’s career (and somewhat by extension, Liza Minelli, her daughter’s). Like a slew of others on this list, Wizard of Oz is a true classic. My favorite memory of the Wizard of Oz comes from my brief stint at summer camp, when I was eight. I played a flying monkey in a production of the show. After our record breaking (for Camp Lohikan) two-day run, the entire cast and crew piled into the gym, and watched the Wizard of Oz three consecutive times. Now, I know I was eight, but I still think that’s a testament to its greatness – it’s just one of those movies you can watch repeatedly and it’s still as awe-inspiring and entertaining as it was the first time.

For fans of: yellow-brick road, flying monkeys, plaid.

#1 – West Side Story

My first exposure to West Side Story was just last year, when I saw the Broadway revival. Before that, I had listened to the music, but I held out on watching the movie. I figured that the experience of seeing it onstage with the original choreography would be worth the wait. Ultimately, I found the current revival a little lackluster. After seeing it, I went home and immediately watched the movie and I was riveted from start to finish. It’s an absolute gem and the performances by its leads, particularly the effervescent Natalie Wood as Maria, are incredible.

For fans of: America, the Jets, the Sharks, Peace.

What movie musicals make your top ten list?

As I’ve pointed out before, I love taboo. I love studying them and helping to break them down. This Halloween, I went home to Alabama to see some friends, and we went to see Rocky Horror Live at the historic Alabama Theatre. I used the experience to write a review, which I think is quite good and a lot of fun. I thought I’d share it, since it has something to do with the taboos I talk about so often.

Review follows the photo and jump

The Rocky Horror Masquerade Ball

They stand in line with arms full as they wait for the doors to open for the masquerade.  They hold rice, toast and newspaper among other odds and ends. They are dressed in their Halloween best – or worst – and most of them aren’t wearing very much at all.

They are the unknown minority, the freaks and weirdoes of an otherwise conservative Southern town. Two nights before All Hallow’s Eve, they gather around the doors of the historic Alabama Theatre for the annual Halloween Masquerade featuring a live performance to the film “The Rocky Horror Picture Show.”

The night’s hostess promised it would be a night celebrating “expression and debauchery and just being raunchy,” warning all those in attendance that they “better be f—ing ready for it!”

If you’ve never been to the Rocky Horror ball in Birmingham, it is hard to be prepared. Every year, those who wish to celebrate Alabama’s most counterculture lifestyles gather to watch and perform the horror cult classic about a couple of normal, uptight kids who stumble upon a castle full of freaks after a car wreck in the rain. Oh, the inhabitants also happen to be a group of aliens from the planet Transsexual in the galaxy Transylvania, whose leader has taken their weapon technology to create his ideal young, hot stud. Yes, it is as dirty as it sounds.

The film gained cult status after being shown at midnight every night in a small New York theatre in the 1970s. Among those die hard fans has emerged a subgroup, who enjoy dressing up to match the films out-of-this-world characters. This prompted the Alabama Theatre group to create a costume contest before the show, for both general admission (this years winner was Facebook, although Octomom really had a shot) and for those dressing as a character.

Eventually, weekly viewers began to act out the scenes in front of the camera – adding their own dose of shock value, and invented a kind of code to stick with the faithful fans worldwide. Certain phrases, when spoken on screen, elicit a response from the crowd. When Janet, the female “norm” says her name, the audience yells “slut!” When the films transsexual hero, Dr. Frank-n-furtur, proposes a toast over dinner, the crowd literally throws toast, and so on throughout the film.

If you haven’t seen the film, this isn’t the place to start. The film, and all of its hilarious little nuances, stands only in the background of the show. The real entertainment comes from the horrible actors on stage (certainly the only actors as bad as those onscreen) and the crowd itself.

And as the hostess suggested, it is not for the faint of heart. It begins with a sacrificing of the virgins (those who have never seen “Rocky Horror” live) which foretellingly ends in simulated sexual acts.

The props are horrible, the actors are constantly watching the screen to pick up their cues and the audio is out of sync, but none of that matters if the crowd is good. And man were they good. By the end of the night, everyone was covered in rice and toilet paper, as attendees brought props to spare. Everyone in attendance sang along, screamed along, and danced along throughout the night, the climax of which was the show’s most famous song, the “Time Warp.”

And while the performers themselves often seemed like a bunch of dirty-minded fourteen year olds, their lack of talent didn’t stop them from putting on a good show. They were most in their element when it came time to pop out one of many dildos or act out one of the movie’s more graphically violent moments, but they never forgot about their audience and community. The events of the film were made more topical, as references to Proposition 8 and local Birmingham corruption littered the performance.

As they file out of the showing, the freaks and weirdoes are talking to each other. They sing together, and dance together, sometimes with strangers, and sometimes with friends. But they never recognize the difference. They are one in their love of something a little bit dirty, a little bit wrong, and just oh-so-perfect for those unconcerned with society.

So halloween was pretty fun actually. I woke up early and went to breakfast with Shannon at Lulu’s bagel and espresso, which was delicious. Then shopped a little bit and went home to bake the world out of my kitchen. We made gingerbread raisin streusel muffins, which were AWESOME and I think I’ve eating about a bajillion over the course of the day, and weird pumpkin pie that turned out way better than i thought it would. I carved half my pumpkin and so far it has half of Max’s face on it. Max did my face last year and this is actually gunna be pretty creepy. Peter and I brought the muffins over to Gulliver’s for our first meeting with the fellow NaNo writers, which went pretty great. I’m gunna start writing today after I wake up. Woo…. nervous.

So, then we went up to the U for a bit and hung around at the concert. There was a really cute band that had a tuba, trumpet, concertina, ukulele, and a guy who played piano and assorted percussion things… along with melodica. That made me happy. Also, the main singer lady is in my choir. After that we went downtown to see the official midnight showing of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. They had people dressed up and acting it out along with the movie in front, and they sold us goodie bags with things to throw and do for certain parts and there was a LOT of shouting. It was a blast.

All throughout the night Peter’s truck had been breaking, but we somehow made it through. It would take ages to start and would not even try to start and then all of a sudden just work. Also, I left my FREAKING phone in Peter’s truck and now I’m kind of pissed off about it because I was supposed to get in touch with Des tomorrow through it. I’ll just talk to peter in the morning. Maybe I can drive out and grab it. I’m dying right now and need to sleep, though. Gnight!

10) Allstars – Things That Go Bump in the Night

This song is from British boy/girl group Allstars. They were like S Club 7, but not. “Things That Go Bump in the Night” is a bit like Thriller (especially the creepy voice at the beginning) and a bit like Ghostbusters, basically the whole thing is sort of a rip-off, but it’s still enjoyable. This song was also featured on the Scooby Doo Movie Soundtrack, which tells you something about the Scooby Doo Movie Soundtrack.
9) The Edgar Winter Group – Frankenstein

9 minutes of Prog Rock at it’s finest from the albino king of the experimental genre, Edgar Winter. Becauseo of the length, this song is actually really annoying if you don’t enjoy Prog Rock, but if you’re ready to listen to 9 minutes of an experimental instrumental, go for it.
8 ) Alice Cooper – Welcome to My Nightmare

Alice Cooper + Dracula Costume + Ghost Muppets x Dry Ice = Halloween
7) The Addams Family Theme Song

The Addams Family Theme Song is a Halloween classic.
6) France Gall – Frankenstein

Yes, it’s another song called “Frankenstein,” but I assure you it’s a completely different song. This song (written by Serge Gainsbourg) is awesome, even if you don’t understand what’s going on, but if you do understand French you know how witty and catchy the lyrics of M. Gainsbourg are, and this song is a great example of what Gainsbourg can do. Also, it’s about Frankenstein.
5) Ray Parker Jr. – Ghostbusters

This song is excellent, and the video is so ’80s I could gag myself with a spoon. Featuring cameos from Chevy Chase, Danny Devito, and Carly, clips from the film, and the Ghostbusters dancing with Ray Parker Jr.
Bonus video: Steps doing Ghostbusters:

Congratulations. You have now seen everything.
4) KC and the Sunshine Band – I’m Your Boogieman

I know there’s a Rob Zombie version, but this one is way more enjoyable, and just as Halloween-y.
3) Michael Jackson – Thriller

No Halloween song list would be complete without Thriller, so here it is. What can be said about Thriller that hasn’t already been said by someone more knowledgeable on the subject that I? I’m not sure, but hey look, it’s that jacket that everyone likes for some reason!
2) Richard O’Brien – The Time Warp

I couldn’t find the movie version (*sad face*) but this version from the original West End production is just as good.
1) Bobby “Boris” Picket – The Monster Mash

The Monster Mash is required for any Halloween celebrating ever. No arguments can be made against this. It may be cliché, but it’s awesome. Don’t rag on the Monster Mash.

Bonus Clip: Werewolf Bar Mitzvah

Want your “Rocky” fix and can’t make it to Asheville for their Halloween blowout? Join the “Low Down Cheap Little Punks” cast at the Rialto Theater in Raleigh this Friday for a midnight screening of the cult classic “The Rocky Horror Picture Show.” Bring yourself, a “virgin,” and every step to “The Time Warp” memorized.

http://www.lickitlips.com/

Rialto Theater: 1620 Glenwood Ave,  (919) 856-8683

Looking to trade collecting candy for throwing rice? Feel like shouting at a  theater screen instead of yelling “trick or treat?” In the mood to unleash your inner Sweet Transvestite?

Join the cast of Unexpected Pleasures at the Carolina Cinemas, 1640 Henderson Road in Asheville this Halloween for a midnight screening of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show.”  If you’ve never been to a showing or have been out of the loop, Halloween night is your night to go. Long considered to be a National Holiday of sorts to many a Rocky Horror devotee, here’s your chance to dress up as one of your favorite RHPS characters, interact with the performing cast as well as the movie on the screen.

So if you’re without a Halloween party or even a plan, spend your evening in Asheville for a midnight screening of The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=56860097280&v=wall&ref=ts

West Lawn Cemetery
Canton, Ohio

Clip from Frankenstein: Colin Clive’s “It’s Alive!” scene

Alice Cooper – Feed My Frankenstein

Eddie Thomas – Frankenstein Rock

Edgar Winter Group – Frankenstein

Susan Sarandon & Richard O’Brien – Over at the Frankenstein Place

Most people who know me know how much I love older British men. I thought I should just start a “list” here and give everyone some pictures… Granted these guys are old, but they’re so talented and *ahem* attractive The order changes each day, so here they are, in no particular order:

Alan Rickman:

Famous to most people as Professor Snape from the Harry Potter films

Loved him so much in “Sense and Sensibility”.

Anthony Hopkins:

He’s a KNIGHT. He’s AWESOME. Need I say more?

John Lennon:

One of my heroes. Kind of a difficult person, but had the right ideas.

(The Beatles:)

Best rock band EVER.

Colin Firth:

The best Mr. Darcy on screen from “Pride and Prejudice” in my opinion.

Hugh Grant:

Very funny guy, especially in movies like Bridget Jones.

Fantastic job in “Sense and Sensibility”!

Ralph Fiennes:

Amazing performances in “The English Patient” and “Schindler’s List”.

Terry Jones:

Famous from Monty Python. Great guy.

Neil Innes:

Musician who worked with the Monty Python guys.

And Now for my “Favorite” guys.

Hugh Laurie:

Famous for his role as Dr. House, I first knew him as “the dad from Stuart Little”. However, I highly recommend the British Comedy series “A Bit of Fry and Laurie” which he made with his comedy partner Stephen Fry. The dudes are HILARIOUS.

Tim Curry:

Yes, he’s the guy from “Rocky Horror Picture Show”. I love that movie! He was also the original King Arthur in the Broadway musical “Monty Python’s Spamalot” and did a fantastic job. Another movie I really enjoyed him in is “Clue” made in 1985. This guy can sing, there is no doubt about that!

Michael Palin:

First became really famous as a member of “Monty Python”. However he has also done a number of movies like “A Fish Called Wanda” (for which he earned a BAFTA) and “The Missionary” which show that he is a versatile actor. He has also done a number of travel shows for the BBC, and is known as an all-around nice guy. My favorite Python, and definitely one of my favorite people EVER.

Peter Sellers:

So I always enjoyed Peter in the Pink Panther films. Other than that, I didn’t know much about him. He was funny and cute in the first Pink Panther, and that’s probably when I got my fangirl crush. But I didn’t think much of him, because I didn’t know much about him. When I first got really into Monty Python I saw some interviews where they all said they were a fan of the Goon Shows on BBC Radio, and heard them mention Peter Sellers.

Then, a friend loaned me a book called “Being There” which I read in one sitting. (Fantastic book.) I liked it so much, I looked up the movie on YouTube. I was floored by Peter’s amazing performance in that film. I really feel he deserved the Academy Award for that movie. After the movie, and seeing how “cute” Peter Sellers was, I looked him up, and looked up the Goon Show. I’m now a hardcore Goons fan, and I’m sure I’ll post a blog about them one of these days.

Peter Sellers was no angel. He was from all accounts a difficult person to work with. However, his enormous talent  helps me to forgive him. He was married 4 times, if that tells you anything about his personality. It has been suggested he may have had Asperger’s Syndrome (a high functioning form of Autism). This could definitely be the case. If it is, it helps to explain a lot of his personality clashes with so many collegues. Sadly, he died 10 years before I was even born. :’( I still miss him.

Yes, I have a thing for British comedians. Is it obvious? I’ll be posting more separate blogs about Peter Sellers, Sense and Sensibility, Being There, and the Goons. I have posted plenty of blogs about Monty Python. Feel free to leave comments!

In Ottawa (where I live), there is a fantastic theatre called the Mayfair that shows The Rocky Horror Picture Show every Halloween.  This year will be my first year attending a proper Rocky Horror screening, complete with throwing shit at the screen, yelling profanities, dressing absurdly, and all that other fun stuff.

I went to see the play version once and it was totally lame-o.  There was absolutely nothing shocking or explicit about it, and really, isn’t that the point?  To top it off, the audience wasn’t allowed to throw anything.  Give me a break.

If you aren’t lucky enough to live in a city that offers Rocky Horror screenings, or perhaps you are too embarrassed to go out in public in drag (but you harbor a secret desire to do so), then a Rocky Horror soiree is perfect for you and your friends this Halloween.

For this party, you need to watch the movie and equip your guests with the proper props and a list of cues.  You can find all you need to know (and some things you don’t) at rockyhorror.com

I suggest you invite your friends to this party via email and attach the link so they have some time to look it over at their leisure, in their leisure suits.

A word of warning; this party is not to be attempted by anyone extremely lazy.  You will have an extraordinary amount of cleaning to do in the morning…bread crumbs all over the place, rice in your potted plants, possibly used condoms if the party goes REALLY well, so be prepared to do a shitload of cleaning.

The menu is inspired by both the sensuality of the film and the props used in a screening (i.e. toast, rice.)

Menu

Drinks

Vegan Orgasm

In a rocks glass filled with ice, combine;

• 1/2 oz white creme de cacao
• 1/2 oz amaretto
• 1/2 oz triple sec
• 1/2 oz vodka
• 1 oz vanilla soymilk

Appetizers

Crostini with Warm Vegan Cream Cheese and Red Pepper Jelly

• Cut a baguette into rounds, brush with a bit of olive oil, and toast under your oven’s broiler.  Set aside.
• Turn oven heat to 350.
• Empty a container of vegan cream cheese into a small round ramekin for baking that you have greased with vegan butter.
• Bake until it looks melty but not liquified.
• Invert onto a plate.
• Top with lots of Red Pepper Jelly (available with condiments at most grocery stores.)
• Serve warm with the toasted baguette rounds.

Side Salad with Tahini and Red Wine Vinegar Dressing

Tahini and Red Wine Vinegar Salad Dressing

• In a blender combine;
• 1/3 cup of tahini
• 1/4 cup of olive oil
• 1/4 cup of hot water
• 2 Tbs of lemon juice
• 2 Tbs of red wine vinegar
• 2 Tbs of vegan parmesan
• 1 Tbs of dill
• 2 Tbs of sugar
• 1 tsp of dried parsley
• 1 tsp of garlic flakes
• 2 Tbs of dijon
• salt and pepper to taste

Main Course

Roasted Tomato Risotto

For this recipe you need to have the deliciously simple to prepare Roasted Tomato Sauce on hand.  The recipe can be found on the Roald Dahl Day Post.

• In a pot, fry 1 diced red onion, 2 cloves of minced garlic, and 1 package of chopped veggie chicken strips in 1 Tbs of olive oil.
• Once everything starts to caramelize, add 2 cups of risotto (Arborio) rice and continue to fry for another few minutes to colour the rice a bit.
• Now 1 ladlefull at a time, start adding 6 to 7 cups of a lightly salty stock, allowing the water to fully absorb into the rice after each ladlefull before adding another one.  This process will take you 20 minutes.  Stir constantly!!!
• After about 15 minutes of ladling and stirring, add 1 ½ cups of Roasted Tomato Sauce (the recipe is in the Roald Dahl Day Post) and 1 bunch of chopped spinach.  Allow the rice to absorb the liquid and thicken, continuing to stir constantly.
• Only continue adding more ladlefulls of the stock after you’ve added the tomato sauce if the risotto seems too thick or the rice is not fully tender yet.

Dessert

Chocolate Fondue

Fondues are a very sensual experience that will go well with the film.  These days you can get tiny fondue sets for under twenty bucks, like the one depicted below from Target.

To make a fondue, melt squares of your favourite vegan chocolate or your favourite chocolate chips in your chocolate fondue maker.  Add a splash of Kirsch (optional.)  Skewer and dip any of the following;

• strawberries
• bananas (I like the mini ones for this, very suggestive.)
• vegan marshmallows (check out pangea for delicious ones to order.)
• vegan cookies
• melon balls
• apple slices
• pear slices
• orange slices

SUCCESS!!! Why didn’t anyone tell me? This news is over a month old!

I’ve just watched The Rocky Horror Picture Show for about the billionth time because it is my favouritist film ever.

If I need an excuse, which I don’t, Brad’s glasses are a bit like mine. That’s pretty cool I think:

Uncanny. I’m trying to lose weight so that my face looks less like a bum. I’ve given up chocolate this week, but hot chocolate and cereals with “chocolate” in don’t count.

I’m trying to source a region 2 DVD of Shock Treatment but I keep getting outbid on eBay. Maybe I’ll just watch it online, I’ve never seen it and I’m a student so I’m not prepared to spend more than £5 on a DVD unless I absolutely have to.

By the way, I’m watching RHPS again now. Coz it’s just so good.

Hey, buddy. Don’t dream it. Be it.

Do your thing, chicken wing. Haters to the left!

why not?

This is one of my most favourite films EVER! It’s got such an awesome cast and couldn’t be funnier if it tried.

This utter gem stars one of my favourite actors ever, Tim Curry. This man is so commanding, hilarious, scary, brilliant and any and all positive things an actor could be.

The influence for this post is because Chad from New Found Glory had put a pic up on Twitter as he ran into him when leaving his gym after an MMA class.

I so wish I could meet him, I bet he is such a nice guy and we all know he is funny as hell Chad is looking well old here, weird, innit?

Here are a few posters for Clue when it was released.

Two questions that are seemingly related: Why do vitamins make me nauseous? Why does my body constantly betray me? This leads me to believe I can trust nothing corporeal…

New project sooo very soon. Since I will most likely be up until two this morning maybe even tonight…er, tomorrow!

Now for something completely different.

So MTV was going to remake The Rocky Horror Picture Show, but then they realized that there was actually music in it and dropped the idea like a sequined bag full of bloody biker organs.

Actually they probably thought that, despite all the other shit they put out into the world, it would be completely tasteless to remake THE BEST MOVIE EVER. Still, I would totally watch (and (pretend to) hate) the remake and I’m a little disappointed. But it would never have been cast correctly. So I’ve done the casting for it. En-fucking-joy.

Stephen Fry as The Criminologist
He’s British. You already trust his voice and you don’t even know it yet. You don’t have to. You can just trust me, baby. That’s right. Shh.

Morgan Freeman as Dr. Everett Scott
This would just be funny.

Kristin Chenoweth as Columbia
She’s got the voice and she’s adorable, albeit a little old. But no one will know because most people aren’t familiar with her. Go ahead, Google, I’ll wait…Cute, right?

Billy Joe(l) Armstrong as Eddie
He’s not chubby, but he’s got the dead-looking thing down. And he’s a “rockstar.” Done.

Jake Gyllenhaal as Rocky Horror
Yeah, you’d think I’d choose Ryan Reynolds, but as a casting director I am more responsible than that. Ryan’s a friggin god, but he’s too “grown” looking. Rocky requires a really innocent face, hence Bubble Boy. Plus it’d be awesome to blond him out.

Zooey Deschanel as Janet
Duh, like you didn’t see that coming. I originally thought Brittany Murphy for Janet, but she’s just too busy with a project working titled “Cocaine and Collagen” which is unfortunate because she can sing. Zooey’s got a brilliant voice though and she’s super cute and I’d like to see her get all…crazy.

Ewan McGregor as Brad
His American accent is good, he can sing, he’s gorgeous, and put some glasses on him and instant asshole.

Hugh Laurie as Dr. Frank N Furter
Can’t you see it? I sure can.

I haven’t cast Magenta or Riff Raff. I was considering Julia Roberts and Willem Defoe. What do you think?

If you haven’t seen Rocky Horror, please, just come over and we’ll watch it.  For real.  I wouldn’t deny you.

Ugh, that’s not what I meant.

Oh, and last post was my 50^th with 100 comments. My WordPress dashboard is very even number looking. Let’s fuck it up.

Under Party! Under what, you ask? Under the counter? Under construction? Underwear? This post contains a lot of men not wearing underwear. Read on.

The night starts tamely. I emerge from my apartment of relative calmness (sadly I’m not super enough to have a fortress of solitude) and walk down Avenida Corrientes to the Centro Cultural Ricardo Rojas. I sit through two hours of a poised, intense young professor explaining the foolishness of Russia for adopting Marxism when it should have been industrializing. Afterwards, I go downstairs to see a movie that I got a ticket for earlier. Well, I’m under the impression that it’s a movie, due to my spotty understanding of Spanish and sloppy color-coding on the part of the Centro. It is not a movie.

The lobby of the Centro is packed! More than I have seen. The line for this thing is thick and long, animated with lively conversations (for your imagination’s benefit I’ll tell you, Porteño Spanish sounds like Italian, and when Argentines get excited they tend to wave their hands around as if they were swatting flies). The people in front of me are a young gay couple who are keen to demonstrate that the concept of a Public Display of Affection does not carry the same connotations here as in the US. Not that I didn’t know that already, when half the people on the street are holding hands and looking dreamily at the sky and don’t give a damn that this is a busy sidewalk and some of us have places to go.

Hey, I am NOT a sourpuss, don’t give me that look..

The name of the event is Fiesta Loca! Fiesta Negra! Fiesta Under! Oblivious, I stand in line and, when the doors open, shuffle in. The first thing I see is a 10 foot long cock. The back wall of the room has graphic gay porn projected on it. The whole audience is a little in shock, believing that it’s some sort of joke but not really sure how to take it — are these people poking fun at us or at themselves? The scene, which is quite long and involves two couples, a swimming pool, and a wide variety of sex acts, continues playing throughout the night. It gets a couple more laughs every few minutes, just out of amazement that the nightmare of the Catholic ethos is being shown in full glory — nay, supersized glory — to a full audience sitting in a government-funded theater.

Before I sit down, the actors are on stage, confidently decked out in nylon and leather and denim and boots. Most of them, at least…a row of old ladies sits respectably along the back wall, smiling on the imminent debauchery like a group of benevolent aunts.

The first monologue starts. A young lady in what could be a Catgirl costume bounces to the front of the stage on an inflatable tube, and while the rest of the cast watches, she goes on at length about… well, something. I can’t follow too much of it. But it’s funny! Everyone else is laughing, at least. She sings a cute song with lewd lyrics and disappears.

There is no explanation of what this event is. Is it a concert, a musical, or an immobile gay pride parade? It’s not clear.

Next up, a man in loose clothing is overjoyed to wish the Centro a happy birthday — September was its 25th anniversary month — and is so happy that he’s going to lip-synch a J-Lo song. While he does it, his clothes start to come off. Soon he’s down to just his briefs, and although everyone’s convinced that’s as far as it’ll go, nope, they come off too and now his uncircumsized manhood is getting some air. He jumps off the stage and approaches the crowd, and puts his leg up on the armrest of a college-age man in the front row, who is stiff with horror. He starts to brace himself on the seat, and all at once, everyone realizes what he’s going to do — he climbs on top of the front row and starts crawling his way back. Oh God! He’s coming this way! What do we do?! The audience is riotous, panicked, hyperventilating with awkward gasp-laughs. He cuts short his adventure just as he’s right on top of me, gifting me with several extra seconds of junk-in-the-face, because on stage, the next actor is starting their monologue. He scurries off to the side, much to the chagrin of everyone in my row who thought they were going to be spared having to…you know, deal with it. Well.  I guess I am learning things all the time in Argentina. I’ve never had a naked man crawl on top of me like that before. In public, that is.

After this 21st century Latin Rocky Horror episode, my memory gets a little hazy. One of the highlights that I remember vaguely was when the old ladies had their turn to talk excitedly about their sex life and how much they love “el Rojas,” the Centro. The low point of the show was when the few young women in the cast asked the audience who’d like to see them naked. The response was tepid, the catcalls sounded like they came more out of duty than enthusiasm, and the girls thankfully did not undress and exacerbate the awkwardness.

It was a good night. I don’t think I really need to add commentary to this, but let me just say how glad I was to see some representation of LGBT culture here. It really put that lap dog Rocky Horror Picture Show in its place. But if Porteños haven’t gotten wind of it yet, let’s try and keep Hedwig to ourselves for another couple of years. I’m just afraid they’re going to put us to shame there too.

Went to see The Stripper, by Richard O’Brien, he of the Rocky Horror Show. It looks good based on a pulp fiction book by Carter Brown. A washed up detective investigates a suicide that isn’t. Cue a tale of lonely hearts, strippers, and a florist who looks more than a little like a 1970’s Elton John.

The lead playing the detective is good, sings, and dances well. He has that great look and feel of a 1950’s jaded US detective. The stage is a marvel, too. Constantly shifting and rotating between the scenes. Sadly, that the good bits over. The actress playing the stripper Delores, is a ex-model, with the androgynous figure that that implies. A far cry form the burlesque image I expected. The songs could have been better, some were frankly naff; the story was good, and yet just needed those extra touches to make it brilliant.

In Rocky Horror to which it is inevitably compared the hilarious and outrageous plot is punctuated with the odd moment that is a ‘filler’. Here is the other way round: odd moments of brilliance and lots of stuff that was ok, but not great .

This is a real shame, this could have been so good. It desperately cries out for a co-writer to take the great ideas and make them really work. I suppose this is my real problem with it. It was good, but could so easily have been great. I am left therefore somehow disappointed.

Anyway, some nice images from the show are here.

The choir retreat today was really really fun. It was pretty much three hours of bonding time with about twenty minutes of singing and fifteen minutes of talking about concerts and housekeeping details. I am meeting some really awesome girls with lots of personalities. I think choir will be good this year. We played get to know you games which brought out jokes, giggles, and I learned things about people that I probably wouldn’t have otherwise. It was at a church in Tacoma about five minutes from the school. We carpooled there and back. Dr. Lyman seems like a nice professor and fun to be around also which is good when talking about the person who is supposed to supervise you.  Now I am just waiting until 11:20 when a bunch of us walk over to the Blue Mouse theater in Proctor district to see Rocky Horror Picture Show. I’ve never seen it, but people tell me I have to go, so I’ll go see what it’s all about. It starts at midnight so I probably won’t be back until 2:30-3:00 in the morning. Yikes!

Back in July, I attended the 25th reunion for the class of ‘84 at UNB.  Part of the allure was that is was also a get together for many of the cast and crew of the ‘81, ‘82, ‘83, ‘84, and ‘85  Red ‘n’ Black Revues.  We all had a tonne of fun, including re-enacting perhaps the biggest and best production number that UNB’s annual variety show has ever seen:  the Time Warp/Sweet Transvestite numbers from Rocky Horror Picture Show.

I have woefully few pix from the event, but my pal Eric Langshur has posted a good mix here.  That’s me sporting the skull cap in the role of Riff-Raff.  Unfortunately, the skull cap looks more like a condom.

OK Ladies. Mid-October we will be visiting the University Mall Theatre for a midnight screening of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Cast your vote in the comments section on whether you prefer we attend Oct 17 (During the Trashy Lingerie Night) or Oct 10 (Without a special theme). One will obviously have a more unusual crowd, but seeing as I do not want to be the only member of our party in costume I want to put it to a vote.

I think it’s come time again for me to start complaining about the sun again. Don’t moan! You love it when I complain about that stupid ball of stupid fire or whatever it’s made out of. Why must it be back again, making me all warm and cranky in the car in the mornings? I hate getting to school and being all angry about everything straight away cause.. haha.. yeah.

Ya gotsta love the way I can get out of doing work. Hayley and I had to present our thingo in Psychology today and she was just calling out random groups and it was the scariest thing in the world. So, what I did was make sure to distract the groups before they went to present so it’d take longer for them to start and I’d ask as many questions as I could afterwards and yeah. Me and Hayley plan on doing the work at lunch tomorrow though, syeah.

It was amusing at recess. I was bitching quite loudly to Nic about Mr Milner and he walked past and haha, yeah.. gawd. I like, died cause I thought he’d cut my head off, but he just kept walking.

I think he heard what I said and took it on board cause he was back to his nice self in Sociology. Me and Sejla planned not to speak at all in class out of protest but then he got Kathie to teach us how to make paper planes and then he got me to teach the class how to do The Time Warp, so like, yeah.. hahaha. He did go on about how we don’t respect him or some shit but like, whatever.

I went and looked at the art gallery thing that’s in the library at the moment at lunch cause I wanted to see stuff that Fahreta made and yeah. A lot of the stuff that’s there is pretty good actually. You wouldn’t think anything nice would come from our gross school. Oh, and, it’s really super loud in the library. I thought libraries were supposed to be all.. not loud.

My future mother in law (hahaha) told me that I fail at counting, but that I also pulled off a corset.. syeah.. that was nice

In Media.. well.. I actually didn’t go to Media. Well, I did, but a short while into it I got a text and I “went to look for locations to film our movie.” Hahaha.. shhh. It turns out, during classes, the library isn’t so loud and is rather.. empty I suppose

I think I was there for like.. a little over a period. Then Kathie texted me and told me to get back to class really quick cause Milner was looking for me. Bastard. I was having a nice time. A really nice time.

The point is, my amazing improv skills came to good use cause I went back to class and I was like, “Gee! All these people kept showing me pictures from the other night and I was just trying to find a good location!” and then Kathie chimed in and helped me lie a bit before running off with me to get the goss.. hahahahaha

My group hardly got any filming done so like, I don’t know how we’re going to meet the movie deadline. Not that I was really focused on that today

Of course it decided to rain straight after class, so the bus was full of not only annoying people but wet, disgusting annoying people. I really, really hate rainy days where I have to get on public transport. Also, I was like, falling asleep as well.. twas awful.

I really need a good sleep in soon cause I’ve just been taking naps every afternoon and it’s not good and I hate it. Sooo yeah.

I was going to wait until I got like, photos from the school camera but I thought I’d post a couple of photos that have appeared on Facebook from the other night

These first ones are from Dracula. I like the second one as it amuses me

This one is not that great.. but.. I like who I’m standing next to.. hahaha

And of course, the ones from Rocky Horror. My face looks retarded in like, all of them cause like, it was constant singing.. but.. yeah..

And yeeeeah

I really, really want the video to it and the photos they took with the good cameras.

So, today was.. hahaha.. different. In a good way, of course. I would never have thought I’d do anything.. like that.. at.. school.. and.. yeah. Haha, shut up.

Today I learned that I can’t tell the difference between one dimensional and two dimensional.

I also learned how to make a really good paper plane! Thanks, Kathie!

As you were

I was running vaaaiirrr late this morning. Like, twenty whole minutes! It doesn’t sound like much but seriously, with the traffic on the way to school, it means a whole lot. I don’t know why I even cared though cause when I got to school all I did was complain about the stupid sun.

Spring has sprung and I don’t like it.

I had an oral due for English today that I didn’t even pick a topic for. I firstly just went and took Fahreta’s notes off her in the morning but then I couldn’t be bothered studying them, so I decided to put my powers of improv to good use. When it was my turn to present my oral, I just went up there and pretty much just repeated what everybody else had said, except I of course did it better. I believe I put on my Josh Thomas voice and presented it more as a stand up act than an informative, persuasive speech.

The point is, apparently my oral was one of the best. Apparently, it could have had a little bit more info but the presentation made up for all of that. So, I think that’s a big YAY for me.

I.. accidentally spent the whole of recess with Nic. Like, I really didn’t mean to.. haha, although, I don’t really mind. It was really amusing cause we were just sitting there and his friends had gone off on this walk (“good timing”) and they came back like, three times, but then they’d just go on another walk

Literature was a seriously fun class. It was really relaxed and we didn’t actually do anything at all. The teacher asked me to go and get some stuff she printed off and I went and got it and like, for some reason, it had printed like, SUPER TINY! Like, you needed a magnifying glass to see it. It was the funniest. So, I just went back and photocopied the sheet instead.

I like walking around the school now cause I keep getting stopped with people wanting to congratulate me on my amazing performance and stuff.

Speaking of which, I think they’re putting it on DVD soon

Oh, but, it’s super weird when you have “tough guys” singing about being sweet transvestites as you walk past.

Anyway, my Literature teacher was saying how she remembers the original Australian production of Rocky Horror and stuff and how the role of Frank was like, totally suited to me and she said that she wishes the entire show was Rocky Horror so that there could have been more. She thinks I’m destined for the theatre

Lunch time was fun. Nic went to McDonald’s and brought back a sundae for me and him to shaaaaare and yeah. I was amazed that it didn’t melt. It seems that like, two cups full of ice can stop ice cream from melting. I didn’t think that’d work at all. Thankfully it did though.. cause yeah..

I think I fell into some coma during Legal today. It was so boring. Haha, I mean, it was fun, but whenever the teacher spoke I just wanted to die. Legal is no longer about work; it’s about gossip and fun!

It was amusing cause she was asking to see our work books to see if we’ve done the work. I’ve had one blank page left in my book for the last term. I’ve written absolutely nothing at all.

I thought I’d be my usual nice person and sit with Nic on the bus today. I’m so nice. Nice, nice, nice, nice, nice.

hahaha

Shut up.

The point is, King Dedede is seriously the most useless character on Super Smash Bros. as he is just a fat loser that can’t move properly for shit. He drains my life. Yet, I have made it my mission this afternoon to try and make him an okay-ish character to use.

My life is just so interesting.

Dog in Northern Territory given parking ticket

I should probably consider naming this section, “The police and their dumbness” the way this is going.

Seriously, first they can’t find anything better to do than to wake some kids up for school and now they go around and give an animal a parking ticket. I’m sorry, but since when is a dog the same as a vehicle? Do you want me to hop on a dog and make it “drive” me to school? And, how on Earth do they expect to follow this up? I believe you need a license plate to issue a parking ticket so you can send it out to the person.

Speaking of which, it’s a little old lady who is probably the cutest thing in the world. As if you do that; stupid police. Like, seriously, talk about out of officer jurisdiction.

I plan on going into Legal on Friday to ask about this, cause seriously, what the eff, dude?

This probably ties in with that “supernanny state” that people were going on about today. On the topic of that, I swear, if I have to pay extra money just cause I want to eat KFC instead of a carrot, I’m gonna be so pissed.

I really had a good day today. It’s so strange how all of a sudden I’m not really minding Wednesday’s/Friday’s and instead I’m not looking forward to Tuesday’s/Thursday’s – just cause Milner is a total dickhead these days. I forgot to mention that I said hi to him three times today and he just gave me a dirty look all three times. What a loser.

Today I learned that you can actually ask for cups of ice at McDonald’s.

I also learned that you can get away with not doing work as long as you just pay a bit of attention during the lesson and add a bit of humour into what you’re saying.

As you were.