sex-in-the-kitchen « WordPress.com Tag Feed

Ambrosia's Jen Bluekissed Chats about The Kitchen Table

jesseblair — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 16:26:13 +0000

Jen Bluekissed is one of the many talented writers in Ravenous Romance’s upcoming anthology, “Ambrosia,” which will be out around Valentine’s Day. Her story is the only one in the book in which the lead character is thick in the middle of being a parent—as well as maintaining a healthy new relationship with another adult. Jen and I chatted about that.

Q: I love the main female lead in your story. To me, she is very real in trying to navigate time for herself and balance motherhood. Do you have any thoughts about that?

A: I agree that there’s a challenge in balancing the two. Personally, I don’t have any children, but I can identify with women who work and raise kids. My mom must have been a saint. She had four boys in five years. Seventeen years later I was born. I like to tell people that I was an oops baby. My parents have been married for fifty years and most of those have been with at least one kid at home. When I was writing this story, I kept thinking about how so much erotic romance is devoid of children. For lots of reasons, I think there’s a challenge of keeping that aspect of female characters’ lives real while writing erotic fiction that’s tasteful.

Q: So, you knew this question was coming–just what kind of experience do you have with erm, ah…Kitchen Tables?

A: Up until very recently, my kitchen table was much too small to do anything fun on top of it. My husband and I had a round, two person table with straight backed chairs. It’s main purpose was to collect piles of magazines because there was never enough room to eat a meal. Plus, the chairs were so uncomfortable that neither of us could stand sitting in them. The whole set was something my husband had prior to our marriage, so it sat unused for the five years I’ve known him. After we moved to the Nashville area, one of the requests we made of the previous owner was that he leave his table and chairs after he left the property. He complied. Now using it in that way is on my list of things to do!

Q: I really like the painting scene. Have you ever been painted like that?

A: No, I haven’t. Whenever I’m naked, I get really cold and begin demanding blankets. If I didn’t know the act was coming and I were actually tied to the table, I’d totally go for it though!

Q: Why do you write erotica?

A: It began more as an experiment than anything else. I began writing fiction a little over a year and a half ago just for fun. When I found how much more active my own sex life was after picturing erotic scenes for hours on end in front of my computer, I knew I was hooked. I’ve got a couple novels that I’ve written since then that are still in revision. The only part about writing erotica that I don’t like is that when I try to revise, I start needing my husband. It’s hard to fix mistakes and make the prose better when I have to plan my rewrites for when my husband is home or will be home soon! Short stories are easier to fix.

Q: Why do you use a pen name?

My pen name sounds a heck of a lot like my legal name. I like that I can use blue lips as a logo. Hopefully, people will remember the blue lips more easily than they would remember my real name. The other reason I use the pen name is that I do still have a valid teaching license. If the economy ever gets bad enough, I might try going back into teaching.

Q: Who are your favorite writers?

A: This list changes frequently. In general, I really like John Irving, Stephen King, and Ken Follett. My favorite erotica writer is Gwen Masters.

Q: If you could be a food, what would you be?
.

A: In general, I think I would be a package of M&Ms. I would rather melt in my mouth than in my hand. If I were a food in an erotic romance, I would be a blue raspberry popsicle. I would write a character who sucks on me, turning her lips blue.

Q: What is your favorite food?

A: My mother’s turkey and dressing sandwiches.

Q: And, do you have any projects coming up?

A: Other than my novel length stuff that’s sitting on the shelf collecting dust while I mull over revisions, I have upcoming stories in Experimental: An Anthology of Sex and Science, edited by Jamaica Layne. My short story “Sex Study” will appear there. I’ve also received acceptance into Sweaty Sex. The story that will appear there is a sexy baseball story. I’m a long time St. Louis Cardinal Fan, so I had a lot of fun incorporating romance, sex, and baseball. Both those anthologies will be published by Ravenous Romance.

The What's What, Volume 22

metacognitionist — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 20:56:52 +0000

My sister gets high every day and she keeps eating all the food in the house. -FinalConsideration

Start making a stash in your room. Thats what I did when I heard my sisters were bringing over their mooch friends.

What’s the worst food to burp back up? For me, it’s hot dogs. -GhostofEllisBurks

I would say Orange Juice. That shit hurts.

Does it make me a BITCH for playing Madden on ROOKIE level? -Papayawarrior

No, you are only a bitch if you go 19-0 beating the computer by 50 every game. If you are competing on Rookie, you are just bad at the game. Which is better than being a bitch, in my opinion.

Let’s face it, our world will never be progressive until our parents die. Their generation is still filled with stupid backwards ideas. -Klassyk

90% true, they’ll be alive long enough to feel powerless as they watch their antiquated ideals crumble into society right before their death. Unfortunately, they won’t last to realize they are wrong and wasted years of resources and effort on petty bullshit.

Decided on who you are voting for? -jbauer4545

I always vote third party, because I’ve never lived in a swing state. I’m a registered Republican, just so I can vote in the primaries. Theres never small government for people candidates anymore, though. It’s all small government for business.

I can’t believe people are reading The Watchmen now, 20 years too late. -Megsboyee

How else will they be able to complain about the movie? Being sheeple takes work.

We agree that House is the best TV character correct? -Stankz

Oh, hes right up there. I’d throw him into the mix with both Tracy Morgan and Alec Baldwin from 30 Rock. My female lead goes to the redhead leader of the steno pool from MadMen. Shes got everyone on lock-down.

Have you ever bent someone over a kitchen counter? That’s what they’re for. -Target0007

No, kitchen counters are way to tall. You can’t bend any girl over them unless your humping Bigfoot. Any seasoned gentleman knows the back of a dining chair or the kitchen table is the best place to really lay down some kitchen punishment.

How much is an ounce of pot in your area? -rillumrt

Same as in your area, 1/16th of a pound. Lettuce head.

It’s funny throughout this 8 years I’ve found that there have been many criticisms of President Bush, but the main criticisms of Bush have painted two vastly different pictures of our president…either he’s a complete idiot that’s 2 IQ points above an ice cream cone….or, an evil mastermind capable of turning a legitimate war on terror into a revenge mission against Saddam and Iraq. So, WMC, which is it?

My opinion of him has changed many times since he took office. Now, I think hes just an average guy, who was excited to learn that he could become president, was elected, found himself in over his head and relied on bad advice from people he trusted, and helped get him into office. I don’t think he’s as dumb as everyone else thinks. I just think hes trusting people who have their own agendas at heart, and is too deep to either recognize this or too embarrassed to do anything about it.

I’ve never been to red robin and my familys going there I know its like the starbucks one but seriously what should I get?

The first time I went to Red Robin, I got the Banzai burger. I’ve been there dozens of times since, and never looked at the menu. The Banzai Burger is that good.

Favorite alcoholic beverage? -21cccp

Double shot of Jamesons, and a Ginger Ale. Though, I barely drink anymore, I can put three of these down before I feel a hint of unlightenment.

At what age do you think a guy should get the **** out of their parents house? -kerby414

The fact that you don’t want to leave makes you a loser, the complacency. If you are broke and just waiting for a check to move out, or whatever, you’re good. Doesn’t matter what number is on your license.

9 wackiest places to have Kama or sex

kamasutra2 — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 16:11:06 +0000

Hey folks, the following are real life (and not fantasy) Kama or sex positions:

1. Kama or sex on the boss’s table (when he is not in, ofcourse)

2. Kama or sex in the loo of a club or train station or office or school – using the toilet seat or the basin as the prop

3. Kama or sex on a moving motor bike! With you riding it and she holding your member from behind

4. Kama or sex in the lift – try pushing the stop button unless you want to be on everyone’e mobile phone…damn the manned lifts

5. Kama or sex in the kitchen. Surprise ‘in the mood’ thing

6. Kama or sex on the backseat of a near empty bus

7. Kama or sex on your girl friend’s drawing room/living room carpet with the looming fear of her folks returning and the door open.

8. Kama or sex in central park after midnight

9. Kama or sex in the backseat of a chauffeur driven car (remember ‘No way out’?…but this is real life we are talking about)

FREE SEX VIDEOS

dddsdsfdfdf — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 14:08:10 +0000

FREE SEX VIDEOS

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R. Kelly's "Sex in the Kitchen"

Emily Farris — Mon, 05 May 2008 21:42:30 +0000

Please, please watch until the end. Unless, of course, you’re easily offended, then you should

Boring

malpoet — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 09:34:40 +0000

Portia knows that life is a pain.

Just having been out shopping again.

It is a nasty continuous round, of

Doing boring things in the kitchen.

Peter comes home from his tedious job.

He cannot help thinking that Portia’s a slob.

She’s scruffy and tired and, all of the time,

Doing boring things in the kitchen.

Portia peels spuds during GMTV,

While the window cleaner sees what he can see.

He taps on the window dstracting her from,

Doing boring things in the kitchen.

Patrick comes in and he tickles her fancy.

She loves his cuddles and feels all romancy.

Now Portia and Patrick, engrossed in each other, are

Doing boring things in the kitchen.