Something else I completed recently was some more artwork for Glasgow-based band Call Me Ishmael; a cover for their new demo/ EP.

I worked up about three different versions, more or less along the same lines, and this is one of the rejects. Thought I’d share it.

These intricate and delicate  structures are vertebrae from a fish. They seem both complex and beautiful. They are an example of the interesting and amazing things you can find washed up on strandlines if you only take a closer look. These backbones were still articulated and joined to the head (illustrated in the picture below). I am not certain, yet, what type of fish this is but I am going to find out when I can access the right literature; both the bones and the scales can provide clues for identification.

It would have been very easy to overlook these fishy remains on the beach. An entire mono-filament nylon fishing net, complete with the catch of fish, was washed ashore and mostly buried in the sand. Only a small portion of the net was visible above the surface. On close inspection, dead fish heads and bones were entangled in the mesh and protruding from the sand – as you can see in the photographs below. Some of the skin and scales remained but the meat had been removed. In the sand around the nets and bones are small holes where small seashore creatures, like the sandhopper amphipods, have burrowed into the sediments and feasted on the fish.

© Jessica Winder and Jessica’s Nature Blog, 2009. Unauthorised use and/or duplication of this material, including both text and photographs, without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Jessica Winder and Jessica’s Nature Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 Photographs in this blog are copyright property of Jessica Winder with all rights reserved

There is no better place to explore the beauty of the Bahamas than Exuma Cays Land and Sea Park, which stretches for 22 miles from Wax Cay Cut in the north to Conch Cut in the south and out four nautical miles on either side of the cays. We cruise the Bahamas for several months each summer–and each year of the past 10 the improvements to Exuma Park above and below the tide line have exceeded our expectations.
Like many cruisers enroute to the Exuma Cays, we docked at Highbourne Cay on the journey south from Nassau where we obtained copies of Exuma Park’s dinghy and snorkel guides for Shroud and Hawksbill Cays. These waterproof guides also indicate the location of the new mooring fields off these two uninhabited cays.
Shroud Cay’s winding tidal creeks called out to our adventurous crew. We tied up to a mooring and launched our dinghy to follow the north creek as it meanders through a mangrove estuary, eventually emptying out into deep Exuma Sound. The sandbar at the creek’s end slices through gin clear, turquoise water and we think the beach is one of the prettiest in the Exumas.
Picking up a mooring at Hawksbill Cay offers visitors a wide array of scenic sand bars and enchanting beaches which can be reached by a new, well-maintained trail that cuts across this uninhabited cay to Exuma Sound. There are also the ruins of the Loyalist-period Russell Plantation to explore.
Warderick Wells, home of the park headquarters and visitor center, is our favorite destination. The park was established in 1958 to preserve the flora and fauna on these fragile islands. For the past 50 years, the park has served as a sanctuary for marine, bird and animal life throughout the central Bahamas.

from: Southern Boating    Text & Photos By Molly Potter Thayer

*Jakarta Globe, 6 February 2009

A man climbs quietly from a grave and closes a white burial cloth that shrouds a skeleton. The bones are the color of burned earth and in pieces. A maggot scuttles to hide behind the empty eye socket of the skull. After more than 30 years of interment, all that is left of a once middle-aged adult now fits into a small bundle.

A weathered, wooden plaque with jagged edges bears the name the skeleton once answered to.

At Menteng Pulo Public Cemetery in South Jakarta, the air is fresh with the scent of blossoming trees and rich earth. A lone mottled mutt threads cautiously among the graves, its skin matted and reddish from the rain and earth. She sits on top of a grave, observing as 50 gravediggers calmly go about their work. They are not burying the dead but raising them, literally, from their graves.

Along a large strip of land near the Cideng River, 10,600 square meters to be exact, emptied graves with ragged edges line the cemetery. The workers have been commissioned by the city administration to unearth about 3,500 plots to make way for a highway linking Jalan Soepomo and Jalan Rasuna Said.

“Traditionally, you cannot disturb the dead,” sayd Entong, the head gravedigger. “But this is a city that is developing, and they need to expand the road.”

Inside an open grave, Entong breaks up the damp soil with a rusty hoe. His black jeans and feet are encrusted with red earth. He hands the last of the unearthed bones to his assistant to wrap in cloth and take to another burial plot that has been allocated for the exhumed bodies.

“This one was buried in 1962, so there are very few bones left,” Entong says, pointing to the decomposed bundle of bones about the size of an infant.

Entong climbs out of the grave and begins to break the gray headstone with his hoe. Pieces of stone fly around him. He has to remove the name plaque embedded in the stone so it can be placed with the remains for identification. His skin is burnished from the 32 years he has worked outdoors as a gravedigger.

“People call me first when they want to bury someone,” Entong says.

On this overcast morning, no weeping or hushed prayers for the displaced dead are heard, only the thud of hoes hitting the soil. Entong says it has been two months since the excavation of the graves commenced and it is scheduled to end next week.

“At the beginning there were more relatives,” Entong says. “Now it is rare for families to come even though we have informed them we will be digging up the graves. Maybe they have moved. Maybe they can’t bear the process.”

The majority of the graves are Muslim but Entong estimates 800 Buddhist graves will also be uncovered this week.

The remains are being moved to new burial plots further down the road. Unclaimed remains are moved to a cemetery at Kampung Kandang in Cilandak or to Srengseng Sawah Cemetery in South Jakarta, Entong says.

The ground is soft as paste from the ongoing Jakarta showers and he flings it around him as he hoes. An errant and persistent fly flits around his bare feet.

“We take the remains out, wrap them up and then knock down the gravestone,” explains Suroh, a caretaker at Menteng Pulo since the ’70s. Wearing a red shirt, a large mole jutting from his chin, he watches Entong work in the distance.

“I do not cry at anyone’s funeral,” Suroh says. “I am used to them.

“We are here to fix their homes, their final resting place.”

It is noon when Entong rests inside a makeshift wooden hut in the middle of the cemetery. The soiled clothes of the caretakers hang to dry nearby on headstones and from overhanging trees.
A caretaker chugs on a motorcycle down the narrow dirt road that runs through the cemetery, ferrying four white bundles to an ambulance for relocation.

“It is funny. Kaplok, kaplok, kaplok is the sound of the bodies flapping,” says Suroh as he watches.
“We are all the same. In the end we will die,” he adds as he deeply inhales from a clove cigarette.
Under the cool shade of the hut, the men sit in their mud-caked clothes, sipping hot, milky coffee and talk lightheartedly about death. Entong recounts a time when he had to break the legs of a corpse.

“If I didn’t, they wouldn’t fit into the cloth,” he says.

The kain kapan, or burial cloths, are rough pieces of white cloth two meters in length. “These ones cost Rp 12,000 [about $1],” Entong says, pointing to a pile of fabric in a cupboard. “Cheap ones.”

The hush is disturbed by the arrival of Iwan Suwandi and his family. Together with his wife, Suwarti, his sister, sister-in-law and grandson, he has come to rebury his son Rachmad.

“I was shocked to get the notice from the cemetery,” Suwandi says, of being notified of the disinterment. “I found out at Lebaran,” he adds.

A gentle-looking man with glasses and specks of grey through his hair, Suwandi had been ill for the past three months and unable to come to Menteng Pulo earlier.

Wearing a tan fishing hat and checkered shirt, Ali greets Suwandi, whom he knows. The caretaker has been tending Rachmad’s grave since he was buried here four years ago. An old hand, Ali has worked at cemeteries since 1948 and takes care of 100 plots in Menteng Pulo.

Rachmad, Suwandi’s third son, died of liver problems at the age of 24. “I wanted to move him to Bogor but we have no family there,” says Suwandi, who instead asked for his son’s body to be moved nearby within the Menteng Pulo cemetery.

Entong is called upon to dig up the body.

“It is his job to dig. We each have a duty,” explains Suroh, whose own position is caring for the graves, like Ali.

Entong alternates using his hands and the hoe to scoop out the earth. The burial cloth is laid on the ground beside the grave and he begins to place the unearthed chunks of bone on it. Two assistants crouch nearby to lay them out on the burial cloth. Standing above his son’s grave, Suwandi’s face is placid as he calmly inquires about the whereabouts of his son’s skull.

The wooden headstone reads, Rachmad H. bin Iwan Suwandi, etched black upon painted white wood. Slivers of the skeleton’s rib cage are taken out one by one. Entong continues to dig and finds a hipbone. Finally, he finds the skull. Suwandi places his hand over his mouth and lets out a small gasp. The family begins to pray. A sniff escapes Suwandi as he continues to look at Entong in the grave.

“His legs aren’t here yet,” Suwandi says.

Entong clears the mud from his hoe and continues digging.

The air is hushed and the smell of rain is heavy on the breeze. “We forgot to bring an umbrella,” Suwandi says to his wife, who nods agreement. Their 7-year old grandson, dressed in blue, has his hand on his knees and keeps his gaze intently on the open grave. The women look distressed.

When Ali comes over to help wrap the bones, Suwandi asks if the bundle is heavy. Ali says it isn’t. Three men wrap the bundle tightly and hand the bones to Suwandi. With steady steps on the slippery, rain-soaked earth, Suwandi carries his son to a prepared burial site, mouthing a silent prayer.

A little way up the road from where Rachmad was originally buried, a gaping hole six feet deep awaits. The small congregation stops, and Suwandi hands the bundle to a gravedigger as he jumps in the grave. The body is gently returned to him and the gravediggers tell him to open the bundle. “All of it,” says one as the other balls up chunks of soil with his hands. “It is to prop up the body so it does not overturn,” he explains.

Suwandi carefully tucks his son into his resting place and two men start to fill in the grave. An imam in a black velvet skullcap, propping himself up with a multicolored umbrella, asks for the name of the deceased and begins a low chant. Only the boy’s name, Rachmad, rings out as the imam crouches by the grave. All else is quiet save for the sound of hoes hitting the ground.

The mother opens a prayer book, her face partially hidden under her black jilbab as she prays along with the imam. Her grandson stands behind her, holding her arm.

Suwandi straightens his son’s old headstone and turns his palms up to the sky. The imam moves toward him and they pray side by side. The earth atop Rachmad’s new grave is choppy and uneven but Ali explains it will be tidied later. He takes out a clove cigarette, lights it and stands before this new grave he will also care for.

A warm wind blows. From a nearby mosque, the resonant call to prayers rings out, echoed softly by surrounding mosques.

(photos: JG/Yudhi Sukma Wijaya)

I forgot to post these earlier, but here are a few photos of our Halloween costumes this year.

Kathy and I went as Dia de los Muertos skeletons. I painted my noggin like a plain white skull, while Kathy got really detailed and decorated her face with intricate patterns and designs. Pretty awesome.

Click on each image to view a larger version:

What did everyone else go as? Post pictures!

Next year we’re going as white people,

-Shady

It’s quite ironic, but I couldn’t seem to get this piece published anywhere. 

Now I know what you’re thinking – oh wow! A struggling writer turns to a blog to get her work into public discourse, the ingenuity! But give me a break, Im only 19.

Anyway, here you go – the piece no-one wanted. Let the blogging begin.

Australia’s got cold feet

Citius Altius Fortius – you know, faster, higher, stronger; it’s the Olympic motto. We all learn it in primary school, and every four years even the most inactive of Australians cannot help but be entrapped by it. Sitting in our front-row armchair seats, we cheer on our nation’s athletes to victory in distant lands. You have to love that kind of patriotism – well for the Summer Olympics anyway. See; add that white sheath of precipitation and suddenly, most of us lose interest.

12/02/2010- it’s the day that the 21^st Winter Olympiad begins in Vancouver, Canada. And before you ask, yes, I am counting down. Whilst my enthusiasm is clearly an extremity, it concerns me that no-one else in this country seems to display even the slightest bit of excitement for this upcoming cultural festivity! Quite simply – our nation has no care for the Winter Olympics.

Sure, everybody knows about ‘that guy’ who managed Australia’s first gold medal after his competitors conveniently stacked it on the finish line (Steven Bradbury, men’s 1000m short track speed skating, Salt Lake City, U.S.A 2002). Perhaps for some, the name Alisa Camplin will also ring a bell for her success in the same year (if not for her skiing, then the follow up ‘Extra’ gum commercials should do it). But do you know who Zali Steggall is? How can it be that such a self-confessed sport-fanatic nation loses all momentum for the highest of competitive forums – the Olympics?

The answer is actually pretty obvious – a clear lack of success, most of our country consists of desert and the highest Australian mountain does not allow for sufficient training facilities. Do not let this fool you, the Winter Games are undervalued. It is my intention to convert the masses. From this very moment, I urge you to jump on board the Vancouver bobsled. Channel our Jamaican friends from Cool Runnings (1993) and “feel the rhythm, feel the rhyme”, come on now – it’s winter time!

At this point, you may be questioning my unusual infatuation for this spectacle. It’s just snow, right? Well, I like to think of the Winter Olympics as being similar to Eurovision – an unconventionally entertaining geography lesson, which sometimes gives you the giggles, and sometimes makes you nod your head in approval. For me, the interest began back in 1998. Although I was only in Grade Two at the time, every night I would sit up with Sandy Roberts and Gary Wilkinson in Nagano, Japan, and be bewildered by disciplines I didn’t know to be humanly possible, set against the bright image of an arctic landscape. Bit of a romanticised reflection, but I’d never seen snow before and additionally hooked by the Olympic hype being generated for the then upcoming 2000 Sydney games, I was an instant fan.

 t is in our nature, as a modern Pacific island, to mock these sporting cultural norms of our foreign counterparts, and one would assume that this unfamiliarity is a key reason behind disinterest. Yet, it is for this same disparity that I believe we should embrace the Games with curiosity. Until 2006, I had never been skiing. Even then, I was frequently passed by French toddlers, as I struggled to just remain upright for more than five minutes! My point is, alpine sports are not intrinsic to Australian people (nor a natural skill) and for two weeks once every four years, it provides a great contrast to observe winter experts at their (and the summit’s) peak.

Let me give you a bit of context – the first ‘official’ Winter Olympiad took place in 1924 in Chamonix, France. Technically, it was not recognised until a year later, and at the time was celebrated as “International Winter Sports Week” (see – undervalued!). This, however, was not the first infiltration of icy events to the games. 1908 saw the inclusion of figure skating in the London program, and the 1920 Antwerp competition added Ice Hockey to this list, for which, unsurprisingly the first gold was awarded to Canada. Whilst we now expect that the Summer and Winter Games alternate every two years, this ruling was not stipulated by the IOC (International Olympic Committee) until 1986. Prior to this, the Olympic Charter had declared both competitive forms to be held in the same year. With the exception of St. Moritz (1948), Australia has participated in each Olympiad since 1936.

Like any sporting festival, the Winter Olympics have not been without intriguing highlights. Forget Steven Bradbury, in the 1994 Lillehammer (Norway) games, the final of the men’s 1000m short track speed skating, finished with the awarding of just two medals; going to Koreans who remained standing after an extreme amount of disqualifications and falls.

Skiing, skating and bobsledding have long provided the platform for the Winter Olympic program, but in recent times there are a few other unique sports which, in essence, only give you more incentive to switch into Vancouver this February. Snowboarding sees the ‘cool kids’ of the snow come out to play. Australian, Torah Bright finished 5^th in Torino (2006), but will use her goofy stance to start as a real medal hope next year, having won 6 of the last 8 major titles she has competed in. The need for speed is intense on the luge (feet first) and skeleton (head first) tracks, where tenths of a second can be the difference between finishing on the podium and finishing last. Did you know that the biathlon combines cross-country skiing with rifle shooting? But nothing can compare to the inevitable marvel at the sport of curling. Using a large broom (that’s its official name), competitors move large stones down the ice, in a lawn bowls-like attempt to get it as close to the centre of their team’s ring as possible. My friends, this stuff is gold!

It was always my intention to go to the 2010 Vancouver games. However, thanks to the fact I didn’t win Tattslotto’s $90mil (or rather, my inability to save), this dream won’t be. But you can join me in generating the Olympic spirit here in Australia! Get ready to befriend Miga, Quatchi and Sumi (the Olympic mascots) in Canada, and sit back for some better late-night viewing than Gunthy-Renker home shopping (the time difference will most likely see the broadcast in such hours).

Oh and by the way, Zali Steggall took home Australia’s first ever individual winter medal, earning herself a bronze in the Women’s Alpine Skiing Slalom; fittingly, in 1998 at Nagano.

All that I can say is, Trivia sucks… Big time… Big boring time…

Sigh, to be honest it’s a very biased trivia too. All the questions were favoring the older crowd. And since we actually had two people on my team born in the 1980s I didn’t think it was fair. Plus the part at the end to do with the guess the tune thingy, that’s just crap. Music from the 1970’s and 80’s. Hmmm… Guess what I was like a baby then.. The only two questions I knew the answer to were the two mathematical questions.

Not to mention the whole need to dress up thing. And our team chose to be skeletons. It wasn’t too bad, it was just not many in our team actually dressed up. I was pretty impressed with Wayde. He went full out. That was pretty cool. Kudos to him. My outfit was super lame. I pretty much couldn’t fit into any of the outfits at the costume store therefore had to revert to cutting pieces of bones from A4 paper and sticking them onto black shirt.

And… I was seated with a whole bunch of moms and dads. Sigh, me and Wayde were getting so bored it was not funny. Oh well, it wasn’t that bad, overall a lot of fun things happened. Maybe when I get some pictures I’ll blog about it somemore. Nothing is really coming back to me right now.

Frank Rommel gewann den 2. Weltcup der Saison. Der Zella-Mehliser war in der Eisrinne von Lake Placid zweimal der Schnellste und verwies mit fast einer halben Sekunde Vorsprung den Winterberger Sandro Stielicke und den Weltcup-Führenden Martins Dukurs (Lettland) auf die Plätze.

Bei den Damen wurde die Oberhoferin Marion Trott hinter der Kanadierin Mellisa Hollingsworth, die auch im Weltcup führt, und der Britin Shelley Rudman auf Platz 3.

The Life and Death of the Identity

If you have been reading my posts you may have guessed that a major driver for me has been awakening.  I have enthusiastically followed a path that has moved me to ever deepening levels of understanding about the true nature of being, consistently opening up and dropping into places within me that now hold no identity, where the personal is totally unimportant, and the impulse of pure, unrestricted creation is able to shine out.  As I have shed the structures that have held my identity, I have come across some interesting challenges in relating to others and in relating to all those things to which our culture in the West gives value.    

I have been looking at my experiences as my relationship to the ego and identity – prime structures of separation – have changed and how that relates to my movement through life back towards the pulse of Creation….. It starts for us all around the time of birth when we come into form, into Life, and create an I-dentity.

The ego-identity is part of the personality structure that develops throughout life.  As a young child we are loved, nurtured, fed, held….or not.  Out of these experiences we individuate into the people that we bring into our relationships both with ourselves and with others. We individuate from our parents but also from the pure impulse of Life, learning ways that hold us apart from the true nature of our beings as unfettered expressions of all creation. We move from a state of universal union in which the heart freely resonates with everything, without fear, to one that sees itself as a unique thing, separate, special, quantifiable, defended, and we develop a personality with defenses formed by fears related to perceived threats to our survival.  These defenses create protective armoring not only in our musculature – affecting how we hold our bodies – but in how we express our energy through our emotional and mental responses to specific situations. With the fleshing out of our defenses, the ego is fully formed and with it a sense of ‘I’ – the I-dentity is born.  And the bulk of this happens before our 7^th birthdays!! 

None of us, unless Avataric, are spared this process of separation from the Mystery that is the Divine Creator.  As we incarnate numerous veils of separation are created with the strength and resistance of Teflon, yet so thin as to be almost undetectable to microscopic ethereal examination.  They are part of the spiritual skeleton of our beings. The presence of these veils makes any evolutionary move back into the unified field of pure creation impossible.  You cannot awaken with them in place, and your unique life challenges and dramas will continue to repeat themselves for as long as you identify with the places of forgetting that they support.  Unless spiritual evolution is one of your drivers they are unlikely to go, and you are equally unlikely to be interested in what might be the deeper truth behind your identity.  But if it is, and when they do go, the ego can no longer hold onto its position as the leading character in the play that is your life, and so you lose your identity.

The persona that we identify with is reinforced throughout our lives, firstly by our parents who name us and generally instill in us certain values, beliefs, and prejudices that create the foundations of our realities.  Then the reflection of our friends, acquaintances, and life experiences are added to the pot, and all these elements are embraced by our egos.  Our identity, unique and separate, is then constantly reinforced by whoever we come into contact with.  It happens on many levels but the first one is likely to be on meeting someone, when the questions we ask help form an impression of ‘self’ and ‘other’ in our minds. These ‘I am’s….’ that we exchange with each other help us to relate and each question asked builds an instantaneous picture, giving a sense of identity, interests and lifestyle.  For example:

What do you do?                        ‘I am an art consultant/I am an energy therapist’

Where do you come from?         ‘I am English, and I live in New York’

You can change your identity superficially by leaving your job without having the security of another to go to, or selling your home without any plans to find another, as I did. Either will most likely send a tremor of anxiety through your community of family and friends, and you may find that they attempt to lure you back by sending out tendrils of fear unconsciously designed to scare you back into the fold.  You will be breaking the accepted mold, leaving behind the identity that defines you to them, and which they have helped you forge.  You will probably find that you need to make adjustments as you create new relationships that reflect the movements in the axis of your existence. 

Evolutionary levels of transformation and the human response to it, will occur when you move from merely swopping or adding identities to undermining core positions and beliefs, and the supports that hold them in place. When you do this the ego will be seriously threatened and the nature of the ego-identity has to adapt or die.  Surface changes, like the ones mentioned above, can be the forerunners of the seismic movements that are going on in the inner planes of your being as you start dissolving the structures of your existence, and so too your I-dentity.  A signature of significant change is the dropping away of things, habits, and people whose presence in your life no longer resonate with you or serve you.  In relationships, if you can’t bridge the divides that can form as you change – and the onus falls on you to do this – then you will find that gradually your worlds drift apart.

As you embrace a new direction and challenge the nature of reality your extremely resilient ego is dented, but it takes on the changes as if it was going to gain from the direction you are taking.  It embraces this change from an intellectual place and creates a new identity as you embark on your search for the truth.  My ego-identity took on the identity of a spiritual path AND the spiritual seeker alongside the existing identities and the defended personality structures it already ruled.  It was happy!  It was behind this new venture!  Everything was under control, and all was well in its new world.  My interest in returning to Source had become something that my I-dentity , my ego, embraced as being fruitful to its long term wellbeing as an individual, even though it was not.  It didn’t recognize that it had everything to lose – that for it the perception of gain was just another illusion. 

Personally speaking, my journey is not unique.  Like many, I created a fabulous and strong ego that allowed me to successfully navigate the challenges that I met on my life’s path.  The impulse to awaken to the true nature of my being was not apparent to me and it didn’t start to emerge until I was in my 30s and I started to feel some dissatisfaction with what I was creating in my life. Whether we know it consciously or not, there is generally a subliminal pull that leads us, by hook or by crook, forward towards a reunion with Self. Until that point the ego, and its many masks, rules.  In my case it was never asked to step aside and allow what was behind the mask of identity to come through, because there was no awareness that there was anything other to relate with.  My identity until that time, had shifted, morphed, been knocked a little, but remained clear.  Looking back, I can chart how I, as an adult, moved through life and how I got to where I am today.  My true nature remained quietly hidden, waiting until I got fed up with the play that I had created. It has gone something like this:

• I lived a materially successful and socially active life – I conformed with the accepted standards of my peers to a large degree.
• I started to get panic attacks when some of the most painful relational woundings of my childhood began to appear in my adult relationships.  My passion for my work into which I had put 100% of my being was seriously compromised and I turned to the healing arts for help, through therapy and hands-on healing.
• I connected, with the help of my healer, to parts of me that I never realized existed before or had forgotten – I experienced expanded states of being and became fascinated with quantum theories and realities.
• I started to read about, train in, and experience other levels of existence. My awareness and my energetic container expanded enormously.
• I found teachers who reflected to me the true nature of being and encouraged me as I stepped into the stream of the awakening path.  Their awake and aware consciousness helped me to evolve.
• I stopped planning, dropped structure, and went with the flow of Life.   I sold my apartment and put all my belongings with the exception of a suitcase of clothes into storage and I traveled to places around the world that I felt called to visit. 
• I lost my sense of the personal; my sense of being in any way special; my identity with a spiritual or any other path; my templates for existence, and my identity.

It wasn’t until the supports that maintained the drama of my existence began to crumble that the ego’s throttle-hold on my life weakened, and so did my sense of identity.  But it wasn’t until the core veils went that held me in separation from Self, that the nature of my journey shifted.  I had had transcendent experiences, tastes of bliss or emptiness that felt like they must be what enlightenment is all about, but until the structures of separation disappeared, I didn’t recognize that these were little more than expanded states, amazing experiences that have very little to do with true awakening.  My I-dentity remained intact until the intellectual understanding dropped from my head and traveled right through my heart into the core of existence.  Often, for this to happen, you are called to face your greatest fear – the one that holds your deepest life-long wounding – and this is what happened for me too.  Only by surrendering did the structures that I had thought were there to protect me reveal themselves to be keeping me from my heart’s desire for reunion with the Beloved, the Creator of All that Is, and with this awareness they dissolved.  When this happens there is no choice but to wake up from your dream to the reality that there is ‘no one’ there. 

Firstly, and most importantly, you wake up to the knowledge that there is no personal I-dentity with who you were.  When you actively hunt for it in the corridors and rooms of your existence there is no ‘I’.  I was then aware that I am nothing but an expression of the pulse of creation. This knowing was slim at the beginning, but as I started to live life from this place, embodying it as fully as I could, each aspect of identity that had built up over the course of my life started to crumble.  For me it was two years from a point where I recognized that the Identity had gone to a point where I had embodied this awareness to a place of real understanding.  Like me, you may feel echoes of your identity through the conditioned responses that still trigger you – and language demands that you refer to it all the time – but the seeker, the do-er, the sense of personal, they go, along with other aspects of your being.  For me, one amazing part of this was in finding commonality with beautiful or mundane lifeforms around me, and really seeing that with the ‘death’ of my ego-identity I was just another essence expressed in Life, no different from any other, and part of the whole.

This life is a journey, that’s for sure! The death of the identity is not The End.  It is one step deeper into The Mystery!

©2009 Sarah Lidsey

36 2 Go

• OMG…Overslept this morning…hate doing that…it throws my entire day out of synch. It was Jourdies fault…she slept at Emmas last night, so when my alarm went off..I though…Ohhhhh…I can have an extra hour because there is no school run…instead of resetting the alarm I just got back into bed….and back into a deep deep sleep…AGhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
• I am so so glad its Friday…after last weeks attack of the pigs im still exhausted and this week has been very long indeed…chilling tonight with a glass of red…out with the gang tomorrow for some much needed Vodka/Sambucca therapy.

Peter Andre’s Phone Bill Must Be Huge..He Just Keeps Voting

I’m Katie Price… Get Me Out Of Here! Jordan threatens to quit I’m A Celeb over trial torment

Katie Price has revealed she is on the verge of walking away from I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! as the public backlash over her return to the jungle becomes too much to bear. The glamour model has only been in the jungle for five days, but the public have already voted for her to do a string of ghastly ‘Bushtucker Trials’ on the ITV reality show. And it may be they are enacting their revenge after being forced to wade through endless headlines about her split from her ex-husband, singer Peter Andre. In the live section of tonight’s show, Miss Price looked dismayed when she learned she would have to take part in her fourth bushtucker trial on Friday night.

Relatives of the star have now said they believe viewers are punishing her because of her outrageous antics during a high-profile divorce from Andre. Miss Price has now endured three trials and is set to attempt a fourth one in Friday’s episode. On last night’s show, she said: ‘I’m absolutely ready to leave camp.’ She said she was pining for her children, severely-disabled son Harvey, seven, her son with footballer Dwight Yorke, alongside son Junior, four, and daughter Princess Tiaamii, her children with Andre. The brunette, who had been covered in cockroaches and bugs, forced underwater in a pond full of larvae and through dark tunnels infested with rats for her challenges, insisted: ‘I’ve had enough. ‘I miss my children. I’m hungry. I want a nice bed and I don’t want to have to put myself through these horrible challenges. I don’t like it.’

Who’s it gonna be? Katie insisted she knew it would be her when she was put up against Gino Di Campo Earlier this week she suffered a panic attack after crawling through the tunnels. Yet she was also picked for another task which involved her swimming through a pool of baby crocodiles as well as a live trial on Wednesday night. Giving her thoughts on being picked again, she said: ‘I think the public want to give me a bad time. ‘You can’t take it personally even though it’s hard not to. They’ve seen me battered for the last 3 or 4 days.  Let someone else have a go.’ Katie’s mother, Amy, and brother Danny yesterday likened her treatment to someone being stoned to death in ancient Rome.

Speaking on ITV1’s This Morning, Danny said: ‘She has this façade of being very strong, controlling, not showing any emotion, but there is a side to her that’s very vulnerable and insecure.’ Asked about Katie constantly being chosen to take part in the Bushtucker Trials, her mother said: ‘It’s very painful but we told her ‘you know you’re going to get every trial. ‘It’s like let’s stone them, it’s like the gladiators. They’re taking out their spite on her.’ Wednesday’s trial saw Miss Price trying to retrieve a number of stars with her teeth, the first from a pool of gunk and the second from a tangle of mealworms. She then had to retrieve objects hidden in a sphere of snakes, dive into a pool of baby crocodiles, drink a glass of ‘beetlejuice’, put her hands in gloves filled with ants and then pick up live eels.

Earlier in the week she had to be lifted out of a dark tunnel after a gruelling bushtucker trial in which she had to crawl through a series of rat and cockroach infested tunnels in the dark and collect stars to win food for the rest of the camp. But when the small space was flooded with water, the model – who suffered a swimming accident as a child – panicked, and shouted to be pulled free. She was close to tears and shaking when she came out and hyperventilated as medical staff tried to calm her down. Meanwhile, the star also talked about ex-husband Peter Andre on the show.

Fellow contestant Justin Ryan said: ‘One of the hardest things about splitting up with Peter and it must be so much more difficult for you is the division. Camp Katie and Camp Peter.’ Katie replied: ‘I don’t know who started all that. It’s pathetic. We’re both human beings. So many people get divorced.  So many people every day, you know.’ When Justin suggested that it would be good if the two could remain friends she replied: ‘I’d love that. I’d absolutely love that. If I had it my way. It’s nice for the kids to have both their parents and both get on.’ Sam Fox said that she hoped that the couple would end up talking for the children’s’ sake. ‘It will happen,’ added Price. ‘It’ll probably take a few years.’

Also in Thursday’s episode, the camp were split into two groups in a battle for Base Camp. The winning team would be excluded from the first vote off and live in the relative luxury of base camp, while the others would be forced live in Exile and over the next few days will have to compete in Bush Battles. The winner of each day’s Bush Battle would have immunity from the first vote off and will return to live in Base Camp.With the two teams  chosen, they all stood on wooden platforms underneath buckets holding poles pressed against a button on the bottom of the bucket.

Queen of clean: Kim Woodburn is horrified to be staying in Exile Camp after losing the bush battle One false move and the contents would be released and that celebrity eliminated. One by one, each celebrity was eliminated before Sabrina Washington was declared the winner. With team leader Colin, Sabrina and her teammates Justin, Katie, Jimmy and Joe returned to Base Camp which had been transformed into a relative jungle paradise. Katie enthused: ‘I’m so relieved.  It’s like returning home.’ The camp had been transformed, furnished with camp chairs, pillows for the beds, dressing gowns, firewood and purified water.

Samantha Fox is disgusted to see a rat in exile camp

The group were thrilled to learn they would have additional food delivered that night and found chocolate and cold beers in the caravan. Meanwhile, Lucy led her losing teammates Gino, Stuart, George, Sam and Kim to the Exile camp, which was nothing but a simple clearing with one log and one bed. The camp contained only the bare essentials and the camp mates were horrified to see rats running around. Ex-Hollyoaks actor Stuart even managed to catch one and place it outside of their clearing. Queen of Clean Kim was disgusted and declared ‘I couldn’t take much more of this filth.’

Funny Story…Poor Guy

I went to the Home Depot recently while not being altogether sure that course of action was a wise one. You see, the previous evening I had
prepared and consumed a massive quantity of my patented ‘you’re definitely going to s**t yourself’ road kill chili. Tasty stuff, albeit hot to the point of being painful, which comes with a written guarantee from me that if you eat it, the next day both of your butt cheeks WILL fall off.
Here’s the thing. I had awakened that morning, and even after two cups of coffee (and all of you know what I mean) nothing happened. No ‘Watson’s Movement 2′. Despite habanera peppers swimming their way through my intestinal tract, I was unable to create the usual morning
symphony referred to by my dear wife as ‘thunder and lightning’. Knowing that a time of reckoning HAD to come, yet not sure of just when,
I bravely set off for the Depot, my quest being paint and supplies to refinish the den..
Upon entering the store at first all seemed normal. I selected a cart and began pushing it about dropping items in for purchase. It wasn’t until I was at the opposite end of the store from the restrooms that the pain hit me.
Oh, don’t look at me like you don’t know what I’m talking about. I’m referring to that ‘Uh, Oh, S**t, gotta go’ pain that always seems to hit us at the wrong time. The thing is, this pain was different. The habaneros in the chili from the night before were staging a revolt. In a mad rush for freedom they bullied their way through the small intestines, forcing their way into the large intestines, and before I could take one step in the direction of the restrooms which would bring sweet relief, it happened. The peppers fired a warning shot. There I stood, alone in the paint and stain section, suddenly enveloped in a noxious cloud the likes of which has never before been recorded. I was afraid to move for fear that more of this vile odor might escape me. Slowly, oh so slowly, the pressure seemed to leave the lower part of my body, and I began to move up the aisle and out of it, just as an red aproned clerk turned the corner and asked if I needed any help. I don’t know what made me do it, but I stopped to see what his reaction would be to the malodorous effluvium that refused to dissipate. Have you ever been torn in two different directions emotionally? Here’s what I mean, and I’m sure some of you at least will be able to relate. I could’ve warned that poor clerk, but didn’t. I simply watched as he walked into an invisible, and apparently indestructible, wall of odor so terrible that all he could do before gathering his senses and running, was to stand there blinking and waving his arms about his head as though trying to ward off angry bees. This, of course, made me feel terrible, but then made me laugh.. ……..BIG mistake!!!!!
Here’s the thing. When you laugh, it’s hard to keep things ‘clamped down’, if you know what I mean. With each new guffaw an explosive issue burst forth from my nether region. Some were so loud and echoing that I was later told a few folks in other aisles had ducked, fearing that
someone was robbing the store and firing off a shotgun. Suddenly things were no longer funny. ‘It’ was coming, and I raced off through the store towards the restrooms, laying down a cloud the whole way, praying that I’d make it before the grand mal assplosion took place.
Luck was on my side. Just in the nick of time I got to the john, began the inevitable ‘Oh my God’, floating above the toilet seat because my ass is burning SO BAD, purging. One poor fellow walked in while I was in the middle of what is the true meaning of ‘Shock and Awe’ . He made a gagging sound, and disgustedly said, ‘Sono@##!, did it smell that bad when you ate it?’, then quickly left. Once finished and I left the restroom, reaquired my partially filled cart intending to carry on with my shopping when a store employee approached me and said, ‘Sir, you might want to step outside for a few minutes. It appears some prankster set off a stink bomb in the store. The manager is going to run the vent fans on high for a minute or two which ought to take care of the problem.’ My smirking of course set me off again, causing residual gases to escape me. The employee took one sniff, jumped back pulling his shirt up to cover his nose and, pointing at me in an accusing manner shouted, ‘IT’S YOU!’, then ran off returning moments later with the manager. I was unceremoniously escorted from the premises and asked none too kindly not
to return. Home again without my supplies, I realized that there was nothing to eat but leftover chilli, so I consumed two more bowls. The next day I went to shop at Lowe’s. I can’t say anymore about that because we are in court over the whole matter.
Jerks claim they’re going to have to repaint the store..

Mystery of Death Valley’s gliding rocks

These extraordinary pictures reveal a bizarre event that is puzzling the science world – rocks that glide across the desert.Amid the eerie silence and the 50C heat of California’s Death Valley these giant boulders appear to move smoothly – and unaided – across the desert.The rocks, some as heavy as 17 stone, edge along in bizarre, straight-line patterns across the ultra-flat surface of the valley. They can travel more than 350 yards a year.

Er… how did that get there? One of the extraordinary moving rocks leaves a track through Death Valley Scientists believe the phenomenon is caused by a coming together of specific weather conditions.Studies suggest a combination of 90mph winds, ice formations at night and thin layers of wet clay on the surface of the desert all help to push them along. Photographer Mike Byrne, 40, has spent years documenting the stones’ mysterious movements. As his amazing pictures show these real-life rolling stones leave trails across the sand in places almost untouched by man. He said: ‘Some of these rocks are as heavy as a person, it is really is strange to imagine them gliding across the desert like this. ‘They must be the original real-life rolling stones, they just keep moving through the sand and I don’t believe anyone has really 100 per cent worked it out yet.

More of the boulders and the eerie paths they leave across the Valley

‘Most of the stones are found on an old lake bed, known as the Racetrack Playa, where the ground is particularly flat.’It has been documented over the years and it is something very special to witness, although I know climatologists believe the phenomenon could disappear in a few years as the temps continue to rise.’One of the strongest theories about what the rocks move is that water rising from beneath the surface of the sand is pushed by the wind creating a surface the rocks can move along.’Death Valley is the lowest point in the U.S., at 282ft below sea level.It is almost completely flat and holds the record for the second highest temperature ever recorded on earth, a blistering 58C.In the 1990s a study by a team of scientists lead by Professor John Reid, from Hampshire College, Massachusetts, attempted to explain the rocks’ movement.His study concluded that the rocks may be moved when they become embedded in sheets of ice forming at night on the surface of the sand.As the sand melts Prof Reid said that the rocks were moved along by the ice and wind, thus forming the patterns.

Sorry …But This Guy Is A Prick

Revealed: The Newcastle footballer who couldn’t get by on £75,000 a week

The star also had lucrative sponsorship deals with various companies including Pepsi and Nike but had not been paid for these until NVA stepped in to get the contracts honoured, bringing in thousands of pounds.Before they managed his affairs Martins had not been paid a penny for his image rights on Newcastle United shirts and mugs. He had received nothing from his sponsorship deals and could not even find the contracts he had originally signed.NVA said it also organised travel visas, a passport, his mortgage and property valuations, and was constantly going up to Newcastle from its London offices for him.Mr Tennink told Judge Richard Seymour, QC: ‘Day to day life with superstars is demanding and superstars are demanding.’Martins, who owned several fast cars including a top-of-the-range £85,000 Porsche Cayenne 4×4, spent the money on a lifestyle of luxurious penthouse homes and fine dining.He owned a large multimillion pound home in the exclusive footballers’ enclave of Darras Hall, near Ponteland, Northumbria, and rented an opulent flat overlooking Newcastle upon Tyne’s trendy Quayside.The striker, who was sold for £9million to German side Wolfsburg after Newcastle were relegated from the Premier League earlier this year, paid NVA £67,500 in January last year and another £25,000 in April last year but NVA claims it is still owed over £300,000.Martins, who was not in court yesterday, is fighting the claim and the hearing is scheduled to last for three days.

Everything you never knew you wanted to know about Jedward

They are, without doubt, the sensation of the moment: two quiff-haired innocents, who can neither sing nor dance but have taken the country by storm. Everyone’s talking about Jedward.

The twins’ outfit last week consisted of silver suits from Topshop. X Factor stylists were still sticking tiny mirrors on the collars minutes before they went on stage to perform

WHICH WAS BORN FIRST? John and Edward Grimes were born on October 16, 1991, at the Rotunda Hospital in Dublin. John is the elder, by ten minutes. The twins were delivered three months early, at 28 weeks, and weighed just 2lb each. They were given only a 50 per cent chance of survival. Both spent weeks in an incubator before being allowed home. Their father John said: ‘They were so small and fragile, but thankfully they pulled through. They have always had a bond and I think it goes right back to that.’

BOYS TO MEN The boys grew up in a large home in the village of Rathangan, Co Kildare, with their brother Kevin, who is a year older. Their father John is a computer expert and their mother Susanna a secondary school teacher.

X Factor experts have refined the look of the twins who don’t mind trying out garish outfits

Their parents wanted them to have a bedroom each, but they stayed together because they missed each other so much. They boarded at The King’s Hospital, a private £6,000-a-year school, in Dublin, until they were 12. John says they were bullied, physically and verbally. ‘I think it was because we stuck out a lot,’ he said. A local describes them as ‘eternal oddballs’. Their parents split up and they now live with Mum in Lucan, a suburb of Dublin. They attend the posh private Institute of Education. Their mother says they have always been ‘music mad’ and love Robbie Williams and the Backstreet Boys. Last summer they scaled the four highest mountains in England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales for charity. Asked where they see themselves in ten years, they said: ‘We see ourselves as being a bit older.’ They came 7th and 13th in an Irish schools’ mountain run this year and John won a bronze in the 1500m at an under-19 indoor championships last March – Edward was fifth and six seconds slower.

ACTING UP Simon Cowell detested their arrogance on sight, calling them ‘vile little creatures who would step on their mother’s head to have a hit’. Their athletics teacher Ann McGee says she thinks the apparent cockiness is just an act. ‘They’re lovely lads and I think they are probably playing up to the camera.’

Their head teacher Jim D’Arcy agrees: ‘Their persona on the show must be a bit staged because they’re not arrogant. I’ve never had a second of trouble from them and the teachers love them.’ Described by an X Factor spokesman as ‘truly very sweet boys’, they have made a pact to sign their autograph for every fan who asks. Edward says: ‘We sign crazy stuff, from iPods to arms, to everything in the dictionary!’

WHICH IS WHICH? Pay attention: there are several key differences. Edward has more orangey hair, bushier eyebrows and better skin. His teeth are a fraction snagglier. The clearest giveaway is that John has a pointy right ear. He also has pierced ears, a scar on his forehead and never stops talking. John at 5ft 11in is about an inch taller than Edward, though they wear the same size clothes. On the advice of producers, the twins have started to do the Ant and Dec trick of always standing in the same order to help people differentiate. As you look at them, John is always on the left and Edward on the right.

ONE STEP BEHIND Edward always seems to be a little more off-key and out of step. However, X Factor singing coach Yvie Burnett says they do have potential. As well as spending two hours a week with each of the contestants teaching them their songs, Yvie says: ‘I do mother them. Singing can be psychological and if they are down or not feeling confident my job is to bring them back up.’ Their full names are John Paul Henry Daniel Richard Grimes and Edward Peter Anthony Kevin Patrick Grimes

HAIR RAISING The pair claim it takes only ‘five seconds’ and a dollop of gel to get their 3in quiffs ready in the morning. When they perform, though, their quiffs are backcombed, gelled and sprayed into submission by the studio hair and make-up team. According to chief stylist Faye Sawyer, when she first met them their hair was all sticking up ‘like Rhydian on acid. We tried to tone it down and make it look more soft and more quiffy’. One friend from Ireland says: ‘They have always had the big hair.’ Not surprisingly, they are expected to land a big money deal to plug a haircare brand the minute they leave the show.

The boys came into X Factor with a big love of high-top trainers

THE TRAIL BLAZERS When the twins turned up to the X Factor auditions they already had their own style – blazers and high-top trainers they call ‘runners’. Stylists then set about tweaking it all into the image we now know and love. ‘Their look is based on the Eighties, which were in turn inspired by the Fifties, so there’s the quiff, the jackets and drainpipes,’ says Faye Sawyer. The red shiny jackets the twins wore in Britney Spears week were made especially from patent leather, in homage to Britney’s famous red catsuit. The jackets are likely to be auctioned in aid of the show’s support for Great Ormond Street Hospital. Last week’s silver suits were from Topshop and stylists were still sticking tiny mirrors on the collars with hot glue guns ten minutes before John and Edward were due on stage. ‘They are like male models. They can wear anything,’ says Faye.

CEREALGATE Jedward are very noisy in the X Factor house – getting up at 7am and playing music loudly enough to annoy the rest of the contestants. They also have bubblegum blowing contests – John apparently blows bigger bubbles. The twins like to wear odd socks. They split two pairs between them, so they have one of each colour The twins eat vast amounts of cereal – with water, because they think dairy products give them spots. Sometimes they ‘borrow’ food from housemates – leading to Jamie Archer, Olly Murs and Danyl Johnson marking their cereal boxes with ‘Keep Off!’ signs. Meanwhile, Danyl also spends time sulking. He can’t understand how Jedward are becoming ever more popular.

GROUNDED! It has been mayhem outside the X Factor house in London’s Golders Green for the past few weeks, with hundreds of teenage girls camped outside. Neighbours have complained about some of Jedward’s fans who try to flash their underwear at the twins. A guard at the house said: ‘John and Edward are not allowed out – it’s studio’s orders. They cause too much chaos.’

Which is which? John and Edward may look identical but there are subtle differences to tell them apart

THE HATE MAIL John says: ‘We get hate mail and vicious letters. Some is so bad X Factor haven’t let us see it. It’s hard when we have to go out and perform and be happy and confident and smiley because we know if we slip up they’ll come after us. We know a lot of people hate us. I get so upset by it I can’t sleep. It goes round and round in my head. ‘We’ve had a gang come up to us in the street, saying ‘There’s those twins’ and they came after us. We had to run away. Edward was shaken and upset. I had to calm him down and tell him not to think about it.’ A fortnight ago, their mentor Louis Walsh became so rattled by the booing from the studio audience he was caught on camera flashing a two-fingered gesture at the offenders. He said: ‘They were calling them awful things. It’s not a football match. John and Edward’s family are there.’ He added: ‘It’s just a small handful of people in the audience shouting obscenities. I wasn’t letting them get away with it. It’s not right. The boys are only just 18.’ There are at least 40 Facebook pages devoted to getting Jedward off the show. The boys have five dogs and an eight-year-old budgie called Joey at their home near Dublin

OMERTA! Simon Cowell is rather alarmed by the public outcry which followed the controversial result in which the twins were saved while the talented Lucie Jones was sent home. Both Olly Murs and Lloyd Daniels have said that they are ‘not allowed’ to talk about the row in public, on Cowell’s orders. Meanwhile, the twins have personally apologised to Lucie.The truth is that Cowell didn’t want to be seen as the meanie who ended their run on the show. There were more than 4,000 complaints to ITV and 150 to regulator Ofcom.

GHOSTBUSTERS The twins are banned from all tanning products. The make-up artists emphasise their pale Irish complexion. In common with the other finalists, Jedward had £450 of free teeth whitening at the London Centre for Cosmetic Dentistry with top dentist Dr Mervyn Druian, whose clients include Amanda Holden and Carol Vorderman.

The twins look a lot shorter without their high quiffs

WHAM! BAM Wham’s I’m Your Man appears to be the favourite for Jedward to perform tomorrow night, but the contest is notorious for last-minute changes. If ever a theme was geared towards the twins’ strengths, it must be this one. Blond highlights, a tendency to bounce around on stage, and the obvious fact they are a pop duo should all help John and Edward. The stylists have not yet settled on a look, though we are assured it won’t involve a bouffant blow wave, shorts and shoulder pads. Whatever – it sounds as if we are in for another haphazard and wildly entertaining display.

DANCE ENVY? As everyone has noticed, Jedward have benefited from a big production number every week – with pyrotechnics, dancers and elaborate costumes. Naturally, other contestants are jealous. A show spokesman admitted: ‘They’ve had quite a lot of choreography and rehearsal time because there was a need for it.’

CELEB FANS Peaches Geldof (who wants to marry Edward) was spotted wearing a ‘Jed we can!’ T-shirt at a live show. Westlife think they’re hilarious. Ronan Keating, Bono, Colin Farrell are supporters – as, quite frankly, is everyone Irish. And they’ve charmed Robbie Williams and Brian May. David Cameron, Kelly Osbourne, Peter Andre and Michael Buble are also fans. As is Harriet Harman, apparently.

The twins have embraced their nickname

COWELL THE CONVERTED After they beat Lucie, Cowell was dismayed by the backlash from the public and told John and Edward to lie low. He had, of course, been their chief detractor in the first few weeks, but has started to be more encouraging. ‘If you allow – which I think is right – the public to determine who wins, you’ve got to go with it. You don’t have to agree with it, but you have to go with it,’ he said. Any embarrassment Cowell may feel over the success of the tone-deaf twins has been undoubtedly sweetened by the fact that Jedward have already signed a contract (as have all contestants) which means he gets a cut of any commercial deals they do until at least March 2010. They have already received television offers from networks including Disney, Nickelodeon and the BBC. Cowell’s adviser and ex, Sinitta, said: ‘Simon would actually create a show especially for them. Anything but see them win The X Factor.’ The final word on Cowell’s love/hate relationship with them should go to Louis Walsh: ‘I don’t like normal people and Simon’s the same. We hate it when normal people come in to sing. We love them slightly bonkers.’

The other X Factor contestants Olly Murs, Stacey Solomon and Lloyd Daniels take a break from rehearsals

The 11th Husband  !!!

A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to “Please be gentle; I’m still a virgin.”
“What ?” said the puzzled groom.
“How can that be if you’ve been married ten times?”
“Well……..
Husband  #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed  to function; but he said he’d look into it and get back with me.
Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn’t get the system up.
Husband #4 was in Telemarketing;  even though he knew he had the order, he didn’t know when he would be able to deliver..
Husband #5 was an Engineer;  he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
Husband #6 was from Administration;  he thought he knew how but he wasn’t sure whether it was his job or not.
Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.
Husband #8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.
Husband #9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.
Husband #10 was a  Stamp Collector; all he ever did was…………  God I miss him !!.
But now that I’ve married you, I’m so excited”.
Wonderful”, said the husband, but why ?
You’re with the  ” GOVERNMENT “.  .
This time I KNOW I’M gonna get SCREWED.

Funny X Ray

Jumping Your Bones

]]> http://d6plus4.wordpress.com/2009/11/20/some-highlights-from-the-last-game/ Fri, 20 Nov 2009 08:40:58 +0000 anteolsson http://d6plus4.wordpress.com/2009/11/20/some-highlights-from-the-last-game/

So, I want to share with you some cool events from the last adventure i was game leading. The adventure is called Tomb of Regrets. The name and the location of the adventure is directly inspired by the dnd Tomb of Horror and Tomb of Regrets also has a lot of puzzles. The story on the other hand is inpired by Planescape:Torment and my own ideas about life.

The adventure is set in a dark and cold underground building/dungeon where there are many rooms and many doors which requires many different keys and different skills to get into and through.  There is a lot a magic in the dungeon but the magic is not appearant but has to be discoverred rather. And of course there are some monsters in the dungeon.

The first highlight of the game was in the beginning. The playing character started in a small room which had two wooden doors and one stone massive stone door. He found that only one of them was opened so he carefully opened it up, holding a torch in his right hand, to peek inside the next room. He could not see anyone in the next room but unfortunately he had not opened the door enough to see that there was a walking skeleton in the room. So he opened the door fully and to his surprise this skeleton jumped at him first trying to bash him with his shield, which missed, and then stab him with a sword, which also missed. The playing character now did a very nifty thing. He made an attempt to grab the skeleton’s ribs with his both hands, and after he did his roll (1d10 + Strength + Agility) he managed to do so. He then tried to pull the ribs out of their cage and did so with a successful strength check but the bones did not loosen completely. While doing this the skeleton could not hold his body up any longer and so fell forward until its head was between the arms of the playing character. While falling forward the skeleton swinged his sword towards the head of the playing character but he dodged it gracefully and reacted with a right swing with his fist against the skeleton head and made a critical hit. The impact was so forceful that the skeletons head flew off its body and the rest of the bones piled up on the floor except for one bone which the playing character held in his hand. This rib bone he later sharpened and used as a lock pick=)

There was more spectacular fights but that is another story…

Thanks for reading,
Andreas

Just last week, I got a package from Alex over at Dance Party Massacre. I didn’t know what tee I would be receiving, and I was extremely excited to open the mailer up as quickly as my little fingers could go. Inside this envelope were goodies and a tee that I had been eyeing on the DPM site for quite some time! “Fresh 2 Death” is one of my favorite tees from DPM’s second season, and I’m very excited to get the chance to review it!

As you can see, this design includes metallic ink. I’ve never had a tee with shimmery ink before, and I think that it was a perfect addition to this particular design. It would have been boring to see the coins and the “bling” be a plain bronze color without the glitter-effect. Instead, we get to see something that’s more true-to-life on this piece.

This tee came with a custom hangtag. I love it when companies take the extra step to do this because it makes their products look even more professional. This hangtag is nice and simple, which is a good thing because it’s not tacky!

“Fresh 2 Death” also features a custom tag on the left sleeve, as well as a custom printed tag on the inside of the shirt. Again, these are excellent additions to show just how professional this company is.

In terms of print quality, this tee looks beautiful before and after wash. The only difference is that some of the glitter specks in the bronze ink have migrated to other areas of the print after washing, giving them some sparkle. It’s not too big of a deal and you won’t even really notice unless you’re staring at the print (something that I do just for reviewing purposes!).

The details on this print are spectacular and are well-defined on the tee. The print job is terrific, and you can see all of the little details clearly. The artist made sure to illustrate this piece without having the lines be too thin to show up in the print. All in all, I give this design an A+ for translating well from computer image to t-shirt print! I love everything that goes into this composition, and I think that the tee itself is fresh!

Another thing that I love about this design is that it wraps around the torso a little bit. In my opinion, the placement is very unique. While it could have just been smacked right in the center of the tee, making sure that the print ended along the two edges of the shirt, DPM went with a more original route.

I give this t-shirt from Dance Party Massacre two thumbs up for everything–from presentation to print quality. Although I think that $27.95 is quite steep for t-shirts in general, you can be sure that you’ll get a high-quality shirt in return when you order “Fresh 2 Death.” For those living in the U.S., you’ll also be happy to know that shipping is free!

Fear is the Key

TYPE: Action / Adventure

RATING: 8 / 10

REVIEW:

Truly a fast-paced book that you just can’t dare keep down for the fear that you’ll miss out on something in the few seconds that it will take to continue reading it.

The mystery is so very mysterious that I finished the book in a matter of hours and was relieved to find the mystery unveiled and all the puzzle pieces fitted into place. The suspense is unnerving, and the plot keeps thickening at a regular pace; it is well nigh impossible to keep from biting your nails in anticipation of what will happen next.

The latter part of the book is kinda the unwrapping of the entire suspense that has been built up in the former half and the whole thing has been so brilliantly put that even after the story gets over, it leaves you with a sense of an adrenaline rush.

DESCRIPTION:

‘Fear is the Key has a plot that will require a lot of willpower to stop you looking at the last page.’ Sunday Mirror

A sunken DC-3 lies on the Caribbean floor. It’s cargo: ten million, two hundred and fifty thousand dollars in gold ingots, emeralds and uncut diamonds guarded by the remains of two men, a wife and a very small son. The fortune is there for the taking, and ready to grab it are a blue-blooded oilman with his own offshore rig, a gangster so cold and independent that even the Mafia couldn’t do business with him and a hired assassin. Against them stands one man, and the skeletons in their watery grave are his people. His name is Talbot, and he will avenge their murders.

‘Excitement and violence … the pace never slackens.’ Scotsman

I recently have been craving molasses like crazy–eating it on my oatmeal, on pancakes, and craving gingerbread molasses cookies too. My bf hates molasses and the only way I can get him to eat some is by putting it in cookies, so I made sugar molasses cutout cookies. I fucked up the original recipe but actually they turned out better because of it i think. The original recipe was a way softer dough that were to be for round chewy sort of cookies, but I forgot half the butter and had to make it work anyways so I ended up with perfect dough for crunchy cutout cookies. so I made the dough and rolled it out, and I was excited to use my woodland animals cookie cutouts I had. They came out great, and I made an icing to put on top and made most of them into skeleton animals! so cute!

I went out on the night of Halloween to a house in Winston-Salem that decorates like crazy (it is located at the corner of Watson Ave. and Gaston St.).  I had not been by in a few years, and decided to check it out as well as play around with my D300s a little and push its limits in the dark to see how it performed.  I must say I was happy with the results, but you can be the judge.

All of these were shot at 6400 ISO which is as high as she goes.

This last one was in front of another house down the street. Looks strait out of a horror film.

The following is an excerpt from an article originally posted at DeseretNews.com:

Orem native and Mountain View High alum Noelle Pikus-Pace is a world champion skeleton athlete favored by many to win a medal in the 2006 Olympic Games. Then in a freak accident in October of 2005, she was hit by a sled and suffered a broken leg that still causes her pain. She won a spot on the U.S. Olympic team in October with the top female time and is on track to earn a long-awaited trip to the 2010 Winter Games. She lives in Eagle Mountain with her husband and 2-year-old daughter. She took some time with Deseret News sports writer Amy Donaldson to answer some questions at the first World Cup of this season in Park City.

Question: How did you avoid sinking into self-pity after the accident?

Answer: I don’t think I ever did. I felt I had two choices — move forward or look back. I was planning on retiring after the Olympics in 2006. And then, after the accident, my husband and I both decided it wasn’t time for me to be done. My dream has always been the Olympics.

Question: You have said fear and family concerns have been a distraction at times. How have you dealt with that?

Answer: I feel like I’m there now. A lot of it was that my heart was at home with my daughter and my husband. It probably started with the accident and then I have just never been able to get back into that mode. I feel like I am back now. My husband and Lacee, that’s why I’m doing this. This is their dream, too.

Question: Your husband built the sled you are using this year. How did that come about and has it made a difference?

Answer: After the accident, I really wasn’t comfortable on the sled. I know people don’t randomly build a piece of equipment, but he said, “I really want to do this for you.” I really feel comfortable to be on it. … He is as into this as I am and that’s what it’s taken.

Question: When did you first start to see the Olympics as a realistic goal?

Answer: When I was younger, I played softball and ran track, so I was always looking at the Summer Games. I got involved in the skeleton program (at the Utah Olympic Park) … and just before the 2002 games, I was competing (in skeleton).

Click here to read the entire article.

Gen is cursed to protect the nearby village of Thellos from the monsters of the forest. The only way Gen can do this is to possess a villager, giving them the strength and spirit of a legendary hero. That’s not the worst part of Gen’s eternal job. Part of Gen’s curse is to possess a new villager daily, and every single day the new village hero goes mad with power. The worst part of Gen’s job is finding ways to keep the power crazed heroes on-task to protect the village.

Gen’s next hero… Chaleha Thella!

This assignment was to create an anatomical diagram showing the location of organs relative to surface landmarks and skeletal anatomy.

One of the things I have been working on this week is a series of product featuring my photo, Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24, that I took while on a hike in the woods near my home last winter. A ray of sunlight shines down through the snow covered forest, creating a bright icy lacework of tree branches. Four trees surround a small clearing in the woods like a bier, as logs blanketed in snow on the sloping forest floor resemble a skeleton, below icy tree limbs forming a ghostly apparition of a horses face like a trusty steed standing guard.

Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
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Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
Design a refrigerator magnet at zazzle

Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
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Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
Make your own custom made neck tie with Zazzle

Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
magnets online by Zazzle

Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
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Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
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Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
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Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
Shop for a tee shirt on zazzle.com

Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
Create customized t shirts using zazzle

Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
Make a post card at Zazzle

Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
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Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
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Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
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Forest Sun Rays in the Snow #24 by dlmtleArt
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Dawna’s Gallery of greeting cards, Matted Prints. and T shirts

Dawna’s Fine Art Prints at

Dawna’s Zazzle Gallery of items featuring her Art and Photography

The following is an excerpt from an article originally published at sltrib.com:

Zach Lund’s hamstring held up a lot better than the weather. Lund finished fifth in the first World Cup skeleton race of the season at the Utah Olympic Park on Thursday, despite the lingering leg injury that has been limiting his training for the 2010 Vancouver Olympics. “Less than ideal, but a decent result,” the Salt Lake City native called it — and far better than the season debut for which Orem’s Noelle Pikus-Pace had to settle on the women’s side.

An inexplicably slow first run left Pikus-Pace in 13th place in the women’s race, and she barely had finished her second run amid an afternoon blizzard — “I was trying to dodge snowballs on the way down,” she said — before officials canceled the race because of visibility problems and the snow accumulating on the track. The squall stopped not long after the decision, but results from the first run only stood as the final standings.

“It’s kind of disappointing,” Pikus-Pace said, “but we have to know it comes with the territory.”

Germany’s Anja Huber won the women’s race, with three Canadians in the top five. Latvia’s Martins Dukurs won the men’s race by a massive margin of 0.52 seconds ahead of Germany’s Sandro Stielicke, with Lund the top American in much milder morning conditions.

“My hamstring held up well today, actually, which is a good sign,” he said. “I needed that. Mentally, it’s been hard. I’ve been very cautious, just trying to do everything I can to get ready for the World Cup season.”

Both Lund and Pikus-Pace are former World Cup champions trying to finally reach the Olympics.

Lund qualified for the 2006 Turin Games, but was sent home after testing positive for a banned drug that was in his hair-restoration formula. Pikus-Pace missed out after suffering a broken leg when she was hit by a runaway bobsled.

And though she has raced well recently in training and trials on the new sled her husband built, Pikus-Pace found more rotten luck this week — spending time in the hospital with a gallstone attack that sapped her strength. She hopes to find better form when the World Cup season stops next weekend in Lake Placid, N.Y.

Click here for the complete article.

Not to delay… but just scroll down a bit if you’re impatient to find out my latest pin contest winner!  However… I found out some exciting and wonderful news today that I cannot wait to share!!  It is about the Mascot’s birthday!!  Now… their birthday is officially on November 27th, however we’ll be having their party on Saturday, November 28th in the Olympic Superstore!!  I have an unofficial list of events, so you shouldn’t hold me to any of it… but… it’s really great so far and I’m beside myself (and probably even beside other people!) with excitement!!

Yes, Miga, Quatchi and Sumi will be celebrating their 2nd birthday in store!!

So what’s happening??  Well, of course the Mascots will be in store (when I know their appearance times I’ll let you know… and I seriously need a picture taken of me with them this time around!!!), there will also be face painting (am I allowed to do this at work?),  a dj, CAKE (I like cake!!), and, wait for it… athletes… including… oh my gosh… I’ll need a box of kleenex ’cause I’m so excited that I’ll cry like mad!… Kurt Browning!!!!  Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!!!  I jumped and jumped and made crazy noises when I found out!  (Yes, I do that.)  And oh my gosh!!  It’s Kurt Browning!!  And the Mascots!!  And cake!!  I don’t really think it gets better than that!  Ok, maybe just a little bit… I have heard that there will be give-aways that day, but I’m not sure what they will be yet, nor when… so I will be sure to let you all know this information as soon as I get it!!  But seriously!!  Kurt Browning!!  I used to hate skating (stupid toe picks!) but  I have always loved Kurt Browning!

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OK, I’m calming myself, but time for you to get even more excited!!  Now my Mascot Birthday Pin winner!!!  (Drum roll please!!!)  And the winner is Sandy(wps1015)!!  Thanks so much for entering Sandy!  Email me at 2010vanfan@gmail.com with your address so that I may send you your prize, or if you’re in the Vancouver area, let me know if you’d like to stop by the Olympic Superstore to pick up your exceptionally cute pin!!  You’re not Sandy?  Don’t fret!  I seem to be unable to give only one pin away lately!  I added Kate T’s name to the draw, since she so kindly helped me get my map online and available to everyone and she is the second name I drew!!  So Kate T, I have a Petro-Canada Olympic Pin for you (just got them the other night from  John, a lovely Petro-Canada employee!).  And another!  Just for fun!  Henry!  For his entry that included the sports equipment in Mukmuk’s burrow (you’re all more clever than I, I saw the hockey stick and snowboard, but there was also the jersey and the curling rock!!)!  A Royal Bank Olympic pin for you Henry!  Yay!!  Thanks to everyone that entered!!  You all curling rock!  (Yes, lame puns… it’s getting late at night ).  Same deal for Kate T and Henry as for Sandy, stop by and see me in the Olympic Superstore to get your pin (just let me know first so I bring it with me) or email me your address at 2010vanfan@gmail.com to get your pin mailed to you!  Congrats and thanks-merci for reading and sharing!!

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And of course… winners also mean that I am contest-free, and I can’t have that!  So, while I don’t have one in hand quite yet… I am assuming I’ll be able to get at least one Coca-Cola 90-days-to-go pins on  Saturday, November 14th, and that is what you could win!  This is a very quick contest… I will draw the winner’s name on Sunday evening (November 15th)… but to enter, you need to get someone you know (or don’t know if you’re particularly cunning and devious) to post a comment answering this question: What sort of creature is Quatchi? And get them to include your name! The names posted in the comments with the answer will be entered to win this pin!  I’ve heard that this pin is very limited, and I’m banking on my being there early in the morning to work as my odds of getting one to give away!  And I did manage to get one of the Coca-Cola Torch pins so I’m very hopeful about this new one!

Very cool Coca-Cola Torch Relay Pin with Quatchi!! I've not been particularly convinced of the Coca-Cola pins before I saw this one!

And… on a Coca-Cola note… I had better link to the Open Happiness song, or Herb, my co-worker, and self-proclaimed “Herb of the Happiness Cafe” fanatic (aka ‘Herbalicious’ or ‘24 Herbs and spices’), will likely beat me with a Coke bottle (ok, that’s an exaggeration, he’d never use a ‘happy’ Coke bottle ).  So here it is!  It is very happy and I like that in a song.

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And speaking of happy!!!  Wow, did our athletes ever do well in Skeleton today!  Especially the women!  Amy Gough got the silver medal in the first World Cup Skeleton race of the season in Park City, Utah!!  Followed closely (only one one-hundreth of a second back) by Mellisa Hollingsworth for the bronze!!  And then by Michelle Kelly in fifth!!  The men did very well also, coming: Jeff Pain 6th, Jon Montgomery 9th and Mike Douglas 15th!  Wow!!  Go Skeleton Team!!  Oh, and if you’re interested in Skeleton, read this article from CTV about how hockey and Canadians changed Skeleton!  I really loved this article!  I had no idea that Canadians revolutionized Skeleton, let alone were devious and sneaky about when to expose their new technique!  Eh! O! Canada Go!