There was a time in my life when I was a great fan of the night sky, the stars, the fantastic view and the mysteries of the far off corners of this Universe. I used to wake all night during those vacations that I had when I would make maps of he stars and I would read and try to know more and more about them…I loved them, I collected every possible data about them and I romanced the whole concept of black holes, quasars, nebulas and other such beautiful phenomena occuring out there….I now realize that by doing all this I felt a sense of uniqueness, a sense of individuality like none other! I felt that I was different and that I can be the happiest alone, in my world and that is very much true….even today that is the one thing that has not changed about me….I am the happiest alone, I am the best when I am alone….I discover and identify with my inner core better when I am alone…This loneliness unites me so deeply with the calm and silence in the far off corners of the Universe……I feel in one with Infinity…..I feel inside me a silence that is so profound that I can Live with it Forever!!

Voici un extrait crayonné de la page 21 de Mercredi sous la Neige qui sera publiée Mercredi prochain.

Cette semaine verra le retour de notre héros originel et de nouveaux défis pour cette planche:

- Un personnage qui trempe dans l’eau en faisant la planche et donc une étude de l’immersion d’un corps dans le liquide.

- Une nouvelle mise en page, notamment concernant les phylactères et les cadres de voix off.

- Et surtout, l’utilisation d’un nouvel outil !

Je tiens à vous remercier, mes lecteurs, pour votre soutien et vos avis qui me permettent d’avancer et de me renouveler, et j’en profite pour remercier Fich et Wandrille pour leurs conseils techniques.

NEPAL. Pokhara. Woman waking on water. ⓒ Julie Mayfeng

Wow, so everybody should take a  Non-Violent Communication course.  (Oh, I found out about the whole violence connection, it comes from the thinking that when we frame requests negatively, we’re on the very edge of justifying violence, example was a school principal is asked what his request is to ease his feeling of frustration with broken windows, triggered by his need for safety and he says, “they need to stop breaking windows” and NVC guy replies, “Well that’s easy enough, we just have to kill all the students”  Extreme, but a powerful example of how easy it becomes to justify violent means to satisfy our needs without empathy or a recognition that they are our needs and not up to someone else to fulfill.)  Just incredible stuff.

Which is wonderfully appreciated on today of all days because I’m feeling rather rough around the edges after last night’s festivities.  Ginette did not disappoint with her beautiful array of delicious nibblies and booze-filled punch.  And, as always, the company was extraordinary, very interesting and fun.  We had a fantastic time.

I’m off to North Bay/Timmins/Sudbury on Tuesday for an 11 day whirlwind tour of the great white (is it white yet?) North.  I’m strangely looking really forward to it.  I mean, no surprise that I’m looking forward to the Timmins part of things, obviously, but even my time in North Bay & Sudbury…the solace of a quiet (read: puppy free) hotel room, the curling up at the end of a long day with a book or winding down with a nice, bubbly bath.  The long, uninterrupted stretches of driving time when I can just enjoy my music, new and old favourites.  I just need so much more care right now than I’m ever able to give myself, I don’t know, it might be a good thing to have forced on me for a while.

Nearly forgot to mention that I have my first formal encounter with the law tomorrow, you know, outside of the car crashing without a license incident of ‘95.  I’m actually heading to court to defend the fact that I was driving with a Nova Scotia license well -past the legal grace period.  I don’t have a legal leg to stand on, really, but I’m going through the motions anyways to see if I can at least get the whopper of a fine reduced.  It’s not sitting well with me though, I don’t tend to respond the way I should in the presence of authority.  Here’s hoping this whole endeavour isn’t one long and painful shot to the foot and that the chip labeled “authority” on my shoulder doesn’t crack my respectful citizen veneer badly enough to cause more serious consequences.

Here’s a recommendation I wholeheartedly endorse: find a puppy and start howling until he joins in with you, there’s something wonderfully “Where the Wild Things Are” about it and I promise it’ll make you feel a little lighter, if only for a moment.

Description

Are you alone during holiday seasons? Turn around and embrace the solitude of silence.

Please click on the link below to read the article!

Solitude Can be Soothing for The Soul | Socyberty.

Thanks for the comments already folks, sometimes I do not respond, but I love all the supportive feedback, Thank you. The comments are being read.

This article is being sent to the inspiration who helped me write it.

Check out Cole Rise.  I think his images are magical

Here is another shot taken at The Grotto on Friday.   It was a nice place to be while the world frantically shopped.

• Really great night tonight
• Love all the energy that is in our church
• I can remember when no one would clap or cheer and now it is part of our culture
• Awesome
• It was great having Ben and Austin with us tonight
• Love their hearts for churches in Tucson
• Loved Ben’s challenge tonight, let’s make it happen Revolution
• Do you know how we reach our city? One person at a time
• I had a pastor ask me this week, “Do you know how your church can double in one week?”
• The answer?
• If everyone at Revolution brought someone next week
• Came across this today about how a church should treat a pastor’s wife. So grateful for Revolution and the elder team who treat Katie in unbelievable ways
• We are having a special creative team meeting this week to plan atmosphere, props, videos, songs and other things for our series we are starting January 9th
• I keep telling you, Revolution, we have seen nothing yet
• In 2009, we saw God triple our church, just wait for 2010
• Planning to get away on Wednesday for a day of silence and solitude
• I have fallen behind on this and need to get back into this being a regular practice
• Would appreciate your prayers on Wednesday as I get alone with God and my moleskine
• Just picked up the new Dashboard Confessional this week, does not disapoint
• Wow
• We started Advent tonight
• We’ve never done this as a church, but I think it is going to be a cool thing this Christmas to pause and remember Jesus
• Love how Robert Webber describes Advent, “The inbreaking of God into our world”
• Totally sums up Christmas
• I got to do a wedding this past Sunday, love being a part of that part of people’s lives
• It is a funny reminder to me everytime I hang out with the groom right before the ceremony and how nervous they are
• So far, I think I was worse than anybody I’ve hung out with
• Spent most of this week working on the study guide for the series we are starting January 9th
• I cannot begin to tell you how excited I am for the next few months at Revolution and what God is going to do
• I am loving hearing the stories of how God is working through the tithing challenge and through the Revolution fast this past week
• Love when people take steps in their journey and they see how God works
• Never gets old
• I need a huge win in one of my fantasy leagues tomorrow to stay in the playoff hunt, I’m playing Paul
• This past week, Katie and I got to connect with another pastor and his wife
• Pastors need other pastors, it is one of the ways to have longevity
• Looking forward to tomorrow
• Hanging out with Katie and the kids, then football with some friends
• That’s what I call a Sabbath

Seeing the Depths of Night

repost from…. quite a while ago…..  : )

Un regard fuyant, la tête baissée, des pas, rapides, cadencés, sur un trottoir sale.
Des sourires perdus, automatiques, absents.
Des petits vieux qui trottinent au milieu de la foule, des petits vieux qui s’éteignent, qui parlent, qui ne sont pas entendus.
Des enfants accrochés par la main d’un parent pressé, des voitures, encore, toujours, trop, conserves, petites boîtes colorées.
Des silences au milieu des vacarmes.
Des gens, étranges, qui sourient, qui parlent, du dialogue insupportable, du bonheur incapable.
Des gens assis ou debout, des transports d’individus en commun.
Petites âmes endormies, aveugles et sourdes.
Du soleil fade dans des morceaux de ciel, des volets fermés sur des vies, des volets ouverts sur des vides.
Des tables, des chaises, ensembles pour mieux être séparés, des terrasses de café, un café en terrasse, un sucre et des gens qui passent.
Un cri, des larmes, qui volent, survolent les consciences.
Des jours, des nuits, des vies.
Des gens.
Nous. Gros mot.
Toi. Moi. Eux. Et le reste.

I just tried writing poetry. Maybe I am too critical or hard on myself, but I don’t think I have the gift for poetry.

I think I should just express myself in sentence form and not try to write it in E.E. Cumming’s-verse.

Here Goes:

Fucking Thankgsgiving. I visited my families in Austin and Houston. I was in Austin for a day and a half, and I couldn’t stand it. My dad got drunk, my grandmother gave me the “I will pray for you because you don’t believe in Jesus” talk, my little cousin went through my purse, and it was just generally awkward and I cried a few times. I felt so much anticipation in seeing them. And then once everything fell through, I was so disappointed and embarassed and hurt. And I was like “fuck my fucking family”. And then the nice Sarah in me reminded me that it was Thanksgiving and that I should be thankful I even have a family. Which I am. I am totally accepting for WHO THEY ARE AS HUMAN BEINGS. But they are not to me. So I was like, fuck Austin, I’m going to Houston to the side of my family that accepts me.

So here I am in Houston. I thought I missed this place. I only miss this place when I have money to buy shit from the stores that they have here that they don’t have in College Station. Lets make a note here that I am going to make it apart of my New Year’s resolution that I am going to be less materialistic. Anyway, I realized now that I’m here that I don’t miss this place at all. I fucking LOVE my life in College Station, I love being on my “own”. I love my life separate from my family’s lives. I have enjoyed the past few months on my own.

The situation between my brother and his girlfriend is fucked. But my niece is adorable. And I love her so much already, I can’t wait until she and I can have conversations.

Usually when bad things happen, you forget the good.

Lots of great things have happened. I met my niece, went to see FANTASTIC MR.FOX (its cussing great), hung out with Mike a lot, Claire and her brother got to meet my niece, had lunch with them, got my oil changed and car cleaned, talked to my mom’s exhusband who lives across the street from my grandparents (weird!), hung out with Mimi and Papa, and drove around a lot (which I really love driving).

I just really feel like my life is no longer here. I have no place here anymore. I think its best for me to live my own life separately, because I’ve gotten hurt so many times when I try to reach out to my family…So. I’m ready for me.

The Holidays fuck with people. I’d like to spend a year without celebrating the holidays in a different culture, just to see what life would really be like outside…

This is a good place to stop. Night.

Here's a recluse/hikikomori survey I've created using PollDaddy:

Click here to take the survey.

Posted via email from HikiCulture – A Forum for Reclusive People (and Hikikomori) {hikiculture.com site blog}

Le titre de cette article est surtout donner par rapport au livre du même nom, de Anthony storr.

Quoique j’hume rien fait pour passer au dessus de cette solitude, je ne regrette rien, L’homme en lui même peux ce passer de beaucoup de choses quand il fini par s’en accommoder on ne ressent plus ce sentiment que l’on avait avant .

Tout disparait pour enfin être tranquille  pourquoi ce combler de choses inutile telle que les animaux ou encore nos semblable ? je pense que l’on arrive mieux a réfléchir en étant seul dans les deux sens du terme autant définitivement que temporairement  . La solitude nourri l’imagination, la créativité et nous remet des idée en tête qui sont aussi simple que n’importe que eau claire.

La plupart des personnes essaye de rentrer dans le moule que la société leurs impose mentalement ; trouver un homme ou une femme , avoir des enfants , s’endetter sur 30 ans pour avoir une maison bloquer au fond d’une rue est enfin etre a la retraite, pour profiter de 4 ou 5 ans de votre pension pour mourir en ayant nul essayer de chercher quelque choses qui vous donnerais l’impression ou plutôt la sensation que votre vie a été amélioré ; que VOUS  pendant quelque instant est percée un bout de la vie et en avoir découvert son sens .

Merci,

Vinc

Yesterday was the first time I have spent a major holiday by myself and I wasn’t sure how I would feel. The holiday is a time for families getting together and being grateful. I enjoyed the solitude, not having to rush anywhere , listening to the same repetitive tired old conversations that happen when families get together.

I grew to hate the holiday dinners growing up, there was a lot of stress in my family around the holiday times when e got together. When I was introduced to my wifes family I enjoyed them, because they actually had fun and laughed and everything seemed so serious in the home I grew.

Someone told me as we grow up we have the opportunity to create a new family for ourselves.

I want to let you people know of a great board that is somewhat similar to HikiCulture; the board is called A Lonely Life.

I don't think that the people at ALonelyLife are quite as reclusive as the people on HikiCulture, but it's still a pretty similar board.

Posted via email from HikiCulture – A Forum for Reclusive People (and Hikikomori) {hikiculture.com site blog}

Click on this text to go to poll.

Posted via email from HikiCulture – A Forum for Reclusive People (and Hikikomori) {hikiculture.com site blog}

It’s mind boggling how much can change in a year.

Last Thanksgiving, I returned home from having dinner with family, pulled my car into the garage and closed the door behind me. But then I sat there, in that closed space, with the car engine running. Just for a minute. Or two. Just long enough to scare myself.

I remember that night now and am grateful that, even in the midst of debilitating despair, I had more sense than to do something so selfish and so foolish. Twelve months later, I sit here and marvel at all I have to be thankful for. Life is good.

I’m grateful, of course, for my creature comforts. I have a warm bed to sleep in at night and a refrigerator full of food. But, mostly, I’m thankful for less tangible blessings.

I’m thankful for the simplicity of my life. Because it has been through the process of scaling back on entanglements and obligations and possessions that I’ve found much-needed peace of mind.

And, if my new life in the desert has been surprisingly full, I have new friendships and this great site to be thankful for. I’m grateful, too, for the small pleasures that enrich my daily life here: early morning hikes and afternoon walks, morning coffee, the public library, old books and new music and classic movies in technicolor. And then there is my camera. It’s a bit beyond me, I have so much to learn, and yet it has become my most prized possession and, in many ways, my salvation.

I’m thankful that, although I am on my own, I am not unloved. I feel fortunate that my mother is living and that we’re close. I’m grateful for my new baby niece and to my brother for letting me back into his life just in time to be an auntie. I’m thankful to still have with me my challenging, smart, cranky old cat, a divine feline and the most loving of companions these past 16 years.

And, in spite of the loss that brought me to my knees not too long ago, I am grateful for my dear friend, my love, who, in his absence, has grown to be a better man. I’m thankful that we remain connected and for the knowledge that, yes, he does have real feeling for me still, something I could never quite be sure of when he was physically present in my life. I’ll even try and be thankful for this longing I feel because it lets me know I’m alive and still capable of loving another person whole-heartedly.

This Thanksgiving, I am grateful for a dawning spiritual awareness and for a rich inner life that bears little resemblance to my old one. I’m content these days, optimistic and hopeful. And, the truth is, I’ve been feeling a little restless lately. Who knows where I may have landed by this time next year?

Happy Thanksgiving!

A lone ranger walking the path, slowly, taking long gaps between each step at Primrose Hill, London.

Fire…

Motto:

* Învaţă să priveşti fără imaginaţie, să asculţi fără distorsiuni, asta-i tot. Încetează să mai atribui nume şi forme la ceea ce este în esenţă fără nume şi formă, realizează că fiecare modalitate de percepţie este subiectivă, că ceea ce este văzut sau auzit, pipăit sau mirosit, simţit sau gândit, aşteptat sau imaginat, este în minte şi nu în realitate. *   ( Nisargadatta Maharaj )

*******

Solitude…

s-au frânt tăcerile-mi de rouă catifea,

strivindu-se de colţii hâzi ai unei rime…

sărutul umbrei s-a prelins pe o mărgea

doinindu-se a toamnei taină pentru, nimeni…

Sibilla

Şi dacă-aş îndrăzni să te cuprind  sărut, în chihlimbarul dorului baladă… Oare-ai putea să te abandonezi cum vânt, să-mi răvăşeşti mirările, dar, să-ţi rămân întreagă ?… ( Sibilla )

Stai… să-ţi mai spun de… roşu şi de-ţi fură, * ispita * dor şi nu observi, cu lipsa-ţi de*  măsură *…  Sau nu, te du. Te du acum, m-ai intristat… de vei mai reveni, cândva… nu vreau să ştiu nimic, te iartă, rogu-te, de-ai mai putea… Privesc, frunzişu-ţi frământându-se, mă minunez… nu eşti mesteacănul ce strâmb stătea, în cuget însă totdeauna drept… Să fie astfel, sau mă-nşel… balade ce ne leagă aripi de demult, rămâne-vor străjeri, arc peste hule dacă eşti, vei reuşi să redevi la fel… se cheamă că pe mine sau ispita treci prin rug… Te taci! Mă tac şi eu…  cum toamnele ce peste noi se curg, se curg…  Nu vreau să-aud, pricepi? Nici elegia lacrimei ce-am devenit n-o mai ascult… din stâncă de m-oi mai zvâcni arar, doar tu vei ştii că-s eu, o ciută-n cale de-ţi tresar… Acum, sunt numai micul fulg de-amurg…  ( fire… – Sibilla )

*******

Nimic nu e… întâmplător din câte par să se întâmple, nici rândurile aşezate Scări, nu dor, cum ignoranţa celui ce să urce vrea… neînfruntându-şi patimi mai întâi şi-ajunge, să nu mai ştie care treaptă e a sa şi care-l ispiteşte-n mreje, piază rea … doineşte dar, vocalele-a blândeţe, dă-i şansei de-a-ţi rămâne ţie, Tu… fii Înnţelept şi şezi deoparte de-ale multora * reţele * sau… * poveţe *…   ( Sibilla )

* Nu există fericire de care să-ţi aminteşti fără tristeţe. *   ( Octavian Paler )

* Nu proştii au făcut ca inteligenţa să aibă ieşire la zâmbet. *   ( Vasile Ghica )

* Voinţa de a crede că viaţa e un miracol ne permite să asistăm la miracole, nu aşa-numitele “ritualuri secrete” sau “ordine iniţiatice”. Hotărârea omului de a-şi împlini destinul îl face pe om să fie adevărat, nu teoriile pe care el le dezvoltă pe seama misterului existenţei. *   ( Paulo Coelho )

* Destinul nostru este harta gândită de Dumnezeu înainte de a ne naşte, hartă concepută cu libertatea necesară de a ne descurca pe ea. *   ( Viorel Muha )

* Dacă nu găseşti nicio cale de ieşire, încearcă privind în Sus *….    ( anonimus )

Sibilla

imagini preluate de pe google.ro

citate preluate de pe www.citapedia.ro

]]>