We had a happy and sunny week here, in fact we are expecting temperatures in the 90′s F this weekend. Spot had another chemo treatment this Wednesday, and so far she seems to be handling this one like a champ. The heavy-duty drug Doxorubicin is on deck for this Wednesday; she’s scheduled for it every 5 weeks. The Doxo is the roughest of all of her chemo drugs, so if you can send her good thoughts this week, she’ll appreciate them!

It’s been a million years since I posted running and work-out songs… But I recently traded in my cookie spatula for my running shoes, so look for some songs and rambling running thoughts later this week. No clear theme here, but Guap’s mention of Abba’s “Dancing Queen” this week got me thinking about dancing, and the sunny skies have me thinking about flowers and warmer days. Thanks for dropping by, I wish you all a sunny week! ~ Christy

~~~

~ “I Won’t Dance” performed by Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong. Available on “Ella and Louis Again“. Video HERE.

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Alternate song: “I Don’t Feel Like Dancing” performed by Scissor Sisters from “Ta Dah“, video link HERE.

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“After all, Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did. She just did it backwards and in high heels.” ~ Ann Richards

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“And those who were seen dancing, were thought to be crazy, by those who could not hear the music.” ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

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“Modern party-dance is simply writhing to suggestive music. It is ridiculous, silly to watch and excruciatingly embarrassing to perform. It is ridiculous, and yet absolutely everyone does it, so that it is the person who does not want to do the ridiculous thing who feels out of place and uncomfortable and self-conscious… in a word, ridiculous. Right out of Kafka: the person who does not want to do the ridiculous thing is the person who is ridiculous… Modern party-dance is an evil thing.” ~ David Foster Wallace, The Broom of the System

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“Dance, when you’re broken open. Dance, if you’ve torn the bandage off. Dance in the middle of the fighting. Dance in your blood. Dance when you’re perfectly free.” ~ Rumi

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“When people think of holidays
They think of cold weather
“Let’s spend this frozen wonderland together”

Not me, I’m into warmer days
Don’t wanna hear bout your winter wonderland
I am into, I’m into warmer days…”

~ Blues Traveler, “Warmer Days” <– click to listen, on album “Blues Traveler“

*

“Everyone must leave something behind when he dies, my grandfather said. A child or a book or a painting or a house or a wall built or a pair of shoes made. Or a garden planted. Something your hand touched some way so your soul has somewhere to go when you die, and when people look at that tree or that flower you planted, you’re there.

It doesn’t matter what you do, he said, so long as you change something from the way it was before you touched it into something that’s like you after you take your hands away. The difference between the man who just cuts lawns and a real gardener is in the touching, he said. The lawn-cutter might just as well not have been there at all; the gardener will be there a lifetime.” ~ Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451

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“You can cut all the flowers but you cannot keep Spring from coming.” ~ Pablo Neruda

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“A man’s mind may be likened to a garden, which may be intelligently cultivated or allowed to run wild; but whether cultivated or neglected, it must, and will, bring forth. If no useful seeds are put into it, then an abundance of useless weed seeds will fall therein, and will continue to produce their kind.” ~ James Allen, As a Man Thinketh

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“I’m an introvert… I love being by myself, love being outdoors, love taking a long walk with my dogs and looking at the trees, flowers, the sky.” ~ Audrey Hepburn

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“If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change.” ~ The Buddha

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“Flowers have an expression of countenance as much as men or animals. Some seem to smile; some have a sad expression; some are pensive and diffident; others again are plain, honest and upright, like the broad-faced sunflower and the hollyhock.” ~ Henry Ward Beecher

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SONNET: DAFFODILS by Gavin Ewart

Wordsworth really loved daffodils. He said they were flashers.
Certainly they must be the most exhibitionistic flowers
there are.
trumpeting their presence in yellow—by far the most
visible colour.
I grant that after a long hard winter
it’s warming to see snow-drops and crocuses in that iron earth
and the very first daffodils (what a cliché) seem a
resurrection,
something it even seems appropriate to make a fuss about.
They look so perfect, though a bit self-conscious.

After a week or two, however, when Spring is established,
and everywhere you look there are oceans of daffodils
as arrogant as pop stars, they begin to seem ordinary.
You take them for granted. Like a love affair fading
they shrivel and go crinkly, papery and tired.
The Spring too (teenagers witness) has its own kind of
boredom.

“Sonnet: Daffodils” by Gavin Ewart, from Or Where a Young Penguin Lies Screaming. © Little Hampton books, 1978.

*** See Wordsworth’s poem “Daffodils” HERE

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LONELY HARVEST by Margaret S. Mullins

As a child, my father helped me dig
a square of dense red clay, mark off rows
where zinnias would grow,
and radishes and tender spinach leaves.
He’d stand with me each night
as daylight drained away
to talk about our crops leaning on his hoe
as I would practice leaning so on mine.

Years later now in my big garden plot,
the soggy remnant stems of plants
flopped over several months ago,
the ground is cold, the berries gone,
the stakes like hungry sentries
stand guarding empty graves. And still
I hear his voice asking what I think
would best be planted once the weather warms.

“Lonely Harvest” by Margaret S. Mullins, from Family Constellation. © Finishing Line Press, 2012

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And for Brigitte, who is learning Italian…

LEARNING ITALIAN SLOWLY by David Shumate

I learn three words each day. It’s been seven months now and
perhaps I could carry on a conversation with a Sicilian child. If she
spoke slowly. In present tense. And only about pencils and dogs
and cheese. Sometimes I feel my new Italian self growing inside
me. He’s a little man who gesticulates as he speaks. He rides his
bicycle to the market to buy eggplant, anise, and porcini. Then
delivers them to his elderly mother. In the afternoon he plays
bocce with the older men. The children mimic the way he
whispers to himself. The grimaces he makes with his face. When
the moon comes out he slicks back his hair and sings beneath the
window of the woman he loves. What a sight he is. Down on one
knee. His arms outstretched. So willing to make a fool of himself.
Over and over again.

“Learning Italian Slowly” by David Shumate, from The Floating Bridge. © University of Pittsburgh Press, 2008

~~~

A baby girl and her mom

We debated names for several days. My husband kept shooting down my ideas. I mean, come on, don’t you think Minnie and Pearl are great donkey names? And I thought Kitty and Pony were cute names too–Kitty, or even Miss Kitty, because when the momma donkey hee-haws, she sounds just like my cat when he is hacking up a hairball, and Pony because, hey, I’ve always wanted a Pony and she could be My Little Pony. George and Eliot, Sunny and Cher, Marsha and Mellow… nope, nope, nope.

We opted for names based more on physical descriptions: Cocoa and Ginger. But they fit their personalities too– Cocoa is a bit diva-ish and reserved like Coco Chanel and little Ginger loves to run and jump and prance like Ginger Rogers. (Char, you can tell your Ginger about our new Ginger!)

Cocoa… a little shy.

Ginger… a natural entertainer.

I love Ginger’s eyes. Isn’t she gorgeous?

The donkeys’ previous owner was moving out-of-state, and had left these two and others to fend for themselves until new homes could be found. They haven’t really been socialized with people or other animals, but as you can see, they are fitting in with the herd quite nicely.

The donkeys have fit right in with our laid back herd.

A quick and funny story about how the universe works… I don’t know much about donkeys–I’ve never had one. The day or two after we bring the donkeys home, Carolyn Hughes over at The Hurt Healer blog awarded me The Versatile Blogger Award (thanks, Carolyn!). Well guess who had nominated her for the award, so that she could pass it along to me? None other than Melody at The Donkey Whisperer Blog! An actual donkey whisperer appears right after I rescue these donkeys, seriously how crazy is that?

Oddly enough, a few folks around here call me The Cow Whisperer (odd to me, because this city girl has never had cows until a couple of years ago.) I have no idea why they call me that– it’s not like I hand-feed or pet them or anything.

Okay, so maybe I do. Occasionally.

And yep, that’s Cocoa the Donkey behind the cow. The donkeys learned right away what dinner time was all about. I haven’t had them take food out of my hand yet, but it’s only a matter of time. They’ve come inches away before chickening out at the last second, and they’ve even followed me around–from a distance–on a couple of my outdoor runs.

First trick? Teaching Ginger to sing I’m a Believer. Why not? If sheep can sing Taylor Swift, surely a donkey can sing The Monkees. Stranger things have happened.

(Link to above Shrek video for my email subscribers HERE.)

I saw the movie Silver Linings Playbook this week–it was phenomenal! Jennifer Lawrence was very deserving of her Oscar. Of course, the book was still better, but I really really loved the movie. Go see it (but read the book first–it’s a quick read)! Silver Linings Playbook helped inspire this week’s theme… Enjoy, and have a wonderful week!

P.S.- Spot had a happy, healthy and energetic week (and so did I)! She had her second chemo treatment and seems to be managing very well. Thanks everyone for the thoughts, prayers and healing energy. Oh, we also have two new additions to our “zoo”! I can’t wait to introduce you to them later this week! 

~~~

~ Ray Lamontagne, “Crazy”, available HERE, video link HERE. (Ray does a totally revamped cover version of Gnarls Barkley’s original, HERE. I also love this live cover by Cat Power HERE–she really draws the crazy out with trumpets and a chorus change “Maybe I’m crazy, I don’t give a f*ck…”)

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Alternate song: “Crazy, Crazy Nights” performed by KISS from “Crazy Nights“, video link HERE

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“Life is hard, and children have to be told how hard life can be… So they will be sympathetic to others. So they will understand that some people have it harder than they do and that a trip through this world can be a wildly different experience, depending on what chemicals are raging through one’s mind.”  ~ Matthew Quick, The Silver Linings Playbook

“She looks sad. She looks angry. She looks different from everyone else I know—she cannot put on that happy face others wear when they know they are being watched. She doesn’t put on a face for me, which makes me trust her somehow.” ~ Matthew Quick, The Silver Linings Playbook

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“The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they’re ok, then it’s you.” ~ Rita Mae Brown

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“THE EDGE, there is no honest way to explain it because the only people who really know where it is are the ones who have gone over.” ~ Hunter S. Thompson

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“Men have called me mad; but the question is not yet settled, whether madness is or is not the loftiest intelligence– whether much that is glorious– whether all that is profound– does not spring from disease of thought– from moods of mind exalted at the expense of the general intellect.” ~ Edgar Allan Poe, Complete Tales and Poems

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“And when your sorrow is comforted (time soothes all sorrows) you will be content that you have known me. You will always be my friend. You will want to laugh with me. And you will sometimes open your window, so, for that pleasure. And your friends will be properly astonished to see you laughing as you look up at the sky! Then you will say to them, ‘Yes, the stars always make me laugh!’ And they will think you are crazy. It will be a very shabby trick that I shall have played on you…” ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

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“Was I ever crazy? Maybe. Or maybe life is… Crazy isn’t being broken or swallowing a dark secret. It’s you or me amplified. If you ever told a lie and enjoyed it. If you ever wished you could be a child forever. They were not perfect, but they were my friends.” ~ Susanna Kaysen, Girl, Interrupted

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“Taking crazy things seriously is a serious waste of time.” ~ Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore

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“Here’s what I think, Mr. Wind-Up Bird,” said May Kasahara. “Everybody’s born with some different thing at the core of their existence. And that thing, whatever it is, becomes like a heat source that runs each person from the inside. I have one too, of course. Like everybody else. But sometimes it gets out of hand. It swells or shrinks inside me, and it shakes me up. What I’d really like to do is find a way to communicate that feeling to another person. But I can’t seem to do it. They just don’t get it. Of course, the problem could be that I’m not explaining it very well, but I think it’s because they’re not listening very well. They pretend to be listening, but they’re not, really. So I get worked up sometimes, and I do some crazy things.” ~ Haruki Murakami, The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle

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“I’d like to repeat the advice that I gave you before, in that I think you really should make a radical change in your lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which you may previously never have thought of doing, or been too hesitant to attempt. So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.

If you want to get more out of life, Ron, you must lose your inclination for monotonous security and adopt a helter-skelter style of life that will at first appear to you to be crazy. But once you become accustomed to such a life you will see its full meaning and its incredible beauty. And so, Ron, in short, get out of Salton City and hit the Road. I guarantee you will be very glad you did. But I fear that you will ignore my advice. You think that I am stubborn, but you are even more stubborn than me. You had a wonderful chance on your drive back to see one of the greatest sights on earth, the Grand Canyon, something every American should see at least once in his life. But for some reason incomprehensible to me you wanted nothing but to bolt for home as quickly as possible, right back to the same situation which you see day after day after day. I fear you will follow this same inclination in the future and thus fail to discover all the wonderful things that God has placed around us to discover.

Don’t settle down and sit in one place. Move around, be nomadic, make each day a new horizon. You are still going to live a long time, Ron, and it would be a shame if you did not take the opportunity to revolutionize your life and move into an entirely new realm of experience.

You are wrong if you think Joy emanates only or principally from human relationships. God has placed it all around us. It is in everything and anything we might experience. We just have to have the courage to turn against our habitual lifestyle and engage in unconventional living.

My point is that you do not need me or anyone else around to bring this new kind of light in your life. It is simply waiting out there for you to grasp it, and all you have to do is reach for it. The only person you are fighting is yourself and your stubbornness to engage in new circumstances.” ~ Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild

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“I’ve always been different with one foot over the line
Winding up somewhere one step ahead or behind
It ain’t been so easy but I guess I shouldn’t complain
I’ve always been crazy but it’s kept me from going insane…”

~ Waylon Jennings, “I’ve Always Been Crazy” from album “I’ve Always Been Crazy“, VIDEO

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“Matilda said, “Never do anything by halves if you want to get away with it. Be outrageous. Go the whole hog. Make sure everything you do is so completely crazy it’s unbelievable…” ~ Roald Dahl, Matilda

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“If one day I could get out of here, I would allow myself to be crazy. Everyone is indeed crazy, but the craziest are the ones who don’t know they’re crazy; they just keep repeating what others tell them to.” ~ Paulo Coelho, Veronika Decides to Die

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“You’re right. I am crazy. But you know what else? I don’t give a fuck.” ~ Tupac Shakur

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“Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.”  ~ Charles Bukowski

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LOST-

BY CHARLES BUKOWSKI

~~~

Dime por qué lloras
De felicidad
Y por qué te ahogas
Por la soledad
Di por qué me tomas, fuerte así,
mis manos, y tus pensamientos te van llevandoYo te quiero tanto
Y por qué será
Loco testarudo, no lo dudes más,
aunque en el futuro haya un muro enorme,
yo no tengo miedo, quiero enamorarme.

No me ames, porque pienses que
parezco diferente
Tú no piensas que es lo justo,
ver pasar el tiempo juntos
No me ames, que comprendo,
la mentira que sería.
Si tu amor no merezco, no me ames,
mas quédate otro día

No me ames, porque estoy perdido,
porque cambié el mundo, porque es el
destino, porque no se puede, somos un espejo,
Y tú así serías lo que yo
de mí reflejo
No me ames, para estar muriendo,
dentro de una guerra llena de
arrepentimientos, no me ames para estar
en tierra, quiero alzar el
vuelo, con
tu gran amor por el azul del cielo

(SHORT BREAK)

No sé qué decirte, esa es la verdad,
si la gente quiere, sabe lastimar
Tú y yo partiremos, ellos no se mueven,
pero en este cielo sola no me dejes

No me dejes, no me dejes, no me escuches,
si te digo “no me ames”.
No me dejes, no desarmes,
mi corazón con ese “no me ames”
No me ames, te lo ruego, mi amargura, dèjame
Sabes bien, que no puedo, que es inútil,
que siempre te amaré

No me ames, pues te haré sufrir con este
corazòn que se llenó de mil inviernos
No me ames, para así olvidarte de tus días grises, quiero que me ames
sólo por amarme
No me ames, tú y yo volaremos,
uno con el otro y seguiremos siempre juntos
Este amor es como el sol que sale tras de la tormenta
Como dos cometas en la misma estella

“Dont love me” >> “You don’t love me”

Tell me why you’re crying…
Of happiness.
And why are you drowning?
for loneliness
Tell me why you take my hands so strongly, and let your
thoughts carry you away

I love you so much
And why is that?
Crazy stubborn person, stop doubting it any longer
Even though in the future there will be a huge wall
I’m not afraid, I want to fall in love

Dont love me, because you think that
I may appear different
You dont think its right
For us to see time go by together?
Dont love me, I understand
the lie that it would be
If your love, I don;t deserve, dont love me,
just stay another day

Dont love me, because I am lost,
Because I changed the world,Because its destiny
Because it can’t be, We both are like a mirror,
And you would be my own reflection
Don’t love me, you would be dying
Within a war full of regrets,
dont love me to be on the ground, I want to take off (fly away) with your enormous love thru the blue of the sky
.

(SHORT BREAK)

I dont know what to say to you, that’s the truth
When people want to, they know how to hurt
You and I will depart, they would not move,
But in this sky dont leave me alone

Dont leave me, dont leave me, dont listen to me
If I say to you “dont love me”
Dont let me. Do not disable
my heart with that “Dont love me”
Dont love me, I’m begging you, leave me with my bitterness
You know well, that I can’t, that its useless,
That I will always love you

Dont love me,because I would make you suffer with this heart of mine
that was filled with a thousand winters.
Dont love me,so that way you can forget of your gray days.
I want you to love me, just to love me
Dont love me, you and I will fly,
With the other, and we will always be together
This love is like the sun that comes out after the storm
Like 2 comets on the same path

sing365.com

I’ve spent the last almost-three-weeks (geez, has it been that long!?) waiting for the sun to come out. It’s been rough you guys. Spot should have had three chemo treatments by now. She’s had one. After her first treatment, her white blood cell count was too low the following week to do her second treatment. The vet assured us this was normal and that we could wait until the next week to do her second treatment. But then Spot got sick with horrible stomach and digestive issues–without going into graphic detail, suffice it to say nothing would stay down or in, if we could get her to eat or drink at all. We’re not sure if it’s delayed response to the first chemo drug (Vincristine) or to the Prednisone steroids or even to a bacterial infection. We had to postpone chemo again because, as the vet informed me, “we can’t give chemo to a sick dog.” Ugh, I know, I know… But in the back of my mind I keep hearing the clock tick down, every second, tick, tick, tick, tick, keeping us away from life-extending chemo.

It’s hard to feel so helpless. I hate it. I feel myself slipping back into caregiver mode, neglecting myself and most of the world around me while I focus single-minded on my little girl’s health and care. I can control my surroundings (to a degree), but I can’t control her health, no matter how I am trying. You’d think I would have learned this with my mom’s passing, but it’s those feelings that made drinking my then, not now, go-to escape.

Instead now I’ve had a short-fuse, I’ve been arguing with my husband, I’ve been neglecting friends, I’ve been zoning out playing Bejeweled on my phone, I haven’t posted on my blog or Facebook, I’m isolating, I’ve been baking cookies and even making pies–from scratch no less! I know I have my head in the sand… I see it, I do, at least I know what I’m doing. I think those are just my coping mechanisms while I wait for the sun to come back out.

The good news is, the past few days have felt sunnier. Spot is acting like her old self and feeling much better. I’ve been sleeping better. I’ve gone for a few runs. I’m eating healthier. I’m not as foggy. I don’t feel as depressed. I’m thinking about blog topics. As I wrote to a friend, “I am cautiously optimistic.”

(And let me just say thank-you to everyone for not saying to me, “but she’s just a dog!”, because she’s not “just a dog” to me. She’s a family member, a best friend, and the closest thing to a child I am likely to ever have. If you get it, you get it; if you don’t, that’s okay–but thank you for not saying I’m crazy.)

A big thank you to my new followers; I’m really glad you found me! I usually try to stop by and comment on new followers’ blogs, but, yep, I’ve had my head in the sand. I’ll try to stop by to say hi soon.

Thank you Julie Israel at The Read Room for nominating me for The Reality Award. Julie runs a fantastic blog “for readers, writers and word-a-holics” and I love that she is sweet, funny, REAL, and a true writer’s writer. Check out her site and say hi for me!

And thank you to my friends who have emailed me to see how I’m doing. I really appreciate and love you guys.

Hey, whatdoyaknow? Is that the sun out there? It sure the heck looks like the sun to me… I guess that’s what happens when you take your head out of the sand for a few minutes to look around. You start seeing all these things you’ve missed. Including the sun.

(I love The Beatles’ original, but it’s virtually impossible to listen to Richie’s version–complete with congas!–without tapping your foot along. Love his live interpretation of this classic song. Video link to “Here Comes the Sun” by Richie Havens HERE for my email followers.)

So…. how are you? Is it sunny where you are today? I hope so. If it’s not, just remember, “it will be sunny one day.” 

When the wind blows, and the sun goes away
and the sand fall, stormy day, it’s a destroyer, this is for you
And as it pours down, the water sprinkles off my chest, its destroyer, it’s like is to ya

Whenever i do have it, do i have it, want this to face me
Whenever i do have it, do i want this thing to make me
Cause the fame, and the money, and the girl will drive you crazy
Another he said, she said, i’m thinking maybe
Just put on…

Guess i’ll put on my raincoat, my yellow raincoat
Baby it’s keeping my dry
I put on my raincoat, my yellow raincoat
You know exactly why

But as i look around, i see, when i’m thinking never, change me
Well all i gotta do, is stay meLets the rest do the work and i’ll show that i’ll be fine, be fina

When the wind blows, and the sun goes away
and the sand fall, stormy day, it’s a destroyer, this is for you
And as it pours down, the water sprinkles off my chest, its destroyer, it’s like is to ya

Whenever i do have it, do i have it, want this to face me
Whenever i do have it, do i want this thing to make me
Cause the fame, and the money, and the girl will drive you crazy
Another he said, she said, i’m thinking maybe
Just put on…

Guess i’ll put on my raincoat, my yellow raincoat
Baby it’s keeping my dry
I put on my raincoat, my yellow raincoat
You know exactly why

Turutu turutu…

Guess i’ll put on my raincoat, my yellow raincoat
Baby it’s keeping my dry
I put on my raincoat, my yellow raincoat
You know exactly why

As most of you know, Spot’s diagnosis came back as high-grade, large-cell, multi-centric lymphoma. We have opted to “get medieval on cancer’s ass” (see video below) with weekly chemo starting this Wednesday. I am immersing myself in canine cancer research and spending time with Spot, but I will try to put out the  occasional update post and inspirational weekend quotes and music post. Oh, it turns out my sugar-free January experiment may have been good practice because we will be making some big changes to Spot’s diet and nutrition (in a nutshell, sugar is bad, bad, bad for cancer patients as it feeds the cancer cells). The good news is, fat is good for cancer dogs- and bacon is full of it AND it’s sugar-free!

If bad-language doesn’t offend you, check out this video clip from Pulp Fiction… HERE… we’re pretty far from okay, but we’re going to fight!  (Link is not suitable for work or young ears due to language.)

~~~

~ Gym Class Heroes, “The Fighter”, on album “The Papercut Chronicles II“, video link HERE.

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Alternate song: “Move Along” performed by All American Rejects from “Move Along“, video link HERE

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“So, this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I’m still trying to figure out how that could be.” ~ Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

*

*

“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” ~ Maya Angelou

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“What I need is the dandelion in the spring. The bright yellow that means rebirth instead of destruction. The promise that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. That it can be good again.” ~ Suzanne Collins, Mockingjay

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“The world is indeed full of peril and in it there are many dark places. But still there is much that is fair. And though in all lands, love is now mingled with grief, it still grows, perhaps, the greater.” ~ J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings

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“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” ~ St. Francis of Assisi, The Little Flowers of St. Francis of Assisi

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“Fairy tales are more than true: not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.” ~ Neil Gaiman, Coraline

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“Sometimes I go about pitying myself
And all the while
I am being carried across the sky
By beautiful clouds”  ~ Ojibway Expression

*

“Instead of feeling bad
Be glad you got somewhere to go
Instead of feeling sad
Be happy you’re not all alone
Instead of feeling low
Get high on everything you love
Instead of wastin’ time
Feel good ’bout what you are dreaming of…

Instead of feelin’ broke
Buck up and get yourself in the black
Instead of losing hope
Touch up the things that feel out of whack
Instead of being old
Be young because you know you are
Instead of feeling cold
Let sunshine into your heart…”

~ Madeleine Peyroux, “Instead” from album “Bare Bones“, VIDEO

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“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.” ~ Henri J.M. Nouwen, The Road to Daybreak: A Spiritual Journey

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HOPE IS THE THING WITH FEATHERS-

BY EMILY DICKINSON

~~~

From

I know there’s always two sides
To every story
And I promise I will try
To keep an open mind
But there’s somethings you don’t do
Some things you don’t say
You’re close to crossing that line
You crossed that line

And I
I don’t
I don’t, I don’t, I don’t, I don’t understand
But I get it, I
Gotta take it for what it’s worth
Sometimes it be like that
Sometimes friends out grow each other

It still confuses me how that ones closest to you
Can do things to make you feel
Like the loyalty they say they have is untrue
I’ve seen money change things
I just thought we were too real to ever see it happen to us
I ain’t really want it to happen to us

I know there’s always two sides
To every story
And I promise I will try
To keep an open mind
But there’s somethings you don’t do
Some things you don’t say
You’re close to crossing that line
You crossed that line

And I
I don’t
I don’t, I don’t, I don’t, I don’t understand
But I get it, I
Gotta take it for what it’s worth
Sometimes it be like that
Sometimes friends out grow each other

There’s a season for everything
A time to break down
And a time to build
A time to weep
And a time to laugh
A time to embrace
And a time to refrain from embracing
A time to gain
And a time to lose
A time to keep silent
And a time to speak
A time to love
And a time to let haters hate

I know there’s always two sides
To every story
And I promise I will try
To keep an open mind
But there’s somethings you don’t do
Some things you don’t say
You’re close to crossing that line
You crossed that line

And I
I don’t
I don’t, I don’t, I don’t, I don’t understand
But I get it, I
Gotta take it for what it’s worth
Sometimes it be like that
Sometimes friends out grow each other.

When they send new hit for radio
Just another dance for the dancefloor
Feel it gettin in if you didn’t know
I gotta whole nooooooo
Break bread if you want to
Cause leaving you is what I wont do
Been in love with you completley
And can nobody can stop that from me

[Bridge]
A couple shots of patron
But I ain’t drinkin all alone
I gotta have you with me
Up in the V.I.P
Everything we do B.I.G
And I’ma keep it real till I D.I.P
Okay (okay)
Lets go (lets go)
I’m wit it (I’m wit it)
And you know (you know)
And you got it (you got it)
And I’m ready (ready)
Sooo reaaaaa

[Chorus]
I’m so in love with you
No lie I’m telling the truth
I’m your woman
Now baby take me away
See you in everything I do
Is when I’m so wrapped up in you
I’m your woman
Now baby take me away
Take me away
I love my baby, I love my baby
(I’m ready, so ready)
Take me away
I love my baby, I love my baby

I just wanna see you in the morning
Cuz loving you is easy as I’m dreaming
Everyday feels like a weekend
I finally found you and I’m seekin
Feels like I wanna be close to you
And do all the things that lovers do
Your love can get me higher
Cuz boy you got that fire, fireeeee

[Bridge]

[Chorus]

(Can you hear me)

When it’s a new hit for the radio
Sooo reaaaddyyy
Just another dance for the dancefloor
Throws ya hands up
I’m ready so ready
Take me away take me
I love my baby
Alright alright.

ajik motdahan
nae maeumeul
jeonhal su itge

hoooo hooo~

dasi ireona
nal gidaryeojun geudael bogo sipeo
dasi doraga
hago sipeun mal saranghamnida

meomchwobeorin geotman gatasseo
sesangi da
haengbokhaetdeon sigandeulman seuchyeoga
naegen eobseul geotman gatatdeon
kkeute seoseo
geureoke nan gidoman haesseo

jinachyeo watdeon
sarangdeureul
neukkil su itge

Hoooo~

dasi ireona
nal gidaryeojun geudael bogo sipeo
dasi doraga
hago sipeun mal saranghamnida

moreun chae sarawasseo
eolmana sojunghaesseonneunji

dasi ireona
nal gidaryeojun geudael bogo sipeo
dasi doraga
hago sipeun mal saranghamnida

eo-meo! yae jom bwara yae, museun iri isseotgillae meoril jallatdae? eung?

[YURI] eo-meo! tto yae jom borago! meoributeo balkkeutkkaji seutairi bakkwieosseo

wae geuraetdae? gunggeumhae jukgenne wae geuraetdae?

malhae bwabwa jom

[TIFFANY] Ha Ha! Let me introduce myself!

Here comes trouble! ttara hae!

o oo ye o. oo ye o

[JESSICA] neo jallasseo jeongmal!

[TAEYEON] jiga mwonde? utgyeo. neomu kotdae sen geo ani?

nabogo pyeongbeomhadanda yae.. eo~~

[JESSICA] geu namja wanjeon mame deureonna bwa !

[TAE-SICA] maldo andwae! maldo andwae!

[SEOHYUN] neomu yeppeojigo seksihae jyeosseo geu namja ttaemuniji?

mureobol ppeon haetdanikka? neo bakkun hwajangpumi mwonji

[SUNNY] sasil na, cheoeum bwasseo

sangcheo ibeun yasu gateun gipeun nun

[JESSICA] yaegiman haedo eojil haetdanikka?

[SOO – YURI] neo jallasseo jeongmal! jallasseo jeongmal!

o oo ye o. oo ye o

[TAEYEON] neo jallatda jeongmal!

o oo ye o. oo ye o

[SUNNY] neo jallasseo jeongmal!

[TIFFANY] Ayo! Stop! Let me put it down another way.

[ALL] I got a boy meotjin! I got a boy chakhan!

I got a boy handsome boy nae mam da gajyeogan

I got a boy meotjin! I got a boy chakhan!

I got a boy awesome boy wanjeon banhaenna bwa

[TAEYEON] a nae wangjanim! eonje i momeul guhareo wa jusil tengayo?

[SUNNY] hayan kkumcheoreom nal pume ana ollyeo naraga jusigetjyo?

[YOONA] na, kkamjjak! menbungiya!

geu sarameun nae min nachi gunggeumhadae.

wanjeon mame deureo mot igin cheok boyeojwodo gwaenchanheulkka?

[HYOYEON] ou! jeoldaero andoeji!

[YOONA] geuchi? geuchi?

[HYOYEON] uri, jikil geon jikija!

[YOONA] matji! matji!

[HYOYEON] geuui mameul modu gajil ttaekkaji igeon jeoldaero ijeobeoriji mallago!

o oo ye o. oo ye o

[YURI] bameul saedo mojara da da

o oo ye o. oo ye o

[SOOYOUNG] uri choego gwansimsa da da

[SEOHYUN] nae mal deureobwa geu ai neone alji?

jom eorijiman sogeun kkwak chasseo

[TIFFANY] eotteol ttaen oppacheoreom deumjikhajiman,

aegyoreul buril ttaen neomu yeppeo jukgesseo

o oo ye o. oo ye o

[YOONA] neo michyeosseo, michyeosseo

o oo ye o. oo ye o

[HYOYEON] neo michyeosseo, michyeosseo

[TIFFANY] nan jeongmal hwaga na jukgesseo

nae namjan nal yeojaro anboneun geol

[TAEYEON] magyeonhal ttaen eotteokhamyeon naega jokenni?

jilturado nage haebolkka?

soksanghae! eotteokhae! na?

[YURI] maldo an dwae! maldo an dwae!

[JESSICA] Don’t stop! Let’s bring it back to 140

[ALL] I got a boy meotjin! I got a boy chakhan!

I got a boy handsome boy nae mam da gajyeogan

I got a boy meotjin! I got a boy chakhan!

I got a boy awesome boy wanjeon banhaenna bwa

[JESSICA] eonjena nae gyeoten naepyeoni dwaejugo gwi giullyeojuneun

neo—- neo—-

[SEOHYUN] nan idaero jigeum haengbokhae jal doel geonikka

[ALL] I got a boy meotjin! I got a boy chakhan!

I got a boy handsome boy nae mam da gajyeogan

([TAEYEON] a nae wangjanim! eonje i momeul guhareo wa jusil tengayo?)

[ALL] I got a boy meotjin! I got a boy chakhan!

I got a boy awesome boy wanjeon banhaenna bwa

([SUNNY] hayan kkumcheoreom nal pume ana ollyeo naraga jusigetjyo?)

[ALL] I got a boy meotjin! I got a boy chakhan!

I got a boy handsome boy nae mam da gajyeogan

I got a boy meotjin! I got a boy chakhan!

I got a boy awesome boy wanjeon banhaenna bwa

I got a boy meotjin

A special thank you to everyone for the thoughts, prayers, hugs and support this week during my time of worry and uncertainty around my dog’s health. Her biopsy went well, though she had quite a loopy evening. Results Tuesday or Wednesday… I’ll keep you all posted as I learn more. I’m doing my best to not worry–a perfect topic for this weekend’s selection (and a helpful distraction for me to compose). A quick note on the first two songs: my mom would often sing these songs to me as a child–to this day, they still calm and ease my worried mind. As for the closing song, I discovered Bob Marley later in life, and while “Three Little Birds” may better fit the Don’t Worry theme, “No Woman, No Cry” relaxes me more when I am stressed. I mentioned to a friend that it’s impossible to be sad and listen to Bob at the same time. I hope you enjoy the songs and quotes. Thanks again for all the love! ~ Christy

~~~

“And if I ever lose my eyes
If my colours all run dry
And if I ever lose my eyes – Oh,
I won’t have to cry no more
Yes, I’m being followed by a moon shadow
Moon shadow moon shadow
Leaping and hopping on a moonshadow
Moon shadow moon shadow”

~ Cat Stevens (Yusuf), “Moonshadow”, on  album “The Very Best of Cat Stevens“, video link HERE.

*

Alternate song: “Everything’s Alright” performed by Yvonne Elliman from “Jesus Christ Superstar” original cast recording, video link HERE

“Try not to get worried, try not to turn on to
Problems that upset you, oh.
Don’t you know
Everything’s alright, yes, everything’s fine.
And we want you to sleep well tonight.
Let the world turn without you tonight.
If we try, we’ll get by, so forget all about us tonight”

*

“Worrying is carrying tomorrow’s load with today’s strength- carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time. Worrying doesn’t empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.” ~ Corrie ten Boom, Clippings from My Notebook

*

“Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen.
Keep in the sunlight.” ~ Benjamin Franklin

*

“But I can hardly sit still. I keep fidgeting, crossing one leg and then the other. I feel like I could throw off sparks, or break a window–maybe rearrange all the furniture.” ~ Raymond Carver, Where I’m Calling From: New and Selected Stories

*

“They need to worry and betray time with urgencies false and otherwise, purely anxious and whiny, their souls really won’t be at peace unless they can latch on to an established and proven worry and having once found it they assume facial expressions to fit and go with it, which is, you see, unhappiness, and all the time it all flies by them and they know it and that too worries them no end.” ~ Jack Kerouac

*

“If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it’s not fixable, then there is no help in worrying. There is no benefit in worrying whatsoever.” ~ Dalai Lama XIV

*

“Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.” ~ Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

*

“Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” ~ Matthew 6:27 and 6:34

*

“There are very few things in the mind which eat up as much energy as worry. It is one of the most difficult things not to worry about anything. Worry is experienced when things go wrong, but in relation to past happenings it is idle merely to wish that they might have been otherwise. The frozen past is what it is, and no amount of worrying is going to make it other than what it has been. But the limited ego-mind identifies itself with its past, gets entangled with it and keeps alive the pangs of frustrated desires. Thus worry continues to grow into the mental life of man until the ego-mind is burdened by the past. Worry is also experienced in relation to the future when this future is expected to be disagreeable in some way. In this case it seeks to justify itself as a necessary part of the attempt to prepare for coping with the anticipated situations. But, things can never be helped merely by worrying. Besides, many of the things which are anticipated never turn up, or if they do occur, they turn out to be much more acceptable than they were expected to be. Worry is the product of feverish imagination working under the stimulus of desires. It is a living through of sufferings which are mostly our own creation. Worry has never done anyone any good, and it is very much worse than mere dissipation of psychic energy, for it substantially curtails the joy and fullness of life.” ~ Meher Baba, Discourses

*

“That the birds of worry and care fly over you head, this you cannot change, but that they build nests in your hair, this you can prevent.” ~ Chinese Proverb

*

“Don’t worry. Worry is useless. I worried anyway.” ~ John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

*

“You worry too much. Eat some bacon…what? No, I got no idea if it’ll make you feel better, I just made too much bacon.” ~ Justin Halpern, Sh*t My Dad Says

*

STRANGE MIRACLE

O Wondrous creatures,
By what strange miracle
Do you so often
Not smile?

~ Hafiz, I Heard God Laughing: Poems of Hope and Joy

*

THE PEACE OF WILD THINGS

When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

~ Wendell Berry, “The Selected Poems of Wendell Berry“

*

“Good friends we have had, oh good friends we’ve lost, along the way
In this bright future you can’t forget your past
So dry your tears I say

No woman, no cry
No woman, no cry
Oh my little sister, don’t shed no tears
No woman, no cry

Everything’s gonna be alright
Ev’rything’s gonna be alright
Ev’rything’s gonna be alright
Ev’rything’s gonna be alright”

“No Woman, No Cry” by Bob Marley, available on “Legend: The Best of Bob Marley and The Wailers“

~~~

Lyrics:

“The moment has arrived
We must now stand in line
To protect what we deserve
Take it back from the world

We’re born of whores with poisoned lungs
You command on those weak-kneed
Tilt the balance in their favour
And flourish while we bleed

We do not mean to harm
We are a form that is one
We seek your help as a favour
We shall serve you as allies

Push on the lines
Contact with the third kind
This is the sign
The dawn for human life

We do not trust who are not human
We are the opposition
Our race is tainted by those freaks
Now this third kind is unwelcome

We are victims of loss
We have traveled this far
We sorely need our sustenance
We offer you all we know

Push on the lines
Contact with the third kind
This is the sign
The dawn for human life

Can they be trusted?
We’ve seen no ill will
Their thoughts and behaviour mechanical
All their minds infused as one
They treasure eons of knowledge
The alliance shall prove itself progressive

Push on the lines
Contact with the third kind
This is the sign
The dawn for human life”

Lyrics:

Ravaged paths of those who tried to change their destiny

The complex tact was played with frenzied thirst on battlefields

They tried and failed to cultivate some reason

Malicious mistrust in their hearts

And blood was drawn!

Unfit to inherit earth

The sapiens are now obsolete

Outmatched, outclassed by the rule new breed

The feeling of betrayal by their own creation

Constant doubts would crucify their peace inside

Ch: We’ve reached the point of existence

Where we know we’re not alone

The time has come upon us now

Reveal the Gaia’s Throne!

An accident made the man

Who broke his limits, set his soul free

The mind, the strength and the grace

Of a godlike presence no one believed

“We are all linked as one

The truth lies in forging peace

Such higher thoughts inculcate love

Every soul is an eternal being”

The mark of honor!

The prestige!

The responsibility!

To represent all of humanity!

To stand united

For all humans

To represent Earth!

An interim state of peace

Could be upset by circumstance

They run the whole system with precision now

But dissent exists in the corner of a man

Ch: We’ve reached the point of existence

Where we know we’re not alone

The time has come upon us now

Reveal the Gaia’s Throne!

And we know we’re not alone