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Last night I participated in #edchat on Twitter as I have done on most Tuesday evenings at 7:00 P.M., since I returned to teaching.  I love the discussion, but it is almost turning into “we squeak”.

What do I mean by “we squeak”?  Almost every session that I have participated in seems to have at its core a recurring theme brought up of how bad standardized testing is, other teachers not embracing technology, blocking and controlling IT departments, lack of admin support for technology, lack of interest/participation by parents.  There is a lot of venting and complaining about how bad things are, but not too many substantive ideas on how to improve things (I know it is tough to do in 140 characters or less).  I am perceiving a certain sense of powerlessness on the part of many teachers who participate in this Twitter discussion group.

WE ARE NOT POWERLESS!  We may not decide what will be taught in our classrooms, but we do decide how we will teach teach it.

We are experts in what we are teaching or in my case on my way to being an expert.  Yes I did use the word EXPERT, because that is what we are or will be in our fields.  I have heard that it takes about 10 years to become an expert and that is what I am shooting for to be considered an expert in Literacy, Educational Technology and Special Education before I retire.  I guess that means lots of reading, writing, attending seminars, classes and being active in online communities as a part of my professional life.  It means not sitting on our laurels that we earned years ago and staying current in our fields.

If we do not have these expectations for ourselves, then how can we hope to appear as professionals, to those we teach or in the Court of public opinion, which in many places we are loosing right now.  Each teacher must be an expert in what they are teaching or preparing to be one, how else do we keep our creditability?  In other words that means we have to be at the very least Highly Qualified Teachers (HQT), wow that has a familiar ring to it.

Standardized tests are here to stay.  Sorry but that is the reality we have to accept.  Testing is not going away, so how do we use this focus to help our students?  I am not sure yet, but we have to find a way.  I know that there are much smarter and more experienced teachers/administrators than I am, working on this issue right now.  We have to keep our eyes and ears open to others who are having success and build off what they have learned.  No I don’t like Standardized Testing anymore than anyone else, but it is and will be a part of being a teacher in today’s world for the foreseeable future.

IT Departments and Administrations that lock down the internet.  Okay so they make it inconvenient for some of us to use applications that we would like to use in our classrooms.  My school district has a very, very aggressive blocking policy and I am trying learn to live within our policies  and learn the procedures to get what I want done in the classroom by working with IT and administration, NOT just bitching about it. Get to know your IT people, show them (and admin) the applications and the good they can do.  Work with them, they might even agree with you, but they may have marching orders to keep that you don’t know about. 

IT is not the enemy, but they do have different priorities then you do.  Ask them to help you in the classroom, to see the effect of the limitations that you see or perceive, maybe they have an alternative you didn’t think of to use.  They are a great resource, but only if they are on your side,if you alienate them, they can really make EdTech more difficult than it has to be.   Don’t ask to eat the whole pie at once, keep working at it, you might be frustrated at first, but consistency and showing that what you are doing is working for the students, does a lot more than whining and complaining about what you can’t do.  It does get you what you want – eventually, without alienating those who can help you most.

Complaining about other teachers not embracing technology in the classroom.  If a teacher chooses to not use tech in their classroom, that’s their problem not your’s, but by making it your problem, you are allowing it to affect you negatively and increase your stress level.  I know you are worried about how it affects the students they teach, but if you can’t control or fix it let it go.  LET IT GO.

If you prove that your use of technology is providing superior results in the classroom, than you might be surprised at who comes and asks for your assistance.  Most of these teachers want to do what is best for their students, but are not convinced of technology’s actual effectiveness – to many it is still just another fad.   If those teachers don’t begin to use technology effectively in the classroom, then eventually they will become an island and become rather inconsequential or be forced by new administration (when it comes and they will) to use what works for today’s students – not what has always worked for them.  Either way this issue is beyond your control (usually), focus on what you can control, it is a lot less stressful for you.

Administration not Supporting Tech.  When was the last time you were told you could not use technology in your classrom? There may be a shortage of computers for 1:1 or the equipment is outdated but get creative – use what you have.  We may not be able to use a certain application i.e. YouTube, blogging platform, Twitter, etc. but most administrators and school districts try to buy us all of these nice shiny computers, LCD project, smart boards and the approved software that goes with them (sometimes without asking if we really need it or know how to use it).  Remember sometimes an overhead projector is the technology that is actually needed for that lesson.  Use what is approved, be creative, download YouTube at home and use it during your observation by an administrator.  The biggest thing is work within the limitations set by policy (otherwise you set yourself up for disciplinary actions) use what you can creatively – then push the boundaries when you can.

Keep showing administrators the effectiveness of what you are doing (maybe that significant increase in test scores from your students, compared to those who don’t use EdTech will do the trick?).  Again don’t try for the whole pie at once, be patient.

Uninvolved parents.  This is a whole blog in itself.  It is up to us to keep reaching out to them.  Many parents have had horrible experiences when they were in school or with schools and are badly intimidated by a “teacher” (any teacher – yes even you or me) and it is difficult for them to overcome this “teacherphobia”.  Remember that the next time you talk with a parent, some of them automatically flashback to Mr. or Mrs. _________ and shut down. 

Parents also know their kids better than we do, no matter how much or well we believe we know their child 90% of the time.  If we come off as condescending or only speak to them when their kids are being negative, of course our relationship with them is going to be strained.  Parents can be a teacher’s greatest advocate, but we have to take the first step and sometimes keep stepping forward to have them help us educate their child.

Finally, when was the last time an administrator was in your room, telling you how to teach?  For me there has been no one in my room since I started on October 5th, other than my Teaching Assistants.  The administrators stop by once and a while to ask how I am doing but that is it. 

I am and so are you – expected to teach our students within the school’s curriculum, that is what we are paid to do and we are supposedly experts at teaching.  How we actually do present the information is usually up to us, there are not too many schools that dictate how each class will be taught.  I find that in teaching I have had a great deal more independence and latitude about what I do in my office (the classroom) than any other job or field I have ever worked.

Therefore, if my pay and/or evaluations are going to be tied to test scores, I am damn well going to teach in the manner where my success or failure is something that I am, comfortable with, fits my style and personality.  I don’t plan to teach to the test, but I do plan to teach my curriculum effectively and in a manner that I believe I will be most successful for my students. 

I personally believe that using technology to teach in the classroom is the best way for all students to succeed in life and on Standardized tests.  If I teach my students in ways they can learn, then scores on Standardized Tests scores will take care of themselves.  But the bottom line is it is up to me – about how I present my material and lessons in my classroom and I suspect it is the same way in the majority of classrooms today. 

I am not naive and understand the pressures that many teachers are under, but we are not powerless about how we teach in our own classrooms – WE MUST REMEMBER THAT. 

Why did I use the image at the start?  Because that teacher does not have many of the advantages that we enjoy in our classrooms, but he is still teaching.  Remember we have tools at our disposal that were unheard of just 10 years ago.  It is up to each one of us how we incorporate Educational Technology into our classrooms, not anyone else.  So as Nike says “Just do it.” 

It is after all your choice.

Remember it is about the students

I’ve never really understood calling someone “too smart for his own good.”

Today it was explained to me and now I get it. It has to do with standardized testing.

I spent today in a cool science professional development session at the NY Hall of Science. For anyone thinking about becoming a teacher, science PD is way more fun than social studies PD.

This PD dealt with the chemistry of water and there’s a whole lot more to it than I would have guessed.  Then again, chemistry is the only class I failed in high school. It was political.

The teacher required the memorization of the Periodic Table of Elements. I refused.

I probably could have gotten away with just not doing it if only I hadn’t condescendingly pointed out to the rookie teacher that the whole point of assembling the Periodic Table of Elements was so that poor schnooks who happened to have rookie chemistry teachers wouldn’t have to remember all those details about how many electrons Gonzonium has (names of elements have been changed to protect the innocent).

I have a lot more sympathy for rookie teachers, even rookie chemistry teachers, these days.

In today’s PD  session we counted how many drops of water could be dripped on a penny before it overflowed (a lot) and why (surface tension caused by bonds within the molecules), why detergent weakens those bonds (it has a hydrophilic head and a hydrophobic tail).

We also observed how food coloring dripped into water diffused differently depending on the temperature of the water (in hot water the blue food coloring spiraled like a hurricane) and I learned a new word:

Miscibility.

Miscibility is the ability of two liquids or gasses to mix.

Sounds innocent, right?

Well, miscibility is a very dangerous word.

Its dangerous because using it properly on the NYC or NYS science tests could get the answer marked wrong and lower the student’s score.

Yes, you read that correctly. Using the word properly could reduce the student’s score.

Here’s how:

The teachers who grade the science exams are not required to be science teachers. They could be math teachers, English teachers or, worse, social studies teachers.  Each grader is given an answer key and rubric. The answer key has a list of the words expected in the answer.

According to some of the science teachers in our group who have graded the science exams, the expected words for this concept of how two liquids mix include diffusion, mixing, combining, and blending.

Miscibility is not one of the expected words.

If a student uses miscibility to explain what happens when food coloring is dripped into water and has the bad luck to have a music teacher grade her exam, she will likely have her answer marked wrong.

Some teachers in our PD said they actually warn their students not to use the word at all because using it makes them “too smart for their own good.”

Imagine that, a student too smart for the exam.

Its a good thing we have teachers ready to prevent that from happening.

I took the SAT last Saturday and was able to time myself correctly.  Because I have been doing practice tests, I was able to comfortably take the actual SAT test.  I hope I get a good enough score.  In these types of testing situations, I usually psych myself out and do a lot worse than I expected.  But, this time, I made sure to practice a lot before I took the test.  I made sure to not worry about not getting a good score or doing worse.  I made sure I was calm, cool, and collected.  The only thing I could do was to give the test my all and I did just that.

When applying to a US graduate school, most experts suggest to prospective students to basically care for two things: the standardized test scores and the personal statement of purpose.

For two weeks now, I have been taking intensive, private preparatory classes for the TOEFL and the GRE. Albeit TOEFL’s tangible knowledge requirements, succeeding in the GRE involves a far more thorough preparation. Since I’m applying to a media program, I ought to ace the very demanding verbal section. The key here is to have a solid foundation in grammar and syntax.

If you have paid attention during your English classes in the past, you will have the time to work on your vocabulary. Every day you should be able to learn 50 to 60 new words and their synonyms and antonyms. Believe me it’s not an easy task, but it will save you at the time of the exam. I dare to say that the quantitative section is easier and simpler, because the tasks given are not highly advanced but up to the palpable level of a common student.

Between you and me, the GRE is giving me serious grief, but if that is the price I have to pay to pursue my goals, then I have no other choice. I have decided that I am not a quitter.

Related articles by Zemanta

• VocabSushi.com – Build Up Your Vocabulary (killerstartups.com)
• Words That Can Change Your Life-Studying For The GRE (stacyknows.blogspot.com)
• TopTestPrep.com – Help & Guidance For Preparing Tests (killerstartups.com)

(Parts of this post were inspired by an email I wrote a little while back; so I cut-and-pasted those bits out of said email. This accounts for the size variations throughout.)

GRE: Goddamned “R[W]aste” of Energy….Or, Gee, Really? Exciting!

This is one of my personal vendettas. If I could find a way to permanently ban the GRE and every standardized test like it, I swear to God I would.

The SAT, ACT, and GRE, along with other exams of that ilk, are all distributed by the ETS. The ETS hires professionals in the field of child development and of education to design, write, and administer these examinations. Many of these professionals have actually never set foot in an American classroom as anything other than a student; of those who have, many have not been actually in front of a class for over a decade. They do not test the students, they test key strategic test-taking abilities. As a matter of fact, the test preparation books actually state this outright, or at least all of the GRE preparation books I have looked through so do – to wit, and I am paraphrasing here: just because you can do the Math doesn’t mean that you will do well on the exams. Just because you are a good reader doesn’t mean you will earn a high score on the reading comprehension, and just because you are a good writer doesn’t mean you will do well on the writing section. You have to be good at all of these AND know how to apply the theories behind them to taking the test. In other words, these tests do not measure the students’ readiness for college or higher-level coursework at all – they measure the students’ ability to jump through the hoops designed by the ETS test-design professionals.

The SAT, as you are no doubt aware, was designed initially as a test to determine which Harvard-accepted incoming freshmen would receive scholarships. It was a merit program for a single university. The exam at that point measured student knowledge of subject matter, not student test-taking strategies. Then, somebody jumped on the bandwagon and thought: We should do this at the end of college to determine who’s fit for graduate school, too! In this computer-based era, however, the true point and purpose behind the questions of the SAT and the GRE is no longer to measure what a student knows but whether or not s/he knows how to answer a multiple-choice test. In fact, the GRE books pride themselves on being able to show you how to get the right answer even if there is no information to work with – for example, blank analogies:

________________ : __________________

a. fun, bad
b. dumb, vociferous
c. cute, plain
d. argumentative, quiet

And by process of elimination, recalling that some words can be used in multiple ways, you should be able to figure out that the answer would of COURSE be (b), in which “dumb” is being used to imply “not capable of speech”. What actual knowledge is this testing, beyond one’s ability to make a process-of-elimination answer to a dumb question (here, “dumb” being used in the sense of, “it is pointless, stupid and a waste of time to answer this at all”.)

Furthermore, I know first-hand that this test doesn’t adequately gauge a student’s preparedness for college-level work. I know it because I scored a 1090 (on the old 1600 scale) on the SAT, despite a 3.1 GPA in classes, which shut me out of most of my college choices. (Since I received a perfect score in the verbal section, YOU do the Math to find out why I didn’t score higher overall…) I then went on to earn Dean’s List standing every term at Longwood University for two years, before transferring to William and Mary – nationally ranked among the best public colleges in the nation – where I also managed to earn a 4.0 one semester, AND where I completed a Physics class, four years after my last Math class, and with no Trig or Pre Calc in my background, with a grade of C+…because I’m a good student and worked my ass off.

I then went on to score in the 90th percentile on all sections of the Teacher’s Praxis test (which should show you just how much Math everyday, run-of-the-mill teachers are expected to know…). I have since completed A-level graduate work at American and Catholic Universities, earned my Master’s degree with a 4.0 from Longwood University, presented my research at multiple conferences in my field including the International Medieval Congress at Kalamazoo, and have coached my own students for a decade to high achievement – including a number of 5s – on AP examinations in four subjects – French language, French literature, English, and Art History.

According to my work on the SAT, however, I should have been a secretary in a nice office somewhere. I imagine the GRE – which I HAVE to take to apply for PhD-level work, because EVERYBODY has to take it – will also reflect that I am deficient in the necessary skills to accomplish higher-level coursework, despite the fact of my in-hand MA degree and that my MA thesis is under consideration for publication by an academic press.

What angers me about this is that the ETS party line on this sort of situation is, “well, there are always exceptions, but in general the test does a good job of measuring student capacity for higher level thinking.” In my experiences with my own students and my peers, such exceptions appear to be more frequent than the ETS would like us to think they are. Also more frequent are the fee waiving/reduced fee payments, the canceled scores, and the number of students eligible for extended time due to learning issues. In general, I think the test does a very poor job of measuring the average preparedness of students for higher level thinking. It does a good job of determining which schools “teach to the standardized test”, however, and when “No Child Left Behind” is back on the table I hope to God somebody strikes it down as hopelessly flawed and inadequate. What we need in this country is a system of evaluation that actually evaluates real students doing really thinking and critical work, not artificial replications thereof. I have been and continue to be a strong advocate for moving to a portfolio system, in which students are judged based on a portfolio of their work compiled throughout their high school career, presented and defended thesis or dissertation style in front of a panel including administrators and teachers. This is the kind of thing students will have to do for the rest of their lives – justify their work to their bosses and prove that their work is acceptable according to the standards of the company, school, or what-have-you. It’s touted as being unreasonable and too much to handle, this sort of system – but it would be the only truly fair and equitable way to measure student achievement.

The testing system doesn’t measure the readiness of students for college-level work, so much as it does the test-writing skills and elitist attitudes concerning what constitutes college-ready thinking of the professional test designers of ETS. An interesting study would be to obtain statistics as to how many of those directly responsible for the design and writing of test questions hailed from public high schools in inner cities, or other similar secondary school conditions, how many hail from lower middle class backgrounds, and how many minority groups that are generally underrepresented in such endeavors are represented, and in what capacity.

In my case, I am extremely grateful that my father looked me in the eye when my SAT scores came in and told me it was all just so much bullshit and never to take that score as a reflection of anything but what it is: the score I got on a test I took. With a little less self-confidence and a little less parental support and encouragement, I would not be where I am today if the ETS had its way with me. I currently aspire to entering a PhD program, and for the work I want to do unfortunately the programs I need to apply to are some of the most competitive in the nation. On October 31, I will sit down for four hours in a room and click a mouse on choice A, B, C or D in five sections of a standardized, Computer-Based Test. The results of that test may well shut me out of the programs to which I am applying despite every other proof I can provide of my fitness to, enthusiasm for , and ability to complete PhD-level studies. I may barf.

I have been studying Math for the past four months, for the first time since….ummmm……hold on, lemme check my transcript – oh, yes: 1993 was my last Math class; 1997 was my last science class. Clearly, I have not used or needed either in my adult life and managed to survive – and even thrive. Also, what the hell does “A-squared -plus-B-squared-equals-C-squared” or “(x+1)(x-1) = x squared – 2x -1″ have to do with Chaucer’s Wife of Bath or the social commentary and critique of Marie de France in Lanval?
Actually, I have a great idea: GRE-writers, I challenge you to a duel: I will fashion an examination that tests everything I think is most important and relevant about medieval literature and culture. I will even make it a multiple-choice test, just for you. If you can pass my test, I’ll take yours. My bet is, hell, no, you can’t pass the test – you’ve never even HEARD of this stuff before! Here’s a sample question:

The only extant copy of Beowulf to survive the medieval era is found in which manuscript?

a. BL MS Cotton Nero A.x

b. BN MS C Paris, ff 794

c. BL Cotton Vitellius A.xv

d. Lansdowne MS 851

I rest my case….

Here’s an amazing study sent to me by the amazing Miss Marprelate.

Excerpt:

Drawing from 15 independent testing services, the Progress Report 2009: Homeschool Academic Achievement and Demographics included 11,739 homeschooled students from all 50 states who took three well-known tests—California Achievement Test, Iowa Tests of Basic Skills, and Stanford Achievement Test for the 2007–08 academic year. The Progress Report is the most comprehensive homeschool academic study ever completed.

The linked article reports on the raw scores of homeschooled students vs public school students.

And for the homeschooled students, it also analyzes how certain factors affect the scores:

• household income
• parent’s education level
• parental teaching certification
• parental spending on education
• state government regulation

Please click through and get ready to be impressed!

Image via Wikipedia

Secretary of Education Arne Duncan

Attn: Race to the Top Comments

From NEA’s response to the proposed rules for Race to the Top.

Admirable Goals

NEA appreciates that the Obama Administration is speaking out about a crucial truth:  The current system is failing many students.  If nothing changes, up to half of America’s school children who are poor and minority will not graduate from  high school—a situation that  is not only deplorable, but criminal as well.

NEA applauds the Obama Administration for keeping its commitment to deliver resources to support and improve the public education system. Earlier this year, the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act (ARRA) was enacted, and in July, the Administration unveiled $4.35 billion of those funds as part of the Race to the Top competitive grant program. With the other grant funds described that day, the federal investment will be close to $10 billion. NEA applauds the Obama Administration’s commitment to students at risk—the grant funds are targeted to schools in the highest poverty areas.

Proposal Misses the Mark….

The details of the RTTT proposal do not seem to square with the Administration’s earlier philosophy. The Administration’s theory of success now seems to be tight on the goals and tight on the means, with prescriptions that are not well-grounded in knowledge from practice and are unlikely to meet the goals. We find this top-down approach disturbing;   we have been down that road before with the failures of No Child Left Behind, and we cannot support yet another layer of federal mandates that have little or no research base of success and that usurp state and local government’s responsibilities for public education.

Instead of focusing on strengthening enforcement of civil rights laws to promote access and opportunity for students, the Administration has chosen the path of a series of top-down directives that may discourage rather than encourage productive innovation in classrooms and schools across the country. Despite growing evidence to the contrary, it appears that the Administration has decided that charter schools are the only answer to what ails America’s public schools—urban, suburban, exurban, and rural—and all must comply with that silver bullet, despite the fact that charters have often produced lower achievement gains than district-run public schools. [See recent report on Chicago’s Renaissance 2010 initiative: Young, V.M., Humphrey, D.C., Wang, H., Bosetti, K.R., Cassidy, L., Wechsler, M.E., Rivera, E., Murray, S., & Schanzenbach, D.W. (2009). Renaissance Schools Fund-supported schools: Early Outcomes, challenges, and opportunities. Menlo Park, CA: Stanford Research International and Chicago: Consortium on Chicago School Research.]

….

If we want better results for students:

• We should not continue the unhealthy focus on standardized tests as the primary evidence of student success.

Achievement is much more than a test score, but if test scores are still the primary means of assessing student learning, they will continue to get undue weight. This is especially problematic because the tests widely in use in the United States, since NCLB narrowed the kinds of tests in use, typically focus on lower level skills of recall and recognition measured with multiple-choice items that do not adequately represent higher order thinking skills and performance.

….

Significantly, the most prominent research organizations in the United States have confirmed that test-based measures of teacher “effects” are too unstable and too dependent on a range of factors that cannot be adequately disentangled to be used for teacher evaluation, much less for teacher preparation program evaluation. These include the non-random assignment of students with different characteristics, student attendance and parent support, differentials in school and classroom resources, the specific tests used, and the influences of other teachers.  The use of these measures can also create disincentives for teachers to work with the neediest students—such as special education students and English language learners—whose learning might not validly be assessed on traditional grade-level tests.

Excerpts from the report  selected by James Crawford. ELL Advocates.

“Achievement is much more than a test score, but if test scores are still the primary means of assessing student learning, they will continue to get undue weight. …

“[T]he most prominent research organizations in the United States have confirmed that test-based measures of teacher “effects” are too unstable and too dependent on a range of factors that cannot be adequately disentangled to be used for teacher evaluation, much less for teacher preparation program evaluation. …

“The use of these measures can also create disincentives for teachers to work with the neediest students—such as special education students and English language learners—whose learning might not validly be assessed on traditional grade-level tests. …

“We need to offer incentives so that our best teachers teach the students most in need of assistance, not necessarily teach the students most likely to score highest on a standardized test.”

To download the 26-page document, go to: http://media.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/politics/documents/NEA_documents_082109.doc

Like most of us who are gearing up for the start of another school year, and also cleaning out all the grime and such that seems to find its way into the house via the mailbox, the sand from the beach, dirt from the garden, and the occasional dust bunny I found a true gem in a magazine I was about to throw away.

Just as I’m thumbing through the EDGE magazine insert of the Army Times piled high in the corner of the office I found this great opportunity I couldn’t wait to share.

For those of you with children in high school, the almighty ACT and SAT has been looming over my teen this summer. We’ve discussed the many opportunities to increase her score with tutoring etc – and lo and behold page six jumped at me with FREE ACT/SAT STUDY MATERIALS to children of military and veteran families.

I stopped everything and immediately flew to the laptop to place our order for our free CD or DVD (both are offered) and order additional study guide enhancements offered at discounted prices.

Since I had already taken a break from the never ending purge of all things dirty and grimy in the house, I couldn’t wait to share this fabulous opportunity with our Blue Star Family members.

If you find yourself in need of ACT/SAT enhancements visit www.eknowledge.com/military to order your free study guides for the above tests.

The Power Prep programs come on a single DVD or two CD-ROMs that include 11 hours of classroom video instruction and additional opportunity for interactive learning, according to a news release. The company has already donated free software to more than 95,000 military families.

eKnowledge has partnered with NFL Players to bring this great program to military families. After you sign up for your free copy don’t forget to say THANKS and fill out their survey so they can keep this valuable program moving forward.

HAPPY SCHOOL DAYS to all in the next few weeks.

With two months left until the LSAT. I feel surprisingly good. I’ve taken a bit of a break from studying, and I think it has helped recharge my batteries somewhat. I’m about halfway through Powerscore’s Logical Reasoning Bible, and I’ve taken around 7 practice tests. My goal is 20 practice tests done by the time the test rolls around, with an emphasis on time the entire month of August. I have a pretty good study/work ethic, but when it comes to looking at the same thing everyday for the past 3 months it can really get to you after awhile.

I feel confident though, and this is a first considering standardized tests have always scared the hell out of me. This is something I really want, so I think that alone will push me. The best part will be applying and getting accepted to my first school. It will be almost as amazing as marrying Dan.

In between studying I work, alot, and I’ve been planning my February 2011 wedding. I’m so excited to marry my best friend and have a night with our closest friends and family that we’ll never forget. Unlike a lot of brides, for me, the best part is the planning. We have a lot of time until the wedding so I’m taking my sweet time deciding and planning. I already have awesome save-the-date postcards designed online. Fun times are ahead.

We had engagement pictures done by Sivan Photography a week ago, and I can’t tell you how great they turned out. It was so much fun, and I really felt like I could be myself. You can take a look at some of her work here: www.sivanphotography.com.

I have spent the last three weeks spending countless hours attending Hagwon, and my SAT score in the next couple weeks is projected to be above 2200, if not a perfect score. So, in a span of a couple weeks, I will have raised my rather ordinary 80th percentile for a whopping 2200. Honestly, even to someone who doesn’t give a rat’s ass, it’s impressive.

So what is this Hagwan?

It’s basically Korean cram schools. In fact, I would say that the majority of Asian jokes (focusing around their “intelligence”) are because of these cram schools.

Right now, I am about to tell you about the inner workings of a Hagwon. About why Koreans get 800s. About how they get those scores. I am about to tell you why countless Koreans are taking YOUR potential seats in the Ivy League, and why they kill the curve and your percentile. I am about to tell you why Universities and their admission boards are so confused as to why all these Korean students with excellent SAT scores simply perform horribly after admitted. I am about to tell you why these Universities hate us.

This is the inside scoop, baby.

On Mondays, I have the “gift” of only going to one class from 1:00 to 6:00 (by the way, to all you Tafties, that’s like 5 super blocks). On Tuesdays, I leave home at 8:00 for my 9:00 class. I have three one or two hour classes and end at 4:00. Wednesday, I have class from 12:00 – 6:00 (there are, thankfully, whopping two ten minute breaks in there). Thursday, I have class from 11:00 to 4:00, and Friday’s schedule is basically like Monday’s schedule. Oh, and Saturdays. Every Saturday I take the real SAT (for those of you who don’t know, that’s basically a four and a half hour test). Plus, I also take the Math II Subject Test.

Every night I sleep at around 12:00 and wake up at 4:00. To finish my homework. Every single day. No Thursday sleep-ins.

Furthermore, not only do these Hagwans construct regimented schedules and give loads and loads of homework (two nights of homework at here  = one week of homework at Taft), but they are also crazy Nazis. We get quizzes and tests every day. All our grades (including our homework grades) are emailed to our parents. If we don’t do a little bit of our homework, they tell our parents we have done none. And believe me, most Korean parents will knock up their kids if they don’t get a good enough grade.

Keep in mind my schedule is considered relatively easy. Compared to the other Hagwans out there, the one I go to is “easy.” It doesn’t have “as much” homework. And keep in mind I’m only going for five weeks. Other Koreans either spend their whole summers there, or their whole lives there.

What does this leave me with? Koreans are not smart (okay, some of them are. But every country has a handful of crazy geniuses). They may get 2400s on their SATs. And they may get all 800s on all their SAT Subject Tests. And they may get 5s on all 9 of their AP tests (yes, 9). They may even do extraordinarily well on their necessary IPs.  But they are not smart. They are in no way smarter than Americans. Believe me.

So, if you’re looking for the secret as to how Koreans get perfect scores, here it is. Hagwans. Crams schools. Crazy people.

And you have to ask yourself.

Is it worth it?

my act score came home, and according to asian standards, i fail. yet again.

on the other hand, i LUFF the new safari.

In yet another area of our education system here in the US, we have found that more doesn’t equal better for our students taking classes:

In fact, flat scores in math for the older students have persisted since the early 1970s. That’s despite the fact that the proportion of 13-year-olds taking algebra has more than doubled—from 13 percent to 30 percent—from 1986 to 2008.

Taking more math classes hasn’t made a difference math scores, in almost 40 years here in the states, and more math has been a constant push for students to continue to improve their math scores by the time they are in high school.  But the fundamental flaw in this type of approach is assuming that more = better, because obviously it doesn’t.

What is really going on here?  Well, one commentator in EdWeek stated that some of the kids who hadn’t done well in school would have “gone to the docks”:

One reason that scores for 17-year-olds have stayed flat for more than three decades could be that the kinds of students educated today differ from those educated in the early 1970s, he said.

Back then, Mr. Winick said, “if a young person wasn’t doing well, they’d be sent to the farm or the docks.”

Now, he said, it’s possible that a greater proportion of students who might have dropped out of school in past decades to join the labor force, who perhaps are less inclined toward academics, are in schools.

So now we just have more kids in school who don’t want to be there?  Perhaps this particular commentator hasn’t noticed high school drop-out rates yet, because those are at a staggering 30% in some schools.  But, yet again, the educators here can’t resist comparing our students to those in socialized societal regimes, or even dictatorships, and then stating how our free education policies for all aren’t working:

“There’s still this great concern, particularly in mathematics, that our curriculum is a mile wide and an inch deep,” he said. “The depth of understanding isn’t there, when we look at our Asian counterparts.”

So now we measure our success by “our Asian counterparts”?  Is there a more reductive and racist measurement force for mathematics around, because that seems to make the top 3.

What is wrong with our math education here?  Look at the books.  The books used in Chicago Math, and other math series for children focus on introducing lots of concepts, but not so much practice.  And it’s well-accepted in our society that our children need to learn their addition and subtraction and multiplication/division facts, but not much else is really known culturally about what our kids need to know in math.  We parents are the product of poor math education,and therefore might not be making the most informed decisions about math curriculum or study patterns when deciding what our children should take.  Local school districts are no better, offering a few higher-level math classes but none of the extra support that the sciences have gotten to get kids involved in math.

But then again, who is writing these math tests by which we judge the nation’s student performance?  Do we not take into account the fact that the tests may not measure all that our students know?  Do the math test writers know more than the math teachers or students?  Are the test answer specifications made known to the students?  More isn’t simply better.  Forcing kids to take more math in hopes that their standardized test scores obviously doesn’t work, and look, educators have been pushing it for 40 years now.  At some point in time, you might have expected the administrators to do the math and figure out that this wasn’t working.  But, still seems above their math skills too.

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Although the state of Texas has equivocated on this point, our district has been perfectly clear and consistent: there will be no reading of non-test materials during test time, even by students who have finished their tests.  All must remain seated and book-free until every student has finished the serious business of testing.  (Some will take all day.  That is inevitable.)  Then, and only then, may students resume the frivolous game they call “reading my book.”

Some naive teachers see reading as an appropriate, or at least harmless, use of time for students who have finished their tests.  Such teachers have failed to notice or to predict the effect of this post-test reading on the other students in the room: those who have not finished testing.

I once was so naive, and I kept old National Geographic magazines in my room for students to read after testing.  (I must admit that, in addition to my naivete, I had what one friend has described as “an antinomian streak.”  To heck with the rules, I thought.  The kids should be allowed to readd.  Was I ever wrong.)

There was one girl that year who showed a total lack of understanding of the test process, and a total lack of planning or of sensitivity to her surroundings.  Unlike her peers, she arrived on time, finished her test in the first hour, and simply would not sleep.  She also seemed averse (or perhaps unable) to entertain herself by means of knuckle-popping, cheek-thumping, arm-frogging, or any other form of self-pugilism.

Sure enough, though, she found interest in a National Geographic article about the ancient cave paintings in France.  She was an artist, I think, but she probably couldn’t bear to spend her time creating something that would just be filed or trashed; her interest in the article was probably a way around the no-scratch-paper rule.  I imagine she was thinking to herself, “If I can’t make paintings on the walls of my cave, I’ll just have to read about someone who could.”

There she was, enjoying her article, when suddenly I noticed that the boy beside her looked dissatisfied.  He kept sneaking peaks at her magazine–not because it could have helpd him on his test (I checked to make sure there were no Lascaux questions) but because he was jealous.  Here he was filling in bubbles, choosing one out of several hypothetical answers to a not-very-believable situation (you know the kind: if Sally buys five cookies for $10, and Rick buys three gumdrops for $1…); while SHE, on the other hand, was actually LEARNING: investigating and finding information about a real human event in the real world.

The boy got a look in his eyes–one that said, “I’m not spending any more time than I have to on this test.  I’m getting one of those magazine things.”  He rushed through the test, turned it in, and picked up a National Geographic about the jewelry making practices of an African tribe.

I was a little embarrassed when an administrator came by and showed her displeasure.  Two students were so engrossed in their reading and even more were getting jealous; she could see TAKS evasion coming, and she wasn’t having any of it.  “What’s that?” she asked.  “Geography and painting?  They aren’t supposed to have turned in their tests yet, and they’re not permitted to read until everyone is finished.”

She was right.  I hope it could never be said of our school that culture and creativity trumped TAKS or polluted our data.  Students are, after all, just units; they are measurable entities whose progress it is our duty to measure and record.  We are accountable for their (i.e. our) productivity.  A school is a factory, not a hippie commune. 

Now students who test in my room do not read.  They sit.  I have learned my lesson.  Reading distracts from the business at hand.  It substitutes “learning”–a vague, shifty concept at best–for the hard, concrete facts of assessment statistics.  We cannot have students distracted from academic success by books.

Even here, though, students show some ingenuity.   On the English test, for example, we are required to give students dictionaries.  They can only use the dictionaries on the first half of the test, though; once they start the second half, they must relinquish this one and only connection with the outside world.  Students who work quickly will often look around before opening the second section; they notice slobbering sleepers and lethargic TAKS evaders who will be working well into the afternoon, and they choose to keep the dictionary and read it for a few hours before starting Part Two.  One student in my class read the whole “J” section of the dictionary before I asked her what she was reading. 

I was being clever; if she had admitted to “reading,” she would have been in violation of our policies.  She would have been stalling rather than working on her test.  A well-laid trap, I thought.

“Nothing,” she said.  “Just looking for a word.”  Of course I couldn’t ask what word, because then I would have been offering help (or, at the very least, suggesting to other students in earshot that that word–whatever it was–was one that should be looked up). 

She had me.  “Okay,” I said, and walked away, and she spent the rest of the day on “K” before opening the second section and finishing it in ten minutes, just in time to miss being put in an overflow room.

Students who arrive punctually, finish the test, and cannot sleep–either because of their misguidedly helathy habits or because of an unfortunate natural youthful vigor–craft extraordinary stratagems to keep their minds active during the four to six hours of soul-killing stillness.

They cannot enjoy the stillness, in a Zen or naturalist way, because they are imprisoned in a cell.  Teachers must cover their walls or take down all colorful, inspirational, or educational posters before administering TAKS.  The presence of encouraging messages might give students an unnecessary advantage and constitute cheating.  And very few classrooms even have windows, so the chance of enjoying sunlight to brighten the stillness is next to none.

Instead, students must invent self-entertainments using the very limited tools available to them.  Their resultant activities rival the Apollo 13 landing for ingenuity and industry.

Since students may not bring any non-testing materials on test day (except, of course, for junk food), they must turn infant-like to their own limbs for entertainment.  There are the usual, banal bored-student habits; the jock scratching his armpit, the class clown making water-dropping noises by thumping his cheek, the math team/debate nerd who somehow twirls his pencil on top of his index finger.  But for most students, such easy answers only amuse for half an hour or so.

I saw one student whose eyes seemed fixed at some point in the distance, almost unblinking, for a full ten minutes.  What an effort!  I eventually followed his gaze to the clock on my wall.  Counting the minutes?  But that would be excruciating!  Then I noticed his right index finger laid across his left wrist.  He was timing his pulse.  An appropriate activity: it was the day of math TAKS; he had finished his test and was hungry for more math.  I could see him thinking hard: seventy beats per minute, sixty seconds per minute, seventy divided by sixty is what fraction of beats per second?…

I couldn’t help thinking it was also oa commentary on the effects of this test on one’s soul.  Counting one’s pule is a wordless way of asking, “Am I still alive?”  A good question once one has been sitting still doing nothing for four hours.

Some students even resort to self-mutilation–of the relatively harmless kind that is possible in this controlled, sanitized environment.  I saw one student “frogging” himself after he finished his test: a funny trick I haven’t practiced since middle school. Using one protruding knuckle, you hit a person on the forearm or bicep–hard.  If you hit right, you will see the muscle bunch together and jump up like a frog.  We used to to this to one another while waiting in the lunch line.  This student, because he was not allowed to communicate with anyone for any reason, was forced to frog HIMSELF.  Repeatedly.  For fifteen minutes or more.

I have seen others.  We are not allowed to provide students with scratch paper, so some request kleenex (which we are required to provide) and then draw on it.  Some use the kleenex to make paper airplanes.  Yes, tissue airplanes: these will never fly, even if thrown, which perhaps makes them less likely to be banned.  (I can see the rule now, inserted into the TAKS instructions.  “While waiting for other students to finish, you may not read a book, draw, or make tissue airplanes”…what?)  Students who make these useless instruments show great cognitive power, I think; they seem to be saying, “the Snot-Force One flies in my imagination!“ 

Creative students like these often commandeer their TAKS booklets for creative purposes.  There is a name for this; my wife does it with magazines full of corporate advertisements.  It’s called “creative reclaiming.”  You reclaim the paper, which was originally used for the sake of avarice or propaganda, and use it for healthy, human, soul-expressing purposes.  I have seen TAKS booklets positively TATTOOED with student art: names drawn in huge, shaded, angular letters; abstract and random-looking designs to rival Pollock; dark portraits of loves lost or unrequited.  Boys draw girls; girls draw boys; everyone draws stars, both human and celestial.  Chains, birds, flowers, skyscrapers, super heroes, even pictures of rows of morbid-looking students taking tests.  My favorite students cover their test booklet with sketches or send them back to Austin laden with obscene or rebellious messages.

One student filled his math TAKS booklet with a rather eloquent essay (for a fifteen year old) about the evils of standardized testing.  Not particularly original, but an admirable effort.

No one scores the test booklets; they contain the test questions and nothing else.  The answer document, a four-page, 8 1/2 x 11 scantron from hell, is all that they score.  Does anyone see all of this marvelous art?  The sketches are a cry from the depths of despair; and, true to the despairing teenagers’ fears, no one is listening.  They offer up these half-hearted prayers to a big, empty sky full of indifferent psychometricians who apparently think only in statistics.

One other such message really impressed me.  During the math test, a student turned in his test at noon, but kept his calculator by mistake.  Then he realized he had just given me the only raw materials he had, and had left himself nothing with which to fabricate a soul-saving activity.

That is, until he realized he had kept the calculator we lent him.  A TI-85–an amazing machine that has not only all ten digits, but all twenty-six letters of the alphabet.  A large screen, too, with scrolling capabilities like a computer.

This student typed a multiparagraph letter.  Yes, a letter.  It began with the words, “So it looks like everyone is freaking out about the swine flu virus.  I wonder how quickly it will spread…”  He typed this way for about an hour, until everyone finished testing and I took up the calculators.

He cleared the message–just hit delete, and that was it.  To whom was he writing?  To God?  To everyone?  To nobody?  I will never know.  This was an act of existential courage–an ultimate “YES!” to his own soul and to his own circumstances.  I have never seen anything like it.

All is not lost for the punctual student, though.  For the student who fails to plan ahead and foolishly arrives on time, the first and most obvious course of action is to fall asleep so that the day will pass quickly.  Students have been known to try this strategy both during and after the test, both of which can work if executed with prudence.

A successful mid-test snooze requires some planning and skill to execute properly.  Again, students who employ the method most successfully have learned to utterly ignore the advice of well-meaning adults.  Teachers and principals advise students to “get a good night’s rest” before the test and “eat a helathy breakfast” that morning.  I have even gone so far as to specify “eight hours” of sleep and “fresh fruits and whole grains” for breakfast.  Good sleep and good food make students energetic in the morning–which would be the right temperament if they were required to lay brick or paint a barn or write a symphony or do anything else intrinsically valuable.  Energy and alertness, however, are useless on TAKS day.

The student who must arrive on time–who has no ride to school, for example, and must ride the bus–would do well to stay up all night drinking sugary, caffeinated soda pop and playing video games.  Such action prevents any actual bodily weariness (what would result from physical work or exercise), but will ensure a hazy sleepiness throughout the morning of TAKS.

Heavy sleep is not the goal.  Heavy, healthy sleep is too conspicuous.  We teachers are required to wake sleepers, and since we have nothing else to do, we are actually quite good at it.  A heavy sleeper is likely to breathe heavily, even to snore.  Neither of these are permissible, even after the student has finished testing; for heavy breathing is loud and a distraction to other students.

Pure sleep, then, healthy sleep, is no good.  It invites the worst possible exigency: direct contact between tester and proctor, something that neither party really wants.

No: the effective TAKS sleeper cultivates a zombie-like half-consciousness, an inert oblivion somewhere in the nether region between rest and awareness.  Sleep of this kind wafts the student witlessly past the hours of the morning without alerting the proctor to his status as “a sleeper.”  With any luck, his eyes will remain half-open, so he will seem to be focusing them on his test booklet; the nervous twitches caused by the previous night’s caffeine overload may even resemble vigorous writing or the thoughtful and involuntary weight shifts of deep deliberation.

The student who fails to plan ahead–who gets a good night’s sleep, as his teachers so naively (or insidiously?) advised–will indeed by ready to test early in the morning.  Woe to that student!  He will finish his test in a reasonable amount of time–an hour or so–and will then then have to try to sleep for the next five hours or so while his classmates pretend to finish.  (More later on this strategy: it’s called “dragging out the test to the last possible moment.”)  The student who sleeps well at night, then finishes the test in the morning, is in quite a bind: he has plenty of energy and nothing to do.  Torture.

Fortunately, such foolish lack of foresight has a remedy.

Junk food.  Every student should bring a full-size bag of industrially produced corn chips, which he should eat immediately, and as quickly as possible, after finishing the test.  He should crunch them down by the handful.  (This act has the added benefit of breaking the excruciating silence, and since food is the only allowable accessory on TAKS day, the proctor cannot prevent the student from crunching away.)

A whole bag of chips will hit the bottom of a student’s stomach with all the force necessary to pull his whole body–mind, too–down to the depths of unconscious stupor.

Let him beware, though.  A Dorito-nap is often a snoring nap, and if he draws attention to himself the proctor will awaken him.

Teachers and administrators insist that students arrive on time to school, but whatever our words say, our actions do not encourage punctuality.

Students know that we do not record tardies on TAKS day.  It is too hectic for such a nuanced approach to attendance records; we mark “present” or “absent,” and then our administrators phone home like E.T. to get the absent kids’ butts in their chairs.  The state grades us on our attendance statistics on TAKS day, and we’re too busy working for one hundred percent attendance to bother marking tardies.  So it makes sense for students to relish these last few minutes of soul-breathing autonomy before we shackle them to their desks for six hours.

Fewer than half the students arrive on time.  Even those who arrive early on the bus will loiter in the parking lot for twenty or thirty minutes after the bell.  We are powerless to enforce any consequences for tardiness.

The few who arrive on time must wait quietly for those thirty minutes; they are of course not allowed to talk, play games, or even read.  Everyone knows that we will wait for the stragglers; we will not start the test until at least eighty percent of the students have come.  State law requires us to read the five-page instructions, verbatim, in every student’s hearing.  If we started on time, we would have to read the instructions again and again each time a student arrived.  This action would only distract the punctual ones who had already heard the instructions and begun testing.  It is much easier to wait and read the instructions once we have all but three or four students in the room.

These remaining three or four will arrive at various times throughout the day–two, three, even four hours late, to the dismay of their peers (who will have to wait for them to finish testing before they are allowed to read a book or sketch).  There is of course no penalty for arriving late.

In fact, arriving late is a pretty effective coping mechanism.  Many students have figured out that if they arrive after the proctor has read the directions, he might be in an “oh, whatever” mood.  He might even give an abridged version of the instructions, since most of them are unnecessary and inefficient anyway.  (For example, the instructions use about three hundred words to tell students to copy a number from their test book onto their answer sheet.  With a late student, some experienced proctors will point and say “See this number? Copy it right here.”)

A truly bright student–one who can finish the fifty or sixty ridiculously easy questions in fifteen minutes–should come to school at least four hours late: that is, fifteen minutes before noon.  Then he can hear a very abridged version of the instructions–proctors have stopped believing, not only in education and the youth, but also in justice, goodness, beauty, virtue, and God himself and may shorten the directions to a “here-get started”–forget state law. 

By arriving after lunch, the truly bright student ensures that he will finish his test at just the same time that his final straggling peers do–ensuring that he wastes none of his morning counting spots on the wall or cursing the day he was born–the only two activities seemingly open to his diligent but less forward-thinking peers, who arrived on time and finished the test a reasonable hour or so before it began.

This is the first in a series of posts about TAKS–the state assessment that, for the past week, I have been proctoring at the high school where I teach.

These posts will NOT discuss the test itself: its narrow focus, its cultural bias, its stultifying effects on curriculum.  This is not a “standardized-testing-is-ruining-our-schools” post.

I will, instead, discuss the soul-killing effects of the test administration.  The part that I, the proctor, am responsible for.  I am writing this post because I am personally, individually, directly responsible for killing several souls this week.

Killing.  Souls.

There are three important rules you need to know to understand why I am using this language.  First, the state requires that we proctors read a five-page set of instructions to the students each of four mornings before the test.  These instructions are, verbatim, the same each day.

Second, every student must take four tests: English, Math, Science, and Social Studies–each on a different day.  It does not matter how quickly they finish each test; they must wait until the next day to do the next one.  (Our campus also mandates “benchmark” tests in February–practice TAKS to diagnose student strengths and weaknesses–so students must actually do this entire process twice.)

Third, and this is a “non-negotiable” (to appropriate an administration buzzword), students who finish the test early are not allowed to do anything–ANYTHING–until everyone in their testing room is finished.  In fact, to prevent students from rushing through the test, our campus mandates that no one turn in their answer documents until noon each day.  Students are thus required to spend at least four hours on each exam.  (Each exam has about sixty multiple-choice questions.  Only the English requires any writing.  None of the math questions require more than three steps to complete.)

So, by nine o’clock on the first day of testing, at least three students have finished their tests and begun looking at me, their proctor, with an “Are you kidding me?” expression.  I have denied them access to books, sketch paper, games or activities of any kind, for at least the next three hours; and, looking around at their peers, they begin to realize that some will take even longer than that to finish.

The resultant three, four, or five hours of absolute silence and inactivity KILL OUR SOULS.  As proctor, I enforce the rules: no talking, no reading, no playing, no music, no notewriting, nothing.  When a student looks at another and raises his eyebrows–clearly a look of exhasperation and nothing else–I say in my perfect, monotone proctor voice, “You are not permitted to send or receive messages with other students during the test.  If you send or receive messages during the test, your test may be invalidated.  This means that it will not be scored.”

I walk the room watching students test, watching them finish, watching them DO NOTHING–until the end of the school day.

Of course when everyone DOES finally finish, an hour or so before the school day would normally end, we cannot release them; instead, we must hold them in their testing rooms until the bell rings.  Finally, we allow them to read or draw or play cards, but by now, their souls are already dead.  It is too late.

Yet the souls of some are resilient and industrious.  As I proctor, I notice countless ingenuous coping strategies: improvised circumventions of our road stops, tunnels out of our rigid jail-cell policies that, for four whole days, try to squelch all that is human in them.  I offer the following report as a tribute to those few students’ indomitable spirits.

Today I post the top five strategies.  Tomorrow, who knows?  Perhaps I will tell how we, the proctors, manage to stay physically, if not spiritually, sentient.

The students are more creative than we are, though.  My hat is off first of all to them.

Well, I messed up big-time.

I suppose, when you’re talking about taking the Wonderlic test, screwing up the instructions means you’re … well, not a wunderkind.  I assumed the company providing me the opportunity to take the assessment would deem me stupid and pass me by.

The person recruiting for the company told me it was an abbreviated Wonderlic test; it would be eight minutes long.  They didn’t stutter of hem-haw.  Eight minutes.  Make sure you have uninterrupted time to take the assessment.

I did.

When I got to the site for the test, however, the instructions said to allow twenty-five minutes for the process.  I thought there’d been a mistake by my contact with prospective employer, and I had more time.  I took my time through the questions, made sure the answers were right; I didn’t pay much attention to the instructions.  It’s multiple choice – how hard can it be?

I ran across a math problem; I grabbed scratch paper and pencil.  I started scribbling.  I finally came up with the answer after brushing dust off the math circuitry and clicked the appropriate box.

“Your time has expired for this assessment,” the screen said, a cold, flat refusal in its tone.

I crapped my pants.  I panicked.  I called the company recruiter back.  I explained the problem.  I told her I know it was my mistake, I was sorry, and if there was anything else I could do, please let me know.  She had a bit irritation in her voice when she told me she’d send me another invitation.  I fell all over myself thanking her, hung up, and got the email invitation about two minutes later.  Without delay, I clicked the link and prepared to do major damage to this test this time.  Boy, they’d be sorry they met me.

I clicked the provided link, and the site stared its cold stare into my eyes, chilling my soul.

“All necessary assessments have been completed,” it read, deadly serious and menacing.

A spike of panic-fueled adrenaline.  Oh my God! I wailed, my inward coward wetting itself, I’ve been classified a moron and can’t fix it!  The Test won’t let me have a second chance!  I’m … I’m finished!  I’m done!  I’m … STUPID!

I called the Wonderlic support number.  I got a voice recording stating I needed to leave my contact information and they’d get back to me in 24 hours.  24 hours?! I re-crapped myself.  I don’t have 24 hours!

I changed my shorts.  I flagellated myself for an hour.  Then my phone buzzed.

It was Wonderlic Support!  Patient, wonderful, Wonderlic Support!

They walked me through my problem; they reset everything.  They gave me my second chance.

I wish I could remember the wonderful agent’s name.  She was fantastic, sweet, understanding and never used the words “moron”, “idiot” or “stupid” in any context … aloud.  She was amazing.

If that agent finds this post, I’m sorry I forgot your name.  You were the most wonderful person I met that day, and I wanted to remember your name, I really did.  But I got lost in the heat of trying to fill out the form, the test and get everything done.  Please forgive my lapse, and thank you.

I still may be a moron – the test results will show, and I don’t get them, the assessing company does – but I sure am grateful to have that second chance.

*Whew!*

-JDT-

All original content © 2009 DarcKnyt
ALL rights reserved.

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He didn't even hold for a Tetris. Noob.

There’s nothing like a good ol’ standardized test.

Oh, yeah, and this guy definitely failed.

- Nolen J. Heju

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by Colin Lovett, PICurrent Managing Producer

As most news outlets have reported today, President Obama has given a huge speech on education reform.  With all of the debate about the economy and health care, many felt education might be left out.  You can see articles about his speech here and here.

But I’d like to look at some of the specific ideas he laid out and what they might mean for your community and our kids. 

1. Merit pay for good teachers and the ability to fire bad teachers. Basically, the president wants to make it easier for schools to give bonus money to those who deserve it and remove problem teachers from the classroom.  It’s true that teacher unions have made it harder to remove poorly performing teachers and reward good ones.  The basic concern they have is “who gets to decide when a teacher is bad or good”. Is it all about test scores?  If it’s not about test scores, then how?  Until this concern over standards is addressed, there is not likely to be  movement.

2. Allow for more charter schools and make them easier to close. This is also a touchy subject with teacher unions, which say charter schools take money away from public education.  But many groups believe charter schools offer much needed educational choices, especially in poor communities.  This problem also won’t move forward unless there is general agreement on standards that charter schools will be held to and if they will be different or the same from public schools. 

This brings me to number three.  Have you guessed where I’m going with this? 

3. Encourage states to adopt better test standards. Currently, each state has the ability to make its own standards and call success whatever it wants to. One state can hold kids to a higher standard and have a slightly lower pass rate than a state with lower standards. However, the idea of more uniform national standards is likely to cause many arguments over state and local education control. 

Mr. Obama acknowledged that these reforms and others will cost money, noting the extra education funding in the recent stimulus bill and promising more cash to come. 

If you have a child in school, know what your options are. Take a look at one of our older posts on the ABC’s of finding the right school. Our sister site, ZipRoad, is a great resoruce for finding out more about the schools close to you. 

  What is this?

(summary, thoughts, and review of Becoming an EC-4 Teacher in Texas by Janice L. Nath and Myrna Cohen)

Becoming an EC-4 Teacher in Texas

Chapter 3 – 4 : Designing Effective Instruction pt1

By David Roy

My goal is to write a paper on designing effective instruction. I will use information learned from the book “Becoming an EC-4 Teacher in Texas” by Nath and Cohen as well as personal knowledge and opinion. This paper will be four pages in length, double spaced, and with twelve point font. It will be presented in two parts. Nath tells us we should acknowledge our goals before making the lesson plan. She tells us to be specific. The more specific we are, the more specific we will be for our students. We should also acknowledge our long range goals. My long range goal is to be a certified teacher. The long range goal of a teacher in Texas is usually to meet the requirements of the Texas Essential Knowledge Skills (TEKS) and prepare their students for the Texas Assessment of Knowledge Skills (TAKS) test.

Daily Lesson Plans are constructed to achieve specific Objectives of their goals. When writing an objective, a teacher should focus on what they want the children to learn. Humorously, Nath mentions to not thin about what would be cute for children to do. She says to “Consider the Learner.” Is your lesson age appropriate? What are their backgrounds? Do they have prior knowledge? How can the upper levels of Bloom’s Taxonomy be implemented in the administration of this lesson?

Bloom’s Taxonomy is my favorite thing I learned this year. I think it will also be the most helpful. Naturally, I challenged people to think with their higher order without realizing it. I did not know the words, so I had no name for what they were resisting. Believe it or not, there are many people in this world who would rather not think in the synthesis and evaluative levels. They are content to watch a movie and be done with it. I was always the one to suggest going for coffee to talk about what we just experienced. Consequently, many people did not like to go to movies with me. Instead of revolving talks around the plot, I would branch into the color symbolism of a specific scene or how the work of some philosopher or religious figure touched the creation of a character. In Salem there was a group of kids that watched ABCs “Lost.” Every Thursday we would discuss the revelations of the night before. Without realizing it I was challenging them to use those higher order skills to consider elements and character motivations. At the same time they were challenging me.

The next consideration of writing a lesson plan is assessment. Our society is still in the concrete operational stage. We need proof. Luckily, we have managed our way from the preoperational stage so the proof does not need to be written, but it does need to be observable. It cannot be abstract. Chapter 4 gives a world of ways that we can assess the application of the knowledge gained. Sure, there are tests, but we get enough of those with the standardized tests. There are projects, which some parents will finish the night before it is due anyway. Aside from these two very physical assessments we can assess in observational ways as well. Play, cooperative grouping, and discussion are all examples of observational assessment. These will be discussed further in the second part of this reflection.

Out of the many Lesson Models we encountered in our class, I feel the Madeline Hunter was the most insightful. She takes us from an Anticipatory set (or hook to gain their interest) through the objectives, input (necessary information), the model a teacher will use for demonstration, understanding, and guided practice. She suggests closing the lesson so the dendrites build one more time before independently practicing the assignment. She even leaves a spot open for teachers to evaluate themselves in making future lesson plans.