Play a character; don’t be merely a piece of scenery.

I’ve played a specific character in nearly all my 40+ background acting assignments. Am I crazy? Perhaps. Am I a professional dedicated to improving the final product; you bet your boots!

Many extras think of themselves as a piece of scenery or as an undiscovered movie star. That’s why, when told to sit in row 9 seat A for the baseball game, they sit there and start chatting with the extra next to them until told by the AD to “quiet down.” When they cameras start to roll, they boo the ump or cheer the team; whatever they were told to do, but they don’t know why they’re doing it. When cameras stop rolling, they revert to what they were before: a minimum-wage place-holder chatting with another drone.

That, my friends, is why many are just filling a hole. They do not respect the task or their own worth.

On a late-September 2009 shoot on The Office, I was appalled to find that many of my fellow background actors didn’t even know what the show was about, had never seen it, were puzzled when I mentioned “Michael Scott” or “Dwight.”
If I don’t know the show, I hit Google the minute my calling service hangs up; finding out about the show I’m about to do. It just makes sense if you care about your work.

For the Office shoot, knowing that the show is set in Scranton PA (an area in which I lived for about three years) and knowing the limitations of my skills and appearance, I created Charles “Chaz” Conrad, the owner of Conrad Office Supplies in Wilkes Barre PA. Wilkes Barre is the lesser-known twin city of Scranton. Since Dunder Mifflin is a paper company, it makes sense that I would be someone who buys paper from them. As Chaz Conrad, I struggle daily trying to compete with the “big box” stores like Office Depot, Staples and OfficeMax. I wore a business suit but brought alternatives which included a colorful sweater that looks like something a grandfather would wear. On my trip through the wardrobe gauntlet at the beginning of the first day, the wardrobe lady asked me to wear the sweater instead of the suit coat, as I suspected she would, because she obviously saw my character the way I saw him.

Here’s how this applies to the work at hand:

When the camera caught me standing up to cheer, or being pushed aside by a self-important Dwight Schrute or walking across the lobby of a world-class hotel, it caught a 60-year old owner of an office supply store and not just “an extra in a sweater.”

Creating a character is a foundational part of being a professional background actor. Do the “extra” work to be a character and not a drone and your career will improve. Below are a few of my roles:

!!!

Until I moved to Boston, I didn’t watch much TV.  I watched sports, 24 and Lost.  There were plenty of shows that were recommended to me, but I never really had the time to spend in front of a TV.  I used most of my free time to write, hang out with friends, and play IM sports (though not necessarily in that order).

Anyways, fast forward a couple years, and I’m here in Boston with no friends and a job that has me spending copious amounts of time in my own living room, physically in front of my TV.  I’ve also discovered Netflix Instant, which is basically the broadband internet of watching TV (if TV in the old days was pre-Internet, and TV on DVD was dial-up; at this point, it’s hard NOT to watch old TV shows).  One of the first shows I checked out, after years of recommendations, was the US version of The Office.

I watched it chronologically, starting with season one, which was a challenge.  Season one consists of only six episodes, and in this early going, Michael Scott – Dunder-Mifflin, Scranton’s Regional Manager, is at his most idiotic and hurtful.  In later seasons of the show (basically starting in season two – the writers must have made a quick, tactical decision), Michael is far more human than in those first six episodes.  Nevertheless, I stuck with the show, watched seasons 2-5 in (literally) one week, and now am a faithful, dedicated fan.

N0w the show is funny, to be certain.  There are very successful dramatic elements, but if someone asked you “Why is The Office so good?”, I think you’d still have to answer “Because the jokes are good.”  What I think is interesting is why the show is funny – or rather, why it’s so much funnier or better than other shows on TV.  The four main characters are Jim and Dwight, sales clerks; Pam, the receptionist; and Michael, the boss.  Comedically speaking, the former three are straightforward archetypes:  Jim and Pam are “everymen” (though it must be noted that they have the dual role of carrying much of the dramatic weight of the series).  Dwight is the nerdy, socially inept barbarian who is ironically ignorant of his own qualities.  You could even call him an idiot savant, given that he wins sales awards while showing himself somehow incapable of even interacting in a regular way with the other salesmen.  Perhaps “idiot savant” is new ground for a sitcom.

Michael Scott, however, strikes me as the one primary character who is particularly unique and of-the-times.  To the extent that he is an “inept boss,” he is a character that we’ve seen before.  To the extent that he is “the boss that everyone hates,” he is a character that we’ve seen before.  What is unique about him is that his negative qualities all arise from an embellishment of qualities that are all admirable, or at least pitiable.

Michael Scott is a terrible boss because he just wants friends.  Because he’s lonely.

I think you could argue that it’s easier right now to hate your boss than ever before.  Of course, everyone has always hated their boss, and they always will.  No one likes the person who tells them what to do.  Think of the people you’ve always hated.  At different times in your life, that list has probably consisted primarily of your parents, teachers, bosses, and the police.  It’s a thankless job, ordering people around.  But the fact remains that that hatred is really just a kind of knee-jerk, peer-pressure hatred.  50% of the time, it has nothing to do with who that boss actually is.  It’s a personal reaction to what they represent.

Things are different now, though.  In the last ten years or so, The Corporation has become public enemy number one in America.  It’s the most unifying enemy we have right now, in the grand tradition of Taxation Without Representation, Nazis, Communism, et. al.  It crosses class lines because for 99.999% of people, there’s always someone richer than you are, and it crosses party lines because everyone hates a greedy bastard.

The ascension of The Corporation has transformed hating your boss from something purely personal and almost mechanical into something with a tinge of nobility.  It’s rock n’ roll, the 21st Century way to stick it to the man.  You no longer hate your boss just because he tells you what to do; you hate him because he represents the higher-ups that always screw the little guys with their schemes to acquire more, superfluous money.

And that’s the beauty, timeliness, and cultural resonance of Michael Scott (and, of course, the juxtaposition that makes him hilarious):  whereas the hated boss is now synonymous with the greedy suit who doesn’t care about the people below him, Michael Scott is inept BECAUSE he cares about the people below him, both in the sense that he considers them “family,” and in the sense that he truly, madly, deeply just wants them to like him.

All of Michael’s hijinks seem to come from this incredibly lonely place.  He takes his employees on a booze cruise, and constantly interrupts the captain of the ship not because he’s power hungry but because he thinks people will like him more if seems like the biggest, coolest guy aboard.  He makes crass jokes that are very often offensive, but he makes them because in his social calculus, being funny is the most attractive quality one can have.

The challenge of Michael Scott, then, is to make his underlying longings visible under the buffoonery.  As Verne Gay points out in his recent comments on the current season’s premiere, “Michael is a clinically interesting personality type who is profoundly unempathetic, until such times as he is very empathetic. The wonderful creative trick of “The Office” is knowing exactly the right moment to humanize Michael.”  That, I think, is the longer answer about why The Office is so good.

The longest answer, though, is that the writers always make Michael’s internal logic clear, and this logic goes against the grain of what we want to think about him as one of pop culture’s classic bad bosses.  The Office is great for exactly the reasons Gay points out, but it’s perfectly right for right now because Michael is a character that forces us to re-examine reality and question our instincts regarding a current favorite, widely-accepted, tacit platitude.

And really, that’s what good, lasting comedy does (I think).  Jim and Pam are generally regarded to be the characters do all the hard work for The Office’s drama.  I’d bet that Dwight is generally considered to be the most lasting comic character on the show.  But I think Michael does all the “relevancy” heavy lifting.  And for that, Michael Scott, I think you are in a very unique, beautiful position.

That’s what she said.

Senior Assistant Editor, Suzie Moore, recently submitted a piece to the Splice Capades and placed as First runner up! If you are not familiar, Splice Capades is an annual competition in which assistant editors show off their editing chops by “splicing” two different films together to create a :90 trailer! This year’s mash-up featured the films “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy” and “Network”.

http://www.youtube.com/user/foundationcontent#p/u/0/m6WVv7ijlZU

Suzie says of the experience, “I just love Steve Carrell so when I watched the movies I knew I wanted to do something funny with him as the main character. It was a lot of fun to put together. As first runner up I won a blu-ray player!” Her trailer is absolutely hilarious, so be sure to check it out at the link above!!

There were 25 entries from assistants in Chicago. We’re proud of Suzie every day – this is just “splicing” on the cake!

Me encanta la dupla de Steve Carrell y Tina Fey , junto a ellos están Leighton Meester, Ray Liotta, Mark Whalberg, Mark Ruffalo y Common demostrando que es mejor emcee que actor

Jazz2nite

Hi everyone!  It’s your rock and roll daddy, Max, here with the scoop on all the up and coming musicians that have all the kids talking!

Mom and Dad took me to Huckleberry’s Pizza to another Daytrotter show.  This time we got to see Sondre Lerche, Lissie, and JBM.

JBM played a guitar and wore a flannel shirt and sang some songs.  He has a nice voice and it made me sleepy.

Lissie is from Rock Island where my Grandma and the pizza and my Grandpa are from.  She wears silly glasses and plays a guitar and sings songs about people.  I didn’t sleep very much because the other people eating pizza were very happy to see her and clap their hands when she told them to.  Mom took me to dance in the other big room where a man with a beard talked to me.  Lissie sang a song about Rock Island and a man with pig iron who fooled him and then the song got really, really fast and Mom was very excited.  Rock and roll!

Then all of Lissie’s brothers and sisters and best friends went home after they hugged her and told her how they like rock and roll and bought a t-shirt.  And Mom and Dad moved us to a big table so we could see Sondre but everyone stood up.  Dad told me that he was in a movie that I didn’t see with the silly man from The Office who wants to kiss the pretty lady from The English Patient.  He was loud and very funny and borrowed JBM’s guitar but broke it.  I liked it when all the girls in the room were singing with Sondre because they knew the song.

We were all very tired but it was a lot of fun.  I can’t wait until I am old enough to dance on my own!

The new romantic action comedy starring Steve Carrell and Tina Fey, Date Night, has finally revealed their teaser trailer. It looks meh to me and looks a little corny and extreme. I think the writer’s are hoping the actors are going to save this film from a catastrophe. oh well.

Check the trailer after the jump:

The Fosters are a typical suburban couple whose lives – including their weekly date nights of dinner and a movie – have become routine. To reignite the marital spark, they visit a trendy Manhattan bistro where a case of mistaken identity turns their evening into the ultimate date night-gone-awry. But as Claire and Phil take their unexpected walk on the wild side, they begin to remember what made them so special together.

Another trailer! Date Night, starring Steve Carrell and Tina Fey, two amazing reasons to see this movie. It depicts the Fosters (Carrell and Fey), who are bored with their average lives. One date night turns chaotic adventure, crafted by director Shawn Levy. Now, most people really dislike Shawn Levy, but he does have promise, and has put out a few enjoyable movies, such as Big Fat Liar. This film, as the trailer shows, also includes Mila Kunis, James Franco, and Mark Wahlberg. I am labeling this one as hopeful!

This is a new section.  Instead of putting up each trailer one at a time, I just thought I’d chuck them all in one post.  Unless they’re specifically Changian that is.  None of these are.  Far from it.

Slamming Salmon

Releas Date: December 11 2009

The new flick from Broken Lizard, makers of the genius Supertroopers and the not so genius Clubb Dead and Beerfest.  To be honest, this doesn’t look very good, but here’s hoping.

Despicable Me

Release Date:  July 9 2010

This looks like the usual non-Pixar animated kids flick. Stuffed full of tv comedians like Steve Carrell, Jason Segal, Will Arnett, Kristen Wiig and Danny McBride, lots of empty manic action like Monsters vs Aliens and completely forgettable.

Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief

Release Date: February 12, 2010

The latest in the long line of Harry Potter wannabe’s, this time directed by the useless twat who nearly sunk the HP franchise in the first place, as well as cinematic abortions Bicentenial Man and Nine Months.  I’ve never heard of this, and this trailer gives no indication as to what it’s about except for some kid that looks straight out of High School Musical riding in a presumably magic elevator to a village in the clouds.  The only saving grace is that it reunites Pierce Brosnan and Sean Bean for the first time since Goldeneye.  Opens the same day as The Wolfman. One guess which one I’ll be seeing.

Dear John

Release Date:  February 5 2010

This one’s for Frankie, who as far as I can tell is Channing Tatum’s biggest fan and awaits his next flick like a kid awaits christmas.  Based on a book by Nicholas Sparks, who also subjected the world to ‘The Notebook’.  If you’ve ever had a girlfriend then you’ve had to watch that schmaltzy shitfest.  If you currently have a girlfriend or wife, I recommend dumping them of Febuary 4th 2010.  It’s the only choice of action if you want to avoid this dreck.

Three queries regarding this flick…  Has Tatum ever appeared in a flick where he isn’t in the military?  Who in their right mind decided Amanda Seyfried was attractive?  And why the bloody hell is Lasse Hallström directing this shit?

Love

Release Date:  February 14 2010

This is to coincide with Angels & Airwaves new album. I like A&A and all, but can someone watch this trailer and explain what the fuck this is?

Apple Trailers has posted the a second trailer for the upcoming animated film Despicable Me which hits theaters nationwide on July 9, 2010.

In a happy suburban neighborhood surrounded by white picket fences with flowering rose bushes, sits a black house with a dead lawn. Unbeknownst to the neighbors, hidden beneath this home is a vast secret hideout. Surrounded by a small army of minions, we discover Gru (voiced by Steve Carrell) planning the biggest heist in the history of the world. He is going to steal the moon (Yes, the moon!) in Universal’s new 3D CGI feature. Gru delights in all things wicked. Armed with his arsenal of shrink rays, freeze rays, and battle-ready vehicles for land and air, he vanquishes all who stand in his way. Until the day he encounters the immense will of three little orphaned girls who look at him and see something that no one else has ever seen: a potential Dad. The world’s greatest villain has just met his greatest challenge: three little girls named Margo, Edith and Agnes.

Despicable Me stars Steve Carrell (The Office), Jason Segel (How I Met Your Mother), Russell Brand (Forgetting Sarah Marshall), Will Arnett (Arrested Development), Kristen Wiig (Saturday Night Live), Danny McBride (Tropic Thunder) and Miranda Cosgrove (iCarly).

After the jump is the original teaser trailer.

Copyright Universal Pictures

Universal released two trailers of their upcoming movie “Despicable Me” starring Steve Carrell this week. This animated movie looks as if it will be a sure hit, and I must say I am intrigued by it.

Check out the trailers and tell me what you think!

Gluekit illustration of The Office and Parks and Recreation for Rolling Stone, 2009.

I really liked this movie. It was funny and really enjoyable. I thought Steve Carrell was excellent and has proven once again that he can definitely carry a big hollywood movie. The rest of the main four actors are also good, though the supporting cast (namely the techs and analysts of Control) were out of their league here.
The one thing i didn’t like were the digs at George Dubya. I found them to just be unnecessary and distracting (though i do think James Caan is great). But most everything made me laugh. There is a real kind of classic humour to this movie which is refreshing.
Anyways, bottom line is its a very good movie and you should go see it.

8/10

After this weekend, I lost my life. Not literally or morbidly, but figuratively, most likely in the bottom of a 12-ounce can. But don’t fear, I am back today with a bunch of fantastic shit to blow your mind. Let’s get to it.

We’ll start with those WhoDeys. Ceddy Benson got his revenge. Railed Chicago 45-10. Hot Nuts ensued, and that’s where my Monday went out the window. Even baby Bengals ain’t scared of a Bear.

-Hey Steve Phillips. You’re dumb. Maybe he should call another one of those fake press conferences to tell everyone that.

-Peja, you sly dog you. Not a good idea to bang porn stars who Tweet.

-I don’t know if it’s just me, but I find this hysterical. Cute little puppy. He probably only killed them after they were all old and kicked to shit by another dog. But good news, he’s buying dog food, not electrocution apparatuses.

-And now two things that probably interest just me.. but it’s my blog so I’ll do what I want…

-This guy is really named Harry Potter, and he’s pissed.

-Steve Carell is starring in an adaptation of Rick Reilly’s book Missing Links. I’ve read the book. It doesn’t suck. A group of guys playing a piece of shit muni course with something like Augusta National next door. Hi-jinx ensue as they try to find a way to get off on the Augusta-ish place. I’ll pay to see it.

-This is why Tom Brady is a douche. Wear sweatpants bro.

-Finally, one of the funniest videos I’ve seen in a while because I have the sense of humor of a 12-year-old kid. I don’t care. I lose my shit every time I see it.

That’s all for tonight. I’m being productive. Nevermind, basketball started. I think I’ll lay in bed. Smell ya

Cheers.

(This is the first blog from my new MacBook. The plan is, now I have my own laptop and am not sharing my husband’s PC, that this happens more…)

Anyway, Chris and I watched The American Office tonight. It’s on ITV4 now. We’ve seen bits before but not whole episodes.

Some observations:
1. There is not enough background noise. It’s noticeable.
2. Chris kept trying to figure out which American character was which British character.
3. I can’t watch Steve Carrell now without remembering how great he is in Little Miss Sunshine.
4. I need to watch more of it, I think. Didn’t strike me straight away (mainly for the above reasons).

Special Thanks: TwiFans

Recent Gluekit illustration of The Office for Entertainment Weekly magazine, 2009.

I’ve been seeing the trailer for The Stepfather a lot lately, which led me to create this post.
Question: Which Gossip Girl cast member is landing the best gigs?

Blake Lively

She starred as Bridget in ever-so popular The Sisterhood of The Traveling Pants 1&2
“Girlfriend” in New York, I Love You. She starred along side big names such as Bradley Cooper, Shia LaBeouf, Natalie Portman, Orlando Bloom, Hayden Christensen, Christina Ricci, and Rachel Bilson.
Also as Monica in Accepted, which stars Jonah Hill and Justin Long.

Leighton Meester

Leighton has had a lot of  TV exposure, with parts in shows such as Entourage, CSI: Miami, House, Shark, Numb3rs, 8 Simple Rules, 24, 7th Heaven, and Law & Order. On the movie side of it all, she hasn’t been in anything too popular. Date Night, slated to release in 2010, is supposed to be hilarious, after all it does star funnies such as Steve Carrell and Tina Fey.

Penn Badgley

He stars in the new movie The Stepfather, which is doing pretty good at the box-office, right? He also had a bit in John Tucker Must Die along side Brittany Snow and Ashanti. He also has TV experience on Will & Grace, What I Like About You, and The Young and The Restless.

Chace Crawford

Off the top of my head I can’t think of anything he has starred in, so I reached out to my dear friend IMDB.com for info.
He lent his voice to Family Guy and Robot Chicken in 2008/2009. He is also playing the lead in Footloose, out in 2010.

Taylor Momsen

She’s probably best known as Cindy Lou Who in The Grinch Who Stole Christmas. She was also in We Were Soldiers which also starred Mel Gibson and Keri Russell.

Ed Westwick

I am fairly sure Gossip Girl is his first “big” acting gig. He was in Californication for an episode in 2009. Also, he played Randy in S. Darko, which I refuse to see. BUT, he is starring at Heathcliff in 2010’s Wuthering Heights.

So, which cast member do you think is landing the best gigs? My vote goes to Blake Lively, or Leighton Meester. Although Ed Westwick’s part in Wuthering Heights is sure to put him on the map, as well as Chace Crawford’s part in Footloose.

]]> http://anthonygeorge.wordpress.com/2009/10/21/what-you-may-not-know-about-the-two-overnight-sensations-who-are-making-glee-your-favourite-new-show-of-the-2009-2010-television-season/ Wed, 21 Oct 2009 09:00:31 +0000 George Anthony http://anthonygeorge.wordpress.com/2009/10/21/what-you-may-not-know-about-the-two-overnight-sensations-who-are-making-glee-your-favourite-new-show-of-the-2009-2010-television-season/

MORRISON: as 'Mr Schuester'

LYNCH: as not-so-sweet Sue

It seemed like they came out of nowhere, this tall, lanky high school teacher and the razor-tongued athletic coach determined to be his nemesis. If they’d been major players (or even minor ones) on earlier TV shows, I’d obviously missed those series. And even after Glee made its auspicious and, yes, spectacular debut as a test pilot, no one ever said, “Oh you know him, he’s the guy from Law & Criminals: Baltimore.” Or anything even remotely like that. We saw him in action. Then we saw her in action. And then we went wow! — who are these people?

MORRISON: in South Pacific

Apparently we were looking for answers in all the wrong places. We should have been looking to Broadway. Matthew Morrison, who plays Will Schuester, the Spanish teacher who decides to try to resuscitate the high school glee club, is an accomplished song and dance man who co-starred in the sensational still-running Lincoln Center revival of South Pacific, nightly revisiting such Rodgers & Hammerstein classics as I Have Dreamed and Carefully Taught.
And when he isn’t playing the beleaguered high school teacher in the runaway hit of this TV season, he’s working with his South Pacific director Bartlett Sher on developing a musical version of Pedro Almodovar’s Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown.

LYNCH: with Streep in Julie & Julia

(Who knew???)
We sure knew he could sing and dance, however — and stay in character — after we saw him ‘teach’ his irresistible Glee club misfits how to sell a song. (Still don’t know what I’m talking about? Just click here.)

As for the outrageously funny Jane Lynch — frankly, and i mean candidly: Where Have I Been? She’s been a popular recurring multi-episode player on such long-running hit series as Boston Legal, Criminal Minds, The ‘L’ Word and Two And A Half Men. Comedy

GLEE: tonight at 9 pm

aficonados will tell you in a heartbeat that she performed all her own singing and guitar playing in A Mighty Wind, and that she made them scream with laughter when she appeared with Steve Carrell in his breakthrough film The 40 Year Old Virgin. (Morrison also has on-screen history with Carrell. He played the cop that wouldn’t get off his case in Dan In Real Life.) What many of her fans don’t realize, however, is that Lynch is currently on screen with Meryl Streep, playing the small but key role of Julia Child’s sister in Julie & Julia. And that she opens off-Broadway with Tyne Daly tonight — yes, tonight — as part of the rotating all-female cast of the new Nora & Delia Ephron opus, Love, Loss And What I Wore. So she continues in very good company, on stage and screens.

MORRISON: Broadway baby

LYNCH: TV veteran

So does Glee. Two weeks ago, barely into the run of the series, Glee cast recordings accounted for 10 spots on the iTunes list of top 200 downloaded songs and four places on the Billboard Hot 100 for the week. The top-selling Glee cast recordings included two mash-ups created for the series — one of Bon Jovi’s “It’s My Life” and Usher’s “Confessions Part II,” and the other of Beyoncé’s “Halo” and “Walking on Sunshine,” by Katrina and the Waves. And more sales are in the offing. On Nov. 3 Columbia Records and 20th Century Fox Television will release Glee: The Music, Volume 1, the first in what is planned as a series of soundtrack albums. And last week the Fox series made more headlines when NBC reneged on its invitation to have the Glee cast perform during the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, which it broadcasts. So now the Glee cast will perform during the World Series, singing the national anthem in either Los Angeles or Philadelphia, depending on the outcome of the playoffs, during game three of the series, which is telecast by Fox.

Still wondering what all the fuss is about? To catch up with the pilot that started it all, just click here. To catch a new episode, tune in tonight at 9 pm to Fox or Global. And enjoy!

TOMORROW:

More star-studded news and views

from Vanessa Williams, Lily Tomlin and more.

-/-

“Sure, lots of guy celebrities are handsome, but some of these hotties distinguish themselves with such a spectacular singular physical feature that it makes it impossible to keep us focused on silly things like, say, plot. Read on for the 15 most droolworthy biceps, buns, abs and more.”

That’s according to Glamour.com. According to me and my gaggle of cronies, divas, misfits, and other people I call friends, this list is totally incomplete. Talk about sad shortcomings and bedroom downfalls. They can have ‘em as far as I’m concerned. I have my own delicious list of sultry, titillating men that beg to be eaten off a spoon.

1. Seth Rogen’s sweet hair

Billowy, fluffy, and curly. Can you just imagine how smooth it feels between your fingers? Seth may have lost the weight, but he’s certainly weighed on my mind.

2. Brad Pitt’s bro buzz

We all agree that Brad can do no wrong. Well, with one exception. But overall, the buzz has been one of my favorite incarnations of Brad to date. Why? Because I’m a sucker for the miniature golf course putting green texture. Dare to defy me on this.

3. Steve Carrell’s strong nose

It’s prominence is a force to be reckoned with. What’s sexiest about Steve is that he doesn’t think he’s sexy at all. Oh, but I beg to differ.

4. Rainn Wilson’s puckering mouth

Carrell’s The Office counterpart has his looks going for him, too. Just don’t tell him that. While unconventionally cute, Rainn’s mouth is what attracts me to him the most. That little pucker of sarcasm sitting atop his upper lip anxiously waiting to pour out is palpable. Can’t you see it?

5. Gerard Butler’s heavenly harsh scruff

Facial hair is a make or break situation for any woman. But for Gerard lovers, it’s totally doable. Panties drop simultaneously for a go at his face. I’d happily go to work with dry skin and beard rash any day. Just a FYI, Gerard. :whispers: If you can hear me.

6. Bruce Willis’ bald exterior

How any woman can ever find a bald head unattractive is beyond me. Bruce must apply shoe shine nightly because his baldness beams to the edge of the moon. Just like our my love.

7. James Franco’s flawless cheek bones

James Dean reincarnated. This is bone structure most models die for. Is he grinding his teeth? Or are they always like that? Who cares! I can’t help but wonder how his structure moves when he chews. Is that weird?

8. John Krasinski’s love-me eyes

Puppy dog eyes to the extreme. Waking up to these beauties every morning must be bliss. Emily Blunt is one lucky bitch.

9. Daniel Craig’s dynamite abs

My eyes must be deceiving me. It’s like a mirage; the male version of Daryl Hannah slowly emerging from the water to have his way with me on the beach. Never before did I know Speedos could fit this well on a man. Meow.

10. Michael Ian Black’s scrutinizing eyebrows

On what level is Michael Ian Black really judging me? That’s what I want to know. And the anticipation is hot. Just sayin’.

11. Conan O’Brien’s ivory forehead

A landscape of pure, open ivory space. Full of God knows what. Do I hear a plane landing or is it just me? I hope there’s room enough for both of us.

12. Lance Armstrong’s do-me legs

All that cycling, milk, and Sheryl Crow really does a body good. Phew! Who wouldn’t want those wrapped around your very being? Day and night, night and day. Feel the burn, ladies. Feel the burn.

13. Denzel Washington’s glittering smile

Lights are blinding. They say a smile is worth a thousand words, but in Denzel’s case I think it’s safe to say his aren’t allowed a price tag. Can I be a part of your chocolate high?

14. Adam Sandler’s endearing egghead

He may hear endless scrutiny and bad jokes for a head he can’t control, but in my humble opinion I think it’s impossibly sweet.

15. George Clooney’s pearly whites

There’s nothing like saving the best for last. George’s devilish sense of humor seeps through his gorgeous smile and infectious laugh. Teeth have never before been made with such perfection. MmmmMmmmMmmm.

This list wouldn’t be complete without this honorary addition. This man can wear a suit, command a room, and give Tina Fey a run for her money on her very own show. Skill, style, sensuality, and sex is why special number 16 sizzles. The ultimate man’s man. Every woman loves her Hamm.

16. Jon Hamm, the every man.

Images thanks to people.com, eonline.com torontolife.com, seth-rogen.com, scrantonbranchoffice.wordpress.com, kepplerspeakers.com, & rottentomatoes.com

A highlight of Season 6 for ‘The Office” as Pam (Jenna Fischer) and Jim (John Krazinski)  tie the knot in a comical spoof of the ‘JK’ Wedding that was a hit on Youtube earlier this year.  Gotta love it!  Everyone from Steve Carrell to the little Flower Girl got their groove on!  Cute

The JK Wedding party

source

It’s that time of year again.  The leaves are changing, Jack-O-Lanterns are on display, and college girls around the country are trying to come up with what “Slutty” something-or-other they will be this Halloween.  Which is what prompted this article.  I love Halloween.  So it goes without saying that I love an in-depth creative costume choice and loathe a generic, simplistic one.  Below are some 2009-centric ideas that I would LOVE to see out in the public domain this Hallo-day.

1. George Lukas and Steven Spielberg raping Indiana Jones, or a stormtrooper.

2. Shakira writhing around in some form of epileptic interpretive dance, as referenced in her She Wolf video.

3. Kanye West-run around all night interrupting people’s conversations with a mic in hand.  Bring a Taylor Swift with you to further interrupt.

4. The Mighty Boosh-Vince, Howard, Naboo, Bollo, and Bob Fossil in some form or other.  Bonus points for going as one of their more elaborate side characters, like the band from the episode, The Priest and the Beast.

5. Kate from Jon & Kate Plus Eight toting eight babies all tied to a single rope, sans-Jon.

6. A plethora of Lady Gaga’s all fighting for attention and leadership in that poor girl’s clearly multiple-personality-driven head.  It would have to be a group outing, but it would COMPLETELY be worth it.

7. I would LOVE to see the entire cast of The Office simply to see if it could be pulled off correctly.  As Michael Scott and crew have fairly uniform appearances, it would take quite the striking resemblance of ALL characters involved to pull this one off.  If done properly, however, it could be FAMAZING.

8. Christian Bale (who I still love) constantly attacking a lighting guy as he sets up his rig in the middle of the street.  This would obviously require two people, and some sort of lighting rig, but with an uncanny Bale look-a-like and a slipping Welsh accent, it could be kind of fun.

9. Fox Studios Destroying Wolverine-This one is VERY high concept but probably my favorite one.  Dress up clearly as Hugh Jackman’s Wolverine and then spend the rest of the night demolishing toy helicopters (as Jackman does in the film), crappy Deadpools with stitched-up mouths, and comic books in the symbolic act of Fox destroying everything sacred about Wolverine, The X-men, and Marvel Comics.

10. Zombieland-Go with me on this one, I know it sounds generic, but just think, if you and three friends dress as the characters from Zombieland (which was AMAZING, by the way), complete with weaponry, you can spend all night running around interacting with people who dressed up as zombies!  Namely, killing them, but that’s not the point.

Bears With Sparklers

#2!

Check the huge red glasses and the white shoes...such a geek...My grandma, who is now deceased, and my aunt in the background...

Hello World,

I know that according to Wal-Mart and other chain super retailers, we are now officially in the Christmas season…but for me, the Christian season doesn’t actually begin until Dec. 1.

So what’s to do in those days that follow Thanksgiving leading up til the big day? Well, I decided to clean my refrigerator…I’m ashamed to say I found various sauces, condiments, salt fish, chicken etc. that probably have been there since 2008…As I type, I know my ability-to-be-a-wife quotient is probably lessening with each word…And let me add for emphasis, the reason that I finally decided to clean out my fridge is that I started to smell the fumes of something that even the nearly air tight doors could no longer keep in…(If my mom, who is super neat, read this post, she would not be happy…oh well)

So back to my gross fridge, as I was emptying the contents of my fridge into several trash bags, I decided to watch a movie…I happened upon the movie “Little Miss Sunshine.” I’ve seen it before, but it’s worth watching again…Of all of the funny yet poignant things that happened in the movie, this quote stands out…indulge me and read it…I swear I’m going somewhere…

Dwayne: I wish I could just sleep until I was eighteen and skip all this crap-high school and everything-just skip it.
Frank: Do you know who Marcel Proust is?
Dwayne: He’s the guy you teach.
Frank: Yeah. French writer. Total loser. Never had a real job. Unrequited love affairs. Gay. Spent 20 years writing a book almost no one reads. But he’s also probably the greatest writer since Shakespeare. Anyway, he uh… he gets down to the end of his life, and he looks back and decides that all those years he suffered, Those were the best years of his life, ’cause they made him who he was. All those years he was happy? You know, total waste. Didn’t learn a thing. So, if you sleep until you’re 18… Ah, think of the suffering you’re gonna miss. I mean high school? High school-those are your prime suffering years. You don’t get better suffering than that.

This is a conversation between the angst-ridden high schooler who discovers he’s color blind thereby obliterating his dream to go to flight school and his gay uncle who survived a suicide attempt. By the way, Steve Carrell plays the uncle…he is perhaps the funniest white guy ever…next to Jim Carrey…

So my question for this post is: What has suffering taught you? What are some things that pain taught you that may have not learned otherwise?  I know, I know, somewhat of a morose post after eating yummy food, reconnecting with the fam and thanking God from whom all blessings flow and what not…

Since high school suffering was mentioned in the movie, I gotta say most of the people that were hella popular in high school probably should have suffered just a little bit…it would have given them something to aim for…as it stands now, a majority of the people that seemed to be on top then don’t seem to be too interesting now…and some of them look practically ancient…guess if you start clubbin’, boozin’ and wilin’ out at 15, you’re bound to look old in your mid ’30s. 

High school Jackie went through some suffering…She couldn’t go to parties…She wore big red classes that covered more than half of her face…She could date when she was 16, but wasn’t asked out until she was 17…She was not asked to be in any of the cliques…She frequently spent time an inch away from the mirror analyzing her eyebrows…She was accused of smelling like fish because she had a penchant for eating salmon croquettes before football games…and on and on…

(Yes, I was referring to myself in the third person…) Truthfully, I was in the low B maybe High C crowd…definitely not an A lister. Well, what did it all teach me? Well for one, I wasn’t drinkin’ and clubbin’.  I’m sure that my youthful glow is due, in part, to my delayed entry into the club scene…Also, I was forced to develop friendships with people based on personality rather than popularity…And as result, some of those people are still my friends today…And it made me yearn for something better…i.e. college…I was convinced I was going to be The Truth just beyond the “insipidia” (made up word) commonly referred to as high school… Sidebar: I must say though many of the rappers that hail from the A or their wives graced the halls of Benjamin E. Banneker High School, and many of them were kinda popular even back then…oh well…but I do believe they are the exception rather than the rule…

Since I decided to become a Christian, I have suffered through trials due to my stance on certain issues…It has not been pretty. As people say, Jesus won’t bear the cross by Himself. If you believe in Him, at some point, you have to suffer…no I have not been persecuted like what is described in the Bible, but I have been ridiculed by people for my beliefs…I wrote an article on “The Prayer of Jabez” frenzy…remember that…So I met the author of the book, Bruce Wilkinson, at a rally, and I wrote about him and the rally…So my editor had to read the article before it was published…Below is a snippet of the conversation that took place during the editing process…

Ogre boss reclines in her easy chair. Her office door is ajar so she can conveniently bark orders at random to cringing staff in the newsroom.

Ogre boss: Hey Jackie!

Jackie: (Holding her arms around herself to somehow visibly shield herself from the verbal assault sure to ignite…) Yes…

Ogre boss: When you pray “The Prayer of Jabez,” do you pray for a new boss?

She cackles and snorts similar to the Wicked Witch of the West in “The Wizard of Oz.”

I say nothing…what was there to say…I know what I felt like saying…I won’t say because some of y’all think it’s not appropriate for Christians to curse…(Good thing, you’re not with me 24/7.)

Six months later, she fired me…Good riddance I say….And I moved on to a better situation in every way…suffering taught me that God can protect me – even from people who don’t like me because I’m a Christian, cuter, younger and even more talented – bitter, you say?…naw…really though, it’s all good…

And the truth is, the best writers have suffered through some thing…. How else can you write something that moves people? I could go on, but eh, I don’t feel like it…

So what has suffering taught you? Marinate on that…AND post comments on that..please…

I will add this…my absolute fave verse in the Bible…

All things (GOOD & BAD things that happen) work together for GOOD for THOSE who love Him and are called according to HIS purpose. Romans 8:28

God can bring good out of suffering…

P.S. I’m sure that Nelson Mandela suffered terribly while he was in jail for 27 years, but I’m sure that the same internal fortitude he developed in jail as a result led him to being the first elected president of South Africa…Yes, I plan to see the new movie “Invictus.”