Historically, a social game is one that you played with friends so that you could socialise while you were playing. Board games, card games, RPGs all involve having a group of people in the same room and even if you took your gaming extremely seriously, there would be time to chat between rounds.

The social part of MMOs is grouping. Again, you’re tackling the game with a bunch of other people and if they are also friends then you can chat while you kill mobs together. Even if you aren’t grouped up, an evening in the MMO for a social player means chatting to your mates via various text channels while you pursue other goals in game. But in a facebook-type social game, you interact with people without talking to them at all. Just send someone a virtual cow along with a virtual poke and maybe they’ll respond later.

So I wonder, how social can any game really be if you don’t talk to anyone? Are we heading towards the ironic situation where Bartle-type social players dislike ’social games’ because they aren’t social enough and you can’t really get to know the people you are playing with?

I feel the overwhelming urge to write about my thanksgiving all the sudden. The actual thanksgiving day I’ll get to. I want to start with tuesday night. Shane got here really late tuesday night. My dad and i stayed up until around 12ish sitting on the stairs in the foyer waiting for him. It was pretty funny because all day I was pretty excited that Shane was coming and this was the first time that I could tell that my dad was pretty excited also. So after chatting with Shane for a bit, we all went to sleep.

Wednesday was a pretty chill day. We all hung out and talked. Shane had to take his car to a Saturn dealership to get fixed so my dad and i went with him. Darrel met us there and the four of us hung out in the lobby talking about random things like how cool/uncool our phones are, jobs, and various other things. Then we went to church and had “pumpkin pie fellowship” as my dad fondly calls it. Hannah was home from school and it was the first time Tim, Riley and I had seen her since she left, so that was really exciting for all of us. The entire Carlson family came over after church and we all sat around in the living room and talked. Bjorn came also, so there was a lot of catching up to do between both families.

Thursday…turkey day. I woke up around 11, got dressed and ready for the day and entered the kitchen where my dad asked me to go on errands with him. So we went to the church to pick up some stuff and then to the store. We got back and my mom was cooking, everyone else was already eating cheese and crackers which is our traditional pre-turkey snack. Darrel and his girlfriend Elena arrived around 1, so the 9 of us packed into the living room and talked for a long time before the actual eating. The food was amazing, as it always is (HAHAHHA that garage door just opened because Shane just got back and it scared the CRAP out of me) and we all ate too much. Then there was a cooling down period of an hour before pie, and then after a REALLY fun game that Elena taught us, we all went to the basement where we watched A White Christmas. My dad faked tears during the beginning as he likes to do, there was singing along, there were inside jokes and dancing… Around the point in the movie when Choreography comes on Darrel, Elena, Megan and I went upstairs to find something to eat and ended up staying there until the end when they do the ceremony thing for the General. The four of us hung out in the kitchen for a while, but eventually Elena left and went back to the movie. So darrel, megan and i sat in the kitchen laughing hysterically at each other (SHUT IT, LOCK IT UP!) like we used to when he lived with us.

Then we get to today…or yesterday I guess. Woke up really late to my dad singing incredibly loud with some christmas music. Hung out in the living room/dining room all day writing and pretending to do homework.

To most people, these last few days would seem incredibly boring. I didn’t really go out and do anything, and nothing really big happened, but these last days have probably been the best days I’ve had since school started. I haven’t been home for more than 24 hours in a really long time and I’d forgotten what its like to have day long jokes with my siblings, or get to hug my mom whenever she comes home from work tired. My family is really at their best during the holidays. I don’t want to say it makes us appreciate each other more, but I think it really shows all of us that we’re lucky to have such good friends and that we’re so close as a family. I love sitting in the living room and talking for hours with them. I never get to do that with anyone anymore. My roommates are amazing (the only downside to the holidays is that I see them less)  but we don’t sit in the living room for hours upon hours talking about anything that comes to mind. I’m not saying that we should or anything, but I love being able to do that. At any given point during these last few days I could walk into the living room and someone would be sitting around. Yeah, most the time its my dad, but once people hear us laughing hysterically they join in. Laughing is like a magnet to my family. Always go where there is laughter. Maybe that’s why I feel the constant need to tickle megan, or pretend to fight jake. I need the laughter all the time. EPIPHANY!  HEATHER, MAYBE I LAUGH INCREDIBLY LOUD AT TV SHOWS BECAUSE I HAVE TO FIND A LAUGHING OUTLET! Whoa.

So yeah. Home is good. I feel good here. Being here makes me never want to leave again. I keep thinking about having to go back sunday and thinking about my little room at school and having to do my own dishes…we have a dishwasher here and its amazing. but yeah, i don’t want to go back to Concordia. I’m just dreading the thought of having to go back. I check my email compulsively there and i’ve checked it maybe once a day here. I’m not on facebook more than twice a day. If i’m on my computer at all its to play music or to write. Its the atmosphere here I think. It would take a lot to make me truly upset while I’m here I think. This house is my bubble and the people in it are security blankets. Megan gets sick of me once in a while but all it takes to get her back is tickling her or hugging her until she laughs. Most the time its a combo. Tim is always pretty cheering around thanksgiving, so I don’t worry about him getting mad. today he was going on and on about not giving into the machine. Hopefully this will pass because if anyone is part of the “machine” its him. He’s addicted to farmville, his phone, his laptop, the internet, and tv. I mean, I may be addicted to 4 out of those 5 things, but at least I admit to it. Jake is always happy. he’s been hilarious. When i got here on tuesday he was watching The Office on youtube. He LOVES the fire safety episode and watches it everyday. So I showed him The Office on hulu and now he’s working his way through all the clips. heather, if you think I’m a vocal tv watcher you need to listen to jake. I can be in the computer room of my house on the second floor and I’ll hear him laughing from his room in the basement. Its HILARIOUS to hear and you can’t help but laugh. My dad LOVES the holidays, so he’s typically in a good mood. My mom gets stressed about the holidays sometimes but we’ve all learned how to sense her stress level and tend to help her out.

Of course Shane plays a large part in this happiness. I don’t think any of us can get really upset knowing that he’s in the house. I just LOVE my house in the holidays. Maybe I won’t come back monday and I’ll just finish online or something. My dad would never let me do that…bummer.

Alright, well i’m tired now and all i’ve managed to do is talk about my family again. sorry all. just wanted to update.

love Emily

The last 3 nights have been really good! She has slept from about 7:30 to 5:30 each night, when she wakes at 5:30 I fed her and then she went back to sleep until sometime between 8:00 and 8:30. I have come to realize that I can’t really ask for much more at this point I have decided to just keep the 5:30 am feeding and let her eliminate it on her own as I am sure that she will; over the last few days she has creeped closer and closer to 6:00 anyway. Honestly, I have to admit too that I would rather get up at 5:30 to feed her and go back to sleep until 8:00, than get up for the day at 6:30 or 7:00, selfish mommy decision. Well I guess it wasn’t fully my decision, this is what is working for her and we decided to go with it- don’t they call that a babyled schedule, lol! Whatever, it works, we are sleeping and we are all pretty happy (excuse me while I go to knock on some wood).

Happy indeed!

We are at day 36 for anyone who was curious. 36 days! All the information you read on infant sleep training says it takes about 2 weeks, what planet are those people on- the planet where they still give their babies rum to help them sleep through the night (do not try that at home!). Honestly, I think that all of these programs need to give us the gory details because it is debilitating to only hear about the “winning successes” of some assholes that you don’t even know. Yes, I called those people assholes, that’s how angry it makes me, lol. I want to hear a story about how hard it was on one family and that it took them 8 weeks, because maybe that will make me feel better when we hit day 36. I think that they are setting you up to quit if they don’t paint a realistic picture. You are going to think oh well this isn’t working… the thing I found interesting about the sleepsense program’s follow along manual (where you chart your progress), was that there were 30 pages for charting 30 days of “progress.” So why is there space for 30 days if it takes 2 weeks. Yes they tell you in all of the programs that every baby is different and that two weeks is an average- well tell us the worst case scenario too, not just the two week situations.

I think I have finally (knock again on wood) solved the protesting at bedtime thing. A few weeks ago we were not letting Everly have a third nap, we just would let her stay up until it was time for the bedtime routine. Some nights this meant that she was already up for 3.5 hours before she went to bed. She is usually ready to sleep after 2 hours during the day, so that kind of gives you an idea about how tired she might be! I thought that her being more tired would make her fall asleep faster, yeah no, did not work that way. What I have found is that starting bedtime routine 1.5 hours after she has been away is the hot ticket. She is just tired enough at bedtime, not so overtired that she is wound up and can’t relax into a deep sleep. We stumbled upon this haphazardly when we went out for dinner and noticed she went to bed better, so the third nap is back and in full effect!

Speaking of naps, they are going great also (make this the third knock on wood!). We put her down and she falls asleep quickly. It’s all about timing for Everly, not so much about sticking to the same schedule. I wait until that 2 hour mark hits and just feed her and put her down and she sleeps. Usually it’s a 30 minute power nap, but these past 2 days she has had a couple 1 hour naps. It amazes me how little recharging she needs in order to be ready to go again!

Happy wake ups!

She is so close to being mobile! She does the commando Mowgli crawl (elbows on the floor, toes on the floor and legs and tummy in the air) and will push herself backwards. She gets on her knees and on her hands, but not always together in one coordinated movement, lol! I am not encouraging it right now, but her dad is and you can’t stop development, so it’s just going to happen.

Getting ready to take off!!!

We have also noticed that she has become a music lover. We bought her a little piano and xylaphone and maracas and she just plays with them all day long. As soon as she hears music her face lights up and she just gives ‘er, it’s too funny to watch (which you could HERE and HERE). We have been told that she will be a musician, I think it might be a tad early to plan our retirement on her rock star paychecks, but who knows, I did play a lot of RockBand and SingStar when I was pregnant, lol!

Linus

We had her 6 month well baby check up today! She was in the 90th percentile for her height and the 75th percentile for her weight, not to shabby baby! When she was born she was in the 25th percentile for her height and the 50th percentile for her weight, so she has done A LOT of growing. The doctor was very happy with her health and development so far, she was impressed by her skills thus far- every mother wants to hear that! So right now I am feeling pretty good about my job as a mom so far and I am so proud of Everly! To check your baby’s growth click here, that calculator is American though, am not sure if that makes a difference but it might, I think it’s handy regardless

Chubby monkey!

Hi There Everyone,

Great News I now have an official Facebook Fan Page!

Simply search for “Ashleigh Alexandra Louise Smith” on Facebook and Join my Fan Page today as that is where
photo’s and Video’s and News is being posted more regulary than at this blog.

So my advice is to join my facebook fan page and keep checking back here on a regular basis as the plan is to release
some exclusive photo’s and videos via this blog every now and again which will not appear on my facebook fan page and
then also put some stuff on Facebook which won’t appear here!

As you can see in the above video I sleep very well even when in noisy room’s, indeed
I reckon I could sleep through an earthquake I take after daddy like that : ) !

To finish for today here’s a quick video clip which daddy made by accident when he
was trying to take a picture of me on his mobile phone..

So Remeber to go to Facebook and search for “Ashleigh Alexandra Louise Smith” in the Manchester Network (England)
and join my Fanpage today!

Keep checking back as I have some important and amazing news coming very soon!

Hugs

Ashleigh

Developer: Coolgorilla

Version: 1.3

File Size: 6.6 MB

Category: Reference

Price: $0.99

-

Integration: 9/10

Stability: 9/10

Features: 8/10

Re-Use/Replay Value: 8/10

Overall Score: 8/10

With over 500 professionally translated words and phrases, this app is second to none. Whether if you’re traveling to Japan or just want to learn the basics of the Japanese language, this is the app for you. This app not only shows you the written English to Japanese translation, but it also brings out two more features including a professional text-to-speech voice translation along with “romaji” (a phonetic way of reading something).

When you open up this app, you are greeted with a list of categories containing the words and phrases you would need if you were learn the essentials and basics of the Japanese language. If you’re like me and you’re not actually visiting Japan, I would still consider buying this app if you ever wanted to learn a bit Japanese.

The developers did a great job integrating a phrasebook into an iPhone app. It comes with great features, and an easy-to-use interface. Each word or phrase is packed with a written Japanese text translation, a text-to-speech voice translation, and romaji. The text-to-speech audio capabilities are probably my favorite feature. Its as if an actual Japanese person with a Japanese accent is reading the word to you. Another great feature is the romaji. This is a great tool in learning how to pronounce something. For example, lets the use the word “hello”, in Japanese romaji that would be “konnichiwa”.

As far as the stability goes, this app is does a pretty good job. Since it’s just a small 6.6 megabytes, you won’t have to worry too much about it crashing. It hasn’t crashed on me before, and every thing in the app is fully functional.

The re-use value for this app is pretty high. Again, if you plan on visiting Japan you would probably want to use this app as a reference everywhere you go.

All in all, this app is a great phrasebook. I would highly recommend it to anyone who wants to learn the essentials and basics of the Japanese language

Tis the season, or so they say.

For me this year, it will be super stress, and it’s not starting off well.

Over the last three weeks I have spent hours at NYU Medical Center–first with Mistress then due to my home front.  And those trips will continue on throughout this joyous season.  Have you ever tried to navigate NYC at the height of the holiday season? Took me four hours to drive home today–45 minutes spent going from the corner of Park Ave and 34th St to the toll plaza at the Midtown Tunnel.

Tis the season though.

So here it is the night before Thanksgiving and all I want to do is disappear somewhere to the Caribbean and ride out the season there.

While juggling my girls in the city today while my wife was getting an MRI and follow with her neuro-oncologist I got a call from a cousin.  My mother put her Thanksgiving with his family on me–I have to drive her 2.5 hours or she won’t be having Thanksgiving.

Then there is Mistress who will be without family for the holiday–that’s on me too since I can’t take her with me or have her over (since as of 2:30 this afternoon I am not cooking).  And for that I get an I told you so.

And I can’t wait for Christmas to roll around either.  There will be chemo trips to the city on the week before Christmas and the week between Christmas and New Year.  Perfect times to navigate the wilds of Manhattan.

Way back–before I was in true holidays suck and I want to run away mode–Mistress was going to spend a couple of weeks (or more in CA) and I was going to take my girls to visit a friend in FL.  Looks like all of those plans have fallen apart–and the “I told you so’s” are already starting.

Can’t wait…

And hopefully 2010 is better.

One of the best 80’s songs, one of the best ever. Many thanks to Dieter for his wonderful songs and to Thomas for his great voice. many thanks for the memories. Long live Modern Talking !!!!

Modern Talking – You’re My Heart, You’re My Soul

It’s 11:30 at night. I’m tired. I have a bajillion things to do tomorrow. And I have nothing to write about.

But never fear, gentle readers. Having nothing to talk about has never before prevented me from going on and on, and you can rest assured that I shall live up to my reputation tonight.

See, it’s November 24. Day 24 of blogging every single day. In less than a week, if I keep it up, I will have met one of my goals– which was to blog every day in a month.

So lack of content is certainly not going to stop me now.

Therefore, having nothing of importance to tell you, I shall tell you a story from my childhood.

Once upon a time, I was a ten-year-old brat with a big mouth and a penchant for sticking my even bigger feet into it. I hadn’t quite learned the lesson that you can’t just fire off your mouth at anyone who walks by. My parents were very patient with me in this regard. In fact, joking around and being sarcastic was a part of my family’s daily conversation. Sometimes it’s hard for a kid to remember that just because you can say something to your mom or dad, who love you and know that you’re really not just a snotfaced kid asking for trouble, doesn’t mean that you can say that same thing to every adult.

I was at church camp for the week.

(Ah, the happy memories of church camp. A whole week without showering. Yum.)

(Don’t tell my mom I once went a whole week at church camp without showering.)

(Oh, Hi Mom!)

(While I’m confessing, I also lived off fried cheese balls and Three Musketeers bars, because camp food was gross.)

We were lined up outside the dining hall, waiting for the camp director to stop lecturing us about something so that we could go in for dinner. And I was hungry. And also a snotfaced kid.

So I said, under my breath, except not very under it, “Okay, we get it, hurry up.”

I know. I was such a brat. And of course he called me on it.

Except he didn’t exactly call me on it. What he did was pull me up in front of the entire group, tell them that I couldn’t keep my mouth under control, and inform them that for the rest of the week they were to call me Motormouth.

I know, right? That kind of thing could get me fired from my job.

(He didn’t work at the camp much longer, but I don’t think it had anything to do with the motormouth thing.)

(Although my dad was pretty mad.)

I know a lot of kids that would be absolutely devastated if someone said something like that to them. Kids who would feel the sting of mockery– finish out the week brokenhearted and never wanting to return to camp.

Ha.

See, what Mr. Mean Director Man didn’t know is that I have a sense of humor. (Which clearly he was lacking, I’m just saying).  Some things never change, you know? And twenty-odd years ago, when Mr. Mean Director Man told everyone to call me Motormouth, I thought it was funny. I didn’t care if they called me that. I kind of liked the attention. And I loved all the people telling me they thought he was mean and refusing to call me that.

I still love attention. And validation. I’m needy like that.

(Just ask my poor husband.)

So for a few days at camp, I was Motormouth.

And then I went home and took a shower (finally), and shook all the sand out of my suitcase onto the basement floor, and showed off my awesome soap carving of an unidentifiable object.

And then I was just Erin again.

Except I was Erin with a random summer camp story to share in the middle of the night twenty years later when I really needed something to write.

So now you know the truth.

Even as a kid, I had issues shutting up.

(What’s the blog equivalent of Motormouth? Motorfingers?)

This seems to be my year to see live shows!

I just bought a ticket today to go and see the Used with Three Days Grace on Monday. I’m so excited!

Although I suppose technically I didn’t buy the tickets, a friend of mine did and we’re going to go to the show together. I’m really happy that I was able to find someone with the same taste in music to go to the show with, and it was a totally spontaneous act to get the tickets. I have one friend in my hometown that I normally see all my concerts with, so I’m happy to have found someone here, where I spend the majority of my year!

In fact, I feel like I’ve done a great job this year of getting out and being social. It sounds silly to say, but I was far more reclusive last year. It was hard for me to go out and feel comfortable doing so. This year seems to be a different ball game! I feel like I’ve put more of myself out there, and that feels okay.

To add to that, the last month has been a tough one. Between a breakup, losing a job, fighting with my mother and surviving various assorted bits of drama, I feel like I can finally let go of the events of the last month. It helps that I went to talk it out with a counselor during a drop-in session today. It’s so helpful to have someone objective to hear your thoughts and question how you got to that conclusion. I (re)realized that I don’t give myself credit. Again, I’ve evolved so much over the last two and a half years since I’ve started school here, but there’s still more work to be done. There’s always more work to be done! But I can’t discount the distance I’ve come from where I’ve started.

It seems like something so simple, but it’s so easy for me to lose sight of all that I’ve accomplished and focus on the negative.

I’m so glad I took the time out of my day today to go talk to someone. I quite literally feel lighter!

Our name is something we are all given at birth and it accompanies us our whole lives. Some people are better at remembering names than others, but no matter who you are or what you do, there is nothing better at making a good second impression than remembering somebody’s name. I’m very fortunate, because I have always been very good at remembering the name of somebody new. It is also something I have worked at improving, and I’d like to share some tips I use to help you do the same.

I would say the most critical factor in remembering somebody’s name is making it important. Think about how YOU feel when somebody you’ve only met once or twice comes up to you and says YOUR name. Well, the same is true when you have made an effort and get somebody else’s name right. If it’s of importance to you to really remember their name, the likelihood of you doing so is much higher.

Don’t be in a hurry. When you first meet somebody new, don’t rush the introduction. As you shake their hand, observe their face and repeat their name back to them in your greeting, “Hi John, it’s nice to meet you.” As you look at their face, is there anything striking or particular about their appearance that can help you remember their name? Do they look like another John you know? If other friends are around you, introduce your new friend – repitition is a great tool to memory – “John, I’d like you to meet my friends. John, this is Mandy… Mandy, this is John…” and so forth.

Building upon repitition, if you are at an event with others, test your memory. Ask your friends questions, “Isn’t that John over there by the buffet?” The more you make a practice to remember, the better you will get.

If it’s a business event where you exchange cards, write some notes on the back: Tall, dark hair, big nose, has a Great Dane. In this case, I’d actually categorise this person as “Great Dane John” and picture him with his dog. The more images you can create in your mind associated with the person, the stronger the memory.

Try this simple exercise the next time you wish to remember names and faces. You’ll be surprised with just a little practice how much you’ll improve, AND how much it improves your memory as a whole.

This is a great added bonus to self-improvement, it is almost impossible to improve one area of your life without it improving other areas too! See how quickly all these little 1% improvements can add up to a whole new you very quickly indeed.

Have fun with this exercise and notice the change…

I have to say that the 30 day mark brough us some interesting changes. For one, Everly now makes very little fuss when she is put down to sleep. In fact she does this really cute little ritual of playing with her hippo and talking. I think she is telling the hippo a sleep time story. We keep the hippo in the crib, so she only gets him at sleep times- creating novelty we are! It is so nice to just lay her down and she falls asleep. This was our biggest problem and it began to be solved, how lucky were we!

Then she started a new routine of consistent night waking and staying up for 2 hours. Needless to say, I was quickly eager to kick this experience to the curb, as I didn’t think it was beneficial to anyone in our family or entire household. I read an article about trained night feeders and another about the possibility of backsliding to multiple feedings each night because of night feeds for babies who really didn’t need them… a 4:30 am feeding becomes 4:00, and then 3:30 and then 3:00 and so on and so on… this is what was happening to us. Then I read another article about morning rituals and we were guilty of a confusing morning ritual as well… gawd! All of this googling happened between the wee hours of 1:00 am and 3:00 am while I was waiting for her to fall back asleep on Sunday night.

When we started the sleep training I just fed Everly when she woke up in the middle of the night. The first week of training the middle of the night was around 5:00 am (yes I know that’s not the middle of the night but it felt like it, lol). The week after that it was 4:00 am, and then 3:00 am and then 2:00 am. Each time I fed her she would go back to sleep for another 3 or 4 hours. Initially when the feedings were very early morning another stretch of 3 or 4 hours was perfect. However, once she was waking at 2:00 am, one night feeding became two and she started staying awake and wanting to play. This was not a habit I wanted us to get into because if she didn’t need it before, why did she need it now… well I realized that she needed to eat to get back to sleep. So we decided to eliminate any feedings that occurred before 5:00 am (a baseline time we knew she could comfortably do). I read a lot about how to know when a baby is ready to eliminate night time feeds and it looks as though she qualifies by age, health and size; I also have an appointment with our doctor on Thursday to confirm these findings. 

So, to eliminate night waking we have begun the process of gradually eliminating the 5:00 am feeding. Last night I let her eat until she was drowsy again and it took 15 minutes, so tonight she eats for no more than 14 minutes. Apparently once you get to 5 minutes and under the baby will eliminate the feeding all on their own. The night before last was the first night we tried this and she protested, oh did she protest! I was up for 3 hours in the middle of the night waiting for her to fall back asleep. I just needed to know if it was possible- and it was! Last night she didn’t wake up until 5:00 am again, so I got a blissful 7 hours worth of sleep. I feel a bit drunk truth be told

Our morning ritual was another speed bump that we had to level. When she would want that 5:00 or 6:00 am feeding, I would bring her into bed and lay down while feeding her and of course we would fall asleep. Now how confusing must that have been for her. No wonder she would wake in the middle of the night and be upset. She had no idea that 2:00 am was not 5:00 am, she just knew she wanted to be fed to sleep in our bed and that sometimes it happens, so we had to cut that out. Yesterday and today I fed her on the couch and put her back in her crib and both times she slept until 8:00 am (longer than she does in our bed!). So now I feel super guilty of course as I was confusing the crap out of her because I wanted to get in a little more sleep. Well I have now learned to not underestimate her. I thought she wouldn’t go back to sleep if I put her back in her crib at that time of the morning. Turns out that if she is still tired she will sleep- what a novel idea. I promptly apologized to her. She can still come in to our bed in the morning for a little play time so we can cuddle, I don’t want to give that up, that is my favourite part of the day, it’s when the 3 of us feel most like a family to me

So here’s to having another night like last night, but with only 14 minutes of eating at 5:00 am!

Aqui les dejo un comercial de Telmex la compañia de telefonos de México, el cual te brinda un servicio de telefonia e internet, en fin, aqui les dejo este comercial que le gusta mucho a mi amiga Bebis! http://bebiss.wordpress.com 

When I left AP’s place on Sunday after the argument, I’d literally stormed out and sent him a text saying how unfair I felt he’d been. He replied and I sent a text back saying I’d call him later when the children were in bed because I didn’t want to get into a back and forth text argument … but we needed to clear the air so that we could talk properly the next day. This was very much a “breathe in deeply and rise above it all” action. I am trying to work hard on those because ultimately I know damned well that I am so very much in love with AP and that I am lucky enough that the man I’ve totally fallen for is in love with me too! The arguments that we have are never over anything “split-up-able” and ultimately we both are very much in love with each other. AP is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with and it is okay that occasionally things happen between us that bug each other. That’s life, especially when you put a Cancer female with an Aquarian male, but that is a whole other subject!!!

We both knew we needed to talk today, but events conspired against us! When my ex dropped the children off yesterday, he told me that our 9 year old son had been unwell all day, so I was half expecting him to still be unwell today and it didn’t surprise me when I woke him up and immediately knew he was NOT going to school! My son has ADHD and Aspergers (Autism Spectrum) so he is constantly on the go. When he gets ill, he literally just stops and I mean literally S-T-O-P-S. He’ll find himself a comfortable place, snuggle up and he won’t move unless he needs the toilet and even then he’ll ask me to carry him up the stairs because “his legs aren’t working!”

One tip I need to pass on here (sorry I digress) is to always take your kids temperatures when they are healthy so you KNOW what their healthy temperature is. My daughter and I are both naturally around 36°C when we are healthy and the normal guideline is 37.5° – but my son … normal for him is around 34°, so by the time he reaches what the experts consider “normal” he is already 3.5° hotter than his healthy temperature! I wouldn’t even really start to worry about my daughter until she reached around 38.5°C (with other symptoms) but for my son to reach 38.5° is a very poorly little boy indeed!

When my little man is ill, he gets a high temperature, he won’t eat anything, hardly drink unless you practically force him and he’ll barely speak to you as he drifts in and out of sleep/consciousness. Of course I had no choice but to keep him off school and stay home all day and it wasn’t exactly the best environment to have an adult conversation in, so talking to AP today was out. We both agree that when we need to have a serious conversation about something then it is best face to face.

I could have almost predicted that AP wouldn’t go down to work by himself after he found out I wasn’t going down. I could also have predicted that instead of running his own errands, he’s left them for tomorrow. I could have even more predicted that he’d go back to sleep after my 8.15am phone call to say my son wasn’t well and I wouldn’t be down to the workshop! I hadn’t predicted that when I spoke to him just before 2pm in the afternoon that he would still have been half asleep on his sofa!

I was a bit pissy I’ll admit – for so many different reasons, but I held onto it. It is NOT worth getting into an argument with AP about because as I’ve said before … fuck it if I could take a whole day to go back to bed and catch up on sleep then I bloody well would, so why should I begrudge somebody else – especially my boyfriend (who I know works VERY hard) the chance to do the same?

It really just isn’t worth making a big deal of … and if I know AP (which I do!) he’ll have known that I’d feel pissy about it anyway and is probably grateful for the fact that he didn’t get his head bitten off knowing that we still need to “talk” about the weekend.

At any rate my son made a recovery by late afternoon thanks to Calpol (Tylenol to my USA friends) that helped bring his temperature down and lots of hugs & snuggles on the sofa with his mum! I’d almost forgotten how nice it was to just SIT with my son, stroke his head and watch a movie together. It’s rare to get alone time with one of my children without the other, so I treasure it when it happens!

Aaaaaaaanyway back to the subject!!

AP had already thanked me for calling him last night to clear the air before going to bed – and I am glad I did too. It’s one of the reasons why I write all of this shit out because it gives me a chance to go RAAAA on my feelings without having to go RAAAA on my boyfriend! This is a very good thing!!

We voice chatted with headsets over MSN tonight (Monday eve) by which time I’d had enough time to calm down significantly from my previously-pissy-but-actually-slightly-very-jealous status of his extra naps today! There was absolutely NO POINT in being silly about him taking advantage of the chance to catch up on sleep because I know damned well I would if I could! LOL

It was a really good chat this evening and he said that he  really appreciated the way that I wasn’t being moody about the whole thing. I asked him point blank “do you know what upset me and what I want to talk to you about?” He replied yes straight away … and that is almost good enough for me. AP is not a stupid man – far from it and he isn’t blind either! In fact that is almost funny to say that because he is actually incredibly observant!

I think all I ever wanted really was a bit of acknowledgement that yes, he was acting like a bit of an ass and that he’ll try to be a bit more considerate of my feelings in the future. It’s all we can ask of each other really! Like I said, he isn’t stupid and he knows damned well why I was upset and why my feelings were hurt. Thanks to my blog and sitting up until late last night, I’ve got all of the crap and bad feeling out of my system so we can talk tomorrow and hopefully reach a point that I think we are finally getting to.

I know I am learning something from every single argument that we have – whether it’s that my boyfriend really appreciates a hug as a make-up gesture or that sometimes I just need to shut-the-fuck-up and say nothing …

and I miss him! We’ve not seen each other since I left just before 7pm on Sunday eve when I had to go get my kids …I really really miss him and need an AP hug right now xx

JLo falls onstage...then pops up and keeps it moving

Last night,Dick Clark and ABC television hosted the annual American Music Awards, where all kind of crazy and cool happenings went on,and Lady Gaga and Adam Lambert still stood out.

I like it how every year some new act feels the need to shock and push the limits of the public morals to the breaking point, and this year the winner for that category is Adam Lambert.

Adam,the runner-up for last seasons American Idol competition,decided to out do Katy Perry who kissed a girl, or at least had a hit record about it, by kissing a guy on stage.

And, as if that was not enough to get his point across, he then grabbed a male dancer, and had him kiss,…or do something like that, to his crotch. Many guys have done this on stage before,except with women.

I think the best one was that awards show on Spike TV hosted by Jamie Foxx,when he grabbed Halle Berry’s nice behind and laid a good kiss on her…remember that.

Jamee and Halle...very hotJamee hugs Halle...

Halle hugs Jamee,who hugs her back...

I know that was kind of different, but I think many will get my point. I became a bigger Jamie Foxx supporter after that one.

http://www.ballerstatus.com/2009/06/01/jamie-foxx-and-halle-berry-make-out-fondle-each-other-on-tv/

If you missed Adam’s act…we have the pictures here…

He showed up looking like this…

Edgy…or just another way to market his album…who knows.He is from San Diego, so good luck with that Adam…

Anyhow, here is a selection of the beautiful people who were there, and of course my favorites,Rhianna,Alicia Keyes, and all the other cute sexy and talented musical superstars….and oh yes, JLo fell,see image above article,watch video below before it gets deleted,and read the story in the link provided under the video…

http://www.examiner.com/x-6788-TV-Trends-Examiner~y2009m11d23-Jennifer-Lopez-falls-at-American-Music-Awards-with-video

…Oh yeah…as usual,like clockwork…Lady Gaga got down!…she is the most interesting performer out there currently, and whenever she performs…I simply can not take my eyes off of her,because of her performances.

She has way more concept than the rest of her fellow performers,and I can tell she is having a big influence on others stage shows. Good going Gaga….

Follow the JLo story here,their video may not be deleted very quickly because they got more pull…

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/11/22/jlo-falls-video-amas_n_367094.html

Friday night was AMAZING … I won’t give details but damn and WOW!

Then Saturday afternoon AP said something that was a “joke” in the way that he does … he makes little “funny” comments that are generally digs at me in a humerous way and most of the time I laugh them off because I know he’s joking and I see where the joke is coming from … but sometimes they go a little too far. We ended up having an argument.

I never got a chance to truly explain to AP how I felt because … well … ugh it’s so hard to explain exactly everything that happened. I wrote him a letter late last night – haven’t given it to him yet but it made it easier to write it all down that way …

AP,
I do love you so very much and it drives me insane when we get ourselves caught up in stupid pointless arguments. Neither of us enjoys that knife cutting atmosphere because ultimately we are very much in love, want to be together and make each other happy for the rest of our lives! I know that when an argument sparks, we both want nothing more than for things to just be back to how they were – all happy, loving and wonderful again, because we both know just how terrific things are between us for the other 99.99% of the time … I know you feel the same way!

All of this started for me on Saturday when you were making one jokey insulting comment after another and grinning at me, so I knew you were joking. We’d had an amazing Friday night and the atmosphere between us was good, so I was letting it go and doing my best not to let it bug me – BUT it was the point that you said to me “don’t be moody and get all wound up” that I actually GOT moody because it was you that had just sat there winding me up and you that had told me I was being moody! Before that I was just trying to let your comments slide past me.

The big red flashing beacon that I have going off in my head is that from my point of view … I don’t always feel that I’ve been given the chance to say everything that I need to say during/after an argument. When I speak, you often interrupt me, and even if you ask me a question, you start talking over me as soon as I start to answer. Even when you realise you are doing it and say you will let me speak, I don’t always get a chance to finish what I am trying to say before you stop me again.

Most of the time I agree it is a joint decision to let something drop and that it is in the best interest of the pair of us, but on Saturday it was you literally stopping me from speaking mid-sentence and deciding that it wasn’t going to develop into an argument, therefore we weren’t going to talk about it! You blatantly cut me off while I was speaking with a Shhhh that left a lot unsaid for me. Honestly it felt like I was there telling you that you’d hurt my feelings and you didn’t really give a crap because you wouldn’t even listen to me speak. It felt like you thought my opinion was worthless. I’m absolutely sure this isn’t true because I know you care about my feelings – but it’s how it felt at the time.

The “jokey digs” you were making at me on Saturday hurt my feelings plain and simple and the things you were saying eventually went from joking to hurtful. I’ve mentioned this to you before and asked you to sometimes please be a bit more wary of what you are saying when you make a “joke”. Your response was that it seems to depend on my mood, and yes, we both know I am capable of being hypersensitive and an emotional wreck, but it doesn’t mean my feelings are less worthy (not saying you think that) but surely if it IS dependent on my mood and you notice I’m a little down … then a hug, a kiss and an ego boost would surely be better than insulting me?

It also really bothered me when I said to you on Saturday that you’d hurt my feelings, your response was pretty much tough luck, it’s the way you are and I have to deal with it! I don’t think that is fair when you are doing/saying something that your partner says is hurtful. Yes I’ve made jokes too, but nowhere near the types of things that you say to me, and I never ever resort to personal digs or insults to provoke a reaction whether it is as a joke or not … and if I know something bothers you or upsets you then I do my damndest to avoid doing/saying it again. I’ve always said sorry straight away when I’ve realised I’ve accidentally hurt your feelings!

I brought this up in our last argument (the spotty bum comment followed by 6 hours of silence despite the fact I apologised as soon as you told me I’d hurt your feelings) and I also tried to tell you then that me saying you had a spotty bum was very different to the way you make jokes and digs at me … you demanded I gave you examples of the digs and I couldn’t come up with any on the spot. This is an example…

Trust me, I KNOW you don’t do it on purpose or out of any sense of maliciousness! I know you are joking and you don’t mean it … but sometimes … sometimes your joke comments are a little bit toooooo much and they hurt my feelings. I should be able to tell you without it ending up in an argument or without me being afraid to speak because we (you) have decided it is a closed subject.

Just before I left today and we started arguing, you were asking me over and over again to tell you whether you apologised for it … I said yes because obviously you did eventually apologise, and admittedly I muttered something under my breath that wasn’t very nice at that point. You half heard correctly and said something about how your apology obviously wasn’t within my timescales, and to be honest, no it wasn’t!

I’d told you quite a few times on Saturday that you’d hurt my feelings and it felt like you were refusing to even see that there was a problem (that’s how it *felt*) because you wouldn’t talk about it. I even pointed out that you hadn’t said sorry … you said simply “no, I haven’t!” What you did was to sit there for a bit until I started skinning up, then you came behind me on the sofa, giving me puppy dog eyes and being all cute hiding behind me, looking up at me, but it wasn’t until you’d managed to extract a half smile from me that you actually said sorry…

At one point I started to say “what makes it worse is that…” and that is as far as I got before you decided we weren’t going to argue about it by shhhing me and ending the conversation.

Ultimately, I feel that you could have said sorry or given me a hug and a kiss as soon as you realised that maybe your comments had gone a bit too far instead of telling me I was wound up and moody (because I wasn’t!!) … and yes, it did take quite a while before you actually said sorry to me after I’d told you up front that you’d hurt my feelings, and after everything you’d put me through after the spotty bum comment after I had apologised to you … it just made me feel like “my” hurt feelings were somehow less important than yours.

Look at it as along the same lines as when you asked me to hug you more after an argument instead of holding your hand as a peace offering. For me, holding hands is a gesture of closeness that leads to a hug … but you need to feel closer sooner. You told me this and as soon as you said it, I filed it away under “important” and I’ve tried to do that since then. I’ve made a point of coming for a hug or at the very least sitting in closer to you for the possibility of a hug sooner instead of stewing or brooding on something – whether it’s an argument or something that has come up.

There have been quite a few other times in the past where you’ve asked me not to say or do certain things … recently like the combat t-shirt for example. As soon as I realised that you had even a very slight problem with it … it was off my back and in the bin without any question whatsoever! I’m not going to carry on my life wearing something that makes my boyfriend feel shit! I feel like I’ve been putting a lot of effort into our relationship, trying to change things about myself that bug you or annoy you and I am simply asking for the same without it resulting in an argument.

It’s little things, and yes I’ve noticed that you’ve done little things for me too, which I appreciate a lot – and this is me asking begging you to please just sometimes especially if I’m tired and cranky then don’t wind me up with joke insults and tell me not to get wound up! It’s like a red flag to a bull, but more importantly it hurts my feelings.

I have so much going on and a ton of posts in draft form and have no idea when I will get to them so this week you might not read too much but I am sure I can still manage a picture or two.

For some strange reason we both have been so tired when we get in bed, for the past week, that our sex life has dwindled but I plan to change that tonight!

I sure hope everyone has a nice short week and a great Thanksgiving!

Clocks are such an integral part of life that it’s impossible to picture life without them since they’re essential to maintain a tally of the time thru our twenty-four hour day. From the time the first ever clocks were made, they have evolved over time and are now available in such a selection that it would make your head spin. The first ever alarm clock was granted a patent in 1877 and they have come a very long way since that time. What used to be a means to wake up on time now incorporates dazzling features like radios, twin alarms, CD players, programmable snooze buttons and hold your breath aromatherapy. It does not stop there the search is on to make the standard alarm clock even more complex and feature packed than it is.

Clocks also find their use in the home as timers in outdoor cooking while grilling or grilling to make sure that your favourite recipes turn out to be just right.

There are the conventional analog clocks. Analog desktop clocks and analog display clocks are also available. Desktop analog clocks are downloadable on to your PC screen. With analog alarm clocks and analog projection clocks many folks still prefer the analog clock display to the digital wall clock.

a recent trend is atomic clocks or radio frequency clocks. The naval atomic clock on-time atomic clock sync is free software that you can download to your computer. There are atomic wall clocks as well as atomic dual alarm clock radios. You also get atomic travel clocks.

Clock radios take you a stage further by playing radio stations. Water resistant shower clock radios, digital clock radios, CD alarm clocks, atomic clock radios and cassette recorder clock radios are now popular. CD clock radio shower let you sing along with them in the shower listening to music from multiple bands.

Digital clock radios let you studied the time more easily with their digital readout though some folks prefer the standard wind up travel alarm clock. The variety you may find is from digital alarm clocks and digital photograph alarm clock travel with these with an image of your dear one to awake to. A travel clock with nap timer is really convenient.

Mechanical goes automatic with battery operated clock parts and battery-powered clock mechanisms, saving you the fear of having to set the clock by hand. You also have a selection of battery-operated projection clocks ; battery-operated wall clocks and battery operated 6 digit clocks.

It is hard to find anyone who does not own an alarm clock. Most people can’t do without this ingenious invention that keeps them in time and helps them be on time, right from waking up in the morning to varied events throughout the day. To keep with the custom, there are a range of alarm clocks available. Those who travel often carry a travel alarm clock. For those that tend to be heavy sleepers or a little hard of hearing, they like loud alarm clocks. Recently the Zen alarm clock has gained popularity with its close to nature soothing sounds. Then there are the vibrating alarm clocks for the hearing impaired, and a massive choice of children alarm clocks.

The stately pendulum wall clock holds its place of distinction in numerous houses. The earliest pendulum regulator clocks date back to the 17th century. Some folk treasure their antique pendulum wall clocks while others prefer more modern designs like the Southwest pendulum clocks which are among the trendiest with their unique metal design and shapes.

There are interesting flying alarm clocks that can jump off your nightstand. These truly loud alarm clocks make you out of bed to stop the noise. The Timex alarm clock is quite popular and it comes with an am/fm clock radio and built in nature sounds. The Zen Alarm clocks come with pleasing resonant chimes like Tibetan bells. The chimes progress continuously, getting more and more frequent, waking you very gently instead of with the normal strident screech related to alarm clocks.

for people that are hearing-impaired or deaf or are visually challenged, the vibrating alarm clock is a convenient choice. Not only are they used for waking up, but also as reminders for timely medication.

For youngsters, there are unique youngsters alarm clocks in order that they can wake up happy in the morning. There are talking alarm clock that produce sounds like a cow mooing or a rooster crowing.

vibrating alarm clock

on saturday morning, dad and i ran a few errands so we would be all set for our big trip on sunday up to minnesota.  so after a quick stop in walmart for what we needed, we headed over to the library so i could have a few new books to read on the drive.  since we were over on that side of town, we went to the cascade library.  it was the first time i had ever been at this one.  we looked through some of the kids books and then dad pointed out the kids play area.  it was amazing.

it was in a large, circular room and had loads of things to do.  there were letters on the wall that had magnets on the back so i could move them anywhere i chose.  there was a little puppet stage with dozens of animal puppets, and a bit throne that was painted with jungle animals on it.  there was also a little “market” like in gram and pa’s basement.  plastic fruit, vegetables and even a chicken (featherless) were there to be played with.  not to mention all the books and puzzles that were in the room!

i played with a little girl named arianna and her little brother named luke (not my luke).  playing with the plastic food was the best.  i would grab a piece and show it to arianna, asking her what it was, and she would tell me that it was a pineapple, or a cucumber or an egg.  then we played with the letters and spelled out things.  she spelled her name and i spelled “gjkvcwauiih”  dad had picked out some books for me, and it was time to go, so we said goodbye, checked out the books and went home.  but dad told momma all about the special place at that library, so i home we get to go back soon!

Dearest David,

Today you turn eleven months old: only a month to go until you hit the big O-N-E.  Hasn’t this month been a rollercoaster?  I’m going to apologise now for not writing more about you this month, or taking more pictures, but in between the high-fever hallucinating and the throwing up, there hasn’t really been time.  (Swine flu.  Oh joy.  Incidentally, you ARE having the vaccine.)  Never mind, everything is OK when you have meringue.

I’m writing this as you sleep, during my precious work-time.   You are sleeping better in the day and at night because we’ve moved away from blankets and bought you a proper duvet.  The first night you slept under it you slept on your back all night with Donkey tucked in next to you: you haven’t done that since before you could roll over!  The fact that I could just take a photo of you asleep without waking you is testimony to the power of The Duvet.

This month, you mastered your walker, and then a few days ago you took a STEP!  And then another, and then another.  You’re not quite confident enough to walk on your own yet, but when you have your walker (or a chair, or your bead thing, or the high chair, or anything else the right height…) you can run!

We’ve had an interesting month with food, haven’t we?  Just after you turned ten months, you discovered chocolate buttons.  Daddy and I discovered that chocolate buttons are a brilliant bribe (sorry, reward).  This is good, because you seem to have hit the two-year-old fussy stage a year and a month early.  All the wonderful fruit and veg that you’ve been eating since you were six months old?  No thanks.  Pasta in a lovely spinach sauce provoked a tantrum.  Pears were even worse.  Why?  You ate pears last month.  At Rugrats and Half Pints yesterday you refused to even put cucumber in your mouth, never mind bite it.  It’s OK, though.  Daddy and I have come up with a solution: we’re just going to cover everything in hummous or yoghurt, then you won’t know that it’s vegetables.  That, or you can live on Mini Cheddars and chocolate buttons.  And meringues.

Your cousin Wilfred came to stay for a week this month and you had a great time together.  It’s the first time you’ve both been aware of each other, and it was lovely.  You’re (mostly) very gentle with him, although you do splash a little too much in the bath for him.  Watching you play peek-a-boo with him was one of the loveliest things I’ve ever seen.

Talking of baths: you adore them.  There have been days where you’ve had three or four in a day.  Not because you’re dirty (although meringue in the hair doesn’t help) but because you love them so much.  You can now request “bath!” and “splash!”, and there have been occasions when we’ve spent an hour in the bath, playing with ducks, bottles, the shower…  If you didn’t have to come out of the bath, I don’t think you would.

The way you play has changed so much this month.  You’ve figured out that stacking cups stack, and that the farmer in your farmhouse can slide down the chimney.  You’ve changed so quickly that you have next to no age-appropriate toys in the house, but your birthday and Christmas are only a month away, so you’ll have to hang on.  You love sliding the beads around on the bead thing, and you love your tambourine and maracas.  At Grandma and Grandpa’s house, you have a “phone” (a remote without the batteries in), which you pretend to talk to people on.  Talking of talking, you are learning new words almost every day, and you babble as though we can understand you.  You still have some very clear words, and yesterday you uttered your first phrase: “Get down?”.  I can’t wait to have a proper conversation with you.

Your understanding and social interaction are at a whole new level, too.  I asked you to sit down this morning, and you did as you were asked.  You hold your arms out and say “Up!” when you want to be picked up, and you frequently stop playing, give Daddy or I a hug, and then go back to whatever you were doing.  You also know when you’re being asked not to do something, and delight in disobeying us with a cheeky grin.  You’re visibly thinking more: we can almost hear the cogs whirring in your brain.

You’ve developed an unbreakable bond with Daddy now.  Well, you both laugh at fart jokes, find the word “poo” hillarious, and spend your time blowing raspberries at each other.  Maybe it’s just a man thing.  I love sitting back and watching you play together.

Son, I love you so much that I’ll almost think about forgiving you for throwing up in my car the other day.  (Yeah, thanks for that.)  You’re turning into a toddler so fast, and it’s amazing to think that this is your last newsletter before you turn one.  I miss my teeny-tiny baby, but you are so much fun now.  I’m not going to pretend that getting to this point hasn’t been hard, but now we’re here, it’s AWESOME, and I love you.

Lots of love,

Mummy and Daddy (who’s probably going to cry when he reads this)

sometimes, I wonder how pissed you are at me, and if you would ever really want to talk to me again.  Hmmmm….