So it wasn’t like this movie was bad. It just wasn’t very good. The 3rd in the Mummy series, the movie finds Rick and Evy in retirement and Alex doing the mummy finding. This mummy is Jet Li, who is an evil Chinese emperor who controls the five elements and a massive army. Basically, they have to stop him from taking over the world. In premise and execution, it’s not half bad. The problem is it isn’t half good.

First and foremost, the absence of Rachel Weisz tears at me. I realize it was her decision to not be in the movie. But really? They thought they could make the movie any good without her? Rachel Weisz makes the other two Mummy movies. Not that Maria Bello isn’t a good actress, but she isn’t Evy. She just isn’t. And that is incredibly obvious throughout the whole movie. Whoever told me Evy wasn’t in as much of this movie was obviously wrong.

Second, some people seem to think this was the best Mummy movie. I would like to meet these people and beat some sense into them. Have you seen The Mummy Returns? Obviously not. That one is the best. Hands down. And has Rachel Weisz. For real.

Third, the jokes and gags went a little over the top. Yetis playing football? Ew. That was almost as bad as the Rick/Evy scenes I had to skip because I couldn’t stand to watch them. Rachel Weisz. That’s all I have to say.

So, really, it wasn’t bad. It just wasn’t good. They should’ve stopped while they were ahead. And that made Close Encounters of the Third Kind the only good movie I watched tonight. Ah, well, I’ll just go back to my Chlark fanfiction world. Apparently, I like it there.

I’m not sure why I’m writing this review, exactly. Well, it’s not a review, per se. It’s more of a list of complaints about this movie. After all, a review of a movie that came out more than a year ago hardly seems timely. The major point is that this movie is a complete pile of smoldering crap. That sentence, and the image I hope to convey with it, has more to offer you than the movie does, if that says anything.

I’ll admit that even the first two (three if you count the Scorpion King) movies weren’t exactly of the highest caliber, nor were they terribly restrained by a little thing called “reality.” This movie, however, takes it to extremes.

I’m going to try and label them in order that they struck me.

A) Maria Bello playing Rachel Weisz. I know she’s not playing Rachel Weisz, she’s playing Evie O’Connell, but this is a pretty dumbass stretch. If Rachel Weisz doesn’t want to come back and make a 3rd Mummy movie, you write her character out of the damn script! It makes absolutely no sense to recast her part just for the Hel of it. It’s not like this is a series that actually has some sort of basis in history, or anything. She’s not playing Queen Elizabeth, she’s playing a fictional character! We’re not going to buy that somehow in the interim between the 2nd and 3rd movies, she’s aged to the point where she looks like a completely different person. And don’t even get me started on her dreadful interpretation of an English accent.

B) Brendan Fraser looks too young. If the movie is supposed to take place 13 years after the second one, maybe they should have, I don’t know, made Brendan Fraser look 13 years older than he did in the 2nd movie. Just a thought.

C) Speaking of accents… Unless I’m remembering things incorrectly, in the second movie, their son spoke with a decidedly English accent. Now all of a sudden, he speaks without the accent. Somehow, despite spending his first 10 years with an English accent, and, presumably spending the interim 13 years in England, surrounded by English people (and his father, the lone American), he somehow sheds the accent? Come on!

D) Curses, shmurses! Michelle Yeoh curses him and his entire army and the best curse she can come up with is, “I’m going to turn you into mud and then random fires will appear to bake you into clay?” Seriously? And on top of that, all his soldiers are turned into clay in battle-ready positions, which is really odd, considering that the Emperor was writhing around in pain when he was baked, but somehow his soldiers have more resolve than he does. Instead of running around yelling, “Oh shit! I’m on fire! You’re on fire! We’re all on fucking fire! What the fuck?” They just sit there and go, “Oh, it’ll pass. This is nothing.” like they have random clay-baking curses placed upon them every week.

E) Tomb Traps. I get that any movie dealing with ancient civilizations has to have a few traps in them, it’s practically a rule now. But, as they’re searching the tomb at the beginning, there’s an auto-reloading multi-crossbow trap. Sounds dangerous, sure, but this thing shoots down a narrow pathway between terracotta soldiers for about 30 feet. The characters all run down the pathway to get to the end before the arrows catch up with them. Have these people never heard of lateral movement? How about instead of running through the kill zone, you get the fuck out of the kill zone until it’s done?

F) Chinese is chinese, unless it’s in writing. So the evil General (another rule of these movies), demands that Evie O’Connell read the writing on “The Eye of Shangri-La”, in order to open up a gemstone (what the fuck?) and extract the unbaking elixir (again, what the fuck?). First of all, she’s English, grew up in Egypt, and spent most of her life studying Egyptian history and artifacts, but she’s somehow also a master of ancient Chinese? Possible, sure, but let’s also consider that he’s Chinese, and he needs her help. And then, a little but later, he speaks to the Emperor in Chinese, like it’s no big thing. Of course, maybe he’s just a functional illiterate.

G)Decoys are stupid. Because of the timing of Alex O’Connell in trying to save his parents, the elixir doesn’t get to the person in the sarcophagus, it get’s on the chariot driver. Problem solved, right? Only, it just so happens that the guy in the sarcophagus was a decoy and the chariot driver was the Emperor all along! How fucking lucky!

H) “Smack my ass!” Seriously? Yeah, that’s a line in the movie, spoken by John Hannah as he tells Brendan Fraser to extinguish the fire on his backside in the middle of the chase scene. Whose fucking 14-year-old conned their parents into letting them contribute a line?

I) Ski Planes. This is just a minor point, but as they decide to head to the Himalayas to cut off the Emperor on his way to finding Shangri-La, they’re flying in a plane that has skis tied under the wheels. This makes perfect sense for someone wanting to land on snowy ground, right?  Except, how in the crap does the plane take off with skis on the wheels? Maybe I’m selling them short. Maybe they had someone climb out in the middle of the flight and tie them on.

J) Worst laid plans… The Emperor has been baked in clay for 2000+ years. The entire goal once he is resurrected is to keep him away from Shangri-La. In 2000 years, what do they do to keep it hidden? Not a whole lot. Oh, they make some weird puzzle where he has to put a diamond on top of the tower to point the path to Shangri-La. Yeah, nice security. How about you blow the tower up?

K) Blow the tower up! Well, at least O’Connell and Co. are there to figure out that if you don’t want someone to find the way, maybe you should blow the tower up. They rig it with dynamite, and then they wait. That was their plan B. Umm, hello? How about Plan A? Blow it up, he can’t find Shangri-La, and you’re home in time for dinner. Naturally, not only does plan A fail, but so does Plan B, and they don’t have a plan C other than run away.

L)Yetis! The Chinese girl calls out for help in the mountains and some Yeti show up. That’s right, fucking Yeti. That says it all.

M) Mystic powers are for shit. The Emperor supposedly has power over the 5 elements, and he uses them in the Himalayan fight. He makes icicles spring up going towards O’Connell and his son. But not, you know, actually injure them. He gives them plenty of time to notice the icicles are coming towards them and run away from them. Dammit! Just have some icicles come up through their feet and you’ll be immortal in time for dinner.

N) Shangri-La! It’s ridiculous. At an altitude of 20-25 thousand feet, there’s a massive, lush, green paradise just sitting there that no one ever knew about. You’re telling me that no one ever noticed it as air flight is becoming popular? And on top of that, I’m pretty sure green parts of nature can’t survive that kind of climate.

O) Immortality is overrated. The whole theme of protecting Shangri-La is that it houses the Pool of Immortality, and the Emperor must not find it, or all is lost. And then he finds it, takes a quick bath in it, and all is lost. Except, not at all. Seriously! If you’re going to tell me that a specific scenario is the be-all, end-all, then make it the fucking be-all, end-all. Don’t give me the old, “Well, I’ve got this hidden card up my sleeve, just in case.” I just wanted to movie to end at that point, it didn’t matter how.

In a nutshell, there’s 15 points for why this movie is terrible. There were actually a lot more, but I didn’t decide to start writing this until a little more than an hour into the movie, so the chances are that I forgot a lot of my complaints when it came time to write them. The alternative would have been to watch the movie again to make sure I got them all. I’m all for being thorough, but I’m not crazy.

Michael Fleming – Variety.com

Veteran visual effects supervisor Matthew Gratzner is attached to make his directorial debut on “UFO,” the feature adaptation of the ’70s TV series.

Gratzner was visual effects supervisor on the upcoming Martin Scorsese-directed “Shutter Island,” and his vfx resume includes “The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor,” “Hancock,” “Iron Man” and “Alien: Resurrection.”

The film was optioned from rights holder ITV Global by the Robert Evans Co., where producers Evans, Henri Kessler and Avi Haas will be joined by Gratzner’s New Deal Studios to move the project forward.

A script has been written by Ryan Gaudet and Joseph Kanarek. Gratzner’s studio has begun developing concept art and pre-visualizations; after they’re completed, the picture will be shopped for financing.

Like the Gerry Anderson series, the film will revolve around Shado (Supreme Headquarters Alien Defense Organization), a secret military operation hidden beneath a Hollywood studio, whose operatives battle an alien race that has been kidnapping and killing humans for decades and using the body parts.

“The story, characters and situations Mr. Anderson created in ‘UFO’ are timeless and engaging,” Gratzner said. “My vision is to utilize visual effects as a supportive storytelling device that draws audiences into this universe.”

The Mummy: Tomb of The Dragon Emperor

ขนบหนังผจญภัยยังไม่มีอะไรใหม่ที่ท้าทาย

โดยนิวัต พุทธประสาท

สวัสดีครับท่านผู้อ่าน Hamberger ผมได้รับมอบหมายให้ทำหน้าที่วิจารณ์หนังที่เข้าโรง ดังนั้นการทำงานแบบนี้ต้องแข่งกับเวลาพอสมควร แล้วกว่าบทความจะคืบคลานไปลงหนังสือ หนังบางเรื่องอาจจะลาโรงไปแล้วบ้าง แต่ผมหวังว่าบทวิจารณ์ของผมนั้นจะมีค่าพอให้ท่านได้อ่านเป็นน้ำจิ้มก่อนท่านจะไปซื้อดีวีดีมาชมในภายหลัง และอีกประเด็นหนึ่งผมมีความคิดว่าผมจะไม่เพียงวิจารณ์ตัวหนังเท่านั้น ทว่าผมจะเขียนถึงโรงหนังที่ผมได้ตระเวณไปดูว่ามีบริการที่ดีเพียงไร สภาพโรงเป็นเช่นไร มีระบบภาพและเสียงที่เยี่ยมแค่ไหน สมกับราคาตั๋วที่ต้องจ่ายไปหรือไม่ ซึ่งผมเชื่อว่าข้อมูลต่าง ๆ ที่ท่านผู้อ่านได้รับ จะได้นำไปสู่การตัดสินใจว่าจะเลือกโรงหนังโรงใดที่มีบริการที่คุ้มค่าที่สุด

สำหรับฉบับนี้ผมขอประเดิมด้วยภาพยนตร์ฟอร์มยักษ์เรื่อง The Mummy: Tomb of The Dragon Emperor ซึ่งเป็นตอนที่สามของการผจญภัยต่อสู้กับการฟื้นคืนชีพของมัมมี่ หนังเรื่องนี้ทั้งสามตอนไม่ได้เกี่ยวเนื่องถึงกันทั้งหมด มีเพียงตัวละครเกือบจะชุดเดิมกลับมาเล่นเท่านั้น ซึ่งน่าเสียดายที่บทของเอเวลีน นางเอกของเรื่องไม่ได้ราเชล ไวส์ กลับมาเล่น เพราะว่าไปแล้วสองภาคที่ผ่านมาบทของราเชลไวส์นั้นเด่นเหลือเกิน ราเชล ไวส์เป็นนักแสดงหญิงที่เล่นหนังได้หลายบทบาท การมาเล่นบทบู๊ตลกในเดอะมัมมี่สองตอนที่แล้วทำให้หนังดูดีขึ้นเป็นกอง แต่เมื่อต้องมาเปลี่ยนนางเอกกลางคันแบบนี้คนชมก็ต้องทำใจกันพอสมควร

The Mummy: Tomb of The Dragon Emperor เปิดเรื่องด้วยการย้อนกลับไปเมื่อ 2,000 ปี ก่อนคริสตกาล สมัยที่จีนยังแตกเป็นก๊ก การก่อสร้างกำแพงเมืองจีน และการรวมก๊กต่าง ๆ ให้เป็นหนึ่ง สงคราม การสู้รบ อำนาจของจักรพรรดิที่ยิ่งใหญ่แต่โหดเหี้ยม ไร้ความปราณี ไร้รัก ไร้มิตร รวมถึงการค้นหาความเป็นอมตะไม่ว่าด้วยทางการแพทย์ จนถึงคุณไสยเวทมนตร์ ก่อนจะจบลงด้วยการถูกสาป ให้กลายเป็นหินพร้อมกองทัพ

เดอะมัมมี่ ดำเนินเรื่องตามแนวทางของหนังผจญภัย (Adventure) อย่างไม่ขาดตกบกพร่อง เริ่มตั้งแต่การเสาะแสวงหาสุสานโบราณของจักรพรรดิ เมื่อพบสุสานแล้วการเข้าไปในสุสานซึ่งเต็มไปด้วยกับดักนานาชนิด รวมถึงกลไกต่าง ๆ ที่จะคร่าชีวิตผู้ค้นหาให้วายชนม์ รวมถึงการปลุกให้จักรพรรดิผู้ยิ่งใหญ่กลับมามีชีวิตอีกครั้งเพื่อผลทางการเมือง แต่หาลืมไปว่าโลกยุคใหม่และโลกยุคเก่า อำนาจที่มีนั้นไม่สมดุลย์กัน ความขัดแย้งของตัวละครทั้งฝ่ายขาวฝ่ายดำ นำพาให้เรื่องดำเนินไปสู่จุดไคลแมกซ์ที่คนดูต่างก็รู้ว่าหนังต้องเดินไปสู่จุดจบอย่างไร โดยที่คนดูจะพึงพอใจอย่างที่สุด

สิ่งที่ดีที่สุดของหนังเรื่องนี้ก็คือหนังเต็มไปด้วยอารมณ์ขัน ฉากต่อสู้ที่ดุเดือดน่าตื่นเต้น เอฟเฟ็คที่สมบูรณ์แบบ การตัดต่อที่กระชับ และเล่าเรื่องไม่ซับซ้อน ส่วนผู้ร้ายในเรื่องก็หาทางออกให้ไปถ่ายและฉายในจีนได้ โดยการโยนฝ่ายผู้ร้ายให้เป็นพวกก๊กมินตั๋น ไม่ใช่กองทัพแดงของประธานเหมา นี่คือเทคนิคที่เหลือร้ายของการแก้ปัญหาเรื่องบทหนัง เพื่อไม่ให้กระทบต่อปัญหาทางการเมือง ผมยอมรับว่าการเขียนบทหนังยังมีส่วนมาก ๆ ที่ทำให้เรื่องราวที่กระจัดกระจายนำไปสู่องก์เดียวกัน ซึ่งจุดนี้คนเขียนบทหนังของฮอลลีวู๊ดมีความถนัด มีความเก่งกล้า ตัวเรื่องก็มิได้หลุดออกจากแกนกลาง หนังไม่ออกทะเลเหมือนหนังบู๊บางเรื่อง พูดให้ง่ายคือแกนเรื่องที่แข็งแรง ซับพล๊อตที่ไม่หละหลวมจนเกินไป จึงทำให้หนังดูสนุกไม่น่าเบื่อ และคนดูหนังไม่ต้องคิดอะไรมาก เมื่อชมจบก็จบกันไป ไม่ต้องนำประเด็นไหนมาถกเถียงให้เกิดปัญญา เพราะหนังได้สรุปรวบยอดเรื่องราวความดีความเลวเอาไว้แล้ว ฮอลลีวู๊ดทำหนังเรื่องนี้เพื่อความบันเทิง และมันได้บรรลุถึงผลนั้นอย่างไม่ต้องสงสัย

ส่วนข้อเสียของหนังเรื่องนี้ก็คือหลาย ๆ ฉากในหนังคนดูคาดเดาเหตุการณ์ได้ไม่ยาก ทำให้คนดูไม่ต้องเอาใจช่วยว่าตัวละครจะรอดจากภัยร้ายได้หรือไม่ คนดูรู้อยู่แล้วว่าพระเอกนางเอกจะไม่ตาย รวมถึงฝ่ายคนดีส่วนใหญ่ต้องรอด อย่างตอนที่ริค โอคอนเนลล์ (เบรนแดน เฟรเซอร์) ถูกจักรพรรดิ (เจ็ต ลี) เอามีดเสียบปางตาย คนดูแทบไม่ต้องลุ้นเลยว่าพระเอกจะตายหรือไม่ แถมคนดูยังนึกได้ไม่ยากว่า แค่พาไปกินน้ำศักดิ์สิทธิ์เขาก็จะหายจากอาการบาดเจ็บแล้ว ซึ่งตัวเรื่องแบบนี้หนังอย่างอินเดียนาโจนส์ใช้อยู่บ่อย ๆ กลายเป็นหนังที่ใส่แอคชั่นรีเพลย์ พระเอกไม่มีวันตาย และหาทางเอาชนะฝ่ายอธรรมในตอนจบได้อย่างราบคาบ ซึ่งจุดนี้ผมมองว่าหนังยังไม่ก้าวพ้นจากขนบเดิม ซึ่งน่าเบื่อ เมื่อจับทางได้จะดูหนังสนุกน้อยลง

ผมไปชมหนังเรื่องนี้ที่โรงหนัง SF Cinema เดอะมอลล์ท่าพระ โรงที่ห้า รอบหนึ่งทุ่มราคาตั๋ว 100 บาท โรงหนังแห่งนี้ถือโอกาสปรับปรุงโรงตอนที่เดอะมอลล์ท่าพระปิดซ่อม ทำให้โรงหนังยังอยู่ในสภาพใหม่ แม้จะไปดูในเวลาไพร์มไทม์แต่คนก็ไม่เยอะนัก ทำให้ไม่ต้องเบียดเสียดผู้คนกันในโรง เก้าอี้อยู่ในสภาพสมบูรณ์ไม่เล็กหรือใหญ่เกินไป ส่วนจอหนังกว้างใหญ่ แต่ภาพยังไม่คมชัดนักแต่ถือว่ายอมรับได้อยู่ในมาตรฐานที่ดี ส่วนจุดเด่นของโรงอยู่ที่ระบบเสียงนั่นเอง ระบบเสียงที่ SF ก่อนปรับปรุงโรงก็ดีอยู่แล้ว เสียงกลางซึ่งเป็นบทสนทนาชัดเจนไม่แตกพุ่ง เซอร์ราวด์รอบทิศจับทิศทางของเสียงได้สมบูรณ์ ส่วนเสียงต่ำก็แสดงศักยภาพได้เยี่ยมทำให้ชมฉากระเบิดได้มันส์สะใจ ก่อนเข้าโรงหนังระบบรักษาความปลดภัยที่ดี มีการตรวจกระเป๋า แม้แต่ติดแฮมเบอร์เกอร์เข้าไปประทังความหิวมื้อค่ำยังต้องฝากเอาไว้หน้าประตู (ฮา)

ท่านที่จะดูหนังเรื่องนี้เอาความสนุกสนานความบันเทิงไม่ผิดหวัง เป็นหนังบู๊ผจญภัยที่ครบถ้วนทุกรส หนังเรื่องนี้ได้สามดาว จากการเป็นหนังที่นำเสนอความบันเทิงล้วน ๆ ไม่มีอื่นใด

จำนวนดาว ***

So lately, I have found I haven’t found many movies that have met my expectations. I have found a lot of movies that are 2 and 3 stars but not many 4 or 5. So to save myself the agony of writing a long review for each of these semi decent movies. I decided I would make a list of the movies with a highlight of their rating and what I thought of them.. you know why I deemed them unworthy of their own separate postings.

So here they are:

Henry Poole is Here-2 stars. BORING. Could have been much better.

Step Brothers-2 stars. Had a few laughs. A lot of the same old crap. Come on Will think of something new.

Max Payne-2 1/2.My expectations were very high for this movie. Mark, you let me down…

Mirrors-2 stars. Odd. Not too scary. A couple of good moments but that’s about it.

Righteous Kill-2 1/2 stars. How can you go wrong with that cast??? The script blew the movie it was way to obvious.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Empire-2 1/2. Some cool effects. The Story was kinda weak..

The House Bunny-3 1/2 stars. pretty funny.  some parts were dumb.

Burn After Reading-1 1/2 stars. How about we change the name of the movie to Burn After Watching? The previews made the movie look so good too and the cast I mean WTF.

My Best Friend’s Girl Friend-3 1/2.  Offensive at times if you let it. I laughed a lot. I few snags in the story for me.

Tyler Perry’s The Family that Preys-3 stars. had a lot of emotions this movie did. I did not like how all of the story went but besides that it was a good flick.

Igor-3 1/2 stars. Cute movie. A bit different and not as kid friendly as I was thinking but still liked it and it made me laugh.

Originally published at the Dire Cafe August 23, 2008

Starring:
Brendan Fraser … Rick O’Connell
Jet Li … Emperor Han
Maria Bello … Evelyn O’Connell
John Hannah … Jonathan Carnahan
Michelle Yeoh … Zi Juan
Luke Ford … Alex O’Connell
Isabella Leong … Lin

To say that I was shocked that The Mummy made it to the dollar theater before “The Dark Knight” is somewhat of an understatement. Nevertheless it was on our list of “Must-go-see-in-the-theater” so off we went. V.S. and P.I.T.s 1, 2, & 3 went to see the latest Mummy flick. Mrs. V.S. opted out of this one.

It’s 1946, Rick and Eve worked for the government as spies during WWII. They’ve retired from the “Sporting Life” and are both loathe to admit to each other that they miss it.

Little Alex has grown up and is following in his parent’s footsteps. Johnathan is trying to get as far away from mummies as possible.

It was nice to see an expansion on the franchise out of Egypt. The China setting isn’t the first place that I’d go when thinking of mummies but it worked.

Overall rating:
6 pointed ears ( out of 8 )

V.S.: 1 ear, This was an ok flick. It would’ve been much better had Rachel Weisz come back as Evelyn. Don’t get me wrong Maria Bello did a bang up job but the chemistry was just off between her and Brandon Fraiser.

The Yeti seemed to be too much of a Deux Ex Machina for my tastes.

PIT #1: 1 ear, Cool use of the Terra Cotto soldiers actually found in China. Spent a good portion of the movie trying to remember that Michelle Yeoh was ‘Wai Linn’ in Tomorrow Never Dies

PIT #2: 2 ears, Great movie. Did find it hard to believe that Rick and Eve didn’t look like they had aged that much.

PIT #3: 2 ears, Kissing scenes at an acceptable minimum. The explosions could’ve been bigger. He would have preferred to see the plane actually fall off the mountainside.

Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, The
★ / ★★★★

When I read this film’s scathing reviews (to say the least), I thought people were just being way too hard on it so I still wanted to watch it. Despite people’s advice (and insistence) to stay as far away from this movie as possible, I still hoped that I would like it even just a little bit because I love the first two “Mummy” installments (they reminded me of the spirit of the “Indiana Jones” franchise). This time around, I’d have to agree with everyone else; this is as bad as they say it is. First of all, they replaced my favorite actor from the franchise: Rachel Weisz. I thought she was perfect as Evelyn O’Connell because she excels at being bookish-smart and rarely depending on chance in order to reach some sort of success. It means that she’s perfect for Brendan Fraser’s character, Rick O’Connell, because he’s too goofy for his own good (which often leads him to trouble) and only depends on luck in order to get the upper hand. Maria Bello, Weisz’s replacement, interprets the character so differently, I felt like she was Rick O’Connell’s unwelcome second wife. She’s one dimensional, not that strong, and lacks charisma. Not to mention she doesn’t have chemistry with Frasier. Moreover, even though Luke Ford as Alex O’Connell is nice to look at, I didn’t find him as witty and as plucky as the younger Alex O’Connell (Freddie Boath) back in “The Mummy Returns.” In fact, I found Ford as interesting as an inert plank leaning against a wall. Brendar Frasier, despite his best efforts and fun energy, was sidelined. To me, the focus of this film was the conflict between Michelle Yeoh and Jet Li’s characters. Not only did the camera spend too much time on them (even though I really liked their martial arts scenes), the story is really about a thousand year old thirst for power and revenge. And somehow, Frasier and the gang managed to get tangled in its maelstrom. As for the film’s pacing, it didn’t really get interesting up until the forty-minute mark. In fact, I was kind of getting sleepy which is not a good sign because I love action-adventure films. I love watching characters travel from one place to another, seeing exotic locales, and winning at the end of the day. In this film, I didn’t really care about the characters because I never thought they were in any real danger. I literally rolled my eyes from when the Yetis appeared up until the end. Just when I thought that’s the worst of it, a dragon appeared… and then a giant monster that could bring down planes. In a nutshell, it just got too ridiculous. As much as I love the “Mummy” franchise, I’d have to urge everyone to skip this one and see something else–something that truly captures how it’s like to go on an adventure.

Ok, so it’s not a perfect movie; but it’s still good entertainment.  The jokes aren’t that funny in this third installment but the effects and pacing is good enough.  Brendan Fraser still has ‘IT” in spite of it’s been seven long years, yes 7!, since the last Mummy sequel.  Maria Bello stepped in for Rachel Weisz, it’s not easy to fill Rachel’s shoes, Maria did nicely although she looked a bit too mature for baby face Brendan.  Also I have to add that Jet Li and Michelle Yeoh brought some action and unique appeal to this film.  All in all, it’s worth watching on the big screen and since it’s a no-brainer movie, it allows you to just sit back and enjoy the show.

Premise:  Rick O’Connell (Brendan Fraser) is back in the third installment of “The Mummy” series.  Joining his now college-age son Alex, Rick and his wife Evelyn battle a reincarnated Emperor of China (Jet Li) with the ability to control the elements.  With the help of a young girl and her mother, the O’Connell family race against the clock in search of the mythical realm of Shangri-la to intercept the powerful emperor and stab him/it through the heart with a cursed dagger before he/it is able to raise his undead army to rule the world.

Analysis:  Well, at least it was better than Indiana Jones/Crystal Skull, but not by much unfortunately.  My wife and I both agree that the storyline had a good premise, but the characters are starting to feel old and worn upon this third installment, and surprisingly the actress playing the old Evie (Rachel Weisz) did not make an appearance in the third movie, played instead by a wholly unknown (to me) actress named Maria Bello.  While she was “OK” she did not bring the same excitement and fun to the character as Ms. Weisz, so that was a big distraction.

Overall, the story gets bogged down in sentimentality and is light on action in my opinion.   The viewer is constantly bombarded with scenes of what appears to be teen angst from the Alex character, (puppy love with the young Chinese girl, anger and rebellion against his parents), and the struggle these parents have accepting their son as the young man that he is.  I can understand what they were going for her, but for the most part, when I watch a “Mummy” movie, I really am not looking for deep character portrayals… but rather shoot-em-up, blow-em-up action. 

While there is some action in the movie, it is for the most part minimized to the story of internal struggles that are portrayed.  The final part of the movie, what would usually be the “epic” battle, seems almost contrived as it is a mirroring of the first two “epic” battles, (ie. a huge battle going on outside, while the heroes and main villain battle in a separate location; upon defeating the villain, the “bad-guys” army disappears, and there is much celebration by the victors).  This is the THIRD time the EXACT same scenario plays out, and it loses some of its “epicness” and is a bit of a disappointing end.

My Netflix Rating:   3 out of 5 stars

Termina el 2008 y aunque faltan algunas semanas para ese fin, creo poder aventurarme a definir para mi gusto las tres mejores películas y la tres peores de acuerdo a la expectativa que crearon por sus estrenos.

Y también ciertos colados que entraron como algunas de las mejores películas sin presentar esa expectación que las que a continuación mencionare.

Pueden estar de acuerdo o no, pero lo que si puedo asegurar es que es mi BLOG y pongo lo que yo quiera, así que se aguantan. (jajajajajaajajajaja It’s Joke!)

Lo mejor:

Sin lugar a dudas una película que fue inevitable ver por el morbo generado con la muerte Heath Ledger previo a su estreno, fue The Dark Knight (2008) o El caballero de la noche traducida para la versión latinoamericana.

En ésta segunda presentación termino de entender la idea que quiere presentarnos el director Christopher Nolan, en una versión más apegada al comic y sin tantos efectos digitales.

Pixar la volvió hacer éste año de nuevo y desde Los Increíbles no se volvía a presentar otra película que gustara a chicos y grandes. WALL·E (2008) de Andrew Stanton es un personaje que deja encantados a todos, un merito importante es que hay muy pocos diálogos y todo está basado en expresiones, emociones y sentimientos: de un par de robots!!!

Y por último mi preferida, la que a mi gusto fue una de las mejores por sus actuaciones y la crudeza con la que fue refleja ésta biografía escrita y diriga por Dito Montiel: A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints (Titulada al español latinoamericano Tus santos y tus demonios).

Algo de lo que me impactó es que los actores principales que dan la vida al mismo director como Shia LaBeouf (Dito adolescente) y Robert Downey Jr. (Dito adulto) protagonizaron también películas de alto presupuesto (Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull y Iron Man respectivamente) y pude ver en otra faceta en sus actuaciones.

Lo peor:

AH!! este 2008 no se salvaron grandes producciones del cual se tenían muchas expectativas y solo fueron rotundos churros y lo peor de este año.
(Se que hay películas que estuvieron para el olvido, pero éstas en especial se esperaba mucho).

La primera con la que quiero comenzar es con 10,000 BC de altísimo presupuesto, efectos especiales y la dirección de Roland Emmerich de éxitos como: Independece Day, Godzilla, The Patriot, Day After Tomorrow por mencionar algunos.

El filme está fuera de contexto vista desde el punto de histórico y a la vez muy desperdiciado el escenario y la ambientación para un guión o historia de ésta. Creo que seguir poniendo héroes aún así hace 10,000 años sigue siendo una idea errónea de estos gringos.

Otra película que es de lo peor es The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor , tal vez la peor de todas y una apresurada idea comercial de promocionar los juegos olímpicos.

Ya desde un inicio momias en china está descabellada la idea (que ni siquiera eran momias sino soldados de piedra) y tan así que Brendan Fraser pedía a gritos que estuviera su pareja Rachel West para sentirse pleno.
Jet Li y Michelle Yeoh (Tigre y el dragon) fueron personajes completamente desperdiciados, creo que muy poco el rostro de Jet Li fue visto y lo demás era la dizque momia digitalizada.

Y otra que para mi fue una decepción y me duele decirlo por la expectativa que me hice fue The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian. Por una parte ya se ve hermosísima una de las protagonistas que hace el papel de Susan: Anna Popplewell el cual me rehusaba a tomar esta decisión.

Pero por otra parte la visión del director o de la productor de querer copiar la formula del Señor de los anillo o Harry Potter hizo que tomara esta decisión. Y no miento al asemejarse los Teasers de las películas, véanlo ustedes mismos.

Los inesperados

Ésta mención es para películas que no se esperaba mucho y fueron un éxito presentando nuevas propuestas y fueron bien hechas.

Una de la cual ya mencione en algún otro tema y fue Arráncame la vida, pueden visitar la entrada para saber de ella.

Otra que mostró algo nuevo y diferente fue Cloverfield de Matt Reeves, de la producción Bad Robots creadores de la exitosa serie Lost entregan una propuesta interesante en mostrar desde una nueva perspectiva de la clásica destrucción de la gran Manzana NY por un monstruo; mas real o mas viseral, sin héroes, solo personas llevadas a realizar acciones por circunstancias reales.

Excelente opción que estoy seguro presentará alguna secuela del monstruo de Cloverfield.

En fin, lo que para mi fue lo mejor y lo peor del 2008.

Comentario.- La pelicula A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints fue hecha en el 2006, fue presentada en Mexico hasta éste año.

Well its not like the Mummy Coaster Ride at Universal but The Mummy – Tomb of the Dragon Emperor is a walk through ride that looks cool. La Ronde says it will be only present for the 2009 season- but I have a feeling we may see a second life for the Mummy.

Inspired by the successful blockbuster film with the same name, The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, live! is an approximately three hundred square meter walk-through in which visitors will encounter many characters in a novel and extraordinary atmosphere full of surprises, thrills and mystery. La Ronde will become the second theme park in the world to host this attraction.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, live! will be open to La Ronde visitors for a limited time—June 19 to September 7, 2009, only—before it heads for another theme park on its world tour. La Ronde recently reached an agreement to that effect with New York based Sudden Impact Entertainment Company (SIEC), a producer that works very closely with Universal Studios.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, live! was inaugurated a few weeks ago in Australia. It can accommodate between 500 and 700 people an hour. Sudden Impact!’s Chairman & CEO, Lynton V. Harris, who is described as the “Scare Master,” created the experience. He has transformed the haunted house concept to produce spectacular interactive experiences and attractions, including The Mummy live! and The Mummy Returns live! have toured all over the world.

In the film The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, the third instalment of the popular series, the action takes place in Asia. Brendan Fraser’s character, Rick O’Connell, wins the battle with Emperor Han, this time with the help of Rick’s son, Alex. An irony of fate is that the film was partially shot in Montréal.

“The fact that La Ronde recently reached an agreement with SIEC and indirectly with Universal confirms that the park has become one of international calibre over the last few years,” its president, Marc Tremblay, points out. “The groundbreaking interactive experience of The Mummy is a huge addition to the increasingly amazing and diverse range of entertainment we provide,” he adds.

Be sure you don’t miss The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, live! by getting your 2009 season pass, already on sale at La Ronde at the reduced price of $83 (individual). Family season passes, for four and six people, are also available. They are always an excellent gift idea as the holiday season approaches.

La Ronde Web Site

I was sitting around thinking to myself, “I’m bored… I don’t feel like gaming…  Not really tired yet… I know, a movie!”

So, I grab the one of top of the pile and put it in the DVD player.  I take a deep breath and settle in for an “action-packed thrill-ride”  **note the double hyphens, this should have tipped me off**

What followed wasn’t pretty.  Is it just me?  Am I going crazy?  And how does Brendan Fraser STILL get work?

Needless to say I lasted a whopping 11:16 into the movie before calling it quits.  I’m not reviewing it so much as pleading with you – Keep your sanity, stay away from this horror!!!

Don’t worry, I’ll suffer through it and I might even mutter about it again, IF my opinion changes after a full viewing.  As for tonight… nope, just not going to do it.  Onward… maybe I’ll watch a little Chuck.  Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, that’s the ticket (yeah, I went there, sorry).

Everyone has been warning me about this film. The bad reviews and the film’s performance, or rather lack thereof,  at the box office was more than an indication as to how bad it is. But as always I wanted to see for myself. Prepared for the worst I was still horribly disappointed.

The Mummy – Tomb of the Dragon Emperor brings back our favorite tomb raiders, although Rachel Weisz wouldn’t return so Maria Bello took over her role. After the disaster of the second Mummy film I was not surprised to hear of the departure, or not return, of Weisz. But how they got Maria Bello is beyond me. Speaking of great casting that is totally wasted in this film let’s not forget Jet Li and Michelle Yeoh, the only reasons to watch this film. Especially Yeoh is completely wasted in this flick, that is trying to recapture old glory, but falls short in every regard. Li and Yeoh hardly have any screen time, which is reserved for the annoying little brat from The Mummy Returns, the McConnell son, all grown up now.

The film opens with a powerful emperor scorned by the woman he loves and the poor other guy therefore getting torn into several pieces. Thousands of years pass. Sound familiar? It is. This film is rehashing the original Mummy script. How boring and lackluster is that. A remake within your own franchise? That must be a new one. This time though the emperor comes back to raise hell, not the secret lover. We also have the people who watch over the tomb for thousands of years again including their rival faction. Everything is the same, but lacking the first one’s charme and entertainment value. Instead of a funny roller coaster ride and witty dialogue we get action that we have seen many times over and characters that have lost their energy and want to be finally done with this.

The Mummy Returns was already a big failure and a horrid film, but at least we had an interesting villain with cool powers. The element powers of Jet Li’s character are fun at first, but the script is not making enough out of it. No woah effects here when he uses his powers. They are pretty lame although effective against the other characters. Changing into all kinds of creatures doesn’t help either.

I can’t think of a single scene that I liked this time around. I was actually glad when it was finally over, with its predictable ending and the shot at a possible sequel. Who ever has the power to do so MAKE IT STOP! The characters are over this, the actors are over this and the fans as well. Bury this franchise and hope that no one in the near future will raid its burial ground and bring another curse and film into existence. Thousands of years shall pass. At least that way I won’t live to see it.

Paralyzed from the chest down after serving in Iraq for just one week, 25-year-old Tomas Young is forced to deal with the realities of war each and every day. For Tomas, learning to cope with his disability meant finding his voice to speak out against the war in Iraq.

Directed by Phil Donahue and Ellen Spiro and set to the haunting vocals of Eddie Vedder, the multi award-winning BODY OF WAR splits its time between Tomas s arduous daily reality in Kansas City, MO, and the legislative processes that led up to the invasion of Iraq in 2002.

Senatorial speeches and a running tally of pro-war votes are interspliced with intimate footage of Tomas as he navigates through the acute physical and emotional impacts of his injury. A testament to the power of parallel images, the film adeptly juxtaposes the sanitized vantage point of Washington with raw personal experience. In the end, this contrast forces viewers to question the motives, methods, and ever-rising cost of the conflict in Iraq.

A deeply moving and bracingly honest film, BODY OF WAR narrates a story that must be heard a story of courage, conviction, and resistance.

DVD Features: Eddie Vedder Music Video No More; MSNBC interview with Phil Donahue; CSPAN coverage of the House and Senate debates; Deleted Scenes; Theatrical Trailer; Filmmaker Biographies

At the center of Body of War is Tomas Young, a smart, determined guy who enlisted in the military the day after he saw President Bush stride through the ruins of the World Trade Center. He expected to be sent to Afghanistan to get the people who attacked his country; instead, he was shipped to Iraq, where he took a bullet through the collarbone a week after arriving and was paralyzed for life from the chest down. Young’s subsequent struggle to be heard, by speaking out and questioning why U.S. soldiers went to Iraq, is chronicled in this film. Directors Phil Donahue (yes, talkshow host Phil Donahue) and Ellen Spiro cast a wider net, which is where the film begins to feel a little scattered, even if their cause is a fervent one. The Senate vote on authorizing the Bush plan for Iraq is a running theme, with the names of the voters emblazoned on the screen (this would be an even more effective drumbeat if it weren’t drowning in overbearing music). Meanwhile, West Virginia Senator Robert Byrd, an old political hand with a checkered past, emerges as the voice of Constitutional sanity. His soaring speeches leading up to the crucial vote are excerpted at length, so it’s no surprise that he and Tomas Young should eventually meet. But whatever the film’s ambitions, its finest moments are in following Young and bluntly assessing (with considerable physical detail) his status. Original songs by Eddie Vedder are judiciously placed and passionately delivered. –Robert Horton

Body of War – The True Story of an Anti-War Hero is available at Amazon for $18.99. To Order click here
Amazon Product Pages contain a lot of other details on this product as Customer Reviews, Sales Ranking, Special Offers, Alternate products that customers are going for and much more.Want to read these details? click here

Want to get some other Format / Binding / Version? You can search for them from here

Other Products of Interest

• Body of War: Songs That Inspired an Iraq War Veteran
• The Limits of Power: The End of American Exceptionalism
• The Dark Side: The Inside Story of How The War on Terror Turned into a War on American Ideals
• The Way of the World: A Story of Truth and Hope in an Age of Extremism
• No End in Sight

Vince Vaughn is enormously enjoyable as the titular Fred Claus, disgruntled older brother of the better-known St. Nicholas himself, i.e., the North Pole�s very own Santa (Paul Giamatti). A garrulous hustler running from the emotional fallout of the ultimate sibling rivalry, poor Fred keeps trying to find happiness through one failed scheme after another, pushing away the people who care about him most. When brother Santa puts the squeeze on him to help out in the toy factory atop the world, Fred turns the place into one big, raucous party. Unfortunately, he�s unaware that Santa and Mrs. Claus (Miranda Richardson) are under tight scrutiny from an oversight committee (represented by a calculating Kevin Spacey) and could be shut down. The film, directed by David Dobkin (Wedding Crashers), gleams and twinkles the way a holiday movie should, and has plenty of fun material for youngsters, including a wacky chase scene in which Fred goes on the run from a half-dozen, angry Salvation Army Santas. But Fred Claus is also supposed to appeal to hip adults with a taste for ironic farce, and on that score the movie feels like a succession of Saturday Night Live skits more than an organic whole. Still, Vaughn holds everything together with a smart, insightful performance that looks deep into his character�s torment–with more than a few laughs. –Tom Keogh

Fred Claus is available at Amazon for $19.99. To Order click here
Amazon Product Pages contain a lot of other details on this product as Customer Reviews, Sales Ranking, Special Offers, Alternate products that customers are going for and much more.Want to read these details? click here

Want to get some other Format / Binding / Version? You can search for them from here

Other Products of Interest

• Wall-E (Widescreen Single-Disc Edition)
• The Dark Knight (Full-Screen Single-Disc Edition)
• Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (Single Disc)
• Horton Hears a Who (Widescreen and Full-Screen Single-Disc Edition)
• Iron Man (Single-Disc Edition)

Download Link:

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Not: Türkçe Alt yazılıdır. Alt yazısı içindedir.

Paralyzed from the chest down after serving in Iraq for just one week, 25-year-old Tomas Young is forced to deal with the realities of war each and every day. For Tomas, learning to cope with his disability meant finding his voice to speak out against the war in Iraq.

Directed by Phil Donahue and Ellen Spiro and set to the haunting vocals of Eddie Vedder, the multi award-winning BODY OF WAR splits its time between Tomas s arduous daily reality in Kansas City, MO, and the legislative processes that led up to the invasion of Iraq in 2002.

Senatorial speeches and a running tally of pro-war votes are interspliced with intimate footage of Tomas as he navigates through the acute physical and emotional impacts of his injury. A testament to the power of parallel images, the film adeptly juxtaposes the sanitized vantage point of Washington with raw personal experience. In the end, this contrast forces viewers to question the motives, methods, and ever-rising cost of the conflict in Iraq.

A deeply moving and bracingly honest film, BODY OF WAR narrates a story that must be heard a story of courage, conviction, and resistance.

DVD Features: Eddie Vedder Music Video No More; MSNBC interview with Phil Donahue; CSPAN coverage of the House and Senate debates; Deleted Scenes; Theatrical Trailer; Filmmaker Biographies

At the center of Body of War is Tomas Young, a smart, determined guy who enlisted in the military the day after he saw President Bush stride through the ruins of the World Trade Center. He expected to be sent to Afghanistan to get the people who attacked his country; instead, he was shipped to Iraq, where he took a bullet through the collarbone a week after arriving and was paralyzed for life from the chest down. Young’s subsequent struggle to be heard, by speaking out and questioning why U.S. soldiers went to Iraq, is chronicled in this film. Directors Phil Donahue (yes, talkshow host Phil Donahue) and Ellen Spiro cast a wider net, which is where the film begins to feel a little scattered, even if their cause is a fervent one. The Senate vote on authorizing the Bush plan for Iraq is a running theme, with the names of the voters emblazoned on the screen (this would be an even more effective drumbeat if it weren’t drowning in overbearing music). Meanwhile, West Virginia Senator Robert Byrd, an old political hand with a checkered past, emerges as the voice of Constitutional sanity. His soaring speeches leading up to the crucial vote are excerpted at length, so it’s no surprise that he and Tomas Young should eventually meet. But whatever the film’s ambitions, its finest moments are in following Young and bluntly assessing (with considerable physical detail) his status. Original songs by Eddie Vedder are judiciously placed and passionately delivered. –Robert Horton

Body of War – The True Story of an Anti-War Hero is available at Amazon for $19.99. To Order click here
Amazon Product Pages contain a lot of other details on this product as Customer Reviews, Sales Ranking, Special Offers, Alternate products that customers are going for and much more.Want to read these details? click here

Want to get some other Format / Binding / Version? You can search for them from here

Other Products of Interest

• Body of War: Songs That Inspired an Iraq War Veteran
• The Limits of Power: The End of American Exceptionalism
• The Dark Side: The Inside Story of How The War on Terror Turned into a War on American Ideals
• The Way of the World: A Story of Truth and Hope in an Age of Extremism
• No End in Sight