When it was time for me to transition i was intentional about where i wanted to be. At the time i was the pastor of a Black Lutheran congregation and i was living in Seattle’s Central Area. I was a public figure and i knew i couldn’t transition “on the job” because the church’s theological position. So i planed to resign in order to transition.

However resigning was not the only thing i planed to do. I also planned to move to another part of town. The Central Area was (and still is) a neighborhood with a large Black population.

As a public figure in the black community i didn’t feel that i needed to leave the community and do my transition away from my peeps. I did this because i was not at all sure how i would be received if i transitioned in the same community that knew me as a male pastor. So i moved to Silverdale, WA and later to Ballard where i made the leap from living as a male to living as a female. My transition was very successful. I made a life for myself. No one knew about my past. I was accepted in the neighborhood. All was good.

When i started to move toward ordination to the priesthood i wondered where i would serve. I knew i wanted to serve in an urban congregation. I knew that i wanted to be in Seattle. I knew that i was an asset to the diocese as an African-American priest with previous urban ministry experience. I knew that as an African-American priest i would be unusual and a rarity and would attract attention as such no matter where i went.

After i was ordained i began to wonder if i would end up at one of our congregations in the Black community. Then i learned that the bishop was looking at assigning me to All Saints in Rainier Beach–in the midst of the Black community. So i began to wonder how i would be received and how it would feel to return to the community.

My new church is not in the same neighborhood. All Saints is in Rainier Beach and Good Shepherd is in the Central Area. My house is in Columbia City not the Central Area. And it has been 11 years. So it is unlikely that i’ll encounter people who will know me or who will much care about me.

So i’ve made my return to life among my peep. It has been an easy return so far. We’ll see what happens when i begin the work at the parish and i begin to connect with neighborhood groups and leaders.

This is a week of turning in keys. Wednesday morning I’ll turn in my keys for Resurrection. Wednesday afternoon i’ll turn in my keys to D-House. Thursday i plan to turn in my keys to my old apartment.

All that feels like an ending. It is starting to sink in to me that my life really will be different on the other side of my Cleveland trip. I will be down to one set of keys for home and one set of keys for work. All of my keys will fit buildings in the zip code. My life will become focused on south Seattle. This feels kinda scary. I am starting to understand that i am about to feel limited in a way. My life will revolve around the faith community that i will shepherd and the neighborhood community that i live in. It has been a long time since i’ve had that kind of focus. I wonder how i will respond. I wonder if the narrowing down of my life will feel like focus or feel like putting on a straight jacket. The only way to find out is to jump in and see what happens. I’ll be jumping in soon.

Yesterday was my last day as the curate at the Church of the Resurrection in Bellevue, WA. I presided at both Eucharists. I was celebrated and given gifts and thanked at both services. I ate at both a breakfast and a reception given in my honor (ate too much but that is a subject for a different post). i was wished well and then i walked out the door.

It was so different from the last time i came to the end of my time at a church. The last time was 1999 and it was Nice Guy’s last service. It was the end of my career as a pastor in the Lutheran Church–Missouri Synod. A lot of things were the same. That Sunday i celebrated Communion at both services. I was celebrated and given gifts and thanked at both services. I ate too much at that celebration. People wished me well and said they would miss me.

What was different was that ten years ago it was the end of ordained ministry. This time it is the beginning to a new phase of ordained ministry. 10 years ago i fell into a horrible pit of depression after those two services. This time i am in a state of excitement and anticipation about the future. Last time i was feeling cut off and isolated. This time i feel very much embraced by community as i enter a new ministry.

Last time it was Lent and i felt like i was being crucified and left to die and be buried. This time it is Advent on the verge of Christmas and i feel like something new is just about to be born. Last time it was pain and death. This time it’s joy and life.

I am so thankful to God that he has carried me through a Lent season of my life, through a Good Friday, into an Easter and now to a new Christmas season in my life. “Oh give thanks to the Lord for he is good and his mercy endures forever.”

So, I’m pretty sure I tweeted or posted about Miles being born. He was the first baby I ever visited and held in the hospital. And I got to swaddle him. Hooray for swaddled babies. I love them. They’re like little cuddly packages of cute.

Anyway, us rugby ladies, aka the Angel Ruggers, decided to help our friend with her baby. M-Dub.

My night is tomorrow. I’m scheduled with a girl I totally love, who I haven’t seen much, and who I don’t know much. But what I do know is that she’s great.

You can wonder forever about why I think she’s great. All I’m going to tell you is that she’s and Angel. And we love one another.

In other news, I’m going to be stopping at Home Depot on my way to my rugger friend’s home. We’re oh, 30 or so blocks from one another, and we agreed to share keys a long time ago. Did we do it? Heck, no. We’re ruggers. We don’t do things immediately. (Ok, honest to God, Katy and I do things immediately. All the time!!! But we didn’t!) So now we’re going to.

I don’t want my friends Katy and Corey outside in the winter when I live a short drive OR EVEN walk from them. And I certainly don’t want my boyfriend M-dub out there!!

So, my girl Katy and I will fix this situation during this coming week. I’m just guessing we agree on this, but I’m sure we do. She knows I don’t want M-dub outside!!!

The more i interact with one of the two people who is succeeding me the more i don’t like him. He comes across as arrogant and thinks he’s the greatest thing to come along since pinstripe suits.

(sign language for “stuck-up”)

A few folks were sitting in the Great Hall (the public space of D-House) and he says of himself, “It’s about time the diocese hired someone young and dynamic.” That is just one of the unwise comments that he has made a habit of saying in public.

I have to admit that i don’t like him. I’m glad i won’t be around to have to work with him or we’d quickly have a “come to Jesus” talk about his attitude. As it is now i’ll just put up with him with the next couple of weeks and move on. I’ll pray for him however. And even though i don’t like him i’ll keep trying to love him.

Being Friday it is time to get my hair done. I need it. Last week i didn’t get my hair done as it was the holiday weekend and my salon was closed. I am in need today. I have to figure out how to get to the salon from my new home. It looks easy on the map.

This Friday is the beginning of  a new work pattern for me. I have switched my day off from Friday to Monday. That means that today is a work-day for me. I’m putting this new pattern in place now so that i can have already established before i get to my new church. So after i get my hair done i will head over to D-House to work the afternoon.

And of course Friday means that i start to anticipate my Saturday Weight Watchers weigh-in. I think i will be ok this week. I predict that i am down anywhere between 0.6 and 1.2 lbs. We shall see.

Alrighty. I really need some help here, peeps & tweeps. Please share, re-post, re-tweet, whatever. I just need suggestions!

While we love where we have Brewfest now, we really do.. There are things that we could improve upon if we had just the “right” place.”

What is my dream space for my Brewfest? (Keep in mind this also involves what we want and what we NEED…)

• Somewhere with an open floor plan. Not a few places somehow tied together. (this is MY personal dream. My helpful planners are not on the same page. My flow plan worked this year. I will guarantee any open floor plan I’m given will work. I PROMISE.)
• Said open floor plan would ideally have a nifty corner where we could have a band or set up a rent-a-stage for a band….
• Somewhere with at the very least one ice machine and a kitchen type environment.
• No carpet.
• Somewhere with at least two bathrooms each for men and women. On the same floor. Or at the most one each on the same floor and another one floor away…
• Said bathroom should come with the regular old stuff like toilet paper, soap, water and paper towels. And it should be clean when we show up. (Not kidding – previous establishments have had nasty – I kid you not NASTY – bathrooms when we showed up! We cleaned them!!)
• Somewhere that had multiple elevators if it was over 3 flights up. And if it was so, a freight elevator to help us move stuff in & out.
• Oh! Somewhere in or super-duper near to the city of Pittsburgh…  I’m talking downtown, Station Square, South Side, Mt. Washington or very, very near to there…
• Somewhere able to accommodate 1,000-1,500 people, including attendees, brewer reps and volunteers.
• Somewhere that can allow for an outdoor area, if needed. For a smoking area, a get fresh air area, whatever…

There you go. That’s it for now. Most locations can’t meet even half of those, let alone the ones that are super important (ice, bathrooms, elevators) to just the general function of the event…

I’m taking, any, all and any random ideas. We’re looking into everything peeps/tweeps. Random open spaces…

Actually, wide OPEN SPACES. Please…

Church halls, fire halls, convention center, arenas/sports facilities. Whatever ideas you have, send ‘em my way. Please. And thank you very much.

It’s official! I am a Seattleite again! I’m spending my first night in my new digs in the Columbia Coty neighborhood of Seattle. It feels good to be back.

I must admit that i am a little nervous about being in a new place. I never instantly take to any new place where i live. It takes a few nights before i begin to sleep well. I have to get comfortable in a new space. I have to get used to the sounds that are in the background all the time. I have to get used to the traffic patterns and the patterns of daily life in a new place. I have to get used to the way the darkness feels in a new living space. This house will make sounds that are unique to it and i have to adjust to those sounds.

Also i have strong emotions around moving and starting over in a new neighborhood. I must establish new connections and new acquaintances. I have to deal with the routine issues of relocation. Where will i find places to establish the routines that make me feel grounded and safe and accepted? There are a million billion details that i must attend to.

Well it’s past 1am. I really must make the bed and retire for the evening. When the sun comes up i do have a ton of stuff to do. After all, i am a priest.

Tonight i got a call from the owner of the house that i applied to rent. My application has been accepted and i will sign the lease on Wednesday of next week. I hope to actually move on the Satruday after Thanksgiving. I am so ready for this because i am so done with Bellevue. I want out of here!

I am so over SR 520 and the floating bridges. There are a million things that i will not miss when i leave here. not the least of which is my noisy neighbor. They are always playing the TV or the stereo too loud. It is never quite over on the other side of the wall.

I also won’t miss having to walk outside with my laundry to the laundry room or the limited hours that the laundry room is open or the inconvience of lugging the laundry over in the rain only to find that the washers are all full.

I’m looking forward to having a second room in which i can have my office (i.e. The Creativity Factory). I need a place, not in the church building, where i can read and write and create.

I am pleased to have a house that will not be so far from where my boyfriend lives, a house that is not far from downtown Seattle, a house that is near places in Seattle that i like, a house near good local establishments for music and entertainment, a house in a community in which i see lots of Black folk.

I know there will be challenges to living in Seattle again but i’m ready for those challenges. Just get me out of Bellevue and back to a place that feels more like home.

I think we have our heads right and will have totals on Brewfest within a day or two. And surveys are being sent out. Whatcha think? If you get the survey, please tell us. Good or bad. It’s just so much to deal with, even after everything that led up to the event. As a responsible event planner, I’m trying to check back with our attendees… Two years ago? I never thought of this. Now, it’s another responsibility.

And yet, some ruggers didn’t work and hid from us so they didn’t have to work. That? Hurts. It hurts me a ton, especially since I said all along, you work all night, you don’t pay – and unsaid, I’d have loved you forever as a rugger. I know who worked. And who hid. And who hid and did work. And who just tried to drink their faces off while pretending to work.

Those of you in the hid & worked category, you’re ok. I’m not pleased, but I’ll deal with it. Kudos to you!!! I thank you – thirty times over! Thank you!!

Those of you who I KNOW didn’t work? Or who pretended & drank? I’m so disappointed with you. Honestly, that should make you feel worse than those who didn’t work.

I might be a task-master and make you think you work your a** off. But in reality, the rest of us have been working for months behind the scenes. And for you to be unable to give us 2-3 hours of work? I AM SO DISAPPOINTED in you as a human being.

Those of you who have seen me working at My Living Room and yelling in the past, or have seen me at Coopers Lake, or saw me yelling at Brewfest, that yelling is nothing to being let down and what I feel towards my clubmates for this. So disappointed.

There were a number that I didn’t expect to show up & work – and they did. In mass numbers! I kid you not! I have pictures from others to prove it. I’m proud, so proud, of those people. They proved me wrong. I LOVE being proved WRONG.

I hate being let down.

Good luck, to those who let me down. That’s all I’m going to say. Because I’m not going anywhere, and I’ll remember this.

Good luck.

Yesterday it went public. I told the people of the congregation where i serve that i will be leaving. I can now reveal details that i had to keep confidential. I will be the next vicar at All Saints Episcopal Church in Seattle. I begin my new duties the first week in January 2010. Since i’ll be going home for a little bit around Christmas my last day at my current congregation will be December 20th.

I found myself much more emotional than i thought i would be when it came time to make the announcement. There were certain members who i knew i couldn’t look at during my announcement or i was going to lose it completely. It was hard to say i was leaving even though i’ve only been there a short while and have been part-time on top of that. Still i care deeply about the people of the Episcopal Church of the Resurrection.

The members expressed a mix of emotion: surprise and sadness seemed to be the most common. There were some who were angry and didn’t think it fair that i would have to leave after being present for such a short time. Honestly a few people are probably relieved. There was a segment of the congregation that was not comfortable with me. My way of coming at you with high energy, creativity and an emphasis on multi-cultural ministry made some people nervous and uncomfortable. They would just as soon i leave so that church can “get back to normal.” However most of the congregation expressed the sentiment that i will be missed and that i’ve already contributed a lot to the life of this parish.

There are lots of things i will miss about Resurrection. I will also really miss being in a team situation where i shared preaching and presiding at Eucharist. At All Saints i’ll be it every week. I think i’ll move to change that somehow so that i get a break and the people of All Saints get a break too. I’ve come to value to opportunity to hear different voices in worship and preaching.

And so i begin to move away from the Church of the Resurrection. The separation process has begun.

So i stepped on the scale today at my meeting fully expecting to see a gain and i was surprised to hear that i’d lost 3.6 pounds this week and am now at 192.2 lbs.

Although i like what happened this week i am a bit perplexed as to how to explain it. I didn’t do well this week. At least i didn’t think i did well this week. I track my food and i do a pretty good job at doing that. In the Weight Watchers plan i get 35 points of food that i can use anyway i want in addition to the regular daily points. Usually i don’t use anymore than 10 to 15 points of that 35 each week. This week i used pretty much all of them. Add to that the fact that i only had one day of exercise (Friday) and i figured that i should be looking at a gain. Maybe what happened was that i overestimated the points of some of the foods i ate this week. I ate some things that i don’t normally eat and i think i got the points wrong.

Also most of the hours at work this week i was standing. I usually sit at a desk when i’m at D-House but since i no longer have a desk at D-House i’ve been putting my laptop on the piano in the Great Hall and standing by it. I guess doing this for 8 hours a day has helped me burn more calories than i would in a normal week. That might have helped me.

I am now at the place in this process where i need to think about what my final goal weight should be. Today it seems reasonable to have 160 lbs as my goal. That would get me in the high-end of a normal weight. That would mean that i have to lose 32.2 pounds before i’d be there. And that is still a lot of weight. When i get to 160 i’ll re-assess and see if i need to adjust my goal downward.

After the game on Sunday, most of our teammates left Houston. A few of us were left. We went to dinner. Some of them went out after, but I was hit with the panic of all the things I had to get done for Brewfest. So I was gifted with a cab back to the hotel.

I managed to get most things done, as much as I could. The entire exhaustion of the weekend hit me then. I crashed & crashed hard. I don’t remember my room mates coming home!

The next morning we slowly woke. I realized that I was not immune to the mosquito bites my teammates had received the two previous days. I was itchy and spotted all over. And I had a black eye. Fun! But where did that come from? (Stil no idea!) Combine that with the two GIANT blisters on the bottoms of my 4^th toe on BOTH feet and my inability to walk from the pain of them? I was a spectacle to behold… WOW.

We started to pack and get into the vans. We arrived around 11:30am. I was in a different terminal than my teammates. I asked about an earlier flight… I missed it by about a half hour. Great. And I couldn’t check my bags yet. I had over an hour to wait.

I finally checked my bags and entered the terminal. Lunch at Chili’s with a fail of a waitress. I then went to the gate and FINALLY finished my sewing project. Hooray!

Once I got to DC, I hobbled around to find somewhere for dinner.  I found that the more I walked, the less the blisters hurt. But sitting, then walking hurt like crazy. So I walked. I finally got some food and sat down at my gate, 10 min to boarding.

And then the oh-my-gosh-can’t-speak-English gate person made an announcement that we were delayed about 30min. I had to charge my phone, so I went to the nifty Samsung charging station (only good thing about the DC airport). I overheard some guy saying our flight might be cancelled and that was the last flight out of DC.

At that point, I was 11hours into my airport/plane vacation that day. I wanted to go home. I wanted MY bed. My friends. My ride home. Cancellation was NOT an option.

All of my friends were at Ruggers, celebrating our success. I was stuck in an airport watching the Steelers, praying my flight would take off.

We waited what seemed like forever. I made friends over my new Scotland jersey, my black eye and my rugby hoodie. Everyone congratulated me and via me, my teammates for our showing at Nationals. They all seemed to know what rugby was and what a great achievement. I was so proud.

Our flight finally boarded after 11pm. Over an hour late. We arrived in the ‘Burgh after midnight. Thankfully, my day-glo yellow bag was already in the baggage area. Sweet.

I finally made it home after 1:30am.

A few days later, I feel better, besides the bug bites. The toes are better. And I want to start fall season tomorrow again. I want it back. I will be back in the Spring, and give it another try this next fall, along with my teammates. I need you all to remind me at the start of the season that I finally found again my game. My sight. My love.

I may be overwhelmed with the work. I may not want to socialize with other teams anymore, I may just want to play and go home. But at this point, I’m allowed that. But after the past few weeks of practice, I realized I still can see my game the way I dreamed I could. And I have to give myself one last chance to try to get that championship.  My teammates and I? We CAN and WILL do it. And we deserve it, as does our coach.

Awww, yeah… tomorrow is Brewfest.

And if I didn’t realize I was freaking the heck out, my super awesome shoulder pain (where I obviously “store” my stress) is back in full force, screaming at me.

Nice.

I think we’re ready. Well, by we, I mean everyone else. I’m currently trying to wrap up online Will Call sales, print out about 2,763 pages of docs (ok, that might be an exxageration. Maybe.) and figure out what the heck is going on tomorrow.

I know I am forgetting approximately 300 things.

Will call ticket sales have come in, I kid you not, every few minutes, all day today. To the point that it took me an hour tonight to make sure I got all the orders recorded. Wow.

Nearly 800 tickets sold so far. And I expect a ton of walk-ins tomorrow night. 84 beers. Who can turn that down? Even myself, as a non-beer drinker, has a few on the list I want to try.

Especially Tommyknocker’s Maple Nut Brown Ale. I’m sorry, but if you combine just about anything with Maple Syrup? I will try it. Most likely, I will love it. I believe I’ve discussed my love of the Starbucks Maple Macchiato here. No longer exists (Starbucks? Super fail. You’d have all my coffee $$ in the fall if you still had it!!) So here’s hoping for the Maple Nut Brown Beer.

If you’re coming tomorrow and don’t know me in person yet, I’ll most likely be near the entrance, but if you can’t find me, ask someone in a black & gold rugby shirt to find a “lead” and call me on our super-cool walkie talkies… I’ll come find you!

Here’s hoping I survive tomorrow night!

(P.S. Who’s bringing me a bottle of American Honey so that I can make it through the night? Anyone? Anyone?)

This afternoon i went into D-House and the woman who handles deployment called me into her office. I knew what she wanted. She wanted to tell me what i already knew, that congregation #1 said no. So i sat down and waited to hear news that would not be news.

To my surprise she began, “I have good news for you.” She went on to say that congregation #1 has voted to accept the bishop’s deal and to accept me along with the deal. They said yes and i said GREAT!!!!!

The plan is for me to start at my new congregation on January 1st. I’m so excited that i want to tell everyone but i can’t yet. I have to keep it confidential until we figure out a way to tell all the parties involved in such a way as they all find out at the same time. Congregation #3 needs to be informed as does the congregation that i’m currently serving. When that happens i can go public. Until then i still cannot name names and i can’t tell anyone but my closest associates. My boss at D-House knows. Tomorrow i’ll tell the priest-in-charge at the congregation i’m serving the news. I’ll also tell my parents and siblings and, of course, i’ll tell my boyfriend.

There’s so much to do between now and January 1st. And i’ll be writing all about it here.

I’m sitting in the Starbucks at the intersection of Rainier Avenue S and S Edmunds Street as i write this. Yes, i’m in Columbia City (again). What bring me here today? The quest for housing.  As of today i have about a month and a half left before my current job ends. I have no new job to go to. I have one less job option now than i did before this day began. And yet my search for housing has gone to the next level. I actually made and appointment and saw a house today.

The location is perfect. It’s here in Columbia City.

It’s a 7 minute drive from the church that i hope will call me. It’s a 6 minute walk from the Columbia City station of the new Link light rail that runs from downtown Seattle to the airport. It’s on a nice street that feels safe. It’s near all the stores and shops i want to be near. It’s in a walkable neighborhood. It’s in an ethnically diverse neighborhood. And there are lots of black folk here!

The house is the perfect size for me. It is small. But that is just what i want in terms of size. The larger bedroom will work as my sleeping space and the smaller bedroom with be a perfect study or as i’ve always called my study space: “The Creativity Factory.” the kitchen is a useable size and the living room/dining room will be just right. There is plenty of storage and there is a basement has a washer and dryer.

It’s an old house (1919) but a lot of upgrades have happened. New windows, new plumbing, reworked electrical system, newly insulated walls; roof in good shape. There is nice front porch and a beautiful rear deck and wonderful yard. And there is a garage too. I fell in love with they place. i want it. I’m filling out the application this afternoon!

The price is affordable. Yes, it will be a stretch financially but i expect that my salary will go up as i move from being an administrative assistant to being a fulltime priest.

And one more advantage of the house: it is available now. If congregation #1 says yes and if the owners say yes then i could be out of Bellevue by the start of December.

The day began with news from congregation #2. I was surprised to hear from them. I figured that it would be a week or so ye before i would get word from them. But that was not the only thing that surprised me. They informed me that they would be calling someone else and not me to be their priest.

In all my time in my previous church body no church ever said no to me. I got every position that i ever applied for. This is the first time that a church has ever said no to me. Now the very first Episcopal congregation to ever consider me says no. This is an inauspicious beginning to my new vocation as an Episcopal priest. And i admit that i’m a little shaken by it.

Part of me wants to know why they said no. When i look at this church i see a place that has never had anything but white male straight priests. Perhaps it was unrealistic to expect that they would be ready to call a black female transgendered priest. This congregation is in a military community. It’s Navy territory in Bremerton. Maybe i would not have done well in that setting. Perhaps i would not have been very effective there.

Plus, truth to tell, that congregation was my second choice. Congregation #1 is my first choice. That is where a challenge that i feel i can meet can be found. That is where my heart is pulling me. So today i pray for congregation #2:

“Lord, thank you for the people of congregation #2. Thank you for being with them in their discernment process and for guiding them in their choice. Bless the priest whom they call and give her/him wisdom to hear your voice in the voice of this community of faith. Thank you, Lord, for what you have shown me in this process. Give me the peace of closure and the grace to move forward in faith. Guide me also, Lord, because life in the church can get confusing. Amen.”

This is a difficult day for me. I hate war and i love war. It fascinates me and its imagery runs through songs that i like and pops up constantly in the language of my faith and religious tradition. My religious tradition has been used and is currently used to justify and even initiate war.

At the same time there are strong anti-war themes in my faith and religious tradition. Efforts to care for those affected by the horrors of war have come from people who share my faith as followers of Christ. Deeply embedded at the heart of my religious tradition is the idea that all humanity is loved by God and that we are called to love one another…certainly this is more than a little inconsistent with the idea of war.

At the same time i cannot hide from my own personal culpability. I benefit from war: from the wars of conquest that captured the very land on which i sit to write this note all the way up to the war in Afghanistan which raises the demand for soldiers and has given two of my nephews a way to earn a living and help their parents. In all honesty i don’t want to give back any of those benefits.

Yet my heart breaks when i hear about horrors of war. When i see the devastation that our weapons of war have caused i feel profoundly sad and angry. And i feel sad and angry when i see the impact of war on our nation’s soldiers and their families.

This is deeply painful to me and feel trapped. I feel helpless to do anything and i feel that my own moral authority is totally undermined. My heart says, “Would that there were a world without war.” My head says, “I know the reality of human behavior that leads to war.” I just can’t reconcile those two.

So what will i do? On this Veterans Day, Remembrance Day, Armistice Day i commit myself anew to the crazy dance between hope and war. I don’t have a neat easy way to end this post. I don’t have a cute way to wrap this up in a bow and complete the thought because i’m not finished thinking about it. Nor am i done acting. I will keep doing something that moves me and my society toward peace while not denying my fascination with, my culpability in and my benefitting from war.

(This was supposed to post on Monday. Again, oops.)

We finished up our season yesterday. Second place in Nationals.

And we’re okay with it.

We beat Albany 5-3 in the semi-finals.

Due to a wild card system in the semi-finals, we had to again face Raleigh in the Finals, whom we beat the day before.

This time we lost 12-0.

Our team played hard. Very. But we’re okay – last time, 4th; this time 2nd. It’s all good.

Just wait for next year.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now it’s on to Brewfest work for me!

My D-House position is going away and i’m being replaced. One person will be the Administrative Assistant for Ethnic Ministries and another person will be the Secretary for Vocations. One of those has already landed and i’m bringing her up to speed. On Friday the other person landed. The second person needs a place to work and so on Friday i cleaned out my workspace and took all of my possessions to my car and put them in the trunk.

I had mixed feelings about that. My workspace at D-House is now no longer mine. It officially belongs to two other people now. I don’t have a space at D-House any more. That feels kinda wierd. I’m starting to feel very disconnected from D-House. I guess this is how i should feel as i am in the process of moving into a new role in The organization.

At the same time i don’t have a permanent workspace at the congregation i’m currently serving. When i come to work at the church i bring all that i need to work, including a computer and a phone. I pack in and pack it out everyday that i’m here. And now the same will be true of my D-House work. Every day i go there i will bring all i need to do my work. I’ll pack it in and pack it out.

The place where i live, of course, is a different story. Well actually it isn’t. Much of my stuff is in boxes. I’m beginning to box up even more stuff as i anticipate having to move when either of the congregations that is interested in me actually calls me. So i don’t feel like i have a permanent place anywhere right now. I feel very disconnected. I feel as if i’m floating around just waiting for a place to land.

It was pouring down rain as i drove up to the church. I pulled up the hood on my coat, grabbed my computer bag and my purse and headed toward the door. As i opened it the first person i met was surprised to see me. Her response was to look surprised and say “Oh you’re the one.” The second person on the Bishop’s Committee said, “I never thought it was you the bishop was talking about.” It turned out that the Senior Warden was the only person who knew it was me before that meeting started.

As i made my way around the room to meet church leaders who didn’t expect to be meeting me, i started to feel like i was in the opening episode of the Vicar of Dibley. In that series a new female vicar comes to a small church that is not expecting her. It’s even pouring rain on the day she arrives to meet with the leaders. One of the leaders was late and when she came in and saw me she exclaimed, “It’s Carla Robinson! Wow!”

The interview began. I asked questions. They asked questions. We talked for two hours. They gave me a tour of the facility. I stayed in the Junior Warden (a long time leader who has served in many roles in that congregation) and we talked about administrative issues and other sundry items.

In the end i left feeling very good about the interview. The place has some serious challenges. There’s a lot of hard work to do there. This is not a cushy assignment. It’s going to take time to turn the place around. But the leaders expressed a desire to do that work, to do church differently, to make changes and try some new things in outreach and worship. I don’t know if they really understand what change will mean but they said they are committed to trying.

I came out of the church, got in my car and i knew that i had won over all of them…every single member of the Bishop’s Committee. They are ready to say YES to the bishop’s deal and to me.

It’s time to get serious about finding a new place to live. However before i do that i have one more interview. And that’s on Friday evening.

This evening i have an interview with the decision-making group at congregation #1. This is it! The whole deal comes down to this interview. This is the leadership’s first and only chance to meet me before they have to decide. There is a lot riding on this. If this interview goes well and they like what they see then they’ll say yes to the bishop’s deal and i’ll become the vicar of congregation #1. If they don’t like what they see then they will say no to the bishop’s deal and i’ll have a hope dashed.

I’m nervous. I suspect they will be nervous too. I’ve thought about what they will ask me. I have answers ready to the basic questions that i know they will ask. Spiritually i’m in a centered, prayerful place. I think i’m ready.

Let’s roll the dice and see what the evening brings.

Well, sort of. Here’s yesterday’s to-do list… What I accomplished today is crossed off. What I absolutely HAVE to do tomorrow, that’s in red. Things that will be/should be finished up later tonight, they’re blue…

• One more practice. The last practice of the year. Wow. But a news crew is stopping by that practice!! More on that soon…

• Sewing. It HAS to be done. I don’t want to have to take it with me, but it might happen. Sewing makes me happy… So maybe I should just take it… I don’t know… This is something I have to clear with Lili, to be honest.

• Laundry – lots of it. I seem to have enough rugby stuff for two practices or games. That’s it. You’d think by now I’d have a stock-pile of stuff, but I don’t. The one area I’m apparently a true minimalist.

• Also, my socks keep disappearing. I have no idea where they are going, but I have very few socks in rotation suddenly. What the heck?

• After laundry, I need to figure out what the heck I need to take with me for the weekend. Two flights, one light practice, four rugby matches, at least two or three dinners with the team. And who knows what else. I need to review the kagillion emails in my inbox that I’ve been ignoring.

• Packing:
  • The checked bag
    • The checked bag gets most of the clothes, the bad-ass dirty boots and a bunch of other things. First, however, I need to clear it of all the clothes/crap I store in there throughout the season.
  • The carry on
    • The carry on gets the old boots, and enough for one rugby match & a pair of flip flops. God help me if my stuff goes missing.
  • My netbook bag
    • The netbook bag will have said netbook, multiple reading materials (including Candide, which I haven’t manged to finish yet, given everything else,) Brewfest stuff in print that I can work on, and the essential docs required for roster check in before our game: a copy of my birth certificate, my insurance card and my ID.

• Hopefully two, but absolutely ONE chiropractor appointment. Good thing about this season? I didn’t have back pain at all. Bad thing? When I finally started to participate, my back started hating me in FULL FORCE. OMG. It’s not the worst it’s been, but the constant ache is closing in on unbearable.

• One meeting with UncleCrappy for a good-luck beer tomorrow night. (aka this evening…)
  

• Updating the Angels Chalk Talk Blog… I hate to say it, but I’m scheduling posts between now and when we leave. It HAS to be done, if I want to do anything else on this list.

• Updating the PRFC website to take down mailed out Brewfest ticket orders and switch to Will Call ticket orders.

• Mailing out the remaining ticket orders.

• Getting back to the multiple brewers who suddenly want to attend Brewfest.

Oh, and the brackets stuff? It’s changed. AGAIN.

Seeding:

1. Miami (USA Rugby South)
2. Pittsburgh (MidWest)
3. Albany (Northeast)
4. Raleigh (MidAtlantic)
5. Providence (Northeast)
6. Charleston (USA Rugby South)
7. Maryland Stingers (MidAtlantic)
8. Minneapolis (MidWest)
9. Santa Monica (Southern California)
10. Houston (West)

Pool A: Pittsburgh, Raleigh, Charleston, Houston
Pool B: Miami, Providence, Minneapolis
Pool C: Albany, Maryland, Santa Monica

Saturday

POOL A
Venue: University of Houston

1:00pm – Pittsburgh vs Charleston – Field 1
1:00pm – Raleigh vs Houston – Field 2

3:30pm – 1pm game losers – Field 1
3:30pm – 1 pm game winners – Field 2

POOLS B AND C
Venue: Westland Family YMCA

8:30am – Albany vs Maryland (C)
9:45am – Miami vs Providence (B)
11:00am – Maryland vs Santa Monica (C)

12:45pm – Providence vs Minneapolis (B)
2:00pm – Albany vs Santa Monica (C)
3:15pm – Miami vs Minneapolis (B)

Sunday
Venue: University of Houston

9:00am – Game 11: Pool A #1 vs Pool C #1
9:00am – Game 12: Pool B #1 vs Overall #4
9:00am – Game 13: Overall #9 vs Overall #10

10:30am – Game 14: Overall #7 vs Overall #8
10:30am – Game 15: Overall #5 vs Overall #6

11:30am -Game 16: Loser game 11 vs Loser game 12 (3/4 place)
1:00pm – Game 17: Winner game 11 vs Winner game 12 (Final)

Two days from now, I will be staying at a teammate’s house. I’m happy I’ll have a bunch of girls there to make sure my butt wakes up at an hour I don’t really believe exists.

There is so much to do between now and then:

• One more practice. The last practice of the year. Wow. But a news crew is stopping by that practice!! More on that soon…

• Sewing. It HAS to be done. I don’t want to have to take it with me, but it might happen. Sewing makes me happy… So maybe I should just take it… I don’t know… This is something I have to clear with Lili, to be honest.

• Laundry – lots of it. I seem to have enough rugby stuff for two practices or games. That’s it. You’d think by now I’d have a stock-pile of stuff, but I don’t. The one area I’m apparently a true minimalist.

• Also, my socks keep disappearing. I have no idea where they are going, but I have very few socks in rotation suddenly. What the heck?

• After laundry, I need to figure out what the heck I need to take with me for the weekend. Two flights, one light practice, four rugby matches, at least two or three dinners with the team. And who knows what else. I need to review the kagillion emails in my inbox that I’ve been ignoring.

• Packing:
  • The checked bag
    • The checked bag gets most of the clothes, the bad-ass dirty boots and a bunch of other things. First, however, I need to clear it of all the clothes/crap I store in there throughout the season.
  • The carry on
    • The carry on gets the old boots, and enough for one rugby match & a pair of flip flops. God help me if my stuff goes missing.
  • My netbook bag
    • The netbook bag will have said netbook, multiple reading materials (including Candide, which I haven’t manged to finish yet, given everything else,) Brewfest stuff in print that I can work on, and the essential docs required for roster check in before our game: a copy of my birth certificate, my insurance card and my ID.

• Hopefully two, but absolutely ONE chiropractor appointment. Good thing about this season? I didn’t have back pain at all. Bad thing? When I finally started to participate, my back started hating me in FULL FORCE. OMG. It’s not the worst it’s been, but the constant ache is closing in on unbearable.

• One meeting with UncleCrappy for a good-luck beer tomorrow night.

• Updating the Angels Chalk Talk Blog… I hate to say it, but I’m scheduling posts between now and when we leave. It HAS to be done, if I want to do anything else on this list.

• Updating the PRFC website to take down mailed out Brewfest ticket orders and switch to Will Call ticket orders.

• Mailing out the remaining ticket orders.

• Getting back to the multiple brewers who suddenly want to attend Brewfest.

Yeah, looks like a fun two days, doesn’t it?

This blog, however, will be updated daily, even if it’s to tell you I’m alive. Facebook? Don’t count on it. Twitter? Well, I have my phone, but at this point, don’t expect much there either except for updates on Saturday and Sunday when I can.

By the way, I can’t remember if I’ve said it lately or not, but I felt in the Spring that I finally got the game. Somewhere between then and this season, I lost it. I don’t know what happened…. I plan to think about & write about it in the next few days, but IT’S BACK PEOPLE.

But, after the last three practices and how I see myself reacting to what my teammates do? For the most part, it’s back… I have a few things to work on, but I’m seeing things the way I did in the Spring.

That? Makes me so happy. And so ready for this weekend. We’re so ready, My Angels and I.

Ok. On Friday I mentioned that it was still too early to enter freak-out mode for Houston.

Well, it’s almost time. Tomorrow will be spent fixing something that kinda went bad on me & needs to be done NOW! Yikes…

Then it’s two practices, two days & one semi-free evening to get my ducks in a row. I managed to make a packing list, but I’ll modify it and get things together on Wednesday. Hopefully it won’t take too long.

And then it’s a 6:11am flight on Friday. Yes, six eleven AM. And how great am I at waking up early & making those early flights? I’m a big failure. So to counteract my inability to wake up, I’m going to crash at a teammate’s house the night before the flight. This teammate lives 10 minutes from the airport and has graciously offered up her house to the team. Whoo. Thank you!

I’m checking one bag, the day-glo yellow rugby bag. All because of my big, bad-ass boots. Personally, I love my boots and see nothing wrong with them:

However, according to Woycheck & Shireman, they are terrifying, lethal weapons.  Heh. We’re all entitled to our opinions. They may be wrong, but they’re entitled to their opinion.

So I’ll be checking the bag & my boots. And since I’m literally terrified to check bags? I’ll be taking a carry on which will hold my falling-apart old boots, and enough clothing for one rugby match. Let’s hope that’s a fall back plan.