I had this song in my head for a while. But it seems pretty fitting with the things going on right now. Ok and to make it clear i am not a EMO.

Im gonna make it bend and break,
They sent you to me without wings,
Say a prayer, but let the good times roll,
In case God doesn’t show,
Let the good times roll (Let the good times roll)
And I want these words to make things right,
But its the wrong’s that make the words come to life,
Who does he think he is?
If that’s the worst you’ve got,
Better put your fingers back to the key.

One night and one more time,
Thanks for the memories,
Even though they weren’t so great,
He tastes like you, only sweeter,
One night, yea, one more time,
Thanks for the memories,
Thanks for the memories,
See, he tastes like you, only sweeter.
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Been looking forward to the future,
But my eyesight is going bad,
And this crystal ball is,
Always cloudy except for (except for),
When you look into the past (look into the past),
One night stand (One night stand, oh)

One night and one more time,
Thanks for the memories,
Even though they weren’t so great,
He tastes like you, only sweeter,
One night, yea, one more time,
Thanks for the memories,
Thanks for the memories,
See, he tastes like you, only sweeter.
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

They say I only think,
In the form of crunching numbers,
In hotel rooms, collecting Page Six lovers,
Get me out of my mind, and get you out of those clothes.
Im a liner away from getting you into the mood.
Woah-oh.

One night and one more time,
Thanks for the memories,
Even though they weren’t so great,
He tastes like you, only sweeter,
One night, (Woah) Yea (Woah) one more time,
Thanks for the memories,
Thanks for the memories,
See, he tastes like you, only sweeter.
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

One more night,
One more time,
Thanks for the memories,
Even though they weren’t so great,
He tastes like you, only sweeter,
One (more) night, Yea one more time,
Thanks for the memories,
Thanks for the memories,
See, he tastes like you, only sweeter.
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.

Remember, remember, the fifth of November.

It was Guy Fawkes Night yesterday! (Go watch V For Vendetta, friends, if you haven’t!) Omg it was so cool – there were fireworks all around the city last night. A couple of my friends &I went down to Southwark to watch the fireworks there, and all I can say is ‘prettyyyyyy’!

Heehee, oh the perks of being in London. I’m really starting to love it here.

Okay back to my readings! I’ve seriously got too much work to do. Good job me for choosing four essay-based modules this year.

Random Twix bars, M&S Jam Sandwiches, Wasabi’s Mochi, Starbucks Caramel Macchiato, hot chocolate, gin &tonic, Strongbow, La Tasca’s tapas, Wasabi teriyaki chicken, Subway sandwiches, diet Coke, Tortilla’s chicken burrito, Thai food, Ferrero Rocher, Four Season’s duck, Princi’s strawberry tart, Princi’s chocolate tart, Häagen Daz Belguim waffles, Xiao Long Bao, cappuccinos, Korean BBQ, Exmouth Market’s Nutella crêpe…

Breakfasts, lunches, dinners, drinks, desserts.

Roses, single & bouquet.

+ + + more, much more.

I’m spoilt, but happy.

-

School has been getting a lot better recently, even despite the 2 essays I have due next week, and another 2 the week after that. I’ve met a lot of new people, and that makes me really happy! The past few weeks have been extremely hectic, with many informal mixers, pub crawls, birthday dinners, school events, drinking sessions, mid-autumn lantern festival celebrations, society meetings, shopping/lunch dates with friends, walks along the Thames river..

London is really starting to grow on me.

&&& Halloween is coming up! Gonna attend a Halloween Boat Party this Saturday. Heeheehee can’t wait!

You pull me closer to love.
- Mat Kearney

HELLO EVERYBODY! (:

My life in London has officially begun. There’re so many things for me to blog about, but unfortunately my caffeine high from the espresso I drank at 5pm can only last me so long. So I’ll just try to briefly blog about the things that happened, starting from where my last entry left off.

Friday (18th Sept 2009):
I’m sorry baby, for getting pissed off at you that night. I never meant to. I guess that I was just feeling scared over the little time that we had left together. Thanks for coming down to Zouk to talk to me eventually though, &I’m really glad that things worked out in the end.

Anyways, on that Friday morning, Si’en and Meryl (LOVE!) accompanied me to a fabulous McDonald’s breakfast (even more love!) and then to JP to settle my bank and insurance matters. After that, Kelv’s parents treated my sis and I to a dinner at East Coast. It’s really amazing how our families could’ve remained so close after all these years. &I was really touched by how Kelv’s parents decided to treat us to dinner just to say farewell to me.. I never knew how much we meant to them until that night. I hope they know how grateful I am to them and their family.

Saturday (19th Sept 2009):
Thank you baby for such an awesome ‘last night in Singapore’! Thanks for the dinner, the alcohol, the clubbing &the after-clubbing. If I could, I’d make that night last forever. Thinking about it now makes me miss you so so so much. I wish you were here.

Sunday (20th Sept 2009 – D-day) + Monday (21st Sept 2009):
I had a wonderful send off! Thanks again, baby for accompanying me from my place to the airport. And thanks everyone for coming to the air port to see me off! I was so surprised that so many people came! The girls and gang from secondary school, my entire class from JC, council people, band friends + other random friends from everywhere else. I’m so gna miss everyone in Singapore! I never knew that leaving would be this hard. In fact, just as the plane began to take off, I even started to tear.

Anyways, the plane ride was okay. I was too tired to make full use of Krisworld and only managed to watch 1.5 movies. (1.5 because I fell asleep while watching ‘The Proposal’.) Thank God the flight was okay and we all managed to land safely at 6am London time. Upon arrival, we waited in the aiport till 9am for the transport to pick us up and send us to our halls.

Then, being the kiasu enthu bunch of people that we are, we decided to check into our halls in the morning and then meet up again in the afternoon to settle bank matters. And stupidly enough, out of the 8 LSE people I flew with, I was the only one allocated Rosebery Hall (the hall that’s the furthest away from everybody else’s).. so that meant that I would have to figure out a way to get from my hall to our meeting place all by myself. At first, I was a bit worried that I might not have been able to navigate through the neighbourhood by myself, but I was convinced that I was competent enough to figure it all out alone.

Gawd, how much wronger could I have been!!!

And thus began my great adventure through the streets of East Central and West Central London where I got so friggin’ omg LOST for ONE ENTIRE HOUR.

Here, let me draw you guys a map of my ‘great adventure’:

I started at Rosebery Hall (the ‘X’ on the right) and was trying to make my way to Euston Station (the ‘X’ on the left). Because I had no map, I memorised the street names from the lousy LSE booklet and decided to ‘wing’ my way through the streets. As you can see, I walked around in a gigantic circle! It might not look that big, but trust me.. things are never to scale). Even though I was frigging lost, I didn’t want to ask any of the locals for directions cause I was too embarrassed to. :$ After a while, I gave up and called K to rescue me. The yellow cross is where he and C finally found me after an hour or so.

GOODGAWD I WAS FUCKING TRAUMATIZED AFTER THAT EXPERIENCE. &because of that, I’m now afraid to venture off into London by my lonesome self.

RAWRRRRRZZ. Well anyways, after we finally made it to Euston station, we began bank shopping. I think in the entire day, all of us walked at least 20k around the city. Stupid London and its expensive transport system !@#$!. The only cheap way to travel around here is by foot. WTFWTFWTF I think I’ll have extremely sexy legs after my time here.

So the entire afternoon was spent around the city and afterwards, I had dinner with K, C and S at International Hall. After dinner, K and C were nice enough to walk me to my hall because they knew that I’d probably get lost if I were to walk back by myself. But despite having 3 heads among us, we STILL got lost, walking for 40minutes until we finally located my hall. Fabulous. HAHAHA. Rawrrr why is my hall so far awayyyyy. Oh well! I guess this is what I get for choosing money over convenience.

Tuesday (22nd Sept 2009):
Went to LSE in the morning in hope of opening a bank account at Natwest. Instead, we spent the entire time in the computer room and library facebooking and figuring out how to print stuff. Afterwards, we took the tube (which is effing confusing and expensive, btw) to Victoria to go shopping for household appliances at Argos. Dinner was again at International Hall and then a few of us went grocery shopping at Waitrose after. I finally returned to my hall at 10pm and fell aslp at my table almost immediately after turning my laptop on.

Wednesday (23rd Sept 2009):
Went to LSE with KZ in the morning to finally open up our bank accounts. We then walked 1hr 10min to Madame Tussaund’s Wax Museum, where we took lots and lots of pictures with balls of wax. I’m too tired to upload pictures right now, so I’ll do it another day. This post is long enough as it is and I’ve seriously got to rest for another full day of exciting activities tmr! Gosh, I’m getting so tired of all this walking.

Goodnight world. I miss everyone and I miss youuu, JB. <3

]]> http://icedbananas.wordpress.com/2009/09/18/boom-what-you-say/ Thu, 17 Sep 2009 19:11:39 +0000 V. http://icedbananas.wordpress.com/2009/09/18/boom-what-you-say/

It’s 3am in the morning now and Meryl &Si’en are asleep on my couch. Haha, I’m pretty exhausted but I’ll still do a mini-update cause I’ll probably be too busy to even touch the computer in the next few days. :/

My week’s been super busy so far!

• Monday: Packing
• Tuesday: Shopping with Si’en &Meryl, Dinner at Crystal Jade, Sleepover at Meryl’s
• Wednesday: Breakfast with a long lost primary school buddy!, Shopping with the Sister, Dinner with S &F, Supper alone with T cancelled for cards at Arab Street with S, F, J and T
• Thursday: Packing my room, Dinner with <3 at Timbre

With all that, I wonder what the next 3 days would be like! c:

Anyways, Timbre was really fun, guys. I totally heart y’all &will miss you guys terribly. Thanks so much for coming, even though I know you guys are like drowning in school work (esp. you, Jasmine Tan Sok Kai! :p). &again, I still can’t believe that you guys sabo-ed me onto the stage with Goodfellas! RAWR THAT WAS SO NOT EMBARRASSING KTHX.

No pictures this time around! Go FB to check ‘em out.

GOODNIGHT. c:

GOOD DAY. c:

Breakfast at 9am at Bukit Timah Food Centre, sponsored by the lovely MERVYN LIM &PHOON WAIKIT. Thanks guys! It’s so awesome, I’m becoming more &more Singaporean nowadays. Heh, &I finally know what Bar Chor Mee is! Stupid Mr. B kept making fun of me for not knowing what it is. Rawrrr I’m so gna smack him one day!

Then, I travelled all the way to Tampines at 12noon to watch boys chasing after a plastic ball with plastic sticks. So totally kewl, yo. SI’EN, I LOVE YOUUU! Thanks for accompanying me all the way there. You’ll definitely get a hugeee sloppy kiss from me on September 20th. I know you’re dying for one.

&BABY, thanks for this afternoon! Thanks for spending time with me &forcing me to watch G-Force! Talking hamsters are awesome. Not. HAHAHA <3 <3 <3

Anyways, I was supposed to have a family dinner at 6pm at my aunt’s house today. Apparently, it was held as an early farewell dinner for me, but I arrived 2 hours late at 8pm. Oh em gee, I felt so guilty, like seriously. All of my aunts and uncles got me tons of gifts. I got like a necklace and earrings from SK Jewelry, and one of my aunts even gave me S$500. Gosh, maybe I really should’ve just cabbed all the way down from Tampines to Jurong! :/

But overall, today was a good day. I hope the next 7 days would be just as great. I’m going to fill every day with meet-ups &dinner out &supper at Singapore’s best hawker centres.

THIS IS GOING TO BE A GOOD LAST WEEK.

-

P.S. Everybody I know who’s leaving seems to have ‘Leaving On A Jet Plane’ on repeat. HAHA I’M JUMPING ON THAT BANDWAGON TOO. YIPPEE. THE SONG’S ADDICTIVE. <3

ONE WEEK LEFT.

Time is REALLY running out. Why can’t some people recognize that too? It feels as if I’m the only one at panic mode right now, and I don’t understand why.

Meet up? Please? Try a little harder? For me? :c

Anyways, thanks Lynette for planning everything today! You know iheartchu right!

Spammed pictures again. $1.30 per shot? Screw that! Hahaha.

Meeting up with the class &talking to everyone again brought back so many memories. It really reinforced the idea that I would probably never be able to see most of my friends ever again. God, and I thought that I would be exhilarated to leave Singapore. How much more wrong could I have been?

Baby, you’re breaking my heart.

Met up with Lynette today! c:

Girl, I’m so gna miss you when I’m in London. I already miss all the awesome times we had in NJ. Thanks for being such an amazing friend.
I HEART CHU.

Anyways, the reason why Meryl’s in the picture above is cause she was feeling bored &decided to crash my date with Nette! Hahaha but I’m glad I got to spend time with both of them anyways. c:

RIGHT.

I went to the Army Open House again today!

Heehee, I was bored &had nothing to do in between 1-3pm. So, what better way to spend an afternoon than going to look at hawt army boys in their No. 4 uniform? Haha, just kidding! But anyways, thanks baby, for bringing me around today. c:  I heart all that army junk, like really. Hahaha ohyeah, Kaizhong was so awesome luhh. I bumped into him there &he showed me how to use this big gun thingy. LOL I MIZZ MY CLASS. :c

!@#$ ONLY 12 DAYS LEFT. OMGOMGOMG I’M PANICKING. I’m not ready to leave. No, not yet. &I’m especially not ready to leave you. :c Why in the world did I only meet you now? The gods must be laughing their divine asses off. Our lives are big cosmic jokes &we’re all stuck in our own perverted little tragedies. Fuck this, man.

My heart is breaking.

ARMY OPEN HOUSE ‘09.

It wasn’t too bad actually! Even though Meryl &I were not the least bit interested in any of the army stuff there, we still had a pretty good time (well, for me at least)!

I was actually supposed to go down with certain someone (EILEEN HO), but got ditched last minute because of said person’s hangover/laziness. Luckily Meryl agreed to go with me so spontaneously! I LOVE YOU MERYL NG GEK HUI. But of course, her wanting to see her very own tank boy helped a lot in her decision making too, I bet. Heeheehee. ;D

So anyways, the Open House was pretty fun, alright! Meryl &I kept getting approached to have our pictures taken by the photographers there. I think we got like 4 instant print-out pictures from them. &like, there was this freaky army boy who like chased us around the camp cause he wanted to give us a couple of freebie dog tags. Hahaha army boys are funny (or just plain desperate HAHAHA).

After the whole thing ended, Meryl &I went to Din Tai Fung for dinner. I swear, I am soo gna gorge myself on Xiao Long Baos before I leave; I need my fix of Chinese/Malay/Indian food nowww! Hahaha.

Highlights of the day:
Honey, you were so worth the trip. c:
A shot from one of the army photographers.Meet Mr. Army Mannequin!

Anyways, look what I found! Pictures of us at Lush yesterday, on Stomp! online.
It was a boring night. :c

I will miss this:
VERY MUCH.

Despite all my bullshit (that you guys have been putting up with since you first met me -heehee-) about desperately wanting to leave Singapore, I’m actually feeling really sad to go. Thanks for being such awesome friends for the past five years! c:

Anyways, I’ve lost all sensation in my toes. Yesterday’s LUSH bash was a bore, &partying afterwards at Phuture was tiresome. I think I didn’t get high enough! :c I really should’ve drank some more, but I know that there’s a really fine line between getting high &getting drunk. Not gna cross that line again! Haha.

Okay, I’m off to the Army Open House!

BYEEEE.

S brought me to Hard Rock Cafe last night! OMG it was so cool. The food was pretty good &the live band was awesome. I don’t know why S keeps wanting to spend so much money on me. Oh well, lucky me I guess. c:

Anyways, Kelv was such an ass yesterday. I was supposed to meet him, but I ended up playing cards at Arab Street with S &a couple of his other guy friends. Don’t ask, it’s a long story. Haha but hmm, I had a pretty good time in the end. c:

OMGOMGOMG it’s September 3rd today! Man, I’ve got to start packing. Time is not my friend.

“We’re Sendin’ Out / A Major Love / And This Is Our / Message To You (Message To You) / The Planets Are Linin’ Up / We’re Bringin’ Brighter Days / They’re All In Line / Waitin’ For You / Can’t You See . . .? / You’re Just Another Part Of Me” – Michael Jackson, “Another Part of Me”

You’re taking walk in your neighborhood and just up ahead you see a young, black couple walking with their children. A baby boy, happily being pushed in his stroller and a girl, maybe five or six. She’s got her hair in long plaits – one on the top and one on each side – and is wearing her favorite pair of Osh-Kosh overalls, a t-shirt and Reebok sneakers with double laces. As you move closer you watch her with fascination. She takes a couple steps ahead of her parents and brother, does a little wiggle, throws her arms out and pauses. After a few seconds, she moves ahead – touching a toe to the next square and pausing for effect. She spins and moves on to the next square. Again, pausing for effect, then doing her patented wiggle move. She continues to carefully makes her way up the sidewalk, pausing and dancing on each square. It’s cute – if not a little silly. Finally, her father stops and asks, “What are you doing?”

The little girl turns around, pokes her hip out to the right, and throws her hands up in exasperation. “Waiting for the sidewalk to light up, Daddy!”

That was me. Dancing up the sidewalk waiting for the squares to light up as they had for Michael Jackson in the “Billie Jean” music video. And I was the kid who almost broke her wrist trying to do the lean from the “Smooth Criminal” video. I practiced the moonwalk for hours on my kitchen floor in socks – and 20 plus years later, I still can’t do it. I sat and watched the “Thriller” video in it’s entirety – all 15 glorious minutes – and then burst out in tears when it was over. To this day, nobody in my family can confirm whether I was scared of the video or upset it was finished. Moreover, if the video comes on today, I still can’t turn my attention away.

Like the rest of the world, I was caught up in the magic of Michael Jackson. I knew all the words to all the songs; shoot, I probably still know the words, let’s be real. I would put on theatrical performances in my parents’ family room and the “Bad” album would be my soundtrack. I pretended to be in the “Black and White” video and have perfected the shoulder move Michael Jackson tried to teach the other MJ (Michael Jordan) in the “Jam” video.

Did I know him? No. But I loved him. Michael Jackson truly is the soundtrack to my life. My earliest memories are of dancing with my dad to “Thriller.” And learning the moves from the video. From doing routines with my baby sitter to “The Way You Make Me Feel.” I remember discovering the Jackson 5 on one of my dad’s Motown CD’s and playing “I Want You Back” so much that I broke the CD and had to buy my dad a new one. Michael Jackson was mine. He may have been yours too, but he was mine.

To this day, whenever I hear an MJ song come on, I turn to whoever is near me and say “you don’t know nothin’ about this.” Even to my parents. Because they don’t. Only I do. Michael Jackson moved people to their souls. He could do things that no others could do. He was an entertainer who brought pure, unadulterated, unmatched, sheer joy to anybody watching him. You can’t help but see him dance and sing and smile.

And for me, he brings back memories. My mind floods with memories. Of childhood and happiness and smiles and love.

He will always bring those memories back to me. And for that, I am grateful. No matter what others say about him, I’ll be thankful.

Thank you Michael Jackson.

You’re another part of me.

Signed,
He’s Still a Part of Me Barbie

In one week, I:

1. Marked finished a gazillion exam scripts
2. Keyed in a million billion marks into the school cockpit
3. Had a !@#$-ing awful day at school
4. Bought ‘The Best Present Ever’ at House of Condoms for N’s 21st
5. Met The Friends at PS Starbucks
6. Went to N’s 21st, stayed for 1hr
7. Went to Butter Factory with The Colleagues
8. Had a sweeeeet Saturday night/Sunday morning
9. Lost my phone on the cab home from Butter
10. Visited my Grandpa’s grave
11. Sent my Aussie aunt &uncle off at the airport
12. Received GBP50 from uncle (AWESUMZXZX)

+ more.

2 days left till I’m unemployed!

&finally, freedom.

I’ve been feeling so free these past few days. No more staying up till 4am/waking up at 2am to prepare lessons, no more fretting over how and what to teach, no more marking piles &piles of essays… This is how I should be enjoying my holidays. It’s amazing really. Today I did so many things that I haven’t done in like, forever. I watched two episodes of Chuck, spent hours online shopping, and finally, made use of my Photoshop, which had been laying dormant for the past three months. I am happy.

Anyways, yesterday was pretty fun. We went to watch Wolverine at PS, the enclave of thousands of bald book-out NS-men. Wolverine’s is a pretty good movie, but I bet that Star Trek would have been even better! ;D Heh, geeks ftw! Well, after the movie and dinner and dessert, I managed to convince Stevie, Merv and Waikit to go to Indochine with me. Teehee. (Jasmine, you’re coming along next time!) It was funny seeing WK’s face turn bright red after drinking. HAHAHA WK, you’re seriously the first person I’ve ever met who has that kind of reaction to alcohol. You is special, very special. ;)

LOL. Oh, the irony.

Thanks to everyone for the splendid birthday! Thanks for all the presents and surprises! You guys know that I heart you all right? Anyways, somehow this year, my birthday didn’t really feel like a birthday at all. I mean, it feels different now that my family didn’t celebrate my and my sister’s birthdays (my sister’s birthday is a day before mine). Somehow, even despite all the loving I got from my friends, my birthday still felt empty in a way. My dad didn’t even acknowledge our birthdays. Is it wrong to be disappointed in my dad for not showing affection in any way? Oh well, I’ve got to quit being a baby. I miss my mom. 

& 3 more weeks of teaching left! I’MA HANGING IN THERE.

“So many tears I’ve cried / So much pain inside / But baby it ain’t over til it’s over.” – Lenny Kravitz, “It Ain’t Over Til It’s Over

I know kids. It’s been a week. I was bad, very very bad. In Barbie’s defense, the nine to five turned into a five (as in a.m.) to nine (as in p.m.) these past couple of weeks. The new gig is fantastic, but you know when you’re supporting people who work half way around the world (literally) it wreaks havoc on your life. And, no, I’m not complaining, because I did sign up for it, I’m just saying

And, there have been lots of things going on. I actually signed up to do the online dating thing. There have been some studs and some duds. And one meeting thus far. And, this weekend I’m heading up to NYC to party with the young, fly and flashy. And, there’s a chance (a pretty good one) that the Scorpion King (I finally decided that I liked that nickname) will be in the building. I was also recently elected to the Board of Directors for an organization that I care deeply about and the Mafia and I switched our vacay from Mexico to the Cayman Islands this week (damn swine-bird-who the heck knows flu!). So yeah – like I said, there has been lots going on.

But I didn’t come here to write about that today. I came to write about dreams. Specifically my dreams. Well two dreams. The same two dreams I’ve been having over and over and over.

Preamble (shout out to D-Magic!): I’m creeping up on the one year anniversary of Black Tuesday (as I’ve decided to refer to the break-up day). I didn’t think it would bother me, but I’m finding it’s actually bothering me quite a bit.

So, the long and short of these dreams are that they both involve moving. The first one has Voldy and I breaking up (well maybe post break-up) and we’re walking through my house tagging everything that is his. It’s like a divorce and we’re dividing assets. The other dream has me picking up and moving and putting my condo on the market. The location is always different – Florida once, New York City, San Diego – but I’m always moving somewhere.

I ran both of the dreams by Mini Me and she had some pretty insightful thoughts. She said (and I quote) “sounds like the dream is pretty blatant. You’re moving on and you know it. Your life is becoming completely different from anything you had with [Voldy]. Completely foreign. Now, whether or not you’re ok with this… I’d say you’re not sure.” I think she’s pretty accurate in her interpretation. Especially about me not being sure about things moving in a completely different direction. What you have to understand is that when I was with him, I always, always, always figured that the spring of 2009 would be our year. That we’d get engaged because he’d be done with school, I’d be stable in my career, etc. and that life was going to begin for us then.

Clearly – this is not the case. And, I think, deep down inside I kind of thought that within a year he’d come to his senses. That he’d come back to me, tell me how young, dumb and stupid he was and beg for my forgiveness. Now, in my head, I always shut him down and tell him that there’s no chance that would ever happen. But, almost a year later, I’m not sure if that’s the truth. What if he’s the Big to my Carrie and no matter where I go and who I end up with it all circles back to him?

I’m pretty sure that’s not the case at all. When I really sit down and think about it, I don’t want him. It still hurts some days, but I don’t want him back. I think that maybe my dreams signify the finality of the situation. That, if things were going to go the way I (or he or we) planned, they’d already be going that direction. And they’re not. They’re moving in opposite directions and pretty swiftly. And, I think I’m just now getting to a point where I can accept that and be OK with it.

So, dear readers what do you think? Any ideas on what the dreams mean? And do you think anybody will notice if I just spend May 27 in bed all day. Really? I’d rather just go to sleep on the 26th and wake up on the 28th. That would be ideal.

You know the drill, way in below.

Signed,
I’m Finally Letting Go Barbie

P.S. I’m putting the video for “It Ain’t Over” down here because I love the song. And I remember being completely blown away to learn that it was Lenny Kravits and not like Marvin Gaye or somebody. I know completely random but worth the listen!

To continue the nostalgic theme of “things that are abandoning me” (and, because Shawny was giving me shit), let’s talk about the Spectrum for a moment.

For those of you who aren’t emotionally invested in Philadelphia sports and/or the general goings on of Comcast-Spectacor, the Wachovia Spectrum is the former home of the Philadelphia Flyers, Sixers and Wings, and current home to the Phantoms and Kixx. And, in a few months, it will be im(or ex—depending upon who you talk to)ploded to make way for Ed Snider’s newest venture, Philly Live.

I deem this unreasonable (and thus, worthy of this blog) for a number of reasons. First, the Spectrum is home to some of Philadelphia’s greatest sports moments. Throughout its 42 year history, the Spectrum has hosted a combined ten NHL and NBA championship series (we’re 3-7, two for the Flyers in ’74 and ’75, one for the Sixers in ’83). It’s seen the greats—Gretzky, Clarke, Chamberlain and Jordan. It saw the Flyers take down the Soviets in a pre-Miracle on Ice Cold War battle, and the Phantoms hoist their first Calder Cup as AHL sophomores. It’s seen rock legends, circuses, dancing muppets, and SummerSlams. And now, it’s going to become… a parking lot.

Okay, that might be a little bit of a stretch, but let’s be serious for a second. Does Mr. Snider honestly think he’s going to be able to finance Philly Live in this economic climate? Or, perhaps the better question is, does he think it will actually garner any legitimate financial returns within his lifetime? At the moment, my pessimistic high school economics comprehension is banking on ‘no’. And, of course, this doesn’t even begin to factor in how the good people of South Philadelphia will eventually respond to a “destination retail, dining and entertainment district” smack dab in the middle of their sports complex. I think they’d actually rather have a parking lot.

Am I bitter? Admittedly, yes. Some of my greatest hockey memories took place at the Spectrum—the 1995 semifinal sweep of the Rangers, enduring the bitter cold to stand in line for the Flyers Wives Carnival, countless Phantoms games with my teammates. The Spectrum is where I grew to love the game of hockey. My memories of sitting next to my dad and grandmom in the first row of the second level, analyzing penalty kill and power play systems, berating Mark Recchi for never being in position… they’re as vivid as my recollections of last night’s 5-2 win over the Sabers. Much like my relationship with Conan, seeing the Spectrum go will be losing another childhood friend.

But the defining issue that sways the Spectrum from “cry more, oh wistful one” to “fucking unreasonable” is how Comcast-Spectacor is handling all of this. They’ve dedicated a considerable amount of the organization’s time and funding to paying homage to the building. The Flyers and Sixers both scheduled throwback games, almost every Flyers game features a Spectrum season ticket holder memory, hell, there’s even a “Remembering America’s Showplace” theme to the tickets themselves! They’re acting like this isn’t their decision, like the hand of God Himself is forcing the Spectrum’s doors closed. No no, not us. We’d never do that to our baby. But hey… since we kind of are… do you want to buy a “Remember the Spectrum” t-shirt?

Now, I fully recognize that time marches on, oblivious to my astringent melancholy and inability to let go of my childhood, and that logistically, the Spectrum has to be torn down at some point. I’m merely contending that point doesn’t have to be right now. Because not only are they taking down at staple of Philadelphia sports history, they’re also ousting my current employer, the Phantoms.

With only ten home games left in the regular season, there has been much speculation as to what will become of the Phantoms after they play their final game at the Spectrum. (They were acquired by the Brooks group early last month.) As something of an insider, I can only say that I hope you AHL junkies like lutefisk, and let’s go Admirals.

That’s all I’ve got for now, but I’ll try to make a habit of updating more regularly. Until next time… all right, I love you, bye.

“I’m lookin’ forward to the future / But my eyesight is going bad / And this crystal ball / It’s always cloudy except for / When you look into the past . . .” – Fall Out Boy, “Thnks Fr The Mmrs”

I got the strangest voicemail the other day.  Totally weird.  It was from Jerrell who’s fine as hell.  It said that my friendship with him was causing a rift between him and his girlfriend, so we could no longer talk.  He said we’d always be friends but I shouldn’t call his phone any more.

That’s funny.

You called me last time.  Actually, it was your jealous girlfriend demanding to know who her man was texting.  In December.  It’s February.

Get your facts straight.

But, like the Genie, my wish is your command.  So, I deleted his phone number out of my phone.  And erased his missed call.  And his voicemail.  And, I’m horrible with phone numbers so I certainly don’t have it memorized. And since my parents are moving, it’s not like I’ll probably ever see you again.  It’ll be like we never knew each other.

I know what you’re thinking.  I’m having a drastic reaction to a phone message, right? But here’s what you have to understand about my relationship with Jerrell . . . I’ve been there for him in a way that most (I’d venture to say nobody) haven’t.  See – I’m about to put his business in the street, ya’ll – Jerrell was locked up for a time.  Over some BS.  Over a girl.  But, it was five years of his life none the less.  Did his father visit him?  No.  Did his brothers call him? No.  Did Country Club Barbie? Yes. I was in college, in DC, living my life, but I accepted every single collect call he made to me.  I wrote him letters keeping him posted on everything.  I was there. As nothing more than a good friend – but I was there.  Were his boys, The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse (don’t ask), there for him?  Nope.  But I was.

And I was there when he got out.  Helping him get on his feet and get things together. And you call me and tell me that some chick can’t handle our friendship?  That it’s better if we don’t talk?  Have it your way.

The same night I got the voicemail was the night I went to dinner with Mini Me.  We had a fantabulous time at one of my favorite restaurants in the city.  She and I have spent some time talking about birthdays.  Mine is coming up (it’s in a week!) and I make the biggest deal about my birthday out of everyone that I know.  My parents might only make a bigger deal – they still call me at 6:37 am every March 3rd. The point is, it’s usually big for me.  But this year, I’m thinking of keeping it low key.  Actually, I’d already decided to keep it low key.  I think, for my 26th, I just want to do something special for me.

As I was driving home from dinner, slightly tipsy from all that Shiraz and reeling from my random voicemail I decided exactly what I’d give myself for my birthday.  A new phone number. There really is no reason for me to keep my phone number.  My parents are moving.  And everybody has free long distance on their cell phones.  And, since I’m decidedly moving in a new direction it’s time that I cut some old things – and people – out of my life.

Remember when I mentioned that I have a hard time cutting people off?  That includes my phone number.  I don’t change it because I want someone who needs me to always be able to get to me.  Except – those people don’t really need me, do they? They’re using me because they know I’ll always be there. Except, this time I won’t be there.  It’s not because I hate him or don’t want to be his friend.  It’s because, I’m moving on.  In a new direction.  And sometimes, when you go to a new place, everybody is not meant to come with you. If there is anything I’ve learned over the past nine and a half months, it’s that.

And, the sooner I learn the lesson, the sooner I can be on my way.

So, dear readers, do you think my reaction is a little drastic?  Are you worried that you won’t get the memo when I get a new number? Or, do you think it’s OK for me to cut him off.  At least his girlfriend can’t be all crazy towards me, right?

Signed,
I’ll Still Have the Memories Barbie

Okay, so anyone who has known me for the past seven years or so knows I have a thing for Conan O’Brien. It started… hell, I don’t know when, probably around the time I stopped sleeping my junior year of high school. What began as a casual appreciation for Late Night and its lanky Irish host evolved into a full-fledged obsession within the span of a few weeks. I invested in Conan paraphernalia (magazines, buttons, a belt… not kidding), diligently watched the old Comedy Central reruns during my lunch period, and spent a painstaking amount of time on the Conan picture collages that (to this day) decorate my room. With the help of friend and colleague Carly Bondra, I even developed one of those old tripod websites in his honor. But it wasn’t just the man who captivated me—it was his work, a brand of comedy I hadn’t fully appreciated in my 17 years. Clutch Cargo. The Masturbating Bear. And, of course, the Walker Texas Ranger lever.

I was hooked on Conan from my junior year of high school through my sophomore year of college, watching every night, without fail. However, as with all obsessions, my religious following of Late Night has waned a bit in the past few years; whether that can be attributed to my evolving tastes in humor, conflicts in scheduling, or something else, I’m not quite sure. In the past few months, I’ve caught Conan once in a blue moon, usually only tuning in to his monologue and first skit. But last month, when I realized he only had a handful of episodes left before leaving for Los Angeles to host The Tonight Show, I made it a point to seek out my former-pretend-husband every weeknight.

In tribute to the show’s end, Late Night has, in the past couple of weeks, abandoned their standard monologue-skit-interview^2-indieband format for a more nostalgic look back on Conan’s 16 years at 30 Rock. They’ve covered everything from Triumph’s Star Wars debacle to the awkwardly hilarious ‘Mr. T and Conan go apple picking’. Special guests have popped up for short cameos—everyone from Conan’s matronly ex-con buddy Martha Stewart to late night rival Stephen Colbert, for a string dance off (be still my heart!). In returning to my 12:35 a.m. television watching habits, I’ve regained a part of my past that I’d almost forgotten about. Conan was an integral part of my high school years—up there with the Crocodile Hunter (sidenote: I almost burst into tears when he replayed the faux croc jump with Steve last night.). And tonight marks the end of that era. Sure, I’ve graduated and moved on, and I guess you could say Conan’s just doing the same thing. Onto bigger and better—or, at the very least, a new time slot. Still, my heart can’t help but break a little bit to see him leave for the west coast. It’s not unlike losing a childhood friend, one who is moving away, but swears he’ll keep in touch.

So here it is, not quite your Moment of Zen, but a plea, wrapped in a homage, baked into nostalgia… for Conan, on the eve of his last Late Night show:

It’s been a long, tumultuous, gracelessly hilarious ride, Conan, and I’ve been with you for a good part of it. I’m glad you’re getting a promotion, and the prestigious Tonight Show hosting job couldn’t have gone to a better person. It seemed like forever ago that I heard you were going to take over for Jay. 2009? Well, first we have to survive the Bush years, and then we can think about 2009. But, here it is, we’ve somehow endured, and it’s the day of your last show. After today, you’re off to California. Don’t forget to wear sunscreen, okay?

But as you leave New York for sunnier skies, a better time slot and a bigger paycheck, just promise me one thing, Conzie—don’t ever change. Keep knocking down that microphone. Keep the ridiculous impressions, ludicrous dancing, and that amazing, trademark hair. Don’t you ever, ever abandon those childish things— even if the President himself says so.

So toast with me, Conan. Here’s to the Evil Puppy, Vomiting Kermit, and Frankenstein Wasting a Minute of Our Time. Here’s to PimpBot, S&M Lincoln, and the Horny Manatee… to Jon Lovitz’s song, cooking with Ted Nugent, and the Huckabee Brawl. Here’s to Ahh-nold and his penis jokes, La Bamba and his gay jokes, and Triumph and his poop jokes. Here’s to sixteen years of awkward comedy that has brought more laughs, running jokes, and great memories than I can begin to recall.

As I write this, you’re taping your last show. I wish I could be there… although I seriously doubt anything related to you will ever eclipse that time you string danced just for me. But I promise I’ll be watching tonight, jumping, spinning and string dancing along with your intro, laughing with you as you play your best montages and clips, and bawling like a baby when you say your final goodnight to your loyal, silly 12:35 a.m. crowd.

Thanks for the memories, Conan. Can’t wait to see you take over L.A.

From/De: Microsoft & iNiS

Lips catalogue surpasses 70 songs only two months after the game’s launch

“Lips,” the newest singing party game from Microsoft and iNiS exclusively for Xbox 360, is keeping fans singing with nine new songs available on Xbox LIVE Marketplace and the “Lips” Get Music store starting January 16. The new tracks offer an eclectic selection for singers of various tastes and generations, and continue to expand the party game experience available on Xbox 360.

Single songs, including hits from Fall Out Boy, The Pussycat Dolls and The Cardigans will be available for purchase for between 160 and 180 Microsoft points each. The new offerings will boost the number of songs available on “Lips” to well over 70 by the end of the month. Fans can expect the title’s library to continue to expand throughout 2009 with new songs, videos and content announced regularly – just because the holidays are over, doesn’t mean the party has to stop!

Available on January 16

• When I Grow Up – The Pussycat Dolls*
• You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feelin’ – The Righteous Brothers**
• Erase/Rewind – The Cardigans*

Available on January 23

• Hate That I Love You – Rihanna feat. Ne-Yo**
• Thnks fr th Mmrs – Fall Out Boy*
• Look What You’ve Done – Jet*

Available on January 30

• Sunday Morning – Maroon 5*
• Take A Bow – Rihanna**
• Water Runs Dry – Boyz II Men*

*songs available for purchase for 160 Microsoft Points
**songs available for purchase for 180 Microsoft Points

answer the question pplz lol

I’m gonna make it bend and break
(It sent you to me without wait)
Say a prayer but let the good times roll
In case God doesn’t show
(Let the good times roll
Let the good times roll)

And I want these words to make things right
But it’s for wrongs that make the words come to life
Who does he think he is?
If that’s the worst you got, better put your fingers back to the keys

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Even though they weren’t so great
He tastes like you
Only sweeter
One night, yeah, and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Thanks for the memories
See, he tastes like you
Only sweeter

Been looking forward to the future
But my eyesight is going bad
And this crystal ball
It’s always cloudy
Except for when you look into the past
One night stand
One night stand, off

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Even though they weren’t so great
He tastes like you
Only sweeter
One night, yeah, and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Thanks for the memories
See, he tastes like you
Only sweeter

They say
“I only think in the form of crunching numbers
In hotel rooms
Collecting page six lovers”
Get me out of my mind
Get you out of those clothes
I’m a letter away
From getting you into the mood
Whoa

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Even though they weren’t so great
He tastes like you
Only sweeter
One night, yeah, and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Thanks for the memories
See, he tastes like you
Only sweeter

One night and one more time (One more night, one more time)
Thanks for the memories
Even though they weren’t so great
He tastes like you
Only sweeter
One night, yeah, and one more time (One more night, one more time)
Thanks for the memories (For the memories)
Thanks for the memories (For the memories)
See, he tastes like you
Only sweeter