The attributes of Horse Racing class are these.
Speed
Stamina
Determination

At racetracks large, medium, and small class and speed are strongly correlated; that is, better horses run faster. So speed figures do represent class differences much of the time, but not always, not by a wide margin.

Class is never unimportant, but class is frequently more decisive at 1m+ races (stamina) and in better races (determinations). It’s most decisive in stakes races and on the grass.

Class analysts want to know first of all whether horses are suited to today’s level of competition.

What kind of horses should be preferred at today’s class level?
What kind of horses can be eliminated as outclassed at today’s class level?

A perfectly legitimate way to answer each question is to become familiar with the kinds of horses that most frequently win in the regular-run races. In the “Handicapping Methods” section under “Class Evaluation” I will describe the kinds of horses punters prefer in every type of race.

At handicap races, “the prize money to winner” is an indicator of relative class, but matters are more complicated than that. Punters must grapple effectively with rises in class and drops in class.

One of the tricky aspects of class evaluation concerns horses that move from handicap races to non-handicap races, and vice versa. Studies of par times at the various class levels indicate which rises and drops might be successful, and which should not.

Evaluating shippers on class is partly a function of track class, partly a function of comparing speed figures, and partly a function of knowing the quality of opposition horses have beaten.

Three-year-olds must be evaluated on class radically differently from horses 4+ years old.

Juveniles, the Two-year-olds, are best evaluated on speed, not class. Two-year-olds usually run as fast as they can for as long as they can. The fastest Two-year-olds figure to win.

I have slept 8 hours in a row for the past 5 nights.

Here’s how the miracle went down:

• Eldyn has the complete hang of sleeping through the night now. Since his doctor’s appointment last week, I’ve even given up his “dream feed” — the one at 10 or 11 or before I go to sleep.
• On Sunday morning, I heard Hiram wake up at his usual early time. Then I heard him go to the bathroom all by himself. Then I fell asleep again and only woke up 45 minutes later because Hiram was standing by our bed telling us he had been downstairs “making” himself a banana and playing in the living room. By himself. While we slept.

It might just be that I am high on sleep, but I am very excited about this new era in the Barrows household. Now let’s just hope my post doesn’t jinx it all.

My Jack Russell is very that way, always getting himself painted, dyed, and colored. He is the master of mischief and fall seems to be when he gets into the most trouble! We will be going to our first pumpkin patch this year! Hopefully for a little photoshoot, but here is some photos from last year.

Oh and just on the hush hush – I will be beginning the next set of Tem Tem Teru stories: The Yearly Adventures of Tem Tem Teru which goes through the holidays and his many friends of mythical and magical beings. Keep watch for sneak peaks and little updates. We are almost finished with the first book which will be going to publishers hopefully by October! Just doing the cover and final tweaks now! .

And one more thing – The nieces have decided that Tem Tem Teru is officially going to be Indiana Jones this Year! My oh My where am I going to get that costume!

By For Now!

Today, as she was telling me about how her year is going so far in 5th grade, I mentioned that my little guy just started school, too. She said, “Oh no! Aren’t you lonely?”

I politely said, “No, it gives me time to get things done.” To which my son added, “Yeah, when I go to school Mommy eats and drinks and cleans.”

And then she said, “What do you do all day?”

I told her a brief overview of our schedule, saying, “Well, after we wake up I drop him off at school and then come home to do some cleaning. After I pick him up we eat lunch and have quiet time and then play outside for most of the afternoon. Then it’s time for dinner, bath, and bed.”

She just nodded but I kind of felt like I was being judged for not doing enough. By a 5th grader.

So, here’s the breakdown of what I actually did today. It’s probably going to be really long and boring, so you can stop reading now if you like. I guess I need to write it down as much for my own sense of accomplishment as for needing to tell the story.

8:00 AM: Wake up Noah. Brush his teeth, get him dressed, get him downstairs and set up with a cereal breakfast. Note that getting a toddler dressed is not as simple as “getting dressed.” It involves a lot of coaxing, hands on work, and sometimes bribery.

8:30 AM: Return back upstairs to get myself dressed. Which means throw on something somewhat presentable and put hair in a ponytail.

8:45 AM: Gather up all needed supplies and go out to car to put child in car seat. I had packed his snack and school bag the night before.

9:00 AM: Drop Noah off at school. Drive to Starbucks.

9:15 AM: Go to grocery store.

10:00 AM: Get gas.

10:30:AM: Return home, unload groceries. Do dishes, start a load of laundry, scoop the cat litter, straighten living room. Notice that the china cabinet is leaning a funny way and rearrange its contents.

10:55 AM: Head upstairs to do some cleaning. Which involved: putting away all toys, dusting all surfaces of Noah’s room, making up Noah’s bed (which takes forever), vacuuming his entire room including baseboards.

Then I moved on to the bathroom and since I was in an organizing mood I re-organized all of the upstairs bathroom cabinets including wiping them down, designating things to other places, and throwing things away. Then I dusted all bathroom surfaces and the upstairs hallway.

Moving on to our bedroom, I put all of the clothes in the closet, made up our bed, dusted, and vacuumed.

12:20 PM: Quickly run downstairs, grab keys, and go pick up my child.

12:35 PM: Arrive at school to an excited toddler and listen to his stories about school and soccer. Drive us home for lunch and to let him watch one episode of “Peep and Duck” while I also try to cram in lunch in between switching the laundry load, making Noah’s lunch, and sorting through his school bag.

1:20 PM: Read Corduroy to Noah. He requests, “Again, Mommy!” We read it 3 times.

2:00 PM: After 3 stories and much arguing from the toddler I finally get him to lay down for quiet time. (We are past napping.)

2:20 PM: Noah decides he is done with quiet time and jumps up to play. I reluctantly get up.

I’m not sure of the rest of the time-table for the afternoon, but at some point the mailman comes and we read the mail. We play with leftover yellow birthday balloons. (Yellow birthday party pics coming soon!) We line up magnets. We pretend to fix computers. We have a chasing session. We also go upstairs briefly to get a book (I thought) but instead the toddler sees what I have done to his room and promptly unmakes the bed and arranges his blankets into some kind of fort on the floor. Sigh. We cuddle. We laugh. We marvel at the size of my son’s poot and I wipe his bottom. We vacuum the living room and I switch laundry again.

Around 4:00 we have a snack and then decide to go outside. That is when we run into our neighbor and she comes over to play. She plays with us while we ride tricycles, take a neighborhood walk, swing, slide, and ride scooters.

5:30 PM: Neighbor leaves and we come inside for dinner. Except that transition results in a MAJOR tantrum screaming fit and we do not actually make it inside until 6:00. Ridiculous.

6:00PM: Toddler has a personality change and says, “I will be nice now, Mommy.” What the….?

6:30 PM: I serve a lovingly prepared meal of hotdogs and grapes (for Noah) and a Healthy Choice microwaveable meal (for me.) Cooking is not my thing. I also prepare my son’s snack for school tomorrow.

7:00 PM: I put the toddler in a bubble bath. We make “party decorations” with wash cloths and play with a toy shark and lizard. I wash his hair and we sing silly bath time songs.

After drying off and putting on pajamas we brush teeth and cuddle up in my bed to read Corduroy one more time. There is no trying to get him in his own bed on nights when Daddy isn’t home. We also read Brown Bear Brown Bear What Do You See and an Elmo book. We then get all snuggled up, I turn off the light, and my little guy drifts off to sleep.

8:00 PM: I leave the toddler and come to my computer to catch up on email, which involves a lot of correspondence I need to deal with for my new role of Parent Council Chair at my son’s preschool. I alternate between working on that, checking Facebook and Twitter, and trying to catch up on blogging (which I am terribly behind on.)

8:55 PM: The toddler wakes up. I comfort him and am able to return to the computer work after about 15 minutes.

9:30 PM: The toddler wakes up again and this time does not settle easily. After rocking, singing, and getting him water he finally drifts off into a deep sleep right before 10:oo.

Before I can settle at my computer again I go to let the cats in that have been left outside in the rain that just started. Oops. They are ok. Just a bit wet and mad.

Now, after 10:00 PM, I am finally hoping to get caught up on Parent Council emails, some blogging, and some social media. I hope to be asleep by midnight.

Of course, this isn’t the way it is everyday. There are some days when I clean other parts of the house or run other errands or go shopping. There are some days I pay bills or make house administrative phone calls or deal with some pressing paperwork issue. There are some days when I choose to actually take some me time while Noah is at school. After today, I am hoping tomorrow might be one of them! There are some days when my husband is around. There are some days Noah does not have school and we do play dates or go to parks or the children’s museum. There are also some days I actually get adult interaction.

But most days, this is a good description of my life. This is currently day 11 of no husband home to help. He is a medical resident and his current schedule is a stretch where his shortest shift is 12 hours, but most days it has been 16. Either way, it means he’s gone before we wake up and home after we are asleep.

I don’t mean this to be list of complaints. I love getting to spend so much time with my son. I love that I am able to have such a clean house. I love that I can go get Pumpkin Spice lattes. I love evening walks and cuddles with my little guy. But days like today are the perfect descriptor as to why my life is both elating and exhausting.

And that, my friends, is what I did all day.

How did you spend your day?

I barely slept the night before. I tossed and turned and hugged my little boy tight throughout the night as he slept beside me in bed. I woke up early and dressed myself and my son and slowly carefully drove the 12 minutes it takes to get from our house to our destination.

It was my son’s first day of school.

He was only going to a two-day-a-week preschool program from 9-12, but it was the first time he had ever been away from me. He had never had a babysitter and I rarely even let family watch him. To be honest, he had never even been with my husband alone for more than 4 hours. The school separation was going to be a huge deal, for both of us.

When I dropped my son off in 2011, he screamed and cried and I finally had to leave him crying there while I walked out under the teacher’s advisement that he would stop crying and settle more quickly if I was gone. This, I knew was true. I used to be a teacher, after all. But it didn’t make it any easier for me to be the mommy that had to leave my crying baby nearly in tears myself.

With mixed emotions of apprehension and excitement, I drove away from the school and went to Starbucks. I ordered a Pumpkin Spice Latte, and made myself comfortable in one of the bar seats facing the window. I watched as people scurried to work or shopped at the outdoor mall. I felt pangs of quilt and frivolity for the luxury of being able to people-watch on a Thursday morning when most people were working or in school. I felt unencumbered and oddly uneasy with my new-found alone time.

After trying to enjoy my latte and spending a little too much time in my own head, I decided it was time to leave Starbucks. Except it was only 10:15. And so I drove to my son’s school and sat in the parking lot until noon, anxiously awaiting pick up time. I just did not know what to do without him for that long. I felt like a piece of me was missing.

This year, at this time, I was ready.

As it turns out, I got pretty used to my two mornings off a week last year. I spent most of last year re-discovering my identity outside of motherhood and I felt pretty exhausted after a long summer with very few breaks from constant toddler care.

The night before, my son slept in his bed while I slept in mine, (for the first half of the night anyway).

This year, my son is going into the three-year-old class three days a week from 9-12, but with extra curricular activities of soccer, art and gymnastics after school each day, so I will be picking him up at times ranging from 12:30 to 1:00pm. His school is no longer a new environment, but a trusted and nurturing one.

We were both excited for school and I may have driven a little over the speed limit to get us there.

I walked my son in and dropped him off in his new classroom. Though he was a little hesitant and a bit nervous when we arrived, he became distracted with washing his hands in the new (to him) big boy bathroom in the three-year-old class. I gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, said, “Mommy loves you,” and slipped away with no tears from either of us.

This year, I went straight to Starbucks, ordered my Pumpkin Spice Latte, and drove home to my house where I set up my laptop, lit a candle, and spent some time enjoying the fall weather, listening to music, blogging, and soaking up every second of my blissful alone time.

This year, I may or may not have been a few minutes late to pick him up.

What a difference a year makes.

Noah’s first days of school. Left: 2011, 2 years old, apprehensive. Right: 2012, 3 years old, attitude.

Noah playing with play dough at school Left: 2011 Right: 2012

It’s a Monday. Re has a slow-motion morning. Misses bus. OPU offers to drop us, but works in even slower motion and we eventually land up at school an hour late.
Teacher asks Re, “Why are you late?”.
He replies, “Because the bus was not there!”

***

Ninni time. Am reading to Re. He is distracting me by pointing to his bruises and scabs. “Look mamma, lion bit me here, and tiger bit me here, and cheetah bit me here and cocodiling bit me here.”
“Really?” I say. “And muksito bit me here,” I point to an imaginary spot.
“Wait mamma, let me sing Flee Fly Muksito and shoo them away!”

***

Post a play-date, Re and I walk back to our waterlogged building. “So many waters are there,” he said, while he waded through — gumboots, raincoat etal. It makes me smile and feel grateful. For the rain. For water. For life.

***

“Come let’s have a bath,” I tell Re. ”We have to drive all the germs away,”, I say dramatically.

He slaps his body at a few places and says, “mamma, I shooed the germs away. No need for bath.”
Somebody help!

***

So I convince Re that we haffto go to school even though “it’s still night time mamma,” only to be accosted by a fallen tree where the bus stop is at. I go into my quick plan B mode, making calls, asking the driver to reroute the bus. We are told that we have to walk to the next diversion which seems a few miles away in the downpour. As I lead him away from the scene of the crime, I sense a tug.
“Mamma, the tweee is boken mamma, let’s put sticky tape on it.”
I was like fuck the tape, let’s just flee, but I realised I was a mom now, so I went, “Okay, you go to school, and by the time you come back, I will put sticky tape on it.”

***

Me to Re: So your teacher tells me you have been dancing in school?
Re: No mamma, I was not dancing in the skooooool, I was dancing in the class onwy.

***

“Chotabim onwy eating laddoos. He not eating veggiables,” Re declared one day.
Dear chotabim’s mamma, we need to talk. What veggiables, I will make your boy eat fruitables and anyables.

***

It’s a scrabble Sunday. I had lousy letters, so my first word was DIP.  said, “no mamma, make a bigger one!”
A few words later, I had PERVADE. “Yay, you did it!” he exclaimed.
Thank you scrabble god!

***

We’re very happy to introduce our first guest blogger, Redleaf Press® author Connie Bergstein Dow. She is the author of

Without further ado, here’s Connie!

Hello!

My name is Connie Bergstein Dow. I am excited to be a part of the Redleaf Press blog! I look forward to sharing my experience in the field of dance with early childhood educators, because I feel strongly that all children should have the opportunity to participate in the arts. First, I would like to introduce myself and give you some information on my background.

When I was young, I was very flexible and had a difficult time getting my body to move in an integrated way. My mother said I used to trip over the patterns in a carpet! Gym class was an intimidating experience for me, and I was virtually always the last person chosen for sports teams. My parents signed me up for dance classes to help me to develop balance, strength, and coordination. This wonderful opportunity was my introduction to the art form of dance. I found that I loved to dance. It was the vehicle through which I learned physical skills and body control; it gave me self-confidence and a voice to express myself; and ultimately led me to a life-long career.

Photo courtesy of Connie Bergstein Dow

I grew up in Cincinnati and went to Denison University and then on to graduate school at the University of Michigan. I had a professional performing career for about 12 years, which took me from Michigan, to Venezuela, Guatemala, New York, and finally back to Cincinnati. I have been fortunate to be able to continue working in the field of dance as a teacher, writer, and workshop provider, with over 40 years of experience.

My dance journey has been rich and rewarding. I have studied this art form from many angles, from training, performing, teaching, and writing, to being an informed and appreciative audience of all types of dance. I have developed an understanding of the importance of movement in our lives. I continue to share my passion for dance by giving workshops to early childhood professionals who want to bring dance to children in their classrooms and centers. I demonstrate classroom management techniques that are inherent in the art form to show teachers that children can learn valuable skills such as body control, space awareness, and working in a group. Dance can be used to teach virtually any subject across the curriculum, while addressing early childhood learning standards. I feel strongly that dance, and the other arts, are not “extras;” they are essential and transformational forces in our lives.

Photo courtesy of Connie Bergstein Dow

Movement is something that children want and need to do, and that teachers enjoy once they become comfortable offering movement sessions. Perhaps best and most importantly, there are countless benefits for the children who participate in creative movement activities.

In saying goodbye for today, I would like to leave you with some food for thought — a brief summary of some of the wonderful benefits of creative movement for children.

Guided movement sessions can:

TEACH

• Early Literacy and Language Skills
• Mathematics and Counting
• Science and Social Studies
• Concepts such as Colors, Shapes, and Opposites

DEVELOP

• Self-Control and Body Awareness
• Spatial Awareness
• Group Cooperation
• Listening, Understanding, and Responding to Instructions
• Reasoning and Problem-Solving Skills
• Self Expression
• Creativity
• Large Motor Skills
• Life-Long Healthy Habits

Keep on dancin’!

Connie

Photo courtesy of Connie Bergstein Dow

Want to dance? Check out Connie’s books, One, Two, What Can I Do? Dance and Music for the Whole Day and Dance, Turn, Hop, Learn! Enriching Movement Activities for Preschoolers, and stay tuned for more from Connie.

Montessori Fun Windsor, Ca

Back in the day of cloth diapers and stay at home Moms, potty training wasn’t as issue. Mom’s were more than happy to give up using, washing and drying diapers and plastic pants and the children learned quickly. When their diaper was wet or dirty it smelled, felt cold were bulky and uncomfortable. Moving on was no problem. Rare was the child that didn’t potty train at age
2 or 2 1/2 at the latest.

But it’s a new day, we have  DVDs, movies in the car and  at home,  super car seats to keep them safe, computers, GPS, wonderful slim and light car seats that transfer to the stroller and to a carry around, many fabulous inventions for babies. And, we have cruisers, and pull ups— huge, jumbo sized disposable diapers that are slim, form fitting, adorned with their favorite characters, and made to soak up wetness like it was never there. No odor, easy velcro closures and just throw it in the trash and replace every few hours, or couple times a day as needed or when you get around to it.
As a preschool teacher I am aghast at  how drastically the trend has changed over the past couple years and through clever marketing on the part of disposable diaper companies. The parents seem to think that the way to potty train is to keep them in disposables as long as possible and that the next natural step is the transition into pull-ups, which are even more expensive, and then finally into underwear— and don’t rush them! Children are now staying in diapers,( including pull-ups which ARE diapers- fancy expensive diapers) an extra year or so longer than the previous generation of cloth diaper users. A year more of expensive for the parents, a year more of profit for the diaper companies, a year more of toxic waste for the landfills- for each child. How many million children do we have here in the USA?

Who is benefiting from this trend??? Certainly not the earth. Not the family budget in these hard times.. The child certainly does not benefit. Well meaning parents  either really don’t know what to do regarding potty training, or they don’t take the time to deal with it.  Children are still in diapers until 3 and 4 or even longer.  Barring physical reasons that are preventing toilet learning, this is way too long. Children are super smart and capable. As with any other discipline, we need to use it as a firm and loving teaching moment and pair that  with the cause and effect that can only be learned by wearing cloth diapers, underwear or going naked to connect them with their own bodily functions and how it feels to be wet or soiled, how it feels before it happens and after, and to connect them all.  It’s not rocket science . It is a natural and fabulous part of growing up! It’s a skill just like walking and talking and learning to eat with a spoon. It’s time to tell the diaper companies, “enough!” and cut the pull ups out of toilet training.  They are like the middle man, a made up transitional diaper that prolongs the process and increases the company profits at a huge rate. We don’t need them.

The first year of life brings so many changes, but it has been this year between two and three that I have seen the most growth in you.

It has been this year, my sweet boy, that you have stopped nursing, have fully potty trained, and started sleeping in your own bed. (Some nights.)

It has been this year that you have stopped referring to yourself as “baby” and instead say “Noah.” You have even learned how to spell your name and proudly walk around saying “I am N-O-A-H Noah!” You have even learned to write the letters “O” and “H.”  My heart swells every time.

It has been this year you have decided you want to be a “digger man” when you grow up, and in the last few months you have changed your aspiring profession to “actor.” I will be proud of you no matter what you choose.

It has been this year that you have gone to your very first year of preschool, two mornings a week from 9 to 12. It was the very first time that you had ever been away from me, and though it was hard for both of us at first, we have both thrived with the expansion of your world.

It has been this year that I have seen you develop real relationships with your friends as you have moved from parallel play to interactive games.

It has been this year that you have mastered your motor skills. I’ve never been more proud of someone jumping in puddles or riding tricycles.

This year, you have established family roles. “Daddy is the cooker, Mommy is the cleaner, and I am the helper.” ~Noah summer 2012

Though you have always been a strong verbal speaker and communicator, this year your vocabulary has expanded and your thoughts are always expressed in complex sentences. I am often amazed at the way your mind works, and especially at the way you are able to tell me about it.

“Mommy, I have a story. Once upon time, there was a kitty cat and it got up up stuck on the roof. And the helicopter came and got the kitty cat and put it down. And then everybody was happy. The End.” 

“Wow, Noah, that was such a good story! It had a beginning, a middle, and an end. It also had a conflict and a resolution.” 

“Yes, Mommy, it did.” 

~August 2012

I love hearing your stories, your thoughts, and your opinions. I trust your judgement and often include you on family decisions. I want you to know that I value you, always.

It has been this year that I have seen you cross over from baby to boy, and this year that has challenged me the most as a parent. (So far.)

But it has been this year, my sweet boy, that I have delighted in your growth. As you continue to grow and branch out away from me, I want you to always know that I will never be too far away, standing in awe of wonderful YOU.

I love you forever and always, my sweet three-year-old baby boy.

Love,

Mommy

(meant to be published on your 3rd birthday, September 1st, 2012)

My sweet 3 year old boy

• Identify feelings in themselves and others
• Understand that feelings change over time and are not permanent
• Separate their feelings from their actions

Self-regulation is important for all children and a skill they’ll use throughout their lives. As children gain a deeper understanding of their feelings, they can begin to learn how to manage their emotions. Additionally, they will learn how to express their feelings to others and use assertive language instead of impulsively striking out when they are upset. Research shows that the ability to self-regulate is one of the most important predictors of later academic success.

If you are working with a child who has trouble managing his or her feelings or is quickly overwhelmed and out of control, try using some of these tips from Beyond Behavior Management: The Six Life Skills Children Need, Second Edition.

Use supportive interactions to help children understand their emotions

The ways we respond to children’s emotions and the conversations we have with children about emotions helps them form the foundation for emotional intelligence.

• Use a rich emotional vocabulary to help children discriminate between and label the wide range of emotions they experience. Help children build a broad emotional vocabulary with words such as annoyed, confused, generous, joyful, worried, bored, embarrassed, ignored, safe, calm, excited, impatient, and unafraid.
• Point out to children what triggered their joy or notice aloud that they no longer seem sad to help them learn that emotions come and go.
• Interact in calm and controlled ways with children who experience strong emotions to send the message that emotions are nothing to be feared.

Respond to children’s emotions

Listening with compassion and understanding to a child’s emotions supports the adult-child relationship. It also increases emotional literacy and boosts the child’s sensitivity to the feelings of others.

• Listen carefully to children’s words to hear whether they are asking for information or emotional support. When a child uses the words who, what, when, where, why, and how, he or she is usually looking for information, not empathetic responses.
• When you hear a sentence that expresses a feeling, reflect the feeling back. Name the feeling in your answer to help children begin an emotional vocabulary.
• Let the child know you are really listening, you care, and you will help her express her strong feelings. As you empathize with children and model respect for the feelings of others, you are also planting the seed for the child’s development of his own empathy for others.

Name and validate feelings

Strive to name and validate all the feelings — the “good” and the “bad” — that children express in your classroom. A good way to validate feelings is to reflect back to children your best guess about what they are feeling while withholding any judgment. For example, instead of saying, “Pouting isn’t going to get you anywhere,” try, “It looks like you want to use the soccer ball first.” Instead of saying, “There’s nothing to be upset about,” try, “I can see you’re upset, and I understand.”

Help children understand that feelings are responses

As children become aware of cause and effect, you can begin to help them understand that their emotions stem from an outside cause. Not only do events and other people affect them, but they themselves have an influence on the feelings of others as well. Try weaving the following sentence templates into your daily language with children to guide them to make the connections:

• When outside events have an impact on their feelings, say, “You feel (emotion) because (event).” (“You feel excited because Josie is coming for supper.”)
• When other people’s actions have an impact on their feelings, say, “When (person) (action), you felt (emotion).” (“When David shared his blocks, you felt happy.”)
• When their actions have an impact on other people’s feelings, say, “When you (action), (other person) felt (emotion).” (“When you pushed Denise, she felt hurt.”)

Of course, there is much more to discuss as you help children learn to manage their emotions. For more information on self-regulation and five other skills (attachment, belonging, collaboration, contribution, and adaptability) — as well as classroom ideas, activities, and interactions — check out Beyond Behavior Management: The Six Life Skills Children Need, Second Edition, by Jenna Bilmes.

Tell us: What tips do you have to help children learn empathy for others?

It’s fun to be line leader, but sometimes it’s nice to let someone else lead.

Singing and dancing and playing are very important parts to the day.

It’s exciting when someone comes to visit. It changes the schedule, but it’s fun and exciting!

There’s always time to be silly and to laugh.

Take time out of each day to read.

There’s a place for everything like books and toys and blocks. If we put things away, they’ll last longer and we’ll find them again.

Welcome your friends with a smile and a hug!

It’s important to share even when we don’t want to do so.

When you fall, it’s nice to have someone there to help you up and give you a hug.

All it takes to start a friendship is someone to play with and to share.

It’s nice to hold hands before crossing the street or just because we like each other.

Eating is a good way to spend time together.

We might be upset because we’re hungry or tired or haven’t had a chance to run around outside.

It’s important to let others know how important they are to us.

The reason we were in the emergency room, however, was neither smart nor responsible.  

“You ate what?”  

“A Micro Machine”, was the answer. 

I stared in disbelief as I tried to image swallowing a tiny car about the size of a peanut.  My instincts screamed, “No way, not possible”.  As an adult, I would have a hard time swallowing one – but a three-year old?  No way.

“Are you SURE you swallowed a Micro Machine?” I asked foolishly.   A nod was the only response.  

“Are you in any pain?” I asked.   She shook her head no, but the tears started coming to her little eyes.

The ER was hopping, as usual, on a Friday night.  I know the way it works – You claim LEFT ARM PAIN, and blammo – you’re through triage and being worked on immediately.  You claim BAD CUT – you’re dead last in line.  Surprisingly, a swallowed Micro Machine ranked pretty high on the Triage nurse’s list of maladies.  That scared me.

The ER doctor was serious when he came in to see us.  “Are you SURE you swallowed a Micro Machine?” he asked foolishly.  An affirmative nod was all he got for an answer.   He looked at me.  I shrugged the stupid-dad-shrug, which means: “How the hell should I know!”   His shoulders drooped a bit as he gave up the cross examination and ordered the X-rays.

“Hold still little girl”, said the X-ray technician, as if a three year old can hold still on an X-ray table.  Frustrated, the technician brings out the lead apron and slings it on me.  “You’ll have to hold her still so we can get a good look.” 

I’m thinking to myself – How good a look do you need to identify a TOY CAR in someone’s stomach?

After having my forearms irradiated three times, we finally got a “good-enough” look.

Back to the ER to wait for the Radiologist to “read” the X-rays.   Again, I’m thinking to myself – you need a specialist to identify a die-cast metal car in a child’s body?   Anyone with eyes should be able to do it!

We waited.  I paced.  My car-eating angel slept.   It was taking a long time, even by Friday night ER standards.  I started to get nervous.   Oh great, I thought, the doctors must be calling in a GI guy for emergency surgery to remove the car.  It must be lodged in her intestines!  The longer it took, the more nervous I got.

Just after 1am, the ER doctor came back to see us with a very serious (or very tired) expression.  “Little girl – Did you eat a toy car?”  He asked as he stared her into her little eyes.

“No.  Can we go home now, Daddy?”

Here in the Oopsiemumma Household we like to do things a little differently and defy the odds. So, instead of our munchkins going through the Terrible Two’s, they decided to sail through two and then turn it on when they turned three.

I’m calling it the “Threatening Three’s.” This is the age in Oopsiemumma land that threatens my sanity, my patience, my resilience and my ability to not throw a tantrum myself.

I have to give it to Master Sporty, he wasn’t very good at the whole throw a tantrum thing, he clearly didn’t get given the toddler handbook. His idea of a tantrum was to take himself to his room and either read a book or throw himself on his bed and lay there…what a monster he was! If monster’s like to read books and lay still……

Miss Princess, on the other hand, has us cracking open all the parenting help books known to mankind. The one I’m about to crack open this week is the “Strong-willed child”. I think the title should be more along the lines of “How not to lose it in public when dealing with a strong-willed child.” Now THAT would be much more helpful.

But all these tantrums and shenanigans that Miss Princess carries on with have made me realise that not only did Master Sporty fail on the tantrum front, but there are a whole host of tantrums I never realised existed. Here are some of Miss Princess’s favourites:-

• “Screaming vomiter” – this one is awesome and yet quite simple. You scream and scream and scream and scream until you start projectile vomiting EVERYWHERE. Then you stop…and then you scream some more.

• “Urinator” – when mummy and daddy refuse to give in then you stand still and defiantly wee all down your legs, regardless of where you are. Little tip though, it’s much more effective inside than outside the house, and particularly fun in shopping centres.

• “Neverending Story” – this is where the tantrum n.e.v.e.r seems to end. Coupled with the “Public performer” and the “Floor writher” it can be quite an awesome event to watch.

• “Floor writher” – most effective in shopping centres where it’s harder for mummy and daddy to bend down and pick you up without showing their underwear (mummy needs to learn not to wear tight jeans to shopping centres).

• “Sibling slammer” – want a quick reaction from mummy and daddy? The most effective technique is while throwing a tantrum you kick, hit, pinch, bite or jump on your sibling…then watch how quickly you get a reaction. Quite a good one!

• “Wall smacker” – this one is quite self-explanatory though will cause some pain if mum and dad take the attitude that ‘she’ll stop it when it hurts’. Ouch.

• “Car seat kicker” – guaranteed to get mummy cranky when feeling like some attention. Just kick, kick, kick and kick until she threatens to take away your dolls. Then it’s probably a good idea to stop and start on the “sibling slammer” for fun.

• “Toy tosser” – particularly effective when in the car. Bonus points if you actually hit mummy in the head.

• “Lounge collapser” – save this one for when you’re too tired to actually throw a tantrum. Just throw yourself on the lounge and cry. Usually causes more giggles than sympathy from the grown-ups.

• “Door slammer” – couple this with a well-timed scream and mummy and daddy come running thinking your fingers are toast.

• “Public performer” – still working on this one because mummy tends to walk off and pretend she doesn’t know me. But when done with the “Urinator” or the “Screaming Vomiter” she has no choice but to come and get me

It’s no wonder I’m exhausted most days when I have to deal with at least one or two from the above list. And I may or may not be counting down until Miss Princess trundles off to kindergarten next year, where for two days of the week the above list is NOT MY PROBLEM.

No doubt thought that she’ll be an angelic angel at kindy…

Do you have any tantrum’s to add? If so, then I can assure you that your little one and Miss Princess will never meet, she has a large enough repertoire all on her own.

Oopsiemumma xo

I’ve been a nanny for over a decade now, and I’ve encountered my share of toddlers, mainly three year olds.  There should really be an award or trophy you get for either raising a three year old without leaving them on someone’s doorstep or being a nanny to one and not locking them in a closet for a few hours.

Three year olds are their own special breed.  Most people lament over the “terrible two’s”, but really, it’s three year olds that will turn you grey, give you wrinkles and cause you to curl up in the fetal position while rambling incoherently.  I blame this little joke of nature on the sudden appearance of a broad vocabulary and reasoning skills, all at the same time.  When children realize they can communicate effectively, they go power hungry and your could become rich if you had a dollar for every time you heard “no” from their little mouths.

One such little treasure of a child is a little girl I nannied at one point who is probably the most stubborn thing I’ve ever met.  If it’s not her idea, run for the hills because the screaming is ear piercing.  Her mother coddles her and in turn, reinforces her poor behavior by coming to her rescue when she’s upset instead of letting her work out her own feelings and giving her the words to do so.  I, on the other hand, have a zero whining and screaming policy, and will often leave her to scream out her feelings behind a closed door.

Last week I had the pleasure of watching the little thing and getting her ready to leave the house was exactly like pulling teeth.  She doesn’t do well with sudden changes, so I had told her the night before where we were going, what time we were leaving and what to expect.  The next morning, I gave her ample time with room to doddle, and constantly reminded her of our outing.  Normally, this works, however not this time.

First, she refused to get dressed.  When I convinced her to finally get dressed, she insisted on wearing clothes that were not hers, and thus entirely too large on her.  Once she decided that her own clothes would do, she then wanted to wear a dress.  This was fine, except she picked the one dress that required a shirt underneath it because it was a romper.  As you can imagine, she refused the shirt underneath it and the fourth tantrum erupted.  I talked up the other dresses she had, but nothing would work.  The screaming was horrific.

At this point, most people would just give in.  Me, I don’t give in.  I left her room, shutting the door behind me as she laid on the floor kicking and screaming.  It was quite a sight to behold.  This tantrum went on for at least 45 minutes, until suddenly the room went quiet and she poked her head out of her room to me waiting patiently in the hallway.

“Okay, I’m ready to wear the shirt,” she said as she sniffled.  For a split second I felt an air of accomplishment.  I had tamed the insufferable three year old.  Well, that accomplishment was very short lived, because she suddenly decided she wanted to wear a sweater as well.  The wanting wasn’t the problem, considering I had no problem with the sweater.  Though it was 80 degrees outside, I knew she’d take it off the moment we got in the car.  The real problem was that the sweater had a tie in the front, and someone had knotted it so tightly that I couldn’t untie it myself.  That meant the sweater wouldn’t go over her head, and thus she couldn’t wear it.  As you’d expect, another tantrum erupted.

This is where I realized I was not going to win.  If I had any chance of getting out of the house at all that day, bribing would be required.  Even though it went against everything I believed in, I pulled out a bag of candy and bribed like I had never bribed before.  No surprise, it worked.  The splotchy faced little thing was happily buckled in her car seat, lollipop in hand.  Peace had returned, for now.

Me – 0

Three Year Old – 1

In real life Tem Tem Teru has many little adventures of his own. We begin the day like many little kids, with a bath and a brushing of his teeth. Then it is time to practice his skills, he has a lot of tricks he performs…which will be showcased in one of the sequels which is going to be titled “The Magnificent Tem Tem Teru” but shhh that is to be announced at a later date! Then he gets to play most of the day before gardening, puppy class and finally dinner, cuddling time, another practice, and bed time. Four times a week we have two walks a day thrown in there and Two times a week there is either the puppy park or the doggie beach. 

As you can see Tem Tem Teru has quite the busy schedule! Share a little about your kids and their schedules! What are their favorite times of day? Activities to do? What do you enjoy doing with your kids?

“Um, ye-whoa cake and ye-whoa cupcakes and ye-whoa candles, and ye-whoa baboons.”

With these instructions in mind, I did what any one would do in this time of creative crisis; I searched Pinterest. And then I got excited because people have actually thrown yellow parties before and they were adorable! So I gathered all of these ideas together and made my own Pinterest Board: Noah’s 3rd Birthday Inspiration Board.

And then, I got SUPER excited because think of all the yellow food! Bananas, pineapple, cheese, Goldfish crackers, and lemonade. And then I got even MORE super excited because those are all perfect toddler foods! My son has come up with the BEST toddler themed birthday party ever!

So I made my Pinterest inspiration board and typed up a Word Document listing all needed party supplies, a guest list, food, and decorations. In May. (If you are trying to decide which part of that to make fun of; the part where I actually devoted a Word Document to my son’s party or the part where I did that in May, go ahead and know my family made fun of me for both.)

My son is so excited about this party. He has been telling people for months that he is having a “ye-whoa birthday party in Sep-ember.” And I have been planning the yellow birthday party in September since May.

For months, my son and I have slowly been gathering yellow things when we see them at the store, collecting them all carefully in the guest room closet. Throughout the summer I have slowly bought out most of the yellow things in the Richmond area. It’s like when you are pregnant and all of a sudden you notice all of the pregnant bellies and babies around you. But this time, I notice all things yellow.

I have also been preparing the house with diligent cleaning and yard work. Last week I re-organized the master closet, the linen closet, the guest bathroom closet, and thoroughly cleaned the entire house. I arranged for people to come and power wash the deck, re-mulch the back yard, and spray for mosquitoes this week before the big day, September 1st.

And then last Wednesday, after a particularly long day at home with the toddler, I went to the grocery store by myself when my husband got home. It was as much for my own sanity as it was for our need of milk.

While I was there, I decided to go ahead and order the cupcakes and balloons.

And that was it. Those were the last items on my list. After months of planning, all of the steps are done. Now, we just have to wait and have the party. Which means that my son is turning three.

The reality of that hit me as I began my drive home from the store, and found myself sobbing at a red light. My tears continued to fall as I wiped them away and drove the familiar route from the grocery store to my house. My baby is turning three.

September 1st is hard for me. It is the anniversary of one of the worst days of my life; a difficult birth experience I still have not mustered the courage or words to share.

But it is also the birthday of my son, the center of my world, my sweet boy that has changed my life in so many amazing ways. And this year, my baby will be three.

It’s amazing to see him now in all his three-ness, and at the same time see him at all of his life stages; his newborn helplessness, his baby coos, his beginning words, his toddling steps, his ever expanding world view.

Is this what being a parent is always like? Having the ability to see not only the person before you but also the child that they grew from? Knowing them not only for who they are now, but for who they were and for who they have always been? Having a love for them that is so intense it sometimes threatens to overpower you?

September 1st seems to sneak up on me every year with an overwhelming surge of mixed emotions. An anniversary of a hardship blended with the birthday of my greatest gift. And this year, the emotional pondering of my mixed blessings of motherhood are wrapped up in the intricate details of an extensively planned yellow birthday party.

We’ve pulled a few tips from Intellectual Development: Connecting Science and Practice in Early Childhood Settings to help you make the most of reading time with children.

Reading with Infants

• Provide cloth or vinyl books the infant can grasp and mouth.
• Choose books with simple illustrations of familiar objects.
• Sit with the infant in your lap.
• Use an expressive voice.
• Use books as part of a routine, such as before sleep.
• Label the objects, people, and actions in the book.
• Read nursery rhymes and poems. Infants are draw to their lilting rhythms.
• Stop when the infant loses interest.

Reading with Toddlers

• Provide sturdy board books that can be handled by the child.
• Sit with the toddler in your lap or sitting next to you. Reading individually or to only two or three toddlers at a time works best.
• Use books with simple text and illustrations or photos.
• Focus on talking about the pictures rather than reading the whole book from the beginning to end.
• Point to the pictures and describe what is happening.
• As the child to point out familiar objects.
• Point to pictures and ask the child to name things.
• Follow the child’s interest in the book, letting the child turn pages, go forward and back, open and close, and change books.
• Expect to read favorite books over and over. With a familiar book, you can begin to read a sentence and sometimes the child can finish it for you.
• Stop when the child loses interest.

Interactive Reading with Preschoolers

• Ask questions before and while reading the book about what the book might be about, what might happen next, how characters feel, or what they are doing and why.
• Pause for children to fill in the next word and to join in with repeated phrases.
• Provide actions children can do along with the story.
• Highlight or explain new words.
• Connect books to other classroom activities: read books about gardening when planting seeds (check out Early Sprouts and Hollyhocks and Honeybees for great classroom gardening curriculum ideas!), put out books about buildings or vehicles in the block area, or read a book about food before a cooking activity.
• Provide props so children can act out the story afterward.
• Read books to discuss new ideas and experiences or to explore difficult feelings.

For more tips like these and information on related topics, check out Intellectual Development: Connecting Science and Practice in Early Childhood Settings by Dave Riley, Mary Carns, Ann Ramminger, Joan Klinkner, and Colette Sisco.

Tell us: What is your favorite book to read with children?

So, we’re having a very pleasant run-of-the-mill Monday afternoon discussion, when there’s a lull in the conversation.  (Funny thing is that with three-year-olds, there is no such thing as uncomfortable silences because you as a parent now treasure the quiet moments.) August suddenly turns to me, smiles, and says, “I love you.”  It’s not the first time he’s said it, but it was the first completely unprovoked “I love you” I’ve ever heard from him.  I got a little choked up and said, “Oh wow.  That’s so sweet of you to say, August.  Thank you.  And I love you too.”  He giggles, and goes back to talking about the green Toyota Camry parked out front.

Another five minutes goes by while talking about the cars parked outside our window, and he turns to me again and says, “I’m going to give you a hug.”  Man, what is this, my lucky day, I guess.  I admit it occurs to me that maybe he’s being so affectionate because we’re starting preschool tomorrow, but I quickly dismiss that idea because I’m fairly sure that’s too complex of a thought process for a three-year-old.  Instead I respond with, “I would love a hug.”  He gives me a big hug coupled with a giggle.  I pull back and say, “What ever did I do to deserve all this attention today?”  No response.  Too many big words I suppose.  So instead of three-year-olding it down and rephrasing, I decide to just enjoy the moment and move on.

What a nice way to start the week.  Happy Monday everyone!

It’s amazing the differences between what we do for our children as compared, to say, our husband, friend, or boyfriend.  I’ve known Brent for well, let’s just say forever – more than half my life.  We dated, officially, for almost ten years before actually getting engaged, and we didn’t live with each other until we had been dating for about five years.  But here we are living with and loving August, and it’s only been three years today.  It’s nothing really.  I couldn’t even graduate college in that amount of time.

It’s hard not to love him though.  For example, this morning he asked to have a cupcake for breakfast.  Typically this would be a big fat “No”, but who am I to deny him that on his birthday?  He finished his cupcake while I sat across the table from him with my very nutritious bowl of Grape Nuts cereal.  After his last bite, he looked up at me and said,

“Don’t you want to celebrate with me?”

“Of course I do.  I am celebrating with you, and we will be celebrating all day.”

“But celebrating means to have cake with someone.” (Makes sense that he would think that)

“Sure, man, let’s split a cupcake.”

“OKAY!”

How can you not love a little boy who thinks that celebrating merely means to share cake?

Tem Tem Teru is never out of school however in his story school time is now in SESSION!

Here is a little preview image!

What is on the shopping lists for your schools and how excited are your kids to be going back?!

The new school year is just around the corner, which means many children will be making new friends, seeing old pals, and navigating the world of peer relationships. These early friendships are important for a number of reasons — they provide social stability, help children learn to get along with others, and support their early learning.

Try out these tips (from Social and Emotional Development: Connecting Science and Practice in Early Childhood Settings) as you encourage friendships and promote children’s long-term social and emotional development.

1. Challenge children

In one classroom, a sly teacher handed out three glue sticks to four children. She had more glue sticks in the box but didn’t let the children see them. She waited a moment for the children to realize the situation and then asked them what they could do. Sure enough, the children came up with a way to share. This teacher created a problem so the children could learn by solving it. Problems can be opportunities.

2. Establish routines that help children get to know each other

When children arrive in the morning, a simple welcome song that lists all the children’s names can help each one feel part of the group. You might sing “Let’s Welcome Friends” (to the tune of “The Farmer in the Dell”):

We’re happy Ben is here,

We’re happy Ben is here,

Let’s clap and smile and welcome him,

We’re happy Ben is here.

3. Encourage children to use the dramatic play area

You’ve seen children count on their fingers when they are still unable to count inside their heads. They do the same thing with perspective-taking. When they can’t take the perspective of others “inside their head,” they may use the dramatic play area to act out the role of others. The dramatic play corner is a learning center for social relations.

4. Let children experience mixed-age groups

In family child care settings and some center-based programs, children have the opportunity over time to be the youngest child, middle child, and oldest child. Younger children can learn from older ones, and older children grow from the responsibility of modeling and teaching. It is not necessary for children to be the same age to teach each other valuable lessons in taking turns, perspective-taking, and prosocial behavior.

5. Talk about perspectives

Connecting language with children’s actions and experiences is one of the keys to language development as well as to the development of skills such as perspective-taking. One of the easiest places to practice this skill is while reading to children (see tip #6!). You can also do this during ongoing social interactions in their classrooms: “Sara, this is Janie, and she is new here. She doesn’t know anybody yet. How do you think she feels? What would make her feel better?” and “Sam, you grabbed the paint that Eric was waiting to use. How does Eric feel now?”

6. Read to children

Choose stories that show children treating each other with respect and kindness. Read these stories individually and in small groups. When reading stories:

• Talk about the emotions shown by the characters.
• Ask the children how they think a character might be feeling.
• Ask the children what someone in the story could do to make a character feel better.

7. Encourage inclusive friendships

Help children with disabilities develop friendships by being actively involved. You can do this by:

• Commenting on friends’ play.
• Providing special materials or activities to encourage children to play together.
• Speaking or interpreting for a child so a friend could understand.
• Inviting two children to play together.

8. Use puppets and dolls to teach prosocial skills

Dolls, puppets, stuffed animals, and play figures are wonderful tools for demonstrating social skills with young children. You can use these props to enact a scenario that represents a frequent, troublesome behavior in the classroom or an issue that one or more children are experiencing in their lives. Puppets and dolls help the children see the situation from a new perspective. And because everyone is calm, they allow for problem-solving discussions.

Find more tips like these and information on related topics in Social and Emotional Development: Connecting Science and Practice in Early Childhood Settings by Dave Riley, Robert. R. San Juan, Joan Klinkner, and Ann Ramminger.

Tell us: What are your favorite techniques to promote peer relationships?

Tem Tem Teru needs to figure out which crayon he didn’t use…Can you circle the right one?

Run On: I always try to remember to let Hiram finish his thoughts. Usually, this means summoning up a little bit of patience as Hiram searches for the right word. Or at least, as Hiram searches for the best way to say something given the words he knows.

But this month, letting Hiram finish his thoughts has taken a new turn. Now, it sometimes means waiting for an amazingly long and complicated sentence to run its course. This is not verbatim, but here’s a general example: “I want to put on my shoes and tie them because I want to run and run but I need my shoes and I will find them and wear them and play, play, play because I need sandals but I want to do it myself and run, run, run to baby Eldyn and I will tell him to play and run and I will try to do it myself.”

Potty Training Take 2. We have officially made the switch to big boy underwear and this time, we aren’t looking back. The decision to try again was made after Hiram went almost a full two weeks at daycare without having a single accident. Of course, the added pressure that comes from wearing padded underwear with noisy rubber pants has resulted in a few minor setbacks. But I think it’s safe to say we’re on our way.

Oh Lympics: For the past week, we’ve relaxed the near-no TV rule to let Hiram watch a bit of the Olympics. He seems to be pretty into it (although he loves watching TV so much, it’s possible he’d watch C-SPAN too.) His only real beef is with synchronized diving. After watching quietly for a good 20 minutes, he looked at me and said, “Why they keep doing that over and over?”

Hiram: 2 Years + 2 Months

Hiram: 1 Year + 2 Months