Luego de que hace un par de días un sitio subió un mini video de Tila Tequila acariciando la reata de un wey equis, esta tipa amenazó con demandar y, por ridículo que suene,  lo decía en serio porque ahora resulta que los abogados de Tila ya se pusieron en contacto con la página de internet y le dieron 2 semanas para borrar el video, en caso contrario quieren que paguen 280 mil dólares por los daños que esto le causa a su clienta. Sí claro, porque la carrera (?) de Tila está basada en dar una imagen saludable y virginal y ver un video en el que ella se da sus buenos sentones ocasionaría que ya nadie la contratara. Uhmm…de hecho ya nadie la contrata, ja!

Y 280 mil dólares es demasiado dinero por una fulana que ya lo ha enseñado todo, creo que Tila debería conformarse con que le pagaran con un tubo de lubricante y una caja de simicondones.

Fuente

Tila Tequila o conocida científicamente como Thien Nguyen Thi Thanh… es una modelo estadounidense, animadora, payasa, bisexual, heterosexual, cantante y todo lo que decida ser al levantarse de la cama. Ya tiene su video pr0n.

La modelo, actriz y cantante Tila Nguyen, mejor conocida en el medio del espectáculo como Tila Tequila, pasó a convertirse en una celebridad más que cayó víctima en el 2009 de los escándalos sexuales, al ser lanzado en Internet un material inédito, en el que se le ve practicándole sexo oral a un hombre.

El video en cuestión cuenta con una duración de 10 segundos y presuntamente fue sustraído de la computadora que la modelo reportó como robada hace aproximadamente un par de años y el que fue calificado como uno de los videos más extremos que se encuentran en la red.

En el video se ve claramente como le esta aceitando la tubería a algún tipo para una mejor conexión de ensamblaje de maquinaria Alemana froten vergen en vaginen.

Si te desvelabas viendo la serie mediocre que ofrecía en MTV, en donde ese taponcillo se la pasaba intercambiando babas con todos los concursantes pues también te vas a desvelar buscando el video aquí, por que no es posible colocarlo dadas las reglas de WordPress.

Así que solo les puedo ofrecer un intento de Strip que hizo algún día, después del salto.

Every Wednesday, from today until the end of time, my close friend and bitter foe Mad Adam is going to stop by and attempt to clarify his delusions of grandeur, dominance, and defeatism. He’s very complex. And, as you’ll soon find out, most of what he has to say comes out of his ass, but man, is he angry! And I’m not talking the kind of angry that can be aptly expressed with all caps and exclamation marks, or even simple declarations of anger… you’ll have to use your imagination a little. Picture the bright red face. Picture the popping veins. Picture the holes in the wall, the shattered remotes, the hospitalized “friends”. Now, multiply it by 386. That gets you halfway there. But here, we’ll let him explain it…

Hello everyone.  Allow me to introduce myself.  My name is Mad Adam.  That’s right, not Mad Hatter (Les Miles), Mad Max (Mel Gibson) or Mad Men (those booze swilling cats at Sterling Cooper).  No, just Mad Adam.

Why Mad Adam?  First, I have an anger control problem. This is particularly true when it comes to my sports teams.  I get mad when they let me down.  I get mad when they get screwed over.  I sometimes get mad even when things are going well. What can I say….I’m Mad Adam.  As a bonus, my name is a palindrome.  Don’t know that is? Look it up loser.  And while you are at it, send some hate mail to your language teachers who obviously let you down.

Now that I have revealed that much of my anger is centered on my favorite teams, I better let you in on who those teams are.  Warning, I grew up as a military brat, so I never stayed in a place long enough to pick a team based on geography.  So, I have a pretty disparate set of favorite teams (with the exception of my college team which is clearly a result of the totally awesome education I received at the undergraduate and law schools of the institution listed below).  So, in no particular order, here are the teams that matter most to me: New York Jets (last Super Bowl….1969, the roots of my anger begin to surface); Los Angeles Dodgers; Los Angeles Lakers; Manchester City Citizens (EPL soccer you morons); and of course, my beloved OU Sooners.  Looking for a hockey team?  Go (ice) fish.  Not a fun game to watch on TV.

My proclivity for temper tantrums does not end with my favorite teams.  I also get mad about betting on sports (i.e. placing bad bets, not the act of betting on sports which I am very much in favor of), bad calls, terrible commentators, incomprehensible TV twists, bad uniforms, those who don’t appreciate good music, politics, stupid fans, silly traditions, inane rules….you get the idea.  I am Mad Adam.

The gracious, yet logic deficient Ed Honcho, has asked that I occasionally drop by this site and let all of you know what I am currently mad about.  I appreciate the forum and the opportunity to vent.  I would be remiss if I did not kick things off with a mailbag devoted to my legions of fans and their questions.  So, without further ado, away we go…..

Q: Did you see the Patriots throw a deep pass with only 30 seconds to go this past weekend when they were up 31 – 14 on the J-E-T-S, Jets, Jets, Jets? How did that make you feel? Cuz, I will tell you how it made me feel.  It made me feel like punching Tom Brady in his pretty face and defecating on Bill Belichik’s car.

- Francis Anastasio, Elizabeth, New Jersey

A: Francis, or can I call you Frank? No? OK. Francis, you could not be more right (except the part about shitting on his car, which is a tad bit weird). Not since Michael Bay decided to have “ghetto” robots in the newest Transformers movie have I seen such a brash and uncalled for decision.

What is he hoping to accomplish?  By kicking the Jets when they are down, does he hope to draw attention away from the most colossal coaching mistake in his career from the week prior against the Colts? By allowing a long pass to Randy Moss did he hope to show that Moss does in fact own Darrelle Revis? (if so, too bad, because Moss turned in a pedestrian 5 catches for 34 yards against my boy Revis).

Or is this just one more bully move by a guy that thinks he is God, but is in fact still the same a-hole that could not turn around the Browns and WHO WALKED OUT ON THE JETS IN 1999 A DAY AFTER TAKING THE HEAD COACHING JOB? What a loser. I HATE that guy. And, I really hate those spy-gate cheating, pretty boy Pats(ies).

Q: How are you feeling about the Lakers so far?

- Bonita Benson, Culver City, California

A: In a word….AWESOME.  So far, Khlomar has not been a distraction.  The return of Gasol has transformed the team.  Ron Artest is playing within the system and has not punched Nicholson in the face on his way down the court yet. And Kobe? Well, he is busy doing work.

Since the Lakers’ Western Conference coronation is all but assured, let’s turn to the more important issue.  Will those turd burgers from Boston make an appearance and get the whupping they deserved two years ago? As of this writing they are 10-4, and look pretty good (for a team in puke green adorned with a picture of a leprechaun sporting a vest, hat and bow-tie covered in freaking shamrocks).  I don’t want another beat-down on Orlando.  I want Ray Allen, Paul Pierce and “look at me I am yelling a lot, I must be really intense” Kevin Garnett to face the music like they did in 1985 and 1987 when Magic and crew beat Bird and his brigade of losers (like Kevin “the Armpits” McHale and Robert “Reefer” Parrish). SCREW THE CELTICS!

Q: When are you going to talk about the Sooners? Texas Tech destroyed Stoops and company and the crowd turned the House of Pain “Jump Around” into an anti-Sooner anthem.  And, don’t forget Capel’s b-ball team that got rocked by the VCU Rams, his former team.  Seriously, did you jump off a cliff this weekend?

- Rusty Jackson, Texhoma, Texas

A: I am typing out this response from the rather large ravine that I did indeed toss myself into after the collective DUMP THAT OU TOOK ON ME THIS WEEKEND.  This is the kind of showing that makes you want to give up sports.

That raises the issue.  Is it possible to really give up on your favorite team?  I say no.  The first time I ever tried to do it was when I was 8 years old and the Dodgers were on a serious losing streak. I declared that I was no longer a fan of Dodger blue and tried to become a Cincinnati Reds fan.  However, each morning when I would look through the box scores in the local paper I found my gaze straying from the Reds to find out what the Dodgers had done the night before. The reason?  If you are a true fan, you can NEVER give up on your team.  Even when they TEAR OUT YOUR HEART, LIKE OU DID TO ME THIS WEEKEND.

Did I kinda avoid answering your questions Rusty? You bet. Stay tuned, though, because if those goat loving, tobacco chewing troglodytes from Stillwater win Bedlam this weekend, then I may have to dedicate an entire column to how FREAKING BAD THIS OU FOOTBALL SEASON HAS REALLY BEEN.

Q: So, how about Les Miles and his clock management skills?

- Earl Papadeaux, Natchez, Louisiana

A: Oh, how I detest Les Miles.  What an overrated, egotistical, arrogant insipid little man crowned with an ill-fitting hat. How many times must he do something like this before Tiger Nation rises up and says enough is enough.  The LSU school newspaper, “The Daily Reveille” is calling for the firing of offensive coordinator Gary Crowton over this debacle.

First, “The Daily Reveille,” really? I had to look up “reveille” to even know what the students there are referencing.  It is a bugle call associated with the military.  So, the newspaper is a daily bugle call.   Whatever.

Second, firing the offensive coordinator is completely missing the point.  Did anyone see Les Miles’ patented “deer in headlights” look as the precious seconds ticked away in the game against Ole Miss? He was befuddled, bamboozled and flummoxed all at the same time. This man could not coach his way out of a paper bag when decisions that are tougher than what to eat after the game are on the line.  Speaking of food…

Q: Don’t you think that Mark Mangino is just mean, mean, mean!

- Dolores Bitterbottom, Mulberry, Kansas

A: Look, I have had my share of crude talking insensitive coaches.  Heck, it is really part of the job description as far as I can tell.  Reminds me of a funny story.  Ed Honcho and I used to have a baseball coach that referred to him as “Colonel Sanders” because he was too “chicken” to get down on the ball when fielding grounders in practice.  That was funny. What Mangino (allegedly) has been doing?  Not cool.

When a college student confides in a coach about his alcoholic father, that should remain between him and the coach. Same thing with a player that tells coach about his brother getting shot in the neighborhood he grew up in .  To use that information against the players is the sign of a man that has lost touch with reality.  He is not breaking players down and then building them up.  He is just breaking them.

While we are on the subject, I am wondering if any Jayhawk ever gave it back to the coach? In case they have not, and current Jayhawks are looking for some ideas, here is my humble proposal for a dialogue with Mangino:

Mangino – “Hey, stop loafing WR!  You keep that up and you will wind up on welfare and turning tricks in an alley for crack cocaine like that story about your mom you shared with me in a closed door meeting the other day.”

WR – “Hey Coach.  Here’s a thought.  Maybe you should drop your daily caloric intake by, I don’t know, maybe 40,000 calories.  Seriously, do you really need that entire rack of ribs to go with your 22 ounce steak, double cheese-burger and fried okra covered in brown gravy?  I’m just looking out for you.  Well, I am also looking out for the players that keep getting hit by one of your 17 chins when you move suddenly on the sideline.”

Q: How about Jimmy Clausen getting cold-cocked by an angry Irish fan at local bar?

- Gaye Barr, Elkhart, Indiana

A: This had to be the first time anything associated with the Irish was on target this whole season.  My only question is why not track down and punch Charlie Weis?  The guy is pushing 3 bills and his knees are shot.  There is no way he could get away quickly enough to avoid a total pummeling. (please note that Mad Adam, while prone to fits of anger, does not condone nor promote violence against athletes and/or coaches….you know, unless they really deserve it).

Q: As an unabashed fan of front-running, big money teams like the Lakers and Sooners, is it any surprise that you’ve recently declared yourself a Manchester City fan? And even though you’ll do your best to spin the answer, it’s mostly rhetorical, as the indisputable answer is “no.”

- Ed Honcho, Sunbathing on the French Riviera

A: Nice try Ed.  You are clearly trying to bait me into a fit of rage.  However, unlike Tila Tequila, I am not that easy.  You see, what you are failing to tell our readers is that it is “undisputable” that I became a fan of the Blues prior to September 2008 when Man City was purchased by the Abu Dhabi United Group, making it the wealthiest club in the world.

Which means that I became a fan of Man City, a team that has not won silverware since 1976, before this fortuitous twist transformed them into the Champions League chasing team they are today.  So, SUCK IT ED.  Seriously.

Q: Is it true that you’ve been in the same fantasy football league for almost 20 years and never won?

- Bjorn Bjornssen, Hammerfest, Norway

A: Bjorn, now I am starting to get pissed.  Your “source” is mistaken.  Allow me to provide you a history lesson. Yes, I have been in the same fantasy football league since 1988.  In fact, Ed Honcho, myself and friends may have indeed invented fantasy football.

No, it is NOT true that I have failed to ever be crowned champion.  My team has a long and storied history.  I consistently make the playoffs, and I have been in not one, not two, but THREE championship games.  Several years ago Ed Honcho and I squared off in the championship game.  The game ended in a tie according to an on-line fantasy sports site that will not be named.  Incredibly, after nearly two decades of fantasy sports our collective group had never devised a tie-breaker scenario.  So, we declared a tie and the championship was split between Mad Adam and Ed Honcho.

Now things get interesting.  Approximately 6 months later, one of our friends and fellow fantasy owner, we will call him “ass-wipe,” decided to peruse the web-site because he had nothing better to do.  He was surprised to see that the CRAPPY, STUPID AND PROFESSIONALLY NEGLIGENT web-site that shall not be named had changed the score for Jeff Garcia (my starting QB at the time) by one measly STUPID point.  Ass-wipe decides to share this information with the league.  The result? Years of bickering and a COMPLETELY FALSE AND WHOLLY UNSUBSTANTIATED CLAIM of an undisputed and sole championship by Ed.

Many of you may ask, and rightly so, how in the world can you change the score of a fantasy sports championship MONTHS after the fact?  Isn’t that like tuning in for the Super Bowl and watching the Pats lose to the Giants, only to find out the following summer that the NFL had changed its mind and declared that the David Tyree “helmet catch” was an incompletion and the Pats actually won?  Good point.  And Bjorn, you no fantasy knowledge having dude from Hammerfest, did you stop to ask what would have happened if we applied the tie-breaking rules we have today?  No? Well, let me tell you what would have happened. I WOULD HAVE WON.  And, what would have happened if we played the next week (since we tabulated the points just to see)?….wait for it….that’s right….. I WOULD HAVE WON.

Dammit.  Now my blood pressure is though the roof.  Bjorn, I am sure you can see from the foregoing synopsis that in fact I DID WIN A FREAKING CHAMPIONSHIP.  And, if you don’t agree with me then you CAN JUST ENJOY YOUR CITY WHICH REEKS OF REINDEER MANURE.  That’s right, I said it.

Q: Why so angry? Childhood trauma? Life stacked against you? What?

- Adolfo Ocampo, Ushuaia, Argentina

A: As I am sure you can see from the questions posed by some ingrates above, as well as the other stupid topics that got me riled up, there are plenty of reasons I am angry.  SO, STICK YOUR POP PSYCHOLOGY UP YOUR ASS ADOLFO.  I will be sure to call if I ever need your attention.  Don’t hold your breath in the meantime.

Thank you loyal readers.  Until next time, keep watching sports and DON’T PISS ME OFF!!!

Dude Bites Off another Dude’s Ears Over A Facebook Fight ! (Barstool Sports)
Kim Kardashian Lookin’ Really HOT in a Bikini (Yeeeah)
PETA Freaks Want UGA to use a Robotic UGA (Sports by Brooks)
Jessica Simpson Attacks Perez Hilton! (TPC)
Isla Fisher is Mostly Nude (Celebslam)
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Hottie Gymnast Nastia Liukin Hits L.A. (BLS)
The Drunkest Chicago Bears Fan of 2009 (FOTP)
Hilarious Photo Outakes From “The Hangover” (Bro Bible)
Yawn. A Tila Tequila Sex Tape (Celebslam)
10 Videos of the Sexiest Spansih Models in the World (Uncoached)

Oh, how I gave a smug chuckle when I saw this video. Tila Tequila, you are so silly. Hahaha. Always good for a laugh. Such a vast smorgasboard of vocabulary she possesses. I’m starting to hate the word “like” after watching this.

Am I judging her? Yes. Not because she is attention-seeking, annoying and thinks she’s the most awesome, sexiest thing to walk the earth, though those factors may play a small part. The main reason though, is because she is just…. plain….. stoopid.

And her fans are lame as well. Mostly teenage boys who write comments like, “stop fckin talkin n take off yr top yo”. Morons.

Oh, and your fans are kids? That’s pretty sick. Especially because if you’ve had the unfortunate experience of watching any of her music videos, she’s prancing around with total fetish underwear on. Sick Tequila, ewwww.

And of COURSE she pretends she loves her frigging fans. Without them she would have a completely different life. She owes her damn career to these monkeys. So she needs to act as if she cares about them. jeezo.

Efron, Zac — The star of the currently-in-theaters Me and Orson Welles recalled his first audition recently, saying he was quickly interrupted and dismissed, which made him cry. He even still remembers the role: Hannah Montana.

Link: Zac Efron’s Worst Audition Made Him Cry (Socialite Life)

Giving, Thanks — Stay tuned this holiday weekend for special Thanksgiving essays from the entire staff of The Brown Tweed Society. And be thankful none of us are at your family’s Thanksgiving dinner. 

Kardashian, Khloe — Kardashian and new husband Lamar Odom recently purchased a posh, $4 million dollar home. Sources say it’s a perfect fit for Kardashian as it is built completely of candy deep in the German woods and outfitted with a giant oven.

Link: Newlyweds Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom Purchase $4 Million Home (People)

Lambert, Adam — ABC’s Good Morning America has canceled a scheduled concert by devil-music gyrator Adam Lambert after a steamy performance at the American Music Awards left old people stunned and young people confused. Good Morning America hasn’t shied away from controversy this vocally since it refused to allow Tom Bergeron to show off his collection of “pooping donkey” candy dispensers in 1999.

Link: Adam Lambert Concert, Planned for Good Morning America, Is Canceled (New York Times)

Suleman, Nadya — “Octomom” revealed during a recent interview that she’s planning to write a book. The book will allegedly revolve around the confusion of having so many children and the socio-economic difficulties faced by living life inside a shoe. 

Link: Octomom Talks Having More Children & Writing a Book (Examiner)

Sullenberger, Chesley – US Airways pilot Chesley “Sully” Sullenberger, recently interviewed for the upcoming NBC’s People of the Year television special, told Matt Lauer that his handling of the Hudson River crash-landing got him “rock star sex.” Although, if we’re being honest, Chesley Sullenberger’s interpretation of “rock star sex” is an early dinner at Boston Market, some cuddling during NCIS and a little slow dancing to The Very Best of Johnny Mathis. Go get ‘em, tiger.

Link: Sully: Hero Role Got Me “Rock Star Sex” (CBS)

Tequila, Tila — The renowned television actress is threatening legal action against a website which recently publicized a sex tape of Tequila that she claims was stolen from her laptop over two years ago. Tequila decried the theft as “an invasion of privacy — I mean, just because it was on my laptop, and labeled TilaHasSex.mpg and left on the counter of the men’s room the New York City Port Authority with the file open doesn’t mean it should be trotted out for everyone to see. Please make me famous again, everyone. Please.”

Link: Tequila Threatens Lawsuit Over Stolen Sex Tape (TMZ)

Singapore born singer/model Tila Tequila has threatened to take legal action over leaked sex tape footage she alleges was stolen from her laptop.

Tequila, 28, who is featured in an explicit video with an unidentified man on pornography website 4Tube.com, claims the adult film was obtained illegally, as the footage was stored in a computer she reported stolen in 2007.

According to TMZ.com, she is threatening to sue the website’s bosses if they fail to take down the video and her lawyer, Cyrus Nownejad, has already begun proceedings.

“A police report has been filed for Tila’s stolen laptop computer which contained that specific clip,” the Daily Star quoted Nownejad as saying.

“I am currently in the process of sending a cease and desist letter and a notice of intent to sue if (the footage) is not removed,” he added.

After her previous scandal of appearing ranting naked in a video online, Mizz Scorpio Tequila is faced with another scandal–the THEFT of her laptop,which had a porn clip of her in it!  The clip surfaced on porn site 4tube.

Tila’s camp is filing a lawsuit against the site.

More @ TMZ

TWEET THIS “Tila’s New Sex Tape Scandal!”

Tila Tequila’s Twitter (265,700+ followers)

REAL
Her dress is 100% natural fiber

(Tila Tequila)

I’ve seen worse

Picture by: dunno source Caption by: ail via Poster Builder

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Since I have never gone a month without at least one entry in Xpinionated, I bring to you the Top 5 Famous Rich Folks Who Don’t Deserve Their Fame.

5) Jared from Subway. His diet and weight reduction plan was based on a Subway diet. Are we to believe it was due substantially to his diet and an insignificant amount of weight loss was due to exercise? And if that’s the case, why aren’t the The Biggest Loser episodes just a bunch of challenges to get to Subway, kinda like The Biggest Loser meets The Amazing Race…The Biggest Amazing Loser Race. Yeah, Jared shouldn’t be rich and shouldn’t be famous for doing what he should have been doing in the first place.

4) Flavor Flav. Quite possibly the most unattractive human being on TV. Scratch that, outside of Nene from The Real Housewives of Atlanta, the most unattractive human being on TV. And close to the least talented. He was a hype man, not a rapper. Standing next to a rapper does not make one a rapper just as standing next to me does not make you funny. Out of nowhere, the part of Public Enemy that had no talent has returned to the limelight, searched for love from apparently blind and deaf women (that’s the only way I can imagine they wanted Flav), and even starred (used very loosely) in his own bad (used very tightly) sitcom. Seriously, his fame hangs on the balance of an oversized clock gimmick…..

3) Kardashians. Ok, Kim is fine. Not have-her-own-show fine but fine nonetheless. The other Kardashian girls? Notoriety from what exactly?

2)Tila Tequila. Maybe I have the story wrong. I don’t care enough to look it up and plus it wouldn’t change her position on this list or my feelings about her one iota. But let’s take a shot at this: girl opens myspace account, girl puts up progressively sexier pictures of herself on myspace, girl develops a myspace following due to pubescent nature of myspace clientele, MTV gives girl show based on myspace popularity. Meanwhile, there’s some poor kid studying his butt off at a community college in between his two part time jobs that MTV, and the rest of the country could care less about…..

1) Lauren from the Hills/The Real OC. It is no coincidence that MTV plays a huge role in the top two personas on this list. Lauren’s is a slightly different story. Rich kid living it up in Orange County. No particular talent. Just a willingness to let MTV cameras follow her around while she finds 1,231 ways to put the word ‘like’ into a sentence unnecessarily while working her way through MTV created drama. Woe is her life as her and her friends hop into the Escalade for another trip to the specialty Boutiques…..Her reward for being a rich kid with no real worries: a spin off show with the same high school drama…just without the high school..

P.S. Lauren excepts top honors in this list on behalf of the entire cast of the Real OC and the Hills.

Where I Got Swine Flu From Jager...

Hey all. If it wasn’t brought to your attention, I have been on a blogging hiatus because I’m studying for my LSAT on December 6th. I guess God was smiting me because I contracted Swine Flu. My friends say it’s because I’m a pig. I say it’s because I had sex with your mother. BOOSH! Some say this is karma. Me? Well, I totally agree. Even though dystonia-girl was just looking for attention and is a big fat faker[edit:Not a faker, her symptoms were mostly mental] who turned out to have a speedy recovery. Well lah-dee-dah, your highness. Do cheerleaders just get everything? Grrr.

Well, as we all know swine flu is very serious and I’ve put a lot of thought into it. So here is my last will and testament:

I never was a rich man, basically because I have a slew of terrible habits. What little money I do have though, will go to who ever tracks down Maddox (the self proclaimed famous blogger) and kick him right in his self-serving balls. This guy is funny, sure, but his act is kind of tired and his book sucked. Know what else? He didn’t respond to my email. And I’m not just some kid whining he didn’t meet Maddox. Nope. He called out Swine Flu on his blog, and I was going to sneeze in his face and spit in his ginger ale as he requested.

To Berstreet: I’ve shaved my head and bagged the hair. Now you have costume material for years to come. You’re welcome.

To Tom Coughlin: I leave you my 16 inch retractable knight-stick. After knowing you did not go home and beat your son-in-law or your own blood who married him, I’m sending this for every Giants fan. Either you start laying down the law or I’ll fucking haunt the Meadowlands. Don’t mess with me. I’ll have NOTHING better to do. Hell, you can even use this to hit your wife. I don’t care. Just get mean again. Or I’ll have Deacon from King of Queens check your prostate with the GD thing.

To My Parents: Since I’ve prearranged my passing, I’ve deleted all the pornography from my lap top so you can strip it dry of all my writing and give it to a publisher. I’m sure they’ll either make advances on sociopath studies or at least a decent dick-joke sitcom.

To my Dog Rudy (pictured below):

Don't Laugh. He has a disorder.

Rudy, you’ve been a loyal companion for the 3 short years you’ve been alive with me. I know I’m checking out early and that’s usually the dog’s job but for your remaining years, I leave you…my femur. I decided I’m not going to be an organ donor because of the sole fact that I hate those purple bumper stickers with the pun about “Heaven knows we need them here!,” but I decided I can go to heaven missing a leg so a cute puppy can play for years with the strongest bone in the human body. Well, the 2nd strongest bone in MY body but I need the other one for Marilyn Monroe.

*high fives my attorney named Chaz*

To Brian Westbrook: You ruined my chance at playoffs in fantasy football this year for my money league and I think that’s why my body started shutting down. The fact I had Reggie Bush for 4 weeks and he didn’t crack 7 points and then he pops off for 21 while your career could be over just infuriated me. Just like when I dropped Rashard Mendenhall after the week he was benched and I did it thinking no one could grab him before the game. Well, my opponent did and he had 36 points against me. Ugh. Enough about my fantasy miscues, I feel like Ruxin with Gates from The League. Well, Brian. I leave you my frontal lobe. I’m sure you forgot math by now with all your concussions. Actually, scratch the organ donor idea. You can take all of my body parts when you need them if you just promise to drink some fucking milk once in a while and stop being made out of crackers and loose-leaf paper.

To Gally: I had to put a lot of thought into this one. I left you my toilet paper. Basically because you’re an asshole. ZING!

To LeBron James: I left you my tooth paste for you, because it’s very obvious you put your stupid foot in your stupid millionaire mouth when you said you’d be great at football. It was the next game that you sat out an entire half for banging your wrist on the rim while dunking. Now, I’m just a fan and an amateur blogger but I’m about your age so I can talk down to you…DON’T YOU THINK FOOTBALL IS A LITTLE ROUGHER THAN BASKETBALL? Douche.

To Ashton Kutcher: You get nothing. I’m just letting you know me and Patrick Swayze are going to run a fucking TRAIN on Demi Moore. That bitch must suck the blood of the innocent because she gets hotter as time goes on. Real talk.

To Levi Johnston: I’m leaving you my old bike helmet. Why? Because I’m going to be dropping a lot of pianos on your head. You suck something fierce my friend. You aren’t even funny or attractive yet you get Playgirl spreads? You’re the new K-Fed. Congrats. Taco Bell is awaiting your arrival. Scumbag.

To Business Socks from Style Points: I’m going to leave you my autographed Mickey Mantle rookie card that he signed for me as a kid. I’m also going to send you an autographed picture of myself. You might not know it, but you were the first sports blogger to pay attention to me

To Big Troph: I’m going to leave my sense of humor. God knows you guys need one over there.

To Gimp, I’m going to leave you my set of balls because you haven’t done anything man-worthy in a long time. I’m also leaving your name on Megan’s Law.com for all those 9 year olds doing mediocre things posts.

To Tila Tequila, I left you a muzzle and a dildo. If you don’t put on the muzzle just go fuck yourself. Man, last time I used that joke I had to give my dinosaur a bath. Man, could I be on any more fire?!?

It isn’t commonly known to a lot of people that I have OCD. Like Howard Hughes, I saved all my urine. I also didn’t do many drugs. So I am leaving all my pee bottles to the following: Tim Lincecum, Shawne Merriman, Michael Phelps, Dwayne Bowe, Sean Sherk, Alex Rodriguez, Manny Ramirez, Lattimer from The Program, my uncle Ray, former President Bush and fetish porn directors.

And lastly, my girlfriend. I’ve decided that you’re coming with me. Can’t have you cheating on me when I’m in hell heaven. So I’ve left you cyanide in the tea the lawyer just offered you. You’ll be dead before you can cry. See you soon honey!

The Tila Tequila naked Ustream rant is quite peculiar. Out of nowhere, Tila Tequila got naked on Ustream and proceeded to make a rant. Although it’s known that the former “Shot at Love” starlet is going through a lot right

Click above to read more…Thanks

Dear Tila Tequila,

So aside from the shit talking that your doing about your ex boo Shawne Merriman, WHY THE FUCK ARE YOUR TITTIES OUT???. I understand that you need the publicity cause people could give 15 fucks about you but really??? Im going to need you to get some class. On top of that YOU FELL!!!! If you ask me you might as well be a damn stripper and just call it a day if not a call girl cause you are acting a damn fool, and I’m not even going to go in on the topic of you masturbating on cam and showing your pussy [which could use a shave] cause that was a mess.

Love,

NayBesa

Some people are famous because they have extraordinary talent. Some make movies and television shows we love; others sing like angels; some are incredibly athletic and inspiring; and others make significant political changes in this world we simply can’t ignore. Then there’s Tila Tequila.

Why is Tila Tequila famous exactly? Your guess is as good as ours. She achieved her “fame” first by posing for Playboy and building an internet following after she became their Cyber Girl of the Week. That was followed by more magazine spreads, and then eventually reality TV. We guess talent being a requirement for fame is not strictly enforced these days.

More recently, Tila has been in the news (well…the gossip “news”) for a physical altercation she had with her boyfriend (San Diego Chargers linebacker Shawne Merriman) in September where he allegedly choked and restrained her. She released pictures shortly after of her bruised arms as proof. Merriman was arrested for the offense but was not charged by the district attorney due to insufficient evidence. Just yesterday Tila went on a bizarre Ustream rant where she complained about everything from her abusive ex-boyfriend to her personal hygiene – naked. Yep she was naked in the video while discussing all of these worthwhile things the world really needed to know.

Not surprisingly, Tila has spoken out today to defend her inappropriate display on Ustream. She states that she’s been having anxiety and flashbacks of the violent incident with Merriman and that caused her to flip out. On video. Naked. Makes tons of sense right? But fine, whatever, we really didn’t want to waste our time writing about this girl until Perez Hilton reported she said the following:

“They didn’t even look into [my case]. When my case first came out, everyone was calling me a liar because [they said] if he really did beat you, you wouldn’t have said anything because Rihanna never said anything [at first],” said Tila. “But I am not her. No offense to Rihanna, but because of what she did, it sends out a message to everyone … ‘When you get beat or abused, keep your mouth shut.’ So I decided I am going to come out and speak about it and fight for it…What Rihanna did … her message was to say quiet and that’s not OK.”

Wow seriously Tila? Seriously? Rihanna is the one sending out the wrong message to everyone? Not you and your naked late night antics, skanky clothes, dirty hair and your proclaimed “bisexuality” even though you clearly only date men? That message is fine, but not Rihanna’s initial silence over her beating? We would think that a woman like Tila, who has allegedly been abused by her boyfriend, would understand all too well Rihanna’s reasoning for remaining quiet about the issue at first. Even if she didn’t necessarily agree with it, we would imagine Tila would relate to at least some of the feelings that may have caused Rihanna to not come out and talk about her abuse right away. Things like embarrassment, fear, oh and you know – not wanting to share a humiliating experience with the whole world? Then again, that’s probably a gross overestimation on our parts. We apologize Tila for giving you so much credit. Welcome to our prestigious list of Girls We Hate!

Tila Tequila is backsliding, being the protagonist of a new XXX movie. This time, it’s not about a lost/stolen tape, it’s a premeditated manifesto of the MTV star.

Wanting to take revenge on her former boyfriend, Shawne Merriman, Tila taped herself in inflammatory hypothesis, undressing, dancing and, at one point even masturbating. Tila wanted to send a message to her ex-partner, for the beatings imposed a while ago.

Bi-sexual tv star Tila Tequila is now regretting, the star stripped down naked, ranting to her fans about how mad her ex boyfriend made her feel, calling him a ‘woman beater’ She kept her fans intrested by doing all sorts of crazy ass stuff. Tila’s ‘webcam show ‘ included a striptease, waving a gun around, removing a tampon and masturbating in front of the camera. Ok so the rest sounds pretty hot yeah but removing a tampon, was that really necessary?!

“People call me an attention whore … or whatever,”  “But excuse me, I’m a grown ass woman and I’m confident in myself … I think a woman’s body is a beautiful thing … that’s why I’m a lesbian … I was born naked … anybody who is against that is gay and in denial.” she ranted to her fans. Her lawyer did say that the law suit against ex boyfriend could well have pushed her over the edge and said he will be getting his client some help. Boy it sounds like she needs it, because yes she is hot but doing all this crazy stuff dont make her hot.

Lmaoooooooooooo!!!! I’m upset someone didn’t tell me about this nonsense sooner. I actually don’t care but boy is this funny! Tila Tequila, throat chop! You can’t even put on a fake striptease and not fail. Smh!

Follow me: twitter.com/throatchopu

Jag läste någonting för ett tag sedan om att det hade läckt ut en inspelning med Tila Tequila där hon är full/hög och pratar om sitt ex, tamponger och hur nice det är att slicka hennes vagina. Och juste, hon är naken hela videon igenom. Jag kollade inte upp videon förrän nu eftersom jag redan hade gott om asiatisk porr har haft mycket att göra, men ikväll såg jag filmen och den är hur rolig som helst. Hon berättar Väldigt ingående om hur trevligt det är att ge och ta oralsex och illustrerar det för att hon är omtänksam och tänker på de hörselskadade som kanske tar del av hennes videos. Jag försökte hitta videon på en hemsida som är proper eftersom jag inte vill länka till en sida där huvudreklamen är piller för att öka ens ejakulation med upp till 500 % (!!!), men det var inte så lätt. Och klockan är efter midnatt, jag vill sova. Om du gillar asiatiska dvärgar med plasttuttar tillräckligt mycket för att ignorera reklam med eregerade penisar, så se videon här.

Así es, por increíble que parezca, a pesar de que Tila Tequila bien podría ser presidenta del club de la decencia, resulta que ya salió a la luz un fragmento de un video en el que ella se echa un palenque con algun tipo equis. Supuestamente, Tila está muy molesta porque asegura que ese video estaba en una laptop que le robaron y que jamás pretendía que se diera a conocer al público. Digamos todos juntos: ay por favor!. Ahora Tila está amenazando con demandar al sitio que publicó la escena.

O sea, ¿esta tipa cree que somos tan ingenuos como para no darnos cuenta que seguramente fue ella misma la que filtró el video? porque ya hace rato que pasaron sus 15 minutos de fama, y obviamente para volver a ser relevante tenía que dejarse grabar en su hábitat natural, o sea, de rodillas haciéndole un wawis a un desconocido. En fin, para los que se prenden con porno de duendes pueden hacer click aquí para ver el cachito de video que sacaron. Son sólo unos cuantos segundos, así que no se emocionen mucho.

Fuente