Flying in 3 weeks time with my girls to spend Christmas with my parents and brother on the Gold Coast.

I’ve never flown on my own with both girls. Generally one or the other will meltdown during a flight, usually I have another adult with me so it is easy to deal with… well easy for inflight meltdown.

I’m pondering making up some little business cards explaining my kids are on the spectrum and asking for patience and understanding….. and some packets of disposable earplugs. Then if a meltdown does occur I can just hand the card and earplugs over to anyone sitting near us.

Not sure how to word the card, I don’t want to give too much info but want to give enough so the people understand. I wouldn’t hand them out unless meltdowns were in progress, I don’t think random strangers need to know about my kids being on the spectrum unless it is impacting on them.

See meltdowns are a bad time to be talking to the girls, Heidi in particular needs me to be quiet and just provide her with the right sensory input, darkness, silence, squishes, whatever. Annie usually has to cry herself out without physical contact until she has calmed enough for hugs and logical discussion.

I remember reading somewhere about traveling with kids who are melting down inflight, one suggestion was that you will get more sympathy from fellow travelers if you appear to be trying to calm your child. It doesn’t matter if what you are doing is effective or not – and frankly how is a stranger going to know – so long as you look like you are trying to fix the problem. That makes sense and if it diverts antagonism away from my girls I’m happy to play that game.

But I’m also thinking of ways I can educate fellow travelers and make them feel more at ease. Particularly those in the seats close to us.

Which reminds me I had a brilliant idea of getting sleeping mask for Heidi’s eyes something that could block out all visual sensory input.

Should I be asking the Qantas people for assistance? Word up the flight crew before hand?

I think we can all agree that there’s nothing like a Road Trip. Yep, nothing like it. Thank fuck. 

Especially when everyone in the car has started screaming – none more than you, the driver – before you even get to the end of your street. And then you still have two hours’ drive ahead of you with one child cheerfully announcing how many minutes are in each successive hour while another child complains about stomach cramps, and all you can think is “ Go Vomit On The Mountain” while still trying to show enthusiasm for the fact 16 hours equals 960 minutes. 

Still, as I’ve said before, getting there is half the fun. Which means that the other half of the fun is at your destination, right? 

Well, in this case, the destination – a beautiful holiday house my friends had rented – didn’t disappoint.

For one thing, there was a creek. My friend led us there on a pre-lunch walk with visions of us all gingerly dipping our toes in the water and maybe skimming stones along its glassy surface. But she didn’t factor in the instant effect any body of water has on my children – be it the size of the Pacific Ocean or a small puddle of unidentified liquid on the kitchen floor. Before we could say “sneaky little hobbitses”, Mr Justice had stripped off and was scrabbling around on the sharp rocks on all fours like Gollum with the others in close pursuit. And my friend also didn’t factor in the effect that my children’s water activities would have on my voice, making it all loud and very very shouty. Oh, happy days. 

But I always knew that bedtime was going to be the biggest challenge, for this was an overnight visit, you see. As night-time approached, I became a kind of Oracle and, in a somewhat trance-like state (i.e. slightly drunk), I predicted the following: “The youngest two children will run up and down the stairs until I grow angry and put the child-gate at the top. Then they will stand at the gate and shout. Maybe cry. Or do that shouting-cry that I love so very very much. And that will go on for a very long time indeed, maybe hours. After which, I will have to go up there and physically restrain them in their beds until they finally submit and accept Sleep as their Master.”

Which is pretty much what happened, although I skipped the child-gate/shouting-cry stage just to spare us all from permanent damage to our eardrums.

Anyway, I went on to spend the night flitting between beds: Tiddles McGee is a high-maintenance sleeper at the best of times and The Pixie got all restless and started running a fever. And then I remembered her stomach cramps complaint and began to worry she was going to vomit and tried to work out a Vomit Action Plan which identified the best vomit receptacle in the room, which items of furniture to avoid at all costs and whether I had brought enough change of clothes in the event of “splashage” (or worse). And then I started to worry about driving home the next day alone with vomiting kids (because already, I’d assumed that of course they’d all come down with it) and how I’d manage it after having no sleep. And then I started worrying that all this worrying about not getting any sleep was actually preventing me from getting any sleep and slowly, but surely, my mind got more knotted up than Tiddles McGee’s baby hair, all with a mosquito flying in and out of my ear and an angle-parking Tiddles McGee kicking me in the kidneys.

And after hours of this worry (or so it seemed), I somehow managed to remember that worrying about something before it happened was futile and how I should just roll with the punches and go with the flow (even if that flow ended up being a Type 3 Vomit). It was like so much of parenting – if I let myself be paralyzed by all the things that possibly could go wrong, then I’d never leave the house. Like ever. 

And after that illuminating thought, sleep finally came – albeit punctuated by the occasional kick to the kidneys. And the vomit that I was so worried about never arrived. And the morning brought us a happy breakfast with friends ’round a large sunny table and then other adventures too, including an incident involving the purchase of sugar-coated jam donuts on the drive home. But that, my friends, is a story for another day.

Let me begin by saying that our family much prefers traveling 24 hours by plane to traveling 2 hours by car.  Don’t try and make me feel bad about that, like if I just knew all the secret tricks our kids would magically become great car companions.  It’s just the way it is.  We are not a happy car driving family.  Yet.

Plane traveling, though, is great.  Mostly.

Let’s start with the general philosophy – only take what the two of you parents can carry and still hold a hand at the same time.  Without a cart.  With an umbrella stroller.

This philosophy is now encouraged by having to pay for every piece of check in luggage.  LAME-O.

So we packed for our three month stay in one suitcase and one duffel bag.  Someday I’m going to get this bag, and then see how efficient we can be.

Now, for the good stuff.  The carry ons.

Carry on philosophy – only take what the adults can carry on their backs, leaving arms free for pushing umbrella strollers and carrying tired children through airports.  Not to mention dealing with tickets and passports.

First, we do not take car seats on the plane.  Other people swear by them.  Getting them down the aisle and locked into place while shepherding small bashful people makes us swear.  (But, when we did still think it was a good idea, Janeen had the great suggestion of strapping it to a luggage cart and using it as a stroller in the airport.  Brilliant.)

Other than the struggle of transporting the carseats, we found that the girls didn’t want to stay in them, so we ended up with kids on our laps and no elbow room.  Because you can’t keep kids strapped in for 10 hours on a plane.

So in the two bags that are carried on our backs (no over the shoulder bags!), our packing generally goes as such.  Devo carries the tickets/passports, computer(s), and camera(s).  I carry everything else (which is remarkably lighter than the technology).

Diapers (one for every 2 hours in transit, plus a few extra), wipes, vaseline, and compact extra clothes for the kids (two sets for the baby).  This all goes in one packing cube.

One baggie with liquids, including infants tylenol for just in case.

One small bag with tylenol for the parents, vitamin c, my beloved thyroid medication, and toothbrush.

Sweaters.  But only for the little girls.  I can keep a blanket on myself and an infant when sleeping.

For food we take trail mix or nuts.  And non-spill sippy cups.  The non-spill part is very important.  Non-spill means that liquid does not come out unless someone is sucking on it (and no caps to open and close!).  We have the flight attendants put the drink of choice in the sippy cup and it greatly reduces parental gasping and lunging.  This bonus by far outweighs the inconvenience of lugging empty cups around.

And about toys.  Now that the girls are older, we are packing them each a very small bag with toys in it.  I think there were five identical toys in each.  Paper and pen, very small doll…and I don’t even remember the rest because the only toy that got any attention in 24 hours of traveling were the dolls.  Which is saying something, because usually my kids don’t play with any of the toys we bring.

I take a one-pocket bag that can fit alot, but collapses when it’s empty.  The girl’s bags fit in the top of my bag.  As they get older, they will carry their own bags.  But for this trip, it was infinitely simpler to tuck them into my bag for getting in and out and around places.

This trip we also took the snugli.  Which I referred to mid-trip by various names such as the thingy, the backpack, the sling.  And then wondered why Devo never knew what I was talking about.  We didn’t really use the snugli.  I thought it would be a good idea for holding the baby secure while sleeping, but we couldn’t get comfortable.  And I hate wearing it because it makes my shoulders really hurt.  So I don’t think we’ll take it again.  But I still think it’s a good idea.

The last thing we take it the aforementioned umbrella stroller.  Yes, so you can’t pile things on it (including other children).  But it’s compact, it’s easy to get in and out of, the tiredest child gets to use it, and you don’t get really upset if it gets all beat up.

So there you have it!

I’d like to announce that we arrived for our (almost) three month sabbatical with – three children, three carseats, two suitcases, two carryons, and a partridge in a pear tree.

Here we are in Japan after 20 hours of traveling, one poopy (executed, of course, right when we began taxiing towards the runway – so we had to sit, and sit, and sit, in it), one bowl of ramen, one visit with my cousin-in-law in the Portland airport, one purchase of non-spill sippy cups, four lame movies, and a partridge in a pear tree.

So now we’re here.  Blessedly.  And already our horizons are expanding under the influence of the wide open possibilities of a sabbatical.  A Sabbath.

New Sweden Creamery Historic Marker

Originally uploaded by minnemom

Located on west side of MN Hwy 111, just south of junction with MN Hwy 22.

Our vacation to Oahu was planned for months. We were able to get two of our tickets using frequent flyer miles and the third using American Express miles. Although we’re not frequent fliers, we beef up our accounts using the United Dining program www.united.com/dining which gives us up to 10 miles per dollar spent at participating restaurants. We also do a lot of grocery shopping at Vons which gives United miles on top of the Amex double membership rewards miles.

With the airfare for myself, my husband and Miss B, our six year old paid, we pricelined a rental car for $23 a day and the only expense we had remaining were the hotels and our food and activity expenses while there. Hubby is the Navy Reserves and took advantage of two places that are open only to military families and guests. He got us a room at the Hale Koa www.halekoa.com on Waikiki for the first two nights for $110 (no tax) and a 2 bedroom cabin on the old Bellows Air Force Base  http://www.bellowsafs.com/index.html which is right on the beach in Waimanalo for $80 a night (including internet and no additional taxes). All sounds great, right?  Then I found out my company was being acquired and there was a very real possibility I might lose my job in the next two months. Oh, and the same week we found out that hub was going to be deployed.

I had a little breakdown.

But considering we’d be out the airfare and rental car expenses, we decided to go through with the vacation even though we were very stressed about what financial hell may await us. I did some research on cheap places to park our car at LAX and found a great little place called Sunrise LAX Parking http://www.sunriselaxparking.com/cms/ that even included a free car wash (they did a great job) for $59.99 a week. Sooo much less expensive than those other places and very convenient and prompt in pick-ups.

Hub is always on my case about my over packed bags. Each airport visit includes a very frustrated reminder that I can’t pack my bags so heavy. After checking the United website to see if it now costs to check bags (it does), I went as far as to weigh them and for the first time in my life, I came in under 50 pounds. Woohoo! To reduce the costs to check our bags we maximized our carry-on allotment and pre-paid online to check our bags. This saved us $5 to $10 a bag. At this point I was so stressed that I was seeing $ signs flash before my eyes at every little expense.

So we get into Honolulu about 7 PM and go right to the hotel. I’m not very impressed by Waikiki. It kind of looks like Long Beach, but the water is warmer and prettier. We went right to the snack bar, Barefoot Bar and the beach. My stressed little brain was ready to start my vacation and a Mai Tai and a swim was just the way.

The Hale Koa is very reasonably priced, but their bar is just as expensive as anywhere else. The snack bar is fairly reasonable with breakfast, basic grill items, sandwiches and salads for about $5 at the most expensive.  There was a happy hour at one of their interior bar/restaurants, The Warrior Lounge that had $1 shrimp cocktail. We got right on that.

I’m not snobby about rooms. I really don’t need very much. I like to have a comfy bed, but if it’s not comfy I usually go to a Navy Exchange, Costco or Walmart and get a twin-sized memory foam mattress pad for $9.99 and use it for the duration of the trip. If we’re on a road trip I just bring one with us. The bed at the Hale Koa was very comfortable but the rooms were quite small which can make it difficult when traveling with children. That’s not a huge deal for me as when we’re on vacation we’re out of the room the majority of the time. I have no desire to spend my vacation inside. I only want to come in the room to sleep, but when in the room, I want to sleep. I don’t like noisy rooms. The Hale Koa had a misfire of their fire alarm multiple times starting in the wee hours of the morning the first night we were there. We made the climb down the stairs the first time, but ignored the repeats. All in all the Hale Koa was great, but Waikiki, not so much. That being said, the Hale Koa is on the nicest, most quiet and least commercial part of Waikiki Beach. It’s right next to the Hilton Hawaiian Village.

Our first full day we got up and took advantage of the free breakfast at the activities presentation. We went to the onsite Navy Exchange and picked up snacks, a beach mat, water, a boogie board for our six year old and some Mai Tai mix. We spent the entire day at the beach and our daughter fell in love with boogie boarding. The board was no more than $10 at the exchange and lasted the entire trip even though it was a cheapie. We even took it home as it was just her size.  Hub rented a board and surfed and I started to finally relax into vacation mode.  We visited Ono Hawaiian Food http://www.yelp.com/biz/ono-hawaiian-foods-honolulu which so many recommended and it is very authentic, but being that I don’t really eat meat, it wasn’t quite for me. We also checked out Waiola Bakery & Shave Ice http://www.yelp.com/biz/waiola-bakery-and-shave-ice-ii-honoluluand it was delicious. Definitely set off our “best of” shave ice contest for the rest of the trip.

We had a great day to decompress before we started our journey to our next destination – Bellows Beach in Waimanalo which is on an old air force station that looks nothing like an air force station. We stopped at the exchange and commissary at Pearl Harbor to stock up on food and beverages for the cabin. You can’t beat exchange and commissary prices. I was in full-on vacation mode and didn’t quite realize that we were going to a mall so I did get a few looks in my very sheer tunic and bikini. Oh well, maybe I could have been more discrete, but it is Hawaii and I was a tourist.

Bellows is an incredibly gorgeous stretch of white sand beach and turquoise water that is open to the public on the weekend, but closed except to military families during the week. They have campsites for free and these great 2 bedroom cabins, some of which are directly on the beach. They are rustic, but I don’t really care about that. They have a refrigerator/freezer, stove/oven, microwave, picnic table and bbq out front, television, internet access and onsite activities such as miniature golf, lei-making and hula lessons.

We threw everything down and ran to the beach and it was then that we saw them. Man o’ Wars.

There were literally hundreds of them every few feet on the beach and who knows how many in the water. We saw a child who had just got been stung with tentacles across his face, a girl who had a huge welt across her arm. The lifeguard told us that since the tide came up she’d had an endless procession of swimmers who had been stung. And we’re not talking mosquitoes, man o’war are no joke and the welts they left were significant. Apparently there had been a hurricane offshore the week before and it had washed them all onshore. Since we were on the windward side of the island, we got hit. So we ixnayed going in the water, watched where we stepped on the beach and made a Plan B.

Hub, the surfer, was probably quite thrilled about this as we made plans to set off for a day trip to the North Shore early the next morning. I’d heard so much about the North Shore being the center of surfing and stories about these incredible beaches and huge waves. I expected it to be fairly gentrified and I was so pleasantly surprised. I think our first stop was the Turtle Bay Resort, the only resort on that side of the island. We’d heard the snorkeling was great and we took advantage of the public access. I think we lasted 15 minutes and were back in the car. We just weren’t impressed on any level.

We continued driving up the North Shore and our next stop was Sunset Beach. What more can I say besides HEAVEN?  The shore break was amazingly perfect for our daughter to boogie board and she did for hours, letting the soft waves push her up on the sand and pull her out.*  She literally fell in love with boogie boarding here and hub was so happy and proud to see his little girl love a hobby that he really likes. He was so excited to tell everyone about his daughter boogie boarding at Sunset Beach.

After a few hours we started getting hungry and driving towards Haleiwa, the town in the North Shore. Hub is also an avid skateboarder and had heard about someone who owned a Mexican restaurant in town who also had an empty pool in his backyard for skateboarding. We set off looking for Cholo’s. http://cholosmexican.com

I’m a huge fan of Mexican folk art and Cholo’s has a great collection. I wanted practically everything on the walls. Food and drink were good, but average priced. No discounts here. Nevertheless, we had a great lunch and the host was super nice. We felt really at home.

After lunch we headed to what everyone says is a North Shore must – Matsumoto Shave Ice. http://www.matsumotoshaveice.com/

It was hot, the shave ice was good, but not sure it was really worth the long line outside. It didn’t stand above the rest in a significant way. A few days later we tried the Aoki Shave Ice place next door and were just as happy if not more as we didn’t wait in a humungous line.

We headed back to the beach, this time to Pipeline. Pipeline is one of the only beaches I found that was good for finding some shells, but it’s not safe for kids to swim. It did however have waves and hub headed right back to Haleiwa to rent a board.

He surfed and we played for a few hours and we started driving back, looking for a place to eat dinner along the way. We stopped at Ted’s Bakery which is known for their chocolate haupia pie.

It was here I had my first experience with a shrimp plate and I was hooked.

I usually don’t finish everything on my plate, but let me tell you, I ate every single bite. For under $20 we got 2 huge entrees that included the usual 2 scoop rice, macaroni salad and chocolate pie. All three of us easily ate off those two entrees. The shrimp plates are the most buttery, garlicky shrimp scampi you could ever imagine. Mmmmmm. I was so full.

Now we knew exactly what we liked and where we’d go next so the next day, after going for a run on Bellows Beach and finding it still Man O’ War infested, we headed right back to the North Shore as we did every day afterwards. We spent most of our days at Sunset Beach and Pipeline and absolutely loved how family-oriented and pro-kid everyplace seemed to be. I was really struck that almost every business had signs in the window about free or reduced cost Head Start programs for kids.

No visit to the North Shore is complete without a visit to a Shrimp Truck which basically looks like a roach coach, but contraire mon frère, they are delish. During our visit we sampled several. In Haleiwa we stopped at Blue Water Shrimp and the shrimp were huge and delicious. Depending on how many shrimp, plates and shrimp trucks range from $6-$13 but easily serve as both lunch and dinner as you won’t be hungry again. I completely gorged myself. We really liked this truck and highly recommend it.

We also tried the original shrimp truck, Giovanni’s. http://www.yelp.com/biz/giovannis-shrimp-truck-kahuku. Very good, very garlicky, very buttery but very messy as shells are still completely on.

There’s a great smoothie place right next to the Giovanni’s truck that we really, really loved. We had to go back for seconds.

Miss B was very interested in snorkeling, but it’s a struggle to teach a six year old how to snorkel. After much complaining about how the mask and tube felt, we decided to focus on finding a kid-friendly place to teach her to snorkel. We found a cove that I’m pretty sure is called Pupukea and has a reputation for having lots of turtles. This couldn’t have been more true. Within minutes of arriving a giant turtle crawled up to rest on the sand for about an hour. There is a large turtle protection presence that ropes off the turtle so it can’t be harassed. We continued to work with our daughter on her snorkeling skills and she started to get the idea of it. While she and hub swam out a little bit, I stayed about 20 feet from shore where a turtle swam up and barely inches from me, ate some growth off a rock for at least 15 minutes, and kept bumping into me with it’s flippers. They really are amazingly cute animals.

Nevertheless, she still wasn’t completely sold on snorkeling so we decided to try the not so aptly named, Shark’s Cove which is also on the North Shore.

At Shark’s Cove there are fabulous tide pools where you can literally just watch the fish without putting your face in. Beware that you really do need reef shoes to safely walk around in the water. When hub was helping her snorkel he slipped and got a nasty reef cut. Miss B was jazzed as she could see that amazing things were under the water. When she finally got her face in the water and saw a fish she was off. All she talked about was what kind of fish she saw and how much she loved snorkeling. We finished the day at Haleiwa Joe’s, a restaurant in Haleiwa which was our splurge of the trip.

It was a bit of a tourist trap and not worth it. I love a nice restaurant, but the food just didn’t justify the price. We should have gone to a Shrimp Truck.

That night when we returned to Bellows I bought her one of those laminated reef fish guides for about $3 and it was the best gift ever. We didn’t buy her any other souvenirs the entire trip. All she wanted to do is point out the fish she saw and draw pictures of them.

Because she was so jazzed on snorkeling we decided to follow the guidebooks advice on the supposed best place to snorkel on the island, Hanauma Bay.

Hanauma Bay is a marine preserve set in a sheltered cove. They do their best to care for it, charge admission and educate visitors on how to protect the reef, but it’s pretty thrashed. We found more fish and better visibility at Shark’s Cove.  We found Hanauma Bay to be a waste of money. Hanauma Bay admission is $7.50 per person plus parking and $2 per person to ride the shuttle down to the bay rather than walk. We walked. Walking back up the hill carrying snorkel gear was a bit of a drag, but we were on a budget. Like many other places on Oahu, Hanauma Bay does offer a military discount

Since we were driving on the south east part of the island, we decided to take advantage of some of the other sites. We had read about a place called Sandy Beach with breakneck shore break that was a mecca for brave body boarders. The beach was beautiful and the shore break was in fact a killer. I couldn’t imagine going out there. When we first got there the lifeguard was on his megaphone warning people “If you have children and you want to swim, you are at the wrong beach. This is not a beach for swimming or for children.” I can’t blame them as I wouldn’t want to rescue anyone in that shore break either. We stayed and watched for a while and were amazed at how many truly stupid people with visibly minimal ocean experience tried to go in the water. Within seconds they’d be knocked down by the waves that then pulled them in with their power.

On the way back to Bellows we stopped at another Shrimp Truck, this one advertising Sweet Corn as well. This truck was so delicious, probably our favorite and definitely Miss B’s favorite as she devoured not only her corn (which was in fact very sweet) but hub’s and my corn as well.

Of course we stopped for Shave Ice as well. This little place called Keneke’s had a patio with tons of graffiti but all of it was bible verses. The Shave Ice was pretty good and we were excited to get back to Bellows.

When we returned to Bellows it seemed like there weren’t quite as many Man O’War and Miss B was eager to boogie board. She said she didn’t care if she got stung. We put on her rash guard, hoping it would protect at least part of her body and in the water she went. This was the only day that we truly spent at the beach at Bellows, but if it hadn’t been for the jellyfish invasion, we probably would have seldom left. As Miss B boogie boarded, we took tons of pictures and were overwhelmed by just how beautiful this beach is.

For our last night on Oahu, we headed back to the Hale Koa. We figured that for Miss B’s first trip to Hawaii, we had to go to a luau. I did a great deal of research on luaus as they are ridiculously expensive. One thing I knew is that I had no desire to get on a bus and drive an hour or more to a luau, not be able to leave when we wanted, and have an hour or more drive back. We researched Germaine’s, Paradise Cove and The Polynesian Cultural Center. The cost ranged from $60 to $80 for each adult. The conclusion we came to is that if you want a pretty beach location, go to Paradise Cove. If you want an amazing and authentic show and don’t mind your luau without a mai tai or any alcoholic beverage, go to the Polynesian Cultural Center.

Because we didn’t want to drive, didn’t need our luau on the beach and wanted our mai tais, we went with the Hale Koa luau. The cost was $49.50 for adults and $29.50 for children. It is open to non-military guests. We were beyond pleasantly surprised. We loved this show. The performers were talented and friendly and quite funny. It was down to earth and comfortable and so easy to get to. All we had to do was go downstairs and into the luau garden. As an extra bonus there was a total crush-worthy male dancer who I took a liking to and a female one for hub. Sweet! Now we could both stare and drool and neither of us could get jealous.

The show was great. Miss B got to hula and now wants to take lessons. The food was not so hot, but I think that the bottom line is that I just don’t like authentic Hawaiian food. In other words, maybe the food was great, but just not my taste. We loved doing the luau on our last night on the island. It was the perfect send off. The next morning we woke early and spent a few hours swimming before we had to head to the airport.

Our total hotel bill for 8 nights on Oahu was just over $700. We spent about $600 on food and other activities and were able to come home and face the uncertainty of my employment without feeling like we broke the bank. I would definitely go back, but I would skip Waikiki and instead rent a house on the North Shore with friends. I was absolutely blown away by what an amazing job North Shore residents have done at “keeping the country, country.” With no resorts, it truly is an island paradise, welcoming to kids and easy to do on a budget.

*Please note that this trip was taken in August. In winter months the North Shore has incredibly strong surf and many places are not safe for swimming. Summer is a night and day difference in terms of beach safety and conditions.

Family Travels on a Budget just returned from a lovely weekend in Rancho Mirage/Palm Springs.  Priceline  www.priceline.com had a great $75 per night deal at the Westin Mission Hills  Westin Mission Hillshttp://specialoffers.starwoodhotels.com/westinmissionhills/so.htm?PS=PS_aa_SoCal_Google_westin_mission_hills_082806_NAD_FM

I selected a 4 star property anywhere in the Palm Springs area and we were off. The Palm Springs area is starting to become my Vegas alternative. It’s so much easier and less expensive. However, beware that many hotels there have been charging resort fees of about $20 or so a day lately. You may want to look into it before you bid. The Westin had a resort fee of $20 per day that we did not know about until check-in. It included parking and internet.

I’ve been loving Priceline and Hotwire ever since I found www.betterbidding.com and was able to access their lists of participating hotels based on location and star rating. I knew that wherever we ended up, I would not be disappointed.

We arrived by 11 AM on Friday and the hotel graciously allowed us to check into our room early. The room itself was huge. We had plenty of room for the three of us including a dining area inside and on the patio outside. The couch pulled out for our 6 year old and she loved it and we slept on the signature Westin Heavenly Bed. I thought I remembered a feather bed on these but I guess I was wrong. Bathroom was 2 separate rooms which was great for privacy. Products were lovely. The service at the Westin is amazing. A friend had gifted me a massage as it was my birthday weekend and I received a call immediately on check-in that informed me of this. So I promptly made my massage appointment for the next day and we headed right for the pool.

Although we were arriving to the pool rather late, lounge chairs with umbrellas were easy to find. And considering that it was 110 degrees, this was important.

I’d read several reviews of the Westin Mission Hills and some mentioned that there weren’t enough umbrellas and that the cement and railings by the pool were too hot. All weekend we never had a problem finding a shaded area by the pool no matter what time we went out. And regarding the hot cement and railings, that’s insane. It’s the desert and it’s 110 degrees, use some common sense and wear your flip-flops to the pool’s edge. The heat falls under the act of god clause and not the hotel’s responsibility so it’s up to you to keep your child and yourself safe from the heat. I also read several reviews that there was no security at the pool and many locals would take over. Security was heavy during our visit and you had to give your name and room number for entry. Some complained security was too stringent and searched coolers. I brought a big bag with beverages and snacks in it and was fine. They never searched. I think it’s all about how flamboyant you are with sneaking stuff into the pool area. Just be discrete and be friendly. They are doing their job after all so don’t be flagrant by wheeling in a cooler as they will get in trouble for not ignoring you.

The highlight of the pool was the water slide and our daughter went on it multiple times. We visited both the resort and the villa pool. The villa pool water slide was much bigger and that pool is more family-oriented due to the fact that it is the pool for the timeshares. You can bring a cooler etc. in here, but not at the resort. It was a bit weird that several parents let their young children run around completely unsupervised. One boy who was about 10 was in the Jacuzzi with us and informed us that his Mom, Dad and Nanny were all still asleep. Crazy.

Although we brought small snacks and water etc. in my bag to the pool we did eat lunch via their Poolside service one day. It was the usual grossly overpriced poolside service. $8 for a hotdog and fries. I had a $16 cobb salad and the turkey was a bit scary. I was very disappointed in my salad. We only ordered two drinks at the pool, a Don Julio margarita and a Mai Tai. Both were heavily watered down and not very good. We vowed to not eat at the pool again for both financial and quality reasons. The hotel provided a refrigerator in the room so we were able to keep beverages and leftovers etc. in there and walk back to the room for lunch and eat out on the table on the patio.

If I had one complaint about the facilities it’s that the outside lights don’t come on until quite late so we were fumbling to our room in the dark. Conversely, I have to rave about the deep tissue massage I had with Joyce. She did a great job and very intuitively worked out some kinks for me.

Our first night there we drove into town looking for a place we wanted to eat. There are many chains and high-end restaurants, but when we saw the sign for “Big Momma’s Soul Food” we knew we were in.

http://www.yelp.com/biz/big-mamas-soul-food-restaurant-cathedral-city

For $35 we fed 3 people plus had enough leftovers for lunch the next day. Our 6 year old went gaga over the Catfish and baked beans. Hub had the BBQ Chicken, mac & cheese and greens. I gorged on the Veggie plate with greens, sweet potatoes, mac & cheese and potato salad. For dessert we all shared a huge Sweet Potato Cobbler which hub salivated over.

Saturday night we went into downtown Palm Springs for dinner and went to a Mexican restaurant called Maracas.

http://www.yelp.com/biz/maracas-restaurant-palm-springs.

I don’t understand some of the negative reviews as it was really, really good. While this was more expensive, I think we paid $50 for the 3 of us with tip and my husband and I each had a really yummy margarita.  Oh my goodness were they delicious.  We picked up a Palm Springs Visitors Guide at the hostess counter and got 10% off with the coupon inside. Sweet! My Salmon in tequila sauce with spinach and chipotle mashed potatoes was super yummy. We sat outside on the patio and people watched. Downtown Palm Springs is so much fun. I think the next time we go up we’ll stay closer. Maybe we’ll go back to the Riviera http://www.psriviera.com/that we stayed at this spring and got a great rate for on Hotwire.

While at the Westin we did do something we never thought we’d do. We got hit up a few times to do the timeshare presentation and declined initially. But after speaking with a woman at the pool who called herself and her husband “timeshare whores” we decided to check it out. She described staying at so many fabulous places free just by listening to the presentations and being firm when they decline the offer.

The Westin time share presentation offered us a $100 Amex gift card but that was actually a room credit. They also provided childcare for our daughter during the hottest part of the day so it was a relief for her to get out of the sun. The presentation was an hour and a half and was pretty interesting in terms of how timeshares work. If it wasn’t for the ridiculous maintenance fees inherent in timeshares, our ears may have been perked. The $100 paid for our food and resort fees so we had nothing additional to pay upon check out.

Whenever we drive through Cabazon on the 10, we always stop at our favorite taco stand,Crazy Coyote Tacos. http://www.yelp.com/biz/crazy-coyote-tacos-banning

It’s just off the 10 near the outlets exit and it borders the Indian reservation. It’s a small shack with picnic tables and fake dinosaurs but has the most amazing tacos. We always go for the giant chicken tacos. Sooo delicious and spicy. The tortillas are so thick that they seem like fry-bread tacos. Mmmmm.

We’re always on the lookout for cheap, kid-friendly vacations to the Palm Springs area. We’ll definitely stay closer to downtown next time so we can enjoy more of it. Next time we’d love to try the tram. Anyone have tips for tram discounts?

Stay tuned for posts from Oahu, Tucson and Vegas…

It’s a dreaded and familiar situation for air travelers: The toddler seated nearby screams ear-drum busting, brain-piercing outbursts for most of the flight. Worse, the kid behind kicks the back of your seat, drumming your spine at irregular intervals, causing you to plead quietly, and ironically, for the “comfort” of an undisturbed airplane seat. It’s impossible to concentrate on that project you’d planned to work on during the flight or enjoy your book. Gone is any slim chance of napping en route.

Embarrassed and frustrated parents console, cajole and order better behavior, but an emotional two-year old does not readily respond to reason. Annoyed and irritated passengers complain to companions, flight attendants and parents, usually to no avail. Changing seats is the best option, but packed flights often makes that impossible. The best you can do is try to be patient and bear it, knowing the future of humanity is on board. And, not all kids are bad travelers. You just hope and pray that the kid near you is well-behaved. Either way, you’re prepared with ear plugs and noise-canceling headphones.

With a screaming child on an airplane, everyone suffers

But this dreaded scenario raises some important questions. What are the rights of parents to travel with young children? What are the rights of other passengers to basic comfort, including acoustic comfort while in a confined space? What is the most ethical way to resolve the conflicts that arise on airplanes, where both parties are held captive until the flight ends? Should airplanes create quiet zones?

Frequent flier before kindergarten

The US Travel Association, a group that tracks travel trends, reports that there is a growing trend for parents to travel with children. According to the Domestic Travel Market Report (2004):

One in four household trips in the U.S. (26%) include children under 18, or 170.1 million trips in total in 2003. Most (91%) trips with children are for leisure, nearly half of which are taken to visit friends or relatives.

If you think you’re seeing an increasing number of strollers being checked at the gate and more babies and toddlers on board, it’s not your imagination. The data show that young children under the age of 5 are traveling more with their parents. A generation ago this was almost an unheard of practice. But now home towns are farther away than ever before and babies are booming. It should come as no surprise then that the most efficient way to connect families and friends with children is via airplane. Places like Hawaii are magnets for families because of the warm ocean and safe, enjoyable environment.

No children to check

However, growth in travel is not limited to families. The number of people traveling without children is growing, too. In 2006, there were about 2 billion passengers trips in the US (Domestic Travel Market Report), about 75% of whom were single adults and groups of two or three adults. Business travelers have cut back, but their ranks are still swelling albeit not as fast as leisure travelers. In other words, there are more people, not just children, traveling by air in the US than ever before.

More affluent or experienced travelers might opt to upgrade to first class as one way to ensure greater comfort. This is certainly a great option, especially if you’re one of the lucky few with the highest elite status and score those upgrades for free. But the lower tier elites, especially on the busy business routes like New York to Dallas or Chicago to LA, less frequently land an upgrade. But even an upgrade with a better seat, a nice hot meal, more attentive service and a guaranteed power outlet doesn’t insulate first class travelers from screaming children. Because there are more parents traveling with young children, there are also now more children than ever before flying first class.

For example, I flew from Miami to Boston this week. I was lucky enough to score an upgrade (thanks to my travel companion’s higher ranking elite status). I settled in and looked forward to getting some writing done on my laptop. But as we taxied for take-off, screaming started two rows ahead of me. It was the kind of maternal reflex-triggering scream from an 18-month old that women have evolved to respond to: child screams, female checks in. The problem was that it wasn’t my child, and there are serious social taboos against checking on other people’s children in public. The screaming lasted for three hours, nearly the entire flight. When we landed, I drug myself exhausted from the plane. No work. No sleep. Nothing but an evolutionary reflex firing constantly that I couldn’t ignore or satisfy.

Airlines suck, but there’s a way to suck less

Airlines haven’t responded to the needs of the changing pool of passengers very well, apart from charging more for less. Hanging on the edge of bankruptcy, most are just trying to survive. The marketing subtext is that air travelers should be grateful that we still have domestic choices, even if they’re all crappy. Annual ratings of airlines done by J.D. Powers show that customers are increasingly dissatisfied with all US airlines, even though a few win awards. In an award survey someone has to win, but it doesn’t mean that people really like any of the choices. It’s a matter of which one is less awful.

One option for airlines to improve customer satisfaction is to create quiet zones, like those found on trains. An age minimum might be one of the requirements, along with a commitment to not chatter away to your neighbor. This may seem adult-centric, but in fact it could lower the stress, frustration and anxiety suffered by parents of the screaming kid who won’t quiet down. In other words, a quiet zone could make an airplane journey more comfortable for all passengers.

Here’s how it might work. Take a typical aircraft like the Boeing 757 with a 3-3 coach configuration and dedicate the first six rows (18 seats) as the quiet zone. Remove two rows (about 12 seats), one behind first class and the other after the last quiet zone row. Install thicker walls in place of the rows to reduce sound (sound proofing would be better, but not possible under TSA rules). Considering that it will cost the struggling airlines to remove seats, the price of the quiet zone seat would rise 10%-20% to cover the loss. For example, a $350 airfare from New York to Los Angeles would cost about $420 in the quiet zone. Throw in a free sandwich to make it more appealing.

Traveling with children on a vacation can be one of the most educational and memorable family activities you will ever undertake. Or it can drive you nuts ! A home exchange can help eliminate some of challenges faced by parents and make your next travel holiday with children a special traveling experience. A home exchange is a practical and affordable family vacation idea.

Parents and their children value the privacy, extra space, comfort and convenience of swapping homes for vacations.

Home exchange attracts many families with children. Families often arrange to swap with others with similar aged children. Children of all ages enjoy having a whole new set of toys, books, computer games and videos to occupy them while their parents relax in the comfort of a home. If you’re traveling with small children, you might consider the convenience of not having to pack cribs, strollers, playpens and car seats.

If you have children, let them be in contact with your home exchange partner’s children, if possible. It helps ease their concerns about someone else staying in “their room,” and they may even become friends. In fact, many families report developing long-lasting friendships with their swap partners.

To make a long story short, traveling with a baby is  not for the weak ones! Florida is  a hot burning oven at the moment, so we decided to spend a few months close to New York, where my husband’s business is. My man drove our SUV down, packed with  clothes, portable crib, two strollers, high chair and a baby puree maker, because Mr. Baby wouldn’t pick up anything healthy from his tray:  food must be shoved down his throat, while he is flipping pages of baby books and promptly throwing those books to the floor a few minutes later.

Baby and I flew a few days later.  Mr. Baby is quite an accomplished traveler, having been on a ski trip to Colorado and on a hiking vacation to North Carolina. He slept on both of these flights and woke up only at destination.  So, this is what I had assumed he would do again. I was wrong.

Welcome to Orlando International Airport and here’s me with a car seat, a special device that wheels the car seat around, making it into a stroller that Mr. Baby refuses to sit in, a gigantic diaper bag full of toys he doesn’t want to play with, a  small cooler with homemade purees (banana-almond butter is our favorite,) and an Ergo baby carrier ( love it, by the way!) Mr. Baby is sitting in Ergo and sucking on my boob,  while I am passing through security,  removing my shoes and my belt. He would not let go of the boob. Yum-yum.

Then my sweaty self, logging the bag and the car seat thing behind me is trying to get a sandwich.  Good luck. Baby’s got a poop. It makes him  unhappy. After changing him, I make a second go for the sandwich.  No luck again. Now he is hungry. I sit him in the car seat thing and open  puree jar #1.

“Kaka,” he says and refuses to open his mouth. Puree jar #2 has the same fate. I use a plastic knife to cut open an avocado -his favorite.

“Kakakada,” he says, pleased. I shove half of avocado in his mouth. “Kakakada, mama,” he says.

I follow up with quite and impressive pile of oatmeal. It’s time for another poop. He says: “Kaka.” I clean up the kaka, dragging the car seat, the bag and the baby into the bathroom. It’s time to board the plane.

The baby is in Ergo and the car seat is on top of my head:  it’s the only way to drag it down the narrow airplane aisle. I hit a grandma on the temple, but keep going, because at that moment I don’t care. Mr Baby smiles. We get to our seats and I am finally able to stick the car seat onto Mr. Baby’s seat. I buckle him in, hand him his friend Jora the Giraffe and think that the nightmare is over. He will soon pass out.

I am sitting next to an older gentleman, who gives Mr. Baby a disapproving look right away. I get an even worse look, especially after Mr. Baby gets bored and starts whining. I give  my son some Cheerios and they end up all over the seats.  Some of the Cheerios fall on the older gentleman’s perfectly cut gray hair. The plane takes off.

Mr. Baby doesn’t appear to think about sleeping. He is wired  and whines  loudly. I unbuckle him and he stands up in his seat, leaning over the seat in front of him to see what’s there. There is a woman with long hair. He gently pulls on it. .. The woman turns and smiles. The smile appears strained.  It’s easy to see that she is ready to smack both me and Mr. Baby. Mr. Baby gets down to the floor and stands up again. He finds plane safety instructions and starts to tear them. Then he stands up again and starts flirting with the couple, seating behind us. Then he wants some boob. Then he eats some more Cheerios. Then he needs a diaper change. Then he needs to move and we walk down the aisle, holding hands. We look very cute and everyone smiles. Then we sit down and suck on a boob again. Then we whine really loud, cry a little and finally pass out. It’s still and hour and a half to New York.

Mr. Baby wakes up an hour later and plays with his toys for a bit. The plane lands and I put him back in the Ergo. I  take the car seat thing out and no one helps. It’s time to get the suitcase.  All we need is a little one hour-long drive to Manhattan in a stand-still traffic. Otherwise we made it!

How do people do it with more than one child?

Where did the summer go? Sure, I got my vacation time in but I don’t feel like I really made the best use of it. I just sort of wandered from place to place, without any defined plans and now, I feel like I wasted a whole two months.

I think part of the fun of vacation is the planning and anticipation of it. Thinking out where you’re going to go, how to do it the most economically (more important these days than in the past, no?) and building up the excitement in yourself and others for the “getaway”.

Money is tight for everyone these days and I probably have no right in even thinking about it, but as the school year starts, I am drawn to thinking about my childrens next vacation and what we could do for it. When I was younger, it wasn’t a big deal to get out of school for a vacation as long as you could classify the trip as “educational”. These days and as my boys get older, there just isn’t that opportunity any longer, so as soon as the school calendar comes out, it’s time to plan our trips for the next year.

As I’ve always told people, the best time to plan for your holiday trips is TWO holidays before they happen. Yes, that means NOW is when I would recommend you figure out your winter break plans, while the more affordable options are still available. Whether you’re looking at “rock bottom pricing” just to escape the winter DC weather or getting the best price possible for the trip you’ve always wanted, now, not latter, is the time to start looking into it.

My daughter Sasha on the bench

Dear Friends,

Having spent the first half of my life changing homes every two years, there was only one constant place in my world: Folly House, Kinsale, County Cork, Ireland. This was the house my parents bought in 1972 to allow their four daughters to escape the oppression of Algerian summers. This was the house in which we spent innocent summers surrounded by pastures, overlooking the Bandon River, sunbathing on the dry barn’s roof and listening to Billy Joel and The Eagles under the surprisingly hot Irish sun (when it appeared). This was also the house of my parents’ retirement after my father’s career in the US Information Service. Here we spent many a warm, cozy Christmas before peat fires in the cast iron fireplace, played board games on the great oak refectory table, and heard the mysterious sounds of the beloved Folly House ghost late into the night.

A Kinsale Institution: Max's

In 1998, we all said goodbye to Kinsale, Folly House was sold, and my parents settled in suburban Maryland to be within reach of their daughters’ care and comfort as life wore down their ageing bodies. Eleven years later, after both my parents had left this world, the four daugthers felt it time to return to Kinsale. Our mission: to commemorate our parents’ lives in the place they loved so much and to dedicate a park bench in their honor.

I had mixed feelings setting out for Kinsale–a place so familiar and yet so distant. I knew one can never go back, never relive the joys of the past. So I set out with measured expectations, keeping in check my hope that it would be, in fact, magical.

As my sisters and I gathered, with several children and one brave spouse, we marveled at the comfort of our fisherman’s cottages overlooking the harbor. We toasted our return as the yachts sailed in past the 17th-century forts guarding the town, we smiled at the delighted giggles of our children playing on the small zip line in the gardens below and we reveled in the familiarity of it all.

Our bench dedication took place in a blustery storm (“ah, sure, it will clear by this evening” had reassured several of our Irish friends when we tried to rethink our plan), where my sister Lisa and I stood with umbrellas, perched on the bench itself, attempting to deliver a commemorative address. The wind caught hold of us at one point and threatened to transport us, Mary-Poppins-like, across the Bandon River. The ceremony ended early and we all headed to the shelter of our cars and the reception at my parents’ good friends, the Doyles.

An evening of poetry readings and addresses followed, with memories being shared liberally of my parents’ joie de vivre, their unmatched hospitality, their devotion to friends and family, and their unfailing respect and love for each other.

The following days, we settled into Kinsale like longtime residents. We met for coffee with Irish friends, we went sailing on the harbor, we ran into people we knew in bakeries and pubs, we took the children into town for “99s” (soft serve creamy ice cream pierced by a Cadbury’s Flake), and we went for a stroll along the Salmon Walk to Summercove.

Yacht in front of Charles Fort

One day, sitting perched on a rock above James Fort overlooking both inner and outer harbors, my daughter Sasha remarked “this is so beautiful, Mommy.” I took in the dark blue sea, the sculpted apple-green grass dappled with wild flowers on the hills above us, the rustic grey stones of the fort, and the saturated Irish light and had to agree–yes, this is very beautiful.

In this moment, when my own child stated the obvious, I realized I had never fully appreciated the place of my childhood. I had taken it for granted and made Kinsale a backdrop, rather than a centerpiece.

I had fully expected to close the Kinsale chapter in my life through this one commemorative trip. Yet, I found that, through connecting with old friends, seeing the place through the untainted eyes of my own daughter, I had, in fact, opened a new chapter. Kinsale will always be a part of my fabric, and I now know that I can and want to weave new tales into this tapestry.

Our friend, Mareta Doyle, is chairman of the annual Kinsale Arts Week.  International and local artists of all kinds come to Kinsale to share their talent and enliven the town. This sounds like the perfect enticement to return to Kinsale in summers to come.

As my sisters and I prepared our departure, it became clear that we had come to the same conclusion: we will return–not to commemorate the past, but to make new memories and carry on a family tradition. And if you are ever passing through Kinsale, the “Gourmet Capital of Ireland,” stop by the park on your way out of town, by the “new” bridge, and settle yourself on the only bench there. Take in the beauty of the lush green grass, the wind-bent trees, the deep blue river, and lonely Ringrone tower in the distance. My parents will surely make you feel welcome.

Water parks are awesome. The first one I really remember experiencing was way back when I was about ten and we went to one in New Jersey with my cousins. It was great. Each of the slides had the names of rivers and each one had a different degree of difficulty. The Amazon was really long, the Blue Danube was really fast, the Hudson was really dirty, etc.

I really haven’t been to a really cool water park in a long time. And this one down in the Ozarks is pretty cool. Wave pool, lazy river, kiddie pool with kiddie slides, some really easy beginner slides and then there’s the slides that even stagger the grown ups. One is this nasty half-pipe. It feels like falling off a cliff. But the scariest part is that the half-pipe is bordered by these tiny one foot borders. And they look pretty small when you’re headed at them at the speed of sound and you can count the leaves on the TOP of the oak tree directly behind the slide. Riley, Kinsey and Mom did that one a few times.

Then there’s the toilet bowl. Seriously. You go down this ridiculously steep drop to pick up speed and you get spit out into this bowl. You circle around the bowl until you literally drop through a hole into an 8 foot pool. If you get enough speed, its awesome. If you don’t, you end up like my brother-in-law and me and you slow down so much you need to roll out through the hole.

Then there are the rapids where you go through a series of small slides into small pools. Except the physics and currents present in these pools at the bottoms of the “rapids” tend to trap people who have a large amount of mass and a small amount of mass. So the really big folks and the really small kids are getting stuck in these big groups and the rest us are honking for the right of way. Kinsey got stuck until I came down, completely inverted my tube, righted myself and slammed into Kinz. I felt kinda cool until I realized most of the contents of my nose had evacuated along a path down the right side of my face.

Then there was the yellow and blue slides. Yellow slide is open while the blue is totally enclosed. The blue is faster. It’s also really hard to judge how close you are to the end in total darkness. Veterans of water parks will tell you, as they told me, that if you arch your back really high and only have the backs of your heels and shoulders touching the slide you can approach NASCAR qualifying speeds.

Which is awesome. Until you hit the water at the bottom. You’re so amazed at your ability to approach terminal velocity you forget that upon entering the water at that speed, your nose is vulnerable.

Yup, it was nasty.

But I made such a big splash that Bails decided she wanted to try it. And Bails is in the 25th percentile for height and weight for kids about to enter kindergarten. She’s small. We climb back up to the top of the slide and she goes first. She sat up on her bottom the whole way down and you couldn’t even tell she hit water because her splash was so small. I go down and attempt to sit up the whole way. I hit turn one and firmly introduce the side of face to the side of the slide. The recoil knocks me onto my stomach. This is the point where I remember reading the sign at the top of the slide that read, “No riding on your stomach.” So I correct my position just as I’m hitting the corkscrew. This of course just turned me into this runaway spiraling depth charge. I’m sure if they checked the inside of the slide and my back the ballistics would match.

After my splashdown, Bails suggested that we ride the yellow one next.

We eventually made to the wave pool and skipped the lazy river because the lazy river was, well, just too lazy. I mean by the time made it all the way around the leaves started to change. But the wave pool is fun. Grandma got caught right at the exact spot where the largest waves break. It may have been because she was nudged into it. Eyewitnesses can’t confirm the culprit. Watching her was like watching the perfect storm. She just got pounded. And it’s a wave pool so there is no pause button. They just keep coming.

If you can manage to swim out past all the humanity and get up to the front of the pool where the waves begin, it’s pretty cool. You are going up and down about ten feet. It’s work to stay above water. But you’re also so far out there the kids won’t follow you. So it’s kind of a break even though you’re at serious risk of drowning. But it’s totally worth it.

Tubing is also fun. Especially for kids. This morning we went back into a fairly quiet cove and let six of the girls take turns tubing. Kinsey, Bailey and two of their cousins went first. It was fairly uneventful for a while if you dismiss Kinsey barking out orders and directions throughout the entire episode. She looked like a gunnery sergeant. Then my brother-in-law skipped them over a small wake and caught his first grader to be a little off balance. It was like he caught her leaning towards second base and picked her off. The only part of her body still in contact with the tube were her two hands clutching the handles. The rest of her body was airborne.

But the best part was the girls thought it was hilarious so nobody was crying. And that’s always a good thing.

We’re headed home tomorrow but with only one kid. Grandma decided she’d take Kinsey and Bailey home with her for Grandma camp for a few days. Which will be weird and cool. Bails starts her new day care on Friday and then school starts on the 20th. It’ll be Bails first day of kindergarten. We can’t wait.

So far our yearly vacation has pretty much gone according to plan. The kids wanted to go swimming as soon as we got here. We went to Captain Ron’s for lunch on Monday. We went to the outlet mall on Tuesday to go shopping and the girls were really, really bad. The girls have been before 7 a.m. every morning. And Grandpa’s boat sank.

Seriously. Mom, Grandpa and a few of the eight children here went down to the dock to watch Mom go skiing Monday morning. Minutes later they were back. The boat was filled with water up to the steering wheel. Grandpa called the salvage guy and he cruised over in the “fastest tow boat on the lake.” That’s what he told him anyway. He can get it up to 37 mph if he’s not pulling anything and the water is calm.

Here’s a pic of them pumping water out. Reminded me of Rahm Emmanuel trying to save the O’s health care plan.

Turns out the boat is toast but they saved the motor so that can be used to buy Grandpa a new boat should he decide to get one.

Lucky for us Grandpa and Grandma have some cool friends and a couple of them have a place down here. They also own a pontoon boat. Which is more or less like a floating tailgate party. So we’ve borrowed that for the week.

We’ve sorta taken an informal vote and decided he’d enjoy a pontoon boat himself. And he should name it Liquid Smoke. Mmmm…waffle runoff…

We took it out for an evening cruise Tuesday. Kinsey told me she really liked the pontoon boat. “It’s like sailing in a living room.” We stopped to get gas which annoyed Bails because we had to stop for a little while. But our pitstop did provide us with the opportunity to convince the 18 year-old girl pumping our gas about to enter college this fall to finish. That’s what boating with seven little girls 9 and under will do to a teenager. When we finished and cranked up the speed, Bails turns around to Grandpa and says, “Now we’re cooking!”

Which is much different than how she was behaving a few hours earlier when we told her that she couldn’t go out on a boat ride in her uncle’s boat. She absolutely melted down. Lost her mind. She looked like George Brett when they took away his pine tar homer. Once Kinz gets going she can’t deescalate. She’s genetically predisposed against the development of an exit strategy. She’s like Dick Cheney dealing with liberals. Kinz deploys more and more force and anger. She just ramps up the crying and screaming until she either tires out or realizes her loudness strategy isn’t working.

Our trip to the mall was highlighted by this – we’re waiting outside Children’s Place as Mom loads up on the bargains. She comes out with a t-shirt for Bails that’s says, “Super Sassy” across the front.

To which Bails responds, “I’m not sassy. I’m a rascal.” She is a rascal. However she also sassy. If we were Irish her name would Sassy McRascal.

Anyway today is the day where Grandpa and my two brothers-in-law are golfing. So I’m in the condo with Mom and her sisters and all eight kids. I chose to stay here. It has nothing to do with the fact that I’d be stuck with a couple Hawkeye fans and one Cornhusker fan. But since my nephew just sneezed out most of the snot in his nose onto my leg which was quickly followed by Bails rubbing it in, I’m reevaluating that decision.

I know not golfing puts me in the minority of dudes and Dads, but I just really don’t have any affinity for golf. I’ve been golfing and the best thing I can say about it is that I just don’t get it. Kinda like Green Day. Or cheering for Colorado Buffalo basketball. I mean I like being outside, I like plaid and I enjoy hitting things really hard with a stick but there are other things I’d rather do. Plus golf takes time. It’s not something you can just do. It takes equipment. And a reservation. Plus you’re supposed to play with three other people. I guess it’s kinda like going out to dinner with little kids. You have the same amount of whining, swings and misses and spilled drinks.

Anyhoo, we’re headed to a water park tomorrow. It’s going to be awesome. And expensive.

My mother always recalled to me how much children are like sponges and this analogy fixed in my mind today as my twenty-two month old, her dad and I ventured off to explore the Guanacaste region of Costa Rica for the day. She started off having no idea how to retain her wiggles in the mini bus sans a car seat. Some wiggles and screams out of the way, we set about by boat floating down the Palo Verde River, where the salt of the sea mixes with fresh water creating a bird lover’s paradise.

But monkeys were on her mind, and frogs of course  -  after a grapefruit sized-frog hopped across our path in route to our hotel room on our first night in Costa Rica. Frog fever waned a little as the salty waters drove away our ribbiting friends. There were lots of crocodiles ranging from puny to the size of a very large grown man – but much longer!  Every time my daughter elevated to her tip toes and peered over the edge of the boat I had a moment of fear strike – those nasty crocodiles teeming the waters.

While we peeled our eyes for monkeys we came across lots of other fascinating animals. The snake bird was a particular favorite and the male iguanas with the spikes on their back. The tiny bats that I was sure were just bumps on a tree until one flew away as the sound of the boat’s motor approached were cute little herbivores. My daughter’s vocabulary grew by the second as she called out to the creatures, scaring them away more than hithering them to us. I am sorry to the rest of the boat passengers who missed a view due to her excitement!

When the monkeys were finally spotted she got off the boat with her dad and walked through the tall grass to call to the howler monkey. It called back and made known its feelings about being disturbed in it’s slumber. I wondered as I watched from the boat how much she would remember of this trip.

She ate a typical Costa Rica meal after we departed the river and questioned, “hear that?” every time a rooster crowed. She thanked everyone in sight for her “eggies” from the baby chicken and was quite pleased with the mango juice. As the day grew on she sounded more like a child familiar with Costa Rican wildlife than our toddler who left the city less than a week ago. While she may not remember the details of her excursions in this country, she’s coming back with pails full of new knowledge – a sponge for sure…

At certain points in your life you reach milestones. Some are of huge strategic important to the rest of your life. Like having a child. Or getting the NFL Network. Others are minor in comparison, but at the time they occur they seem like a really big deal. Like changing your first diaper and, more joyously, changing your last diaper.

Diapers are something I don’t miss. At all. Diapers are one of the humbling things God bestows upon new parents. Diapers and having to carry around a diaper bag and pushing a stroller. Nothing grounds you more than cleaning up poop. I do miss the girls being babies sometimes because, well, they couldn’t talk, they slept. A lot. And they were immobile. I long for the days when breakfast was just Riley and me and all it took was some cheerios in front of her and she was quiet. Now she engages in CIA level psychological experimentation on her sisters.

Anyway, we reached a major milestone today. July 31, 2009 is the last day at daycare for us. Mom’s work has an onsite child development center. They’ve taken care of our kids since the first day we dropped Riley off back in late February of 2000. I dropped Bailey off for the last time this morning. I was not sad. I’ve gone to this place nearly every single week day for the last 9 and a-half years. And while they did an absolutely awesome job of taking care of the girls, I’m not going to miss it. But I’m certain they will miss the monthly subsidy we were paying them. It’s like having another mortgage and a-half. If we hadn’t had these damn kids we could have a vacation home and a really cool car that didn’t require us to know the reach of each girl in order to keep them out each other’s punching radius.

Thankfully, starting next month, all three girls will be in the same school building for the first time since August of ’05 when Riley started kindergarten. They will all be dropped off and picked up at the same place for the next three years. You have no idea the happiness and elation this has caused me. Any simplification of logistics is a big deal. Like Forrest Gump said, “one less thing, that’s good.” The first day of school in August will easily be the second or third best day of 2009.

#1 – February 1, 2009. Santonio Holmes. Two Feet. Touchdown. Super Bowl Champs.
#2 – Possibly replaced by the first day of school this year but for right now, it is June 19. The girls first airplane ride goes without incident. The sense of relief I had upon landing in Florida was indescribable.

The minor milestone we also reached today was that it is the last work day prior to our annual family excursion to the Ozarks. The reputation of this trip has grown into epic mythological proportions which of course includes the “Dr. D and Grandma D” stories. Eight adults and now eight children – seven of them little girls are included on this vacation. Seems like we add a kid every other year. My nephew is just one and right now being fawned on by your sister and your six girl cousins is pretty cool. But at some point, probably when he’s 4 or 5, he’s going to sit back and think to himself, “man, I got a crappy deal, this blows.”

Then when he’s about 13 he’s going to think it’s cool again as long as his sister and cousins are bringing their friends over.

Anyhow, we still have some packing and other stuff to get down tonight before we head out in the morning. For a review of last year’s trip, click on the August 2008 tab to the right.

In Jackson, NH there is an inn that has the charm and history that one would expect from an inn in New Hampshire.  The Christmas Farm Inn I last visited as a child and was excited to go back. 

Before checking in we decided to drive up nearby Mt. Washington – a precarious drive that is well worth the nail biting turns and lack of guard rails.  It was 75 degrees at the base of the mountain and by the time we got to the top the temperature was 36 with 65 mph winds.  I had seriously underestimated the temperature change and had not dressed myself or the kids properly.  So much for shorts and flip flops.  Thankfully we picked a day that was clear on top of the mountain – an event that is extremely rare.

The Christmas Farm Inn (www.christmasfarminn) is a charming place with a wide array of different types of rooms and cottages.  It is essentially a sprawling compound that has accommodations for all tastes and budgets.  Breakfast was included in our stay and I expected a typical muffin and egg buffet.  To my surprise it was a full breakfast menu with the type of hearty, Eggs Benedict/yummy pancakes with all the fixin’s that is not the usual when a hotel says “breakfast included”.  The food was phenomenal and the staff was very concerned and accommodating to my son’s peanut allergy.  As I’ve stated in previous posts my son also has mild wheat, corn , soy and egg allergies that I thankfully can overlook on occasion with no repercussions and on this day my son “really, really wanted pancakes”.  Who could blame him…they were awesome.

A rare clear (but freezing) day on top of Mt. Washington.

For those of you who have never been to Portsmouth, NH you are truly missing out.  The small town located on the coast of New Hampshire is loaded with charm, history and great restaurants.  You can spend your day taking a boat ride out to the historic Isle of Shoals, relaxing on nearby beaches  or browsing through the many shops and galleries. 

One of our favorite places to go for food in town is a row of restaurants known as the decks.  All the restaurants have outdoor seating on the water overlooking the Piscataqua River.  Tugboats dot the shoreline and lobster meals are plentiful. 

Not being a fan of shellfish I can’t comment on the seafood but you know it is good.  I have taken to searching for meals that can accommodate my son’s food allergies and compared to a visit a couple years ago I was pleasantly surprised.  We ate at The River House which is located along the decks and I found it very accommodating to special diets.  Our waitress was a vegan and her knowledge of  the food and preparation was outstanding.  She was able to handle my sons special dietary needs with ease. 

Portsmouth is a town loaded with artists, students, fishermen and professionals.  It’s eclectic style allows for a diverse array of food and fun for everyone…with or without food allergies.

Airlines’ already suck, and now they are adding one more burden to travelers: higher fees for checked luggage. American announced last Friday that the first checked bag will cost $20, up from $15, and the second bag $30, up from $25. The fees don’t apply to members of their loyalty program gold or higher, but effect everyone else immediately. Other airlines are likely to follow.

American is the third largest carrier serving Hawaii, and most people who come on vacation check bags. Likewise, residents traveling off island laden with gifts and heavier clothing usually do, too. How can you beat the checked bag fees? In this post, I’ll update a post I wrote last year on the topic and share some of my strategies and those of other frequent fliers who travel with only carry-on luggage.

Commit to Carry-on

Unless your traveling with children, the first step may be the hardest: committing to carry everything you need on board the plane. This means no full-sized bottles of shampoo or perfume, no large or bulky items, and forget about that third pair of shoes.

Tip: With the money you’ll save in checked bag fees, you can always buy more shampoo or shoes if needed at your destination.

If you’re still not sure about going carry-on or travel with children, find a way to become a tiered member of your preferred airline’s frequent flier program (such as Gold with American or Premier with United). Once you have that status, the airlines will waive checked luggage fees for now.

Tip: Most airlines waive checked bag fees for tiered members of their loyalty programs.

But it’s important to keep in mind that cash-strapped airlines have been cutting back on freebies to loyalty members for years, and eventually, checked bag fees could apply to all passengers. So if you can make the commitment to carry on now, you’ll be ahead of the game.

It Takes Two

Now that you’re going carry-on-only, you’re allowed only two pieces of luggage: one that fits in the overhead bin (the “carry-on”) and one that fits under the seat in front of you (your “personal item”).

Tip: You can also bring a coat, an umbrella and a sack lunch in addition to your carry-on and personal items.

Don’t waste precious luggage space with these free-pass items. For example, carry your coat, even if it’s summer where you are and winter where you are going. (NOTE: this does not apply at Heathrow International Airport. If you’re flying to or through Heathrow, you’re only allowed one item through security, period.)

Use the overhead bin for carry-on luggage

Depending on which airlines you fly and the types of aircraft they operate, finding the right luggage can get a bit tricky.  Almost certainly, you’re old checked luggage won’t fit in the over head bin. If you’re not sure, measure your existing luggage and compare it against overhead bin sizes.

Tip: The first step is to check your airline of choice’s carry-on size restrictions.

Once you know the dimensions of the overhead bin, you can find suitable luggage either by shopping for a new or used bag or digging out an old, smaller bag from the back of the closet.

Finding out the dimensions of the underseat area is a bit trickier than bin space. Underseat spaces vary in size. You might get more specifics if you call and ask the airline directly.

Tip: A bag with the dimensions of 16 x 15 x 9 in will generally fit under the seat in front on most aircraft.

Examples include Eagle Creek’s wheeled in-flight tote (the bag I use), Travelon’s underseat tote, TravelPro’s Crew 7 rolling tote, and most rolling backpacks (just be careful not to overstuff).

Often at the aisle there are railings under the seats that make the space too narrow. Sometimes there are objects including electronics bolted under the seats, decreasing the amount of storage space.

Tip: Check with SeatGuru.com: Select a specific airline, aircraft and they will give you warnings on the seats that have no storage (bulkheads) and those that have limited storage due to a box or other hardware protruding down from the seat.

To Bring or Not to Bring

Now that you have the correct luggage, how you pack makes a huge difference in your comfort carrying the bags around and how easily they fit into their designated spots on the airplane.

Tip: Start by asking yourself this question for each item: How will I use this and is there something else in my bag that already serves this purpose? If so, eliminate items that serve the same need.

For example, during most vacations typical travelers only need only one dressy item, such as slacks, a skirt or dress. If you’re packing both a skirt and a dress, leave one at home. Instead, bring an extra set of accessories to change the look if you’ll be attending multiple dressy events.

Do I really need this one, too?

An easy way to overpack is with casual clothes for daytime. At home, you probably wear a clean shirt and pants everyday, and when you’re packing you think you need the same for each day of your trip. But consider some alternatives to packing 7, 10 or 14 casual shirts.

Tip: Do laundry — Pack enough clothes for 3 days only and plan to wash your clothes either in the sink or at a laundromat. You’ll be amazed how much bulk you’ll shed. Dressing in layers helps to eliminate the feeling of wearing the same thing every day.

Tip: Shop there — If you’re going somewhere with great shopping, plan to buy a few more things there. Don’t load up your suitcase in advance.

Finally, organizing your packing is critical to maximizing space. A few years ago, I discovered packing cubes and folders and now find them utterly indispensable. I organize my clothes according to three categories: t-shirts, socks/underwear and larger folded items (such as jeans, button-down shirts, and jackets).

Using cubes also saves time packing because I already know where to put everything. They  save time retrieving items because I know where to find everything. No more pulling out all my clothes to find a pair of socks. End of packing chaos.

Tip: Use packing cubes and folders to maximize space and save time packing.

Skip It or Ship It

If you can’t fit an item (or 10) into your luggage either before you depart or before you come home, consider shipping it ahead of yourself.

Large Priority Mail flat rate boxes cost about $14 to ship without a weight limit

Tip: Shipping a large flat-rate Priority Mail box with the US Postal Service costs about $14, and you can stuff it to the top with any items that might put you over the airline’s size or weight limits.  Plus, USPS will pick up your package for free at most residences.

If you decide to ship items, even internationally, you’ll still save money if you don’t have to check a bag. And that adds up to more money for your trip.

Happy travels!

]]> http://foodallergybag.wordpress.com/2009/07/26/day-3-4-driving-triathalon-driving/ Sun, 26 Jul 2009 14:40:24 +0000 Food Allergy Bulletin http://foodallergybag.wordpress.com/2009/07/26/day-3-4-driving-triathalon-driving/

At the end of Day 2 we were in western Maryland visiting with friends.  It was great because they have kids of similar age to mine so the kids were happy to be out of the car and running.  My husband and I got to enjoy some adult conversation with someone other than each other which was necessary for the marriage after two long days of driving. 

That evening we had a small birthday party for one of the children we were visiting, complete with cake and ice cream.  I had packed a Liberty Bakery (www.libertybakeryonline.com) cupcake for my son which he promptly gobbled up.  He is always disappointed when he can’t eat what every one else is eating but Liberty Bakery puts out such great products it is hard to be sad for too long.  Since their products are free of the big eight allergens and made in a completely dedicated facility their products are worry free. 

The kids bunked together that evening and then we were up and heading over to the Baltimore area to stay at another Hampton Inn.  My husband was doing a triathlon in Perryville, MD the following day so we stayed close by since we had to get there for 6:30 check in.

I am certainly no expert on triathlons but this one was set up in a park that was perfect for kids.  There was plenty of room for the kids to play without interfering with any of the athletes.  There was a play structure, baseball fields and tons of empty space, all over looking the Chesapeake Bay.  It was a nice day and my husband achieved his goal of successfully completing an Olympic Triathlon.  Congrats!

Upon completion of the race we hopped in the car and headed north with a destination of Portsmouth, NH.  It was a long drive and we knew we weren’t going to get there until almost midnight so we were prepared for any meltdowns that may occur.  Fortunately for us the kids were amazing and handled the drive with ease. 

In Connecticut we stopped at Bertucci’s for some dinner and were very happy with how knowledgeable the staff was with food allergies.  The waitress easily answered all my questions and informed the kitchen of our concerns.  I am finding that most restaurants have really stepped up their staff training on food allergies which makes such a big difference when eating out.  I am adding Bertucci’s to our list of favorites and since they are all over the place I know I will be stopping at another one before our trip is over.

Whether you’re planning a day trip or a longer summer vacation, if you’re the parent of a young child, you already know that traveling with children can often be challenging. The two most important pieces of advice are to be prepared, and to be flexible.

If you’re traveling by plane with a child three years old or younger, bring along her car seat. It’s familiar since she’s used to riding in it, and you won’t have to worry about her squirming out of a conventional seat belt.

If you’re traveling with an infant, carry a fully stocked diaper bag with 50% more diapers than you think you need, extra formula, baby food and snacks and at least one (but ideally two) full changes of clothing. If your child uses a pacifier, be sure to travel with at least one extra one, in case one gets lost or rolls under the seat.

Let older children each pack a backpack or tote bag full of toys, books and crafts to play with en route.

Additionally, you should pack a bag with small treats and surprises to use when the going gets rough. Some ideas: removable stickers are great on the windows (it’s like a giant Colorforms board); new boxes of crayons are always a hit; books on tape, available at your local library, are a good source of entertainment. When my kids were little, we had “purple car totes”, plastic boxes with handles that we stocked with pads, crayons, markers, plastic figures, and a small snack. Because they were used only for long rides, their novelty did not wear off, and the kids were always excited to see what new surprises had been added to the box.

Other must-haves for traveling: plenty of wet wipes, lots of tissues, Purell, and a stash of juice boxes and portable snacks for when the “I’m hungry’s” hit.

To keep items your child’s things organized in the car, consider either an over the seat storage bag or use a seat belt to secure an open plastic bin next to the child to keep books and toys close at hand. Extra supplies can be kept in a plastic tote in the trunk.

One family I know uses car time to assemble their family albums. The kids take turns selecting photos and attaching them.

Increase your repertoire of car games. While classics like “I pack my trunk” are always fun, consider various storytelling games that get the whole family involved. One such game is to take turns coming up with two characters that the next person has to use in a story. Another story game is to have one person begin telling a story and after a few sentences the next person continues the narrative, and so on. The stories are usually pretty funny and can go on for quite a while. There are many books on travel games available at your local bookstore or library.

Before you leave, buy a lined notebook for each child and let him make a travel journal. Pre-writers can dictate their entries to you. Let your child buy a postcard at each site or city and paste it into his journal. This is a wonderful way to keep your trip alive long after you’ve returned.

Remember, when the children are happy, everyone is happy! Have a wonderful trip!

Traveling should be fun and exciting but if you will travel with your kids, the trip could bring you a lot of stress. With careful planning, traveling with your children will be easier. You also have to anticipate any problem that could arise during the trip that concerns your children’s safety to make the trip enjoyable and hassle-free. Here are some tips for a safe travel with your children.

Traveling should be fun and exciting but if you will travel with your kids, the trip could bring you a lot of stress. Traveling with your children will be easier with careful planning and if you are prepared.

Traveling with grandchildren is very different from traveling with your own children. Even though it seems that they are like your children, they really belong to their parents.

The main thing you need to check for is how much room there is between the bars of the crib; if this space is too wide, your child could be in danger of getting his or her head stuck between the slats. It is always better to be safe than sorry, and if you can, pack your own bassinet or sleeping area for your small child.

As you will know, your anxiety and agitation is easily passed onto your children therefore ensure that you plan your route and be as relaxed as possible during the journey. This will in turn ensure your children are equally as relaxed as you are. Give yourself plenty of time to arrive at your destination and cater for any unscheduled stops.

Talk to your child while driving; communication is always a good idea. However, avoid using your cell phone or playing with the radio too much, etc. Having a child in the car is distraction enough, and you don’t want to add any more distractions into the mix.

When you are not away from home and spend the day with your kids, how many hours in the day do you spend attending to them? How much time during the day are you not either preparing their meals, feeding them, cleaning up after them, running errands, or getting them ready for bed.

For added kids playground safety, the equipment itself should be sturdy and constructed correctly. Any protrusions from the ground in your backyard, like tree roots, rocks and other sharp objects, should be removed before installing a backyard playset.

Make sure that kids are buckled in safely. It is not wise to move around in a moving vehicle. Encourage them to play card games at the table or other less active activities. Don’t over schedule your trip and don’t rush yourselves.

At least have six diapers for the baby, I calculate one diaper every two hours or three. I am sure this may vary from child to child. Pack some pull ups for your toddlers for just in case. If your baby is still drinking formula, carry the powder kind as it will be easier to go through security.

Information on Manali and Hotels Manali

Last weekend we went to Belgium. We caught the Eurotunnel from Folkstone and arrived in Calais VERY early it was only just becoming light. We were both a little tired, as we had been awake since 2.30am. You see Miss 3.5 joined us in bed and then woke us both up and we couldn’t sleep.

Anyay we flew down the freeway as best we could due to dense fog and arrived an hour after we got of the Eurotunnel. Isn’t that amazing? I think so. 3 hours before we had been in the UK and in 2 hours we had been in 3 countries lol I digress.

I booked the Hotel Navarra Best western I was a little worried but it was in the actual town and this was a good start I was hoping. It was to say the least above our expectations and the room was enormous they had on site parking and allowed us the next day to stay parked there so we didn’t have to go to a parking station. The first day we just wandered around

It is a very beautiful city, easy to walk around. It was heaving with Tourists OMG HEAVING there are horse and carts everywhere and for €35 you can ride in one, it’s totally worth it they tell you all the little nitty gritty stories about some of the older buildings which unless you were on a tour you wouldn’t know. The kids LOVED the horse ride goodness me absoulte highlight of the whole trip for Eliza

Ugh am I a yummy mummy or what check that muffin top out………

We bought some Lace, we felt compelled the tourist lace shops where everywhere. We’ve stuck it in the guest room so we rarely have to see the grandma affect to often. But we assume our guests will appreciate that little Belgie touch lol

We ate at a very nice seafood restaurant which when you have got a nearly 16 month old child who hates sitting down, who hates crowds, who hates pretty much anything you want him to do makes for a very long lunch and a lot of dirty looks. Unal drank his last beer on his own I think that says it all.

The people are fabulous just don’t let your kids out of your sight, no seriously. Seriously they are lovely people they all speak English better than any other foreign country I have been to, they are not offended when you don’t speak their native tongue immediately. Very welcoming.

I highly recommend visiting it’s small so the weekend was kind of enough really, but If you are staying in Brussels I would say it’s a place you don’t want to miss out on!

SMUK in travelbugsville