Why is it that whenever I turn on the TV I see the same terrible droid commercials?

I hate this one: “Luk at dem dere cellphones! Deys fallin’ from space!”

Do I just have bad luck? Why don’t I ever see the ones like this on TV?

A 120 second Direct Response TV commercial made for the Bowa Bottled Water System. Shot with the Red 4k camera.

Cue up the music folks! It’s time for The Good The Bad and The Ugly. And Just like meatloaf always said, ‘one out of three ain’t bad’…or something along those lines.

Without further ado:

The Good: Ford

I love the simultaneous emotional and rational appeal. I recently read a study that supports a long held hypothesis of mine. “EMOTIONAL ADS WORK”

With that said, you still have to be able to compete with rival brands on the essentials of the product.

I love the way Ford trucks are portrayed as a really good teammate and not a labor saving device. The spots are memorable, informative and evocative.

Kind of makes me want a Canyonero.

The Bad: Ram

What sells trucks?

Postmodern poetry right?

Wait.

That’s not it.

I like this commercial from an aesthetic point of view but I don’t think this is going to sell trucks.

Also, their free verse, or whatever that is, sucks.

The Ugly: Chevy

If you are going to hitch your wagon to a song, it better be a really effing good song.

John Melloncamp doesn’t make good songs, so this project was doomed in the womb.

To make matters worse Chevy over exposed these ads so much that they actually started getting lampooned by sports writers.

Waste of celluloid.

[H/T GAC]

Insert Mandatory Kanye West Joke.

Insert another Mandatory Kanye West Joke.

OK, with those out of the way, I just thought I’d mention that I got sucked into watching the AMAs yesterday (Thanks Lauren!). I actually got pretty depressed about the current state of music after seeing the Black Eyed Peas Keytar orgy and witnessing Jay-Z’s decline into Vegas act territory (“I’m the new Sinatra” –> yep).

Back on topic: Taylor Swift accepted 4,436,043 awards tonight.

What peaked my interest was the part of the broadcast where Taylor Swift mentioned her twitter followers in her thank you speech.

As soon as she uttered it I went online and checked her twitter page (@taylorswift13). At 10:44 pm on Sunday night she had 1,897,164 followers. Not too shabby.

At 12:45 AM Monday morning she was up to 1,898,987. She gained 1,823 followers. That is more followers than I have (@fakejeffvitkun), but I don’t advertise on ABC.

It is officially time to be worried about traditional media when a mention during the program of a highly rated prime time show only yields 2 thousand followers.

P.S. last night’s American Dad episode reminded me why I love music. (I never thought I’d type that sentence)

Crazy Video Edition. Tips? jvitkun at yahoo.

[H/T @blamping RT @koks]

I love these ads.

I like this fake ad too.

[H/T Adfreak]

Real news with fake quotes. Tips? jvitkun at yahoo.

Virgin Mobile wants you to keep talking; “Al Bundy disaproves of this ad”

Adidas helps Children in Bangladesh; “By giving them jobs!”

Have you seen the new Pyrex cookware line? “It’s like Pampered Chef but for anti-social types”

Coca-Cola is a philanthropist, cut-throat capitalist; “People like it when you spend millions of dollars telling them how nice you are right?”

Do you see the ad in this screen?

Look closely in the lower right hand corner.

There it is.

That’s 2 square centimeters of genius.

PTI and Guinness share a demographic, which is always nice, but this ad goes beyond just picking a good partner.

PTI plays on the flat screens of every bar in the country during happy hour. Guiness just got some valuable ad space during a time of day when lots of people are deciding if they’d like a pint.

Nice job.

OK, maybe I’m crazy but tell me if you don’t see a sleazy message below the radar here.

Direct Quote: “Do you ever have trouble putting on a condiment?”

My perverted ears immediately heard “Do you have trouble putting on a condom?”

After that, I viewed the rest of the commercial through a sexually tinted lens.

Her face says: “Yes he does and I find it hard to find sexual pleasure with this man that I’m slightly taller than”

His face says: “Yes and it sure is destroying my self confidence”

Direct Quote: “I know I do”

I find this part of the commercial interesting. Is Jimmy Football trying to throw me a bone here? Is this a subtle way of saying “it happens to a lot of guys”?

Fake Quote that works pretty well here: “Well here is a phallic solution to a problem that we’ve framed in sexual terminology”

Oh no! he’s getting his sauce everywhere!

Direct Quote: “I hate fumbling around with condiments!”

Seriously, aren’t they laying it on a little thick here? I’ve heard the phrase “fumbling around with the condom” about a million times. This has to be intentional.

What’s this? He gets the giant phallic condiment gun and two young women randomly appear to help him with his wienie!

Why is Jimmy football spraying the audience with imaginary condiments?

It’s a Blast!

So in conclusion, drinking bud light will make you a man. It will make you a man that has condom (ment)  free threesomes; a man that sprays infomercial audiences with semen. It’s also like, good for tailgates and stuff.

Turns out Peyton Manning can shill a companys product just as easily as he can dissect a top-rated defense.

Over the last decade, he has appeared in countless TV spots selling everything from credit cards to televisions. Here are the ten best Manning commercials.

Source:
http://fansided.com/2009/11/13/peyton-mannings-ten-best-tv-commercials/

These are some of the TV ads I’ve seen in the past week that have really caught my attention.

1. IKEA’s Kitchen Commercial

Hilarious spot that shows a couple going into the kitchen after dinner and giving the appliances a pep talk, locker room style. Love the guy giving the  fridge a chest bump at the end. (Unfortunately, I could only find this crappy video of the ad)

2. Meow  Mix Piano Commercial

Ok, obviously anything with a cat in it gets my attention, but this ad really is funny! Love how the cat  is just chillin, all nonchalant, as this lady tries to catch him in the act.

3. Miracle Whip shows Stephen Colbert who’s boss

If you’ve seen the Miracle Whip TV spots, they are kind of silly – very lifestyle-driven and ending with the tagline, “Don’t be mayo” (meaning, don’t be boring).

When Stephen Colbert saw these ads, he came to mayo’s defense, stating for the record that he loves mayo. The war of words between Colbert and Miracle Whip culminated this week as Miracle Whip took out a full-page print ad to announce they had bought a spot in every commercial during the Stephen Colbert show.  And this is what showed up during every commercial break:

Movie Poster 27x40

Seed of Chucky (also known as Child’s Play 5: Seed Of Chucky, Child’s Play 5 or SOC) is a 2004 American horror film, which is the fifth entry in the popular Child’s Play series. Seed of Chucky follows the events of Bride of Chucky and stars Jennifer Tilly (who plays herself and also voices Tiffany), Billy Boyd (as the voice of Glen/Glenda), and Brad Dourif (as Chucky). The film features rapper Redman, director John Waters and S Club star Hannah Spearritt. It was written and directed by Don Mancini, who created Child’s Play and has written all sequels to date. With this entry, Mancini marked his directorial debut.

The film, shot in Romania, continues the series’ evolution from the pure-horror genre of the first movie to a hybrid horror-comedy. Besides spoofing other horror movies, the film references domestic dramas and tabloid television. This film also counts as the first film in the series to contain nudity.

Buy this title only $9.99

Jennifer Tilly

Trivia:

• The script was originally offered to Universal in 1998, who turned it down. Focus Features (a division of Universal Studios) finally picked up the movie in 2003.
• Filmed on the largest soundstage in Romania and the second-largest soundstange in Europe where Cold Mountain (2003) was also shot.
• Because Focus Features has a reputation for yielding eloquent, “artsy” independent films, Rogue Pictures was created as an off-shoot to release this movie.
• Jennifer Tilly wanted to lose weight to play herself in the movie, but she and Don Mancini inserted “fat jokes” into the script in case she didn’t make it.
• The TV spots for this movie displays an unusual disclaimer: Britney Spears Does Not Appear In This Movie. This disclaimer was inserted into TV spots because Britney’s management was concerned that people might be lead to believe that Britney actually appears in the movie. It is not her in the movie; but a look-alike.
• The wife of the man Tiffany calls to apologize to is the widow of the cop she killed at the beginning of Bride of Chucky (1998).
• The gender confused child of Chucky and Tiffany is named either Glen or Glenda by his parents. Glen or Glenda (1953) was Edward D. Wood Jr.’s film in which Wood himself portrayed the transvestite known as Glen or Glenda.
• When the floor manager at the beginning of the film shouts “Hey, Tiffany’s left arm is loose again” and then the arm grabs his crotch, this is an in-joke as revealed on the DVD commentary for Bride of Chucky (1998). Jennifer Tilly explains that Chucky’s left arm kept grabbing her breasts during shoots.
• The First film to be made by Rogue Pictures.
• As revealed on the DVD’s commentary the directors and producer had difficulty agreeing on the look of Glen. The director wanted to give him his own look and style but the producer felt that he should have features similar to Chucky because after all Glen is his son. As a result Glen was given blue eyes, red hair, and freckles like Chucky. Glen’s blue eyes and red hair however are a different shade than Chucky’s.
• As revealed on the DVD commentary because of the low budget the crew were unable to shoot the much bigger Chucky vs Glen fight that was in the shooting script.
• Chris Sarandon was approached to reprise his role as Det. Mike Norris from the first film, but turned it down due to scheduling conflicts.

Real news with fake quotes. Tips? jvitkun at yahoo.

BMW makes an absolutely stunning commercial; “We were hoping that a bunch of bloggers would make ball jokes and this thing could go viral”

Chris Brogan wants you to blog well; “You probably should limit your lolcat posts to a 1:15 ratio” [ed note: NO CAN DO!]

Servant of Chaos is a good person touting a good idea; “It would be pretty crass if a blogger made up a fake quote just to stick to his fake quote meme here”

Robin Goad of Hitwise touches on an interesting economic indicator: Hits to property web sites; “Unfortunately most people were just checking to see how bad things really are we believe.”