So I was bored, and obviously I didn’t have the time nor the patience to try out the 85 Ways to Tie a Tie, as popularly researched by Thomas Fink and Yong Mao at Cambridge, but I did however attempt to educate myself with at least 6 iterations from the reduced list of 13 aesthetic knots: (1) The Pratt; (2) The Half-Windsor; (3) The Full Windsor; (4) The Four-in-Hand; (5) The ever-reliable Small Knot; and (6) The Nicky (or self-releasing Pratt).

Some quaint pictures to give you an idea of the math behind it:

From Fink and Mao’s Research Paper

From Fink and Mao’s Research Paper

You can check out a condensed version of their paper here.

It’s amazing. )

Don’t panic!

Just throw it in the wash, and lay it flat to dry.  It will probably come un-tied in the wash, but that is okay.  I’ll show you how to re-tie it in a minute.  You will probably need to press it to get it nice and flat again.

Okay, lets get started… I’m going to use a solid neck band, so it is easy to see.

First, the wide part goes under the band, toward the top.  Like this:

Then, you bring the skinny part of the tie over to the left side

You then bring the wide part of the tie over the band, and under the skinny part of the tie.

See, so far so good!

Next, you bring the end of the skinny part of the tie under the band, so the end of the tie ends up above the band.  This is where you will want to adjust the length of the tie, just make sure the wide portion is at the correct length for your little guy.

The next part is a little tricky,  take the skinny part at the top and bring it over theband, and under the “knot”.

You will then take the skinny part and pull it to the back of the tie and pull on it to tighten the knot.

Then you pull the two sides of the band and adjust the knot, so it doesn’t have any wrinkles in it.

Ta-Da!  Now you have your perfectly tied tie.

Just waiting for more food and dirt to find its way on to it.  But that’s okay, because now you know how to re-tie it.

I know learning how to tie a tie is a little cliche, but I found this clip and I thought it gave pretty good instructions on how to conquer the tie. I am still pretty surprised how many people don’t know how to though! Thanks Mexx

I remember Larry Hagman’s J.R. Ewing character very well. On Friday nights when I was about 11 or 12, my family would eat dinner on a Friday night, and then watch The Dukes of Hazzard on CBS, followed by Dallas, which was a show about lots of things I didn’t yet understand. For instance, it was several years before I realized that “the Cartel” they always spoke about on the show was referring to OPEC. I was a smart kid in some ways, but utterly clueless in others.

I was saddened to hear that Larry Hagman died recently, but I have something that I remember about him. And sharing those remembrances is what I do in this space, so here goes:

I watched a lot of TV when I was a kid. Gilligan’s Island, the Brady Bunch, Get Smart, F-Troop, and whatever else was on when the Cubs’ game wasn’t on. And so one day I was watching an old rerun of I Dream of Jeanie. I don’t know why I remember this, but it was a black and white episode, since it was one of those shows that was in both black and white and in color. The first season, beginning in the fall of 1965, was in black and white, but by 1966 everything was in color. So that narrows it down as to when the episode I’m thinking of was filmed.

Anyway, Larry Hagman played Tony Nelson on the show, and in this particular episode he was talking to his friend, Roger Healey. And as he was doing so, he tied a tie around his neck. I watched the motions that Hagman made on the television screen and thought “I can do that.” So I went into my Dad’s closet, took out a tie, and stood in front of a mirror. And after a time or two of practicing, I had learned how to tie a tie. So that’s something that Larry Hagman taught me how to do, entirely by accident.

I probably wear a tie two or three times a year, at the most. The act of putting on a tie for everyday use is something that’s dropped off quite a bit since the 1960s. But the next time I put one on, I’ll be sure to think of Larry Hagman.

How To Tie A Bow Tie 101

Take Notes Men …

But then things didn’t go as planned.

My three year-old nephew loves to swing my giant teddy bear around by using the Beatles tie I’ve wrapped around its neck. This morning, I saw it, and realized it’s no longer a tie knot but rather, just a solid, thick knot. So, I untied it and proceeded to drape the now very long and stretched out tie around my neck thinking I would have no problem remembering how to tie a tie. For Christ’s sake, I worked at a job where I had to WEAR a tie. Granted, this was about ten years ago, but still, I thought it’d be like riding a bike and it would all just come back to me.

Nope. Not even close.

I tried a good solid fifteen times before I finally huffed and threw the tie down on my bed. I continued to unpack, did some laundry but as soon as I walked back in my room and saw that damn tie, I found myself trying again. And by this point, I had thought about what a great blog post it could be, writing about instinct and how even though it’s been years, my hands were still able to tie a tie even though my mind lagged behind it, but again…

Nope. Not even close.

I tried though, and tried and tried and then finally got in front of a mirror, where I channeled up my days at I’Cugini, where I would stand in their employee bathroom at the age of twenty-five and tie that tie around my neck five days a week. Ahhhh.. It didn’t exactly work. But I don’t like to fail at things, so I kept at it.

And this time, I did come close. But by no means did I tie this MF’ing tie.

So, now my blog post is about acceptance.

I have accepted I cannot for the life of me

remember

how

to tie

a tie.

The Windsor Knot

Alright Gentlemen, I’ve been having tons of fun posting cool videos, cartoons and mindless drivel for the past week to get an audience.  Now lets get down to brass tacks.  As you all know, today is Easter Sunday and one of the eight days of Passover.  Maybe you went to church today, and perhaps you did not. It could be that you do not practice any religion.  That’s fine with me.  If you did go, I hope you dressed up for the occasion.  I’m talking shirt, tie, blazer, maybe even a suit… (you wore jeans didn’t you?  thought so…)

Seriously men… what gives? It’s time to grow up and start dressing like a Man.  I would like to take this opportunity to show you men out there how to properly tie a tie.  I’ve been scouring the Web searching for a no-nonsense video of a perfect Windsor knot.  Yes – the full Windsor knot.  That elusive perfect triangle of fabric that says ~ “I am a Man, and I have come to conquer the universe!”

Don’t be afraid gentlemen, this isn’t rocket science.  It’s a necktie – don’t let it beat you….

Check out this video that slowly and without any dialog takes you through the process – don’t be scared fellas – this is easy and you all should know how to do this:

For those of you engineers out there that need a diagram, here you go…

The trick is to keep the tie pulled tight as you make each pass.  You want a nice tight triangle shape to the tie when you pull it up to your neck.  (keep in mind, you don’t have to choke yourself ~ the way things are trending today, it’s perfectly acceptable to leave that top button undone and use the tie to cinch the collar together loosely – then again, if you can’t button the top button, you might need to get properly fitted at a tailor and know your size…)

Tie-A-Tie.Net

Four in Hand Knot Asymmetrical tie knot, good for button-down shirts	Pratt Knot Tidy & fairly wide tie knot, suited for any dress shirt
Half Windsor Knot Symmetrical tie knot, goes with any dress shirt	Windsor Knot Wide & triangular tie knot, good for spread collar shirts

I have always admired men who could be a shirt/tie/jacket together.  I also notice when guys do not look put together.  Either their knot is too small, their tie is too short, or the colors are just all wrong.  Hopefully this website can help a a few more guys look just a little bit more put together.  I also imagine taking a tie off at the end of the day feels very similar to taking off a pair of heels at the end of the day.

The Yoke- The yoke of a shirt is the piece of fabric that rest across the shoulders. The yoke allows for movement and can be altered to make the shirt fit properly.

The shirt above has a single yoke panel, or is simply called a plain yoke. The shirt bellow has a split yoke.

Now for the TIE!

Lets start with a little history first.  The tie is thought to have originated during the Thirty Years War of 1600′s. The first known publication on how to tie a tie (or a cravat has they were) appeared in September of 1818. It was called the Neckclothitania. The following is a page out of the book:

The Neckclothitania was prints as a joke, making fun of how many knots and methods had come along.

In Today’s world there still more knots and methods of tying ties than one person can count but two knots that are generally wore by most men, the full windsor knot and the half windsor knot. Bellow are videos of how to tie these knots.

For more information on the subject of ties visit The Art Manliness.

What sort of things does this include?

1. Change a roll of film.
2. Defeat an internet virus.
3. Drive on icy roads.
4. Brew a good pot of coffee.
5. Fold laundry.
6. Tie a tie.

In fact…I think everyone should know these things, not just us guys. You know why? Because, lets face it, women look fantastic in ties. That being said, people should know how to tie a tie.

I first seriously contemplated my lack of tie tying knowledge when a photographer friend of mine (dressed-to-the-nines in a fashionable grey suit) helped put on a political debate between two senatorial candidates. Needless to say he looked great but was having serious tie trouble. In the end, a female friend of his fixed him up.

What: This event ultimately led me to discover the not-so-secret art of tying a tie. I did so here: Tie-a-Tie.net.

Who: Caspar Isemer.

When: The site was begun in 2003 and has been helping people know what they heck to do with a tie ever since.

Where: In case you missed it the first time: Tie-a-Tie.net.

Why: Because every fashionable person should know how to tie a tie. Ties look good which means they can help you look better. Besides, our state’s (Alaska) late great former senator Ted Stevens went to Congress in a Hulk tie.

If Stevens did it, it must be alright.

And a Woman’s Bow 

We live in such a casual, laid-back town in the middle of the desert, that we rarely see anyone with a tie. The mode of dress here is shorts, flip-flops or sandals, and well, that’s how everyone dresses for almost everything! That style is even seen at weddings and funerals. 

from Clipart.com

However, if you live where the dress is a little more formal at least once in a while, it’s very romantic and enduring for the woman to be able to tie a man’s tie. It’s hard to imagine now, but I used to have blouses or dresses that would have long sashes that needed to be tied into a bow. Jack was always best at tying these for me. So, we dressed each other.

To picture this now almost seems like it came from a love scene in a movie, but that’s how we used to do it—back when the mode of dress was more than pull-on shorts and flip-flops for shoes.

              (Please leave a comment. We’d love to hear your opinion!) 

~ Glenda (gj)

• www.GlendaSchoonmaker.com
• www.WhatWordsDoYouWear.com
• www.BoogsPuddifer.com

WordPress has a new feature called “Slideshow” that suits perfectly a sequence of photos I took over the weekend of one of those timeless moments that dads and sons have every day when lessons for living are being imparted.  This lesson had to do with tying a tie.  They were just about to go to Easter services and Benjamin’s tie needed a little adjustment.

One of the reasons I love to visit my niece and her husband is to watch how they parent their two boys.  Sometimes I have tears in my eyes wishing her father, my late brother, could see what I am seeing through the lens.

©Pat Coakley 2010

PHOTOGRAPHS CANNOT BE USED WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION

**Select photographs from this blog and my wider archive can be purchased at www.patcoakley.com

I love my SLR, but my Coolpix is fun.  I carry it in my purse all of the time so I can take a photo whenever I want.  The image clarity isn’t always as good, but who cares?  I’m not printing magazines or posters over here.

He’s still hotter in jeans and a t-shirt, but he looked suave at the wedding.

Caleb, our soloist, needed help tying his tie.

Click for larger photo.

This picture simply kills me;  brings me right down to my Mommy knees. I walked in on Danny getting ready for the Junior Prom and this moment took my breath away. He rolled his teenaged eyes at me as I began clicking, but it mattered not. I am pretty sure he gets it under all the bravado. 

This was a week of milestones. Ones that he simply glided through while my heart both swelled and ached. 

A friend I have carpooled with since the boys were in pre-school called me the other day and shared a moment that summed it all up. 

She said she was driving him to hebrew school for the last time, which ended this week with a Confirmation service. She looked in her rearview mirror at the young man with the hairly legs and deep voice who needed a shave. She could not help but think of the little boy with the blonde bowl haircut that she used to lift out of the car seat so many years ago.

Hey, they grow up! Back when they were little, there were those days I thought would never end. Having grown kids was not something I could fathom.

Now I turn around and think, “Hey, who is that man?”

Haven’t had enough of me yet? You can also read me at 50-Something Moms Blog. For photo enthusiasts, visit Leaving the zip code, photos from outside the comfort zone

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How to Tie a Tie Video is available at Amazon for $19.95. To Order click here
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Other Products of Interest

• Neckties How to Tie a Tie by Necktie Accessories yellow hard cover books
• How to Tie a Tie: Choosing, Coordinating, and Knotting Your Neckwear
• Details Men’s Style Manual: The Ultimate Guide for Making Your Clothes Work for You
• A Well-Dressed Gentleman’s Pocket Guide
• AskMen.com Presents The Style Bible: The 11 Rules for Building a Complete and Timeless Wardrobe