The biggest day in the College Football offseason was today, and in honor we bring you a special balls-to- the-wall, orgy-inducing, NATIONAL SIGNING DAY CUP O’ MEAD. Both Neil and I present the day that was for our respective universities, with the same brazen and totally meaningless predictions you have come to love.

WAIT! DON TIBBLES WORKS FOR RIVALS?

All week fans all around the country have hunkered around their computers late into the night, hoping for some “insider” information on their favorite recruits,  and praying that their schools would land a Dean Portman type. This may seem innocent, but to those familiar with the year round process, it is anything but. It actually gets a little creepy. Over at The Mainboard, Rivals, and other recruiting websites, message boards are filled with grown men stalking high school seniors on Facebook, and posting the latest info they got from “This dude I worked with in college who follows Seantrel Henderson’s junior-year girlfriend on Twitter”. I myself have fallen into this depravity. Last night I spent a good 45 minutes watching USCw commit, and Georgia’s favorite wordsmith of a wide receiver, Markeith Ambles (Go Trogans!) talk into his webcam. Ambles had set up a web stream to talk about his recruiting process, and I was among the 650+ viewers. Of course, like any other blurry webcam video from a 17 year old, it was a huge letdown (Principle Rooney strokes his moustache in agreement). Basically he just sat there checking out his hair, answering about 500 phone calls, and GIVIN A BIG SHOUT OUT TO MA BOI RICK UP IN THAT TENNESSEE!

Markeith Ambles, a man of refined tastes...AND GOIN BONE TO BONE

So as disgusted and/or perplexed as you may be by our weirdo antics and general lack of “lives”, Neil and I pride ourselves on getting to know all these kids the best we can before they sign their letters of intent, and enjoy making bold predictions about future players. I will however admit that it gets a little redundant. How many times can one read “Boy’s gonna be a stud. Has all the physical tools to compete at the next level “and “We picked up a big commit today, in all senses of the word”? HARHARHAR, oh wait, excuse me while I shank myself in the eyeballs. Anyway, NSD2010 for UA and UGA lacked some of the drama from last year, and there wasn’t anything near as newsworthy as Dre “Count Swaggula” Kirkpatrick’s gem of an interview, but a lot did happen, and we’re here to tell you about it.

First up, Neil’s thoughts on UGA’s 2010 recruiting class:

Well slap me stupid and call me Jasper Sanks, National Signing Day has come to an end and it looks like UGA will have it’s first non-top 10 recruiting class since 2001 (unless you follow the ESPN rankings in which case we’re #9). The Dawgs whiffed on a few choice prospects including but not limited to Kadron Boone (LSU), Jeff Whitaker (AU), Telvin Smith (F$U), and Chrisitan Green (F$U) that would’ve really helped the class and the team. 5 Star wideout Da’Rick Rogers decided he would pull a Dwayne Allen and switch his commitment on signing day as he decommitted from UGA and committed to the hicks in K’ville. This move accompanied by 4 star CB Nickell Robey’s decision to change his commitment from UGA to USCw early Wednesday morning accounted for Georgia’s quick drop in the recruiting rankings.

The day was not a total loss for the Dawgs, as they added the signatures of 4 star Stephenson (Stone Mountain, GA) DT Mike Thornton and 2 star Wilcox County WR Ronnie Outlaw. Thornton was the 10th best prospect in the state and was a very important piece of the puzzle, as the Dawgs lose 3 DTs to the NFL this year. Thornton and fellow DT commit Garrison Smith (7th overall GA prospect) will be looking to make a big impact in new Defensive Coordinator Todd Grantham’s 3-4 set as freshmen next fall. I know what you’re all thinking, other than the fact his name is Outlaw why would UGA sign a 2 star WR? Well for starters Outlaw’s size speaks for itself, at 6′7″ and 200 lbs. he has ridiculous potential to beef up and win every jump ball thrown his way. He will have to go to Georgia Military College for a year to improve academically, which is probably a reason he was ranked so low. He is also the cousin and good friend of 2011 prospect Nick Marshall of Wilcox County, so it looks like Coach Richt and Coach Bobo have their sights set on this potential 5 star dual threat QB for next year’s class. These two welcome additions rounded out UGA’s 2010 class at 19 signees.

TJ Stripling, in all his Men's Wearhouse Glory

The 2010 class may have stumbled a bit into the finish but that doesn’t mean that it lacks talent. UGA managed to get 4 of the top 10 prospects from the state of Georgia to come to Athens and 9 of the top 50. Combine that with 4 recruits from Florida and 1 from South Carolina and the class stacks up quite nicely. Some names to remember from this class are S/LB Alec “Tree” Ogletree (a huge safety who reminds many of Thomas Davis), DE/LB T.J. Stripling (6′6″ BEAST), RB Ken Malcome (6′0″ 213 lb. Ingram-esque bruiser), S Jakar “Hitman” Hamilton (early enrollee, may start immediately), and OT Brent Benedict (when healthy, he’s as good as another Stinchcomb).

Hitman and Tree...the future of UGA's secondary

Overall the Dawgs filled the spots we needed to. Sure we missed on the #1 prospect in the state in Da’Rick Rogers, but if nothing else it’s karma for taking the top 2 prospects from the state of Tennessee a year ago (Marlon Brown & Austin Long). Many will degrade this class as sub-par. Well guess what? That’s what happens when you go 8-5. Anything less than 10 wins next year is unacceptable. Look for Redshirt Frosh Aaron Murray to line up behind a stacked O-line surrounded by tons of talent and the new-look 3-4 Grantham D to take names and kick ass. A lot to like about the 2010 Bulldogs, even with a lackluster recruiting class. Stay tuned to WBPT for tons of Georgia Football Hype.

Neil McFadden

Good stuff per usual from the man in Red and Black. And now, my look into Bama’s latest haul:

Well folks, business as usual for Overlord Saban and his cast of blood thirsty Basilisks. Even after two consecutive #1 recruiting classes, 2 SEC West titles, and a National Goddamn Championship, Bama had some holes to fill. This is due in large part to the departure of numerous seniors as well as Rolo and Kareem Jackson as juniors. Bama finished with the #5 recruiting class per Rivals.com, getting a great boost in the trenches and a hell of a lot of speed, which will hopefully allow us to continue our transition from an all-out physical running team, to a more balanced attack with more options to open things up.

Before I go into analyzing my favorite standouts from this class, the controversy surrounding 5-star defensive back Keenan Allen must be discussed. Allen had been committed to Bama for sometime, before shit just got crazy this week. Apparently Allen wanted to play with his half-brother Zach Maynard, former Buffalo QB who left after Turner Gil signed up to coach Kansas, and their mother seemed to be pulling the strings towards the home stretch. Needless to say, the rumors began flying around.  So Saban didn’t want to offer Maynard a scholly just to land the big fish, that maybe he did offer, then maybe Keenan really did want to go to Clemson, or was it Cal? Really just a big bumfuck. Then the truth came out. Keenan was working with a handler/pimp/shady motherfucker (remember Arthur and Bryce Brown?) by the name of Otis Yelverton. Now the details are sketchy, but it seems Saban may have stopped any efforts to get Allen if he had to deal with ole Otis, and I don’t blame him. One player isn’t worth the possible investigations and shady back room dealings. Congrats to Cal for pulling in a true playmaker, and moreover, congrats to Allen’s mom, whom should be enjoying her new home and Range Rover any day now.

Otis Yelverton. Don't worry, he wasn't a coach at Cal. He just loves exploiting high schoolers and wearing terrific hats.

Man, I’m glad that shit is over, but I had to report it. Anyway, now on to the meat and potatoes. My 4 favorites from the swaggeriffic class of 2010. Oh yeah, click on their names for their highlight videos.

1. My favorite recruit from this year’s class has to be Deion Belue, a 3 star cornerback out of Tuscumbia, and maybe somewhat of a sleeper in this class. In my opinion this guy has a hell of a lot of upside. 6 foot, 175 pounds with a promising frame, and lightning quick. Hopefully Deion can qualify academically, anyone who returns 7 punts for touchdowns IN SEVEN STRAIGHT GAMES is a bonified playmaker/babymaker. Look for him to be our return man sooner than later.

SWAGG rating: Jules Winnfield after a fresh jheri curl.

2. Next up is arguably the best QB in the country for 2010, Chesapeake, Virginia’s Philip Sims. This 4-star was a HUGE pull for Saban and Co. as we pulled one of the nation’s top prospects out of a state we hardly recruit, and gave us a clear recruiting class leader. Sims has a laser arm and at 6-2, 209, great potential to be a formidable force in the coming years. I would expect Sims to take a redshirt this coming year as GMac is coming back, with budding star AJ McCarron backing him up. Sims should benefit tremendously from their tutelage, and I forsee him panning out a hell of a lot better than Star Jackson has. Also, he has the Predator look going, which always means greatness.

SWAGG rating: Al Green’s afro pick

3. 4-star Alfy Hill out of North Carolina (TAKE YA SHIRT OFF!) is a true animal, and I expect big things from this strong-side DE. I love his long huge arms, and moreover, his name. Alfy will most likely play a stand up LB in the 3-4, and I can’t wait to see him wreck havoc off the edge. We needed some pass rushers in this class, and Alfy definitely fits the mold after recording 112 tackles, 15 for a loss, and 12 sacks during his senior year. Also of note, Alfy is the first player that Bama has signed out of NC since the 80’s.

SWAGG rating:

4. This class is full of great choices, and I want to write about all of them (No I don’t), but my final swagg star for tonight is Mobile’s Jalston Fowler. The 4-star fullback, yes fullback, is a true freak of nature. Dude looks like a Spanish bull. Fowler, as well as being a beast-mode running back/fullback in high school, was a serious LB. I expect him to project as an OLB rather than a RB at Bama, especially after he starts a D-1 weight and nutrition program.

SWAGG rating: Ving Rhames before he started doing shitty comedies.

Besides these guys, Bama loaded up almost everywhere. Among the 6 defensive backs we picked up, 5-star DeMarcus Milliner and 4-star John Fulton are the true stars, and the future of our secondary that going into next year will average 6-foot-2 and 200 lbs. 6-7 Brian Volger is a massive TE with mitts reminiscent of Ole Sure Hands Will Oakley (Ok he wasn’t a TE, but he was white,  so fuck you). Add in stud LB C.J. Mosley, who should be a monster once he gets his turn. We also got some solid prospects for the O-line in Arie “I can’t wait til Verne Lundquist tries to pronounce my name” Kouandjio and corn-fed white boys Chad Lindsey and Austin Shepard. Oh, and I almost forgot, we got a punter and a kicker to replace Van Jr. and P.J. All in all, a great class, and a lot to look forward to in the coming years. In Saban’s name we pray.

Ὀδυσσεύς Bombay

In my previous post, I asked what murders my affections for Christ.  There are some things that simply choke out any affections I have for Christ, or desire for holiness, or longing to spend in His word.

As I spent some time dwelling on the question and making my little list, I came to some fairly shocking conclusions.  They shocked me, at any rate.

Because I was raised amongst the fundamentalists, I was expecting a list that was along the lines of: pornography, cocaine…you know, the really big stuff.

But the reality is, if you walked up to me and offered me a bag of really high-quality heroin, I wouldn’t need to make a list:

• Pros: next couple of hours might be really interesting.
• Cons:  Cricket would kill me and my parents and sister would help her hide the body.
• Resultant Conclusion: This is a bad idea.

What I found was that it was the morally neutral stuff that made the list of things that choke out my love for Christ:

1. Watching too much television (not watching any television, but too much, and too much is different for everyone)
2. Following University of Georgia football way too closely (I wind up going to work depressed because we lost, even though I didn’t play)
3. Empty conversations (verbal sparring with people that are only talking to hear their own voice, or talking for hours about absolutely nothing)
4. Physical laziness (I have to get up and move around, take walks, etc., or I get really cranky)
5. Reading too much fiction (this one kills me because I need breaks from all of my other reading, but it has to be in small doses.  My apologies to Mr. King.)

In the last year, both of these lists have changed pretty often, and I think that’s a good thing.  I want to be very aware and keyed in on what feeds my zeal for our great God and King and what kills that zeal.  My hope is that I could flood my life with Christ-exalting, worship-creating things and avoid anything that would rob me of that.

So, in an attempt to make things more interactive, what raises your zeal for Christ and what kills that zeal?  Leave a comment!

Another week, another late Music MANday for all you loyal minions.  With OB coming off his hiatus packed full of post ideas, your boy Neil here has sat idly by and watched with awe and sheer admiration as OB scribbled masterpieces (Late Night Leatherbounds was my favorite) with drink in hand and a healthy disrespect for the status quo (what?). However, all is not lost. I did accomplish a life-long goal last week by wearing sweatpants for 3 straight days without changing. I would like to first thank the weather that covered the area in a constant drizzle, also I would like to thank NCAA football 2010 and my 4 straight number 1 recruiting classes/National Championships for helping me stay focused. I would also like to recognize Chocolate Cheerios as I couldn’t have tackled such a lofty goal without such tasty sustenance.

With the distractions of real-life National Signing Day tomorrow this will be a quick review of a new album from a New York group who describes their sound as Upper West Side Soweto. The man this week is a multi-sport and reality show icon, and he also happens to be a childhood hero of mine. Buckle your seatbelts children. Oh and if you have a pair of sweats now maybe the time to throw them on.

Vampire Weekend exploded on the scene in late 2007/early 2008 when bloggers such as myself and OB kept pumping them as a band everyone should be listening to. Rolling Stone put their tune “Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa” on their best 100 songs of 2007 list and deemed them the “quintessential college band”, whatever the fuck that means. In January 2008 Spin magazine actually put Vampire Weekend on the cover of the mag and proclaimed them the year’s best new band, before the band had even released their debut self-titled album.

The question now is, who is this chick?

The sophomore effort “Contra” from the Columbia Alums was released on January 11 and overall it fails to meet the bar that these 4 guys have set for themselves with their 1st release. That is not necessarily a knock on this album at all, the first album was so epic and had so many good, fresh cuts that it would be hard for anybody to match it in just a year’s time. They do stay true to themselves and their music, the overall tone of the album is like something you would like to listen to with a few close friends on the deck of a house by the water in the summer time. It is relatively upbeat and utilizes a vast arsenal of instruments, especially percussion.  The album lacks the overall diversifying themes that made their 1st release so successful, they seemed to stretch their limits on that album and they take a much safer approach to making music on “Contra”. My favorite tracks are “Horchata” which is the most like “Cape Cod” and “Oxford Comma” from their 1st release (two of my favorite tracks), “Cousins” a quick and raucous tune that utilizes lots of primitive instruments before ending in a catchy refrain, and “Diplomat’s Son” a song that starts like something you would here from an album of remixes and lyrically is the album’s best work. Overall I would say this isn’t an album you should rush out and get immediately, maybe just try and get all the songs off Limewire or something. Definitely worth a listen if you got a minute.

My God a freshman indeed. That is 18 year old super-athlete Herschel Walker and he is this week’s Man Icon.

Get a good look ladies

I can’t even begin to describe how much this particular athlete means to me, it’s a completely different series of posts. Let’s just say my dad’s first gift to his newborn son was an autographed picture of Walker, and that my parents got engaged a little over an hour after he rushed 37 times for 238 yards against Florida in 1980 on his way to a record setting freshman year. After he rushed for 265 yards against Ole Miss in 1981 a reporter asked him how he could possibly carry the ball for so many yards, his answer? “It wasn’t that heavy.”  I could gush on and on about this man’s accomplishments on the gridiron but it is his triumphs in his off the field endeavors that have this hero still in the spotlight 28 years after he won the Heisman Trophy.

Herschel was always a freak athlete, he was an Olympic-quality sprinter in college and was so fast that he had two racing horses named after him. The most amazing thing about this guy is that he has never used weights to work out. He solely relies on his own body to work out, doing thousands of push-ups, sit-ups, and pull-ups every day to stay in shape. He is also a bit of an enigma in that he has a bi-polar type condition that borders on disassociative identity disorder.

Chickin wang

All the while Herschel has been a leader of men, investing in various business ventures after his days in the NFL came to an end. He has put money in everything from a logistics company, to a soda named Hallelujah Cola, to a few choice fried chicken franchises. Herschel came from a large family of 7 children in Wrightsville, GA and has not only supported his parents but has given back to his High School and the community as a whole. He was a reality show TV star on one of the Celebrity Apprentice series’  and went toe-to-toe with Dennis Rodman and told him to his face that “You are a bad person” which I like to believe led to Rodman checking himself into a new reality show, Celebrity Rehab.

This is all well and good, but what separates Herschel Walker from every other freak athlete/Heisman Winner/NFL stud/Reality Star/Fried Chicken connoisseur? Maybe the fact that he is a certified black belt and now, at age 47 he is a professional Mixed Martial Artist. Yeah he’s a pro MMA fighter and recently beat a tested middle weight fighter 21 years his junior by Technical Knock Out in the 3rd Round of his first ever fight. I’ll let the below video speak for itself. I could go on and on on this guy. But it’s getting late and OB will be pissed if I don’t finish this pretty soon. So Herschel we here at WBPT salute you sir, your physical prowess as the perfect human specimen will always be acknowledged on this site and hopefully many others.

Neil McFadden

Determined to go out making even more noise than when he arrived, Lane Kiffin’s last night in Knoxville began when he told his players he would be headed out West. This NY Times Article claims they weren’t too happy.

“Coach Kiffin recruited me, Ed Orgeron came in my living room and recruited me, and now they’re gone,” said Robert Nelson, a redshirt freshman from Stone Mountain, Ga. “I don’t know what I’m doing yet, whether I stay. I need to see what the older guys are going to do. There are a lot of guys who are not sure if they are staying after this mishap.

“Guys were really angry at him last night, really angry.”

After breaking the news to his players, Kiffin made his way to some sort of UT media room, where he forced the press to obey his first wish as a man free from the stifling confines of Knoxville.

Do not question “Left Coast” Lane. He is Hollywood now.

Before he arrived at the presser, a UT rep made reporters aware of Mr. Kiffin’s odd TV/print demands, after which this spirited exchange took place -

Click to watch the pre-presser reporter mêlée.

Notice how the angry asshole in the sweater vest handles his stack of papers like it is a butterfly knife ready to bury deep into journalist flesh.

The pre-presser seems on par with watching the 6 tape, VHS box set of ‘Lonesome Dove’ compared to Lane’s one and a half-minute press conference.

The reason he was so anxious to get out of there seems to have had something to do with the angry mob that was gathering outside.

Kiffin needed a police escort out of town, and angry UT students proceeded to “riot”, torching Kiffin T-Shirts and a mattress.

Even in the midst of the bedlam, Ed Orgeron managed to put in some work for USC while he was still present on Rocky Top. The Trojans are getting their money’s worth with Ed – no one in the business can apply their trade quite like “The Ogre”, as shown in this last video.

Yes indeed, exciting night in Knoxville.

Watching UT students whipped into a berserker rage and Rocky Top descending into anarchy gave me a great deal of pleasure – until Derek Dooley decided to play mister buzzkill.

It’s sacrilege I tell you…

After arriving at UT, Lane Kiffin immediately began a pattern of unscrupulous behavior, starting with a verbal salvo fired across the bow of Meyer and the Gators.

Besides a bad case of diarrhea of the mouth, Kiffin also worked his craft of recruiting sleaziness the way other artists do clay sculpture or oil paint on canvas.

The degree of Kiffin’s douchebaggery was as plain as the nose on every Vol fans face. It was impossible to ignore – there was almost one controversial comment or incident per week since he came tripping over his tongue into Knoxville.

One would think that Kiffin’s actions would be abhorred by fans of the tradition-rich program of Tennessee, a team whose stadium is named for a war hero. Instead, not only were Kiffin’s antics permitted, they were encouraged and embraced.

Volunteer fans delighted in every instance that Kiffin opened his mouth and spewed his venomous rhetoric, claiming all the while he was “energizing the program”, and that those who complained were only doing so because deep down they “feared” the inevitable return to glory of UT football.

Al Davis’ warning that Kiffin was scumbag went ignored, just like Kiffy’s repeated transgressions as the Vol’s head coach. As long as Kiffin was dressed in Orange, the Vols could have cared less how he acted.

Now that their chickens have come home to roost, Vol fans have taken to the web to air their grievances about their former savior, bitching and moaning on message boards and YouTube and expecting some sort of condolences from the rest of the SEC.

Should we feel sorry for them? Hell no.

Many moons ago, a wise old drunkard told me the following tale one evening over some heartache and cheap bourbon. The subject matter was not related to football, but still, I find this yarn to be the perfect analogy for how the rest of the college football world should feel about the Vols current predicament:

A man is walking  into a bar on a cold winter evening. Outside the bar he sees a rattlesnake.

The rattlesnake says to the man:

“Hey pal, it’s cold. How about picking me up and stuffing me into your coat?”

The man replies:

“Hell no. You are a rattlesnake. You will bite me.”

“Please!” says the snake “I promise I won’t bite you.”

“Sorry pal.” says the man, as he strolls into the bar.

After having a few drinks, the man decides to leave the bar. On his way out, he sees the snake again, coiled up and shivering in the parking lot.

“Hey buddy! Pick me up and put me in your coat! It’s so cold out here! I’m freezing!” says the snake.

This time, slightly buzzed, the man begins to feel sympathy for the snake. He reaches down, picks it up and stuffs it into his jacket, at which time the snake promptly bites him.

“You bit me!” The man exclaimed.

To which the rattlesnake replied:

“You knew what I was when you picked me up…”

Even though I know I shouldn’t feel pity for our enemies to the north, my humanity got the better of me last night when I made the following video:

The song is from The Chris Vernon Show, FOX Sports Radio, AM 730, Memphis Tennessee. Great stuff as usual from Chris.

CLICK HERE to download the ‘Runaway Lane’ MP3

Right now I am hearing reports of students “rioting” on the UT Campus in response to Kiffin’s move to USC, but from the looks of this video recently posted on YouTube it appears to be little more than teenagers running through the streets while smiling and laughing.

Kiffin is now on his way to Southern Cal, where they know how to riot RIGHT dammit! They don’t just run through the streets like the last day of 6th grade – they break and burn stuff.

Now Vols, for your pleasure, I present  BigVOLdaddy -

This Vol fan knows how to properly express his displeasure with Kiffin through copious amounts rage and venom (AKA: urine and lighter fluid)!

There would be no shop window left unbroken or police cruiser left unturned if this man was roaming the streets of Knoxville.

“It’s time.”

Looks like UGA has swung and missed on Kirby Smart, getting yet another top Defensive Coordinator a hefty raise. But hey cheer up Dawg fans, at least Richt is good for the economy:

http://blogs.ajc.com/mark-bradley-blog/2010/01/12/richts-stimulus-package-say-no-to-uga-and-get-rich/?cxntfid=blogs_mark_bradley_blog

Neil McFadden

This public service announcement is brought to you by Georgia Tech’s Department of Stereotype Continuation.

4 Tickets. 4 Hot Dogs. 4 Cokes. A tradition of football excellence.

Thanks for 3 great years of head bustin'!

LINK To The Athens Banner Herald Article

Hate to see you go man. You will be missed.

Here’s some video of Rennie right out of high school, before he arrived on the Athens campus.

Observe the freakishness.

The following is a segment from ESPN that aired before the disastrous Alabama game in 2008…

I don’t watch much NFL, but I would wager that whoever gets him will get their money’s worth. Loved watching this kid play.

Best of luck to ya’ Rennie – you were a Damn Good Dawg.

Here we see Alabama Coach Nick Saban trout fishing on scenic Lake Burton.

Nestled in the the breathtaking mountains of Northeast Georgia, Lake Burton provides the finest raw sewage fishing that 4 million per year can afford.

Nick spends his time here in the off season, roughing it in a home so large that he has been forced to bus in a legion of orange-skinned, indigenous people, roughly the same height as himself, to care for the sprawling property.

The workers are rarely seen. No one goes in. No one comes out.

Coach Saban relaxing at his second home on Lake Burton, Georgia.

I wasn’t too confident UGA was going to land Kirby Smart as their new defensive coordinator, but after reading these comments made by Saban after the Tide’s National Championship, I’m almost certain Smart to UGA is a done deal and will be formally announced tomorrow.

St. Nick stated:

“I’m always happy and interested for our coaches to be able to advance professionally, especially if it is a professional advancement in terms of a guy being a coordinator who can go be a head coach in a situation where he has a chance to be successful. . . .

“I’m not pleased when guys make lateral moves because it’s a little bit human nature to think, like my dad used to say, the grass is always greener on top of the septic tank. You always think it’s better someplace else. You kind of let your ego get involved, and you make moves that you shouldn’t make and really aren’t in your best interests for a career standpoint. So I’m not happy when guys do that. But anybody on our staff who can move up, we would like to help them do that.”

I wonder if Nick considers his move from the Dolphins to Alabama a “lateral move”?

Your ego has sold you out again Nick…

Kirby Smart will be named the new defensive coordinator at UGA on Monday, January 11th, 2009.

Manbearpig will not be pleased…

Former Auburn HC Tommy Tuberville will be the next HC at Texas Tech University. The news comes after TTU kicked Mike Leach and his sad pirate fetish to the curb last week. Tuberville was HC at Auburn for 10 years after he left Ole Miss, he led the Tigers to a 13-0 season in 2004. Auburn paid Tuberville to resign in December of 2008. This marks a return to the state of Texas for Tommy Tuberville, he was the DC at Texas A&M under RC Slocum in 1994.

everything's bigger in Texas

TTU also interviewed Kirby Smart for the position yesterday after the MNC game in Pasadena, and it is now widely held that this ensures the Alabama DC will be in Athens next year holding the same title. Attorneys for Smart have been seen in Athens and a plane belonging to the University of Alabama flew yesterday from Pasadena to DeKalb, GA before returning to Tuscaloosa. While some Bama fans hold that KS is in GA simply for recruiting purposes, grumblings from some Bama players that Smart will not return coupled with the hiring of Tuberville in Lubbock lead most to the logical conclusion. Kirby is coming home. Obviously more to come on this. Stay tuned.

With the College Football Season officially over and the Tide crowned National Champs (congrats to OB and all the Tide Nation, knew my open letter would help) it is time to wind up the Coaching Carousel and hold on tight. The first big rumblings are coming just up the road from the site of last night’s MNC game as sources have reported USC HC Pete Carroll is leaving the Trojans to try his hand in the NFL, again, with the Seattle Seahawks. The contract is said to be a done deal and in the neighborhood of 5 yrs for $75 million. USC’s Number 9 ranked recruiting class will obviously take a hit and we will keep you posted here as I’m sure Bama & UGA go after a few kids in the mix.  This makes me smile for a few reasons, the first is that I hate USC and was elated when they did so poorly this year, the second is that this seems to indicate that the NCAA investigation into USC’s treatment (payment & bribery) of their athletes is coming to a head.

I'm so paid man

In other Coaching News, it appears that there are 3 final candidates for the UGA Defensive Coordinator position. The finalists are Kirby Smart, Todd Grantham and Will Muschamp. Yes Bama DC Kirby is still in play, in fact it is thought that he actually has an offer in hand that is his to turn down (if this is the case, why haven’t we heard anything from Tuscaloosa?). If KS were to turn down UGA’s offer Mark Richt would then turn to Dallas Cowboy’s DL Coach Todd Grantham to lead the Dawgs D in 2010, it is also widely believed that Grantham also has an offer and will accept if KS turns his down. The real shocker here is Will Muschamp, a UGA Alum and current Texas DC and Head Coach-in-Waiting. His name has been thrown into the mix and it appears he may be interested in leaving his cushy deal at UT (but I wouldn’t count on it, although Mack Brown did just sign a hefty extension. Just sayin…) to come to Athens. I don’t know about you Dawgnation but I would gladly pay what UT is paying to match Muschamp’s exact deal, HCIW and all. It’s no secret the Dawgs have been after Kirby since even before Willie Martinez was fired, but no clear statement has been made on his behalf and he will continue to be a leading candidate until UGA announces that it is someone else or Kirby announces he is staying put (or going to be the next HC at Texas Tech). The man is so fluent in Coach-speak nobody has any idea what’s going on. Basically, UGA can’t go wrong with any of these candidates, they would all be great hires and I’m looking forward to a press conference on Monday. I hope. But that’s just my 2 cents. As always we will confirm when things are official, and take this FWIW.

The man looks good in black, just sayin...

Neil McFadden

In the 1950’s, a secret project was undertaken by the University of Georgia’s biochemistry lab.

Now, in 2010, the results can finally be revealed. General George S. Patton has been successfully cloned and will serve as a motivational speaker for the 2010 UGA football season.

Here he opines on the Florida situation.

It’s the off season now for UGA, so I will be posting so many “FLASHBACK” segments that it may appear all those years of LSD use might be catching up to me.

Remember when, in 2007, Gator fans kept bring up the subject of “class” after the impromptu Georgia dance party following Knowshon Moreno’s touchdown dive?

Well, Dawg fans of a less recent vintage were quick to point out the notorious “Gator Flop” of 1971 in response.

Up until last summer, the only evidence of the most bush league stunt in the history of college football had remained the two grainy, black and white photo’s posted below:

Then, out of nowhere, a youtube user by the name of wolfsonarchive uploaded actual color footage of this dastardly incident.

Believe me, after watching this, the black and white photos and stories passed around on the message boards pale in comparison.

Behold in living color as the entire Gator defense LAYS DOWN, letting Miami score a touchdown in the games final minutes, thereby allowing Florida quarterback John Reaves (Lane Kiffin’s father in law – WTF?) to get back into the game and break Jim Plunkett’s NCAA passing record.

The moral of this story? Don’t EVER let a Gator fan attempt to give you some lecture on the subject of class.

You will run laps or I will remove your spinal cord!!!

Reports out of Athens are beginning to surface that Mark Richt has hired Manbearpig as UGA’s new defensive coordinator to replace fired DC Willie Martinez.

Manbearpig has a reputation for being a strict disciplinarian, and reports of his hire have already caused one big name recruit to flee – 4 star defensive end B.J. Butler of Kissimee Florida has jumped ship and will reportedly sign with Louisville and new head coach Charlie Strong.

“I am committed to Georgia, but I am not really feeling them lately. I’ve been talking to (new Louisville coach) Charlie Strong lately and I’m going to go ahead and go to Louisville,” Butler said in an interview on Dec. 27.

Butler added: “Besides, I didn’t commit to Georgia to play for no Manbearpig.”

If the reports are true, and Richt has signed Manbearpig to a multi-year contract, then I have to say I am definitely pleased by this hire. Manbearpig (half man, half bear, half pig) could bring a fire to the UGA defense not seen since the days of Erk Russell.

Good things lie ahead if this deal can be confirmed. I am quite excited by this bold move by Richt.

Go Dawgs!

Thought I would post this video since the Dawgs only manage to accomplish this rare feat once every 6.67 years.

Yes, it’s The World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party, circa 1997.

Yes, that is our current offensive coordinator playing quarterback and one of our defensive coordinator candidates playing safety.

Man, time really flies. Seems like only yesterday I was down in Banks County drinking cheap swill and not believing what my eyes were witnessing. I thought we may have actually turned the corner that year, much the same way I felt in 2007.

But alas, it was not meant to be. Not yet anyway. The time to strike is NOW. They are going to slump next year. Florida dropped to 95th in the nation in red zone offense after Mullen bolted for MSU. Charlie Strong is going on to fail as the head coach at Louisville, Tebow is about to be raptured away in the 5th round of the NFL Draft, and Urban Meyer is fake retiring and developing a taste for zombie sleep drug Ambien.

Time to kick these nasty road lizards while they are down…

First off, Happy 2010! It’s great to be alive, even though I’m battling to adapt to the fact that I’m in my mid twenties. I feel like this guy, minus the crippling (awesome) opium addiction.

"Hey assholes, I fucked Imperial Consort Jin too"

Today during the BCS Championship news conferences, Alabama DC Kirby Smart gave his first extensive interview since last years Sugar Bowl. Since Saban’s assistant minions are relegated to blood-soaked depravation chambers during regular season interview sessions, this week’s slew of pressers has allowed us all to get a better idea of who, aside from our dark lord, runs this football conglomerate. Most importantly, Smart referenced his excitement for 2010, “It’s been great having these players and doing this, and I’m looking forward to it next year.” Smart’s words should make UGA administrators (and Neil) cringe, but don’t expect them to back down. UGA will most likely make a big-time offer for Smart in the very near future, maybe even as early as this week, but from what I have been reading, and the eerie way Smart has begun to talk like Saban during this week’s interviews, I fully expect him to be back for 2010. UGA reportedly offered LSU’s John Chavis around 600k, which he turned down, so a similar number will surely be thrown at Smart. Pretty amazing stuff for Smart considering he used to make $10,000 a year at Valdosta State not too long ago.

Now I haven’t been paying too much attention to what UGA has been doing behind the scenes lately, what with my University playing for the National Fuckin’ Championship, but I’m sure we will hear some big news fairly soon. I just hope it’s this guy…again.

Is BVG worth a Mil?

In other news, Bama strength and conditioning Coach Scott Cochran says “GET VACCINATED YOU SUMBITCH MOTHACOCK! YEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHHH!” (Courtesy of estranged recruiting liaison The Edge)

Ὀδυσσεύς Bombay

I’ll just come out and say it – I am not too proud of ending our season in the Weedeater Bowl (AKA: The Independence Bowl).

UGA was blessed with being the last SEC team to ever play in this bowl, as next year teams from the Mountain West and ACC will get the honor of playing in this “historic and prestigious” bowl game.

I really shouldn’t knock it too much. At times I was worried about us ending up over .500 this year. I guess after 9 years under Mark Richt I have become somewhat spoiled.

If you think about it, UGA was a few plays away from going either 10-3 (UK, LSU) or 6-6 (ASU, SCAR) so you can take our final 8-5 record with the proverbial grain of salt.

They say Shreveport isn’t too bad a town, but after reading this article from the Sporting News’ Spencer Hall (EDSBS’ Orson Swindle) a few years back I doubt I will ever dare to venture there. Hall makes it sound like an apocalyptic wasteland where hyenas roam the streets, ready to snatch your child out of your loving arms and turn them into a tasty snack.

Anyway, my youtube pal knowlimitsoulja has compiled an excellent highlight reel from the game.

I was actually very worried about this game before it even got underway, and even more so after nearly 2 quarters of play. I was pretty impressed with former UGA defensive coordinator Joe Kines game plan until our special teams finally tipped the scales in our favor.

Although we were out gained overall in terms of yardage, UGA held one of the Big 12’s better offenses to only 20 points and managed to keep A&M’s much hyped QB under pressure for most of the evening.

Anyway, not a bad way to end the year, in spite of the stigma that goes along with playing in Shreveport. So far, I have yet to hear any reports of hyenas stealing away children into their gaping jaws, so I’m assuming all the Dawg fans made out of “The Gran-daddy of All Bad Bowl Games” alive.

Go Dawgs!

Recently, the online Dawg community suffered a great loss.

UGAMUMMRA, possibly the premiere Georgia highlight reel producer on the web was perma-banned from that free speech bashing, fair use ignoring, haven for fascist a$$holes – YouTube.

UGAMUMMRA – you will be missed. If you happen to come across this post, please feel free to contact me. I will gladly set you up with another account and school you in the finer points of YouTube guerrilla warfare tactics. You are far too talented to suffer the wrath of the YouTube ban hammer.

ugamummra - gone, but not forgotten.

Was it the constant harassment from his arch nemesis Lane Kiffin? The Gator arrests? The heavy fine for trashing SEC refs? The “stress” of getting paid millions to run one of the nations top programs? The mass exodus of coordinators?

I think not…

The reason for Meyer’s abrupt (and obviously rushed) retirement can be summed up with the following video:

All joking aside, DDA has obtained an exclusive transcript of the conversation between Urban Meyer and UF Athletic Director Jeremy Foley that exposes Meyer’s premature ejaculation of a “retirement”…

Jeremy Foley: What’s up Urbs? Come on in, have a seat.

Urban Meyer: Thanks for having me here Mr. Foley. What seems to be the problem?

Jeremy Foley: Well, since we lost to SECCG and Tebow will be leaving next season, I am worried about Florida losing some of the media limelight. Any ideas?

Urban Meyer: Well, I could fake my retirement – that would cause a media uproar and get lots of attention.

Jeremy Foley: I can see it now – tribute videos! Tears! The entire Gator Nation up in arms and national excitement surrounding our program again! Sounds great! Run with it.

Urban Meyer: But won’t I look like some sort of drama queen after I announce I was “only kidding”?

Jeremy Foley: Forget about it. We like this sort of attention here at Florida. The thought of the media ignoring us for more than two seconds is worth this calculated risk. Just blame it on the “stress”. It’s been a rough year for you with Tebow leaving, Bama taking our crown and Heisman Trophy, the fine for trashing the refs, the arrests, all the expectations of going undefeated – it’s more than most men could bare.

Urban Meyer: But I get paid millions of dollars to deal with that kind of stuff.

Jeremy Foley: Not another word! You are fake retiring and that’s the end of it! We can just get Addazio to run the ship for a year while we stare down over his shoulder and criticize his every move. If we don’t live up to expectations, we can just scapegoat him. It will give me and you plenty of time for golf too – have you played that new Nicklaus course outside of town?

Urban Meyer: Not yet. But what about Lane Kiffin? Now he is going to make fun of me.

Jeremy Foley: Don’t you worry about him Urbs – I made a few calls to the NCAA about some of his recruiting activities, so that should keep him in line for a season or two until you make your triumphant return. I can see it now – weeks of non-stop coverage on ESPN next season when you come back from retirement to once again lead the Gators to the promised land! It’ll be epic! Vern Lundquist may actually keel over with excitement!

Urban Meyer: I’m not so sure about this Mister Fol-

Jeremy Foley: Enough with the negative vibes Urbs! Go grab your sticks! I’m making us a tee time!

The evidence is piling up that the new Defensive Coordinator for the University of Georgia football team will be current LSU DC John Chavis. This is Chavis’s first year with the Bayou Bengals after being at Tennessee for the previous 14 years under Phil Fulmer.  The Bulldogs have reportedly put together a 3 year, $1.8 million package to get Chavis back to the SEC East. The move may be a reaction to Chavis’s apparent disdain with how LSU Coach Les Miles runs practices as well as a logistical issue with the business his wife owns and runs in Knoxville (aka Buttholeville). It is also reported that Miles will meet with Chavis today to put together a counter-offer so nothing is set in stone (although I believe he has decided to come to Athens regardless of Miles’s offer).

John "The Chief" Chavis

Born in Dillon, SC John Chavis began his coaching career at Tennessee as a Graduate Assistant in 1979, he was then an Assistant for Alabama A&M from ‘80-’83.  He returned to UTk  as an assistant in 1989 after stints at Alabama State and Alabama A&M as their DC. He was promoted to DC at UTk in 1995 and along with Bob Stoops (Florida DC at the time) is credited with bringing the Zone Blitz to College Football. UTk won a national title in 1998 and that same year Chavis was named the SEC’s outstanding linebackers coach. He was named Assistant Football Coach of the Year following the 2006 season by the American Football Coaches Association. Fans of the puke-orange in Buttholeville criticized his defenses of being too soft on 3rd and long situations (Willie Martinez flashbacks), prompting the use of the phrase “3rd and Chavis” His defense however, still managed to rank in the top 3 SEC defenses 5 of his last 7 years at UTk.

Nothing final on this obviously, and I’m not expecting an official announcement until sometime next week from UGA Head Coach Mark Richt. As far as hires go,  I would rate this a B+. Chavis has turned LSU’s D around this year considerably compared to where they were a year ago. I hate that he’s a UTk guy, but what’re you gonna do? His specialty is linebackers who DESPERATELY need coaching in Athens. He has put some 20+ linebackers in the pros over his career at UTk, and UGA fans remember how good we were in the days of solid LBs like Will Witherspoon, Odell Thurman, Boss Bailey, etc… He also recruited and coached UTk Safety Eric Berry (very scary) and with the quality of talent UGA has coming in 2010 at that position (not to mention if Reshad Jones stays) it could amount to great things. It’s not a homerun, but I believe Chavis can help get us back to the dome and have a shot at a National Title.

Again, wouldn’t put it past CMR for this to all be a distraction a la Bud Foster a few weeks ago. The longer this drags on the more it looks good for Kirby Smart to be the guy (he has been seen at the UGA Athletic Complex in Athens and Bama HC Nick Saban refused to even acknowledge whether or not he had granted CMR permission to speak with Kirby). If UGA has a press conference early next week, look for it to be Chavis. If the National Championship is played and still nothing is heard out of Athens, look for Kirby to come home.

Update 12/31  10:00 am: TigerBait.com has confirmed that John Chavis will remain at LSU despite overtures from Georgia.

Again seems like a DC using the UGA opening to gain some leverage on his financial situation, last week Les Miles confirmed that Marck Richt had not contacted him asking persmission to speak with Chavis, combine that info with this report from TigerBait and you can pretty much rule out Chavis.

I still believe that if there is no announcement made before Jan. 7th Kirby Smart will be back in Athens next year. One rumor I have heard suggests that Kirby will only come to UGA for a Muschamp-like contract. For those that don’t know Will Muschamp is the Texas DC, makes $900k/year and is the “Head Coach In-Waiting”(and is also a UGA alum). I pray that UGA doesn’t give Kirby a “Head Coach In-Waiting” title as he really hasn’t earned it and with Mark Richt being only 49 years young that could spell a lot of drama for quite some time. I’d love to have Kirby, but not for more than say $500k/year.

As for an announcement early next week, I now think the favorite is possibly Todd Grantham who is currently the defensive line coach for the Dallas Cowboys. The NFL regular season concludes on Sunday so if the hire were to come from the league then a press conference early next week would indicate a Pro. Other NFL names I have heard mentioned are Bob Sanders (D-Line coach of Buffalo Bills, spent 11 yrs at UF), Brian VanGorder (Atlanta Falcons DC, UGA DC from 2001-04), and Romeo Crennel (Cleveland Browns HC 2005-08, NE Patriots DC 2001-04). Crennel is currently unemployed so if he was the guy it makes no sense to wait to announce the hire, just a rumor I read while perusing the message boards and thought it was funny.