Now we’re at eleven!

While Tiger Woods continues to hide from the public (and slaps a ban on the British press, as reported recently in The Guardian), the women claiming to have slept with him grow in number. His humiliation is the cash cow ready to be pumped as some of them conduct interviews on TV and in the papers. One of them, Jaimee Grubbs, shows why women can multi task, as it’s claimed she was with George Clooney as well as Tiger at one point and bless her, she made an apology to Elin Nordegren on NBC for the pain she may had caused. I’m sure Elin felt much better for knowing that.

Mrs Woods has decided to stay with him, for the sake of the children, a very common decision taken in a situation like this. But even with the mountain of conditions she will have laid down in order for her to not walk out and start divorce proceedings, it’s difficult to see, on the face of it, how this marriage will survive as more of these women appear. At least Elin is standing by her man, which is more than can be said for that fickle mistress called the commercial world. The endorsements and sponsorships are now starting to fall. He hasn’t made an appearance on US TV commercial breaks since the end of November when this whole sorry affair first kicked off and brands like Gillette, Nike, Tag Heuer, Accenture and AT&T are watching carefully to see how much damage will be caused to their brands by this scandal.

As I said in my previous post (by the way, I didn’t think I’d be writing about this again), I still believe in time he’ll come out of the other side, better than ever and deeply chastened. Most of us experience a seismic event, which pull us up short and make us realise we need to ‘fix up.’ If, on the other hand, when the dust finally settles, everything dries up, or he decides to quit the game, he could always move into football management. He’s already got his first eleven.

Following the success of the album of the decade debate, we’re now on to the advert of the decade.  Follow it on Twitter with the hashtag #adofthedecade.

I don’t really watch an awful lot of television, so perhaps I’m poorly qualified to write this post.  I certainly couldn’t blog about TV, like Curtinho does in his excellent treatise on the coming and goings of US shows.

I watch the news, sport, current affairs shows, and enough of Corrie and Eastenders to keep abreast of what is going on (always an easy way to make conversation with the grandparents if other topics get exhausted). 

I generally use ad breaks as an opportunity to nip to the loo, make a cuppa, or channel-hop.  Even so, there are plenty of adverts which have permeated my consciousness over the 21 years of my life so far. 

The Cadbury’s Caramel bunny was perhaps the first – even now I view her as the Lara Croft of confectionery due to the overly-sexual representation she was given.  Nobody can fail to remember that silky voice.  And if anyone questions the above, just watch the below advert from 1980 (admittedly not in my lifetime, but even then they were laying the crude foundations).

Cadbury’s also had a more recent winner with the gorilla playing a bit of Phil Collins.  Guinness have had some brilliant ads over the years, and I always enjoyed the Kit Kat one with the salmon for its great simplicity and the splendid invocation from Jason Statham: “Remember – you are not a salmon.”

But no advert in the last decade has come anywhere near the singing dog used by Volkswagen Polo.  It has everything; it’s funny, it’s catchy, it’s not over-commercial, and best of all it got up the noses of 286 people who presumably have nothing better to do with their time (do read the story on that link, some of the comments are hilarious – perhaps my favourite criticism is that the dog should have been sat in the back wearing a seatbelt).

So if and when you sit down to evaluate the last decade of your life, remember to be grateful for Volkswagen’s cleverly-trained singing dog.  On three: “I’m a man, yes I am…”

Dave Itzkoff/The New York Times-Art Beat

When CBS had Adam Lambert as a guest on its “Early Show” Wednesday morning, it may have believed it would placate viewers who were upset when Mr. Lambert had his invitation withdrawn by ABC’s “Good Morning America.” Instead, the booking has led to further complaints from those who say Mr. Lambert has been subjected to a double standard. http://www.LesbianSugarLounge.com for more on this on going story.

Amy Molloy/graziadaily.co.uk

Have you seen American Idol Adam Lambert’s oh-so controversial kiss with his male backing singer, during his performance at Sunday’s American Music Awards? No? Well, that’s probably because US channel CBS blurred out the kiss in their coverage of the show. To see the video and add comments http://www.LesbianSugarLounge.com

Gabriel Byrne as Dr Paul Weston

It stars some of Hollywood’s finest actors, including a star turn from the always watchable Gabriel Byrne as therapist Paul Weston, has won a raft of awards in America and comes from the TV powerhouse that is HBO – and now In Treatment has arrived in the UK.

Based on the Israel “telenovela” series Be’Tipul, HBO’s In Treatment is a novelty in a world of reality TV and dumbed down soaps: stripped over five nights of the week, each half-hour episode follows a different patient as they meet with Dr Paul Weston (Gabriel Byrne) for their therapy session, while Friday’s episode sees Weston attend a meeting with his own therapist.

According to series creator Hagai Levi, psychology is a way of life for many Israeli’s, him included.

“I was very religious when I was a child and grew up in an Orthodox Jewish family. I started therapy at a very early age, growing up in a Kibbutz in Israel which pioneered it, and I’ve found it very helpful throughout my life, very natural,” says the softly spoken Levi. “It can be odd and a problem in itself because you’re used to sharing everything with a stranger, but  basically it’s my language.”

To Levi, it seemed natural to develop a TV series focusing on therapy.

“I’ve directed a lot of television and feature films and I found the thing I enjoy most is two people talking, listening and getting involved with them,” notes Levi. “I worked for a few years in the telenovela/soap industry in Israel and hated it but I realised the power of a daily series.”

“I wondered why there couldn’t be a good daily drama rather than a bad one, one that combined my love of conversation and therapy. Everything came together about six years ago when I came up with the concept of Be’Tipul.”

Rather than introduce the viewer to a group of kooks and crazies to be laughed at or ridiculed, In Treatment offers up a cast of characters feeling mental pain or anguish, each one with their own foibles and strengths.

“It was important to show a couple of things about therapy.” agrees Levi. “Firstly, I wanted to show that you don’t have to be crazy to attend and to try to remove the stigma. Secondly I wanted to show that the therapist is a person with desire, anger and a family life, to show that when he’s in front of the patient he’s not a blank wall, but that there’s a relationship there between them.”

Weston is also seen to make mistakes with his patients, misjudging one situation in the first week, resulting in him needing to attend sessions of his own.

“When I realised during planning for the original series that he would go to his therapist on a Friday I knew I had something. By having that session we get to know Paul and basically the show is about him rather than the patients, the hero is the therapist.”

With TV companies looking to sell their shows to as wide an audience as possible, was it difficult to convince broadcaster that such a static show would work?

“It was. It took me about two years to sell it in Israel, though HBO bought the American remake rights immediately. It’s also cheap, which helps. I t was originally meant to be a small, late night show, but then it became huge and everyone watched it in Israel. It actually affected the popularity of therapy there with more people going to it.”

How did the profession react to the series?

Melissa George as Laura

“Psychologists thought it was the first time their work has been presented in the proper way,” says Levi. “Think about the way psychology is presented in films, such as Woody Allen pictures, it’s ridiculous.

“One psychologist told me “Finally my family can see what I’m doing and what I have to cope with!” Now they’re using it in Israel and America in universities to demonstrate therapy to students. They’ve also raised their prices!”

Although HBO used American actors and made changes for the international market, this version still has echoes of the Israeli original, something Levi openly acknowledges.

“The first season is very close to the original, almost word for word in the first few weeks. As the season continues there are more changes and some brand new episodes.

“The second season is much deeper and more adapted to the Western culture. Consider the character of the pilot, Alex (played by Blair Underwood). In Israel being a pilot is second only to God and later on you’ll find out he’s the son of a Holocaust survivor so he’s very much an Israeli character.”

Known for taking chances with their series, HBO seems the natural home for such a unique series -  was there ever any pressure from them to change things?

“When I first came to America everyone told me they wouldn’t let me leave it like it is, that we’d have to open it up and that it couldn’t stay in the room. That wasn’t the case as they let me leave it as it was, very intimate. There was no pressure at all from HBO, perhaps helped by the fact they needed it on the air very quickly.

“There was some more pressure in the second season because we all felt that we wanted to do a better job by making it more American, but I wouldn’t imagine myself working for a network like CBS or NBC, making it more commercial and telling you what to do.”

As well as absorbing storylines, In Treatment boasts a cast list that includes the Oscar-winning Dianne Wiest as Weston’s therapist, ex-Home and Away star Melissa George as sexually obsessed Laura and Bridget Jones’ own Embeth Davidtz as Amy, one half of a married couple in trouble.

“Gabriel and Dianne are well known, the others are perhaps lesser known,” says Levi. “When I came to HBO I told them my Israeli cast were all huge stars and that it was important to bring US stars to the show.

“To hold the viewers’ attention for half an hour you need to have that star quality, be able to look at a close-up and be fascinated all the time. HBO had their arguments that they want to see new faces so you believe it, which is their style, as in The Wire.”

Blair Underwood as Alex

Another element of the series which Levi is proud of is the way it has changed how a TV series can be watched by its audience.

Just as the DVD box set has revolutionised the consumption of a programme, allowing entire seasons to be devoured in a weekend, In Treatment allows further fine tuning to the experience.

“You can watch it every night, watch five episodes at the weekend, watch it online [in America, episodes were added to iTunes by HBO each week, five episodes at a time] or wait for the DVDs,” enthuses Levi.

“You can also pick one character and just follow them. Luckily I was came along at a time when it was important your show was available across many platforms.”

While we’re only just getting the series in the UK, a second has already been screened in America, with Levi hinting that a third, “a kind of spin-off, following one patient through his life”, may enter production soon.

Given the programme’s success in such a crowded TV marketplace, what makes its creator proudest when he looks at back at the first year?

Levi smiles and thinks for a moment: “The fact that, even with all this noise all around them on television, people will listen to two people sitting in a room and talking makes me very happy.”

In Treatment is on Sky Arts 1, Monday to Friday at 10pm, with an Omnibus edition of all five episodes every Sunday at 10pm. Week 2 begins 12 October.

Watch a trailer for In Treatment:

Mad Men is a US TV series that I am mesmerised by: harbouring a gritty aesthetic, ruthless characters and sex appeal that is unparalleled in modern television.  The thrust of the show centres around the company Sterling Cooper, a fictitious advertising agency set in 1960s Manhattan, a hub of prosperity and optimism invoked by post-war growth and the advent of the space race.

The apparent realism is quite startling: the characters are openly sexist, racist, homophobic and quaff whiskey relentlessly.  Even more surprising for a TV drama produced in the last ten years is the smoking on screen: it’s non-stop and unashamed.  I can’t say that I have experienced this decade first hand; I am convinced that this is what it would look like*.

For those new to the show, an overview of the key characters:

• Don Draper – the creative director of Sterling Cooper.  He is ruthless, mildly psychotic, has vision and poise.  He is the man who has everything (including several mistresses) and yet fails to find contentment.  His story serves as a warning to those who pursue success at all cost.
• Pete Campbell – is an account executive.  Young and enthusiastic, Pete lacks the cool or sophistication of Don.  He is undermined by a general lack of respect from his peers, who view him as something of an annoyance.
• Peggy Olson - starts work as a markedly naive and impressionable secretary.  Her talents for copy writing are discovered by chance, and she quickly rises through the ranks, able to assert herself in a fiercely male dominated environment.  Peggy’s story is very much in keeping with the American Dream: how hard work and graft can lead to riches, even in the face of intimidating adversity.  (A cynical part of me wonders how much the plight of this plucky heroine can be attributed to marketeers who need the programme to offer something to female viewers.  Despite this, the programme is far richer for her inclusion).
• Joan Holloway - is office manager, and serves as the bridge between the fully female administration and the frequently leering male staff.  She is first and foremost professional and courteous (as office managers often are), but finds herself embroiled in controversy, not least for an affair with silver haired director Roger Sterling.  It would pain me not to mention that Joan, played by Christina Hendricks is impossibly proportioned and effortlessly seductive.  Phew, got that out of my system…

Mad Men is shown on BBC4 here in blighty, Series 2 having ended in July.  Series 3 is now underway stateside, and should be making an appearance here before Christmas.  If only real life were this alluring.

* For Clio if you’re reading: unusually for me, this is correct usage of a semicolon.

I’ve been watching the US police drama, Life, on ITV3, probably the only programme I’ve ever watched on that channel.  We’re getting towards the end of the second, and final, season of the series, so I thought I’d offer a few thoughts.

Life is the story of Charlie Crews, a cop who was wrongly convicted of murder and imprisoned for 12 years.  After winning his appeal, he is released with a multi-million dollar settlement and a detective’s shield.  He and new partner (and recovering drug and alcohol addict), Dani Reese (Sarah Shahi), investigate homicides, whilst Crews pursues a personal crusade in to the conspiracy that framed him for murder.

It’s essentially a police procedural with a twist.  The central performance, by British actor Damian Lewis, is key to the show, and he gives Crews a distinctive personality, with his love of fresh fruit and his zen-like attitude to life.  Season 1 was certainly more quirky, with Crews being much more odd, and Reese having a much darker side.  They seemed to clean things up for season 2, presumably to boost ratings, significantly with Reese  wearing her hair down for work, when in the first season it was always up.  It sounds trivial, but it was a very telling note on the tone of the show.  That said, it’s remained different enough to keep me watching, as I don’t usually watch straight cop shows.

With the basics out of the way, let’s get down to the thing that obsesses me every time I watch it: Sarah Shahi’s face.  Now, I know that US TV is notorious for casting attractive people, but Shahi is so insanely beautiful that it dominates my viewing experience.  I’m not criticising her performance as she is very good in the role, but I just cannot accept that she could ever end up being a police officer looking that good.  Now that Life has been cancelled, I can only hope that she gets work soon, hopefully in a show about lingerie models.

p.s.

Between writing this post and publishing it I watched the episode Hit Me Baby.  Reese showed up at a crime scene with noticeably straightened hair and more glamorous make up.  She looked like she was going on a night out rather than investigating a murder (she did look very pretty though).  Perhaps the ratings were really flagging at this point, although, mysteriously,  she was only in the episode for about 2 minutes.

There have been so many rumours of a Friends movie over the past few years, but several sources reckon a fresh report today is true - apparently contracts have been signed, writers are on board, and it’s all go for a Summer 2011 release.

Creators David Krane and Marta Kaufmann have reportedly been wooed back to helm the project, and for the first time all six of the Friends themselves have agreed to take part. This of course comes in the wake of the success of ‘Sex And The City’, which pulled in more than $409 million at the worldwide box office.

If this report IS true, it’s going to be very difficult to pull off. ‘Friends’ wasn’t like ‘Sex And The City’ – ‘Friends’ was a sitcom shot in front of a live audience, whereas ‘Sex And The City’ was produced in a movie-like format anyway. A ‘Friends’ film would have no studio audience and would be alot glossier in production, which of course is a massive risk.

It’d be fun though, obviously. ‘Friends’ is still ridiculously watchable, and has been showing at least twice a day on E4 every single day since the show ended five years ago. 

Nowadays David Schwimmer is getting critical acclaim in theatre and as a director, although commercially he’s not set the world on fire; Lisa Kudrow is behind the US version of BBC favourite ‘Who Do You Think You Are?’, Courtney Cox’s new US series has just premiered to more than 10 million viewers and is confirmed for ‘Scream 4′, Jennifer Aniston has had several hits (and a couple of misses) in Hollywood, Matthew Perry was recently the older Zac Efron in ‘17 Again’, and Matt LeBlanc has been out of the limelight since spin-off ‘Joey’ got cancelled.

Presumably some sort of confirmation or denial will emerge in the next day or so. In the meantime, here’s a clip from one of the best episodes ever (the Rachel/Phoebe/Joey scheming when they find out about Monica and Chandler came a close second. “They don’t know we know they know we know!”).

Over on the comments section on excellent TV blog, Unpopcult, a trend has emerged regarding vampire drama True Blood.  It seems that a large number of people are watching the whole of True Blood season one, on FX, despite not really liking it.  I’m committing this act of insanity myself.

I want to be cured, and I can only assume that others feel the same way, which is why I am launching the True Blood Survivors Group.  We’re here to help you, comfort you and support you.  If you follow our twelve-step plan you too can stop watching this boring drama serial.

Every one of our members will be assigned a sponsor, a former True Blood watcher who has managed to learn not to watch a TV programme that they don’t like.  They can pass on the secrets to you, and help you through those dark moments when you can’t bring yourself to delete the series link on Sky Plus.

Join today – If you’re interested, leave a comment below.

Way back in my post, Gone West (Wing), I first mentioned ‘The Soap effect’ – the way in which watching a long running series can destroy your objectivity – and thought it was about time I looked at it in some more depth.  I’ve attempted to define the phenomenon:

The lack of objective opinion on a long running serial story brought about by prolonged exposure to that same serial.  This also incorporates the reluctance to cease watching\reading a long running serial story line because of a false sense of loyalty induced by prolonged exposure to the previously mentioned serial.

In the UK this effect is most clearly seen in the prime time soaps themselves and it isn’t surprising that these are our highest rated shows.  This isn’t exactly a ground-breaking revelation.  Where I think it becomes interesting is in relation to US television.  American TV seems to be undergoing a golden era, and there are undoubtedly lots of quality shows being made.   There also seems to be a more loyal fan base for lots of ‘cult’ shows at the moment, but how good are some of these shows really?  I think the fact that many US TV shows have seasons of 20+ episodes, and that they often have a strong serial element has vastly over inflated the stock of some programmes.

My anecdotal ‘evidence’ for this theory comes directly from my own viewing habits.  Since getting in to shows like The Wire and Battlestar Galactica years after they started I have become ever more vigilant in recording the opening episodes of new US TV shows.   Some of them are deleted almost instantly, like recent examples Harper’s Island and Warehouse 13, but some are watched and the series stuck with, with little enthusiasm.   Sometimes you can be two seasons in to a programme before you realise you don’t actually like it.  As a pop culture addict, there is a fear of missing out on ‘the next big thing’.

I mentioned in Gone West (Wing) that I had an early encounter with TSE with Star Trek: The Next Generation, a show that I can’t even bear to be on the screen these days.  Another example would be mega-popular ’sitcom’, Friends.  The few episodes that I saw of the early seasons I absolutely loathed, and it seemed to be the antithesis of everything I look for in a comedy.  It seemed to consist of nothing more than six inordinately good-looking people sat around in a coffee shop, each taking turns in delivering yawn-inducing ‘zingers’.   Somehow though, I started watching the show regularly around season five and watched them all through to the end, in season 10.  I suppose I must have warmed to the show a little, but I seriously have no idea why I watched it.  It possibly had something to do with fancying Jennifer Aniston, but that could hardly justify 6 seasons of a show you don’t like.  The thing is, I never watched it and saw it as a comedy show, more of a mildly amusing soap opera about totally unrealistic twenty\thirty-somethings.  Just the thought of watching it depresses me.

There are other shows where the concept of ‘loyalty’ and investment have kicked in.   I started watching Heroes as a life-long comic book fan, and found it rather mediocre.  It did, however, have a strong serial element and, unusually, had a decent pay off to season one, and no annoying cliffhanger, this being enough for me to look forward to the programmes future.  Sadly, seasons two and three were uniformly awful, completely muddled and lacking direction, and I should have given it up as a bad lot.  Yet, I’m still watching it, seemingly having forgotten how mediocre I thought it was originally and expecting it to get back to a standard that it never achieved in the first place.

Another super-hero themed show in which I’ve experienced a similar feeling is Smallville.  I watched the first few seasons of the young-Superman based show with some interest, but somewhere during season 3 I gave up on it.  I just couldn’t bear the poorly handled will-they-won’t-they relationship between Clark and Lana.  Years later, I caught up by watching repeats on T4, on Sunday afternoons, and quite enjoyed seasons 5 and 6.  Then came season 7, perhaps the worst season of US TV that I’ve watched in its entirety.  I won’t go in to all the reasons why it was so bad now, suffice to say that it was a stinker. And yet, I still watched season 8, which was an improvement in parts, but still had its exasperating moments.  I will watch season 9, whenever we get it over here, purely because I’ve watched 8 full seasons (more or less) of the programme and it would feel weird to give up with just one or two seasons to go.

The current master of this phenomenon is True Blood, HBO’s vampires in the deep south drama.  It’s a interesting concept and is obviously well made, with a good cast.  I still don’t really like it.  Nothing seems to have happened and I don’t care about any of the characters (besides the gay vampire chained to a sunbed), and by all rights I should stop watching.  But, I’ve watched 9 of the 12 episodes in season 1, and it seems a waste to give up now.  I’ve also heard that season 2 is an improvement and so I’ll probably end up watching that too.  Completely mental.

The least offensive programmes fall in to the category ‘programmes that I like but wouldn’t cry if I never saw again and wouldn’t contemplate watching twice’, some recent examples being: Chuck, Life, Psych and A Town Called Eureka. How many shows are you watching that would fit in this category?

I don’t know if I’ve been able to prove my point, I’m not sure that I even have a point.  From a personal view, I don’t really know what I should do about it.  Should I become harsher and stop watching any programmes that I’m not enjoying?  It seems the obvious solution, but, if it’s so obvious, why am I not doing that already?  I suspect I’ll just end up carrying on as I have been, but I’ll just be more aware that what I am doing is slightly mental.  I also hope that this doesn’t come across as an attack on US TV, the fact that I watch so many American programmes is why I’m writing about them and not British soap operas.  I just wonder if certain British TV shows would be more highly-rated if they ran over more episodes.

The new US television season is upon us. Or rather, upon the US.

Here in the UK we must endure several months before we can watch series which, by the time they’re broadcast in the UK, may have already have been cancelled.

The UK networks seem to have taken a more cautionary approach to buying up US drama in recent years. Time was, there used to be a stampede to buy up new drama series by the British networks, Channel Four was particularly good at splashing the cash willy-nilly, only to find the series limping to an abrupt close only seven episodes later, having already crashed-and-burned in the US.

So I guess I’ll have to wait for the new series of Mad Men – till next year? Sort it out, BBC4!

Happily, the  anticipated new series  FlashForward is the exception and Five is showing it more or less concurrently with across the Atlantic. But with its sci-fi storyline of everyone on the planet experiencing two minutes of their own future, it’s generating some ill-advised comparisons to Lost.

It would be great if we could watch all our favourite, or most anticipated US series, at more or less the same time. FlashForward aside, surely in this era of global PR and instantaneous downloads, someone can come up with a new rights paradigm, ensuring that those of us here in Europe can enjoy a series without having to wait forever and a day?

Or maybe should we just dismantle the networks altogether – it’s going to happen sooner or later, surely?

Jetzt gehts richtig los. Nach der Verleihung der Emmys am vergangenen Sonntag, 20. September 2009, starten die US Sender nun ins neue Herbstprogramm. ( ustv0910 )

Eine komplette Programmübersicht gibt es hier bei epguides.com.

Neustarts nach Datum: (verlinkte Serien führen zum Review auf diesem Blog)

bereits gestartet: Glee, The Vampire Diaries, Melrose Place, Beautiful Life, Community

• 20.9.: Bored To Death (Schriftsteller als Privatschnüffler)
• 21.9.: Accidentally On Purpose (Comedy, Ältere Frau mit jungem Mann)
• 22.9.: The Forgotten (Krimi, unbekannte Verbrechensopfer), The Good Wife (Polit/Justiz-Drama), NCIS: Los Angeles (Agenten-Action)
• 23.9.: Merci (3 Krankenschwestern), Modern Family (Doku-Comedy, 3 Familien), Eastwick (Fantasiefun, basiert auf Film “Die Hexen von Eastwick”), Cougar Town (Alleinerziehende Mutter, Comedy)
• 24.9.: Flash Forward (FBI, Mysterie, Zukunftsvisionen)
• 25.9.: Brothers (Ex-Footballer, Bruder im Rohlstuhl, Familien-Comedy)
• 28.9.: Trauma (Rettungssani-Action), Cleveland (Trickserie ala Family Guy)
• 30.9.: Hank (Ruhestands/Familien-Comedy), The Middle (Familien-Comedy)
• 2.10.: Stargate Universe (Scifi)
• 4.10.: Three Rivers (Organtransplantation, Medizin)
• 5.10.: Sherri (Mütter-Job/Familie Comedy)
• 7.10.: Secret Girlfriend (Experimentelle Beziehungsserie)
• 23.10.: White Collar (Trickbetrüger und FBI-Agent als Team)
• 3.11.: V (Alien Invasion)

The new season of Gossip Girl premiered over in the US last week, and the good news is that today ITV2 confirmed it will be broadcast over here from October 7th, as opposed to the usual January start from the past couple of years.

Ratings-wise, it wasn’t amazing… 2.5 million tuned in; obviously a very low number for a US series, but then ‘Gossip Girl’ has always defied the usual trends with ratings by being all over the press and attracting legions of screaming fans without having that many viewers. Perhaps its one to record or to watch online. But regardless, 3.65 million tuned in for the pilot and 3.38 million tuned in for the launch of Season 2, so 2.5 mil is quite low. That’s also below the average whole-season ratings for both Seasons 1 (2.59 million) and 2 (2.8 million). Hopefully a guest appearance from Hilary Duff will drag ratings up a bit later in the year.

As for the episode itself, it’s not difficult to find a legally-questionable rip on the net, but it does definitley entail Blair and Chuck being madly in love, Serena returning from a European trip with a few secrets to unravel, and Nate introducing a mysterious brunette to proceedings.

Its September, that time of year in the US where the new and returning slate of tv shows begin woot!

I’m not even in the US and the fall season always excites me!

I just watched Vampire Diaries a few nights ago – LOVE IT! Brooding leads, beautiful cast and well, vampires…whats not to like? I was a big Buffy fan

I also managed to catch Cycle 12 of America’s Next Top Model on Channel 5. It gets cheesier every year, but I still love Tyra and the ‘J’s. And of course hunky ‘noted fashion photographer’ Nigel Barker.

Melrose Place was …interesting….oh and of course, I’m just one more blog entry away from watching the premiere of Season 3 of Gossip Girl!! (I’m disciplining myself – must tell ppl abt VD (ooh, that didn’t come out right – Vampire Diaries) before I forget and get caught up in GG!)

Other shows I’m lookin’ forward to this Fall season are :

New series Eastwick – Charmed but older? hopefully wiser too?!

New series Fast Forward – I just can’t resist John Cho.

New seasons of Survivor, Amazing Race and Project Runway (Heidi’s preggers with her 4th! Amazing!)

I can’t think of any more off the top of my head, but when I was flipping thru the mio TV Season Pass catalogue earlier, wahlao, mentally ticking almost every other show! (too dark to flip thru now, kids are asleep, will do so tomorrow …with a highlighter!!)

ok, onward to my take on Vampire Diaries!

xoxo, s.

… Elen DeGeneres.

HOW RANDOM.

Guest judges including Victoria Beckham, Katy Perry, Shania Twain, Kelly Clarkson etc etc have been linked to one-off stints during the audition stages, but today it has been confirmed that DeGeneres will be Paula Adbul’s permenant replacement because of her “experience entertaining in front of millions every day” and her “quick wit”.

She will be brilliant value and she will be hilariously entertaining (unless she goes for “too nice”), but it is a bit random seeing as her experience in the mainstream music industry amounts to just about nil.

BUT on the other hand, let’s not forget however that Ellen is responsible for one of the greatest musical moments of all time:

Ratings for Brothers and Sisters have never been of “OMG WOW” proportions in the UK, but its fanbase is amazingly loyal and, in the US, it’s still averaging in excess of ten million viewers a season.

A trailer for Season 4 emerged today and FLIPPIN’ HECK it’s a corker. ‘Brothers and Sisters’ has never been a very sensational show, so people who like their television a little more ‘Desperate Housewives’-style over-the-top may find this a bit tame, but by ‘B&S’ standards it’s pretty exciting.

Note the engagement ring action between Justin and Rebecca, the near-miss car accident, Nora and Holly fighting again (always a favourite), Kitty and Robert fighting for their marriage… and Kitty getting some dramatic health news.

Last week Britney Spears appeared on David Letterman’s chatshow for an awkward comedy spot in her underwear, and this week she’s in a new MTV Video Music Awards promo with Russel Brand for an awkward comedy spot in her underwear.

Brand did a surprisingly good job at last year’s ceremony, despite earning himself a catty swipe from Jordin Sparks when he made fun of the Jonas Brothers’ virginity. As for Britney, she was quite robotic last year but her presence was admirable following the train wreck performance of ‘Gimme More’ in 2007. Apparently she may perform again this year… as long as it tops her “walk around silently” routine from ‘The X Factor’, here’s hoping she nails it.

Britney leads the VMA nominations list along with the likes of Lady GaGa, and the ceremony is next month. It seems a bit unfair though that the directors don’t get to pick up the awards instead of the stars. Hmm.

As Florence and the Machine once said, the Duff days are over (or something like that). She was the Miley Cyrus of the early noughties, but since her Disney TV series came to an end Hilary Duff has been dividing her time between average pop projects, average fashion projects and average film projects. It’s only really with hindsight that you realise she never really was that good (“We knew that all along, dickhead” – Everyone).

Earlier this year she bought out a ridiculously pointless ’Best Of’ compilation featuring all, er, five of her UK singles (it failed to crack the Top 100 on either side of the Atlantic); and her last big screen project was an almighty flop despite her above-average-for-once reviews. Musically, more recent Disney stars (Cyrus, Lovato… even Hudgens) are bringing out much more accessible material and are getting much more “creatively involved”, and as a result the Hilary-era hasn’t stood the test of time and the majority of her releases haven’t aged well. And in terms of her cinematic career, there could only be so many ‘A Cinderella Story’/'Cheaper By The Dozen’/'Material Girls’ type movies before someone said “Waaaiiit a minute… you’re the same in every film!”

But she’s been quite busy lately, with a couple of indie films awaiting release and a couple of TV projects lined up as well. WARNING: Some of these projects actually could be quite good.

For a start she’s getting a multi-episode stint in Gossip Girl this season, as a famous movie star looking for a normal college experience. Nothing too meaty then, but in fairness ‘Gossip Girl’ is amazing because of its ridiculous trashiness, so hopefully this will be a good high-profile job for her. Plus this picture hints at a raunchy storyline with Dan:

Perhaps the most promising film she has coming up is called ‘Greta’ in which she plays a girl called… Greta. To be honest it looks as though her almost hilarious emotional breakdowns have stayed with her, but that aside it does look as though maybe her acting is ‘coming along a bit’. It doesn’t look like it will make more than £18 at the Box Office (in fact some sources reckon it will go straight to DVD), but credit to her for taking on a more indie role. Here’s the trailer:

Other film projects awaiting release include ‘Stay Cool’ with Winona Ryder and, most high-profile of all, the role of Bonnie in ‘The Story of Bonnie and Clyde’. We can’t see her being amazing in that to be honest, but we’ll wait and see. There’s also a rather good looking film called ‘What Goes Up’ with Steve Coogan, ‘Juno’ star Olivia Thrilby, and the generally hilarious Molly Shannon that has been panned by many critics but praised by others as “darkly funny and wonderfully twisted”. Oooh. It’s already fled rapidly to DVD in the US and there’s no word on any UK release whatsoever, so it’s unlikely to open any new doors career-wise, but in terms of acting performance it could prove that she is indeed making slight progress.

It’s hard not to wish Duff well… throughout her career she’s been likeable, despite never really being very good, so maybe with these new projects she might be able to force herself back into popular demand. As long as she steers cleer of bubblegum pop-rock for all eternity.

The new season of Desperate Housewives kicks off in the US in almost exactly a month’s time, so now seems a good moment to decide how excited to be.

The most noteable thing about the promotional shots being knocked around is of course the absence of Nicollette Sheridan as Edie Britt. Her demise in Season 5 will leave a noticeable hole in the show, and hopefully the writers can find a good way to fill it. Her place in the line-up has been taken by Katherine (Dana Delaney), and the main promo for Season 6 shows her and the other four atop a mountain of apples. How unsafe.

As loveable as Katherine is, she did feel a little superfluous throughout the last season, and she lost alot of the edge and quickfire wit she landed on Wisteria Lane with when she arrived in Season 4. It’s as though when she decided to become friends with the ladies she stopped being interesting. But apparently the producers have promised that Katherine will be on fire this season (not literally… though given past storylines it would hardly be surprising) so hopefully she won’t feel so pointless.

Andrea Bowen is back as Susan’s daughter Julie, and apparently she will be strangled (!) by the end of the first episode. Standard. ABC have done a great job of keeping the identity of Mike’s “mystery bride” quiet, but apparently whoever its not will be ‘a little depressed’. Nice juicy spoiler that one.

Mrs McCluskey is going to get a new love interest, which could be quite amusing, Lee will take over from Edie as the main estate agent on Wisteria Lane, and Jesse Metcalfe will be back as Gabrielle’s old affair-buddy John to have a relationship with her niece Ana, who apparently is going to be a complete pain in the arse for a large chunk of the season. The main mystery storyline will most likely revolve around a new family, and will probably be linked to Julie’s strangling. Logically therefore it may be safe to assume that the mystery storyline will, once again, have alot to do with Susan. “Oh good”.

A US columnist has reported that officials at ABC are trying to halt a storyline where Lynette deals with her pregnancy with an abortion, because apparently it’s too touchy a subject. Look at the back catalogue of storylines and this is clearly ridiculous. Marc Cherry has said in an interview that he wants to do a big ‘Who shot JR?’-esque storyline with one of the major characters, but whether or not this will happen this season is unconfirmed.

Channel 4 has adopted a strange habit of airing the series in weird chunks, so when it will begin airing Season 6 remains to be seen. Hopefully it won’t be too long, and we won’t be kept too far behind the American viewership like we are with many other series’. But those who follow it at States-pace will be interested to learn that the show returns on September 27th.

“Das Plakat” von Vera Lengsfeld mit der mächtigsten Bundeskanzlerin der Welt, Angela Merkel hat es nun auch in die Late-Night-Show des US-Komikers Stephen Colbert geschafft. Unter dem Gejohle der Studio-Gäste übersetzte der Moderator den CDU-Slogan: “Wir haben mehr zu bieten!”
almabu’s Blog berichtete über die beiden schwarzen Spind-Luder.

They already air ‘One Tree Hill’, ‘Gossip Girl’ and ‘90210′, and this year we’re getting two more exciting series’ from American network The CW. We’ll get to ‘The Beautiful Life’ in due course, but Melrose Place, which is kicking off in the States in just a few weeks’ time, is looking pretty exciting.

After the success of the ‘90210′ reboot, this is a revamp of a successful 90s series that starred Heather Locklear, ‘Desperate Housewives’ regulars Marcia Cross and Doug Savant, and ‘Gossip Girl’ star Kelly Rutherford. This time around the cast list features ‘Cloverfield’ actress Jessica Lucas (she was also Kimberley in ‘90210′) and, interestingly, Ashlee Simspon-Wentz, as well as a few faces from the original series.

Like ‘90210′ this will either be trashy and addictive or just plain trashy. For a start it’s not a groundbreakingly exciting concept – it’s about a group of wealthy twentysomethings living in a trendy LA neighbourhood – and the poster taglines include “Tuesday is Humpday” and “Menage-A-Tues” (anybody guess what day this thing’s going to air?). Check out also how the cast have been Photoshopped to the point where they look like Sims on one of the posters.

But if all goes well this could be a great new show to get stuck into. A preview clocking in at just under five minutes has been released, and it’s hard to keep track of the billions of characters we get introduced to but this is nonetheless quite promising. Check out how dramatic it suddenly gets just before the end. Anybody feel a murder mystery storyline coming on?

‘Melrose Place’ launches mid-September in the US, and presumably an early 2010 launch is lined up for broadcast over here.

Britney Spears has become a bit of a robot in recent times; keeping her mouth either shut or scripted for the majority of her very few promotional appearances (‘The X Factor’ last year being a particular low point). So really, her appearance on David Letterman’s chatshow last night was a good thing, as it reminded us all that she does in fact still come equipped with a smidgeon of personality.

But is it just us or is this actually really uncomfortable viewing?

Sunday 13th September
7-8.20 Football Night in America
Running since 2006, not broadcast in the UK.
8.20-11 NBC Sunday Night Football
Running since 2006, not broadcast in the UK.

Monday 13th September
10-11 The Jay Leno Show
New series, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.

Tuesday 15th September
8-10 The Biggest Loser
Eighth season, not broadcast in the UK.

Thursday 17th September
8-8.30 Community
New series, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.
8.30-9 Parks and Recreation
Second season, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.
9-9.30 The Office
Sixth season, airs in the UK on ITV2.
Starring 40 Year Old Virgin actor Steve Carell.

Monday 21st September
8-9 Heroes
Fourth season, airs in the UK on BBC2 and BBC3.

Wednesday 23rd September
8-9 Mercy
New series, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.
9-10 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit
Eleventh season, airs in the UK on Five.

Friday 25th September
8-9 Law & Order
Twentieth season, airs in the UK on Sky1.
9-10 Southland
Second season, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.
Starring ex-The O.C. actor Benjamin McKenzie.

Saturday 26th September
8-9 Dateline NBC
Running since 1992, not broadcast in the UK.
Similar in format to BBC series Panorama.

Monday 28th September
9-10 Trauma
New series, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.

Thursday 15th October
9.30-10 30 Rock
Fourth season, airs in the UK on Five.
Starring Mean Girls writer and actress Tina Fey.

Taking a large chunk out of NBC’s primetime scheduling for the 2009-2010 season is The Jay Leno Show. For UK TV viewers oblivious as to this as importance, let me explain. Similarly to Friday Night with Johnathan Ross, Stateside you have a programming block on the major networks called Late Night. Search YouTube for interviews with your favourite actors and actresses and you’ll find interviews from any one of Late Night with Conan O’Brien, The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, Last Call with Carson Daly, Late Night with David Letterman or The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson. The thing is that during the summer, Conan O’Brien became the new host of The Tonight Show, leaving Jay Leno out of a job – but knowing that Jay Leno is worth $’s, NBC gave him a primetime slot – a risky move in that The Jay Leno Show occupies Monday to Friday night’s 10-11 slot. However, all it means for us fans of numerous TV shows is that there is another show with celebrity interviews, which is only ever good (especially come September when all will be whoring themselves out promoting their new series or seasons).

I have, on occasion, watched Heroes, although I have pretty much tuned out – am I the only one who wants Elle Bishop back though (sorry, huge fan of Veronica Mars sitting here and Kristen Bell rules!)? The only other show coming this fall to NBC that I am interested in a UK broadcaster picking up is Mercy starring ex-Buffy actress Michelle Trachtenberg – known to most these days as Georgina Sparks on Gossip Girl – don’t worry guys, Michelle T may be contracted to Mercy now but the Gossip Girl producers had a clause put in her contract so they could wrap up Georgina’s storyline in NYU for Season 3 of Gossip Girl. Other than that? I hate CBS for the number of crime-scene procedurals they broadcast and despite shows like Law & Order being practical royalty so it seems of primetime TV land – I’m not interested!

Saturday 12th September
8-8.30/8.30-9 COPS
Running since 1989, not broadcast in the UK.
9-10 America’s Most Wanted
Running since 1988, not broadcast in the UK.

Sunday 13th September
7-8 NFL Overrun / The OT
Running since 1994, not broadcast in the UK.

Wednesday 16th September
8-9 So You Think You Can Dance
Sixth season, not broadcast in the UK.
9-10 Glee
New series, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.

Thursday 17th September
8-9 Bones
Fifth season, airs in the UK on Sky1.
9-10 Fringe
Second season, airs in the UK on Sky1.

Monday 21st September
8-9 House
Sixth season, airs in the UK on Sky1.

Friday 25th September
8-8.30 Brothers
New series, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.
9-10 Dollhouse
Second season, airs in the UK on Sci-Fi.

Sunday 27th September
8-8.30 The Simpsons
Twenty-first season, airs in the UK on Sky1.
8.30-9 The Cleveland Show
New series, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.
9-9.30 Family Guy
Eight season, airs in the UK on FX.
9.30-10 American Dad
Fifth season, airs in the UK on FX.

Monday 28th September
9-10 Lie To Me
Second season, airs in the UK on Sky1.

Friday 2nd October
8.30-9 Til’ Death
Fourth season, airs in the UK on Five.

Tuesday 27th October
8-10 So You Think You Can Dance
Sixth season, not broadcast in the UK.

FOX broadcasts some of the most well known American television programmes imported for British television including shows like The Simpsons, House and Bones. This season see’s the much hyped Glee take centre stage, literally. Its a musical comedy based on a show choir. Funtimes! Dollhouse is placed in the precarious “Friday night death slot” despite abismal ratings as a midseason show (the first season aired from February 2009 and got picked up before FOX’s press event for the new TV season). Despite knowing that this show really has to prove itself this time around, I can’t help but look back at Buffy the Vampire Slayer and say let’s compare. Buffy only got a 13 episode order when it started out. The WB then renewed it for a second season of 22 episodes and it became arguably the best season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer (you know, the one where Angel loses his soul and becomes a complete and utter barsteward). Point being is that Joss Whedon knows where this show is heading, just watch and let him take you on the journey, not the other way around.

There is however one problem with my theory on Dollhouse. Buffy was aired on the much smaller network of The WB – back when The WB was still finding its ground and therefore, 3million viewers wouldn’t have been bad. For FOX, who every January invite American Idol into everyone’s homes and hit nearly 20million viewers every episode, Dollhouse won’t make the cut. It’s a shame that the network thinks that way and a lot can be said about FOX prematurely cancelling some pretty awesome shows in the past – as I hear Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles was an awesome show. So was Firefly, apparently (bad Whedon fangirl) and so was Tru Calling (that, I did watch). Fingers crossed for the new season. And you know I’ll be all over Twitter bigging it up especially after that lost episode!

Tuesday 8th September
8-9 90210
Second season, airs in the UK on E4.
9-10 Melrose Place
New series, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.

Wednesday 9th September
8-9 America’s Next Top Model
Thirteenth season, airs in the UK on Living TV.

Thursday 10th September
8-9 The Vampire Diaries
New series, to be aired in the UK on ITV2.
9-10 Supernatural
Fifth series, airs in the UK on ITV2.

Monday 14th September
8-9 One Tree Hill
Seventh season, airs in the UK on E4.
9-10 Gossip Girl
Third season, airs in the UK on ITV2.

Wednesday 16th September
9-10 The Beautiful Life: TBL
New series, no UK broadcast rights sold as of yet.

Friday 25th September
8-9 Smallville
Ninth season, airs in the UK on E4.

Odd how The CW has a limited broadcast schedule yet still manages to produce the shows that every teenager is yapping on about. I’m a self confessed Gossip Girl addict, 90210 ain’t great but even that can have me hooked (especially because I want to see bad Annie beat the living daylights out of nasty Naomi) and with the introduction of a re-hashed version of 90’s hit Melrose Place, I’m wondering why The CW ever cancelled Veronica Mars?! Ugh. Whatever. I’m over it. I want a #veronicamarsmovie anyways!

The CW aim to cash in on the whole vampires thing post-Twilight with The Vampire Diaries (so do ITV2 by the way who already have the rights to it) only, these kids need to go and watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer and whether The Beautiful Life makes it to air or not is another question due to ex-The O.C. actress Mischa Barton’s trips into hospitable of late.

Old school TV shows like One Tree Hill, Supernatural and Smallville prop up The CW’s schedule alongside Tyra Banks and the #1 show in The CW, America’s Next Top Model. Luckily for Dollhouse fans, The CW has no competition in the same timeslot, an encore presentation of America’s Next Top Model – which is good being as Joss Whedon’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer was the teen show of its own generation, on The WB (which is basically what The CW is now). In other words, competition would just be unsportsman considering the shows that occupied the timeslots less than ten years ago for this network completely ruled and now they, well, don’t. Shame it is. I want smart teen drama back but not before another helping of Ed Westwick.